Thrilling Adventures of Florida Man III - Spaghetti Sauce With a Vengeance

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 1.2K

  • @brainblaze6526
    @brainblaze6526  3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    Get 20% OFF + Free Shipping + 2 FREE GIFTS @Manscaped with code BLAZE at Manscaped.com! mnscpd.com/blaze #sponsored

    • @jimmiedmc1
      @jimmiedmc1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Should do a give away for at least 2 of them? With there permission ofcourse even if it's just in the UK

    • @lollerich
      @lollerich 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Careful if you order from the EU. It took 4 months to arrive and I had to pay 39€ in duty and taxes

    • @danielladwein2570
      @danielladwein2570 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      TIME TRAVELLER!!!

    • @benbutler9354
      @benbutler9354 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I’ve been watching you for a long time now Simon and I’ve also been looking at the Lawn Mower 3.0 for a while too! So happy I can get a product I’m interested in and support you at the same time. Can confirm, I just purchased the Peak Performance package using the code BLAZE 😏

    • @kommandantgalileo
      @kommandantgalileo 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      COCAINE!!!!

  • @NathanCassidy721
    @NathanCassidy721 3 ปีที่แล้ว +651

    “Hey Danny,” Sam said one day, “What’s with that big red phone in the corner?”
    “I don’t know,” Danny squinted at the line of text in the darkness for a long time before reporting, “ It says, ‘Press 1 for Human Resources’”
    “We have an HR department...? HOW?!”
    “I don’t know but Overlord Simon made an error. We can at least call for help!”
    Danny struggled with his bound foot on the radiator for a bit before finally reaching the receiver and hitting the coveted number. In the darkness, Sam could barely make out the expression of Joy turn into the sour expression of Angry Disgust. And since there was barely any background noise Sam already knew what sound was coming out of the receiver before Danny held it up in his general direction:
    “Never gonna give you up!
    Never gonna let you down!
    Never gonna turn around and desert you...”

    • @kayypurrs2318
      @kayypurrs2318 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Yass 🤣

    • @Larsenne
      @Larsenne 3 ปีที่แล้ว +81

      I have never seen a Rick Roll in print before...that may actually be a first-time-ever achievement.

    • @mcpossum
      @mcpossum 3 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      This needs to be pinned

    • @cherisseepp5332
      @cherisseepp5332 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Fantastic!

    • @fantomp1773
      @fantomp1773 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      lmao

  • @ericdreblow8564
    @ericdreblow8564 3 ปีที่แล้ว +321

    I love how honest Simon is. With basically everything. Him openly admitting he likes money whenever he talks about merch, ads or sponsors for example, just expressing his opinions, admitting when he doesn't know something and his laziness and the creation process of his BB topics.
    It's very refreshing to get that plain honesty from a TH-camr

    • @HFFCANADA
      @HFFCANADA 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Yes I agree, like it is difficult to produce things for people no matter what you make. But I hate when they pretend that it's an actual job equivalent to like a lawyer or a bricklayer.
      Simon is very humble, it's the facades people try and put on to get attention that bugs me.
      Just be real and tell us you're kinda shit at ur job n ur doing it for money. 🤷
      I can respect that.

    • @ericdreblow8564
      @ericdreblow8564 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      @@HFFCANADA Well said. I don't always agree with him, but (as far as I can tell) he's never pretentious and I can always except and respect stuff he says, no matter if my opinion differs.
      Still my favourite creator on YT

    • @ericdreblow8564
      @ericdreblow8564 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @tenebrous soul That's pretty funny, actually

    • @mangot589
      @mangot589 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      And he says stuff about his overpriced stickers. I have a couple, and I personally think they’re very well made stickers lol

    • @Lebowski69
      @Lebowski69 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I love his plug for his other channel at the end

  • @traditionalnative
    @traditionalnative 3 ปีที่แล้ว +330

    As someone who has ADHD, the thing where "adhd" floats in front of simon's face when he gets off topic too long, i find it hilarious and relate to that on a spiritual level. I feel like I should have one irl smh 🤣

    • @troubledwaters7441
      @troubledwaters7441 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Ha ! Me too! Perfect!

