We're Chained to Our Phones and It's Scarier Than We Think
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 8 ก.ค. 2022
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hi!! i'm shaniya but i use the moniker 'shanspeare' on youtube. i'm 23, use they/them pronouns, and i love talking about everything pop culture :)
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videos mentioned in this episode:
- Canceling by Contrapoints: • Canceling | ContraPoints
- How Cancel Culture Replaces Accountability with Anger & Trauma by Jessie Gender: • The Cynical Cancel Cul...
- Social media is the perfect place for a weak, insecure, projecting, narcissist by lipgloss: • Social media is the pe...
- The Anti-Tech Movement is Back by Alice Capelle: • the anti-tech movement...
Misunderstanding dopamine: Why the language of addiction matters by Cyrus McCandless: • Misunderstanding dopam...
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sources:
Whiteclaw, “Dogpiling on Social Media: Without long term goals, it’s just empty performance.”
Dogpatch Press, dogpatch.press/2019/12/02/dog...
Wikipedia. “Extremely Online.” en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extreme...
Hawes, William. “The Rise of the Terminally Online: Digital Subjectivity and Simulation of the Social.” Medium, / the-rise-of-the-termin...
Miller, Clair Cain. “Social Networks a Lifeline for the Chronically Ill.” New York Times, www.nytimes.com/2010/03/25/te...
Al-Heeti, Abrar. “'Chronically online': What the phrase means, and some examples.” CNet, www.cnet.com/culture/internet...
Cox, Anna. “You’re Not Woke, You’re Just Chronically Online.” Heritage Herald, heritageherald.com/2022/03/24...
Kaufer, Dan MD. “The Effects of Smart Phone Usage on the Brain.” UNC Health Talk, healthtalk.unchealthcare.org/....
Haynes, Trevor. “Dopamine, Smartphones, & You: A Battle for Your Time.” SITN, sitn.hms.harvard.edu/flash/20...
MacGuineas, Maya. “Capitalism’s Addiction Problem.” The Atlantic, www.theatlantic.com/magazine/...
Claypoole, Theodore F. “Privacy and Social Media.” Business Law Today, 2014, pp. 1-4. JSTOR, www.jstor.org/stable/businessl.... Accessed 30 Jun. 2022.
Lee, E. Bun. “Too Much Information: Heavy Smartphone and Facebook Utilization by African American Young Adults.” Journal of Black Studies, vol. 46, no. 1, 2015, pp. 44-61. JSTOR, www.jstor.org/stable/24572928. Accessed 30 Jun. 2022.
Zhuo, Julie. “Where Anonymity Breeds Contempt.” The New York Times, www.nytimes.com/2010/11/30/op...
McCandless, Cyrus H. “Misunderstanding Dopamine: Why the Language of Addiction Matters.” TH-cam, • Misunderstanding dopam... - แนวปฏิบัติและการใช้ชีวิต
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The scariest thing about our phone addiction is that we are all aware that we're addicted, but we're not going to do anything about it.
Idk i think that speaks for addiction in general. Like peoples addictions could be literally killing them and even if they feel guilty over it or experiencing the consequences, they still won't be able to stop.
Yes, but no! This statement is, as you may realize, only furthering the addiction because it’s fatalistic. It says: « It’s not solvable nobody can do it so why even try ». Perfect excuse right? Well maybe I can give you hope. Right now, I deleted all my social media account (even pinterest) that I could delete. I went an entire summer only using my flip phone. And now I can read an entire book in a day again! It’s possible. I make promises to myself the day before usually when I do detox.
I mean, plenty of people aren't addicted to it, that seems like projection to me.
this comment does not apport anything nor help at all
@@leonliptak funny how yours doesn't either 🤔
"Reading even if your brain won't latch" I use to be an avid reader, I could finish a book in one sitting with no issue, but now I couldn't do that to save my life. My mind drifts away even when what I'm reading is interesting and I end up picking up my phone. It makes me sad and I yearn for the younger version of myself that found so much joy in books. I find significantly less joy being online, yet I can't help myself.
i have the same problem and what i realized recently is that every book that i’ve actually finished within like the past two years(only three books 😩) is that all the books that keep my attention have super short chapters. No matter how long the actual book is as long as it’s chapters are tiny i can make it so now i’m going to start looking for that in books! it’s rough out here but our phones have changed our attention spans and instead of beating ourselves up about it we gotta just meet ourselves where we are
@@Valentine-pm3kb this! I've found myself only liking books that have short chapters, otherwise they're not able to keep me interested. It makes me SO sad yet I don't know what to do about it
@@Valentine-pm3kb well said and great idea!
idk about you but as a kid, i would also read a lot as a form of escapism, so as an adult now i’ve just transpired that onto my phone and learning random things even though they don’t always click.
same :(
Y'all, I'm so proud of myself. My screen time as of now before I go to bed (21:33) and I wake at (6:00) every morning was 3hr and 9 minutes. I went from 8-10hrs a day to 2-3hrs a day.
😤clap for me😎
👏
respect 👏
PROUD OF U👏👏👏
same, today
😂🙏🙏🙏🙏
What’s really interesting is that no one ever talks about TH-cam being just as bad as all the other social medias lol. I deleted most of mine a year ago as an experiment and as a result ended up spending upwards of 6+ hours on TH-cam. The content is much longer, much more clickbait-y, just as toxic and the algorithm works like a well oiled machine to keep you clicking. And let’s not even talk about the shorts…
Yes! I deleted all my social media except for TH-cam a couple years ago and guess what- I still found a way to spend 7 hours a day on my phone. I think the issue is more about the fact that screen time is supposed to be distracting us from real life- whether that be videogames, tv, social media, or whatever. The dependence on it, I believe, comes from us not wanting to face our real life struggles.
Ah I deleted TikTok for a few months a year ago just to fall into shorts. Except my shorts were all Reddit stories. I don’t know why the algorithm thought of Reddit stories for me, but I ate it up. I’m not on shorts that much anymore, except to catch up with my favorite creators. That’s it. And lately my TH-cam recommended has been not very good. The videos it shows don’t interest me personally. Show even more time playing stupid games for me!
Ughhh that’s me in a nutshell. It’s hard for me to stop myself from checking on TH-cam and see what’s new. The problem is you can search almost anything on it good and bad. If you’re spending the majority of time trying to learn something new like looking up art tutorials then that can be good thing, (as long as you’re not over doing it.) But, if you’re watching a bunch of nonsense then yeah it’s a waste of time.
Also, my worst problem is that I automatically read the comments before I watch the video and sometimes I don’t even watch it in the first place. I even did it with this video. Lol
@@nightynightlayla374 lmao I did the exact same thing
Yes, we're mindless robots when it comes to technology. Fun Fact: The reason Charlie Brooker named his show "Black Mirror" was because when you stare at a blank TV, laptop or phone screen, it resembles a black mirror, and forces the individuals to realise just how long they've been wasting time with their technology.
woah...............
that’s dark 😀😰
@@vanessarl8 very subtle
@@vanessarl8 I love that song and it slaps but honestly it has nothing to do w this topic or at least w the op comment lol😅
We don't let technology control our lives, we just ket corporations control our lives.
Honestly children also belong in the “not really their fault” group: they’re on the Internet so much because they aren’t given as much freedom to go outside. It’s scary that the Internet is exploiting them just because they are more dependent on their parents and want to be more independent and express themselves
True. It’s not healthy for kids to be this controlled. Kids used to have WAY more freedom way younger, historically.
Agreed. My parents would get mad at me for spending so much time online and not outside, and yet I basically wasn’t allowed to outside anyway… it was a damned if you do, damned if you don’t situation.
Yes and it sucks bc very rarely is it even safe for children to play outside nowadays.
I’m not just talking about the rampant predators living in small towns(my town literally had a whole street where 90% of the people living on it were convicted predators), people live in cities with nowhere for children to play. Yards are smaller and smaller as property taxes are too high for a lot of families to afford. Parks are unkempt and littered with needles and trash.
That, and parents have to work more to provide, and aren’t around as much to keep an eye on children outside. They’re exhausted when they return home from work, and just want to chill with TV. It’s different times.
@@smolexfundie6458 Yards being smaller is actually a good thing. Like in a city planning sense. Large yards spread suburbs out more and makes them less walkable and less dense. Which then makes that area more dependent on cars and less safe for everyone not inside a car.
In cities in the Netherlands, it's very common for young children to go out on their own and remain safe because the cities are way less car dependent and have higher density housing, which keeps more eyes on the street than in less dense areas. In general, crime rates decrease when there are more people around to see a crime happen. So children in these areas can be safe even while away from their parents.
Almost all the unsafe aspects of cities in north america comes from the car being ubiquitous.
My mom talks about how she used to walk to friend's houses all the time and play outside or go to different stores and places. But now she gets paranoid when I just take a neighborhood stroll... The fact that the nearest public building (Kroger :/) is a 30 minute walk from my house and none of my school friends live in my neighborhood doesn't help either. It truly is a suburban hell...
it’s chronically online to think that the phrase “chronically online” is ableist. the word “chronic” has its own definition. that’s literally CRAZY.
LITERALLY
i was JUST about to comment this. the irony is hilarious
it's so funny that I wonder if it's a very dry joke
right!!! i thought at first that it was a bit about using the term 'chronically online' to exemplify the meaning of chronically online. of course people feel how they feel and I can understand why people may feel that way but that feeling stems from general discrimination towards disabled people, the word 'chronic' isn't what is causing that issue? I want to say that I nonetheless think this is a great video overall.
THANK YOU
I think about this and I cry. I feel like I’m wasting my life and I hate it but I am blissfully complacent in it. Phone addiction has introduced so much conflict in my mind and it is torture.
You're not alone. I always cry over this or feel like crying too. it really does feel like we are wasting our lives away
yesss
Then don't be complacent anymore! You've got this! Find out what the function of your phone addiction is! For me it was a way to avoid my negative feelings, fear of failure, and stress. I deleted all my social media apps, and replaced the time I spend on them by writing about my negative feelings and stress instead, and feeling those feelings, first thing in the morning. That freed up a lot of space within myself to keep going, not caving in and downloading the apps again, and just enjoying my life. I don't feel like I'm wasting my life anymore. So what the function for you? Avoiding a feeling of loneliness? Avoiding a fear of failure? Avoiding a sense of emptiness in your life of lack of fullfillment? Tackle those issues, and just delete the apps, treat it like any other addiction. It's hard at first but you will be so thankful later. Take yourself seriously, take this addiction and the underlying issues seriously, and you'll be able to solve them. You're stronger than you think. We've got this 💪
Phone addiction can lead to terrible consequences. I’m sure that a majority of us are guilty for somehow abusing technology and internet. Addiction, in general, is a very serious problem. Many people to this day still struggle to come to terms with their unhealthy or toxic routinely habits. This sure is an eye-opener. Everyday, it seems we are getting more and more detached from reality.
Yeah Im a living breathing example of it. Im in my mid 20s and almost driven to suicide because of too much comparison and beauty/success standard thats placed in my brain. Its like Ive spent so much time on my phone for escapism, and it turned into just me watching others live their perfect life while I do nothing in my own life. I feel like a zombie and I feel diseased to a point of being irreversible. I feel worthless all the time but I also feel so sad that my life has been wasted on other strangers online that doesnt even know me.
@@bapbirb Same here. I wish you the best and live your life the way you want to. I promise you’ll be okay. 😊👍
@@bapbirb I’m so sorry,I feel the exact same way.I’ve felt it and I’ve even tried 2.I’m only thirteen and I compare myself to people who have a more exciting life every.single.day.I feel like a zombie and I often find myself trying to perfect my ways of speaking,dressing,acting.But does it even bring me true happiness? I’m scared of the future and what person I’m going to be.
