True, you better have a LOT OF courage, if you have any value ! So many narcissists and evil spirits who thrive by making up cheap libel against their fellowmen !
It's really a shame that a reputation can be ruined by some rumours spread by haters. But then again, we just have to just use it to our advantage and push forward. The advantage is, you'll know who the people are around you. The people who love us stay. And the fake people get highlighted, fake a smile to them and stay away from them. Don't let those who want to bring you down in your circle. Keep the ones who always believed in you. And when you do finally come out to be a great human being, always remember those who stood by you.
I suffred loss of reputation when I was imprisoned for one year, I lost almost all of my friends, my job, it was pretty much like walking naked down the street, painful and lonely it is, even though its getting better now, but the matter of freedom it brought to me was enormous, everyone now saw me for who I really am and they have the choice whether to leave or stay I don't really care anymore
Same thing happened to me, it ruins current and future relationships due to what people perceive you as. Eventually and gratefully we learn to get used to it and move on and whether people wanna be apart of our lives or not is solely out of our control.
Sometimes you lose your reputation because you stood up and took an unpopular position, because you believed it was the right thing to do. If this happens to you, be assured: the ancient Greeks considered this courageous and an important act for civic life.
Exactly. Especially if you were innocent, or endured instutional betrayal or religious persecution etc. I feel too scared to attempt to share or be heard anymore and instead called crazy or a liar.
@@leahc9695 Its funny when you think outside the box and want to express your truths. But do be labeled as crazy. When you just no longer want to be a sheep in this society. So it's like a choice either go with the masses or be labeled as an outcast.
I've done that. Now everyone thinks I'm "super evil far right" monster just because I took a position saying I don't want my people to be ethnically replaced. How ironic, I'm advocating for their wellbeing and survival and they return the favor with malice because everyday the media they consume tells them "people like me" are bad. They can't see beyond the label others have attributed to folks like me, they can't see that I'm genuinely concerned for them and their future. They believe I'm motivated by hate because the media says so but how could loving your people be hate? Wanting what's good for your people, wanting them to survive is hate just because a person working in a publishing institution said so? Brainwashing is very real indeed.
I think it is the other way around. Reputation is easy to get and hard to lose. There is a different version of you in the minds of everyone who knows you. It is how they perceive you. To a point, they control it, not you. To change that you have to do something that they perceive as extraordinarily good, extraordinarily bad or in direct opposition to what they think of you.
Pina Colada Sipping MGTOW so if i made a gap year at the first year of medical university bcs my parents abused me and at the end made me do it,i put my studies in the state of stillnes from psychiatrists ,made a gap year,didn’t lost the buget ,i still don’t have to pay anything bcs i didn’t renew the year i took a gap year, and i got back after one year,i didn’t even go the year i got accepted,just one month but i had to sell some other story to people so i said i am trying to go to a even better university,i couldn’t tell my parents are retarded and they ruined my life from the moment i was born ,do u believe if i prove that this knowledge that i want for myself anyway but with the top score since that matters..i can still like prove them that i am still the same or better..when we all prepared the exam for uni and i did it for three months i started in the last momt,and they did it like whole school year ,they admired me xd do u think i can rebuild my reputation?...i have no problem with people in my year they respect me and appreciate me but other people from the past i am not sure what kind a person i am now to them..or i should just keep going with ignoring what they think bcs i never cared since i never had a problem with that i was always really successful at school and everyone knows that...
@@joeyshabbadoo I don't think he meant that as a threat, but perhaps as a warning, from someone who wants you to be safe. And I think he's right. It's wonderful to not let bad reputation bother you on the inside. But there are still many places in the world where a bad reputation in your community will get you killed by someone (or thrown out of the community, which can also be a death sentence in some areas.) Those of us that live in safe, rich countries may see this video very differently than others might.
@@MissKellyBean Yes, if what you mean is that the herd acts in a more refined way in rich, more evolved societies. In my view its the same difference between a common criminal and a white shirt criminal.
Um sometimes that goes beyond that, in order to get a house or a job etc where it goes that far as to some self love and what other people think... Your whole livelihood is often ruined. Just sayin
@@leahc9695 No. Credit is a slavery. Mortgage also. Job, if it is worthy and you doing it the best, there is bo alternative. Losing/not getting a job is sometimes a blessing in desguise.
False allegations can do so much harm. Some people think that false allegations against them can’t affect them because they think everyone knows they wouldn’t do such a thing. But that’s not the truth. All it takes is one person with the intent to lie to others about you to make you look bad and soon everyone believes that lie and no matter what you say or how much you try to prove you did nothing wrong, it won’t matter. In today’s society no one confirms for truth they just believe what they’re told and won’t believe the accused. Just love knowing that you know the truth and there are things you can do.
Something that I heard a long time ago that always resonated with me was "if you don't like what people are saying about you, then change the conversation." Basically, if you give people something else to talk about then they will talk about something else.
You make it sound like it's something bad... "Until you've lost your reputation, you never realize what a burden it was or what freedom really is." - Margaret Mitchell
I was partly joking, and somewhat severe, SeriousShark. I have found that telling people what you really think can be the best thing even if they reject you as a result. It is better to care what you think of other people than what they think of you. It seems unlikely that we can accurately predict what others think of us because we are never free of the lens of our own perception. Do you speak from experience?
This is kind of the quandary I'm in now of tired of having to play a 'character' all day. Its exhausting trying to please everybody, much less strangers
Have someone accuse you of being a child molester and see how fast that non-reputation starts to look really good next to a bad one. We all have reputations even if you don't believe you do. It's only when someone destroys it that you realize what you truly had.
Actually your wrong. You think u right cuz you don’t know every situation that happenes to people. My best friends father killed himself just because he was accused of trying to rape his own daughter in law, while the her husband was in the orther room , in the same house. She hated living with her in-laws and , found that way to request to move out , she just jumped and came out saying that he was trying to rape her. Of course everybody believed her , and who knows how they treated him that month. He killed himslefl in about a month
Such a good view on reputation and what it really means in society. Also, the solution for what to do if the worst case happens is so great. So true and both sad and hilarious at the same time.
I lost my reputation once cause by the people hatred with NO grounded evidences until NOW. But slowly but sure I prove them wrong and nice things in life still happen to me right now. I make them embarrased for what they thought about me, but resiliently, I show them little by little and slowly with patience to make them see that without reputation I still be just a human being who no mistake-proof, trying to be a good with just all I have. Just don’t loose faith. Somewhere someone will find the beauty inside you.
Also I love how you tell us that we should love other people for their humanity alone but then tell us that literally the entirety of society will hate us with no coming back if we have less than a shred of reputation. Yes, love the “people” that will relentlessly tear you apart without a second thought. That totally doesn’t make them complete utter bastards, doesn’t it?
Well the entirety of society will hate us because they dont actually know who we are and they dont care to think about us. What i got from this is that treating people with love and kindness is the only way for some of them to stop and think about you. Some of them will eventually figure out youre not that bad. By doing this at least a small amount of people will start seeing you for who you are, and that might be enough to survive the rest of society who doesnt listen
That was beautiful. I Literally just had a thought about how my possibilities were limited by my percieved reputation and not my abilities. This helped, thanks
It's mind blowing how another human being will ruin an innocent persons reputation by making up lies about them. I never in my wildest dreams thought there would be people that would purposely make up stories about another person to ruin their life it's just pure evil and insecurity on a higher level. Number one rule stay away from those who gossip and strive off of drama.
