So sorry you had such a bad day .. I identify and empathise. It’s so hard to explain how rock bottom it can feel without enough cortisol. Such a daily struggle… Sending you hugs x
Jill, thank you for sharing such a personal story. I am so sorry that you had to go through that. We all have similar experiences, this disease truly robs our souls. We are in this together. We all get tired, 95% of the time I am a fighter but the other 5% is pitiful. You do so much for this community and we so appreciate you and we are here for you. Stay blessed.
My journey with AI hasn't been easy. Like you, I have a trauma history. I completely crumpled and broke down mentally in 1999 just days after holding my older brother's hand as he took his last breath. I'm in no way ashamed of my mental illness. I'm not ashamed of what I call my crazy years where I think I spent more time in a mental hospital than out. But I've been a fighter my whole life. I fought like hell to find a better way to manage my life. Unfortunately, because I was diagnosed with mental illness when my symptoms of AI began to become severe I was dismissed by every medical professional except my PCP. It was a 6½ year fight for my life. In 2011 I had what I know now was likely a crisis. My cognitive function was impaired and I was forced into a mental hospital. Because I had about 12 visits to the emergency room with symptoms in the mental hospital it was used as a cause to strip me of my independence. They said I was attention seeking and nothing was wrong again. I was given 2 choices. I could have a court-ordered conservator or they talked to my ex-husband. I could move out of my apartment and move in with him. He would be my "caretaker". Sadly even my family thought I was crazy. Truthfully at this point over the last 6 years of being told it was all in my head, I started to believe them. Mind you during these 6 years I had numerous hospitalizations for bradycardia, hypotension, and other symptoms. Exploratory surgery for the mysterious flank pain and they considered putting in a pacemaker. I passed out more times than I could count. But still was being told that it was all in my head. About 6 months after losing my independence and moving in with my ex-husband I again was at the emergency room. It was about 9pm and I was thrown out. Told if I didn't leave I would be arrested. I don't remember much. Somehow I made it to my pcps office when he opened at 8am the next day. I wasn't driving at the time because my health had declined so much I had a medical hold. My pulse was 32bpm and they couldn't register my blood pressure. My doctor flipped out and sent me back to the emergency room by ambulance and I was promptly admitted. Later he told me he didn't know how I survived the night. It was this hospitalization that finally prompted my PCP to test for AI. I remember him saying that he didn't think it would be positive because it's so rare. He was the only medical professional who did believe me through the 6½ years. I'm not sure I'd be alive today if not for him. Finally, I had an answer. I can remember having a few visits after being diagnosed and those same doctors suddenly had a huge attitude change. But not a single one of the medical professionals who told me I was crazy said sorry. But at least now if I present in the emergency room I receive immediate care. I spent almost 6 years living with my ex-husband. It was far from perfect. Initially, I needed time for my body to heal. Not even a year after my diagnosis I had a very bad fall and was in a wheelchair for 6 months before having surgery to repair a bad fracture in my foot. Then my home town suffered from fires that destroyed so much. The rental market became a mess as so many displaced people suddenly needed homes. I decided to wait until the market opened up again. I eventually did find a beautiful apartment but life was far from perfect. I have a twin brother who sadly suffered from addiction. We lost our father when we were 14 and our mother had also passed. Because of his addiction, he made many poor choices and I was the only person in our family who helped him. Well here is where a lifetime of trauma and AI nearly took me down. You talk about how you go back to all the thoughts in your head. My twin was abusive to me our whole life. He knew how to manipulate me perfectly. Despite finally having my independence again my life was far from perfect. My twin would show up at my door. I would go into survival mode as he would explode. He was manipulating me to get anything he wanted. Food, money, clothes, a car you name it. I was so terrified of him that I would just give him whatever he asked for. My health was worse than it had been before being diagnosed, but I didn't see it. I was always sick, gaining weight even though half the time I was living on rice and beans because I was feeding my twin. I was a hot mess mainly because I didn't understand how to manage my AI. I was told never to updose, especially for something as silly as emotional stress. I hadn't found groups on Facebook yet and believed the doctors. During the Pandemic my daughter moved. I am getting older and started