@@dorely2222 I don't like to bring up age, but you are so so young.. Its unfortunate that media has affected so many young people when they deserve to have a stress-free childhood. But it is what it is I guess.. I just want to say focus on yourself. Spend time on yourself, not so much on other people on social media or celebrities. Because we still do have power over how much time we can spend and what we choose to look up on our phones because it is just a device at the end of the day. I wished that I learned to have control of that growing up, but because I didnt and wasnt aware of the danger of addiction, it affected me more than it should've. And I ended up blaming myself for being 'not good enough' when it was just my media-addicted brain messing with me. Even though Im aware of that now, as an adult its much harder for me to unlearn the things I've learned. Also, wasted potential/time is alot to deal with.. but you still have so much time to learn to love yourself and find your purpose for your future. I just have alot of hope and love for you.
@@dorely2222 im sorry you feel that way seety but i can tell you that 20 years ago i felt the same way. I did not have social media but i had tv shows and teen magazines. I felt worthless and like i could never measure up against my peers or celebrities. That feeling never goes away fully, its human nature to wonder and feel like the grass is always greener on the other side, but you learn how to make peace with it and to feel somewhat more secure in yourself.. if you work on it. At 31 im still working on it loool but it gets easier with time xxxxxx
The fact that they said having background noise when u cook while as I'm cooking 💀✋🏽I feel called out
im literally making lemonade rn T-T
@@doestthoucapisci449 girl are you cooking the lemons
@@owinlaa I’m dead lmao 😂
@@owinlaa NO lemonade in my country traditionally is a syrup jfslfjdk
@@doestthoucapisci449 oh that makes sense then 💀💀
Finally someone in this generation admits we have a serious problem. A shocking lack of people talk about this.
I think more teens recognize the problem than you realize. Maybe they won't outright come out and say it, they don't want to confirm the claims of shitty adults that the kids these days are mentally weak and lack self control, or be judged by their peers for being critical of a popular activity. But bring the subject up and get them talking, a lot of them will admit that they spend too much time on their phones and wish they could break the habit. It's not like they wouldn't rather be doing other things, ya know?
Not only this generation. My mom who is gen x can't get her eyes off facebook. She just scrolls and scrolls, mostly looking at shorts, even when I want to talk to her.
@@kitcat2449 same here. After work my mom mindlessly scrolls facebook and keeps showing me weird viral posts and videos. Its annoying because its hard to talk to her about anything when shes scrolling and she gets mad when me and my grandma mention it to her. I get that she works a lot and needs to wind down but its to the point where she falls asleep on the couch mid scroll and doesn't wake up until 12-3am to go to bed. I love my mom very much but just watching her destroy her mind and body like this is hurting me... Sorry for ranting 😅
@@tw6704 Dw about ranting, that's actually 100% my mom too! It's hard, as you said, if you try to tell her about it she will get annoyed. I wish they understood we are just worried. Social media is fine in regulation but if it gets to that point it's definitely harmful, in fact she isn't even winding down by feeding her brain by constant (probably silly) stimuli. Not to mention they're losing precious family time. No one knows what happens in the near future, it would be better to enjoy the company of your close ones now that they're still here. I kinda miss the flip phone era, at least back then you had to go on a computer to look at stuff. Now everything is accessible 24/7.
@@kitcat2449 i completely agree ❤️
A good example of something extremely online happened on brazillian twitter a few months ago, a girl posted a photo of about 8 tubs of a sort of fancy ice cream brand with the caption saying that she had removed her wisdom teeth and couldn't eat solid foods, so she asked her dad for ice cream and he went a bit overboard bought a bunch of a nice ice cream for her. Completely normal unproblematic thing to do, right? Not to the people that were criticizing this random woman on twitter for:
1) Boasting about having expensive things in an economic crisis (I don't know why a girl buying ice cream was the thing people latched on and not literal billionaires but ok)
2) Posting that her dad was nice to her because not everyone has a dad ???
This random woman's post was on trending because of this...
dude I just had 2 wisdom teeth removed and my dad lives thousands of miles away. I would give anything for him to buy me ice cream rn. She deserves happiness man, wisdom tooth removal sucks
unhinged behaviour 😮
@@whatsyourname9581 my main issue with hobbies.. i used to do many. but now I feel guilty when i do something coz Im not recording anything. so I try to avoid doing anything to avoid that guilt for not recording it and trying to make it into content.
I used to do so many puzzles and someone said i should make shorts from it... and since that day I just couldnt.. i couldnt do puzzles anymore coz i felt guilty doing that without recording as it could be content ..
people are so unhinged online it’s really scary what type of people they are in real life. they project their issues to an innocent girl who has nothing to do with them. i understand that people want to have an outlet online because maybe they can’t in real life for certain reasons.. but that goes too far. i’ve seen it a lot too. i feel like people shouldn’t be projecting their issues at all towards anyone and they really need to reflect on themselves.
and the worst part is even though my phone usually makes me feel worse, i still keep picking it up like it’ll make me feel better
I feel this so much. I'm literally a recovering drug addict with multiple years of clean time, and my biggest issue now is my phone addiction, it feels like the same sickness playing out in a different way.
the thing with my phone is that it makes me distracted and forget about my problems irl by watching videos and scrolling through social media
without using any phones or gadgets in general, its like im forced to face them all and then i overthink about everything
Can addictions be genetic? Like not the addiction itself but the whole concept of it. Cause if so I know why I turned out this way..
@@Asaspecimenyesimextraoddinary I mean it can be passed down from parents if that’s what your asking? And sometimes people just have addicting personalities so that could be you as well
@@elenal1906 Yeah, I was gonna say this all feels very similar to drug addiction :( same reward chemicals I suppose
I'm 2 minutes in and I realize their going to call me out a significant amount of times
Agreed, they usually always end up calling me out on my bad habits! 😂
they've called me out to oblivion within the first min LOLL
i'm scrolling whilst watching this vid so : |
Mood.
They exactly explained my relationship with my phone 😬
Bring offended by the phrase chronically or terminally online is ironically very chronically online behaviour 😭
Exactly! “Chronic” does not just refer to illness
@@raya6508 the word "chronic" is literally derived from ancient greek "khronos", which just means time.
fr
I'm not offended by it as a disabled person, but hearing someone respect disabled people and bring them up (for once) was very refreshing. This is not respecting disabled people and their wishes. Please rethink, I know the disabled community is hardly a thought for many people. But just dwell on how they feel for a bit.
Yeah, I have a disability and I have to wonder if this is a conclusion anyone would come to if the Discourse didn't tell them to.
I feel like technology has made me “lazy”. Not even in a way I feel like I can control. I just can’t find the motivation to do things that I need to. Like I keep my house clean on the minimal level, but I haven’t deep cleaned my house for almost 2 years now and I know I need to but I just can’t bring myself to do it. I waste so much time on my phone or computer that I could have spent doing actually productive things and I feel guilty for it.
same 😔 like how do we even get outta this sort of thing?
@@saffron1996 Hi I was just watching a psychological reason on why doing more boring tasks is harder and how to make it easier. It surprised me to know that it was the amount of dopamine that your phone releases making you levels go higher and stay that way. Your mind will crave more and more and a detox of the artificial dopamine (social media, pornography, food thats bad for you, etc) to make lower dopamine tasks like cleaning and working easier. I hope this helps you!!! :)
@@saffron1996 boredom will force you. Just shut off your phone, put it somewhere else and bring yourself to just sit in silence until you do the task.
me too
There's no such thing as lazy. Maybe you feel drawn to your phone or computer more because you're understimulated? Have you looked into ADHD, depression or executive dysfunction?
The problem is also that our world is now dependant on this internet. When someone decides to take a break from social media, they miss out on all of the things they would otherwise not be. A break from Instagram usually means a break from our online friends, our favorite influencers, musicians, TH-camr updates they don't post on TH-cam. I've noticed on my leaves from Instagram, I fill in the blanks with Pinterest, with TH-cam videos. And I have got friends, haven't I? The young persons main communication source seems to be Instagram over phone messaging apps. When I delete Instagram, I delete my friends. It isn't so easy to simply stop using these apps as they influence our real world lives that can't seem to function without the internet. When you delete your social media app, the rest of the world keeps on going without you.
Some of my friends don’t even like talking on the phone so contacting them out of the internet is not an option :D
But they would gladly stay on discord for hours. It’s ironic to an extent.
This is a valid point! My friends are the only reason I haven't deleted Instagram, no matter how much I want to. In my personal case, what worked best for me was just, deleting some apps? Like, I got rid of Tiktok and Twitter, a decision I thought for sure was gonna haunt me and I'd end up caving and re-downloading them but strangely enough, going without them was a really good experience, it came to the point that I couldn't actually bring myself to re-download them? It was really confusing because I was sure that I'd hate missing out on updates and content from the content creators I followed on those apps because I loved their posts but once I went a few days without either of those apps, I found it hard to want to return to them??
Of course, I want to specify, I'm still pretty bad! I spend around 8-11 hours a day on social media but that's actually a drastic improvement from when I'd be on tiktok from 10am-3am. I'm still working on getting my time spent on Instagram down but for me, even just deleting a few apps helped my mental health a lot, not spending all your mental energy on drama, controversy and discourse is so much better apparently 😅
This isn't advice however! I'm not telling you that you should do these things, I don't know anything about your personal life, you may not be able to! but I thought I'd just share my piece in this conversation.
University depends so hard on the internet. Nothing can be done without it
I’ve talked about this with my friend, who also has been using instagram less. Because instagram is used a messaging app, it feels like if I never use it again because that’s how most people around me stay in “touch”, kinda like a rebranded concept of facebook somehow. I’ve never really known a life of making friends authentically in person even as a kid bc most ppl would approach me and I was a weird kid. Now I do want to make connections on my own, and I can tell I get inpatient at the fact that friendships take time to build and without knowing how people display themselves on social media, I do not know what knowledge to go off of. I think this relates to me being autistic in a way because it is very hard to not mask around other people and simply mirror them
yeah, and as a war refugee, the only way i can talk to my friends is through my phone.
it feels like a lot of people are realizing this. Emma Chamberlain is someone that comes to mind that is super open about this. i kinda rolled my eyes at first, but after a few days of just doing my hobbies, reading, watching movies, drawing, etc., i realize being on my phone absolutely destroys my mental health. love the video!
This! I can recall a few times where I would leave my phone completely alone and do things like go to the community pool, walk my dog, read a book, write down my thoughts or ideas, watch some movies and do chores etc. It was these types of days I fully enjoyed and it was all because I simply turned off my notifications on social media.
@@roseluv3458 IKR! days where i wasn’t online i felt so much more accomplished because i read a book or finished a drawing. i realized being online was the source to a lot of unhappiness in my life and it’s crazy it took me so long to figure that out.
Social media (and the internet in general) is just so boring and soul destroying in its dystopian-ness but it’s got such a monopoly over everyone’s lives. Quite scary tbh.
I'm trying to break the cycle. . . the dependence I have on my phone as the reality of this is beginning to set in and I could feel the plummet my mental health took as soon as I opened instagram again, its terrifying.
Ever since I graduated high school in 2020 I’ve realised this. Since I’m not really doing anything and I have so much free time, I end up wasting away on my phone every day instead on doing anything meaningful or productive
I kind of wish there was a "no phones" rule at parties/social gatherings. Everyone is always checking their phones and people constantly want to take pictures... ugh
maybe you can make that a rule when you host parties?
Some people do that, like for weddings and such. They'll make a post asking people to keep their phones away at the event and say that they'll have a professional photographer there and all photos will be posted after the event (so no need to take your own)
In defense of photos, it's great to be able to look back on those memories later especially as you grow older imo. I carry a flip phone but still use cameras and the flip phone camera to document my life
Well, go to a coffee shop that is near your or some sort of social place and ask the manager there about making the customers put their phones down and actually talk to other customers. Or start something like that at your own house.
