Daughter of Drug Addicted Parents-October
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 2 มิ.ย. 2023
- Soft White Underbelly interview and portrait of October, the daughter of drug addicted parents.
Here's a link to a GoFundMe campaign to help some of the people seen in SWU interviews: gofund.me/9ebad507
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Thank you so much Mark for giving me this opportunity to speak about my parents and my story. And thank you all for the kind and supportive comments it really means a lot to me❤️
Your story touched me love
Hi October. Thank you very much for sharing with us. I know you will be just fine, no doubt. Be proud of yourself! ❤ And yes, no rush!
Please stay strong through Father's day coming up. I still don't know whether or not to celebrate it or not after years of contemplation. I miss him and hate him and love him at the same time... ♡😞
Ur such an inspiration n such an amazing person.. so many ppl go thru hard times during childhood.. perfect example of what strength n hope can get u thru.. God bless, ur gonna do great things in life
October - I’d just like to thank you so much for sharing your story. Your a phenomenal young lady that will no dubt go far in life !!!
I’m interested to know if you do or tried tattooing yourself ? Anyways I wish you nothing but the best of luck !!! 👍❤️💪
Holy shit. Her father was my tattoo artist. He did a piece on my elbow the day before he died. I was the last person he inked. God bless you, October. You look just like your mother. There's hundreds and hundreds of people here in Tennessee that love you and wish the best for you, even though we will never know you.
There's a 5 minute video on TH-cam of their wedding. Eerie to watch. She does look like her, beautiful
@Lisa Sposato what's the title of the video?
@@lisapizza6494 They were so proud of this girl. They'd be proud now too, seeing her tell their story with such tragic honesty. I can't finish this video without crying.
@@marinae1495La la + Shane the channel name is digitalwedding
@@duggadugga6435❤
This girl's going to be all right. You can see the strength in her.
She's one hell of a chick! Respect
Not necessarily
I would bet my life on it she will not be alright. Far from it. This is a future disaster
@@user-ub5qp8sq1wwhy would you say something so disrespectful? Why would you not encourage someone who has gone through so many hardships. I hope you find healing. No need to speak poorly on people you don’t know
I am age 73.
My mother passed a few months ago at the age of 93.
All I felt was relief. I don't have to deal with any parent mental health, and addiction issues ever again!
73 years is a long time.
That IS a long time. My father wasn't an addict, but mentally ill, refused treatment. I totally get the lift of stress from having to deal with it, though I loved him so much.
The way she speaks about her parents says a lot. She told her story so non-judgmentally. She doesn’t mention ever feeling unloved or being abused, just explains what happened.
I’ve heard many stories similar to hers, but never told in this way.
Because she felt love despite her parents issues. Some parents can be abusive .
In the third person she tells her story !!!
She’s so beautiful outside and inside !!
Thank you that really means a lot
Some parents just purposely want to make their children feel like shit and hurt them . These parents didn’t
non-judgmental? her mother gets sick and gains weight and they fat shame her? I don't call that non-judgmental. at the very least, it's shallow. sometimes a little empathy can go a long way.
How she went through all that and came out in one piece is beyond me. She's amazingly strong.
There are many of us that went through things like that, it is not rare never has been people just do not talk about it.Also we all do not turn out bad ,need life long therapy etc i know i lived it and am fine no worse for wear !
And she does not have a tattoo👏🏼
@@andrewslagle1974 that’s why Mark is one of the greatest. He keep showing this people’s stories which are not talked enough. All people that went through this type of childhood are very strong,wish you all the best because you deserve it!❤️
Nah man, she is coping hard, but you missed the part where she says that she cannot plan for the future because she doesn't have the strength to do it anymore. That's the reason why she is living paycheck to paycheck. She lost her dreams and her drive since the reason was to make her parents proud of her.
@@evalangley3985you know it’s not a bad thing that her aspirations don’t look like everyone else’s. Seems like she’s taking her life one day at a time which is fine because she’s like 20… we’re here to listen to her story and take in what she learned from her experience. She sounds like she’s got great character and one can only pray she’s protected in life. We’re all coping with something cause life is scary and traumatizing
My mind is blown at how this young woman managed to keep herself so strong and focused while being surrounded by unbelievable family turmoil. October, your intelligence and your spirit are immeasurable. The best is yet to come for you. Love and power!
This old soul has lived a thousand lives! She's an absolute emotional force to reckoned with. All odds stacked against her and yet shows the deepest grace!
Omg! You're freaking' awesome! I just have to say that first!
I'm so sorry for you're loss...
You're nothing more than a survival story! I see you helping so many because of your complete honesty!
This is happening all over! Fentanyl and alcohol can kill!
Hate the addiction, not the addict! ❤😢
A thousand lives? Maybe you might think she feels that way. Maybe she feels that way. Or maybe it's just you. However, it doesn't mean she's lived 'a thousand lives'. She's living one life. And it's the only one she'll have. Just like the rest of us.
