👌More videos can be found on this topic at: th-cam.com/play/PLcB3trehXswjSvwE8zV5YPISXOHgkH5I5.html&si=0YM6L9M7iZoG8d9K ❤️Self help activities and worksheets and concierge coaching with Dr. Snipes can be accessed at DocSnipes.com 👍Online Courses for Continuing Education (CEU, OPD, CPD) and Substance Abuse Counselor Certification
That helped me realize what I have since I was born. I was in the hospital for the first 3 weeks of life because my mom and family alphas mumps. This was in the 50s so letting a baby cry instead of spoiling them was the normal way in hospitals. I have always felt like I was alone in the world. Trusting people is hard.
Take time to become your secure attachment. Be sure to listen and watch your thoughts to stay mindful of how you think and process information. Steadily and slowly start taking your common thoughts away from the torrent and give them attention. Understand that you are not your thoughts but your thoughts, even the ones that suggest harm, are valuable. They indicate how you are feeling when confronted with your world. The more you practice listening and paying attention to your thoughts the more you will get to know yourself and stop judging yourself for the thoughts you have. Your emotions are real and never lie. Your thoughts are not actions you have to take but suggestions to protect yourself, sometimes with unhelpful coping mechanisms. You and your thoughts have value just for their existence. Please don't forget that. When a bad thought comes just think about when your pet acts up and does something bad. We will see it, correct it nicely, and love it shortly after.
I'm 55, I've watched about ten of your videos in the last two days. Thank you, thank you, thank you for your work. You've given me hope, and I haven't felt that in a long time
@@DocSnipes hmmm, I want to give you a real answer which involves. I'm not really sure other than making peace with myself, giving myself grace, and keeping promises to myself. That's where I'm starting at least. Then it moves onto trusting other people. So, that's what o have for today
I went to therapy for five years. Barely got into something like this. When I'm pushed and pushed and pushed I actually get violent. I've said to people listen to me. Listen, listen. It's as if I'm shut down. I was raised in a abusive home, my mom was and still is a good mom but, I still get told and she doesn't want to hear my thoughts or feelings my father was a schizophrenic and lord knows our lives revolved around him, to no avail since he enevitably took his life. I had to take care of all the funeral bc no one else could bc of the trauma they felt. I was shocked but, I took control of the situation. I still like quiet and tend to get manic around the world of people out there anxiety I've lived with my entire life. I'm strong emotionally but I'm inside holding a nuclear bomb of emotion. Something to work on I suppose. I trust no one although you'd never know. That's for insight to myself.
A lot of people have attachment issues. Once you have more understanding, it's easier to be in a loving and kind relationship, because there's a context for why they do what they do and you have compassion and don't take it personally. So much of what people do shouldn't be taken personally.
But you 2 have firm strong boundaries safeguarding 4 the shock value of improper Behaviours whether it's intentional or not. Every behaviour can be explained but as u mature in age u don't have shelf time 2 put up with unexpected & expected behaviours anymore. There r Pple who still let their 14yr old minds thoughts behaviours dictate their 30 or 40 or 50+ yr old self & attitudes!
I can definitely identify with all of this I know I didn't have a relationship with my parents, and have shown all of those symptomms throughout my life.
That was interesting..thankyou. I am hazarding a guess, that most people do not have secure attachments. From what I can see historically, parents did not have a clue, even if they were well intentioned. I guess it is changing these days; people are becoming more conscious, but could be slow.
True,good enough parenting is sufficient,nobodys perfect.However,when its way below that,the kids start using dysregulated coping strategies and beliefs that they bring into adult relationships
@@scarred10 Good enough comes from people who are somewhat healthy. I would say that is probably one third of the US population. How many kids get all their Maslow's needs met. How many have healthy attachment to caregivers? The reason we so many problems in society has to do with people having unresolved issues like these from childhood and are completely unaware of them other than knowing there is something wrong them but not sure what it is or what to do about it.
@@DocSnipes Dear Dr Snipes, thank you for answering. To be honest, I follow your lectures in order to educate myself for dealing with my 24 yr old niece suffering from severe depression, anxiety, addiction. So sad. Kind regards from East Germany. Kerstin, 52 yrs
Thank-you so much! I've spent 68 years wondering why I had so much trouble expressing myself- even to myself. It's, really, a ,"so close, but so far away" experience! And that's not a cause I haven't thought of before. But, you know, your perspective must be incomplete too.