@@causal_internetuser Very good idea because some people just might really appreciate that.
Earlier this week I was in a restaurant alone and i overheard the staff say I was “out of it” because I was “just staring out the window” if I was looking at my phone they wouldn’t have questioned me. It’s now the societal norm to be symbiotic with a cell phone other than nature.
Weird thing for the staff to point out
@@L4w1 yea welcome to modern society. Social skills don’t exist
My question is: how do we stop using social media as much when daily life is so tightly connected to it? When we don't get information about the world from physical paper anymore? Where it is easier and sometimes cheaper to use digital books? I'd love to see what a 21st century world without the internet for a day.
SAME.
i know gen z would basically just shut down like a computer. they wouldnt move for that whole day unless they had to go to the bathroom or something lol
I'm only speaking from personal experience, I'm gen z and I've deleted all social media, I tend to get my news from online news articles, friends, peers and family? It's not perfect but I'm getting pretty much the same quality and quantity of actual important news that I got from being chronically online in 2020 lol.
@@saturationstation1446 Not anymore then any other generation like as a genz I relate to this video but at the same time there's some days were I rarely look at my phone like here was my yesterday
1) Eat breakfast, check phone no scrolling
2) Rehersal
3) 3 hour rehersal, respond to people for 5 minutes during that
4) Go somewhere with my friend
5) Go to her house, eat, go on trampoline
6) Go home, exersise
7) Sleep
I probably had less then 15 minutes of screentime yesterday most of it spent texting my mom
the key is to find balance, it's impossible to avoid it completely
I’ve taken a social media breaks before. One thing I realise whenever l come back online is that I missed nothing. Nothing life changing. Nothing of significant importance. A couple memes or something but nothing valuable. If it’s important you will find out with or with out social media. I repeat, if it’s important you will find out. People will call you if it’s important. They’ll drive to your house, they’ll email you, news networks will notify you, your dad will tell you, your teacher will tell you. If it’s important you’ll find out.
100% agree !
Yes! Same here.
This!
buy a home phone/landline if you are worried about missing important info. that way you can get instant access to important info if you really need it.
Yes! Love this comment
A couple of months ago my gf and I uninstalled our meme app and started forcing ourselves to read. We cleared our porch and started bringing our books everywhere and we read instead of being on our phones. It's been so much more relaxing and when you finish a book you relish in the story and feel accomplished. I never used to be able to read with a lot of noise around me, but I forced myself to when there was and now I can bring my book anywhere anytime and read (with some exceptions). It only took a couple of months to figure it out and it's been amazing, it's like training your brain instead of your body. YOU CAN DO IT TO IF YOU WANT.
Bravo 👏🏻 my husband and I are trying something similar. Back in the day before smartphones really took off I would carry a book with me everywhere. Now I lament how there are still so many books I’d like to read and I just can’t seem to get through them because I just feel this pull to be on my phone. It’s awful. We’re trying though!
@Jacquelyn Roe Heck yeah you guys can do it! Honestly it just helps to carry that book with you everywhere, and a book light, cheap off of amazon then just making that small decision to read instead of looking at your phone. Now I have moments where I'm like "I should have brought my book with me."
Hey, I don’t agree with changing “chronically online” to “extremely online”. It’s very reminiscent of minimizing the existence of internet addiction. Chronic is in relation to persistence, recurrence, and negative impact on the subject. Illness is not intrinsically chronic and chronic is not intrinsically tied to illness. It seems minimalist, a bit reductionist in a similar way to minimizing disability to visible disability.
I agree 100%, it's odd to think that it's an insult as well, especially when it's not even derogatory and if a fact, it's true. It does minimize and may even be enabling.
the intro was scarily accurate to how i feel about my phone and the internet sometimes. i overthink so much and you described how i think so perfectly.
the intro made me delete tiktok (though it is most likely temporary) the realization of how much i use it and how much it has impacted my focus and how i basically cant read a book because of it
@@katieanne1361 deleting tiktok was truly one of the best decisions i’ve ever made. it wastes so much time and it’s nothing but a cesspool of pure negativity and it’s so draining to be on.
Exactly how I feel every single day😬
Fr, especially the part where they said “what if someone needs me?”. Last year I was going through the lowest point of my life due to my online friends attempting to end their lives several times, and I always felt like I HAD to be online. Seeing notifs older than 20 minutes on my phone made me have panic attacks until I read through them all to see if it was bad or not. It wasn’t until I realized I needed to get off social media for a while that my life got instantly better, and I’m slowly recovering from it. Funny how that works huh, as soon as you’re not addicted to social media everything in ur life slows down and feels better?
i can feel it draining ne
You're such a sweetheart for not wanting to offend anyone or contribute to abilist rhetoric, but the word chronic literally just means something persisting for a long time or constantly recurring.
Agreed! As someone who has chronic pain, the term "chronic" is extremely helpful! Please do use :)
This is correct, but I think there's some nuance in what the writer said: if the word "chronic" is used *as a perjorative* they might find it problematic. Chronic as an accurate descriptor is different.
I mean, I'm not in their head, maybe I'm misunderstanding. But that was my take. 🤷
I thought the same thing until I saw in the video that the phrase “terminally online” is used as more extreme version of “chronically online.” Terminal, as far as I’m aware, means either the end of something like a railroad or circuit, or “incurable” / “illness leading to death”. If that’s the case, it seems to make clear that in at least some of the public consciousness, “chronically online” has an illness connotation, and “terminally online” is the natural exaggeration of it. Is there another sense in which the word “terminally” can be used?
@@booksinbed on social media, i have always seen "terminally online" and "chronically online" used interchangably, with users not necessarily distinguishing one as worse than the other.
i personally feel that "chronically" has less of a medical connotation than "terminally" in this context. the internet use being described is literally and fundamentally chronic (long lasting, recurring), but it isn't terminal (at the end of something) by any means. i would say terminally is the more mean spirited one to use, as it implies that to be online is a condition that one will die from.
@@booksinbed terminally online is used to describe what cell phone addicts are doing to their lives when they refuse to acknowledge and treat their addiction. its the same with drug addiction. if you dont stop doing it and keep doing more and more, you die. i have chronic illnesses and stage 3 skin cancer.. but i dont take offense to people using those terms and actually think they need to be used more often. i've seen gen z people who literally cant do ANYTHING without a phone in their hand. thats terminal imo. the phone has just about made its way into your brain and seems to have more control over the person than the person has over themselves.
I used to read 20 books a month, I’m lucky if I can get through one now. Every Sunday when Apple sends me the report of how much I was on my phone, I can’t even open it anymore, it just makes me sick. I’m a mother, I’m a student, I used to be an avid reader/writer who played guitar…now the thought of leaving my house scares me. I hate that I can’t clean the house, put on my makeup, take a shit without my phone near me. It’s been so long since I was able to just sit with myself. Maybe as humans we aren’t meant to have the world at our finger tips, after all, most of humanity lived without it. There are so many great things we can learn but most of us don’t spend our time on our phones learning, we are mindlessly scrolling…
I watch makeup videos instead of doing my own makeup, I watch reading blogs instead of reading, I watch people recommend fanfiction instead of reading them, I watch activism instead of being part of it.
I think I’m going to have a no social media day tomorrow, try to take a break.
You’re not alone . I can’t even shower without having some phone background noise. I am disgusted with the addiction and want a flip phone but as a mom I am nervous about not having google at my fingertips
@@Sobermama927 I feel you! Same with me. I’ve been trying to find a flip phone where my SIM card fits so I can switch back and forth
20 books? lol...of 30 pages?
I had to reduce my screen time because i wanted to start playing guitar again. I was losing focus on writing music as well. I am also slowly getting back to reading books. My screen time each day went from 6 hours to 2 hours a day! I am going to try my best to keep going because i felt a noticeably big difference in my focus, and feel so much better. I wish you the best! Fyi 2 years ago i read 150 books for the year
I am very surprised that nobody is mentioning how car-centric infrastructure and car-centric planning of cities, suburbs, and rural areas that are almost completely unwalkable (ie: very limited sidewalks or bike lanes so people can't even go anywhere without having to drive a fucking car and roads that are increasingly getting wide and nearly impossible for kids, elderly people, and disabled people to cross before the light turns back green because all the roads are filled with traffic, and places like stores, schools, libraries, and parks are so far from walking distance in suburban and rural areas that kids can't even go to these places without having parents drive them to these places) is a HUGE factor, and imo probably even one of the main factors as to why kids are on screens more often than ever, rather than socializing with their peers outside in public places.
And while car-centric infrastructure hurts everyone, for older people, I also think that the increasingly long work hours per week (like it's often going up to 50-60 hours per week of work for many people, if not most people) so a lot of people have very limited free time and energy to partake in hobbies to relax and find enjoyment in (especially if they have families to take care of and other duties they need to follow) and also the 24-hour news cycle that keeps older people addicted to phones as well (especially since the news is often, if not always negative and is constantly shoved into people's browsing time even when they try to avoid the news).
Like, it is not just phone companies, but a variety of systemic factors that are making people too attached to their phones.
This!
I’d also like to mention that I’ve heard from one of those urban planning TH-camrs that the amount of paranoia in American culture surrounding child abduction is astronomical.
@@gt3420 Yeah, rather than worrying about the very unlikely chances of a child being abducted by a stranger (especially since children are EXPONENTIALLY far more likely to be abducted by a parent who does not have custody or someone else that child actually knows), it would make far more sense for parents to be worried about their kids getting hit by cars, especially if they live near stroads or live in unwalkable neighborhoods in general, because a lot of roads, especially stroads, are designed in a way that encourages dangerous and reckless driving at the expense of the pedestrian.
I felt this way too yes! I dont have a car bc i cant afford it right now, so I have to walk to work. Thankfully its not far at all but its fucking dangerous! The crosswalk gives you like 5 seconds before it turns back to green, and the road i have to cross is a 4 lane fucking intersection and i have to watch the light and cars carefully or ill get hit. no sidewalks, tiny ass bike lanes. ive had to deal with this for a while and it makes me sick that society doesnt care about people like me. drivers get mad at me and ive been honked at a few times. i should have the right to choose to walk. even using the ONE crosswalk we have near our house, most drivers dont even wait for me to get thru, even when my light is green and i have the right of way.
omfg yes I was thinking about this the other day!
Here's the funny thing; when I became chronically ill many years ago I stopped using social media and I haven't used it to this day. I couldn't bare to watch all my friends doing fun stuff that I couldn't do any more. My friends slowly stopped inviting me places, so social media just...hurt. Anyway, it really helped me to realise who my actual friends were. As soon as you stop using social media, some people just...forget you actually exist...or worse, treat you like less of a person than their other friends in real life. Its really weird.
suffered from depression during the first wave of the pandemic, so I deleted all my social media and focused more on my relationship with my mom & siblings. after 3 years i literally have no friends. I had like a major friend circle and not 1 of them contacted me. Now I just stay away from everything
Whenever people talk about their online friends I wonder how many of them actually give a fuck about each other beyond boosting each other’s tweets.
Yeah that is true
Huh, it just occured to me that that's when I stopped using it too.
This is exactly what I'm going through now! Over the past year, couldn't bare to watch people going outdoors on hiking, going to festivals, when Im in so much pain just getting out of bed trying to walk my dog, I have my boyfriend help me for so much. Only reason I had to log into my Facebook was to find out more details on a funeral, you feel so out of touch. I have 2 friends that still bother to ask how I'm doing. But yeah I get what you mean completely
Its odd how its a dependance that is okay because to take it serious would require serious work “we dont have time for”
There is no need. Social Media is actually the answer!