    • @Guerrilla_Grodd
      @Guerrilla_Grodd 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I ended up improvising..
      All I needed was a mirror and a permanent marker 😂

    • @PushyPushyPhoenix
      @PushyPushyPhoenix 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Ha! I was ambivalent, cause on one hand the prevalence of using it the same way people say "I'm a little OCD" has negatively affected its seriousness, and that bugs me. But on the other hand, I want a sign like that to pop up every time I do exactly the same thing because ADHD. Quite funny. 🤷🍍

    • @traditionalnative
      @traditionalnative 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@PushyPushyPhoenix I agree completely with that and that's a good point.

    • @iammaxhailme
      @iammaxhailme 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      same, I just want a big ADHD logo on my shirt

  • @serafinabreu
    @serafinabreu 3 ปีที่แล้ว +242

    I started watching this video during lunch on my buds when suddenly they died. The audio started playing automatically through my phone as my boss whas passing by and all he heard was Simon saying "you d!ck head". He turned around and said "nice.. a new business blaze video." Lol who knew the man had a sence of humor.

    • @himmelblau2126
      @himmelblau2126 3 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      And now I know your TH-cam handle, Peter!

    • @tanakaba
      @tanakaba 3 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      Whew, when I read the first sentence I thought you were watching *with* your buds, and they suddenly died. Although going out with a new Blaze video is how I want to go.

    • @Amethyst_Dragon_
      @Amethyst_Dragon_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      You my friend are a Legend

    • @serafinabreu
      @serafinabreu 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@himmelblau2126 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @vfreeman3188
      @vfreeman3188 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Perfect

  • @cherraberra7346
    @cherraberra7346 3 ปีที่แล้ว +217

    Simon: Would rather go to prison then write something.
    Danny: In basement prison and forced to write scripts.

  • @morganb6717
    @morganb6717 3 ปีที่แล้ว +81

    Danny's script: 'i'm not one to judge, but i suspect *_four of the three people_* involved in this story...'
    Simon's brain: unfazed

    • @cdseeber11
      @cdseeber11 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      🤣🤣🤣

  • @StevenLockey
    @StevenLockey 3 ปีที่แล้ว +91

    Danny needs to write a primary introduction on the first page, a secondary introduction on the 2nd page and so on to really confuse Simon!

    • @SREDISKRAD
      @SREDISKRAD 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      YES! And the two introductions have to have barely anything in common except at the end where he ties them together (on page 3)

    • @Tubajock2
      @Tubajock2 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Nah just a 20 page blaze of consecutive interdictions interdicting the next one, with the last introducing the 1st

    • @jimmiedmc1
      @jimmiedmc1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      I hope danny gets the idea to write out an entire episode as one big introduction,

    • @Deerhunterjs
      @Deerhunterjs 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Or take all the introductions for business blaze and make a script with them.

  • @mortal3256
    @mortal3256 3 ปีที่แล้ว +595

    If you’re a true business blaze fan, you come for all of the video. Including the intro.

    • @thomashenderson5742
      @thomashenderson5742 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      And the ad read

    • @Kwastaken
      @Kwastaken 3 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      Nay. If you are a TRUE BB fan, you come for the intro only. I am so much of a BB fan that for every single episode I press play, watch the intro, fast forward to the ad read, intently hang on every word Simon reads in regard to the sponsor, then I immediately turn off the video and buy whatever Fact boi is peddling just to support the channel.

    • @bcf601
      @bcf601 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Only ads I truly watch

    • @jessicaevans7847
      @jessicaevans7847 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Mostly because that's part of the wonky ass charm here.

    • @jessicaevans7847
      @jessicaevans7847 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@Kwastaken then by definition you're not an OGBB, since to be one you need to watch to the end for your legendary status, and pick up all the in jokes including from in the ad reads. Don't be a poser.

  • @GeorgiaOverdrive
    @GeorgiaOverdrive 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Simon in the last video: "Well, the Florida Man video didn’t do as well as I thought it would"
    Simon: "DANNY WRITE MORE OF THOSE!"

  • @samueltopps9015
    @samueltopps9015 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    Business Blaze and The Casual Criminalist are slowly becoming one. By the way the longer the intro the better. You could probably do a whole video of Danny's life story rants.

    • @Amccordford
      @Amccordford 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      This would probably satisfy most people's desires for a biographics of Danny's life. I would love a BB that is all one lone intro all about Danny. :P

  • @graylinshowell7051
    @graylinshowell7051 3 ปีที่แล้ว +73

    I don't understand why this channel only has a quarter million subscribers. Spiff needs to team up with Simon to boost his audience. This is one of the best channels in English speaking media.