@@emilysavage2151 my best friend sometimes used to tell me of his fustration with my propensity to include a typo in my online writings. But they dont call my the typo king👑 for nothing. I'm not the king they wanted but I'm the king they got 🎭
So it’s “Yup, you’re very much fucked. Learn to live with it, move out of town and make new friends, preferably losers too” Thank you, School of Life. That’s what I needed today.
Exactly my thoughts (and situation). So many unsung heroes who were falsely accused too... Dying with the pain and knowledge that they were innocent and faught for the greater good. Like my dad. It's so unfair it ends this way. And the power of greater evil win, and "karma" never comes. Yet we are fed pipe dreams that the truth always comes up. Truth is more closer to, it is what it is.
I think its not healthy to identify with losership but those who do are very honest, went though hell and would never abandon their morals for materialistic benefit. But apparently they seem to be quite rare. There is only one person i know who truly embodies this except me and she died ;_______; I've always hoped that great people are great because of their morals but it is about popularity. I wonder if you can be great and completly stay true to your morals. What do you think?
If you're unfortunate to know a Narcissist or have one in the family, get away from them ASAP, it will save your Spirit and Reputation a lot of trouble.
Shorthand for a jerk you don’t like. Psychologizimg people is what’s in style now. Look at yourself first, ,then you’ll see how you contribute to these issues.
Once, I moved my family of 5 out of our home country because of a loss of reputation. It was devastating. Now I watch back with tea and popcorn at the implosion. It wasn't us. It wasn't them. It was a culture that never solidified before the money took hold. Good luck to you, folks. We're hoping for luck here too.
I desperately needed this. A couple of months ago I left a particular group because I hold slightly different values to them. I am now, I suspect, a pariah. Yet I keep thinking that the only thing worse than them all hating me would be them all still liking me. As that would mean not being true to myself. Luckily I have people who do love me. NB For Alain: *some* fallen politicians are scoundrels.
I too left a group of friends, among them, my best friend. I initially ghosted, but a couple of months after, I sent her a letter apologizing for the abrupt ending, and wishing her the best. I didn't explained the details of the ending of the friendship , but I left because she was always projecting her insecurities on me (that were NOT caused by me), and lashing out at me for that same reason. I never defended myself, I never set boundaries, I was for many years a people pleaser and a doormat. After leaving that friendship she destroyed my whole reputation, created a lot of gossip with professors from the university I went to for undergrad. Those professors don't want to have anything to do with me now. One of them was the most important professor of my entire career. My ex best friend basically destroyed me, and isolated me from almost everyone I knew from my undergrad program. It feels very unfair, and nobody cared to know about my version of the story. I have been my own support system since two years ago. I admire the people how have gone through this.
Even in developed societies, "be nice to everyone, offer a listening ear" and they'll use you, disrespect you and then throw you out once your usefulness is over.
I’ve stumbled upon your videos through my recommendations. Every time one came up, I felt drawn in by the relevant title. These videos have such a balance, they’re succinct and easy to understand. I was originally skeptical, thinking, “well here’s another wellness channel.” But this content is of such value and high quality, I have difficulty expressing my appreciation without writing a novel. I wish I was your friend! Thank you so much for everything you’ve created.
if 'reputation' can be ruined in a second, then it is not worthy to be worried for a lifetime. make your own' reputation' (by being kind and being yourself) and it will stay for a lifetime.
There is nothing which ruins the reputation, the psyche and the life of an individual faster than having any type of Autism. Asperger's is the worst condition. Being intelligent, creative, caring, hard-working, diligent, talented, helpful, an introvert but lacking in social skills feels like a death sentence and a constant torment. The person only lives halfway in this world and since the brain is totally unique it's almost impossible to properly connect with others.
A reputation is a public property, and accordingly out of your control. You have to be aware of its pros and cons. As social currency, it makes life easier but, it shouldn't be seen as a measure of your self-worth. The wisdom of crowds has its limits just ask a lemming.
I've been dealing with this off and on for about 15 years and it's awful to hear 3rd or 4th hand knowing that a lot of people who don't know you very well have a negative view of you. I haven't ever been able to completely forget what people say about me and it's a helpless feeling knowing you can't change their minds. Especially if you don't even know who is spreading the rumors. It's also especially hard when you're well known in your town in general. Add to that I have an older brother who is also well known and well liked in town. He's seen as an angel but the cost of that to me has never been worth it because he is viewed that way because he sacrifices his time and emotionally energy to be loved by everyone and I speak my mind more than he does and I'm "prickly" as I've been told. If I'm in a bad mood I don't hide it as well and I may seem uninterested in what someone is talking to me about. I won't small talk as well as my brother and so people think I'm an asshole, or cocky or.... Little do they know their negative views of me hurt me a lot. I feel like it's too late to change anyone's mind so I feel at a loss. I've also had women say, oh I heard you were a player which is the male equivalent to me telling a girl I heard you were a slut and that has always bothered me the most. Full disclosure but I do love women and I have been intimate with a lot of women over the years and I have not been dishonest with them or made promises to them so that I could sleep with them but if they sleep with me or get feelings for me and I'm not interested in being in a relationship with them then I'm automatically a player. As I've gotten older it's affected my ability to be intimate with people. I get a lot of anxiety when I go to public places where there will be a lot of people who "know" me or think they know me. I feel very shy and uncomfortable around acquaintances because they are most likely to be the people who have heard negative opinions or gossip about me. It makes me want to move and start over.
Ex convicts are a great idea 😂 - come to Australia - we’ve got loads of Them. We don’t worry too much about reputation here. Keep ya self tidy and you’ll be fine.
My reputation was lost by jealousy and moving to a new state, NOT by what I had done. And even after proving I was innocent, it didn’t matter. I was still someone new who was a pariah and shamed the community for misjudging. I still had to move.
I don't really care about my reputation because someone out there will always hate me why should I be concerned how others think of me ? You can do everything good and someone will still hate you. Just respect life and life will reward you.
You are who you are. and in reality you live in a society that is why you will always have a reputation, whether good or bad, which will be granted by others, not by you. You only have the choice to be who you are. There's no escape.
Its so fascinating how my youtube recommendations consists of these wondrous channels, school of life, pursuit of wonder, and Sadghuru!!! Ahhhh youtube youre my life medicine!
Thank you school of life! I really needed to watch this video because you've described my situation perfectly and helped me accept all the things that i should. Thank you once again!
Thanks for these videos. They're very often a source of inspiration and reflection. From my experience I think that an important distinction has been elided in the video. It's still a helpful video, but here's the deal for me. A person can lose their reputation, in addition to doing some obvious wrongs. A person can also lose reputation and experience shame and isolation and 'dark thoughts' as a result of doing the right thing. Doing what you know to be right on most levels, but to still be regarded as a pariah to others. For example, leaving a narc / abusive relationship. Or otherwise standing up for yourself against others who may be manipulating, controlling or otherwise hurtful and so on. That's all. The message is still helpful, but I wish there would be more thought to more variety as to situational circumstances and moral judgements. Thanks for reading and have a lovely week!
