Before Vs. After: Coming Out
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 มี.ค. 2018
- "At a certain point, I couldn't keep lying anymore. I couldn't keep saying, 'No, that's not me.'"
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I came out to my boy friend so he knew why we were breaking up, and he came out to me... we are bffs now
Luna 5381 😊
Luna 5381 that’s wild and amazing at the same time
You're very lucky, man. Happy For You
Probably the best possible way a relationship could end.
OMG GOALSSSS
I'm out to my closest friends but the thought of coming out to my parents absolutely petrifies me... I'll get there one day though...
Same!
Same...
It shouldn't be that hard, or at least dont thinnk/keep telling yourself it's gonna be hard, after all they are your parents, and they've spent the most time of their life and your life with you. I'm sure they'll be supporting, after all it doesn't change who you are.
Do it when it’s right for you, but don’t leave it till you have regrets.
yes you'll get there. when I told my mom, she says , let me tell your father. I was fully prepared to do it myself , but she says she wanted too, she would tell him at the right time. when she did finally ,his response was, " sweetheart , I figured that out a decade ago, catch up with the times, are ya blind ". I frickin lost it when I heard about it . lol
I Came out 4 days ago. I'm have so much more confidence now.
isn't it so fuckin freeing? I remember the day after I came out. I lost friends but I still felt so damn free
Description Untitled I haven’t come out yet the only person that knows is my twin sister. I am bi by the way
Description Untitled lucky..
I wish I felt ready to come out now but I think I'm going to wait until I graduate high school because most of my friends are homophobic. -Bi 15 y/o male
Good for you!👏👏
i just came out as bisexual yesterday! 💓
edit: it went great, but my crush is really homophobic so
No cares thought
I'm questioning my sexuality. I believe I'm bi.
Awh congrats! I hope it went well
How did it go? I hope it went great!
Steve N ... Not even gonna take the time to explain the difference.
The biggest thing that changed for me after coming out is that now I don’t have to hide my phone or laptop if I’m watching or reading anything lgbtq+ related
Except it it's.. Um. Nvm.. 😅
I really cried.
I came out 4 or 5 years ago to my mom... She is the only person I trust and she told me that it was just a phase. I don't have the guts to tell her again, years later, that I'm still bisexual, I still like girls, I love one girl.
My uncle is really homophobic... He's the kind of person who talks horrible things about queer comunity... I don't have the guts to tell him.
I really need them to know, not because I wanna show.my gayness or something... Just because I need them to accept me just for who I am. I feel so lost and sad about this... I think I would never be able to talk.
Andrea Enemegio you’re a walking revolution in society yourself. Embrace it. :)
Already told my mom, and she said the same thing, "it's a phase", I'm not gonna tell her again so she shouldn't be surprised if I want to bring my girl home...I just hate being ignored
I’m sorry I pray for you
I'm so sorry, I hope things turn out in the best possible way ❤
Andrea Enemegio You got this girl!! Just wait until the time is right.
I am a closeted 14 year old bisexual female. I have a girlfriend and no one knows. These kind of videos really help me to realize that there are people out there like me.
Don’t listen to people like that, I’m the same, don’t let people pressurise u into coming out, u make your own decision, best to do it if u r gonna move out soon or in a safe environment. Good luck
Same. It just sucks that I can't share my happiness with my family and closest friends
do your hw
Eva Owens we’re here for you 💖
I’m a closeted 19 year old bisexual girl and I know how you feel. Sending you all the love and support 💗💗💗
... I just came out to my parents.
Edit: It went quite well.
Luna 1235410 how did it go ?
How did it go? Are you okay?
Go you👍🏻❤️❤️
Hope it went well❤️💕
all the love
“You are no less of a queer person for it.”
Say it louder for the kids in the back!
*talking about gay marriage with my conservative dad*
Dad: it's not marriage marriage is between a man and a woman yada yada
Leah: dad, but I'm bi, what if I came home with a girl?
*pause*
Dad: as long as she's not a liberal!
Leah Smo Sounds like your father is an idiot. Heh.
Do yourself a favor & move out after you graduate high school and/or turn 18. If he doesn’t get over it it’s his problem not yours. Surround yourself with people who like & love you
Open the closet, and open hearts and minds. Open the door and others will follow behind.
Chivas Aurora yfkflgkrjrjri4voe
💖
Chivas Aurora I’m a alpha so I’ll go I front.
Hoo Lee Fuk ……
Chivas Aurora this made me cry tears of joy
I’m still in the closet ✌🏽
Is the light on? Not to dark? Found your clothes to wear?😅
I think I’m in some place called “Narnia”
I'm past Narnia
What is Narnia?