    • @jimmiedmc1
      @jimmiedmc1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      He explained in another video in one of his ADHD rants, 70 percent of his viewers aren't subscribed and it honestly doesnt matter, he makes the same regardless if viewers are subscribed or not, all that matters is that you watch a minimum of 98% of the video regardless if you hit like or dislike, subscribed or not the algorithm will suggest his videos in your feed,

    • @graylinshowell7051
      @graylinshowell7051 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@jimmiedmc1 Well, he explained those metrics are essentially reversed for BB. Around 85% of his viewers are subscribed on this channel, which is very high. I think that as long as this channel is profitable he isn't incredibly concerned about acquiring more traffic. I just think it would be hilarious if Simon were to film and release about 100 47 second long shorts over a month. I'd want to see something like an inside joke or reference. The content matters little since shorts have a different algorithm rating engagement. I don't see it happening mostly because I doubt Simon wants to put in the work. It's like installing a turbo kit on a RAV4, if done correctly, it almost doesn't matter that you did it at all.

    • @boriskortiak320
      @boriskortiak320 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I thought he said BB was backwards to the rest with very high percentage of viewers subscribed.

    • @jimmiedmc1
      @jimmiedmc1 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@graylinshowell7051 I never see ads on shorts so not sure what would be in it for him, also the number of channels he has hes making money, and the rates of his sponsorships must make it so revenue is all extra I would think

    • @neen42
      @neen42 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      He has a ridiculous amount of channels: every other week he starts a new one, lol

  • @riptidemonzarc3103
    @riptidemonzarc3103 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    "Unarmed burglary... wouldn't that just be burglary?"
    Oh Simon, you're talking about Florida. They've got to specify unarmed jaywalking (allegedly)

  • @kimhohlmayer7018
    @kimhohlmayer7018 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Loved the giant ADHD rolling over Simon as he waffled a bit. As a fellow ADHD I salute you!

  • @deonchua7642
    @deonchua7642 3 ปีที่แล้ว +73

    2 Florida man videos in a row?! What a treat!

    • @joshuahosang6690
      @joshuahosang6690 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Word

    • @eveyoung3656
      @eveyoung3656 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      No, it just shows that Simon is creatively corrupt.

  • @jcIndy81
    @jcIndy81 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I lost it watching how excited he got about the resealable box. The ads really are one of the best.

  • @qienna6677
    @qienna6677 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Business Blaze ad reads: Simon looks at everything for the first time in the box and tries to remember we're all still here watching him advertise the stuff

  • @GideonFrazier
    @GideonFrazier 3 ปีที่แล้ว +60

    I hope Brian the meme accountant is okay. If you’re reading this we think about you often and miss you. Hope you’re doing okay.

  • @barrywerdell2614
    @barrywerdell2614 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Simon @12:47 you were talking about a man who was too large to be imprisoned reminded me of a story about an outlaw in the old west called Black Jack who was convicted of murder and sentenced to be hung. They weighed Black Jack right after the trial so they could calculate the ratio for the hanging (yes there is such a thing). Unfortunately that it took such a long time before they hung him and he gained so much weight that the ratio for hanging him was wrong and when he was hung his head popped right off and flew into the air.

  • @redram5150
    @redram5150 3 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    “Judges are impartial”
    I remember when I believed that too

    • @cdseeber11
      @cdseeber11 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I was thinking the same thing. Poor sweet naive Simon...

  • @Kaiserland111
    @Kaiserland111 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    YES! The He-Man laughing meme is my absolute favorite. Thanks Sam for the fantastic memes!

  • @phillyfanist
    @phillyfanist 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    I swear, Simon is the only person who can segway from talking about "rapey prison" into an ad read about male genitalia trimmers

  • @gunsmithkevin
    @gunsmithkevin 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I never miss a Florida man video, makes me thankful I live in Nevada!

  • @jamesdreads7828
    @jamesdreads7828 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    ive been watching Simon's videos for years now, and ive never once seen him as excited as he was when he read Danny's comment about fast and furious. i hope ill be that happy one day

  • @johnmcf
    @johnmcf 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Business Blazes newest motto: “I promise today’s sponsorship product hasn’t touched my genitals” ALLEGEDLY

  • @AverytheCubanAmerican
    @AverytheCubanAmerican 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    How dare you cut off the beautiful singing of He-Man
    now we'll never know what's going on...