We are all social creatures so reputations are important. That's why we care what our friends think of us and why we put effort into relationships. I think it can be easily confused with craving applause, which has more to do with craving attention and anti-social degrees of competitiveness. Reputations represent the inherently fragile reality of human connection. E.g. Are we thoughtful, empathetic, responsible etc? Do we give as well as take? These are pro-social qualities and how our reputations (standings) rise and fall. Groups reward those that improve the group's well-being and punish those that jeopardise it.
well, were you popular at school? I wasnt, and got snubbed at all levels for years and years. Not everyone was unkind, got a chance of a trade apprenticeship because the other workers thought me to be ok. I tend to pass on any chances to 'losers' if at all possible. The more popular people in society are scared of losing credibility/status, when the truth is...is we all bite the dust at some point in our lives. Be who you are, if you got some close friends who might correct you at times, listen to them and take a look at yourself because they could well be right. Most people have a certain amount of give and take. I think the most tragic is when you get your reputation ruined from people telling lies. Try living in a small town, in a small country where there is no escape whatsoever. Its not fun.
you have no understanding of this life. you do have a reputation. even those you deem worthy deem YOU worthy for certain reason bro. even if your the butt of every joke. THATS your reputation. wether you like it or not.
I am a young guy in school . About a year ago, I offended someone and they spread a rumor that I was addicted to porn and that I was a pedophile. Because of this rumor, I have had my reputation impact it to a horrible degree. I don’t even know how to come back from that type of thing now all the girls at school avoid me and think that I look at them. I don’t even know what to do anymore. If I’m trying to defend myself, everyone assumes it’s just a lie. And the rumors just keep on building up. 😢
If there is no factual value to the rumors, prevent yourself from attaching any value whatsoever to them in the first place. (I use the word 'prevent' because it is something we seem to do without prior thinking.) With this right frame of mind, you should be able to maintain composure - not getting angry and agitated - so that your ability to remain focused on simply getting things done and not making debilitating mistakes is not severely undermined; and to conjure the will to rebuild/restore what has been lost in even a better way than before. This'll take time, buddy, so please be patient on your demanding-but-eventually-rewarding journey.
We can forgive ourselves and each other- after taking full responsibility and seeing where the mistakes are coming from. We all deserve love. Those who don't come from a place of understanding upon seeing one's position is not worth your time (they're on their ego trip). We are humans with errors- but the error mustn't be repeated if you are compassionate to yourself.
Gotta say, it's nice to not care about reputation. It is awful, however, when someone you know who said they loved you suddenly turns and makes intentional steps to sabotage your reputation... It's not so much that I care to be popular... It would just be nice to be at peace knowing that I can mind my own business and not be bothered.
I lost a parent to suicide and this has ruined my reputation. I was unaware of stigmas and too traumatised to act in appropriate ways or realise I should hide the situation. 💔
How to start again when the internet remembers you forever ? It's impossible. You're one search away from a reminder of your mistakes. They won't allow you to grow or change. The internet is one big chain around the individual forcing him to be forever connected to others, it's sickening.
how this doesn't have more likes is scary, how oblivious some of these people are. Everyone thinks they're immune till the most wild shit gets made up about you and put on reddit, and even more, like me...written by the media as a public figure.
yep.This is the issue. The only way I've come to deal is self-talk throughout the entire day when I'm out. Constantly telling myself I'm okay until I get home. It's so exhausting. I'm not that person.
WTF! at the moment I am being sued for libel (after defaming someone on facebook, in support of another person). And despite being a revered and good member of my community, I feel like such a pariah right now when my case went public. I'm still waiting for my court date (for amicable settlement) but still, i feel like a nobody. I want to hide from everyone else. Thank God the internet exists because it's my refuge right now. This video could not be more on time
GOOD DONT TALK SHIT. ITS PEOPLE LIKE YOU THAT CHIME IN AND RUIN PEOPLE OVER NIGHT. LEAVE IT. I HOPE YOU GOT SUED TO THE MOON AND BACK. I WAS RUINED FOR NOT JUST THE PERSON THAT MADE A SOCIAL MEDIA LIES BUT THE SPREADERS OF THE LIE. THE SHEEP. YOU. AND YOU COMPLAIN??????!!!!!!
I think the reason most people disagree with this video is because it's hurtfully true. There are only very specific cases when one can go back to the way things were, but truth be said they never can be in most cases. The only thing one can do is accept the situation and realise the ones who are true to you, that's when you'll come to see that the ostracism from the exhausting areas of the society can prove to be healthy.
Most people in the world believe that God exists. For those of us who trust in God, we can overcome a bad reputation by asking forgiveness, trusting him to help, and feeling his support. He will show us exactly what to do to fix a reputation
It was 5 years ago for me, one lie destroyed me at the peak of my career, which i also loved. i still struggle with getting emotionally invested in anything or anyone. I do the things. But i cant summon the naivete that seems to be necessary to feel hope.
Because of O.C.D. and anxiety problems, everybody thinks I'm a freak. There are people at work who walk by me like I'm not even there if I say hello to them. People I havn't seen in years, will say things like "I heard you went crazy"or they'll "look" at me in a certain way while they're talking to me. So, this is apparantly my new reputation.There was a time when making friends came so easy to me. I don't think I really appreciated it. I hope I come out the other side of this a better person. #mentalillnesssucks
I feel like the idea of a reputation is foreign to me, sounds like something people worried about in the 60s. It must be that the society I live in has gone beyond this idea, or that I'm so socially unaware so as to never have had a reputation. Either way I'm grateful, maintaining a reputation sounds like a pain the ass.
The idea that a reputation is a pain is forgetting that your reputation is your social currency, and when you rely on the regard of others to function effectively in your community - which we all do - then then you realise the value of reputation. Trust is earned. If you want the benefits of being trusted, you have to look after it. Once lost, it can be regained, but not without cost.
maya moon well having sex with (maybe) strangers, that everyone can see, as your job is also a crazy choice to make when there are so many other jobs you could've choosen. I mean, you should've seen what was coming by choosing that job in the adult industry.
you sound just retarded, and tbh that's probably easier than being part of society. Yes everybody has a reputation. showing up on time ro your job is part of it genius,
Same here , jealous people are vicious ! Oddly enough, in my circles nobody likes the people doing the slandering. I'm getting excited over stuff I need to be cool about. Can't wait for the karma show !
So if you qre considered disreputable, are we only given a chance to associate with other disreputable people? This seems nutty. One must reachnout to those who can forgive. The real way to regain self respect and a positive self image.
there's a bit of poetic license that the author of these videos takes when creating succinct scripts. they don't literally mean that you should only talk to disreputable people, the point is that we should rethink our notion of reputation when acting outwardly and making friends. most people wouldn't be friends with ex convicts - but this video asks the listener to challenge that notion, and with good reason.
I'm in school and a lot of girl thinks I'm a fuckboy because I used to flirt a lot and used to being overly nice. So yesterday someone asked a close female friend of mine to stay away from me as I was labelled as a fuckboy. So just came here as I was feeling like losing my self esteem. And I have completely limited myself from talking to any random girl from school.
im not even finishing reading this shut up. if its not on the media its yesterdays news. you know nothing of pain. girls at school talked some shit? find new girls. move towns. have your accusations blasted by mainstream media then you can cry me a river.
after all gone 1-acceptance2-hope3new failure freinds like us4-try again 5-stay away from overthinking cause it's my life no one can stop me from enjoying my life .and wear a cloak of sarcasm and no one can stop you.
ok Joan Jett. everybody has one. you're missing the point. a reputation is neither good nor bad its either or. its also social currency so good luck laying on the couch all day.