Yes I have tried quitting many times. I own a flip phone but I’m not using rn because I fell back into my Iphone since college started (this college uses an app for everything and my laptop is super heavy to carry around everywhere). But when it was the finals I talked to my family I was literally like: I have an addiction , I think I’m dependent on screens. They agreed but never took it seriously. Nobody around me ever took it seriously so it made kinda « okay » to do nothing else.
@@leagirard1053 God you make such a good point about the universities. All I know is when _I_ had a drug addiction, my university, school, workplace, etc. wasn’t still making me use the drug as I was trying to quit while also whining about how “kids are all addicted.” Ya know what I mean?
I was in a psychiatric facility where I was only allowed to have my phone 30 minutes a day and I miss it so much. One of the reasons it worked was because we had community there. Me and the other girls were on our phones only 30 minutes a day and the rest of the time talked to each other, played cards, colored in coloring books, painted, read books, made bracelets, played games, you know engaged in actual hobbies together. We had 2 hours for school work cuz we were still kids but still that doesn’t add much and it was just school work. God I do not miss the ward but I miss having hobbies and community instead of a phone. A big issue with getting rid of my phone is the loneliness. Even when doing hobbies like painting it was nice to have someone to talk to or music playing rather than having to put some random video on my phone to pretend there’s a real person with me and I’m not alone. TH-cam and social media makes my life less lonely as depressing as it sounds.
This is exactly what I keep saying. It's natural that people want to spend all of their free time online if they are lonely and depressed otherwise. I've had mental health issues before social media blew up and back then I'd lock myself into my bedroom and read all day or listen to music. That was escapism, too so it's not a new concept to humanity. Social media is more dangerous than more traditional ways of distracting yourself but both have the same root cause that needs to be addressed on a societal scale. It's not (just) an individual's shortcoming.
It's a loop they created systematically. Just like you, everyone else consumes these due to their loneliness; ironically we do not realize that if we didn't use these as the solution, but rather each other instead, the loneliness would be gone.
We are all using tech constantly because we are alone because we are using tech constantly because we are alone because
Same. I was in a psych ward but we didn’t get phones at all. When I think about why I miss it and want to go back it’s not because I’m in danger and need help, it’s because I didn’t have any access to phone, tv, or any technology and it was amazing. Such a true brain break.
Good idea
A lot of excuses people give for this are like “but I learn so much on the internet! I’m so much more aware now!” and it’s like…are you _really,_ though?
The internet can 100% be a powerful tool for education and its accessibility is great, but how many people are actively trying to learn? Or do you just believe everything you’re told without fact checking at all? How much of that information do you still remember once you’ve moved on?
I'm not really sure if I would consider those "excuses". The internet almost always is an inherent part of education, so automatically you are forced to learn more through that way. But I think even subtly, you gain an awareness of issues that you would have, quite literally, *never* had if you did not have access to the internet.
I think we can really see this in rural areas or in countries where censorship is prevalent (eg. China), where people are hugely ignorant of different races or social issues beyond their own town or even family. Almost always they severely lack any critical thinking, which is especially concerning within a democracy. Hell, literacy rates are the highest they've ever been, and I think technology access is a large part of that due to the ease of education.
I think this discussion in and of itself demonstrates that, sure, while our learning from the internet is definitely not perfect, it's a lot more than without it and so the idea that we do learn a lot from the internet is honestly quite true. It's just admittedly not obvious from our perspectives, since we don't actively search for information, it just kinda comes to us.
I do agree the internet can be educational for studying purposes but sometimes internet isn't always your friend. Example; cancel culture made people overly sensitive and cyberbully celebrities. Political TH-camrs manipulated teens to become negative and toxic. There are videos who criticize evil companies. However, not every company is going to be perfect because humans are flawed. Majority of teens don't know anything about economics and business. Instead of studying economics they watch TH-camrs who generalize that all companies are bad when there is a chance of improving your business.
The internet taught me the importance of critical thinking...specifically because random baseless rumors get passed around.
@@eko9554 Right-wing/alt right political youtube.
not only this but one of the reasons I didn't wanna delete tik tok for the longest was because I had a lot of informative and educational content on my fyp, but the thing is about most educational tweets, tik toks, etc is that they're not memorable
you scroll through so many things in a day that you don't actually remember any of what you learn, like I realized I wasn't actually learning from educational tik tok content because I can't remember hardly any single tik tok I've watched off the top of my head
we’re the first generations with this issue. we’ll never truly get to know all the consequences it will leave on people
and the worse: current mental health professionals have no idea how to help us at all
all generation have this addiction right now. It´s true than gen z is the first one that is living it since they are childs and that´s sad.
@@lavdoria510 the solution is stop using the phone all day long and rehab but it´s difficult and many won´t even try so they will waste their lifes.
Honestly I have been on my phone an obscene amount between entertainment and reading it's a way to not deal with reality. I used to write or read actual books but nowadays not so much. I just don't know how to overcome it.
I used to be pretty detached from my phone until the height of the pandemic. The stress that came from the loneliness of lockdown, as well as from family-related stuff, made me literally unable to read properly (or, sometimes at all)for some time, bc my ADHD/autism, undiagnosed at the time, skyrocketed. Technology provided me with the dopamine/connection to reality I DESPERATELY needed at the time. It helped me discover several aspects of my identity and learn much about the world (especially social issues) so I don't really regret it.
I'm still much more attached to technology than I was before the world ended, but whenever I live home, I deliberately don't take my phone with me, so I basically 100% forget about it's existence until I'm home* again, bc now my sources of dopamine change: the people I'm with, the places I go to, the things I do while in them...
Suggestion: if you can, leave home from time to time, without your phone, and go to a calm place where you can do what you actually want to do. You could also try putting your phone REALLY FAR AWAY from your field of vision while you do tasks with a small dopamine density (e.g reading/writing). Also, if you have an anxiety disorder like I do, don't forget to take your meds, or else doing low-dopamine tasks becomes WAY harder.
*The only moments when i think about my phone while outside are when I'm around things (mainly food) that I think that my online friend from Indonesia would like. He is one of my best buds and LOVES cooking.
@@enbyarchmage You sound like a cool person.
@@chatnoir9038 Thanks, mighty protector of Paris! 😁 Also, some guy named Hawk Moth started appearing in my head since the last time I was sad, and he asked me to go get your Miraculous. I'm not really willing to hurt anyone, so could you please give it to me?
Whenever I’m on my phone to much or scrolling on TH-cam shorts the whole day I just pause on a short and think to myself I’m I going to remember this by the end of the day? Am I going to remember any of the TH-cam shorts I’ve watched today and my answer is always no. This helps me to put down my phone down just checking my messages a couple more times for the day.
get suspended from social media so u have no choice 🙅🏼♀️
I remember last year I was on my phone for 10+ hours a day, I just felt so lethargic. I never talked to my parents, I couldn’t leave my phone alone for more than 5 minutes it felt like an essential part of my life. I’m not like that now but I’ve noticed how being in “reality” makes life feel so much more enjoyable, I feel better about myself and I’ve found much better hobbies that I’ve found I enjoy more than being online
I think one massive side effect of phone addiction is what I’m going to call ‘Irl Tinder culture’, where people often immediately reject each other based on looks, or the very first thing they disagree on or don’t like about the other person. This is best reflected by the TH-cam webseries The Button, which is on the channel The Cut. It’s maddening because it’s so accurate in showing how so many people, probably bc of Tinder and other dating apps, have taken the superficiality of those apps and the ‘swipe left’ mentality into their daily lives. Not that all people are like that or anything (I know there’s plenty of people who aren’t), but still, it’s concerning
Excellent point!
got a flip phone last year as a 17 year old. cannot even begin to describe the wonders it did to my mental health and surprisingly my relationships.
I wish we could all go back to flip phones
@@simpressed5756 why all of us?
You're doing great! Do you just have a regular digital camera for pics or do you find yourself just not taking them anymore?
@@eyestotheskies i ended up taking a lot less pics generally but the pictures i do have from the flip phone came out surprisingly good! and yeah, i used a digital camera whenever i was doing something i knew i wanted to document :)
i absolutely love this for you!
I literally became so lazy because of my phone. I dont want to read, study because i want to only play games and hang around on social. It is awful.
I can't say it's because of phone. People procrastinated way before phones. They just read some (shitty) books, newspapers, maybe playing with each other some games (which is not way better than playing on phone in my opinion).e
@@Sha-1 but it is. These apps, like slot machines, are designed with the help of neurologists to be maximally addicting, to keep us scrolling and scrolling and scrolling so that they can sell ads for more and more money. It’s literally being done to us on purpose
Doesn’t help that those activities give the same amount of entertainment (if not more) for significantly less effort involved. Not that no one should read or anything, but the nature of these things is definitely working against us
I'd like to contribute my experiences with this.
I'm gen z, older than 13 but younger than 18. I got addicted so badly that I would conceal my phone and take it up to bed with me, even when my parents would tell me not to. Even when they found out. Even when they got me to promise to not do it again. Even when they'd ask me to leave both of my devices downstairs with them. It was horrible, but it was like I couldn't stop. I hated lying and continuing to do what only made me happy for a few seconds and then only made me miserable afterwards. It's terrible to think that one incident with a parent of mine ended up with them asking me to give them the phone (in my hand) and I wasn't able to; I ended up crying because I just couldn't.
It gets ingrained into our heads, this behaviour, after a while of using them. It becomes something you feel compelled to do. I don't think quarantine helped at all - there was no distinction between school and tech, home life and tech, socialising and tech. No clubs or classes to go to, just. Just tech. It sometimes felt like the only thing you could do; it kept people entertained when they had nothing else, so much so that they came to depend upon it.
And the physical and mental effects are crushing. Your eyes feel like sandpaper whenever you blink and everything is too bright, so much so that it stabs into your eyes whenever you open them. Doesn't look pretty either: you strain your eyes so you get loads of red veins across them and really dark eyebags. Your paranoia just gets worse and if you didn't have it then you develop it. You become more depressed, irritable, anxious - waking up every day with a heart that's galloping in your chest and you don't know why. Your vision blurs. You become more clumsy (nearly fell down the stairs once) and sometimes you get migraines. It's torture. It's like any addiction. But it isn't treated as one by many, especially people who have the authority to help change things.
And there are children who are developing this. Children younger than me - 6,7,8,9-year-olds. They are being put through the same torture I have managed to escape from. I know people at my highschool who are like this, like I was, and they don't see it as a problem: they just think it's normal. It's fine. What else would they be doing?
We need to spread the fact that technology is absolutely addictive and that it should be treated carefully. If it's addictive, then there are going to be addicts. And no, it's not normal, or fine, or just what everyone does - we need to stop downplaying the issue. People like me need help and resources, just like anyone struggling with addiction would. Yet most of the world doesn't see it that way.
Tysm for this
My phone is right next to my bed to ensure I don’t forget it for school. I deleted TikTok, and now it’s less of a temptation for me. I’m fixing my sleep schedule, and I’m overall less miserable.
you are so right about the eyestrain and anxiousness
crazy to see other people are going through this too :(
i really don't want to sound dramatic or anything this comment almost made me cry 😭 i feel EXACTLY the way you do. Tech addiction is treated as a norm in today's society whereas it is just like any other addiction. i've lost a lot of passion for things i really used to love and overall i feel so much more depressed and anxious than i used to be. but the worst part is that i feel like i can't do anything about it. in a world so dependent on technology it's weird if you don't own a phone, it's weird if you don't have instagram, it's weird if you haven't heard abt xyz etc. people will treat you as an outlier if you dont use the internet. in the coming years i hope more people are made aware of the affects of this and that actual help is put in place, but seeing how the past 2 years have unfolded it seems like it will only get worse =(
When I was younger, my mindset was "when I get away from my strict parents, I'll finally get a life away from my phone". Now, I'm an adult, and I've realised noone ever taught me how to have a life away from my phone
i have a very weird relationship when it comes to phones/technology; from ages 14-18 i was never allowed to use the internet or a cell phone (very very religious conservative parents etc) and got my first phone at 18. before then i was CONSTANTLY reading or creating something. now i've developed such a deep addiction to it that i have lost my sense of identity, and don't even feel as though i have one online. i am so disassociated from myself and i hate it. i usually let my phone die for this reason.