    • @Zepplin76
      @Zepplin76 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      th-cam.com/video/ZZ5LpwO-An4/w-d-xo.html

  • @KamiNoBaka1
    @KamiNoBaka1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Simon, they clearly make the box that way in case your stuff gets there broken or something and you need to return it. Which actually makes it pretty awesome, good box design there. Seal it back up and slap a shipping label on it. Done.

  • @Ferdoss
    @Ferdoss 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    When Simon goes off on a tangent it always reminds me of grandpa Simpson telling a story 😁

  • @michaeltopasna1777
    @michaeltopasna1777 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I legitimately want to see a business blaze where Sam and Danny switch roles

  • @aprilmoyer193
    @aprilmoyer193 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Sometimes (for example in this episode), the ad read is just as funny, if not funnier than the actual content itself! You sure know how to sell product Simon!

  • @SREDISKRAD
    @SREDISKRAD 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Business blaze is successful because you get into the content we enjoy immediately, the BLAZE!
    Also, whens the sequel to "10 inventions no-one needed (epic blaze)"? That one got your most views ever and you still do not honour your words of if it does well you do another because you're, erm, a business man, doing business.

    • @jacobswafford1151
      @jacobswafford1151 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Saving it for RAID SHADOW LEGENDS ads

    • @SREDISKRAD
      @SREDISKRAD 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      ​@@jacobswafford1151 Paladium needs to make a new cashcow first

  • @Texassince1836
    @Texassince1836 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Hey Simon I just saw a Kinder Suprise at Walmart in Texas, but some bell end put the toy outside the egg and wrote Kinder Joy on the package. Im just being a cheeky bastard, I know the difference 😂

    • @paritybit7830
      @paritybit7830 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      In Texas, you might actually be able to find one. Now that Kinder Joys are everywhere, maybe not so much, but in the past there have been little shops near the borders that carried them. (Or was that only a Canadian border thing? Hmm.) They may be harder to smuggle now though as the story of their illegality has grown.... or easier since nobody can tell the difference between Joys and Surprises? It used to be easy though (in small quantities) since nobody would think twice about you bringing a handful of chocolates across the border.
      Don't think you'll find one at wal-mart though, no matter how close to the border, and if you do, someone's getting fired.

    • @Terri_MacKay
      @Terri_MacKay 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@paritybit7830 I live in Canada, and would buy a Kinder Surprise as a treat for myself once in a while. THEN...I bought a Kinder Joy, and there was no going back!! The candy in the Joy is soooo much better than the Surprise chocolate egg. So, any Americans who think you're missing out by not being able to get the Surprises, you're not missing anything.

  • @simplyramona8678
    @simplyramona8678 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Literally the funniest Simon EVER!!!
    Declares "I don't have ear hair", then clips his ear hair!😄😝😄

  • @dennislp3
    @dennislp3 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    "Danny, where do you eat?"
    Your basement, Simon...your fucking basement...he is trying to express his dissatisfaction via comedy...

  • @domomitsune5920
    @domomitsune5920 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The hamster ball idea sounds like a good one, as long as you came the proper supplies. That would be one hell of a world record to cross the Atlantic Ocean in a inflatable hamster ball. It would be like the first flight across the Atlantic successfully. Personally I would love to try to cross from California to Hawaii in an inflatable hamster ball myself. Imagine all the cost-saving measures you would have taken, while setting a record in the process.

  • @kc8203
    @kc8203 3 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    No adult human being should be calling spaghetti, "sketty".

    • @Im-Not-a-Dog
      @Im-Not-a-Dog 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      At least he didnt say "Pasketti".

  • @BaldingClamydia
    @BaldingClamydia 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I love when Simon and Danny fight through time. :D Maybe if you didn't keep him in the basement, the intros would get shorter.

  • @TechnoLawyer
    @TechnoLawyer 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Simon, most court proceedings (in the US anyway) are open to the public, so there is zero security concern about zoom most of the time. In fact, many judges set up a livestream for their zoom hearings to make it easy for the public to view.

  • @brianmccarthy3720
    @brianmccarthy3720 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This has become my favorite video so far because,
    A. I’m a man from Florida.
    B. I love the Danny and Sam videos.
    C. I need a discount on Manscaped.

  • @OtakuUnitedStudio
    @OtakuUnitedStudio 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    17:44 We've finally done it, lads and lady-lads. An honest to goodness Jojo reference.

  • @lindseylocker
    @lindseylocker 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I've started watching from the first episode of Business Blaze after getting hooked on the channel in the last week or so (while still watching new releases as they drop); it's now one of my favorite channels of any genre on YT!