@@tshiatshipo1264 look it up 😊
I told my mom im bi and she took it as it as phase, i also think shes embarrassed about me, and she wants me to keep it closeted but I don't want to I'm slowly telling more of my family
You should never hide who you truly are. If you think that's the right thing to do (which it is) you do what you need to do.
Same here, keep your head up and don't hide away
If you are younger than 21 IT IS A PHASE DEAL WITH IT.
Amir Rahman did I ask for your opinion?
How is sexuality “just a phase”?
How I came out to my mom:
Me: Hey mom why am I like my hair?
Mom: um... idk
Me: cause I’m NOT STRAIGHT
At this point, I dabbed. I hate dabs, I only did this so I wouldn’t have to look at her. It was great tho and she didn’t really care.
Nerd is The Word i don't know why I laughed so hard at this, I hope she took it in a good way
I think this is the best coming out story ever
lmao
Tea n' Me I want to come out like this but I have naturally straight hair
Lol Imma try this too
This has helped me up things into perspective, I think a lot of people will benefit from this. Thanks buzzfeed 🙌
Cody Whitlock
Cody Whitlock hey i like ur channel im glad i saw this comment and ignore the negativity its often from people with bigger issues than most of us.
Cody Whitlock Subscribe to my channel !💕 NEW VIDEOS WEEKLY✅
Cody Whitlock I always see your name and comments Cody lol. Wanna be friends?
I see your comments everywhere.
“No, here is why.. I know what the F is going on in my head” 🙌🏼♥️
*I just came out to a friend on Monday.* It feels great, I don’t have to hide anything from her anymore and I now have someone to talk to about it.
*Edit: I’m out to 3 people now.*
Good for you! Wish you all the happiness :)
I just came out to my mom
I know what you mean it’s like a weight was just lifted
My now gf (I'm a girl too) told ALL of my friends she liked me before she told me... so I mean I didn't even need to come out to them 😂
ik im a stranger but im proud of you, know that you have support and are valid. Good luck in your journey !
Who else needed this?
Nobody
I did
me
I live in indonesia where being gay is a crime by law now. I can't come out because not only that my family will for sure disowned me in the name of religion, it also possible that i will serve jail time.
The hardest part, i just broke up with my boyfriend of 4 years that been with me this whole time and can't talk to anyone. I turned into a ball of mess and tears every night without able to talk to literally anyone about it.
OMG sama. Emangnya sekarang jadi gay jadi dikriminalisasikan ya?
That's sad if you broke up with your boyfriend. Dunia orang dewasa kok keknya kejam banget ya :(
I'm sorry
I hate hate hate being in the closet. I’m 17, most of my friends already know I’m gay, everyone knows except my family. I wish I could tell them but I just physically can’t.
No one will notice this but I feel like there should be a disclaimer: Find a gay community before you come out because you will need support especially if you arn't in California.
Kevinhillcrest /// NYC
Alright, i can come out (i live in Poland. Very homophobic there 😭) but i will come out in Christmass
Why are so many peoples parents angry that their kids are gay, it doesn’t matter what the gender of their kids partners are♥️
They just want grandchildren and one that actually is their blood mostly they don't care what gender is their partner it's just the fact that they won't have children .or they're supper religious
Well not supper but religious
Exactly! It's such a small thing when you think about it. Okay, that sounded dismissive of the pain and hardship that a lot of gay people have to go through, but that's not what I mean. What I mean is that it changes nothing. If someone tells you they're gay, they've always been gay. Their personality traits are exactly the same as before, it just means they are attracted to the opposite gender.
Banana_Bread 101 because it's unnatural
Gypsy Paver yeah tell that to the thousands of natural species of animals that engage in homosexual behaviour and all the scientific professionals that agree that it is a natural phenomenon
This is really nice. But remember that coming out is 100% optional, you don't own anyone an explanation. And if you think someone could make you have a hard time after you tell them (friends, parents, anyone really) don't feel obligated to tell them, you deserve to feel safe.
And in the case you suspect someone won't accept you, that's not the people you should be around of, you also deserve people that are going to understand and support you if you tell them !
Bp
BDM
i came out yesterday
lonelysunflowers How did it go? I'm proud of you!
cici Yay Congrats!
Congrats!I'm so proud of you!
It doesn't matter what you are at the end of the day we all are humans.
Amen
True 💖
Nah im a cat
Not true
Myrica l jajaja cheeto!!!!