looking at moving too. I'm disabled and the stimulus checks provided an opportunity that I never could have had because all my money was going to support my twin. I planned carefully and decided to move. My twin didn't respond to this well. Especially as my move day got closer. He became even more abusive and was doing all he could to keep me there. The night I left he exploded. He left me in a crisis, literally. But he was out of my house for a moment and I knew if I didn't leave right then I'd never be able to. I just remember using my emergency injection and taking a handful of oral steroids. I loaded a moving van with what I could and left. I didn't understand just how bad my health had gotten until I arrived and settled in a new home. The damage I had suffered nearly cost me my life. I've been here 3½ years now and it took 2½ years just to regain my health. One of the things that made things so hard was the struggle to find any type of support from medical professionals. I foolishly thought after being diagnosed that things would be better. After all, we have a treatment option when so many rare diseases don't. But I quickly learned that I can not count on medical professionals. That if I want to be healthy and to thrive it is up to me to be proactive and to fight for my needs. This move as challenging as it was has been full of blessings. I for the first time in my 55 years of life am free from abuse. I after seeing 7 other endos over the years found my perfect endo. Despite not knowing a thing about the pump she knew I needed it. She spent the time talking to her colleagues and learning everything she could. I started using my first pump in June. Sadly I have no relationship with my twin now, by his choice. But freeing myself from his abuse has opened my eyes to how much damage I let happen by enabling him. I have no idea why I've said all this. I think because I want you to know that I understand just how much trauma fu*** with us. That makes an already challenging disease so much worse. That if we aren't careful and we stay in the abuse it will kill us. To say that even in the very worst I have found more blessings than I can ever count. Most of all to say you're not alone. It's okay to cry. It's okay to have moments that this disease just pisses us off and it's okay to be angry. Just know that while the rest of the world doesn't get it, your fellow Addy Warriors do. You are loved, you are valued, you are appreciated. Thank you Please forgive grammar errors.
Oh friend...this was written beautifully...you are an amazing human. I am so sorry you have experienced all this. You are right there are always blessings on the toughest journeys. Thank you so much for sharing your story...love to have you on the podcast if you are interested ❤Please take care ❤
Wow Jill thank you for sharing. We have a lot in common! Let me know if you ever want to chat more about it. Hugs to you and all those who have a shared experience.
Thank you for sharing this very vulnerable moment… as a newly diagnosed person , I hate it too! What’s beautiful about you is that you offer to others the support that you didn’t get ..
Thank you friend for watching and your comment...it was a tough one to do and open up about...fight hard friend you got this...we are all in this together.❤
Jill, yes, those of us dealing with this "get it". We hear you and are here for you. You have been here for us. My Endo doesn't believe that low cortisol affects my moods, fears etc. It does. Even a slight up dose can give me relief. Take care of yourself, first :) ..and you ARE a lovely and worthy woman. Keep sharing, so we can give back a little!
Thank you so much for sharing Jill. ❤ I too had a spouse that appeared to be supportive until he wasn’t and became physically abusive. For a long time I blamed me.. for all of it, I thought I was broken and that I broke him. But he was very unwell also. 😢 and although I’m better off without him, I still struggle. Addison’s pisses me off!! It’s exhausting fighting so hard!! I fought for a dx.. I fought for proper treatment.. now I fight to get thru each damn day!! I’m exhausted!! I hate this disease most days! I felt like a burden for so long.. now I have no family left to burden. It’s Not easy talking to people who have no idea of what we go thru on a daily basis especially if we look well!! My endo thinks I should just be happy with my limited life.. since I spent most of 2017 in the hospital, a 3 months stay in long term care to learn how to walk again, and 7 months in a retirement home (I was 50 at the time 😢) and the only reason I made it was so my Mom who was 85 didn’t lose her only child. You’re so right, this disease sucks your soul!! And when I get low, I get extremely emotional and confused and often can’t determine if I’m just sad or if it’s low cortisol.😂 i’m not sure why at this point I even doubt updosing. 🤦♀️ but I do! So many things you talked about resonated with me. It is so important for us to share these experiences so we don’t feel so alone!! I just wish I lived closer so we could go for a coffee ☕️!! Sending hugs from Orillia Ontario! Thank you for being so honest!!