  • @nolanryan1234
    @nolanryan1234 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I’ve lived in DeLand, FL for 21 years and this doesn’t surprise me in the slightest. My high school’s senior prank in 2004 was unleashing hundreds of thousands of bees into the school from stolen hives. Though we DO have a pretty good brewery.

    • @Xypetotec
      @Xypetotec 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      born there (not sure if I should be admitting this..) and I'm trying to remember if I heard anything about it.. we've had some odd headlines but this isn't ringing any bells.

    • @LegendaryM7
      @LegendaryM7 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Don't know anything about the brewery, but there's a reason why DeLand is known as the skydiving capital of the world. There's just not much else this city can be known for, other than maybe the local university that just about every honors teacher wouldn't shut up about back when I was in school. That's why DeLand only gets recognized for the Florida man/woman stories, the pranks, and the less common tragic stuff.

  • @Apocfetau
    @Apocfetau 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I think part of the reason the long intros work for Business Blaze is the fact that mostly everyone else on TH-cam adheres to the policy of short intros into content, the breaking of the standard routine is quite refreshing and enjoyable and for the newbies it is unexpected and quirky; a "Business Blaze Flavour" as you will.
    Personally I would love a joke vid where 85% is just the introduction, I think Danny could use the challenge since being chained up in the basement all the time must be quite dull.

  • @jamesleatherwood5125
    @jamesleatherwood5125 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Florida Man, Darwin Awards, Dumb Criminals, and other peoples massive mistakes/Dumb Antics will always bring great views, and, as long as there is a modicum of effort put into the presentation and layout, any youtuber dabbling in these categories is likely to find a moderate level of sucess.

  • @09epyon
    @09epyon 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I have the feeling simon made all of these channels so that he can self plug on all of then with a different channel daily. Outstanding move.

  • @greenybird7132
    @greenybird7132 3 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    I can’t wait for The Fast & The Furious 73. The characters are now all living in a nursing home and race their electric wheelchairs. It’s gonna be siiiiiccccck bro!

    • @Colt45hatchback
      @Colt45hatchback 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Problem is, it wont be that, theyll set up to do a race, then spacex or nasa will call em up to take on an intergalactic crime ring and theyll have space ships that look like chargers and supras n stuff, with lasers, railguns and whatever. And theyll fuck around and save the universe. As apposed to having a damn drag race down the hallway, like what we all actually wanted to see.

    • @greenybird7132
      @greenybird7132 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@Colt45hatchback lasers are pretty tight. They will definitely have laser.

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I'm already excited

  • @cindygr8ce
    @cindygr8ce ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I lived in Germany as a child and am beyond pissed I can't give my children the joy that is a kinder surprise. To this day it's my favorite choc since I can buy kinder bars by themselves.

  • @twocvbloke
    @twocvbloke 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Yeah, I remember the "It's corked" thing with Clarkson, it was to do with Jag owners often being con artists and thieves, I mean they have to be given how often the things break down, gotta find the money from somewhere to be able to drive their Jaaaaaaaaaaaaaag... :P

  • @vbun4662
    @vbun4662 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The longer the intros are here the better. Danny is a master. One day I hope to get a video that's entirely the intro and then the end is a quick listing of whatever the actual topic is supposed to be.

  • @zzippo81
    @zzippo81 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Sometimes I go back and watch old videos just to remember the times of yesteryear where SIMON'S NEON SIGN ACTUALLY WORKED.

    • @antonioarroyas7662
      @antonioarroyas7662 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      All the electricity for it goes up Danny's nose.

    • @jaymzx0
      @jaymzx0 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@antonioarroyas7662 Turns out one of those Manscaped boxes is for Danny. Gotta keep the jungle cleared so the electrodes will work.

  • @Nesseight
    @Nesseight 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    That awkward moment when King Hippo comes to your restaurant, eats all the food, then tries to walk out without paying up.

  • @ignitionfrn2223
    @ignitionfrn2223 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    4:50 - Chapter 1 - Florida man faces 2 weeks...after eating evidence in court
    9:15 - Chapter 2 - Florida man too fat...for jail
    12:50 - Mid roll ads
    16:20 - Chapter 3 - Florida man (disguised as a bull) tries to burn ex-boyfriend house...with spaghetti sauce
    19:55 - Chapter 4 - Florida threatens to kill someone with kindness...who is actually the name of a machete
    21:50 - Chapter 5 - Florida man rescued twice...while travelling in a inflatable hamster ball.