I relate, kind of. I grew up with unfettered access to tech. I still chose to read books, draw, write, and get out of the house even just to ride my bike to nowhere in particular.
Something changed in the last 5 to 8 years and my phone has replaced all of those hobbies (or had, it's not so bad now, I've been working on it.)
My life itself didn't really change, I did lose a lot of friends, but I made plenty of new ones, I didn't use new kinds of websites or apps/programs. But something in the way they're presented to us has changed, I think. And they've found the addiction factor that facebook is so known for, it's been formulated now.
Like I was a very internet oriented teen, spent hours chatting on MSN Messenger, days on Crunchyroll (way back before they went legit and it was a 50/50 that any episode or series was going to remain on the website or if Shinji would get sued to take it down) and weeks on RuneScape. I knew all the weird side of TH-cam. I even spent a fair bit of time on forums like 4chan back before Moot sold it. But it was just something to idly do when I was between books, in the evening when there wasn't really anything better to do, it wasn't constantly on my mind.
I used to be a drug addict, really badly, and the way some websites and apps feel these days... it's reminiscent of heroin and morphine, or crack, or any other addictive drug, because it's there, itching away at your mind, begging you to cave in and go "okay maybe just one more puff"
i can kind of relate i grew up with many restrictions on my phone i couldnt get certain apps i couldn’t look up certain things and now that i have the freedom to look up what i want and download whatever apps i want i’ve become addicted to my phone
Absolutely the same. I'm 20 now and moved out on my 18th birthday. I always thought to myself, once I'm able to do what I want, I'll be so happy. Now it has me in a grip.
i relate completely!! when i was younger i felt so genuinely content creating and writing things and i used to do it a LOT; but now.. even though i really want to do it all again, i feel like i've forgotten how to.
@@del9100 i think, at least for me, with everything involving social media, I've become more focused on being good at doing things i enjoy that i can no longer enjoy it
The technology addiction sweeping the world is so scary and I’ve noticed lately how the dependence of our smart phones has been pushed on us in so many ways -for example, I was at a friends a few weeks ago when my phone died and they had no charger, I went to log on to my email and college website to do some work etc-but I couldn’t log into either because they wanted to verify it was me by texting a number verification to my phone!! Can you believe it?? You can’t log into your own email with your smart phone! It’s probably a setting you can change but it’s still ridiculous. I didn’t get any work done that day.
If I didn't have access to my smartphone, I literally couldn't do my taxes because the tax office will only let you lodge them online now, and will only let you log on with 2 factor authentication, and it HAS to be your phone number.
I HATE this stupid overuse of twostep verification that's going on right now. It's totally nuts. Why would I just happen to have my phone turned on and right next to me at all times!
@@SpecialBlanket Not just that, it's literally pointless. If someone gets my phone and knows enough about me to guess (or hacks) any of my passwords, they've got access to my verification anyway. They immediately have EVERYTHING. And it's not exactly impossible to redirect or intercept messages with the right equipment and know-how.
I'd prefer if we just stick to messages and emails notifying us of attempted access, or successful access, so we can act on it.
Like all they need to do is set up a virtual sim that uses my phone number and voila, access codes.
The increasing encryption is very problematic for a) anonymity literally anywhere and b) poor and homeless people as the material resources to exist in wider society are increasing constantly. It means you go from people needing a house, to needing a house and formal wear for work, to help to get banks to register them, to not being able to use buses and many shops, almost anything really without banks first agreeing to a credit card(which usually requires an address so is hard), to phones and laptops and chargers and access to Internet cafes or such... It's extremely classist and often anti roma/travellers/other nomadic folk in many areas.
@@Jane-oz7pp I'd say the point is very much build up barriers not make hacking impossible, but by this point we're putting up with as many barriers to access as anyone malicious.
I went to a group therapy retreat that was digital detox and you check your phone at check in. People were saying they kept automatically reaching for their phones for the first day. By the third day everyone had fully relaxed. It was crazy.
The main reason for my internet addiction is extreme loneliness. I'm an adult woman with strict parents so I can't socialize the same way other people in their early twenties can. Dating is too difficult as I would have to hide it. I have a strict curfew so socializing is always such a task. I also have terrible sun allergies and ADHD.
The religious trauma isolates me from the friends that I have. As understanding as they are, I still feel like none of them will ever know what's it's like. An anonymous social media presence helps me find people with similar experiences, whereas it would be extremely difficult to find people who are so willing to talk about it since I live in a pretty conservative town.
I think in the real world, we're still bound by the culture and traditions of our parents. There is the expectation to mask your emotions to avoid making people uncomfortable. There is a huge disconnect between the ideals of my community and my own ideals/aspirations. Which is why I always felt uncomfortable around people in my community, even as a child that didn't have the internet. There is an openness to anonymously using the internet that you cannot find anywhere else. You can lay out all your anger, despair, dreams, and aspirations without any real life consequences.
Reading this, it almost felt like I could have typed the whole thing out myself. Are you me?!
Damn...
This spoke to me so much,We are so similar, I too have very strict parents and strict curfew and myself too deal with heavy religious trauma(Islam),I hope you heal and enjoy life the way you wish to
i’ve gotten to the point where i have stopped using social media completely except pinterest and youtube and it’s amazing. The amount of stuff that only exists on the internet but doesn’t once u delete it is astonishing. i rlly don’t care about random strangers and that’s how it should be
Glad I'm not the only one because I love TH-cam and Pinterest they're amazing!!
same, I only use pinterest and youtube but I still have ab addiction to my phone. :/
@@suraya_ phones are part of our every day lives so I understand that ..it just makes it harder when we have these toxic apps on there
@@suraya_ limit your screen time and do something else without your phone around
Yes me too I don't use Insta or tik tok
I just know this is gonna give me so much anxiety……. I cant wait.
Here for too babe haha
Gonna have to save this one for later 😭
Literally my exact reaction, I don’t post much, or even comment (like I’m doing right now) very often, so that aspect of the video didn’t get to me at all.
But when it became really personal, I literally had an anxious meltdown because it hit way too close to home.
I try so hard to take time away, because I have recently recognised that this is not healthy behaviour, but I have Autism Spectrum Disorder and Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder, making it literally impossible.
I have to use my phone for regulation a lot of the time, so that I can multitask or so that I can get dopamine whilst doing tasks because of my natural lack of dopamine in my brain.
It scares me so badly that I have to live like this when it is perceived as something bad, and I literally had to quit this video halfway through because I got that anxious.
I absolutely love Shaniya’s videos but one thing that I wish they could’ve explored more in this video is how technology affects neurodivergent people in particular, especially with those with disorders making them naturally deprived of dopamine.
I really appreciated how they discussed chronically ill people having to be reliant on technology though, because it is a real issue that I am sick of being left out of the conversation.
@@TheCatOfTruth143 I couldn’t understand you more, i also have ASD and I am also struggling with my phone addiction, it helps me function and regulate. Keeps me in contact with those I love. It helps me keep up with my special interests, it also can calm me during meltdowns and it just provides me with a community that isn’t where I live. I know it’s bad and I’m trying to cut back, I hope that I can reach a balance one day 😅
Also yeah! It would be awesome to see how it also affects neurodiverse folks like us but just reading your comments meant a lot to me.
🌸You’re not alone!!🌸
It's nice to see Kurtis Connor recommend this video to his fans 👏🏻
the side of this im most interested in is how mental health and loneliness interact and how that isnt our fault. the phone isnt the problem, just like how the pills arent the problem. we are living in a empty, car dependent world and we are addicted to our phones bc they seem like the only way to soothe our pain.
what you said is true, but also, the phones divide us further and make it harder to connect in person and do real hobbies/activities with people
i have a hate love relationship with my phone, it helps me escape reality but steals my time. it's horrible
Same
I spend maybe 6 hours on my phone a day, with clear timers and set times to set "away" times so no one worries about me. through 2019-2021 I definitely had a serious addiction to technology as a way to cope and process things but I am getting better at it now. and hell. it's still hard. but with ADHD/autism it's hard to not have "background" noise. because background noise is something I already have, just not in a way I can handle it safely and productively. I notice that it definitely affects my family and how we are .
I love technology and the way I can use it to express my differences, and my creativity, but it doesn't control me very well. I forget about it. and that's ok.
yes! i also am audhd, and i need background noise often to mutter the chatter in my brain. i think it’s the fact that i’ll take a loooong time choosing music/podcasts/videos that i get distracted again and defeat the purpose
I get that too, even if it just using white noise I can't just use plain white noise and get distracted looking for something like that.
Felt. Pretty certain I have ADHD, and it takes considerable focus/effort in order to get my brain to quiet down. Which means I can't focus on what I'm doing! So I'm usually listening to music or something like this video essay. Keeps me on track if I'm thinking about something else and doing stuff
I have ADHD and autism. I've just gotten into knitting, and it's a great alternative when you are doing something like watching a video or listening to a podcast. It's very satisfying to create something physically, wonderfully sensory, and very relaxing. I'm not personally into audiobooks, but if you struggle with concentrating on books you could also try knitting while listening to an audiobook. Would really highly recommend it to anyone who struggles in this way. (I was knitting while watching this video)
@@cloudfrost8403 mhm! I crochet and it's very good for videos like this. I learn while I make.
It's also very hard _not_ to be chronically online when you're gen z, as everyone expects you to be. Everyone encourages you to be.
You have to know the latest movie, you have to know about the latest politics, etc.
If you want to separate yourself from all that (as I have been trying to recently), then it can be lonely as you relate less and less with people your age, and even dangerous as you can accidentally offend people (e.g. by listening to an artist who has been cancelled since you left Twitter). That's something you'll have to accept.
okay i just remembered my conversation with my dad about being online. I told him that it's hard NOT to be online because it's a whole different plane of reality happening at the same time as "real life" and that if I got involved in some online drama/got ostracized online, I wouldn't be able to escape it and I'd like to be informed if something like that happened. And then he said "well if you weren't online you wouldn't even know you're being ostracized" and I was like... that's actually true... I can literally not know and not care what's going on online!
The other person was this one Polish queer activist who said they don't treat internet drama and hate as real hate, that they only care about things that are happening to them in real life and it also opened my eyes. Yeah, internet hate hurts, but that's all it is, people typing vicious things from the safety of their homes... and they would never be brave enough to say such nasty things in your face. So why care about it at all?
so you used to take things people said on the internet to heart? I thought it was common sense to not give a damn
@@eridiance9818 maybe it was common sense, but I guess it's also a natural human reaction to feel touched by the things people say to you, no matter if it's irl or online. :)
I don’t feel like it’s just phones that cause this issue. Last year, I felt so much stigma by people about phones that I only used it like 30 min a day. To fuel my online addiction, I would use my computer instead. I think that in the place of “don’t use your phone so much” “touch grass” we need to promote hobbies that aren’t super “instagrammable” (which is another problem). People will pick up a book, take a picture of it, and post it on social media, pretending they are so well versed.
computer is a bit better because it isnt as easy to hack and all that stuff. its also a lot harder to take everywhere with you so you can develop a healthier relationship with it. phones are like ultra clingy partners. except they are also there solely for exploiting you to extract money from you. computers do far more than that and are generally not used for social media most of the time they are in use.
this is what i do! i feel like with my computer i can easily just take a break and pick up a book or help out around the house.