I am bisexual so I plan on coming out to my parents soon but this helped me like a million times more with my friends and all my relationships with friends and others.
I’m 11 and I came out 5 months ago and I’m much more comfortable with my self
Sometimes I think, and I really wish that I was able to come out when I was ready, and not to have been forced to come out when I wasn't. I started to question myself when I was 14, and I tried everything in my power to shove that away. In turn, I lost an opportunity with a girl that I had really liked at the time. When I was 15, I fell in love with this girl who was my best friend. I shoved that all away as well for fear of what my family would have thought, and fear that she wouldn't like me back. I remember when she got into a relationship, she told me that she had really loved me, and I had broken her heart because I would sometimes tell her that I could not date her because she was my best friend and that felt wrong to me and whatnot. I remember going through such a hard heartbreak, and feeling like I was so alone and that nobody was there for me or would understand. In those years, 14 onward, I was closed off from my family. I didn't tell them anything, which really hurt them because I grew up really close to my family. A week after my 16th birthday, my parents found out that I was gay and they did not take it well. I had hinted before, but they pushed that away as well. I got grounded for several months, and my parents didn't trust me as much anymore. They thought that I was ruined by the people I had been around, and that I was lying to myself. It's been almost a year since they found out, and I feel so much happier that I'm able to be free and not hide from my close family anymore. I realize that it's going to take a while for them to accept it, and that coming out to the extremely homophobic side of the family is going to be hard, but truthfully, I'm glad that I've had the experiences I've had, and I wouldn't change myself for the world. So to all of you out there who feel hopeless, things will get better. Not immediately, but eventually. Stay strong
Aryana M God bless you :) I hope things get better for you in the long run and I'm happy you're free 💛
Morgan Dawson Thank you so much :). I wish you the best in everything that you do and send much love ❤️
It's like my own story. Thank you :)
No problem, I hope things are okay for you right now and they continue to get better!
Doololly2001 I’m so glad that you’re much happier now that you’re out. Sometimes the process itself is painful, but the outcome can be really great. Love yourself and spread love 😊
I came out at 14 and now I'm 18 and my family accepts me. I used to think that I was trans but I realized I wasn't a boy, then I thought maybe I'm non binary, now I'm not really sure what my gender is and that's okay. I'm not sure what my sexuality is either, and it's okay to not be sure or to change your mind on what label you use. Don't be worried you're a fraud if you decide a label doesn't quite fit as well as you thought it did. I went through many different labels before I found some that fit me. It's okay to experiment, no one knows who they are at that young of a age and it's alright if you change your mind on what label fits you (if any label does).
I came out at 14 to my family, and to my school this year, or like my classmates (I'm 15) I feel so much better now, earlier I felt like I was lying to people... I don't know, it's hard to explain, but the people who gets it, just gets it, ok?
Ha gayyyyyyy
Jozef Klemens Piłsudski so what? What about it?
pellet ziemniaczany so what? Is there a problem? I'm gay, wow, not
Nessan 02 hey just ignore the trolls, they dont mean it. im really glad your coming out went well and that its made youre life easier :)
Yes as you feel it isn't the truth that your straight. As others assume so. Feel you have to correct them.
Amazing video Buzzfeed! Love is love
Didn't know mental illness is love, but whatewer
Jozef Klemens Piłsudski Didn’t know having a squirrel on your face was okay, but whatever.
The Confuzzled Potato
Pardon me?
Jozef Klemens Piłsudski being who you want to be with who you want to be with isn’t a mental illness, being ignorant to the fact that people live different then you do is, it’s called narcissism.
Chelsea Lynn Jones yeah it’s a lack of self control
I'm 13 and I'm trans female to male and I'm so lucky to have a supportive, well mainly supportive, family. You are beautiful no matter who or what you are :-)
Shmem That’s great to hear :)
Shmem 💙
Same. I haven’t even told my parents.. Also, heya sans the skeleton
Shmem a "girl" in my year is transistioning and he prefers male pronouns and a male name and it is adorable seeing how the teachers are so accepting, always calling him preferred pronouns and name during name-call.... and I am now also proud of your family equally
Ur a man now
Nikki. You have no idea how much I needed to hear what you had to say in this video. Thank you. ❤️
this is very moving I'm so proud of all of you
I actually love this video it feels like a movie ❤ .
Yea it makes me want to be gay now.
AirCactus lol
Needed this today.
Thank you.