65 years of trying to fully express myself. Jus wanting to support others by taking the opportunity to reply to comments in the gentlest way, Many of my earlier comments to various videos were two line and never to reply on others comments. At this moment I am feeling empowered to offer more communication, I wish you to find your courage to express yourself as fully as you dare.
If your caregiver doesn't know how to identify their emotions, wants or needs, they can't teach you to identify them. End up trying to figure it out as an adult.
I don't know how I ever could have formed a secure attachment. My father (definately a narcissist) always told me that he didn't want me, had a boy and a girl, and if abortion was legal then, I wouldn't be here. I avoided him like the plague, because he would scowl at me, or kick me, slap me upside the head, or a combo of abuse. My siblings would curry favor by being horrible and abusive to me. And it worked well for them. I still don't understand why it was my fault. Clearly they knew how pregnancy happens. My mom had her master's in OBGYN, and my father worked in medical science. Speaking of my mom, she had mental issues, and a high degree of narcissistic tendencies herself. She forced me to be on an Olympic level cross country training team, then would leave me at practice long after everyone else had been picked up and were probably in bed. At 8 years old, I'd be standing alone outside the local middle school track until after10 PM. The same with any other activity I participated in. Girl scouts, chorus, band front etc. Neither parent ever came to watch those events, obviously. I damn well knew I was unloved, unsupported and unwanted. I cried, standing in the dark, often cold and or rainy night. When nobody cares about you, others pick up on it. Teachers treated me badly, so kids did too. I'm trying to get past it, but at 55, I still don't know how to heal. I had a therapist ask me to tell her my story, and half way through, she asked how it was that I hadn't killed myself yet. Yeah. Real helpful. I never went back.
I wear a lot of clothes which do not fit. Pants too loose, shoes a bit tight,. socks with holes (sometimes wear one thick sock and one thin, it helps knowing my left foot from my right). Do wear what fits right, has the feel and look for the occasion occasionally. Listening with this reduced my shame swelling. Will be interested when time has passed what reply I will make to my comment. It is good to hear what you need to say. Thankyouthankyou
I just lost a 10 yr one but it was my ex girlfriend that has severe Complex childhood trauma and repeatedly broke up for seems like very minor issues,she simply has only immature coping method,supress or run away.
Thank you so much for watching, Joy. That’s a really good question. When it comes to behavior, we choose the behavior that is most rewarding. What are the benefits of your behavior? Are you doing it because you hope it will eventually give you what you want? Are you doing it because that’s how you’ve been doing it all your life and you are primed like that? Are you choosing to enter in relationships with partners that are unwilling or unable to give you what you want (because that’s familiar or for any other reason) ? You could try forming a secure attachment with yourself. Do you know how to use CRAVES for that?
I have labored to form a secure attachment with my parents to this day with mixed result. I believe my situation can be adequately be characterized as CPTSD my mental health agency goes as far a offering the label unspecified trauma. I believe their upbringings left them deficient to my childhood. I believe it is a miracle I have survived myself. My answer to your question is YES.
Secure within myself has been misconstrued into a multitude of "diagnosise," all of which miss the point: there ARE individuals who DON'T want nor have time for "a secure(EVERYONE HAS THEIR OWN DEFINITION) attachment" to another person. I fit into that category: INTJ. If you research that specific type, you will learn that we thrive being ALONE. Think "Spock"(Star Trek) & you start to understand. Emotions are wholly illogical to me: I function on logic & data stacks: NONE of that fits the "accepted social definition" of being a woman. I see emotions as drama & walk away. "Attachment" underlines an expected outcome, meaning there is an emotional attachment to that outcome. 95% of the pain in this world is directly attached to outcomes that didn't evolve as "expected." ...most of that occurs based on perception, & acting thereon, rather than real data to bolster or debunk the perception. I'm not a robot... I just prioritize things differently than most, & see what I watch play out around me as a tragic waste of time & energy, that could be better spent tackling situations that make things better, easier, safer, HEALTHIER for everyone. Alas...short-sightedness be the bane of human existence...🖤
