To every woman listening to this awesome video today I say look hard at your guy and see if he is doing all of these behaviors. Any guy who makes excuses instead of doing every one of these signs Brian mentions is not worthy of your time, period. We women twist ourselves into pretzels and rationalize all kinds of bad behavior just bc we want *this guy* to be *the One* I was 61 and still doing this! But it hurt so much I finally took Brian's advice, looked at that bad behavior from the guy who said he loved me (yet would never talk about the future, etc) and once I got my own mind clear about what was true and stopped making excuses for this man who wasn't truly loving me, I walked away. That was THE best decision, ever! A few months later I met a man who showed every single one of these behaviors consistently as we started dating seriously. I married him and we are celebrating our 2nd anniversary soon. Don't waste your precious life on any man who isn't stepping up and moving heaven and earth to make you HIS woman. Life is too short to waste and you deserve nothing less than true love! As you get older you start seeing it really does boil down to these facts... How does he treat you??? Don't make excuses, get honest!
@milenao4455 YOU treat you that way, hold up your own worth, develop yourself, become the person you would want to be with. Doing that instead of looking incessantly for the ONE attracts the right kind of person to you. ❤️
@@milenao4455better to be alone that to be treated badly or waste your life with someone who doesn’t like or love you truly. No? Or are you desperate for D?
My ex showed all this behavior early on. Not only talking about the future, but actually meeting of our families very soon, taking on my cues etc. And then turned out to be an avoidant as the relationship deepened… very disapointing and hurtful.
Him wanting to meet your family so soon is a red flag. He should've been focusing on getting to know you first. When men try too hard, it’s often a red flag.
Hmmm A true man will be respectful of every woman. Of course there is difference with a “special one.” But how he is with all women or people is how he’s going to be with you when the “pink cloud period is over.”
I met a man like this not long ago. All in. Wanted to move closer to me. Already planning a trip to see my family next Spring (they live abroad) etc. Then the deal breaker happened. He turned into this wounded boy who was actually looking for a parent. Sorry, but that's not me. I don't want a child.
I recognize the signs now that you shared this video. Thanks for bringing this information to the forefront, so we women will be able to read our men better.
Yes, people fall in love sometimes but then they fall out of love. (and not at the same time!) Nothing lasts forever. Our life is a long journey full of dissapointments... The biggest challenge is getting old alone ... but it's a good lesson, to learn that life is not about selfish pleasures and fun but constant self development etc..
I have been married for just under two years.That loving look has disappeared, he seems to need more alone time.I think Iam starting to feel less interested also.We get along o.k.,but I notice less communication.My husband is 15yrs. Younger and I expect some of that.But I do not want to chase or beg my husband.Will he come around?
@@UrsaBellano, you can definitely fall out of love. I did, more than once. But sometimes love is forever. When my dad died, my parents were married for 56 years at that point. My mom lived 8 more years but alone. My parents were really in love, you could tell.
As a man I can only speak about myself (regarding the last part of the video and its question): a) beside of what you have seen, ...maybe I went to the bar's toilett with your female friend yesterday, 10 minutes after introducing - I will not sleep with you fast when I have interest b) I want to get to know you, per dates and activities, at least a little c) I will not share much about my personal life, instead I let the woman talk and get my idea about her values and personality in this way d) but I do ask about her social constellation (family, colleagues, friends - relationship with father, how many male friends she has, ect.) e) if you say things to me as your idea, like: "It wont be easy for you, to get rid of me" - well, I will test that out. Better not to fail own statements often f) personally I am the kind of man, who introduces you faster to the own family than to very close friends (female of male) g) ever catching a woman on a lie to me - the sail on the catapult is under pressure
hahaha same! he refused to take me home from the middle of nowhere when I begged him, I froze into a pneumonia and he made me pay for the medicine! ... that relationship ended 🤣
I have had many great men in my life doing all of these and even more - but it pushed me even away. Because I myself wasn’t sure how the future is going to look like let alone grant them to do this for me! I guess that’s why I am still single, and figuring out life. But I don’t regret anything. I have my own path.