I hear you friend....I completely get it and yes I wonder why I doubt my updosing too...I know what it feels like but I still doubt...emotional, confused, triggered...in so many ways...keep fighting friend...maybe we can do coffee one day!! ❤
Jill thanks. I have a similar abuse journey to Addison and you verbalize very well the void of low cortisol. I have no one, family abandoned me and calls me a liar. I have palpitations in every crisis, usually 246 bpm average 75mins. Medical team have me a written warning for being in crisis and refused to help me with my period dose. Currently in same emotional state. Love you Jill, thanks for bearing your soul. I see it, it's strong jill.
With age, I've become so emotional during my low cortisol moments. When nobody is around, I just break down crying my tiredness and feeling miserable. I also don't like how I've become this person who apologises apologises everything, almost like I'm apologising for my own existence. I've had problems with my work life, and I've burned out a few times. Now, I'm going through this rehabilitating course with people with different mental or physical challenges, and my classmate just told me not to apologise all the time.😂
aww jill so true and heart wtenching iv recently split from my husband of 38yrs similar circumstances but you know what your a fighter and survivor you hang on in there were with you
Jill, I go to the same emotional crying emotional state in pain every day because of my adrenal insufficiency. I was trying to ask some advice from you about up dosing. i’m a 60-year-old man married 42 years. It’s really tough on my wife this emotional roller coaster weakness no energy,no delight in the things I used to do. So far I’ve been on the couch for four days. They won’t let me up dose so I have to be careful with my steroids I have a little bit of prednisone for emergencies, but I know what you’re going through, I’ve already lost all my friends
I understand that completely...why won't they let you updose? Wish I could give specific advice but unfortunately I am not able to...can you get a new doctor?
I go see a new endocrinologist at the end of November. I’ve been calling every day to see if I can get in sooner. Oh, by the way, I’m still sitting on the couch trying to get energy to get a snack. If you’re wondering, family went on vacation I can’t go because I have an adrenal insufficiency walking from the couch to the kitchen. It’ gets me totally exhausted.
I completely understand, I don’t have a life, 5 days a week and that’s the only time I go outside, I was physically and sexually, abused the worst was when my stepdad put a gun in my mouth and raped me, I was 11 when my mother returned from work, I told her, she slapped me, and we all went to church like nothing happened, (SICK!) when I was 15 and living on the streets I was raped and became pregnant, and when I had my son I think that was 😢😢the first symptom but I was treated for depression, and would be constantly in an out of the hospital I’ve flat lined during three of my 20 + surgery 😮 but then I started to pass out, it was blamed on my kidneys, I got the worst crisis in 2019 my heart stopped I was in hospital for 6 months, coming in 130,I was as losing weight rapidly, by month 4 I was down to 63 pounds then I was unable to keep anything down, they inserted a feeding tube that got infected causing me to go septic, I was then told to make a will and appoint someone as my power of attorney, the way I felt is undescribable, as the tears flowed all i wanted was to hold my 3 kids, the two younger ones were were on their own. my son wasand he took care of his sister who has mild to moderate scoliosis and Spastic diplegia cerebral palsy, I tell yah, he is truly a precious gift, So back to my mother, I had not seen or spoken to her in over 20yrs, so to shock of my life when I opened my eyes and saw her sitting watching me sleep, I didn’t know if I wanted to sink into the ground or press my call bell or security 😮so finally after about almost 10min of awkward silence she said hello, she found out from someone on facebook, Then she got straight to the point using her shit don’t stink voice she asked them to page my doctor, and she tore into him told him that his whole team are imbecile and by the time she was done this man was redder than a tomato, she then signed me out, and I was taken the hospital where she is the chief of staff. For the next 2 two and a half months I was poked and prodded and I must have seen over a hundred doctors had