Lol, 'Candy floss'! XD That is so cute! I never knew it was the UK term for 'Cotton candy.' When I heard it in this video, I thought it was, like, an old-school way of saying 'sugar-coated' or something. Then, I Wiki'd it and found out what it was. I freakin' love the way the UK names/pronounces words differently than North America: it's so quaint and cute! Please, don't ever stop doing it; it makes me smile so much. :)
You be very careful. Some people their suffer from disorders far worse than alcoholism(or do others suffer from their disorder?). They quit because when drinking silences their judgment and their true personality emerges. We all have a dark side, but some have no other side, just a facade. Keep coming back. You'll see. Sorry to piss on your idealism. Mine is gone. It hurts like hell, but at least I see clearly now.
@@peculiarlittleman5303 From personal experience and from nearly everyone I know who has had both cancer And alcoholism say that alcoholism is far worse than cancer.
@@stevoplex I've heard the same from others, and don't doubt it for a second. My point is that : its important to pay attention to the people your interacting with and realize that people can be very different from what they try to be seen. AA is not an exception, though the steps are a spiritual program. Congratulations on being cancer free, and congratulations to you higher power on the grace it has bestowed to keep you sober.
I'm married 25 years and from day 1 my inlaws ruined my image and reputation in society. My MIL is a narcist and ring leader. I lived in pain, fear and embarrassment. People would mock me, humiliate me n there was nothing I could do. My husband defended me but his mother n brother never stopped. We lost all our family and friends n we have been lonely 25 years. But all we had was each other. One act of jealousy n envy can ruin once life and can cause so much of pain n suffering. I hope once day the repent for their sin and realise.
I suffered a loss of reputation at work.I had a bully for a boss,I work for a municipality with civil service rules.Bully boss didn't abide by any of the rules for promotion or training or anything else, he went by cronyism and abuse of power.If you went along with his crooked and cruel bs you moved up.If you stood up for yourself or those being singled out and bullied you were chastised and smeared.I took issue with him bullying a coworker who had a stroke and walked with a cane and a limp the boss would mock him when he left the room and I told him it wasn't cool,I also helped a female coworker file a complaint with the EEOC for getting paid much less than a male coworker. I was given the shit work, and isolated from my coworkers by being put on 3 rotations of nightshift in a row the whole time I was on night shift I was being smeared and talked down by boss to other employees.One of his cronies made up a story that I had made a threat of violence to him about bully boss.I did not.I was fired but got my job back as the Civil Service Commission did not believe the lie.However the damage was done,I dont think I will ever get my reputation back.For me,as a person who tries to live by the tenets of Buddhism, one of the hard parts is being accused of making a threat of violence.Just BS . I make good money and probably wont quit,but I have to find a new perspective to survive.Even with all that retaliation I would still standup for myself and those being bullied.It just sux and I wish it didn't have to be this way.Thanks for the rant,
Even if your reputation is only seen by 100 people, most people are uneducated so they can only see rumors and not fact. Also, make sure people don't follow you around pretending to be outsiders for the amusement of the ones who ruined your reputation to begin with
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The School of Life thank you for this video so much!
Can barely hear you, mate, had to turn it up 4 notches above my normal level. Call me a boomer, go ahead lol
Great vid otherwise!
I like the videos, but I hate title translation.
_ex cons & animals ! .. heh heh .. cracking good text/edit there man_ ;]
Hey boss, it's hard to hear your voice clearly over the background music in this one.
It wasn’t until I was abandoned by everyone that I realized how powerful one person can be.
✌️❤️
Same here
same here, i'm sure we'd have some interesting conversations based on our solo journeys.
Same here
That's bullshit. It's impossible to lose literally everyone. And if you did, maybe it is because you are a despicable person
same
"With enough courage you can do without a reputation."
- Rhett Butler
Emphasis on the word 'Courage'. 6/2019
this gives me so much hope!
Your reputation is simply what people think of you. How you gonna get people to stop thinking?
True, you better have a LOT OF courage, if you have any value !
So many narcissists and evil spirits who thrive by making up cheap libel against their fellowmen !
I'll think about that Tomorrow
*It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to ruin it. If you think about that, you'll do things differently.* - Warren Buffet
That's sad :(
No matter what person you are.
@@RPMcM09 no, we are social creatures
Reputation is more key to those in a limelight
Yeah, what I will do differently is not try to establish one in the first place.
It's really a shame that a reputation can be ruined by some rumours spread by haters.
But then again, we just have to just use it to our advantage and push forward.
The advantage is, you'll know who the people are around you.
The people who love us stay.
And the fake people get highlighted, fake a smile to them and stay away from them.
Don't let those who want to bring you down in your circle.
Keep the ones who always believed in you.
And when you do finally come out to be a great human being, always remember those who stood by you.
❤❤❤
I suffred loss of reputation when I was imprisoned for one year, I lost almost all of my friends, my job, it was pretty much like walking naked down the street, painful and lonely it is, even though its getting better now, but the matter of freedom it brought to me was enormous, everyone now saw me for who I really am and they have the choice whether to leave or stay I don't really care anymore
Mohammed Bedewy
Well done for the good progress.
Same thing happened to me, it ruins current and future relationships due to what people perceive you as. Eventually and gratefully we learn to get used to it and move on and whether people wanna be apart of our lives or not is solely out of our control.
Sometimes you lose your reputation because you stood up and took an unpopular position, because you believed it was the right thing to do. If this happens to you, be assured: the ancient Greeks considered this courageous and an important act for civic life.
Exactly. Especially if you were innocent, or endured instutional betrayal or religious persecution etc. I feel too scared to attempt to share or be heard anymore and instead called crazy or a liar.
@@leahc9695 Its funny when you think outside the box and want to express your truths. But do be labeled as crazy. When you just no longer want to be a sheep in this society. So it's like a choice either go with the masses or be labeled as an outcast.
@@10RBREEZY deep
I've done that. Now everyone thinks I'm "super evil far right" monster just because I took a position saying I don't want my people to be ethnically replaced. How ironic, I'm advocating for their wellbeing and survival and they return the favor with malice because everyday the media they consume tells them "people like me" are bad. They can't see beyond the label others have attributed to folks like me, they can't see that I'm genuinely concerned for them and their future. They believe I'm motivated by hate because the media says so but how could loving your people be hate? Wanting what's good for your people, wanting them to survive is hate just because a person working in a publishing institution said so? Brainwashing is very real indeed.
Don’t let yourself confuse ego for reputation.
*Reputation is how others see you.*
*Ego is your own self-importance.*
Reputation is a hard currency, hard to get it and easy to lose it
Actually not in the age of social media. Look at the dipshits that call themselves influencers, they are, statistically, supremely admired.
yup, esp when you prove to your co workers that you will sell them out... they will never trust you again...
I think it is the other way around. Reputation is easy to get and hard to lose. There is a different version of you in the minds of everyone who knows you. It is how they perceive you. To a point, they control it, not you. To change that you have to do something that they perceive as extraordinarily good, extraordinarily bad or in direct opposition to what they think of you.
Pina Colada Sipping MGTOW so if i made a gap year at the first year of medical university bcs my parents abused me and at the end made me do it,i put my studies in the state of stillnes from psychiatrists ,made a gap year,didn’t lost the buget ,i still don’t have to pay anything bcs i didn’t renew the year i took a gap year, and i got back after one year,i didn’t even go the year i got accepted,just one month but i had to sell some other story to people so i said i am trying to go to a even better university,i couldn’t tell my parents are retarded and they ruined my life from the moment i was born ,do u believe if i prove that this knowledge that i want for myself anyway but with the top score since that matters..i can still like prove them that i am still the same or better..when we all prepared the exam for uni and i did it for three months i started in the last momt,and they did it like whole school year ,they admired me xd do u think i can rebuild my reputation?...i have no problem with people in my year they respect me and appreciate me but other people from the past i am not sure what kind a person i am now to them..or i should just keep going with ignoring what they think bcs i never cared since i never had a problem with that i was always really successful at school and everyone knows that...