Ugh don’t get me STARTED on Instagram hobbies. I have to actively fight with myself to discern what hobbies I’m actually interested in and what hobbies I would just be doing because you look cool while doing them.
yeah but everything is instagramable or one or another way monetizable on internet. I stopped doing puzzles because someone said I should make videos out of it and post on internet. at that moment it became a chore, a work for me. i never did puzzle again. i felt guilt for not doing it properly in order to monetize that activity.
that is something a person who’s addicted to their phone would say...
I really needed this video, I’ve been wanting to delete social media for about a year now. I got my first phone when I was 10, I’m 17 now and all I do is scroll on my phone I also didn’t know that extensive social media usage could affect cognitive function. After watching this I went to delete all social media, I was instantly worried if I’d miss something from my online mutuals or if I won’t know what jokes my friends are sending to our instagram group chats It’s really eye opening how much social media has taken over my life. Thank you.
I feel the same way. I have never had any social media other than TH-cam and I don’t think I ever will, at school my friends would be talking about some cute guy from tiktok or be doing the dances and when I would say I didn’t have tiktok and they would be in total shock filling me in on everyone and everything it was so overwhelming because I had thought I missed SOOO MUCH mind you I was in middle school when I didn’t even have a phone I’m now 15 and have one though I’m definitely more mindful of the consequences of being so attached to something that by the end of the day you forget half of what you watched.
I will say it’s a nice step to take. I was scared leaving my circles on discord bc i thought i would be missing out, but probably only 2 months after i did that i wouldn’t have been able to name 5 of my “mutuals” unless i really thought. It’ll be a year (I think?) soon and i don’t miss any of them at all. Take the step. You’ll be much happier
I have a similar story, I got a phone at 9! Honestly, at first I didn't delete social media for my health but just to remove the apps I wasted the most time on but ever since deleting tiktok, twitter, etc, I've felt so much better?? I thought for sure that I'd be craving to go back to them but now that I'm not so obsessively online anymore, I've never been so healthy? I can actually read books again and I don't really care about online discourse anymore, now whenever I see an influencer I've never heard of getting caught tweeting something problematic I just put down my phone and do something else.
TLDR; Definitely the right choice to get rid of social media, my mental health has never been better 😅
Same! I literally deleted most of my social media accounts in the past month and I feel so much better. I do still feel like I’m missing out on a lot of what my friend group is doing and our friendship is fragile rn, but it was a huge step up for my mental health so I can’t even be mad at them lol
Just to add my 2cents, I deleted social media a year ago and about 6 months in I was feeling so so much better that I decided I'll check in and download/log into ig just to see what's up and if I have messages. After literally 20 mins of scrolling I was feeling so awful and had a panic attack on my kitchen floor Trisha paytas style, my room mate was like omg wtf happened 🤣 I can laugh at it now but wow I deleted it again and it took me months to get back to the progress i had made.
Tldr: if you want to stay in touch with online friends just give them your number so you can whatsapp/text and at least whatsapp has stories too so it's like a mini version of ig with less toxicity and you only see close friends stuff so it's much better
Deleting social media at 16 and only really using youtube half an hour in the morning (and slightly scattered throughout the day on my tv to watch reading videos to motivate me to read more and when i make bracelets etc) and turning to reading more has helped me SO much. Social media feels like a massive trap, and yes i still listen to music and text my friends but i still feel so much better than being stuck in a cycle of social media
I broke my phone and was forced without it for a week and I wasn’t having cravings to occupy my mind constantly , but instead I had this strong feeling of disconnection. Even though all my friends were still within reasonably distance, I felt FOMO. Almost like I wasn’t living in the same reality as them anymore
As an old boomer (with a pretty severe edu-tainment addiction), I've watched the rise of smart phones (and social media in general) with an outsiders interest. I tried social media and gave it up (we can debate YT - I experience it as enhanced TV; this sort of engagement being the enhancement). I've been able to relate to the whole addiction aspect, maybe because I never enjoyed it. I wonder how this research breaks down along generational lines.
Keep up the great work! I love your content - you do a great job of helping this old boomer understand what's going on.
Likewise. It's hard for me to fully grasp the mindset of people who grew up with this technology as the norm. I know it's more powerful than it seems, because of the level of misinformation and flaws in popular conventions. I'm fine with a solar flare knocking it out for a while. 💜
@@jasonjacoby The part that I find saddest is that when in public, people use it as a way to avoid talking to other people - and THAT is the norm now. I think that is a real loss for us as a society as a whole. We don't interact, so we don't get know that most of us are more alike than different. We are becoming ever less trusting of those around us because we can avoid them with our phones.
there are definitely terminally online boomers. they are mostly white supremacist terrorists tho. not being hyperbolic about that. i used to track large groups of them a couple years ago and they actually post as much or more than millennials and gen z. however they mostly post racist memes and rarely comment on things unless they are trying to bully a vulnerable person. i've seen (and reported) a boomer who posted a video of a black teenager getting run over and killed by a semi truck. facebook said it was acceptable content for their website tho. it honestly seems like its ONLY the terrorist boomers who use the internet that much tho. i havent seen many boomer chronic users who just do normal people stuff.. but its definitely their favorite place to go to bully people they perceive as vulnerable. i think thats because they would get their butts whooped if they said the stuff IRL
@@saturationstation1446 Ugh! People like that make me even sadder. I don't do FB or any of it's ilk, like I said - largely because of stuff like that. The comments sections can get nasty from time to time - more the news sites, where - meh - that's just people looking for conflict.
Just wanna say, as a millennial, I really appreciate seeing older generations being in Shanspeare's audience. 😊 She always provides such great insight and touches on such important topics that I wish more people sat through. So just wanna take a minute to appreciate you, your participation, and open mind 🙌🏼 hope you have a good day, Justin
Ps: I like that "YT is like enhanced TV". I feel very similarly!
i have adhd and spending such a big amount of time on my phone has an enormous impact on my life. my attention span constantly shrinks and i can't manage mundane activities without some technological input. i dissociate so much and whenever there's an issue i resort to escapism. oddly enough my wake-up call was watching evangelion. now I'm trying to get better but it's hard.
My sister has ADHD and she constantly has her wireless earbuds in playing TH-cam in the background of basically everything she does except showering. I don't think it can be good for her brain.
Kinda same I have adhd too and I use my phone all the time I constantly have something playing in the background except when I’m showering or sleeping and it’s getting to a point where I can’t cope with real life anymore, when I’m without my phone I’m anxious, depressed, dissociating and overthinking all the time, my mental health is getting so much worse without it when it’s already bad with it (and my attention span literally doesn’t exist anymore)
This is my problem as well. I feel like my adhd symptoms have gotten worse due to the fact that I’m addicted to the technology in my life. I’m aware of this but it’s gonna take a lot more than awareness to heal myself…
@@DE-fx3xp setting app timers and seeing your daily screen time on your home screen helps. i personally try to think about all those childish things that i enjoy and instead of feeling embarrassed i kind of just try them out. it could be anything small like playing around with slime or just looking at your old things and remembering why they're important. i know it isn't easy but asking for help from a professional is also an option. good luck
Man, having ADHD in today’s age is crippling. The amount of energy it takes me to try and get through the _several_ chapters of dense material covered in most college textbooks is absolutely exhausting. I have no free time because the free time other’s have that I ideally would have is spent trying to get work done. It’s very discouraging
This is exactly why I’ve taken a break from social media. I realized that I would waste hours of my day with mindless consumption of useless, distracting media. I don’t worry about what anyone else has going on and I’m really able to live in my own world
Respect
@@indiald3373 I appreciate your comment
I have adhd and struggle with focusing on one thing for a longer time. You kept me engaged for full 32 minutes !! That is a massive achievement, I love your videos
Alternative title: Shanspeare calling us out for 32 minutes and five seconds straight
One thing I’ve been thinking about dog piling and “cancelling” is that there are different rules for online vs IRL and for common people vs public figures. There’s something to be gained from a public figure posting any good/bad take online so we are quick to scrutinise for example. For a person we know IRL we can come back to them at a later point if we feel wronged and we can know their heart better when they say/post smthing which could be misunderstood by a stranger.
I can’t articulate it well right now, but I think there’s some logic and reason why we are acting a little high and mighty online and it has its place sometimes.
Think it's because we have distance emotionally to public figures online and, if they're famous, IRL. We don't know what's really going on or who they are in private compared to friends and family and even acquaintances irl and online.
(random experience i had that i thought was kinda related to ur comment) i have this classmate whomth i despise. never have i stood up to him once. but if this guy was online i know myself enough that id bully him off the internet. for me personally its just that im a coward. plain and simple. i have more to risk irl than online where no one knows me.
Public figures have a much greater ability to influence the thoughts of other people, they have power over people and need to be responsible with it so they should be held to a higher standard. The average person having a bad take doesn't have nearly the same impact.
@@tims5978 literally me. so forgiving irl that it makes me question where my real morals really lie
I absolutely get this. Sometimes I’ll talk online with friends about a celebrity that can be semi-problematic and feel like i’m getting dog piled, but in real life when I talk about the same thing I feel like people are much more open to understanding. It’s so odd because I feel like I can’t like someone without someone being like “oh yeah, do you like what they did when they did this kinda problematic thing?” like obviously i do not support that, but i do like the person. i don’t have to support everything someone does just because they’re an idol. it’s the same with people in real life, but everything seems so polarizing. glad this is a place we have a discussion about this issue :)
I'm a 30-something y/o that stopped using social media for a year and it CHANGED MY LIFE. It really legit did. The thing is, being dependent on it is just simply a habit. It's a habit most of us refuse to break because we feel that in this day and age, we are connected to all of our friends, family, and even businesses through social media. Yes, even though we are connected through social, it is still all just EXCUSES to stop yourself from breaking a habit. Once I came back to social media, I no longer depended on it. In fact, it made connecting to my friends and family a lot more natural and meaningful. Instead of just sending "LIKE OMG LOL" posts to my friends, I now send thoughtful updates and have actual conversations through text and DMs. Instead of just sharing memes mindlessly with my friends, who really, probably DO NOT CARE about them..... I now share important updates, things that I think are worth talking about, etc.
The truth is, yes, we're all ONLINE. That is fine. I live very far away from my friends and family because I moved to the other side of the country to be with my boyfriend. And I can really only communicate with them through DMs or text. That is all okay. But the difference is that, after I took a break, I just didn't feel addicted and no longer felt like if I wasn't logging on and scrolling through feeds, I'd be missing out. I simply didn't care if I missed out. I became too busy trying to better my own life and focus on my own issues. And when I felt like diving deeper into societal issues or what's happening in the world, I DECIDE to check in when I feel mentally ready to.
Stop making this excuse that if you're not on social media, you disconnect from everyone you know. There is a healthy way to connect and stay connected. The problem is that 90% of Gen-Z and Millennials don't do it in a healthy way. They are completely addicted and make every excuse in the world to keep staying addicted.
As a thirty something yr old who also removed myself from social media for a, I 100% agree
I began to realize last year that my problem with procrastination was because I spent too much time on Twitter, TH-cam, Instagram or any other app that was time-consuming. Even Wikipedia. I knew that my anxiety was derived by social media, which, in turn, led me to procrastinate and led me to more anxiety. I talked to my girlfriend about it, and we saw this video and Kurtis' video and we were inspired to change. I wanted to give a rest, put my phone away, block all apps that were distractive. It worked: Immediately I saw that my anxiety started to be more normal. My girlfriend said the same thing. Not only that, but my procrastination almost ceased. I started to be more productive on my work/studies, I started reading books again, I began staying off the phone and enjoying more of life. Sure, sometimes I am procrastinating (like I'm doing now), but it's much controlled now. I feel like I'm in control of myself.