@@brucemacmillan9581 It's a metaphor.
@@janetwalker587 Fair enough for you. But did you ask mirandamk1 if she thinks it's only a metaphor? Believing in such ideas literally is kinda dumb. And some people do. Maybe Ms. Miranda does too.
@@brucemacmillan9581 Thats literally your opinion. You have no proof we only have one life, or what happens when you die. You have ZERO proof of anything beyond death, or pre birth.
It’s amazing she actually said “my parents are great parents” after what can only be described as absolute hell for a child to grow through. Wish her nothing but the best
Love is unconditional
I have noticed a pattern of the children adult or younger always say how great their parents were/are when it’s clear how horrific the parents actually were…
They loved her and she knew they loved her
she was loved and cared for at an early age. that's why
She's the only one to judge....you can not in fact say whether her childhood was good or bad jeez
“It’s easy to compare yourself to other people’s paths, but when you have been through a narrow path with tons of shit in the way, it’s okay to take it slow”🥺 really needed to hear this. Thank you beautiful October✨
Yes day by day. One step at a time.
This is a woman who was dealt the worst hand and turned it into a winning hand. Too often we hear these stories and aren't surprised that people turn out for the worst. October is living proof of how you cannot control your environment, but control how you react to it. Amazing person!
She tells it with the acuity of a professor, the honesty of a saint, and the innocence of a child.
October is showing us what resilience looks like, and how it is the key to overcoming trauma. She is a powerful example of this. Her story, as rough as it truly is, makes her stronger as it fails to undo her.
Perfect description of her ❤
Perfectly stated.
1000%
absolutely perfectly said!
Beautifully said, your comment is so accurate it gave me goosebumps.
This interview ran over an hour so I was gonna watch only a few minutes but I couldn’t stop. October, you have such grace, intelligence and beauty despite all the family turmoil. I hope that from now on you’re able to make the satisfying, no-drama life that you so richly deserve.
It totally felt like 10 minutes to me I was so engaged in her story. I hope she had a wonderful life, she has the tools
How is it that some comments that talk of abuse and such get majority likes/agreeing comments when clearly this person needs to look to the future and told of her strengths?
Your comment is insightful, compassionate, empathetic and pot on
Love and Grace
I live in Kentucky as her sister did, and I guess she was there a lot as well. I have been in Tenneessee MANY times, as they border each other and I live in the mountains in Hazard. I know what you mean !! I was also going to watch just a few mins and watch the rest tomorrow, but I had to watch it all!
What i admire about October, she never once played the victim card. Nothing but unwavering love for her parents. She is such an emotionally mature woman. Beautiful she is ❤
The “victim card” doesn’t exist. Especially if you are the victim.
I am a 52 year old woman with significant childhood trauma that carried on throughout my 20s and 30s, and into my 40s.
After listening to October, I just wish that I had her in my life, even on the peripheral. Her articulation and even storytelling are helping me to stop and deconstruct everything I’ve been through. She is truly brilliant.
We really didn't have that language back then. She is articulate.
Bless her journey ❤
Wow. What a woman, what a story. October is a diamond -- created from intense pressure, tough, lasting, and gorgeous. She deserves so much happiness.
Oh what a beautiful way to describe her! I agree my friend. She is incredible and precious! What an inspiration! Bless her 💜.
Why does she deserve so much happiness as oppose to anyone else on this channel?
@@openmike4559 Where did I say that?
@@openmike4559because she has self control 😂.
What a beautiful comparison ❤
the compassion and understanding with which she speaks about her parents says everything about her character. october, you can do anything 🧡🦋🌻
ps, if you have no desire to have a partner that's valid. but if you ever do, remember this: "we accept the love we think we deserve." don't ever think you deserve anything less than healthy, compassionate love. be well, girlie 💖
This is the best comment I’ve seen🤍🤍
She recognizes unhealthy familial patterns and chooses to not repeat them. I adore her - blessed & special.
well said - so true
Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!
Yes, dr.sporesss. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
I wish they were readily available in my place.
Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He is 59 & has so many mental health issues plus probable CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac.
He's constantly talking about killing someone.
He's violent. Anyone reading this Familiar w/ BPD know if it is common for an obsession with violence.
Is he on instagram?
Yes he is. dr.sporesss
I lost my dad in November 2022 from a fentanyl overdose. It definitely has changed my life. You are so strong thank you for telling your story ❤
❤❤❤
I would love a follow-up interview with her in like a year to see her progression. What a strong and gracious young woman. October, you deserve the very best! 💜
She has a TH-cam channel
she's such a hero for being a whole parent for her own parents, especially her dad, while getting a degree in science, i have no idea how she managed to keep a clear mind through this
Thank you❤
@@octoberhartline4849 stay strong 💘
It sounds like October focused on her studies as a kind of coping mechanism. I did the same as I had a similar upbringing (just not as bohemian). And it was the right choice. Don't turn to drugs and self-harm people; bury yourself in those books and it will give you opportunities you never thought possible. I hope October pursues her studies again the future. The sky's the limit for her!