Reputation can actually be the *DEATH* of someone.
If you let it.
@@joeyshabbadoo It's out of anyone's hands, you can be targeted by the unruly lynching mob just by appearance alone
TheMindofRa is that a threat?
@@joeyshabbadoo I don't think he meant that as a threat, but perhaps as a warning, from someone who wants you to be safe. And I think he's right. It's wonderful to not let bad reputation bother you on the inside. But there are still many places in the world where a bad reputation in your community will get you killed by someone (or thrown out of the community, which can also be a death sentence in some areas.) Those of us that live in safe, rich countries may see this video very differently than others might.
@@MissKellyBean Yes, if what you mean is that the herd acts in a more refined way in rich, more evolved societies. In my view its the same difference between a common criminal and a white shirt criminal.
*_With enough self-love, you can do without worrying about reputation_*
Um sometimes that goes beyond that, in order to get a house or a job etc where it goes that far as to some self love and what other people think... Your whole livelihood is often ruined. Just sayin
@@leahc9695 No. Credit is a slavery. Mortgage also. Job, if it is worthy and you doing it the best, there is bo alternative. Losing/not getting a job is sometimes a blessing in desguise.
False allegations can do so much harm. Some people think that false allegations against them can’t affect them because they think everyone knows they wouldn’t do such a thing. But that’s not the truth. All it takes is one person with the intent to lie to others about you to make you look bad and soon everyone believes that lie and no matter what you say or how much you try to prove you did nothing wrong, it won’t matter. In today’s society no one confirms for truth they just believe what they’re told and won’t believe the accused. Just love knowing that you know the truth and there are things you can do.
This is a major reason why privacy matters
I think i lost mine and its giving me a headache
Something that I heard a long time ago that always resonated with me was "if you don't like what people are saying about you, then change the conversation." Basically, if you give people something else to talk about then they will talk about something else.
lol always love a mad men fan gurl. very true tho
You make it sound like it's something bad...
"Until you've lost your reputation, you never realize what a burden it was or what freedom really is."
- Margaret Mitchell
But freedom without responsibility can kill people. Just saying.
@@BigHenFor you must read more Brooks or talk with more people about the true value of reputation as innocent actions can completely destroy it
So true!
@@MaxArturo Friends and spouses are replaceable, there's over 7 billion+ people on this planet
@@Zen-cv2eq This!
I have to admit this is painful and its scary not knowing who knows what about you and having strangers pass nasty remarks or attacking you
I feel you bro
@@ghost-xx4wvI saw a comment of yours in another video pretty much like this one. Having a hard time, huh?
You survive this by NOT caring about what other people think.
It is if the author of this video never heard of becoming a bohemian, Your Favorite Lifecoach.
Thanks for the great advice that can totally be applied to real life without major consequences
I was partly joking, and somewhat severe, SeriousShark. I have found that telling people what you really think can be the best thing even if they reject you as a result. It is better to care what you think of other people than what they think of you. It seems unlikely that we can accurately predict what others think of us because we are never free of the lens of our own perception. Do you speak from experience?
Good point. I'll start by not caring what YOU think, jerkass.
@@Nickelodeon81 Nice try, but you took the trouble to insult me. It seems like you do.
This is kind of the quandary I'm in now of tired of having to play a 'character' all day. Its exhausting trying to please everybody, much less strangers
you don't have to play a character. just sayin
Oh yo don't hace to, the only thing you have to do is do the same You do but in the appropiate moment for your society
Oh god I've been there friend
been there, am there
Can't lose what you never had in the first place.
Have someone accuse you of being a child molester and see how fast that non-reputation starts to look really good next to a bad one. We all have reputations even if you don't believe you do. It's only when someone destroys it that you realize what you truly had.
Very true
Actually your wrong. You think u right cuz you don’t know every situation that happenes to people. My best friends father killed himself just because he was accused of trying to rape his own daughter in law, while the her husband was in the orther room , in the same house. She hated living with her in-laws and , found that way to request to move out , she just jumped and came out saying that he was trying to rape her. Of course everybody believed her , and who knows how they treated him that month. He killed himslefl in about a month
@@xm377Moyocoyatzin mine was destroyed as well
@@xm377Moyocoyatzin facts
Such a good view on reputation and what it really means in society. Also, the solution for what to do if the worst case happens is so great. So true and both sad and hilarious at the same time.
I lost my reputation once cause by the people hatred with NO grounded evidences until NOW. But slowly but sure I prove them wrong and nice things in life still happen to me right now. I make them embarrased for what they thought about me, but resiliently, I show them little by little and slowly with patience to make them see that without reputation I still be just a human being who no mistake-proof, trying to be a good with just all I have. Just don’t loose faith. Somewhere someone will find the beauty inside you.
How long ago did you lose it
lost mine by just "soundly" eating my meals at pantry all my colleague started avoiding me😪😪
lost mine and went viral the whole world hates me
Also I love how you tell us that we should love other people for their humanity alone but then tell us that literally the entirety of society will hate us with no coming back if we have less than a shred of reputation. Yes, love the “people” that will relentlessly tear you apart without a second thought. That totally doesn’t make them complete utter bastards, doesn’t it?
Well the entirety of society will hate us because they dont actually know who we are and they dont care to think about us. What i got from this is that treating people with love and kindness is the only way for some of them to stop and think about you. Some of them will eventually figure out youre not that bad. By doing this at least a small amount of people will start seeing you for who you are, and that might be enough to survive the rest of society who doesnt listen
Maintaining a flawless reputation is exhausting, plus, a little bit of mischief is called Living.
That was beautiful. I Literally just had a thought about how my possibilities were limited by my percieved reputation and not my abilities. This helped, thanks
same!
It's mind blowing how another human being will ruin an innocent persons reputation by making up lies about them.
I never in my wildest dreams thought there would be people that would purposely make up stories about another person to ruin their life it's just pure evil and insecurity on a higher level.
Number one rule stay away from those who gossip and strive off of drama.
Perfectly said.
*"Your reputations precedes you"*
A man from the middle east said this is a common phrase in his country. I believe it. 💪
Black Vito - Moneyology & Philosophy *preceeds
@@emilysavage2151 my best friend sometimes used to tell me of his fustration with my propensity to include a typo in my online writings. But they dont call my the typo king👑 for nothing. I'm not the king they wanted but I'm the king they got
🎭
Isn't it "precede"?
@@ethanfernandez3395 it may be but if it is Emily is welcome to be typo queen 👑🎭
@@ethanfernandez3395 i just googled tf out of it and you sir are correct. You corrected the corrector and correctee. You are are the goat🐐
So it’s “Yup, you’re very much fucked. Learn to live with it, move out of town and make new friends, preferably losers too”
Thank you, School of Life. That’s what I needed today.
Maybe the school of life isn't the answer. You will figure it out on your own.
@@ecman324 Agreed.