Thank you for another insightful video Brian, you always make sense, sometimes you say things that are missing in our relationships but we all need to work on things and accept that sometimes our partner is giving their best but that because of past hurts and emotional trauma they cant give all the things mentioned in youre videos. You give me time to think and reflect on what we need to work on and compromise on. Could you please possibly do a similar video about long distance relationships? Thank you again for always adding you're own unique humour to youre videos i always stay until the end and appreciate you staying until the end too 💯🙌🤗 Hope you have a Fantabulous day 🙂
A very pleasant video,,,thank you very much, showed me the man i love is spot on a lot of these, perhaps all of them, only i missed catching them,,,will have to watch closer to catch them. He definitely has a major portion taken care of. He cares for and about me. Brian your video was enjoyable,,,i laughed at the self point "guilty" about the car, other spots as well, you have a great way of explaining that is understandable. Thanks again.
I’m in my first ever relationship and been dating my boyfriend for 2 months now, he is just as you described. Definitely felt overwhelmed and did make me pull back and it makes me hesitate to be affectionate to him. He has me as his number 1 priority, and I’m lucky to have him. How can I tell him to not over invest in me so quickly, it’s a bit intimidating even though it’s very loving of him?
Be direct. State that you want to take things slow and steady, not rushed. These signs are supposed to reappear later on, which is why they are good. Their first appearance may noy mean the exact same, but with consistancy and care, it may lead to it. Take your time, be prepared for mistakes, focus on communication, and please remember to state your boundaries and feelings. There is no need to rush, especially if it's not comfortable for you. That's my advice Edit: Love bombing is a thing, so be weary of that
You can say something like: "I really appreciate how much you care for me. I think we should take things at a steady pace. It’s a bit overwhelming, even though it comes from a loving place. Let’s slowly grow together in time."
a man said to me he wishes to stand on his feet before he commits because he wants the best for him and i but if ever he thinks of dating someone the first person will be me. is he really into me?
@@Lucy-jc5wg i absolutely get it and a lot of people have told me so but looking at his past actions makes me feel uncertain as to whether i should completely let go of him or not he's so charming and caring lol but when it comes to commitment he just doesn't wanna talk about it and ghosts me completely in the name of his career
But i have a question, After 3yrs of relationship which he also knows im only up for marriage and he accepted it from beginning... now all these signs do exist BUT he told me couple of times if u find someone financially better to get marry to, don't toss him out!!!! What does this mean?? Is he interested with me or not(marriage)??
@sararouhi3942 Then, that's up to you to see if you still want marriage with him and especially if you want to have kids. You can't wait forever. If his economy is improving with his efforts, you might wanna just go ahead and get married. Good luck, sis!
hey brian. last year i had a boyfriend for the first time and it was an awful experience. i was way too naive before and i learnt my lesson. the issue is now i am overly cautious and once i see someone isn't good for me i end it immediately. thus, i couldn't find anyone new. do i need more experience in dating? i think i already experienced a lot. or am i doing good by staying away from things under the bar i set?
It's should be a balance. You shouldn't do marathon dating but be open for a new try. The first love, especially if it was awful, is the hardest experience ever. Trust your institution but don't be driven by fear.
You don't need to date. It isn't mandatory. I never dated, I swe it as a waste of time. Time you sholld spend with friends, family if you have a good relationship with them, and on yourself like hobbies. I Am 22. Comparing myself to women my,age that do dating, I have it so much easier and I am so far ahead. Plus you don't need experience for a good relationship, you need bulletproof self esteem and high standarts.
@@CordeliaWagner1999 i agree mostly but i also think i shouldn't label all dating experiences as bad. we should be open to it but high standarts and self esteem is a must
Meet his parents as soon as possible. Either he will be like them sooner or later or his parents will be a problem. I know all my friends parents. One of my male friends mother thought I as his girlfriend when we accidentally met her while grocery shopping. She was extremely nice and we had coffee in a Cafe and she invited us for Dinner at the weekend. She got big time MAD when I dropped I was not his girlfriend. But that was after Dessert so at least I got a free meal out of it. She now freaks out every time she sees me. A decent man with a highly narcicisstic mother. We are of course still friends but if we had a relationship she would be a big problem. She never liked his girlfriends and is very jealous, the prettier the woman the more agressive she becomes. Be aware that a romantic Partner comes with a whole l7fe and be sure you get along with all of that. I have a woman walking sround and screaming slurs whenever she sees me.