A lot of us have
Its tragic. Her life took a complete 360 from having the most best fun childhood to a complete nightmare. Addiction changes people to where they are unrecognizable. My heart aches for her.
Think you mean 180. A 360 would bring her back to where she started lol
@@user-mp2lg6nz1rLMFAO 😂yeah, almost best fun childhood - to a (completed circle) most best fun adulthood! with "Zacko Wilde" no-less.😊
Man, she is wise beyond her years. Reminds me of my daughter. I pray you don't have to spend the majority of your young adult life recovering from your childhood.
pray? i also wish cthulu will back her up in her endeavours
I get the feeling she'll go on to do great things with her life, doing it at her own pace.
Thank you so much this means a lot to me
When she said the part about her dad passing and how, i immediately started crying. Her parents obviously loved her so much but they had deep issues within themselves, as she said. Addiction is such a heartbreaking thing to go through and she is very strong for continuing to go on and not falling down the same path. RIP, they seemed like wonderful people who were tormented by addiction.
The addiction is rarely, if ever, that which torments. It's the individuals and community members that cause all the torment. With a closer look, you may end up noticing that everyone and every single creature is an addict, by edict, and brought forth by the creators of this world.
October, I am so sorry. I am so sorry for the ragged, crazy-making, scary, frustrating, sorrow-filled path you have traveled as a child of two addicted parents. Very unfair. You are amazing and resilient. It is not the same, but my brother died of the same disease as your mom and it was hell, but he was not someone whom I needed to take care of me. I can’t imagine your frustration, pain, confusion, anxiety, hope, despair….You would make an awesome counselor for those with AODA addictions. You are such a blessing to the world!
Go look up "Lala + Shane" by Digital Wedding and you can watch her parents' wedding day.
October !!!!!!! You are a role model to anyone going through trauma and hardship. Bless you girl!
Wow. She is the very definition of emotional maturity. I’m blown away by this young lady. She had to be the calm in a frazzled, consistently erratic tornado. I’m so grateful I stopped by to listen to her story. Mind blowing.
Its good that she can talk about this stuff. Shes young. As you get older that internalized childhood stuff starts bubbling to the surface in odd ways: trauma, resentment, confusion, fear, anger....you think youre free at adulthood to create your own safe reality but oh no, the trauma follows you around. Talking about it helps most people, gotta keep that level head. Its work.
Yes and it comes out in your relationships also.
Yeah, I've known people who think all's fine until they hit 50, give or take. Then something causes a breakdown. It's dealt with for the first time on a felt level.
Yeah it’s going to surface in a relationship. I pray she get the help she needs 😢
💯
Omg yes
I cannot imagine going through all that she did at such a young age…. You are a true warrior.
"I have to start all the way over" the feeling of being constantly burnt out from living in the hell of a family affected by alcoholism is indescribable. Everything becomes so difficult, even the simplest things. And there is no escape. I have to start all the way over EVERY f@cking day of my life. October, thank you so much for sharing your story.
This young lady’s a class act, if she chooses to continue sharing her story she will help a lot of people.
I can't imagine what it is like going from full-time trauma and worry about parents killing themselves and suddenly having no one but herself to care for. You could really see a relief in her whole body as she explained this. I hope she continues taking better care of herself than her parents.
Thank you this really means a lot
@@octoberhartline4849hey don’t know if you will see this but your parents were so in love in there wedding video and your mom was so beautiful 😢it is so sad that addiction killed her, and you look so much like your mother!!! I can’t imagine the grief you are going through, but take time for yourself to heal and I’m so sorry you went through this!!! Sending you love 💕 and at least your parents aren’t suffering anymore!!!! Loved your interview ❣️
To October, if you read this, I want to say thank you for sharing your story. ❤ You’re an inspirational person, and so resilient and strong. When you said how you loved your parents, even though they were consumed by addiction, it really showed how understanding and loving you are. Not many people have the mature perspective you do. Please never give up because the world needs more people like you. This might sound odd, but you’re existence inspires me to continue going because if you can make it then so can anyone else. You also mentioned how you may avoid future relationships, and I want to say that although I can understand your perspective, I want you to know that healthy relationships do exist and you are so deserving of one. You don’t have to be perfect to be in a good relationship, you just have to be your best self, and from what I can tell, you are one of the best people out there. Even if you don’t believe that, there are many people out there, including me, that would say you are the best! Please continue living life full of love, because the answer to all problems in life can be overcome with love. ❤
Amen!
Hear hear!!!
Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to listen to my story and type this comment. It seriously touches my heart and means so much to me. I appreciate your kindness more than you know❤
@@octoberhartline4849 😊thanks for sharing your story. Keep grinding and I'm sure God will bless you.
You explained it perfectly and I agree 100%.