some telling me it’s in my head, I’m looking for attention, among the brutal treatment i endured . and done every test in the book, Then she called one of her colleague at St. Mikes who told her to do the Addison Test , I did two, the one that they inject you something take blood 🩸 you wait an hour then they take more, the other one I had to catch my pee first thing and don’t remember everything “sorry” I was then put on prednisone it was messing with my eyes I gained 80 pounds in three months but I didn’t like how fast I was gaining, I would be awake for days, I was vomiting again, and the sweating is sooooo bad, I was then changed to cortiff,. BUT MY DARLING JILL, YOU ARE AN UNBELIEVABLE STRONG PERSON WHO IS EDUCATING AN HELPING SO MANY PEOPLE, YOUR LOVED AND NOT ALONE, IM SO GRATEFUL FOR YOU AND WHAT YOU DO, YES THIS SUCKS!! I feel like a shell of a person, I’wish we could sit and talk, because girl the things that I’ve gone through is unbelievable evil. Ok confrontation time, I mutter up the courage to confront my mother, but before she spoke I told her I forgive her, it felt like tons were lifted off me, her answer was she she always believed me but she didn’t want her marriage to end and she couldn’t stand to look at me because I looked like my father who I’ve never met, however she apologized and took accountability. JILLYOU ARE TRULY A WARRIOR! AND IF WE ARE ABLE TO TALK ABOUT THE HELL WE’VE,WE ARE NO LONGER A VICTIM WE ARE VICTORS!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING AND IM SORRY FOR WHAT YOU’VE BEEN THROUGH, YOU MATTER AND YOU ARE LOVED 🥰 MORE THAN YOU KNOW. NEVER STOP FIGHTING WARRIOR JILL ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Did your dr give you ways to adjust your personal dose...the LIVING WITH ADDISONS book and the Addisons Self Help Group in the UK has great regulations for us...and of course prevention...rest, healthy diet etc. ❤
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I don't think doctors understand the role of cortisol in mental health, or the impact of chronic illness. And always here for you!!
Completely agree..thank you for being there for me ❤
Hi Jill, I was discharged from the hospital yesterday with Addison's. Thank you for sharing.
All the best friend. You got this ❤️
Thank you Jill for sharing how we all feel. When we share we don’t feel as alone. Love you ❤
So sorry you had such a bad day .. I identify and empathise. It’s so hard to explain how rock bottom it can feel without enough cortisol. Such a daily struggle… Sending you hugs x
Jill, thank you for sharing such a personal story. I am so sorry that you had to go through that. We all have similar experiences, this disease truly robs our souls. We are in this together. We all get tired, 95% of the time I am a fighter but the other 5% is pitiful. You do so much for this community and we so appreciate you and we are here for you. Stay blessed.
My journey with AI hasn't been easy. Like you, I have a trauma history. I completely crumpled and broke down mentally in 1999 just days after holding my older brother's hand as he took his last breath. I'm in no way ashamed of my mental illness. I'm not ashamed of what I call my crazy years where I think I spent more time in a mental hospital than out. But I've been a fighter my whole life. I fought like hell to find a better way to manage my life.
Unfortunately, because I was diagnosed with mental illness when my symptoms of AI began to become severe I was dismissed by every medical professional except my PCP. It was a 6½ year fight for my life. In 2011 I had what I know now was likely a crisis. My cognitive function was impaired and I was forced into a mental hospital. Because I had about 12 visits to the emergency room with symptoms in the mental hospital it was used as a cause to strip me of my independence. They said I was attention seeking and nothing was wrong again. I was given 2 choices. I could have a court-ordered conservator or they talked to my ex-husband. I could move out of my apartment and move in with him. He would be my "caretaker". Sadly even my family thought I was crazy. Truthfully at this point over the last 6 years of being told it was all in my head, I started to believe them.
Mind you during these 6 years I had numerous hospitalizations for bradycardia, hypotension, and other symptoms. Exploratory surgery for the mysterious flank pain and they considered putting in a pacemaker. I passed out more times than I could count. But still was being told that it was all in my head.