Your Meyer's Briggs doesn't mean that you don't want or have time for secure attachments. You can cultivate that environment of respect for yourself and others while alone. Taking the time to comfortably be yourself when in the presence of others and be vulnerable with strangers is not an ability tied to your personality. This is a practice that takes effort to grow just as any other. You will still be drained by social interactions but your perception of them and yourself will start to change as you develop your own security. I respect that you do not want take this practice seriously. You are wonderful the way you are today and do not need to change. This is a practice that will allow you to feel less drained by the drama of the world, the thoughts you have in your mind, and the choices you have to make in your life as you will be able to understand your core values. You will always have a defined path forward that does not drain you or cause excess pain from worry or stress. That's what the security means. The attachment means that you are able to trust. When things go wrong you can trust yourself that you will be okay. You can trust that no external factors can change who you are. You can trust that your decisions are the right ones for you. Attachment doesn't underline and expected outcome. Attachment means that no matter what the outcome is you are aware of yourself as separate from the outcome. I hope this new perspective helps open some doors for you :)
@@justinbancroft5917 YOU'RE NOT LISTENING: ***I don't NEED nor WANT any such a "beast" as a "secure attachment."*** NO AMOUNT of word salad will convince me otherwise. _Not interested. No time._ Got it now???🖤
My husband's favorite Star Trek character is Spock from the original series. I think he would identify somewhat with your philosophy. Even Spock had attachments to his family and close friends, though. I hope you consider some attachments in time... You do sound very in touch and at peace with your philosophy. Live Long and Prosper. 🙂🖖
@@DocSnipes Spock from original series is EXACTLY who I ment... It is difficult to function logically in a world where that mindset is increasingly deliberately villainized as "the criminal"(referencing most of the recent movie plots) to render ineffective. It is equally sad that logic gets a bad rap. Emotionally driven addiction to approval seems to now rule every facet of the human social dynamic... something I bristle at. Regarding Spock's family dynamic, IF I had anything like he did, I too would have embraced it. There are 2 kinds of ppl in this world you cannot pick... family & neighbors. I rest my case...🖤
@@catherinerhea6336 It doesn't take time away from anything you do. It's, at most, an exercise in logic applied to mental health. It can be completely solo just as Spock acts. He IS self assured and confident and attached to his values and beliefs. He could be an epitome of secure attachment as he knows that his values of logic will never fail him and he will act with them in mind, always. Every perspective taken on the world is one that can help provide secure attachment. Any time spent convincing yourself of anything (such as working through a problem with critical thinking) can also double as solidifying your values and security as well. I promise you have the time. Especially if you're able to comment about it on here.
RIGID BOUNDARIES SEEM TO BE COMMON IN ALCOHOLIC 🏠🏡 HOMES, ABUSIVE CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES , UNAVAILABLE PARENTS CAUSE ,(** ACES**)! RIGHT DR. SNIPES 💭🤔💭🤔? 3/13/2023
Yes, you are right. Thanks for watching the video. What did you find most useful from it? If you’re interested in videos on creating secure attachment, you can find them at: th-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=secure
Unlimited CEUs for $59 at AllCEUs.com. Based on this channel's videos and the proceeds support our continued mission to make these resources available.
You're absolutely right. While secure attachment can provide a strong foundation for emotional health, it’s not a guarantee against mental health challenges. Brain chemistry plays a significant role in how we experience and process emotions, and some individuals may be predisposed to certain mental health conditions from birth, regardless of their attachment history. For instance, someone with a secure attachment might still struggle with anxiety, depression, or other challenges due to their brain chemistry or other factors like genetics, temperament, or environmental influences. This highlights the complexity of mental health and the many factors that contribute to it. Acknowledging that both attachment and brain chemistry are important helps us understand that mental health is multifaceted. It also reminds us that healing and growth can require addressing both emotional patterns and underlying biological factors. Your comment adds an important perspective to the conversation, emphasizing that while secure attachment is valuable, it’s just one piece of the puzzle. If you’re interested in learning more about attachment, please don’t hesitate to use my Ai: allceus.com/AskDocSnipes. Also, I’d be grateful if you were to share what was most useful from the video.
@@ThereIsAlwaysaWay2 firstly, you dont get medical advice on youtube,if you want that you go to Doctor or psychologist. Furthermore ,as I have no idea where you live,there may be few therapists qualified near you but the are certainly many near me in Ireland and nobody would be charging over 100 euro other than a psychiatrist.