Exactly my thoughts (and situation). So many unsung heroes who were falsely accused too... Dying with the pain and knowledge that they were innocent and faught for the greater good. Like my dad. It's so unfair it ends this way. And the power of greater evil win, and "karma" never comes. Yet we are fed pipe dreams that the truth always comes up. Truth is more closer to, it is what it is.
@@leahc9695 sorry about ur dad
I think its not healthy to identify with losership but those who do are very honest, went though hell and would never abandon their morals for materialistic benefit. But apparently they seem to be quite rare. There is only one person i know who truly embodies this except me and she died ;_______; I've always hoped that great people are great because of their morals but it is about popularity. I wonder if you can be great and completly stay true to your morals. What do you think?
If you're unfortunate to know a Narcissist or have one in the family, get away from them ASAP, it will save your Spirit and Reputation a lot of trouble.
Shorthand for a jerk you don’t like. Psychologizimg people is what’s in style now. Look at yourself first, ,then you’ll see how you contribute to these issues.
@@bridaw8557 I absolutely observe myself FIRST, you don't know me... try that with someone else.
@@tooakki You both are right actually.The reality is very situation specific
Once, I moved my family of 5 out of our home country because of a loss of reputation. It was devastating. Now I watch back with tea and popcorn at the implosion. It wasn't us. It wasn't them. It was a culture that never solidified before the money took hold. Good luck to you, folks. We're hoping for luck here too.
Kartoffel Pommes
glad your ok
What a beautiful video; the music, the footage, the calm voice. You made my day, School of Life
Leon Verbakel rustic does not mean ‘rustig’ ;)
@@Myacckt oof dan maar snel veranderen, bedankt! ;)
Leon Verbakel 🤗😅 haha sorry hoor
I desperately needed this. A couple of months ago I left a particular group because I hold slightly different values to them. I am now, I suspect, a pariah. Yet I keep thinking that the only thing worse than them all hating me would be them all still liking me. As that would mean not being true to myself. Luckily I have people who do love me.
NB For Alain: *some* fallen politicians are scoundrels.
dude if its not on the internet forever you can literally shut the fuck up and find new friends cry me a river
I too left a group of friends, among them, my best friend. I initially ghosted, but a couple of months after, I sent her a letter apologizing for the abrupt ending, and wishing her the best. I didn't explained the details of the ending of the friendship , but I left because she was always projecting her insecurities on me (that were NOT caused by me), and lashing out at me for that same reason. I never defended myself, I never set boundaries, I was for many years a people pleaser and a doormat.
After leaving that friendship she destroyed my whole reputation, created a lot of gossip with professors from the university I went to for undergrad. Those professors don't want to have anything to do with me now. One of them was the most important professor of my entire career. My ex best friend basically destroyed me, and isolated me from almost everyone I knew from my undergrad program. It feels very unfair, and nobody cared to know about my version of the story. I have been my own support system since two years ago. I admire the people how have gone through this.
*Be nice to everyone, offer a listening ear and show them that you care. It will be a long process but you will get there!*
I don't think so, maybe in developed societies. In the mayority of the world ir isnt like that
Even in developed societies, "be nice to everyone, offer a listening ear" and they'll use you, disrespect you and then throw you out once your usefulness is over.
I’ve stumbled upon your videos through my recommendations. Every time one came up, I felt drawn in by the relevant title. These videos have such a balance, they’re succinct and easy to understand. I was originally skeptical, thinking, “well here’s another wellness channel.”
But this content is of such value and high quality, I have difficulty expressing my appreciation without writing a novel. I wish I was your friend! Thank you so much for everything you’ve created.
*Reputation: A lifetime to build, a blink of an eye to destroy*
That's why it is so stupid to worry about. Now to take my own advice.
Yours was just destroyed by posting cringey phrases that vaguely apply to everything
if 'reputation' can be ruined in a second, then it is not worthy to be worried for a lifetime. make your own' reputation' (by being kind and being yourself) and it will stay for a lifetime.
Forgiveness is probably the strongest beauty I've ever experienced in my life.
There is nothing which ruins the reputation, the psyche and the life of an individual faster than having any type of Autism. Asperger's is the worst condition. Being intelligent, creative, caring, hard-working, diligent, talented, helpful, an introvert but lacking in social skills feels like a death sentence and a constant torment. The person only lives halfway in this world and since the brain is totally unique it's almost impossible to properly connect with others.
When you start having trust in life again everything can become good again.
Vaul, Dog Warrior
this sounds promising thankfully
A reputation is a public property, and accordingly out of your control. You have to be aware of its pros and cons. As social currency, it makes life easier but, it shouldn't be seen as a measure of your self-worth. The wisdom of crowds has its limits just ask a lemming.
This is exactly what I needed right now
I've been dealing with this off and on for about 15 years and it's awful to hear 3rd or 4th hand knowing that a lot of people who don't know you very well have a negative view of you. I haven't ever been able to completely forget what people say about me and it's a helpless feeling knowing you can't change their minds. Especially if you don't even know who is spreading the rumors. It's also especially hard when you're well known in your town in general. Add to that I have an older brother who is also well known and well liked in town. He's seen as an angel but the cost of that to me has never been worth it because he is viewed that way because he sacrifices his time and emotionally energy to be loved by everyone and I speak my mind more than he does and I'm "prickly" as I've been told. If I'm in a bad mood I don't hide it as well and I may seem uninterested in what someone is talking to me about. I won't small talk as well as my brother and so people think I'm an asshole, or cocky or.... Little do they know their negative views of me hurt me a lot. I feel like it's too late to change anyone's mind so I feel at a loss. I've also had women say, oh I heard you were a player which is the male equivalent to me telling a girl I heard you were a slut and that has always bothered me the most. Full disclosure but I do love women and I have been intimate with a lot of women over the years and I have not been dishonest with them or made promises to them so that I could sleep with them but if they sleep with me or get feelings for me and I'm not interested in being in a relationship with them then I'm automatically a player. As I've gotten older it's affected my ability to be intimate with people. I get a lot of anxiety when I go to public places where there will be a lot of people who "know" me or think they know me. I feel very shy and uncomfortable around acquaintances because they are most likely to be the people who have heard negative opinions or gossip about me. It makes me want to move and start over.
God is with us.
This will happen often if you are around narcissists...
More often, it's because you're doing something wrong.
Abdalla Babikir it’s clear that you haven’t met someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
My brother has that...
Trust me I feel you ❤️
I still believe our actions can change a narcissist
Ex convicts are a great idea 😂 - come to Australia - we’ve got loads of
Them. We don’t worry too much about reputation here. Keep ya self tidy and you’ll be fine.
Today's newspaper, tomorrows toilet paper. Some school friend told me in high school
Thank you.
My reputation was lost by jealousy and moving to a new state, NOT by what I had done. And even after proving I was innocent, it didn’t matter. I was still someone new who was a pariah and shamed the community for misjudging. I still had to move.
I don't really care about my reputation because someone out there will always hate me why should I be concerned how others think of me ? You can do everything good and someone will still hate you. Just respect life and life will reward you.
you're high
wait how did you know my current need?!! 😮
Me too! It's kinda creepy how it ended up in my recommendations. Maybe we're just noticing the things we want to see.
Your smartphone has ears, my friend...
From your internet searches...?
You are who you are. and in reality you live in a society that is why you will always have a reputation, whether good or bad, which will be granted by others, not by you. You only have the choice to be who you are. There's no escape.