All of these things are important to me but I had no idea there was a timeline. For example, I always expected any guy who wanted to be with me to be protective from the start. However, I rather like the idea of the unfolding theme. Knowing what to look for, and when, makes the anticipation more fun. I'm a little slow in getting used to new people in my life anyway, so I can wait. Great video.
I don't date. Being someone's No 1 priority sounds exhausting. I have a male friend who is in l8ve with me. He has his own life and much going on, I have much going on. I would feel like a caretaker and social worker if he wanted to see me all the time. We are at the same University and spend our breaks often together, but I would never neglect my friends, family and hobbies to be with him. He gets along extremely goid with my grandparents, I have horses and teach him horseback riding he is friends with my 3 besties. If he comes along, perfect. But not giving up anything for him. His mother ha te s me and she freaks out and starts yelling slurs when she sees me. We can't celebrate holidays with her family, and my family gives a big easter and a big Christmas party where my 3 besties and their parents come. He always comes alone... If we had a relationship that would be horrible.
So, it wasn't my exhb, and I meet plenty of 'options' in real life, not online, that exhibit a good amount of these traits, but often they are long time friends who are committed, so how and where does one find the man who thinks 'she' is 'the one' and worth all of the hassle?
This is also when friends will attempt to sabotage the relationship. They can do it in 2 ways, the bros before hoes pack. Making comments about your going to marry her, which can scare some guys off, or they will go out of their way to find fault and pointing out all the stuff hes going to have to give up by pursuing the relationship. When in fact, they may not be asked to give up anything at all. Ivehad female friends adversly influence potential relationships, through jealousy. Thete are a while hist of reasons why some people can't be trusted to give relationship advice.
A prime example is, if you want her you need to achieve this financial goal. Then by the time that goal is reached, the ship has sailed. The sad reality being that that goal wouldn't have made any difference. It's just an obstacle to the relationship.
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To every woman listening to this awesome video today I say look hard at your guy and see if he is doing all of these behaviors.
Any guy who makes excuses instead of doing every one of these signs Brian mentions is not worthy of your time, period.
We women twist ourselves into pretzels and rationalize all kinds of bad behavior just bc we want *this guy* to be *the One*
I was 61 and still doing this!
But it hurt so much I finally took Brian's advice, looked at that bad behavior from the guy who said he loved me (yet would never talk about the future, etc) and once I got my own mind clear about what was true and stopped making excuses for this man who wasn't truly loving me, I walked away. That was THE best decision, ever!
A few months later I met a man who showed every single one of these behaviors consistently as we started dating seriously. I married him and we are celebrating our 2nd anniversary soon. Don't waste your precious life on any man who isn't stepping up and moving heaven and earth to make you HIS woman. Life is too short to waste and you deserve nothing less than true love! As you get older you start seeing it really does boil down to these facts... How does he treat you??? Don't make excuses, get honest!
Very uplifting as I am single at the same age and have given up hope but not now!!!❤❤❤Glad you valued yourself xxxx
What if noone ever treats you that way ?
@milenao4455 YOU treat you that way, hold up your own worth, develop yourself, become the person you would want to be with. Doing that instead of looking incessantly for the ONE attracts the right kind of person to you. ❤️
61????????
@@milenao4455better to be alone that to be treated badly or waste your life with someone who doesn’t like or love you truly. No?
Or are you desperate for D?
My ex did all this until we got married. Then it turned out he's a covert narcissist. Watch out for these types!
how long into your relationship were you when you got married?
@ozlem3293 15 months
Mine was the same....and we didn't get married for 10 years! 😔
@@melaniesuhr4180 I feel for you. Have you met someone else?
@@georginadoll6372 that's a long time to hide his narcissism-maybe he gave hints?
My ex showed all this behavior early on. Not only talking about the future, but actually meeting of our families very soon, taking on my cues etc. And then turned out to be an avoidant as the relationship deepened… very disapointing and hurtful.
same goes with me, signs are temporary
same here
Same here
Almost same thing
Him wanting to meet your family so soon is a red flag. He should've been focusing on getting to know you first. When men try too hard, it’s often a red flag.
Hmmm
A true man will be respectful of every woman. Of course there is difference with a “special one.” But how he is with all women or people is how he’s going to be with you when the “pink cloud period is over.”
This was my late husband and I. I was fortunate. Thanks for the memories. 😊
Me too! For 31 years I had the best!