👌More videos can be found on this topic at: th-cam.com/play/PLcB3trehXswjSvwE8zV5YPISXOHgkH5I5.html&si=0YM6L9M7iZoG8d9K
❤️Self help activities and worksheets and concierge coaching with Dr. Snipes can be accessed at DocSnipes.com
👍Online Courses for Continuing Education (CEU, OPD, CPD) and Substance Abuse Counselor Certification
That helped me realize what I have since I was born. I was in the hospital for the first 3 weeks of life because my mom and family alphas mumps. This was in the 50s so letting a baby cry instead of spoiling them was the normal way in hospitals. I have always felt like I was alone in the world. Trusting people is hard.
Thanks for sharing. Wishing you, peace, health, and, happiness.
Can you make a video on how to shift from anxious to secure attachment? Practical steps and exercises etc? Please reply 🙏
Yes please. We would love tools and techniques
Following 2.
Take time to become your secure attachment. Be sure to listen and watch your thoughts to stay mindful of how you think and process information. Steadily and slowly start taking your common thoughts away from the torrent and give them attention. Understand that you are not your thoughts but your thoughts, even the ones that suggest harm, are valuable. They indicate how you are feeling when confronted with your world.
The more you practice listening and paying attention to your thoughts the more you will get to know yourself and stop judging yourself for the thoughts you have. Your emotions are real and never lie. Your thoughts are not actions you have to take but suggestions to protect yourself, sometimes with unhelpful coping mechanisms.
You and your thoughts have value just for their existence. Please don't forget that. When a bad thought comes just think about when your pet acts up and does something bad. We will see it, correct it nicely, and love it shortly after.
Thanks for watching.
@@justinbancroft5917 Very nice. Thank you.
I'm 55, I've watched about ten of your videos in the last two days. Thank you, thank you, thank you for your work. You've given me hope, and I haven't felt that in a long time
You’re so welcome. Thank you for watching. How are you planning to create secure attachment
@@DocSnipes hmmm, I want to give you a real answer which involves. I'm not really sure other than making peace with myself, giving myself grace, and keeping promises to myself. That's where I'm starting at least. Then it moves onto trusting other people. So, that's what o have for today
I went to therapy for five years. Barely got into something like this. When I'm pushed and pushed and pushed I actually get violent. I've said to people listen to me. Listen, listen. It's as if I'm shut down. I was raised in a abusive home, my mom was and still is a good mom but, I still get told and she doesn't want to hear my thoughts or feelings my father was a schizophrenic and lord knows our lives revolved around him, to no avail since he enevitably took his life. I had to take care of all the funeral bc no one else could bc of the trauma they felt. I was shocked but, I took control of the situation. I still like quiet and tend to get manic around the world of people out there anxiety I've lived with my entire life. I'm strong emotionally but I'm inside holding a nuclear bomb of emotion. Something to work on I suppose. I trust no one although you'd never know. That's for insight to myself.
Wow I'm glad I found a great site. Its very informative. I'm a psychologist and mainly implement "Attchment therapy"
So welcome. I appreciate you watching
I have the last three. I am working on myself and making progress. Thank you for this video.
You are so welcome!
A lot of people have attachment issues. Once you have more understanding, it's easier to be in a loving and kind relationship, because there's a context for why they do what they do and you have compassion and don't take it personally.
So much of what people do shouldn't be taken personally.
thankyou, it is good to read fundamental truths.
But you 2 have firm strong boundaries safeguarding 4 the shock value of improper Behaviours whether it's intentional or not. Every behaviour can be explained but as u mature in age u don't have shelf time 2 put up with unexpected & expected behaviours anymore. There r Pple who still let their 14yr old minds thoughts behaviours dictate their 30 or 40 or 50+ yr old self & attitudes!
Thanks for watching! Wishing you peace, health, and, happiness.
@@DocSnipes thank you 4 this teaching & explained clearly. I'll listen 2 it again & apply it. You're very good!
I don't even know what my wants, needs, boundaries or stress signals are. Are there former videos that teach how to identify these things? Thank you!
This was great... Very grateful for your work.
Thanks for watching.
I can definitely identify with all of this I know I didn't have a relationship with my parents, and have shown all of those symptomms throughout my life.
Thanks for watching! Wishing you peace, health, and, happiness.
That was interesting..thankyou. I am hazarding a guess, that most people do not have secure attachments. From what I can see historically, parents did not have a clue, even if they were
well intentioned. I guess it is changing these days; people are becoming more conscious, but
could be slow.
i am willing to accept slow hope, thanks for your comment
True,good enough parenting is sufficient,nobodys perfect.However,when its way below that,the kids start using dysregulated coping strategies and beliefs that they bring into adult relationships
@@scarred10 Good enough comes from people who are somewhat healthy. I would say that is probably one third of the US population. How many kids get all their Maslow's needs met. How many have healthy attachment to caregivers?