I can’t tell you how much I needed this interview. Our stories are eerily similar, but instead of being in the rock scene my parents were in the hip hop one. My dad was recently released from being locked up for 4 years, and I can tell he’s already ran back to the drugs. I’m 23 years old , but I swear half of those years has been used up worrying about that man. I’m currently across the country and I feel like I’m waiting for “that call” every day. It’s killing me too. He’s my best friend and an amazing dad. Addiction sucks. Thank you for your story October.
❤❤❤
I pray the rest of your life you get to know true peace. Pray to God to help heal you ❤
I love how she is so full of compassion and love for her parents, but also wise enough to honour her own feelings. It sounds awful, but your wings are no longer tethered by their addictions and dysfunction, this is your chance to fly free babygirl- I hope you have a wonderful life ❤
For not being an ex-addict, she would be a great addiction counselor. She’s lived through it!
Even if she hadn't been through it, she would make a great counselor. She very informed, empathetic, reflective, and communicative
And this is exactly why I quit drinking, so my kids will never have to feel pain like this. AA saved my life.
Unfortunately when one stops, it doesn't mean the other one will. My husband has 14 years more clean than I do. The fact that he stuck with me, and didn't let me go, just makes me thank God every single day. And he was there for the kids when I couldn't be. I was also raised by addicts/alcoholics. My kids are actually breaking the cycle 🙏🏻. Thank you for your story, and thank you, Mark!
She's so tough, smart, that girls got grit And compassion. Rare combo. ❤
This was a therapy session she definitely needed. She lived such a mature life as a small teenager basically taking care of both of her parent's mental health without complaining. Hope she's doing ok wish her the best.
I really like her perspective on life. Sometimes when you've been through a lot you just have to take it slow and be thankful for what you have. She's a wise person.
I have no words. The courage to take something so negative and turn it into something so positive. October, you are such an inspiration. Best wishes to you, you are going to continue to do amazing things.
i grew up in chattanooga around october. we are the same age. i vividly remember her being one of the prettiest girls in the city yet no one ever saw her. i remember girls at my school looking through her instagram and saying “if i looked like her i would be the most popular girl in the city how come she’s not?” and the boys would look at her insta and say “how come i’ve never seen her at football games she’s so hot” it sounds super shallow but we were high school girls of course. come to find out this is what she was dealing with the whole time. october, i am so sorry you had to grow up so fast and deal with this. you should be immensely proud of who you’ve become and the grace that you’ve carried through this. praying and hoping you find peace and purpose and keep succeeding in life 💗
October has resilience because her EARLY childhood, to her, was great. She felt accepted and loved. Yes, she's experienced dysfunction, deviant behaviours, unpredictability and instability but those EARLY years are what is key. I've taught many, many high school students over the years and know first hand how what happens between the ages of 0 and 5 is paramount to how the individual is able to cope, both intellectually as well as emotionally in the following years. And the entire secret to resilience. Indeed, even if one parent is emotionally supportive, even in only 50% of the time, the effect on the child is HUGE. I have both personal and professional experience. My adult sons and their families are the most important people to me and then include a couple of other select humans and every dog and cat I've ever known ........ A public figure who's biography can be compared to October's is Liza Minelli and sadly, this "family scenario" is becoming more common although every family has its dysfunctions. October will be just fine.
yes the early childhood is KEY- 100% as a therapist you realize that pretty quickly
Well said! Thank you for sharing that! There is no bitterness or “poor me - victim attitude” love her. I met her and immediately was struck by this beautiful grateful attitude October has 💪❤
Yes she may be "fine" but that doesn't mean she doesn't suffer cause of all that trauma.
THIS!!! Those formative years are everything for development
That’s odd so interesting. I remember my childhood feeling so loved and would swear it was beautiful but I’m my late 20s I sobered up n realized how traumatic and chaotic my entire life had been. With your input, it’s realize, yes, I was loved and nurtured, but wow the things I saw and was put through, those really bad memories have been hard to forget. I appreciate your input.
She says “I have to start all the way over…” - you’ve learned & experienced many life lessons, that many will never know or understand much later in life. This so much more valuable than any tangible item…good luck! We’re cheering you on!
Her story is so unbelievably similar to my own, and I’m amazed at her grace, perspective, intellect, and beauty- both inside and out.
There’s something incredibly evolved about telling this story, a story that’s so tragic by the end, but beginning it with “I had an awesome childhood”. So many people with tragic stories just start with the trauma, start from the spot where things turned bad. To have the perspective, to understand the juxtaposition between the good and the bad, to see the nuance in spite of all that happened and how traumatized she must be, how in some ways they stole her adolescence and she’s still able to cherish the good years- it’s so unlike most people and it shows such a grace and maturity and evolved state of mind.