*_A practical guide for James Charles._*
And Jaclyn Hill
He's already back on top boo. X
And Jaclyn Hill
MUT hEs AlReAdY bAcK oN tOp BoO 🤪
🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
Lady.Whatever Lmao.
Its so fascinating how my youtube recommendations consists of these wondrous channels, school of life, pursuit of wonder, and Sadghuru!!! Ahhhh youtube youre my life medicine!
Thank you school of life! I really needed to watch this video because you've described my situation perfectly and helped me accept all the things that i should. Thank you once again!
accept eternal damnation and just making friends with animals? ok dude im right there with ya pal super excited
Thanks for these videos. They're very often a source of inspiration and reflection. From my experience I think that an important distinction has been elided in the video. It's still a helpful video, but here's the deal for me. A person can lose their reputation, in addition to doing some obvious wrongs. A person can also lose reputation and experience shame and isolation and 'dark thoughts' as a result of doing the right thing. Doing what you know to be right on most levels, but to still be regarded as a pariah to others. For example, leaving a narc / abusive relationship. Or otherwise standing up for yourself against others who may be manipulating, controlling or otherwise hurtful and so on. That's all. The message is still helpful, but I wish there would be more thought to more variety as to situational circumstances and moral judgements. Thanks for reading and have a lovely week!
We are all social creatures so reputations are important. That's why we care what our friends think of us and why we put effort into relationships. I think it can be easily confused with craving applause, which has more to do with craving attention and anti-social degrees of competitiveness. Reputations represent the inherently fragile reality of human connection. E.g. Are we thoughtful, empathetic, responsible etc? Do we give as well as take? These are pro-social qualities and how our reputations (standings) rise and fall. Groups reward those that improve the group's well-being and punish those that jeopardise it.
well, were you popular at school? I wasnt, and got snubbed at all levels for years and years. Not everyone was unkind, got a chance of a trade apprenticeship because the other workers thought me to be ok. I tend to pass on any chances to 'losers' if at all possible. The more popular people in society are scared of losing credibility/status, when the truth is...is we all bite the dust at some point in our lives. Be who you are, if you got some close friends who might correct you at times, listen to them and take a look at yourself because they could well be right. Most people have a certain amount of give and take. I think the most tragic is when you get your reputation ruined from people telling lies. Try living in a small town, in a small country where there is no escape whatsoever. Its not fun.
This is a very relevant topic these days, when all around us prominent people are loosing their reputation & careers for alleged sexual misconduct.
what if we all learned to empathize and not judge like those who have lost reputations
I can't be more proud of not having any reputation. I managed to get rid of all those unworthy around me.
you have no understanding of this life. you do have a reputation. even those you deem worthy deem YOU worthy for certain reason bro. even if your the butt of every joke. THATS your reputation. wether you like it or not.
I am a young guy in school . About a year ago, I offended someone and they spread a rumor that I was addicted to porn and that I was a pedophile. Because of this rumor, I have had my reputation impact it to a horrible degree. I don’t even know how to come back from that type of thing now all the girls at school avoid me and think that I look at them. I don’t even know what to do anymore. If I’m trying to defend myself, everyone assumes it’s just a lie. And the rumors just keep on building up. 😢
If there is no factual value to the rumors, prevent yourself from attaching any value whatsoever to them in the first place. (I use the word 'prevent' because it is something we seem to do without prior thinking.)
With this right frame of mind, you should be able to maintain composure - not getting angry and agitated - so that your ability to remain focused on simply getting things done and not making debilitating mistakes is not severely undermined; and to conjure the will to rebuild/restore what has been lost in even a better way than before.
This'll take time, buddy, so please be patient on your demanding-but-eventually-rewarding journey.
We can forgive ourselves and each other- after taking full responsibility and seeing where the mistakes are coming from. We all deserve love. Those who don't come from a place of understanding upon seeing one's position is not worth your time (they're on their ego trip). We are humans with errors- but the error mustn't be repeated if you are compassionate to yourself.
Gotta say, it's nice to not care about reputation. It is awful, however, when someone you know who said they loved you suddenly turns and makes intentional steps to sabotage your reputation... It's not so much that I care to be popular... It would just be nice to be at peace knowing that I can mind my own business and not be bothered.
I lost a parent to suicide and this has ruined my reputation.
I was unaware of stigmas and too traumatised to act in appropriate ways or realise I should hide the situation. 💔
Jesus I'm so sorry that it affected you this way. You did nothing wrong. That's so crazy
@ thank you. It’s a big shock
How to start again when the internet remembers you forever ? It's impossible. You're one search away from a reminder of your mistakes. They won't allow you to grow or change. The internet is one big chain around the individual forcing him to be forever connected to others, it's sickening.
how this doesn't have more likes is scary, how oblivious some of these people are. Everyone thinks they're immune till the most wild shit gets made up about you and put on reddit, and even more, like me...written by the media as a public figure.
yep.This is the issue. The only way I've come to deal is self-talk throughout the entire day when I'm out. Constantly telling myself I'm okay until I get home. It's so exhausting. I'm not that person.
Why am I watching this video when I don't have a reputation to begin with...🤔
WTF! at the moment I am being sued for libel (after defaming someone on facebook, in support of another person). And despite being a revered and good member of my community, I feel like such a pariah right now when my case went public. I'm still waiting for my court date (for amicable settlement) but still, i feel like a nobody. I want to hide from everyone else. Thank God the internet exists because it's my refuge right now. This video could not be more on time
This is why I don't have FB. It's nothing but trouble.
What ended up happening? I’m in a similar place
GOOD DONT TALK SHIT. ITS PEOPLE LIKE YOU THAT CHIME IN AND RUIN PEOPLE OVER NIGHT. LEAVE IT. I HOPE YOU GOT SUED TO THE MOON AND BACK. I WAS RUINED FOR NOT JUST THE PERSON THAT MADE A SOCIAL MEDIA LIES BUT THE SPREADERS OF THE LIE. THE SHEEP. YOU. AND YOU COMPLAIN??????!!!!!!
I think the reason most people disagree with this video is because it's hurtfully true.
There are only very specific cases when one can go back to the way things were, but truth be said they never can be in most cases.
The only thing one can do is accept the situation and realise the ones who are true to you, that's when you'll come to see that the ostracism from the exhausting areas of the society can prove to be healthy.
Finally someone said it 👏🏻
Most people in the world believe that God exists. For those of us who trust in God, we can overcome a bad reputation by asking forgiveness, trusting him to help, and feeling his support. He will show us exactly what to do to fix a reputation
Even if you seek attention in order to rebuild your reputation?
People been lying on me for years now, just keep moving that's my way.
It was 5 years ago for me, one lie destroyed me at the peak of my career, which i also loved. i still struggle with getting emotionally invested in anything or anyone. I do the things. But i cant summon the naivete that seems to be necessary to feel hope.
@Rh-bk8pu thankyou ✨
Because of O.C.D. and anxiety problems, everybody thinks I'm a freak. There are people at work who walk by me like I'm not even there if I say hello to them. People I havn't seen in years, will say things like "I heard you went crazy"or they'll "look" at me in a certain way while they're talking to me. So, this is apparantly my new reputation.There was a time when making friends came so easy to me. I don't think I really appreciated it. I hope I come out the other side of this a better person. #mentalillnesssucks
Seek true friends
Especially if you are a man. I deal with the same struggle. Hope you will find your way.