  • @kimhohlmayer7018
    @kimhohlmayer7018 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Danny, this intro was your best! I laughed loudly at the George Lazenby!
    We got illegal real Kinder Eggs with the toy inside the container inside the chocolate egg from a little store in a US state. It was a great Middle Eastern shop with not just real Kinder Eggs but soooooo many other legal goodies.
    And only little kids call it sketti

  • @FreyasArts
    @FreyasArts 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I love how Simon was almost more exited about the box itself rather than the products in it 😂

    • @andiward7068
      @andiward7068 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Must be his inner cat shining through. Allegedly.

  • @EyesOfByes
    @EyesOfByes 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You've seen Back To The Future, but neither Star Wars or LOTR? That's kind of an achievement in my book. Well played Simon, well played

  • @1xoACEox1
    @1xoACEox1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    Are there any Florida Woman stories? Or are they all at home wishing they'd listened to their mother about not marrying Florida Man?

    • @andiward7068
      @andiward7068 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      They exist but they are fewer in number and are messier.

    • @antonioarroyas7662
      @antonioarroyas7662 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      They are the equivalent of South Carolina man and thus don't get as much attention. That being said, do not approche one in the wild or look them in the eyes.

    • @golddragonette7795
      @golddragonette7795 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      He's got videos of Florida Women on Top Tenz

    • @garyhall7867
      @garyhall7867 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Eileen Wurnos

    • @funnypenelope
      @funnypenelope 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@garyhall7867 *Aileen

  • @just_neon7978
    @just_neon7978 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I live in Florida, and I love these videos lol. My state is insane, but we're not boring

  • @Pravculear
    @Pravculear 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Business Blaze- where simon whistler's professionalism goes to die.

    • @Mamorufumio
      @Mamorufumio 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      more like the channel he lets loss

  • @meakimon
    @meakimon ปีที่แล้ว

    Been binging your videos and man, I live for the intros though! And the tangents! It's not because I have adhd and love constant rotation of topics. Well it is, but it's also because I love Simon's delivery of such amazing scripts that Danny and Kevin and I'm sure there's more writers on this channel, they do great work! And not to forget Sam! Sam. You keep me glued to the screen with your editing. I'm trying to get work done while watching these... I just- it's a struggle. Keep it up!

  • @ScarletCandlelight
    @ScarletCandlelight 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    SW: "Not glorifying the use of drugs"
    Also SW: *"COCAINE!!"*

  • @nicolassalamanca8051
    @nicolassalamanca8051 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I didn't watch yesterday on my one day off a week cause I knew I would need it today to cheer me up
    Especially FLORIDA MAN😍

  • @SupremeLeaderKimJong-un
    @SupremeLeaderKimJong-un 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I'm all for taking Florida and pushing it somewhere else
    Who's with me?

    • @GeorgeVCohea-dw7ou
      @GeorgeVCohea-dw7ou 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      th-cam.com/video/FfHXJpVsHJ4/w-d-xo.html
      If we could swap Florida out with South Korea, I would say yes! Ram the Carolinas against the west coast of North Korea and you get the loser's trifecta.

    • @johnny.thetshirtguy3545
      @johnny.thetshirtguy3545 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well push it south, not east👍

  • @AtillatheFun
    @AtillatheFun 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I want to move to the U.S from Canada and start a black market Kinder Surprise business. Seems like I might corner the market. Thanks for the business idea Simon.

  • @DBurpees1
    @DBurpees1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I need this video right now. I need a break from watching this trial go down.

    • @TJDious
      @TJDious 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Then turn it off, genius.

    • @oracleofdelphi4533
      @oracleofdelphi4533 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Murder is hilarious enough already.

  • @amandajones661
    @amandajones661 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I know what I'm getting my son and son in law for Christmas. It's so nice to find something nice for grown men.

  • @brianjrichman
    @brianjrichman 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Meme Accountant Here... it's "Cop-o-la", not "Cop-Ohhh-la". Is someone doing something to you that you like like when you said that?

    • @andiward7068
      @andiward7068 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Meme Count! Glad to have you, you BBOG.

    • @keithgarner2759
      @keithgarner2759 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You're back!

    • @Elysia_Fields
      @Elysia_Fields 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ultimate OGBB!!! Hope you're well!