As someone who spend TOO MUCH time on their phone you really reflect and realize how much time you spend on your devices. Especially when people tell us “hey get off your phone” it’s very hard since using it is in our reality in this day and age. Yesterday Canada had a Internet outage with Rogers and I remember how I was desperate to get connection two other use my phone for spending time or actually something important every single café, mall etc was packed with people. It’s kind of a perfect example of how a outage can be basically be doomsday since EVERYONE USES THERE PHONE. Very interesting video and it was nice to listen and realize
omg yesterday I was so anxious... and at the same time, I know being online worsen my anxiety LOL
those who dont live in unsafe situations shouldnt get that upset about not having internet connection lol. but for those that are in dangerous situations, the internet is protecting them more than police ever could or would (unless they are rich of course, then cops will send like 50 people to guard your house if someone makes a threat against you lol)
This was so well put-together, and I really appreciated your consideration of people who are forced into more dependence on the internet. I’m disabled and in the last few years have had little choice in moving a lot of my life onto phones and tablets. Whether I’m socializing, taking a class, self-studying, reading a book, enjoying music, etc., I often have to use an internet-connected device because I’m not physically able to go to a coffee shop or lecture hall, to put on a record, nor sit up with a textbook. It’s super hard for me to touch grass, lmao. I’m isolated, and much of the disability community is ‘happening’ on social media, as well.
When all that interacts with how these devices, apps, and sites are intentionally addicting, it makes things extremely challenging for me to moderate. I try to take all kinds of defensive actions, like reading on an ereader, not posting to social media, and uninstalling or setting time limits on apps. But I still constantly feel the compulsion to leave what I’m doing and roll the dice with a news or social media feed. It’s always just a few taps away.
All of this! Being disabled adds a whole other dimension to our relationship with the internet
This is so real and important. I'm partially and temporarily disabled due to a microdiscectomy and nerve damage in my right leg. I rely on buses to get around and get things done, but now it's difficult because I get tired and also scared to lose my balance and risk needing surgery again. So, I'm unable to get out, meet friends, go to events, ect. TH-cam has become my source of companionship because it makes me feel less alone if that makes sense. Without it, I think I'd feel distressed and detached which scares me. Also, thank goodness for teletherapy.
as an asian girl with tiger parents im not allowed to go out like my peers and everything i have to study for exams are on online uni sites.. so i cant really get rid of my phone
I’m a coach and whenever a kid mentions they don’t have a phone, I say, “Good.” And they’re always confused. And then I explain, “Don’t feel pressure to have social media or a phone. Enjoy life as you have it. The internet is cool, but it’s not the end all be all.”
I *just* commented on a video of a concert about what a vibe killer it is that 95% of people in the front of the crowd are filming on their phones and the responses I got were interesting. Some people, who seemed super young to me, were claiming that it's no big deal to be looking back and forth between your phone and the stage every few seconds for the whole show and "doesn't even ruin the moment." it made me wonder how many people who have grown up with smart phones from a young age have literally no idea what they're even missing when doing these behaviors. One of the main arguments for filming an entire concert is apparently "I have a bad memory." And I can't help but wonder how many people who make this claim think that your memory is "bad" if you can't replay the whole show in your head like a video, because they're so used to "memories" being stored in recordings. Like yeah you won't remember every moment or even most of the moments- but you'll remember how it felt, and you'll remember the biggest moments better if you're actually living them when they happen. idk. It all just made me feel like people are increasingly disconnected from what just existing as a human without a phone is like.
The whole recording videos/taking photos for memories thing is so scary to me. I was on vacation with my mom last year and when I asked her not to take a picture/video of me and just let me enjoy the moment she said she had to or I wouldn’t remember it, and it didn’t help that losing important memories is already one of my biggest fears. I love recording videos, I love editing videos, I want to have some sort of career with videos even, but the expectation that you have to take videos or photos to remember anything still scares me
@@iamobsessedwithshadowsight yeah u don’t need photos to remember memories, but some people really do love to look back on their memories through photos. There are specific places in vacation I went to years ago that I forgot about until I saw a photo on it. My parents have photo albums and I love looking through them seeing the places they went to and took me to when I was like 2 or 3 and don’t remember anything from then. Don’t think about it too much. Photos can be great just take one if you want to, don’t try to think photos are needed but don’t avoid them altogether because of what your mom said. I think the bigger problem is nowadays people take photos to show off on social media, not for actual keepsake.
yes, i think snapping a photo every once in a while or recording a snippet of a song is okay, but the way people will record basically half or the entire concert on their phone is just insane to me. if you are gonna watch it all through a screen, then don’t go and just watch it on youtube😭
I'm only 22 but I am so grateful I grew up without smartphones and constant internet for the first half of my life. If I go to a concert or some other event I might take 1 or 2 photos at the very beginning of the night for posterity but then I put my phone in my bag and just enjoy the experience. I've always had a very good memory and can sort of replay memories in my mind like a video so maybe that's why.
@@tinyfreckle it's a real gift for parents to give their children these days to stand firm on tech overexposure imo. BUT I have a warning for anyone who grew up "unplugged" - we tend to think we'll keep our good habits for life but it's completely possible to become screen addicted when you're older too! My parents are boomers and in the past few years suddenly they can't even watch TV without ALSO using tablets/laptops at the same time. I'm way worse about screen addiction since the pandemic too. So if you have good habits, guard them carefully! It's easier to keep them than to get them back
Just earlier today I saw a tiktok where the creator was giving tips on how to lessen a phone addiction and I saw so many comments of people saying that their phone addiction doesn't really matter because they have nothing better to do... it was so depressing to read.
honestly yeah. i hate being on my phone but I literally have nothing better to do. I'm really good at not being on it when I've got something to keep me busy (like helping my mom out at her school) but when I'm sitting at home I can't make myself do anything else other than sit on tiktok. I hate tiktok it's not even good. I've tried deleting it but i always end up reinstalling after uni busy-ness is over because i cant find anything better to do now that essays aren't taking up all my time. its infuriating!
I know right
Its mad how right that feels
When i tell you i was addicted to social media, i mean it. I would sit on tiktok from 8 am in the morning to 4 am, with breaks for food where id watch it there too. In the bathroom, at school, every where. When i ended up deleting it a few days ago, im literally going through withdrawl.. its sad to me. Im depressed and ended up crying and even started thinking about self injury, (luckily i just took a shower and it helped lmao). I cant believe the impact it had on me at only 13
I'm so sorry for you, no one ever deserves to go through that
It's quite gross how apps are designed to make us addicted. I always have notifications off and no sound/vibration for my phone. My screentime is still insanely high so I put a timer on my apps and will see how that goes
deleting them and using the sites only on browser has helped me a lot you could try that
My job requires me to be on my phone almost all day so I'm on my phone way too much. I am a huge believer of putting it away in social situations though. It drives me crazy when I'm with someone and they're messaging someone else or scrolling through Facebook.
SAMEE I'm a publicist, being online is literally my job. I need to know what is going on in the world so the companies that hire me can profit of that.
same, i have to be on the computer while making/taking calls 8 hours a day but if im out with people my phone is on silent and put away
i don't feel dependent on my phone at all, perhaps because i didn't get a smartphone until i was 14, i just use it as a regular phone, an alarm or to check internet things quickly if necessary. but i do spend a lot of my free time watching shows, playing games and searching things up on my desktop computer. i feel like it's technology that connects me to things that make me feel inspired. i just try to ask myself if i'm really enjoying what i'm doing, if i'm doing something purposefully, if i'm learning something, and i guess that keeps me from feeling the time i spent was wasted.
I used a flip phone until nearly the end of college 😬 One time I said that I didn't have a smartphone in a communications class and everyone was shocked lol. For me, sites like youtube make me feel connected and give me the opportunity to tap into new things.
ah, that was around the same time i got a tablet! i had a texting phone till high school [15], and i make sure my phone always has a slot for extra storage and earbuds. before then, i only played arcadey games in my phone, and found ways to have my music offline too. i tried to do gacha stuff like everyone else, but my phone is my social media/music player/arcade cabinet/ereader only. not a casino.
I guess time you enjoyed isn't time you wasted
I didn't get a smartphone till I was 15 but now I'm hella addicted. "Normal" social media like Facebook or Twitter has never been that tempting to me because I'm a private person and I've never found the opinions people share on them to be very interesting or compelling.
But TH-cam on the other hand, I've been steadily more and more addicted to that since 2014. Something about the intense rabbit-hole nature of the app and the fact that I can have it on in the background / feel the need for background noise now makes it like crack. I've been practicing being more comfortable with silence / my own thoughts and I'm seeing some improvement. It's just gonna take time and commitment.
I didn’t get a phone until 16 and use it for everything. Mainly TH-cam or music in the background. Computer is for college and work. Xbox for games, I try to keep everything separate so I don’t try playing a quick game, and suddenly I wasted an hour lol
We need more people talking about this. I try to keep my phone in my pocket or bag as much as possible when I’m spending time with people. I’m not perfect but I do get frustrated when my friends or family are constantly on their phones, or taking pictures/video of everything instead of enjoying the moment, its as if they cant enjoy it unless they’re on their phones, which has pushed me to do the opposite to be more present but also lead by example.
Exactly! I also get frustrated when the internet makes any conflict a petty dispute (or dogpiling session) instead of one that's productive and capable of teaching others something important. It prevents us from even knowing how to have these conversations without getting defensive or offensive.
calling the phrase "chronically online" ableist is chronically online
why?
@@zitron6416 because no one cares irl
@@shay230 ok i have cronal ilnes but i dont think it is offensiv. do you think it?
@@zitron6416 i don't care, that's my point.
@@shay230 oh ok
The internet is so hard to get off, so much information and things to do, and see. It keeps you stuck wanting more. I have figured out how get off it a bit (turning phone to grayscale) but eventually I turn it off and go back on.
I also used to think like how am i supposed to get off my phone when there is so much stuff to do, and then i realised that it is physically impossible for one person to consume all of the information even if I'll spend 24/7 so i stopped to care so much and basically obsess about it
i feel like i’m the only one that never uses their phone using/in the bathroom not only is it unsanitary but because i don’t need to. my average screen time isn’t the best but i’m working on looking at my phone a lot less and it helps i don’t have or use apps like twitter, ig, or fb and i don’t go on tiktok anymore.
The fact that im reading this in the bathroom 💀
I’m the exact opposite and I really need to stop cause it is unsanitary
Yhhh I never do that cuz I feel disgusted of taking my phone to the toilet and going out without cleaning my phone
Same, started doing that a few months ago too
Yeah I’m the same, I’m also not in their long enough to worry about my Phone lol
I went to rehab for 1 month, and we had to turn in our phones upon check in. Each day we were allowed to have our phones for 2 hours in the evenings if our therapists wrote is a “phone pass”. I was so addicted to my phone that the thought of only have 2 hours to my device made me almost nauseous. For the first five days of my check in, I had no “phone pass” so I wasn’t allowed to use it in the evenings. By the third day, I was exhibiting what seemed pretty much exactly like withdrawals. I snapped at one of the staff members for not giving me my phone and completely made an ass of myself. It was bad, and my addiction to technology wasn’t even the reason I was in rehab.
Eventually I did get a phone pass, but as the days went on, I used my phone less and less during the evenings. I called my family when I could, but there were landlines that we could use to do that, so instead I started to call my family during the day. Near the third week of my time in rehab, there were days I didn’t even use my phone. I still checked it out, but I stopped using it. I would sit around and talk to the other patients and residents, but we barely used our phones. It’s amazing how much better my mind felt during that time.