The reason we so many problems in society has to do with people having unresolved issues like these from childhood and are completely unaware of them other than knowing there is something wrong them but not sure what it is or what to do about it.
This was very helpful. I recall your words whenever a difficult moment comes up.
Thank you so much for watching. I feel blessed to be of help. How are you planning to create secure attachment?
@@DocSnipes Dear Dr Snipes, thank you for answering. To be honest, I follow your lectures in order to educate myself for dealing with my 24 yr old niece suffering from severe depression, anxiety, addiction. So sad. Kind regards from East Germany. Kerstin, 52 yrs
Thank-you so much! I've spent 68 years wondering why I had so much trouble expressing myself- even to myself. It's, really, a ,"so close, but so far away" experience! And that's not a cause I haven't thought of before. But, you know, your perspective must be incomplete too.
65 years of trying to fully express myself. Jus wanting to support others by taking the opportunity to reply to comments in the gentlest way,
Many of my earlier comments to various videos were two line and never to reply on others comments. At this moment I am feeling empowered to offer more communication, I wish you to find your courage to express yourself as fully as you dare.
Thanks for watching! Wishing you peace, health, and, happiness.
Powerful information thank you Doc Snipes! 🙌🏻💯🌞💯
👍👍
Thank you! ♥️
I am sorry I missed the live stream.
I went to read the live chat,
there was nothing,
perhaps there wasn't a live stream.
@@danielraypickrel4316 there was a live stream. Very few people commented and the comments start later in the video. 😊🌸
No problem 👍😊
@@DocSnipes thank you for understanding. ❤️🌹🕊
I think I felt something amiss as a teenager and still don't have it figured out decades later.
Thanks for sharing. Wishing you, peace, health, and, happiness.
If your caregiver doesn't know how to identify their emotions, wants or needs, they can't teach you to identify them. End up trying to figure it out as an adult.
Expressing whatever you can identify now is a good place to be. thanks for sharing where you are.
@@danielraypickrel4316 your video helped me realize some things. Thank you.
My mom did the best she was able.
Thanks for watching!
Thanks for all your help and advice Doc.
Thank you for your support, Curly Ginger
I don't know how I ever could have formed a secure attachment. My father (definately a narcissist) always told me that he didn't want me, had a boy and a girl, and if abortion was legal then, I wouldn't be here. I avoided him like the plague, because he would scowl at me, or kick me, slap me upside the head, or a combo of abuse. My siblings would curry favor by being horrible and abusive to me. And it worked well for them. I still don't understand why it was my fault. Clearly they knew how pregnancy happens. My mom had her master's in OBGYN, and my father worked in medical science.
Speaking of my mom, she had mental issues, and a high degree of narcissistic tendencies herself. She forced me to be on an Olympic level cross country training team, then would leave me at practice long after everyone else had been picked up and were probably in bed. At 8 years old, I'd be standing alone outside the local middle school track until after10 PM. The same with any other activity I participated in. Girl scouts, chorus, band front etc. Neither parent ever came to watch those events, obviously. I damn well knew I was unloved, unsupported and unwanted. I cried, standing in the dark, often cold and or rainy night. When nobody cares about you, others pick up on it. Teachers treated me badly, so kids did too. I'm trying to get past it, but at 55, I still don't know how to heal. I had a therapist ask me to tell her my story, and half way through, she asked how it was that I hadn't killed myself yet. Yeah. Real helpful. I never went back.
I am so sorry to hear that. How awful they all sound! I hope you find a way to happiness now. Your story is heartbreaking.
There are many great therapist out there, it takes a bit of research and trial and error to find one. Don't give up. Hugs.
I'm interested in this one!!!
5 for 5, was like you were reading from a script describing me
Have you ever thought of taking a break? She's a machine!🙂
Lol.....Maybe one day. 😀
I wear a lot of clothes which do not fit.
Pants too loose,
shoes a bit tight,.
socks with holes
(sometimes wear one thick sock and one thin, it helps knowing my left foot from my right).
Do wear what fits right,
has the feel
and look for the occasion
occasionally.
Listening with this reduced my shame swelling.