October,
I just want to say that you’re absolutely right about taking your time. I’ve got a similar backstory. I’m 26 now and I’m a law student. I started college at 23. I was way behind my peers. But I took my time. And thank god for that. Because I’m a 4.0 student, I’ve got a child of my own, and I know there’s no way I would’ve been so successful at 18 or 20. I needed time to exist, to be myself, to be separate from that fight for survival. Now I have the opportunity to go to one of the top three law schools in the US, despite being a kid from a podunk town in Arkansas. It’s beyond my wildest dreams and it’s only possible because I took my time.
Thank you so much for your kindness & support. I appreciate you sharing your story as well❤
She’s a badass 💯 I really admire that she still loves her parents despite everything they put her through. It really felt like she was there parent when it came to their addictions and domestic violence.
I hope the rest of your life is wonderful, you deserve only happiness after all of this darkness. You seem to be handling it as well as any human being could. Much love from Lancaster, PA!
What a truly insightful & inspiring comment! This is one of the few things that I actually love about the internet. You & October seem like such strong individuals & I wish you both nothing but the very best in life! ❤
That is NOT evolved...it is magical thinking. Her mother was a horrible alcoholic. Her father was a drug addict. Both of them were incredibly self-absorbed and neglected the hell out of her, and abused her in a myriad of ways.
She was not a child, she was THE PARENT and adult in the home. They BOTH parentified her. She died at 40. Do you have any idea of how many decades someone has been a hardcore alcoholic to die at 40?
This girl has been through pure hell...by both of her immature, self-absorbed addict parents.
I really appreciate how you brought up the impact that addiction has on Animals. Its a very valid yet underestimated subject.
I knew two dogs who witnessed a very tragic homicide connected with their owners.. Ive never seen animals change so much in the course of their lives.
You seem to have your head screwed on right now..impressive..you are just what you described your mom as being ..take care
I cannot believe how amazing this young woman is. Based on when she went to high school, she is likely what, 20?? Born in 2003??? I have no words. AMAZING PERSON. I wish her a wonderful life despite the nightmare.
Thank you so much for your kindness it means a lot to me!
@@octoberhartline4849 You're an incredibly young, beautiful and strong woman, October. You've been through way too much for anyone, and you told your story with such grace and dignity. It's obvious that you loved your parents despite the horrible grip addiction had on the two of them. They're both at peace now, and you deserve time to unwind, heal, and move forward. You're definitely a survivor. Hugs from Canada. 🇨🇦 🤗 ❤
Well she was 18 in 2021 so yes she is now 20
What this girl has gone through is unfathomable. She is amazingly strong.
This story could be a helluva script for a movie. You are a great speaker and have a great future in anything you try. The love for your parents shows tons of maturity.
Wow - she doesn't have a single visible tattoo. This is incredible, given her parents' love of this artform.
Incredible observation - and it probably is significant.
This young woman is the epitome of dignity, perserverance and grace. Her experiences prove that some people can choose not to allow their past to define their future and I wish Miss October all of the hope, peace and joy that life has to offer. Happy Journey!
No she isn't, and you're just trying to get laid.
My dad had an opiate addiction for about 10 years, he died from thoe effects last year. I cant begin to explain how both horrified and comforted I i was to listen to listen to this similar story
This girl is amazing and has handled her environment and family with incredible courage. She exhibits a classic role of being the parent and responsible person in a family of addicts. I am so impressed with her.
Girl if you’re ever in New York and need to vent..you’ve got a friend right here. I watched my mom go through a nightmare of life, a life on drugs, alcohol combined with schizophrenia and she died of cancer in September. Having unstable parents is tough. I thank god every day I was raised by my grandparents with my mom just being in and out of my life. Thank you for sharing your story. You are so strong and resilient. I’m sure maybe in the comments or in real life people might say wow how could you go through so much and come out “normal.” Remember: GOD only gives us what we can handle. We are living examples of that. I am happy you have a good head on your shoulders. Stay strong and keeping tracking forward ❤❤❤
October is a beautiful and intelligent girl and she loved her parents, dearly. She has been resilient, however, her experiences do make her vulnerable as she is idolizing them yet they were not good parents, obviously, because of their addictions. I would guess that October has some PTSD and could go through her young life being a magnet for dysfunctional people. We grow up with roles we have to play and didn’t choose in our families of origin. Her role was to be the peacemaker and saviour for her co-dependent parents. I hope October will get therapy because she will need it. You cannot escape that kind of childhood unscathed. If she doesn’t feel comfortable with her therapist, she should find another one until she gets the right one. We all have our social masks on at times and can appear happy and confident when that is not really the case. May God bless her and I wish her all the best. ❤️🇨🇦🙏🙏🙏
Mark I have watched your channel for over 2 years now, and this is by far the best interview I have ever seen. October, you are an absolutely incredible woman who has over came so much with so much strength and grace, take your time, because no matter what you will be extremely successful, you already are ❤️ I’m rooting for you girl 💕
I agree 💯
Like many I came here to watch 5 or 10mins when I noticed it was over an hour long… yet here I am 30mins in and can’t stop watching. She is a very efficient and clear story teller ❤
October is so right about not rushing things and just taking the time you need. I know so many people who have ruined their lives or made bad decisions because of the pressure to "keep up". Such a powerful story.