Unfortunately, it didn’t take long after checking out of rehab for my dependency on technology and my phone to come back, but your description of this issue is so spot on. This is such a good video and I hope it reaches many many more people
TW (I guess) : venting about my life
As a Maladaptive daydreamer being addicted to your phone is No joke. I spend every day at least 8 hours on youtube watching videos/scrolling shorts but not actually paying attention to any of them.
I'm escaping from a lot of internal struggles right now and mindlessly scrolling is the only thing that makes me remotely feel better because I don't have to listen to any of my thoughts when I'm alone.
I do want to try out a bunch of new hobbies ( like drawing, writing) but when I realize I have to get off my phone and leave the fantasy world that I have in my head..... suddenly all the energy i have disappears and I just back to my phone. It's a never ending cycle.
This is clearly taking a toll on my mental health I'm becoming even more anti-social than I was before, going somewhere alone is also kinda of terrifying.
I'm already gonna turn 17 y/o I don't have a job nor a dream and I wished I could have the money and courage to tell my parents what I'm going through and get a therapist but oh well I'll just wait until I turn 18 🤡
as a fellow maladaptive daydreamer i understand how stressful it can be to try to change something in your life. one of my main triggers to daydreaming were tiktoks, and i got control over it when i went to a village where there was barely any wifi for 3 weeks. i decided to delete tiktok and now i dont daydream as much. its still an addiction and i still have urges to download tiktok again and just daydream for hours again.
i think a great way is to find a substitute to daydreaming which could be more productive and socially adaptable (but still be an escapistic coping mechanism). i know how hard it can be and how much willpower you should have. i tried to get my madd under control a numerous amount of times. its a thorny path with a lot of downs but its still important to try to change your life.
its also important to ask for help if ur struggling and its a cause for madd. so PLEASE tell your parents. i know how scary it can be, but please try to do it. you deserve to get help.
you're a very strong person and i believe in you. 😊
this is so true for me as well, I am waiting to turn 18 too so that I can hopefully get therapy
almost a full day on their phone?? wow and i thought i was bad lol
I work in memory care and I’m scared to think about how this affects us in the end. If it’s tough for them now with the limited screen time they got, then idk what’s in store for us
how does the screen time affect the patients in memory care? I find that the more I use social media/my phone, the less able I am to talk well. it makes me scared for my future
I fell into a TH-cam rabbit hole about Alzheimer's once (ironic I know) and I had the exact same thought. It's scary.
It also affects your emotions. The shocking amount of people who openly talk about sewerslide, depression, hating yourself. that affects you. you start to adapt and welcome emotions and feelings like that, those are unhealthy and people use the internet as their therapist.
It makes you familiar to the emotions and not recognize them as bad, being surrounding with bad influences also makes you like them. You adapt to it and you welcome the emotions. It skews your mental health when you see all the bad in the world and have people saying “I want to #### myself, Ky$, I hate myself and everybody else”. Do you think that’s healthy? To you and to them? To be exposed to those and let them take over your mind?
Thank you so much for creating this video.
I’ve always been aware of my internet problem but never really addressed this. This video came as such a shock because I had just spend the entire day in bed on my phone and by the time I got to this video it was midnight, so yesterday I tried taking 24 hours without any devices and I actually did it! It surprised me so much but that was one of most refreshing days I’ve had in awhile.
I’ve been trying to recover from my school burnout during my summer break with the internet but I think a break from it will help more.
I’m going to try taking more and more days without media and see where it gets me!
Thank you so much!
was just thinking about this. dropped my phone in water the other day, it was so scary bc this thing is my LIFE. excited to watch the vid :)
and it shouldnt be
That's sad and very unhealthy because it shouldn't be like that but I hope things get better for you.
I am a sxual abse survivor, and I use social media to numb out when the pain becomes overwhelming. There was a time when the internet was my only tether to the outside world. I was absed for years, and now I can't stop using my phone. I get stuck until my hands hurt, getting no enjoyment out of it but unable to calm down. It destroyed my mind
Please feel these virtual hugs.
I'm sending you my love ❤️
It ultimately sucks when just about everything we do needs an internet connection, especially if you want a break from it. I'm currently online schooled and doing schoolwork online is awful. I now have way too much free time than I did when I was in public school and considering I can stay on my phone aimlessly scrolling or on my computer not doing any homework all day because "I can just do it later". I spend all of my time online too so it's not the greatest for my mental health.
The whole upset with the word “chronically” is exactly the sort of thing that a normal and mentally healthy person would never give a shit about. In what world would the term “chronically online” affect someone with a chronic illness??!
honestly they really nailed it with that intro. that whole pressure of "something's happening without you check your phone check your phone check your phone now" is why i decided id never make a full, proper twitter account. i had a couple briefly for a joke some friends and i were doing semi-long term, and even *that* was too much stress for me and i knew i wouldnt be able to handle anything more than that
i also find all the discussions of too much internet use making a brain become more passive due to all the information its presented with and a reduced ability to retain information due to not fully engaging with it in the first place to be... startlingly accurate. id noticed id been having difficulty even just remembering which videos ive watched, or even what was said earlier in a long form video i was watching, but i always just chalked it up to my adhd. now im wondering if its being compounded by this as well. i dont think its a coincidence so many platforms have implemented super short videos that automatically play one after the other after so many other apps in the past have used set ups like that and become wildly successful. theyre doing it because it clearly works
it all makes me want to try to engage with the media and videos i consume more thoroughly and critically and actually think about, understand, and remember whats being discussed, instead of just letting it slide right across my smooth ass brain.
its also made me wonder about the difference between critically engaging with media and online content versus the optics of *appearing* to critically engage with media and online content without actually bringing anything new to the discussion or being properly invested in it, and if the phenomenon of being extremely online has anythign to do with the latter
one things for sure is this video has definitely made me reflect more on my habits and my relationship with technology, even if it did make me a bit uncomfortable with how close to home some of it hit, so im very glad i did take the time to watch it
coming back to this, and about the idea of critically engaging with content versus the optics of *appearing* to critically engage in content and how extreme onlineness may factor into it
thinking back on this, i think the whole idea of our brains becoming more passive due to the massive influx of information we're faced with daily could be a big contributing factor to this. what with information being more difficult to recall due to lack of engagement, and especially in terms of social media and likes and the urge to check notifications and be well-liked/well-recieved, i think it all makes it a lot easier to simply regurgitate information in small, bite sized chunks to make it *look* like one is knowledgeable on certain subjects, regardless of whether or not they actually are, just because they heard it said somewhere else even if they dont fully get what it means or have fully thought about the implications of it. it could also contribute a lot to the hot take and echo chamber phenomena, especially on twitter. the short posts and the ease of liking and retweeting make it very easy to just repeat the same things over and over again and be rewarded for it, and especially the culture there makes it difficult to have actually informative conversations and not arguments. its a lot easier to make snappy quips and comebacks and take downs than it is to have a thorough, constructive conversation because of how the posts have to be broken up. im not so sure about how it might manifest on other platforms, since twitters really the only one ive had any personal experience with, but ive been thinking about this on and off all day and wanted to add a few more thoughts
I never used to be addicted to my phone, but as my depression/anxiety got worse I started using it to escape a little bit. I’m fully aware that I shouldn’t watch as much TV as I do or scroll through as much Twitter as I do, but I honestly can’t stop at this point. Not because I think I’m missing out or anything but because it numbs me for a bit. But I do want to drastically reduce the amount of time I spend in my phone and be more present. I need to because I think it’s making my mental health and eyesight worse :(
same =(
this is my first video i've seen of yours (kurtis conner sent me, yeeyee) but already I love it. 5:20 the point about "internet slang" being AAVE is so true, I have always felt like people don't acknowledge this at all
This was a beautifully researched, written, performed, and edited piece of work that is so meaningful to the people of the internet. Please keep making content like this!!!
I’m 18 now and haven’t had social media for almost 2 years. One of the many things I’ve realised is that solely blaming social media for your phone addiction is pointless when trying to recover. I’m still very addicted to my phone, the comfort it brings and the supply of constant filler in between me and the real world whether that be through music, video, or literally just being in my hand, serving as a barrier to let others know: I’m not here to interact. The applications you add to the phone makes the addiction more widespread, but the problem is ultimately you, your dependency on the physical phone. Addiction becomes comfort, the phone is a distraction. Take that distraction away, and all those difficult and unresolved thoughts and feeling come right back as if they just appeared today. When you try to work on it, you do feel like sh*t, but that doesn’t mean pat yourself on the back and watch some more content, it means the pathways you’ve built in your brain for the addiction are being challenged. It’s hard but it’s worth it, phone addiction is a real and troubling thing and you’ve got to take yourself seriously when it comes to changing your habits
Yessss exactly!! So many people are blaming social media and growing up with phones and I'm like the fault of your addictions and what you're feeling and are experiencing is because of you. Removing ourselves from media and our phones is NOT hard.
@@0fficialselena__90 it can’t be ignored that being raised with a phone in your hand will easily lead to addiction, and that exact factor is why I say it’s important to take yourself seriously and apply a little empathy. I was raised with it in my hand, told to have it on me at all times, and if I missed a call I got in trouble. So it’s easy to see how the dependency forms. It can’t be helped in that regard, although recovery is entirely up to you and the lack of effort is your fault
@@shmin7307 Having it at all time is so that people know where you are and incase of emergency calls but THAT within itself doesn't lead to addictions you control what you consume so your addiction is on you not the device, we can control how much time we want to spend on devices so there's no excuse really.
I know this response is a bit late, but I totally agree. In the past I've deleted my social media in hopes that I'll get off of my phone, but it always ends up with my screen time hours simply being channeled into a different, non-deleted app. No matter how many screen time limits I enable or how many apps I delete, I won't get better unless I put in my own personal effort. It's damn hard but I do think that it's worth it.
I honestly wouldn't say it's just YOU, who is the problem
lately i've been wishing i was born in a time without smartphones or laptops. the entire 2018 i was in longterm residential treatment for my mental illness and we were not allowed phones or laptops at all. and i was honestly fine like i barely even cared compared to the other rights that were taken away. this is probably because everyone i knew didn't have a phone and so we spent our free time talking, playing games, making bracelets, reading etc. we didn't even have the option to just isolate and scroll for fulfillment/entertainment, so i didn't feel like i was missing out on anything. but now i'm addicted to my phone + computer screen worse than ever...i fear that as long as it's an option for me i will do it bc it's easy😭 fml
The content, the sources, the facts, the editing, the respectful snap backs, the humor *chefs kiss* I’m so glad I found ur channel!!
Seriously thanks so much for making this not enough people are acknowledging this (especially us younger people)
I can't help but think this has become a worse problem because of the pandemic. People seem to spend more internet time in fewer places, so there's this focused half-attention. It's very easy to get caught up in something and stay there, because we avoid going elsewhere.
Yes 100%. Social interaction became something that could literally kill us, so people became reliant on their phones for any and all community. Now, people have forgotten how to exist in the real world.
Yea my social anxiety got 100x times worse doing the pandemic and it's gotten so bad i am almost afraid to leave my house lol
@@girlsgokawaii Same... I really want to fix it but it's so hard.
this is gonna be a good one. i cant lie, i am ashamed of my screen time and have some ego centric thoughts about being upset when my friends don’t reply to me about things i text, but i talk quite a lot and like to socialize. if other people don’t go on their phones for every notification they see, i can’t force or expect them to and start to learn to be okay with that for myself as well
this is a big thing for me too.
This really hit deep for me, thank you. All of the commentary of the thoughts are things I’ve experienced and thought. I’ve seen things like this but nothing as good as this. It’s hard to explain but this helped
You know your video accomplished the goal when this is decidedly the only video I need to see today 🤘🏻👏🏼🔥💛✨ thanks for continuing to upload!