  • @sazae
    @sazae 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Well the town I live in here in Florida made it into the last Florida Man video and we did it again. When Florida Man IV happens, and we know it will, I hope that maybe I'll know the person this time.

  • @munky871
    @munky871 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Sometimes it seems like Simon is as much a prisoner as Danny...just Simon's cell has a window and lighting

    • @richardaubrecht2822
      @richardaubrecht2822 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Cellar windows, which are peed on by weirdly muscular dogs.

    • @davesmith6059
      @davesmith6059 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      When he's not recording, you can find Simon in that very room. Milling around eating sandwiches, napping, or muttering to himself about kinder eggs.

    • @thedarkdragon1437
      @thedarkdragon1437 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes. He is. Why do you think he is cloned so much?

    • @thedarkdragon1437
      @thedarkdragon1437 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @asdrubale bisanzio you may have missed a joke...or hundred :D but yes plz I agreeze

  • @thomashawker3504
    @thomashawker3504 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I love top gear! The show deserves its own episode!

  • @seansopata5121
    @seansopata5121 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    "This is america. No chocolate and a toy for you. It's dangerous. Instead, here, have a gun"

    • @bluerosegurl
      @bluerosegurl 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Not how that works. But I mean, if you want to add to the plastic waste of the world-feel free to add to it.

  • @Sandy.J.Lloyd.Sr.
    @Sandy.J.Lloyd.Sr. 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Blazing at the bakery with Simon, our boy with the Blaze.

  • @skyden24195
    @skyden24195 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Danny's script: "Send Florida Man into early retirement before he jumps the alligator."
    Captain America: "I understood that reference."

  • @charmaintrout174
    @charmaintrout174 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    My brain was NOT ready for the picture of the graters. Well played Sam. Well played. 👏

  • @kathimorrical9912
    @kathimorrical9912 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I've never laughed so hard before at a segue! "Is it a rapey prison?" "Manscapes"
    Beautiful!!

  • @scelenty
    @scelenty 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    this guy and Nostalgia Critic, only two channels where you don't skip the sponsored content , legend

    • @jsmith3946
      @jsmith3946 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Can't believe some people still support Nostalgia Critic considering how he let his female staff get sexual assaulted and did nothing about it also lets not forget his sexist behavior I swear the people who watch his channel are misinform and don't know what's going on or idiots who don't care

    • @scelenty
      @scelenty 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jsmith3946 ooof, thank's for letting me know, had no clue.

  • @pumibel1720
    @pumibel1720 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    ADHD. Yes, Sam, you nailed it!

    • @WhatWhy42
      @WhatWhy42 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I only made it half way through this comment

    • @pumibel1720
      @pumibel1720 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@WhatWhy42 can relate

  • @RachelAnnPotter
    @RachelAnnPotter 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Lol, that neckbeard desk was on point
    Edit: 13:17

  • @dgrimm4284
    @dgrimm4284 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    ...who gets up at 2am to make sketti? Someone doesn't hang out with millennials.

  • @eugenics_gone_wrong1939
    @eugenics_gone_wrong1939 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    And another 26min. Of my life go to the man with the blaze. What a magnificent way to end a day!

  • @DASBIGUN
    @DASBIGUN 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    I want desperately for someone, ANYONE, to call a judge "judgy".

    • @WhatWhy42
      @WhatWhy42 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Been there, done that

    • @jaymzx0
      @jaymzx0 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@WhatWhy42 So.....how did it work out for you?

  • @GaryBickford
    @GaryBickford 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Coast guard cost includes the amortized cost of the cutter (ship), the salaries of a the solid, the operating costs including fuel, etc. The cutter was likely 70 feet with a crew of 30 or so. The costs start from the moment the engines are turned on. Then there was the shore crew monitoring radar, etc. Plus there was probably a helicopter, for another $10,000 per hour.

  • @mattbass4807
    @mattbass4807 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Fact Boi LOVES telling kinder egg / surprise story

  • @ladyluna6082
    @ladyluna6082 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Sam has killed it and me with the memes this time!!! Lmao

  • @Blargaha
    @Blargaha 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    In this video: SImon gives you permission to be gay, followed by a chef's kiss.
    And also.. something about Florida

  • @eddiehardt
    @eddiehardt ปีที่แล้ว

    Man, these older videos are just better in every way. I still like the newer episodes, but these are the classics!