She’s been through so much at such a young age. I’m praying for her to find her happiness. ❤️
if u want her to find happiness you should probably do something useful. try showing real concern instead of the fake concern """"praying"""" displays.
Girl, you have your whole life ahead of you. You have an opportunity right now to decide to break the generational trauma your parents unintentionally passed to you. Please get into a good trauma therapist now, while you're young and healthy and beautiful, because these generational cycles will manifest in unexpected and insidious ways that you can't anticipate. We all really want to see you succeed in life, according to your own personal definition of success. Get this trauma out of your way. Such unspeakable horror was imposed on you at a young age, and you didn't deserve any of it, but it happened and it's imperative that you work through it with a professional.
Yes! Very well spoken! You have everything you need to be anything and have anything you choose. An effective cognitive behavior therapists will have tools and strategies to help review your childhood, determine you ACE score, determine who your outside influences were. Outside influences bring you ACE score down a little but it gives you and the therapists the information to know which things you need to prepare for in the future. You are a cycle breaker already but when you have children of your own, that trauma will show up. If nothing else, your adrenalin will overreact to simple triggers like your 2 year old having tantrums for example. You won't do anything but internalize it and the adrenalin response will be making you sick without you knowing it is one example of what a therapists can help you redirect. I didn't start until I was in my 50's and my children were grown. I'm dealing with medical issues from the adrenalin now. Please don't wait is the best advice I have.
I’m in therapy thank you for your kindness ❤
@@octoberhartline4849 Good for you. I don't understand why anyone would assume you're not and comment before they know what they're talking about. You've got this and you did an amazing job telling your story. I'm so proud of you. 😊 ❤
Dear October, You make everyone who hears your story proud of you. I'm so sorry for your losses, your parents, your dog, and some important parts of your childhood. I love hearing about how much you enjoy your day to day life. Educate yourself about everything related to addiction, as it can appear in many different disguises. Alanon helped me a lot, but to each her own. Sending love....
I've seen this before - and not always drug addicted parents and with kids her age! The daughter is the parent, and her parents are the children she is caring for. Anyhow she is an absolute angel. I wish the very best for her, as do EVERYONE who has seen this video. She has a LOT of fans, supporters, and people that care for her.
You are a compassionate old soul and the world is blessed to have you in it.
I relate to her story so, so, so much. My mom was a heroin addict and later an alcoholic. I really relate to the fact that she still loves them and sees them as good parents despite the addictions, I feel that way about my mom and it's so complicated I think only children of other addicts can get it.
Thank you for sharing wishing you the best❤
@@octoberhartline4849 thanks same to you!
It’s so very true!
I completely agree, it’s hard to understand unless they’ve gone through similar.
Both of my parents are alcoholics, it’s a very torn feeling that I have about them, yet they’re my parents and I have seen them in both lights.
🙏🏻
She rose above it all and never gave up. My heart hurts for what this young lady went through but I am also happy for her that she is in a safe space. We need to protect this young lady at all costs!
I'm a father of 4 kids. I feel for this young woman. I have made my mistakes but never left my kids in a state of needing me and not being there.
You are so mature and have the strength that many adults do not. I’m so sorry that you had to be the “parent,” and that you are so resilient is truly astounding.
Oh, wow. I can relate. My Mom was in the hospital with cirrhosis at age 45. The doctors said she'd die in a year if she didn't stop drinking. My Dad said " you kids better figure out how to make her stop". Btw, she didn't. Drank every day for 30 more years. Her brain was mush. And she was really mean. I didn't stop taking care of her till she died when I was 45. You're a strong woman, October. And sometimes we have to create our own families. I'm so sorry.
You kids better find a way to make her stop??? Good god, sadly your dad obviously didn't have a clue about addiction.
@Baubles and Dolls when you are going through it sometimes it's hard to apply theory to reality
@@Happy_Spatula So true!
@@Broskisnowski NO ONE CAN STOP AN ADDICT EXCEPT THEMSELF!! Your reply confirms exactly what I said about knowing nothing about addiction!
I am 50 years old and have been clean and sober for 29 years....Sorry that you had to go through this but just know your parents loved you and they were just sick...focus on the good memories and spend the rest of your days living the best life you can....live the way you wished they would have lived their lives ....god bless
This interview was really heartbreaking.. brought me the tears. To watch your beautiful family fall apart to that level......😢. I'm amazed at how articulate, gracious and well-rounded October was describing her parents and the horrors of addiction. She has such a beautiful resilience . I hope she gets all the support and healing she needs to recover. ❤❤❤
Quite often in order to disassociate from family, a close relative will refer to the addict as he or any number of other pronouns. It's so sad because she repeatedly says "my dad" because she loves and cares about him so much.