Me too. I had 10 and a half years with the greatest guy ever. He died 5 years ago from cancer. I had great memories.
I met a man like this not long ago. All in. Wanted to move closer to me. Already planning a trip to see my family next Spring (they live abroad) etc. Then the deal breaker happened. He turned into this wounded boy who was actually looking for a parent. Sorry, but that's not me. I don't want a child.
Same story here😢
Samee
So sorry...some need therapy and not a partner...
@ireefree2024 so true
me seeing all of these signs after he worked hard to break my walls and yes, he always reassures me and asks for my reassurance as well. oh my.
Omg the picking out curtains next weekend had me dying! It’s so true!
I recognize the signs now that you shared this video. Thanks for bringing this information to the forefront, so we women will be able to read our men better.
Always waiting for your monthly video. Lots of material to think about. Thanks for sharing, Brian!
Yes, people fall in love sometimes but then they fall out of love. (and not at the same time!) Nothing lasts forever. Our life is a long journey full of dissapointments... The biggest challenge is getting old alone ... but it's a good lesson, to learn that life is not about selfish pleasures and fun but constant self development etc..
Love is willing to put in the effort even when you may not feel the love!
@@lilililia472 you are right, but that‘s not what avoidant attachment style is about
I have been married for just under two years.That loving look has disappeared, he seems to need more alone time.I think Iam starting to feel less interested also.We get along o.k.,but I notice less communication.My husband is 15yrs. Younger and I expect some of that.But I do not want to chase or beg my husband.Will he come around?
You can’t fall out of love. Love is eternal. What you referred to is an attraction.
@@UrsaBellano, you can definitely fall out of love. I did, more than once. But sometimes love is forever. When my dad died, my parents were married for 56 years at that point. My mom lived 8 more years but alone. My parents were really in love, you could tell.
Excellent video!! Thank you for spelling it out for us, Brian.
If Someone Treats me like an “Option”,
Deuces. 🏃♀️💨💨✌️
RUNNING.
You described my husband, the signs are much more accurate than verbal love declarations.
Thank you! My man met all of them☺️☺️☺️ I am lucky
❤❤❤
This video made me smile and resonated with my current wonderful, budding, finally healthy relationship ❤💗🫶🏻
As a man I can only speak about myself (regarding the last part of the video and its question):
a)
beside of what you have seen, ...maybe I went to the bar's toilett with your female friend yesterday, 10 minutes after introducing - I will not sleep with you fast when I have interest
b)
I want to get to know you, per dates and activities, at least a little
c)
I will not share much about my personal life, instead I let the woman talk and get my idea about her values and personality in this way
d)
but I do ask about her social constellation (family, colleagues, friends - relationship with father, how many male friends she has, ect.)
e)
if you say things to me as your idea, like: "It wont be easy for you, to get rid of me" - well, I will test that out. Better not to fail own statements often
f)
personally I am the kind of man, who introduces you faster to the own family than to very close friends (female of male)
g)
ever catching a woman on a lie to me - the sail on the catapult is under pressure
Great to know that I’ve never been any guys “The One” 💀💙
I laughed so hard at this, because same 😂 thanks for the laugh x
hahaha same! he refused to take me home from the middle of nowhere when I begged him, I froze into a pneumonia and he made me pay for the medicine! ... that relationship ended 🤣
Same ☹️
I don't think that man exists. I'm going to be single forever 😢
Be open and vibrate on a higher level . Trust Devine timing 🤩
They don’t, I’m just working on accepting it and being happy single 😊
Lucky ones get to have that *special person*
We unlucky ones are trying hard to keep our heads above water
My bf and I watched this tg.. everything hit the nail on the head!!!
Why are we trying so hard to figure things out? It’s plain and simple that some people are just bad news.
7:50 This part was so funny! “…because that’s too close to the planes…” 😂🤣😂
As someone with many phobias, I can relate!
I have had many great men in my life doing all of these and even more - but it pushed me even away. Because I myself wasn’t sure how the future is going to look like let alone grant them to do this for me! I guess that’s why I am still single, and figuring out life. But I don’t regret anything. I have my own path.
Figure out your attachment style because you could be using deactivating strategies without even realizing it. Looking for flaws, distancing, etc
Not always, some man are lazy as hell less effort, they want to drag women in their level low energy, low vibration...