I feel like the idea of a reputation is foreign to me, sounds like something people worried about in the 60s. It must be that the society I live in has gone beyond this idea, or that I'm so socially unaware so as to never have had a reputation. Either way I'm grateful, maintaining a reputation sounds like a pain the ass.
The idea that a reputation is a pain is forgetting that your reputation is your social currency, and when you rely on the regard of others to function effectively in your community - which we all do - then then you realise the value of reputation. Trust is earned. If you want the benefits of being trusted, you have to look after it. Once lost, it can be regained, but not without cost.
maya moon well having sex with (maybe) strangers, that everyone can see, as your job is also a crazy choice to make when there are so many other jobs you could've choosen. I mean, you should've seen what was coming by choosing that job in the adult industry.
you sound just retarded, and tbh that's probably easier than being part of society. Yes everybody has a reputation. showing up on time ro your job is part of it genius,
you should've included something specific about slander and character assignation.
I'm going through that right now, would have loved something speciic about that as well.
Same here , jealous people are vicious ! Oddly enough, in my circles nobody likes the people doing the slandering. I'm getting excited over stuff I need to be cool about. Can't wait for the karma show !
@@racerx5379 Karma is a made up, stupid concept.
@@sarah18497 well Sarah if thats the way you feel then ....youre right of course.
So if you qre considered disreputable, are we only given a chance to associate with other disreputable people? This seems nutty. One must reachnout to those who can forgive. The real way to regain self respect and a positive self image.
there's a bit of poetic license that the author of these videos takes when creating succinct scripts. they don't literally mean that you should only talk to disreputable people, the point is that we should rethink our notion of reputation when acting outwardly and making friends. most people wouldn't be friends with ex convicts - but this video asks the listener to challenge that notion, and with good reason.
This is very insightful. Thank you.
I'm in school and a lot of girl thinks I'm a fuckboy because I used to flirt a lot and used to being overly nice. So yesterday someone asked a close female friend of mine to stay away from me as I was labelled as a fuckboy. So just came here as I was feeling like losing my self esteem. And I have completely limited myself from talking to any random girl from school.
im not even finishing reading this shut up. if its not on the media its yesterdays news. you know nothing of pain. girls at school talked some shit? find new girls. move towns. have your accusations blasted by mainstream media then you can cry me a river.
nobody is safe. nobody. HEATH MY WORDS. the internet is the antichrist.
Quick version:
Hire Taylor Swift’s marketing team.
I- true 💀
This was so enlightening
after all gone 1-acceptance2-hope3new failure freinds like us4-try again 5-stay away from overthinking cause it's my life no one can stop me from enjoying my life .and wear a cloak of sarcasm and no one can stop you.
Well I'm not afraid of losing my reputation cos I never even had one in the first place😏
The reputation for pineapples on pizza is very controversial depending on who you ask
You could still gain a bad reputation. And I don't mean "bad" in a cool way.
Yeah bad reputation is very easy to win, Even more in times of social media
But I love you pineapple pizza lol
ok Joan Jett. everybody has one. you're missing the point. a reputation is neither good nor bad its either or. its also social currency so good luck laying on the couch all day.
Too long since we had a melody with our andragogy! Fantastic! Oh it's the teaching and instruction of adult learners.
Who needs therapy when you have this channel
The School of Life, please make a video about financial conflicts in a relationship.
This is oddly comforting
Screw reputation. Subjectivity at its finest.
This video made me *ring the bell.* This would help me greatly in healing our clientele-- Persons Deprived of Liberty.
how is this helpful? make friends with convicts and dogs? the only hope for loss of reputation is to wait on a miracle
Insightful
Answer starts at 7:00
Hold my like :)
Thank you! It says something I want to discover and give a frame!
Amazing topic and perspective. Thank you very much
Lol, 'Candy floss'! XD That is so cute! I never knew it was the UK term for 'Cotton candy.' When I heard it in this video, I thought it was, like, an old-school way of saying 'sugar-coated' or something. Then, I Wiki'd it and found out what it was. I freakin' love the way the UK names/pronounces words differently than North America: it's so quaint and cute! Please, don't ever stop doing it; it makes me smile so much. :)
Alcoholics Anonymous is a great Community for those who have trashed their own reputation by catastrophic drinking.
You be very careful. Some people their suffer from disorders far worse than alcoholism(or do others suffer from their disorder?). They quit because when drinking silences their judgment and their true personality emerges. We all have a dark side, but some have no other side, just a facade. Keep coming back. You'll see. Sorry to piss on your idealism. Mine is gone. It hurts like hell, but at least I see clearly now.
@@peculiarlittleman5303 From personal experience and from nearly everyone I know who has had both cancer And alcoholism say that alcoholism is far worse than cancer.
@@stevoplex I've heard the same from others, and don't doubt it for a second. My point is that : its important to pay attention to the people your interacting with and realize that people can be very different from what they try to be seen. AA is not an exception, though the steps are a spiritual program. Congratulations on being cancer free, and congratulations to you higher power on the grace it has bestowed to keep you sober.
@@peculiarlittleman5303 Thank you. God bless you and yours.
Notice how the footage is from the good-ld-days before social media took a huge chunk of our character.
I'm married 25 years and from day 1 my inlaws ruined my image and reputation in society. My MIL is a narcist and ring leader. I lived in pain, fear and embarrassment. People would mock me, humiliate me n there was nothing I could do. My husband defended me but his mother n brother never stopped. We lost all our family and friends n we have been lonely 25 years. But all we had was each other. One act of jealousy n envy can ruin once life and can cause so much of pain n suffering. I hope once day the repent for their sin and realise.
Thank you for this education.
"I have a HORRIBLE reputation and not a single fuck to give." ~Eugene Murphy
I suffered a loss of reputation at work.I had a bully for a boss,I work for a municipality with civil service rules.Bully boss didn't abide by any of the rules for promotion or training or anything else, he went by cronyism and abuse of power.If you went along with his crooked and cruel bs you moved up.If you stood up for yourself or those being singled out and bullied you were chastised and smeared.I took issue with him bullying a coworker who had a stroke and walked with a cane and a limp the boss would mock him when he left the room and I told him it wasn't cool,I also helped a female coworker file a complaint with the EEOC for getting paid much less than a male coworker. I was given the shit work, and isolated from my coworkers by being put on 3 rotations of nightshift in a row the whole time I was on night shift I was being smeared and talked down by boss to other employees.One of his cronies made up a story that I had made a threat of violence to him about bully boss.I did not.I was fired but got my job back as the Civil Service Commission did not believe the lie.However the damage was done,I dont think I will ever get my reputation back.For me,as a person who tries to live by the tenets of Buddhism, one of the hard parts is being accused of making a threat of violence.Just BS . I make good money and probably wont quit,but I have to find a new perspective to survive.Even with all that retaliation I would still standup for myself and those being bullied.It just sux and I wish it didn't have to be this way.Thanks for the rant,
upaiaq
Well done for handling it
I am going to deliberately plan my downfall/ loss of reputation😭, trying to release shame and be mentally free😻✵
YOLO😎
What
oh dude come right in to the suicide club you privelidged ass!!
read a book by Max Lucado called you are special. It's about a little girl who lives without a reputation.
Even if your reputation is only seen by 100 people, most people are uneducated so they can only see rumors and not fact.
Also, make sure people don't follow you around pretending to be outsiders for the amusement of the ones who ruined your reputation to begin with
Informative..Nice🤓😄
Sincerity & vulnerability...Yes...
Jeez, it’s like you predicted that I needed this. >_>