  • @KillerAceUSAF
    @KillerAceUSAF 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Is this Christmas? Because getting two Floridaman videos in a row feels like Christmas.

  • @DerptyDerptyDUM
    @DerptyDerptyDUM 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Simon's joy at 3:40 is infectious. 😂

  • @ervinjoe92
    @ervinjoe92 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Last time I was this early, the neon sign in the back was still working lol

    • @fuckyoutube5584
      @fuckyoutube5584 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      He should just make a video of him repairing that thing. Like shit we all be watching just see her lighten up again. She is like the star on top the tree. She needs shine bright

  • @spddiesel
    @spddiesel 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Some part threes are awesome. Last Crusade, Army of Darkness, and Christmas Vacation were all third movies in a series.

  • @khraggle
    @khraggle 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    They sent him four of everything cause they know Simon uses clones

    • @renren4m802
      @renren4m802 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      "one for each of your clones, and this broken one for your boy in the basement"

  • @matthewwoods6972
    @matthewwoods6972 ปีที่แล้ว

    I loved them growing up in America. My grandmother was a full German, but I did see them once in Seatle, Washington. It was in a German store.

  • @TheCullenscott
    @TheCullenscott 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Only two more days until I can afford to blaze to business blaze again

  • @MilluMArt
    @MilluMArt 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    1:50
    I
    NEED
    THIS
    SIGN
    (for my everyday life, just rolling across the views of people I have in my life, whenever i go off topic or otherwise gets distracted. YES! my life is very much controlled by my ADHD)

  • @sakurakitsunestar
    @sakurakitsunestar 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Petition to give Danny one of the 4 manscape boxes because he probably needs grooming supplies down there in the basement

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      How would he be able to recharge anything?

    • @temseti0
      @temseti0 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@brainblaze6526 thats the point:
      * Danny receives a manscape kit *
      Simon tosses Danny a box. "They sent us four. I guess you might want to see one," he says before closing the basement door, leaving Danny in the dank loneliness he has come to find comfortably familiar.
      Danny opens the box by pulling the tab, and discovers that he has been gifted a Manscape Box! a nose-hair trimmer, and even a shaver for his delicate areas. Danny suspects a trap, but at this point is simply hoping that this will give him some sense of humanity.
      The weeks pass. Danny has used the equipment in the box to make his privates far more presentable - not that he has anyone to present them to, it's just for his own knowledge. It makes him feel a bit more human, more civilized.
      Danny goes to activate the trimmer. Its been a bit tired of late, quickly dying after he turns it on - but Danny discovers that if he just trims a little bit at a time, he can still make himself presentable. Then the horrific happens: the trimmer doesnt turn on. at all. not even one ocilation.
      Danny eventually asks Simon for permission to recharge the trimmer. Simon ignores the pleas. Danny tries delicately injecting requests for a return of this small token of civility back in his life - The punishment was harsh.
      It is now that Danny realizes that his initial suspicions were right: this WAS a trap. He was granted a sense of civilization - of humanit - only to have it now permenantly stripped away.
      This breaks Danny's spirit all the more.

    • @christinebenson518
      @christinebenson518 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@temseti0 I'm not sure whether you're trying to give Simon ideas on torturing Danny or giving Danny story ideas.
      Either way it's hilarious!!!

  • @mazzame6480
    @mazzame6480 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    ADHA flashing on screen was pure class....🤣😜😎🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

  • @SegwayBossk
    @SegwayBossk 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Florida Man reporting in. I need to up my shitposting game so Simon will take notice
    Edit: I get real high and IIIIIIIII
    scream at the top of my lungs
    WHATS GOING ON!!!

  • @vitalspark6288
    @vitalspark6288 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Back to the Future 2 is amazing though. The best scenes aren't where he's in the future though, but when he's revisiting scenes from Back to the Future 1, and how the two storylines start to cleverly interleave.

  • @katwalker07
    @katwalker07 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    As a Florida woman, I'm just sitting here laughing my ass off about these.

  • @the_hanged_clown
    @the_hanged_clown 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    9:30 I'm told that's a great way to get out of debt too, when they call asking for money you tell them you've got to report to prison tomorrow and they'll drop the charges.

  • @danielladwein2570
    @danielladwein2570 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I would like to meet with Danny because he seems to be lonely in that basement.

    • @nellom.8771
      @nellom.8771 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sam is down there...probably more now. Including the corpse of ETA

    • @boriskortiak320
      @boriskortiak320 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Collum may have joined them as well.