Will be interested
when time has passed
what reply I will make to
my comment.
It is good
to hear
what you need to say.
Thankyouthankyou
Thank you for all you do!
Thanks for watching.
This is me to a tee. And the reason why I just lost a 7 year relationship 😕
I just lost a 10 yr one but it was my ex girlfriend that has severe Complex childhood trauma and repeatedly broke up for seems like very minor issues,she simply has only immature coping method,supress or run away.
Why am I “sharing” or asking or being vulnerable or exposing myself if it doesn’t get me what I want?
Thank you so much for watching, Joy. That’s a really good question. When it comes to behavior, we choose the behavior that is most rewarding. What are the benefits of your behavior? Are you doing it because you hope it will eventually give you what you want? Are you doing it because that’s how you’ve been doing it all your life and you are primed like that? Are you choosing to enter in relationships with partners that are unwilling or unable to give you what you want (because that’s familiar or for any other reason) ?
You could try forming a secure attachment with yourself. Do you know how to use CRAVES for that?
I keep asking what CEU's are. Can someone enlighten me, please?
Thanks for watching the video. CEUs stand for continuing education units.
Thank you
Thanks for watching.
Well then hello spirit guide thanks for sending me this.
Thanks for watching.
I doubt if Africans formed secure attachments as kids. African parents didn't even know such a thing exists.
They just follow tradition without understanding but the kids have a lot of adult and community support.
Thanks!
Thanks, Dee
You don't dare share your needs and wants with a narcissistic person.
That's good strategizing for sure.
Thanks for watching.
Caregiver? Partner? Spouse?
Thanks for watching and commenting.
That's probably me
Thanks for watching.
Yes 👍, GOOD AWARENESS AND HONESTY, NOW ID DA PROBLEM U CAN WORK ON DA SOLUTION 🎤✍️🎵🎧🎶🌈🕯️▶️🙌💌💥💝🔥🚒🔥🚒🔥💖❤️🔥🙏😇🙏😇🙏
YOUR NOT 🚫 ALONE MOST ADULT CHILDREN OF ALCOHOLIC PARENTS FIT HERE TOO🤔💭🤔🤔🎶🎶🎵🎵🎶🌈🎤😎😍☄️😍☄️💕❤️🔥💖🔥🚒🔥🚒🚒💥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥😇🙏😇🙏😇
Can this be related to Cptsd?
Yes! Lack of a secure attachment often occurs because of Adverse Childhood Experiences which in turn cause cPTSD
I have labored to form a secure attachment with my parents to this day with mixed result. I believe my situation can be adequately
be characterized as CPTSD my mental health agency goes as far a offering the label unspecified trauma. I believe their upbringings left them deficient to my childhood. I believe it is a miracle I have survived myself.
My answer to your question is YES.
nice inclusion of strategies.
Thanks for watching!
Secure within myself has been misconstrued into a multitude of "diagnosise," all of which miss the point: there ARE individuals who DON'T want nor have time for "a secure(EVERYONE HAS THEIR OWN DEFINITION) attachment" to another person. I fit into that category: INTJ. If you research that specific type, you will learn that we thrive being ALONE. Think "Spock"(Star Trek) & you start to understand. Emotions are wholly illogical to me: I function on logic & data stacks: NONE of that fits the "accepted social definition" of being a woman. I see emotions as drama & walk away. "Attachment" underlines an expected outcome, meaning there is an emotional attachment to that outcome. 95% of the pain in this world is directly attached to outcomes that didn't evolve as "expected." ...most of that occurs based on perception, & acting thereon, rather than real data to bolster or debunk the perception. I'm not a robot... I just prioritize things differently than most, & see what I watch play out around me as a tragic waste of time & energy, that could be better spent tackling situations that make things better, easier, safer, HEALTHIER for everyone. Alas...short-sightedness be the bane of human existence...🖤
Your Meyer's Briggs doesn't mean that you don't want or have time for secure attachments. You can cultivate that environment of respect for yourself and others while alone. Taking the time to comfortably be yourself when in the presence of others and be vulnerable with strangers is not an ability tied to your personality. This is a practice that takes effort to grow just as any other. You will still be drained by social interactions but your perception of them and yourself will start to change as you develop your own security.
I respect that you do not want take this practice seriously. You are wonderful the way you are today and do not need to change. This is a practice that will allow you to feel less drained by the drama of the world, the thoughts you have in your mind, and the choices you have to make in your life as you will be able to understand your core values.