Despite the horrific conditions she lived within, she is a solid and amazing young woman. PROPS
this isnt describinggaypeople
@@subtomypage didn't at all think she was referring togaypeople
I really wish alcoholic parents weren’t as accepted as they are.. So many parents with a drinking problem (like my mother) think it’s completely fine because its legal and seem to have no idea how deeply it can impact their kids.. like I’m not suggesting blame or guilt but encouraging them to get help and providing more information about what kind of problems it can cause for their kids would be great.
leave your poor mom alone. smh
@@cvltzilla with all due respect, you don’t know her.
What a blessing to this world to have a daughter like her. I'm glad that she can move on and flourished.
What a courageous and level-headed young woman! She is obviously the parent in the family. Tallk about role reversal!
Why does so many comment about her looks ? Its grose . She is sharing her horrible life story . She deserves nothing but peace and a healthy life. You are so strong and wise October . Thanks for letting the world know you ❤
Because beauty counts in this world.Thats why so many people are having all kinds of cosmetic surgery in the world.Some are even dying from it.
Because she's good looking
@kimkjrulff1731 It's a sad fact that looks are so important because of society. I don't care who you are, but people with good looks get treated much better. If she was 300 pounds, dirty clothes, spoke in a rough voice without proper use of English, I'm 100 percent positive the comments would be completely different. It's just the way it is.
@Baubles and Dolls I would agree with that, but someone shouldn't not be complimented if they do look good.
Kids growing up in a dysfunctional can only guess at what normal looks like .
October is an amazing young woman - and I hope she keeps “winning “ at life with a Good therapist around for any rough moments that creep up due to being the parent to her parents
Great interview
It's stunning how some children/loved ones of addiction can turn out like October; like a rose blooming out of quicksand.
You are a marvel.
Share your story.
The rose that grew from concrete ❤
Sorry to hear about your mom :( I lost my mom when I was 19, she was 50 to lung cancer. It's so hard losing a parent.
You've got a bright future ahead of you young lady. Thank you for sharing your story. Very well spoken!
Both my parents were addicts too, heroin and pills mostly, and the all too familiar mental problems. My mom was a model with an eating disorder and my dad would self harm and unfortunately had an obsession with knives at the same time. It was crazy and I’m sure if we were to exchange stories we would be here until next year. One thing about us is our dark sense of humor is just unmatched.
Your story resonates and will for a lot of people! I run a helpline service for those like us specifically, and you’re explaining it spot on actually. I also just want to confirm alcohol does kill and is a far bigger problem than any other substance. And to parents out there; you might think a couple of glasses won’t do any harm, but most kids are so sensitive they will notice even the littlest change. Ask them how they feel instead of assuming.
You graduated early, despite all the crap you're going through at at home!? Wow major kudos to you and much respect to you. I went through the same thing with my parents during high school. You are incredibly smart and mature. I have faith you will break the mold, and will create a wonderful life for yourself if you haven't already. You are helping others by sharing your story. Thank you this hit deep.
Trauma comes in many forms, and rears its ugly head very differently in many different situations, but how held together she comes across in this interview is incredible. I'm very sorry for your experience, October, and I hope that things can get better moving forward.
Hey October, your story really hit home. My wife and I live in Atlanta so I feel like your story has been playing right here in our back yard. Both of us have careers but are also musicians. I know you must be still be trying to find your footing. If you ever need anything in Atlanta, please let us know. We are solid with no addictions. She is a hairstylist and I am a lawyer,
Special ❤
I cannot express how much empathy I have for you, you went through so much. My dad was an alcoholic and I always thought my parents were better off separated (they were separated for a while but both were fighting for assets and made me crazy)…well it took 35 years for them to divorce and when it finally did I felt free for the first time in my life. Hugs to you! You’re a warrior, I take my hat off to you. ❤
What a sweet, smart, amazing young girl. No sex work, no addictions of her own. Somewhere in there her parents instilled something very positive in her.I guess you could say, at least she knew she was loved. I pray that she finally has the peace she deserves. She's so right, take it easy and enjoy life.
Wow, that was off the charts! For her to be so articulate about her family and navigate her parents addictions, just incredible. Often times the children become more of a parent than the parents are. Thank you for sharing
You can't think for a second that your parents weren't proud of you. They looked up to you like a mother. Addiction makes people so vulnerable and your love for them felt like the love of a parent as I listened to your experiences. We can't fix anyone's addiction, they have to come to that point on their own. I'm so sorry that your life was so traumatic and condolences for your losses. You're an inspiration to those listening and whether you become an esthetician or something else it's clear you're someone to be proud of. You'll find your way and heal others along your path. I don't even know you but I'm proud you. Thank you for sharing your story with the world. I hope everyone's comments find you like a loving embrace. It would have been easy to fall into the same patterns of addiction and self harm but the universe has better plans for you. Stay strong 🤗
October,
You are so incredibly poised.