I absolutely love this
This video was what I needed right now, I was thinking about this today right before this video. Helped me calm myself, thank you
Captain Aryes same for me
This is the content I’m here for! Thank you Buzzfeed ❤️
I’m about to cry. This video is so beautiful ;)
Tonight I'm going to come out as transgender to my mom.
Edit: I'm FTM so He/Him pronouns please :)
also, update in comments
TØP Trash please let me know how it goes it went great for me I hope the same goes for you. What are your pronouns (so I know how to refer to you)
Good luck! I hope it goes well for you.
Good luck :)
Good luck!! ❤️❤️
Good luck, friend.
I'm so glad everyone I came out to was accepting - my family, my friends. I'm truly grateful for that.
These are the reason why I'm subscribed to buzz feed. Thx u so much
10 minutes lmao, my heart is still racing and it’s been ten minutes since I came out 😂
I came out today!! And it went well!!
I feel sad for those people who still feel the need to "come out", when it shouldn't even be that way. I never came out to my parents, relatives, and friends literally, or through words, this feel the need to announce that I'm gay, never even happened to me. Throughout that moment where I feel that I was "different", I just gone with it. It just grew to those people who surround me, and automatically understand that I'M DIFFERENT, that I'M GAY. No question asked, I didn't even have to say a single word. I was lucky enough that people actually understood from the beginning about who I really was, and I don't even need to say it. It seriously made me feel normal than ever, just because of that. To those who are still struggling, just keep your head up. Right time will come, and things will get better.
Thank you so much for including Jen's point about people not coming out. I didnt realise until now that it was something I wanted and needed to hear.
I came out in January my mom said as long as I’m happy❤️ it took me a year to come out just take ur time. I have a girlfriend and I feel so happy❤️❤️
Congrats!! It's always great to hear this@
Good for you and congrats!
welcome to the rainbow club, we have cake
Katlin O'Neill Thank u
Aaliyah S
I came out to my mum in january too :-) finally!
Im 28 and just came out and this has helped me so very much. Its been hard for me trying to be someone i wasnt and now im slowly getting to where i want to be
Im so happy for you
this is the most useful info i’ve gotten since i’ve come out: don’t hide your rainbows. if you want to find someone else with rainbows, but you’re not showing yours, it’ll be much harder. the best people come into your life when you’re being yourself, not someone else.
ainsfoxy
There's this poem by Shel Silverstein that remonds me of your comment. It goes:
"She had blue skin,
And so did he.
He kept it hid
And so did she.
They searched for blue
Their whole life through,
Then passed right by-
And never knew."
Katrina J. yeah, that’s where i got it from. the poem means a lot to me
Thank you. I needed this today
Instant favourited. Thank you for the video, this is truly a good one.
I just came out as asexual today.
aimee 21 good for you 👏👏👏
I m still in the closet.
@liza alexeeva Just come out When you feel safe enough💕
I wish I had as much courage as these people. I struggle to even think about coming out without anxiety to the point where I feel like I'm either going to throw up or cry. This was a great video though and it helped me have a little more of a level head.
I needed this
Thank you for the insider :) also I'm loving the Demogorgon pin!
My principal outed my close friend to his parents even though when my principal asked him if he wanted him to talk to his parents my friend said no. I was so mad when I heard this. Our school is very small (our class has 50 people which is how my principal found out) I and I knew our school was extremely homophobic however how could a person with authority do that. And because my friend is only out to his parents and his friends he know he can’t do anything without risking getting outed completely which he is not ready for. I don’t care what you believe people should get to decide who they are and tell other people on their own terms
I'm pansexual and I feel that I don't need to come out so I don't think I will.
Andrew Little I feel exactly the same!
Andrew Little I’m pansexual too. It’s the best. Everyone is hot. But I came out to my mom/fam/friends
Cerina Shippey im so proud of you for doing this, your so brave.
madison twede its good to not feel alone.
What is pansexual?
Thank you for making this.
Literally I’m in tears 💗
Its hard.... But they are brave❤, wish I was like that
Nikki is just so nice
This hit right in the feels. I spent years pretending to be someone I’m not and I felt like I had this huge weight on my shoulders. As soon as I came out and started taking T my life completely changed and I feel so happy and free now.
I'm 16 and out to everybody sexuality-wise, have been since I was 13 or 14. It was very hard for me to work up the nerve to come out to my family but I knew it'd be better to do sooner rather than later because I was and still am very certain about my sexuality. Overall it went pretty well except with my dad. I think it's very inspiring to hear other people's stories because it helps me connect deeper with my community as a whole, and gives me strength knowing that there are others who understand and have been through similar experiences out there
seeing all the dislikes makes me sad. the lesson in this video also warms my heart
"DO NOT GIVE UP"... Thank u buzzfeed
I just came out to my step-mom and she is so supportive and it makes me so happy
Your all amazing! This video is amazing!