You will always have a defined path forward that does not drain you or cause excess pain from worry or stress. That's what the security means.
The attachment means that you are able to trust. When things go wrong you can trust yourself that you will be okay. You can trust that no external factors can change who you are. You can trust that your decisions are the right ones for you. Attachment doesn't underline and expected outcome. Attachment means that no matter what the outcome is you are aware of yourself as separate from the outcome.
I hope this new perspective helps open some doors for you :)
@@justinbancroft5917 YOU'RE NOT LISTENING: ***I don't NEED nor WANT any such a "beast" as a "secure attachment."*** NO AMOUNT of word salad will convince me otherwise. _Not interested. No time._ Got it now???🖤
My husband's favorite Star Trek character is Spock from the original series. I think he would identify somewhat with your philosophy. Even Spock had attachments to his family and close friends, though. I hope you consider some attachments in time... You do sound very in touch and at peace with your philosophy. Live Long and Prosper. 🙂🖖
@@DocSnipes Spock from original series is EXACTLY who I ment...
It is difficult to function logically in a world where that mindset is increasingly deliberately villainized as "the criminal"(referencing most of the recent movie plots) to render ineffective. It is equally sad that logic gets a bad rap. Emotionally driven addiction to approval seems to now rule every facet of the human social dynamic... something I bristle at.
Regarding Spock's family dynamic, IF I had anything like he did, I too would have embraced it. There are 2 kinds of ppl in this world you cannot pick... family & neighbors. I rest my case...🖤
@@catherinerhea6336 It doesn't take time away from anything you do. It's, at most, an exercise in logic applied to mental health. It can be completely solo just as Spock acts. He IS self assured and confident and attached to his values and beliefs.
He could be an epitome of secure attachment as he knows that his values of logic will never fail him and he will act with them in mind, always.
Every perspective taken on the world is one that can help provide secure attachment.
Any time spent convincing yourself of anything (such as working through a problem with critical thinking) can also double as solidifying your values and security as well.
I promise you have the time. Especially if you're able to comment about it on here.
RIGID BOUNDARIES SEEM TO BE COMMON IN ALCOHOLIC 🏠🏡 HOMES, ABUSIVE CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES , UNAVAILABLE PARENTS CAUSE ,(** ACES**)! RIGHT DR. SNIPES 💭🤔💭🤔?
3/13/2023
Yes, you are right. Thanks for watching the video. What did you find most useful from it? If you’re interested in videos on creating secure attachment, you can find them at: th-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=secure
Unlimited CEUs for $59 at AllCEUs.com. Based on this channel's videos and the proceeds support our continued mission to make these resources available.
All things can happen despite a secure attachment. Can be brain chemistry from birth.
You're absolutely right. While secure attachment can provide a strong foundation for emotional health, it’s not a guarantee against mental health challenges. Brain chemistry plays a significant role in how we experience and process emotions, and some individuals may be predisposed to certain mental health conditions from birth, regardless of their attachment history.
For instance, someone with a secure attachment might still struggle with anxiety, depression, or other challenges due to their brain chemistry or other factors like genetics, temperament, or environmental influences. This highlights the complexity of mental health and the many factors that contribute to it.
Acknowledging that both attachment and brain chemistry are important helps us understand that mental health is multifaceted. It also reminds us that healing and growth can require addressing both emotional patterns and underlying biological factors. Your comment adds an important perspective to the conversation, emphasizing that while secure attachment is valuable, it’s just one piece of the puzzle.
If you’re interested in learning more about attachment, please don’t hesitate to use my Ai: allceus.com/AskDocSnipes. Also, I’d be grateful if you were to share what was most useful from the video.
Yep, I've got all five. *Sigh*
Fellow sigh.
Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
Do you know if she still do therapy? Would pay 500$ an hour easy
There are lots of good therapists who do trauma focussed therapy and wont cost the earth .
@@scarred10 That's a lie, been looking for 5 years and tried 8. Plz, if you comment, give helpful info
@@ThereIsAlwaysaWay2 firstly, you dont get medical advice on youtube,if you want that you go to Doctor or psychologist. Furthermore ,as I have no idea where you live,there may be few therapists qualified near you but the are certainly many near me in Ireland and nobody would be charging over 100 euro other than a psychiatrist.
You can email support @ docsnipes.com. Ty