About 6 months after losing my independence and moving in with my ex-husband I again was at the emergency room. It was about 9pm and I was thrown out. Told if I didn't leave I would be arrested. I don't remember much. Somehow I made it to my pcps office when he opened at 8am the next day. I wasn't driving at the time because my health had declined so much I had a medical hold. My pulse was 32bpm and they couldn't register my blood pressure. My doctor flipped out and sent me back to the emergency room by ambulance and I was promptly admitted. Later he told me he didn't know how I survived the night.
It was this hospitalization that finally prompted my PCP to test for AI. I remember him saying that he didn't think it would be positive because it's so rare. He was the only medical professional who did believe me through the 6½ years. I'm not sure I'd be alive today if not for him.
Finally, I had an answer. I can remember having a few visits after being diagnosed and those same doctors suddenly had a huge attitude change. But not a single one of the medical professionals who told me I was crazy said sorry. But at least now if I present in the emergency room I receive immediate care.
I spent almost 6 years living with my ex-husband. It was far from perfect. Initially, I needed time for my body to heal. Not even a year after my diagnosis I had a very bad fall and was in a wheelchair for 6 months before having surgery to repair a bad fracture in my foot. Then my home town suffered from fires that destroyed so much. The rental market became a mess as so many displaced people suddenly needed homes. I decided to wait until the market opened up again.
I eventually did find a beautiful apartment but life was far from perfect. I have a twin brother who sadly suffered from addiction. We lost our father when we were 14 and our mother had also passed. Because of his addiction, he made many poor choices and I was the only person in our family who helped him.
Well here is where a lifetime of trauma and AI nearly took me down. You talk about how you go back to all the thoughts in your head. My twin was abusive to me our whole life. He knew how to manipulate me perfectly.
Despite finally having my independence again my life was far from perfect. My twin would show up at my door. I would go into survival mode as he would explode. He was manipulating me to get anything he wanted. Food, money, clothes, a car you name it. I was so terrified of him that I would just give him whatever he asked for.
My health was worse than it had been before being diagnosed, but I didn't see it. I was always sick, gaining weight even though half the time I was living on rice and beans because I was feeding my twin. I was a hot mess mainly because I didn't understand how to manage my AI. I was told never to updose, especially for something as silly as emotional stress. I hadn't found groups on Facebook yet and believed the doctors.
During the Pandemic my daughter moved. I am getting older and started looking at moving too. I'm disabled and the stimulus checks provided an opportunity that I never could have had because all my money was going to support my twin.
I planned carefully and decided to move. My twin didn't respond to this well. Especially as my move day got closer. He became even more abusive and was doing all he could to keep me there. The night I left he exploded. He left me in a crisis, literally. But he was out of my house for a moment and I knew if I didn't leave right then I'd never be able to.
I just remember using my emergency injection and taking a handful of oral steroids. I loaded a moving van with what I could and left.
I didn't understand just how bad my health had gotten until I arrived and settled in a new home. The damage I had suffered nearly cost me my life. I've been here 3½ years now and it took 2½ years just to regain my health.
One of the things that made things so hard was the struggle to find any type of support from medical professionals. I foolishly thought after being diagnosed that things would be better. After all, we have a treatment option when so many rare diseases don't. But I quickly learned that I can not count on medical professionals. That if I want to be healthy and to thrive it is up to me to be proactive and to fight for my needs.
This move as challenging as it was has been full of blessings. I for the first time in my 55 years of life am free from abuse. I after seeing 7 other endos over the years found my perfect endo. Despite not knowing a thing about the pump she knew I needed it. She spent the time talking to her colleagues and learning everything she could. I started using my first pump in June. Sadly I have no relationship with my twin now, by his choice. But freeing myself from his abuse has opened my eyes to how much damage I let happen by enabling him.