I think I speak for everyone when I say that you are a remarkable young woman. Your strength is insanely admirable.
I wish you nothing but the very best ❤️
October, I am so sorry you lost both your parents. I lost my mom to DV fueled by drugs and alcohol and I am ok now. I’m not 100% fine but I’ve been a pediatric ICU nurse, I worked adult ICU during the pandemic and I’ve saved hundreds of lives. I have a son. I have a home and a car and dogs and I’ve been beautiful places. I do what I love now. Have hope. Life is not always sunshine and rainbows and I did experience DV later on in life but I learned so much from that. Things are better on the other side of all this. I don’t drink or do drugs. You’re going to have an amazing life and if you ever do have kids you can tell them your story and also every person you meet so hopefully one less person has to go through this. ❤ God bless you girl. Keep being strong.
She deserves the world. How open and fluent she spoke about and delivered her story moves oceans.
Soo proud of her! She is a rarity most kids that go through this will experience drug abuse themselves and enter in similar situations. Be strong like her! 🎉 your parents are not you ! You don’t have to take on this generational curse so proud of this girl wish you nothing but the best and lots of success you made it out girl!❤❤❤❤
I cannot believe it... I don't have addicted parents, but my dad acted really similar to her... The scary thing is that I realize sometimes I'm a bit like that... And I want to prevent it at all cost...
I have never seen such a mature girl in my entire life . To speak wise before tragedy and after !! Your parents are proud of you and I’m sure they always were .
Loads of love from Poland/Europe
As a survivor of trauma, the last thing you want to hear every 5 minutes is how "strong" and "resilient" you are, when you actually feel like you're dying inside and just want to be loved and feel supported. October its ok if you don't feel like superwoman after going through all of that - and I sincerely pray that you have a good support system in place and that you are in therapy and talking to someone about your feelings. You deserve the best of everything. May your parents rest peacefully - God bless you.
Always a little jealous of people that can be raised in the struggle and turn out great. October clearly figured out some things I never did. What a badass. I hope after having to spend her youth taking care of people she is finally getting some care for herself
P.s. dont avoid having a partner. Negative connection may be all you've seen, but thats not all that exists; please take it from a fellow ex-skeptic: a good partner brings out greatness in you.
Will power
Silver spoon.
@@ItsSauIGoodman Did you even watch the video?
@@ItsSauIGoodman How do you know they had money? She constantly talked about their failing business. You're projecting stuff that is just not there.
@@ItsSauIGoodman You clearly didn't watch the video. She must have mentioned her parents driving off clients 5 times.
I'm going to leave you and your jealousy-based projection in the echo chamber. Takes a real special person to judge a very positive, 90 min long video so shallowly, based on the thumbnail, which is clearly what you did. Peace out.
I love her perspective. I lost a parent to suicide in college and since the family motto was 'suck it up' i didn't take a break or anything. But then i got violently robbed by a gang of men and it kicked in major ptsd symptoms and ended up bailing for a semester anyway. Her idea to just take it easy when you need to is perfect. You don't need to push yourself all the time. Wisdom beyond her years.
October, you unfortunately learned super early how precious time is. So I’m glad you’re not rushing things, you’re able to just figure it all out. I’m really sorry about your parents. You sound like you were a great daughter…and it’s nice that you can remember the parts of them that were sweet. I know it sounds cheesy but I’m glad you have your dads dog, I hope that you guys can grieve and heal together.
October, both my parents were addicts too. My father had severe ptsd and was very verbally abusive. I later spoke out about 6 him to my family and got canceled. I suffered for years as an adult from depression because it is so lonely being a child of addicts.
But in my 30s I found the love of my life, great friends, graduated from college and accomplished lots of things. Keep your head up. You are a very smart and self aware woman. You are brave. Thank you for sharing your story with us. You will inspire a lot of people and give them hope.
Thank you so much for the support and thank you for sharing your story. So glad to hear you are making the best out of your situation it’s very inspiring
I share a very similar situation. Both parents meth addicts, homeless, all that and then family being very judgmental and canceling me as well, which is fine becaise I never felt loved or supported by them. Never had a helping hand other than the friends I made that are like my family now and I also met the love of my life, adopted my brother, graduated and now work an amazing career that that family now calls me asking me for jobs. Sending loves and hugs to you, and IM SO PROUD OF YOU! we did it! I know those years you speak of, they almost got me to babe.. the pain/that type of loneliness can only be understood by those who experience it and it’s not a lot of people that have so thus end up feeling even more lonely.
I experience the same. It hurts so much to suffer in silence because they don't want to face the reality but we have to live it.
Wow! October you are ridiculously strong. I cannot even imagine what you went through. Thank you so much for sharing your life, you truly deserve the world!! 💗
Poor baby so sorry she had to go thru this!.breaks my heart to peices wish I could give her the biggest hug in the world right now..she's so strong it's amazing but deep down you can see the hurt