Thank you for another insightful video Brian, you always make sense, sometimes you say things that are missing in our relationships but we all need to work on things and accept that sometimes our partner is giving their best but that because of past hurts and emotional trauma they cant give all the things mentioned in youre videos. You give me time to think and reflect on what we need to work on and compromise on. Could you please possibly do a similar video about long distance relationships?
Thank you again for always adding you're own unique humour to youre videos i always stay until the end and appreciate you staying until the end too 💯🙌🤗
Hope you have a Fantabulous day 🙂
What LDR? man you met online or you already met personaly and just get separated by a distance?
You are so adorable ❤😍 Thank you for another great one, Geert :)
A very pleasant video,,,thank you very much, showed me the man i love is spot on a lot of these, perhaps
all of them, only i missed catching them,,,will have to watch closer to catch them. He definitely has a
major portion taken care of. He cares for and about me.
Brian your video was enjoyable,,,i laughed at the self point "guilty" about the car, other spots as well,
you have a great way of explaining that is understandable. Thanks again.
4:52 if you have to ask that, you can't become a priority, end of story, leave ASAP
Very timely! Great content! Totally agree!
Thank you for the video.
Thank you so much for the points. I really enjoy your kind of humour.
Nice work keep going 👍
thank you brian!
We're not even dating but there is guy that I hang out with treating me like this.
So do you want more than friendship than give him a sign..
He had me staring at my own car😂😂❤❤
nice one, thank you ❤
I’m in my first ever relationship and been dating my boyfriend for 2 months now, he is just as you described. Definitely felt overwhelmed and did make me pull back and it makes me hesitate to be affectionate to him. He has me as his number 1 priority, and I’m lucky to have him. How can I tell him to not over invest in me so quickly, it’s a bit intimidating even though it’s very loving of him?
Be direct. State that you want to take things slow and steady, not rushed.
These signs are supposed to reappear later on, which is why they are good.
Their first appearance may noy mean the exact same, but with consistancy and care, it may lead to it.
Take your time, be prepared for mistakes, focus on communication, and please remember to state your boundaries and feelings.
There is no need to rush, especially if it's not comfortable for you.
That's my advice
Edit: Love bombing is a thing, so be weary of that
You can say something like:
"I really appreciate how much you care for me. I think we should take things at a steady pace. It’s a bit overwhelming, even though it comes from a loving place. Let’s slowly grow together in time."
I told my boyfriend that I felt smothered- he got it 😂
This sounds like love bombing.
Love the word play on your pen name. Genuinely appreciate your videos. Thanks! Brian truely Knox. 😊
a man said to me he wishes to stand on his feet before he commits because he wants the best for him and i but if ever he thinks of dating someone the first person will be me. is he really into me?
Ask your heart. Your heart knows and won’t lie to you. Best wishes for your future with him. ❤
No.
No. Run. X
@@georginadoll6372 what makes u say so? Btw thanks b. Much love
@@Lucy-jc5wg i absolutely get it and a lot of people have told me so but looking at his past actions makes me feel uncertain as to whether i should completely let go of him or not he's so charming and caring lol but when it comes to commitment he just doesn't wanna talk about it and ghosts me completely in the name of his career
You don't love it when I stick around til the end anymore? 😭
He did say it at the *very* end 😊
lol
I was waiting for that too. I’m glad he said it lol
But i have a question,
After 3yrs of relationship which he also knows im only up for marriage and he accepted it from beginning... now all these signs do exist BUT he told me couple of times if u find someone financially better to get marry to, don't toss him out!!!!
What does this mean?? Is he interested with me or not(marriage)??
The right man for you will fight for you, if his willing to lose you his not your man, sometimes they do regret giving up but the damage been done.
It's been 3 years, but why are you guys not married yet?
@honeyyu1474 that's true..
@corichang cause of his economical status which he is still trying to improve it
@sararouhi3942 Then, that's up to you to see if you still want marriage with him and especially if you want to have kids. You can't wait forever. If his economy is improving with his efforts, you might wanna just go ahead and get married. Good luck, sis!