I just started dating this awesome girl and now that I'm out I can share it with the people I care about. I had to hide my last girlfriend from everyone.
Im so happy for you
I'm still in the closet, but I'm dating my best friend of four years and I think I might marry her one day. Both of our families are accepting, my family pretty much already knows and has almost forced me out actually. Her younger sister is pan (though her younger sister came out as pan the day after my girlfriend told her that she might like girls and then dated one girl as to prove her point, but has been dating guys ever since so my girlfriend thinks she did it as a way to overshadow her because she has a history of doing such things, this was years and years ago by the way) so her family is already accepting, her dad even told her it was ok if she was gay or "half gay". I'm just personally not ready yet, plus we just kind of want to enjoy our relationship on our own for as long as we can.
I’ve always felt very lucky to live In the time I do and with my family being accepting of it because I was never really scared to come out to my parents (the rest of my family is a different story and I’m still not out to them) but from a young age my parents told me that if I was gay it was okay and they would still love me the same and I think that hearing that from such a young age really helped to shape me into the person I am today. I’m so proud of everyone that comes out or doesn’t for safety reasons as long as you’re content with who you are that’s all that is important, it is okay to be gay
This is such an inspirational video. People should defiantly watch this. Thanks buzzfeed I understand a little bit more about this. ❤
It is so sad the one in the red shirts mother would be awful to her!
I'm not gay but that was powerful.
Loooved this video!!❤️
This made me cry. For years it was a struggle to be out of the closet and proud. But I’ve been out now for 3 years and I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. I’m 100% me at this point. #biandproud
It makes me so happy to see this, I am in an extremely religious family and the religion is extremely homophobic. I always have wanted to come out and get it off my chest but I know I would be in danger if I did. I would just disappoint everyone around me and that would crush me. I don’t think I will ever come out to anyone of my family but seeing things like this really makes me happy to see that they are all happy in their lives!!!
Return to Jesus and give up those lies!!!!!
Wish you the best! ❤️
If your family is Christian/any religion, they should still love you for who you are! Relationships with God shouldn’t be about rules and strictness! I pray for your success and happiness!!❤️
Me too and that’s fine... just try as much to be you and tell them intolerance is not in the picture of what you believe in. I love you ❤️
I love you guys
*gays
+ gals, and nonbinary pals
Thanks for sharing some sensitive topics buzzfeed. Keep them coming.
Out of all the crap buzz feed makes, this one was actually really good! I can relate and I just wanted to say thank you! This video made me just feel really good.
Omg i feel so emotional
💖💖💖
Mina Bae lol wtf
Anyone remember when TH-cam was basically coming out videos every week
Uh the good old days
This was the best video I have ever seen in my life .....🥺 I'm not yet adult but I have came out to my close friend and that feeling was so satisfying 😌
Wow a video that actually informs and helps in a way from buzzfeed. The only one in existence here
I came out to my Dad as Bisexual. He didn't like it and told me go to see a doctor. It teared my heart and my whole family didn't support my relationship with a girl. Then now I break up with her and I felt like I don't wanna love anyone else. Cause I'm afraid of hurting.
Don't worry. You can just live independently without your parents restriction if you're already 18. :D (I'm assuming you're still under 18)
I'm bi and I'm scared to come out but I'm going to!
Hope it goes well
Me too, Amanda
So empowering to hear others stories I hope this helps everyone that has been struggling with this 👏🏼💚
This video is so reassuring and comforting! I’ve been in this mindset this fine pride month of being me and presenting myself as myself is the best thing possible. And honestly, it is. And to be able to see that there are other people out there just like me is so so comforting I can’t even describe it
I'll do it someday 😃
Good luck
Oh gosh
This is amazing!
I will forever support and think so highly of everyone who faces these struggles that come with being yourself. I’m proud of everyone who endures
I'm gonna make it big when I come out.
Aaaaand no one cares
• Emmai Nightcore • don’t worry be brave! Even tho I’m not lol
This is such a cute video
Ok but the piano in the background reminds me of my alarm for school and I kept getting nervous, lol.
I enjoy Buzzfeed's new approach to these topics.
Who is the guy he's so cute
Im going into the wave of comments
Pray for me 😥
Why is it bad?
I came out to my brother like a week ago, months after I did so with my parents. He surprised me by fully supporting and understanding me.
I absolutely loved this video!!!