Im experiencing this and i confirm he does all this 🥰
My mind: Please run away, you deserve a better man in your life.
hey brian. last year i had a boyfriend for the first time and it was an awful experience. i was way too naive before and i learnt my lesson. the issue is now i am overly cautious and once i see someone isn't good for me i end it immediately. thus, i couldn't find anyone new. do i need more experience in dating? i think i already experienced a lot. or am i doing good by staying away from things under the bar i set?
It's should be a balance. You shouldn't do marathon dating but be open for a new try. The first love, especially if it was awful, is the hardest experience ever. Trust your institution but don't be driven by fear.
You don't need to date. It isn't mandatory. I never dated, I swe it as a waste of time. Time you sholld spend with friends, family if you have a good relationship with them, and on yourself like hobbies.
I Am 22. Comparing myself to women my,age that do dating, I have it so much easier and I am so far ahead.
Plus you don't need experience for a good relationship, you need bulletproof self esteem and high standarts.
@@CordeliaWagner1999 i agree mostly but i also think i shouldn't label all dating experiences as bad. we should be open to it but high standarts and self esteem is a must
Meet his parents as soon as possible. Either he will be like them sooner or later or his parents will be a problem. I know all my friends parents. One of my male friends mother thought I as his girlfriend when we accidentally met her while grocery shopping. She was extremely nice and we had coffee in a Cafe and she invited us for Dinner at the weekend. She got big time MAD when I dropped I was not his girlfriend. But that was after Dessert so at least I got a free meal out of it. She now freaks out every time she sees me. A decent man with a highly narcicisstic mother. We are of course still friends but if we had a relationship she would be a big problem. She never liked his girlfriends and is very jealous, the prettier the woman the more agressive she becomes.
Be aware that a romantic Partner comes with a whole l7fe and be sure you get along with all of that.
I have a woman walking sround and screaming slurs whenever she sees me.
Great 👍 thanks 🎉
Waiting for my God-Ordained Spouse.
All of these things are important to me but I had no idea there was a timeline. For example, I always expected any guy who wanted to be with me to be protective from the start. However, I rather like the idea of the unfolding theme. Knowing what to look for, and when, makes the anticipation more fun. I'm a little slow in getting used to new people in my life anyway, so I can wait. Great video.
It's just easier to stay single.
BINGO
I don't date. Being someone's No 1 priority sounds exhausting. I have a male friend who is in l8ve with me. He has his own life and much going on, I have much going on. I would feel like a caretaker and social worker if he wanted to see me all the time. We are at the same University and spend our breaks often together, but I would never neglect my friends, family and hobbies to be with him. He gets along extremely goid with my grandparents, I have horses and teach him horseback riding he is friends with my 3 besties. If he comes along, perfect. But not giving up anything for him. His mother ha te s me and she freaks out and starts yelling slurs when she sees me. We can't celebrate holidays with her family, and my family gives a big easter and a big Christmas party where my 3 besties and their parents come. He always comes alone... If we had a relationship that would be horrible.
Ladies please don’t be beholden to this - you decide.
I don't think I am ever going to find the man who treats me like this😅
You look at the wrong places.
this is hilarious...you should be a stand up comedian...dts/usa
Well... Thank you 😊😉👌
So, it wasn't my exhb, and I meet plenty of 'options' in real life, not online, that exhibit a good amount of these traits, but often they are long time friends who are committed, so how and where does one find the man who thinks 'she' is 'the one' and worth all of the hassle?
Also, as weird as it is, the name is actually the first half of my married name that I kept.
😂😂😂😂 how funny her first name is missing many men will fail to remember 😂😂😂😂. ❤
This is also when friends will attempt to sabotage the relationship. They can do it in 2 ways, the bros before hoes pack. Making comments about your going to marry her, which can scare some guys off, or they will go out of their way to find fault and pointing out all the stuff hes going to have to give up by pursuing the relationship. When in fact, they may not be asked to give up anything at all.
Ivehad female friends adversly influence potential relationships, through jealousy. Thete are a while hist of reasons why some people can't be trusted to give relationship advice.
A prime example is, if you want her you need to achieve this financial goal. Then by the time that goal is reached, the ship has sailed. The sad reality being that that goal wouldn't have made any difference. It's just an obstacle to the relationship.
@@angelm6497 Yes,I agree. I am independent in our relationship.I know my husband would be there for me.
Is it the same with avoidants? Do they show up when they find The One?
❤❤❤
❤