I have no idea why I've said all this. I think because I want you to know that I understand just how much trauma fu*** with us. That makes an already challenging disease so much worse. That if we aren't careful and we stay in the abuse it will kill us. To say that even in the very worst I have found more blessings than I can ever count. Most of all to say you're not alone. It's okay to cry. It's okay to have moments that this disease just pisses us off and it's okay to be angry. Just know that while the rest of the world doesn't get it, your fellow Addy Warriors do. You are loved, you are valued, you are appreciated. Thank you
Please forgive grammar errors.
Oh friend...this was written beautifully...you are an amazing human. I am so sorry you have experienced all this. You are right there are always blessings on the toughest journeys. Thank you so much for sharing your story...love to have you on the podcast if you are interested ❤Please take care ❤
Wow Jill thank you for sharing. We have a lot in common! Let me know if you ever want to chat more about it. Hugs to you and all those who have a shared experience.
You are amazing my friend...I am glad I am not on this road alone and have friends like you ❤
Thank you for sharing this very vulnerable moment… as a newly diagnosed person , I hate it too! What’s beautiful about you is that you offer to others the support that you didn’t get ..
Thank you friend for watching and your comment...it was a tough one to do and open up about...fight hard friend you got this...we are all in this together.❤
Jill, yes, those of us dealing with this "get it". We hear you and are here for you. You have been here for us. My Endo doesn't believe that low cortisol affects my moods, fears etc. It does. Even a slight up dose can give me relief. Take care of yourself, first :) ..and you ARE a lovely and worthy woman. Keep sharing, so we can give back a little!
Thank you friend for your support..I agree they don't understand how it effects moods and so much more...we need a voice and show them the effects ❤
@@chronicallyfit_withjill Absolutely!!
I have a lot of support from my husband but I still get depressed and suicidal when I am low, especially when it lasts a long time.
Wow. Yep. Those days are hard to manage when low cortisol puts the wall up. Thank you so much for sharing. ❤
Thank you friend for your unconditional support ❤
Thank you so much for sharing Jill. ❤
I too had a spouse that appeared to be supportive until he wasn’t and became physically abusive. For a long time I blamed me.. for all of it, I thought I was broken and that I broke him. But he was very unwell also. 😢 and although I’m better off without him, I still struggle. Addison’s pisses me off!! It’s exhausting fighting so hard!! I fought for a dx.. I fought for proper treatment.. now I fight to get thru each damn day!! I’m exhausted!! I hate this disease most days!
I felt like a burden for so long.. now I have no family left to burden. It’s Not easy talking to people who have no idea of what we go thru on a daily basis especially if we look well!!
My endo thinks I should just be happy with my limited life.. since I spent most of 2017 in the hospital, a 3 months stay in long term care to learn how to walk again, and 7 months in a retirement home (I was 50 at the time 😢) and the only reason I made it was so my Mom who was 85 didn’t lose her only child.
You’re so right, this disease sucks your soul!! And when I get low, I get extremely emotional and confused and often can’t determine if I’m just sad or if it’s low cortisol.😂 i’m not sure why at this point I even doubt updosing. 🤦♀️ but I do!
So many things you talked about resonated with me. It is so important for us to share these experiences so we don’t feel so alone!! I just wish I lived closer so we could go for a coffee ☕️!! Sending hugs from Orillia Ontario! Thank you for being so honest!!
I hear you friend....I completely get it and yes I wonder why I doubt my updosing too...I know what it feels like but I still doubt...emotional, confused, triggered...in so many ways...keep fighting friend...maybe we can do coffee one day!! ❤
Jill thanks. I have a similar abuse journey to Addison and you verbalize very well the void of low cortisol. I have no one, family abandoned me and calls me a liar. I have palpitations in every crisis, usually 246 bpm average 75mins. Medical team have me a written warning for being in crisis and refused to help me with my period dose. Currently in same emotional state. Love you Jill, thanks for bearing your soul. I see it, it's strong jill.
Oh friend...we are not alone with this...we are all together...keep fighting and taking it day by day...I am there with you.
So sorry to hear you have had a similar experience to Jill... ❤❤ 11:25
With age, I've become so emotional during my low cortisol moments. When nobody is around, I just break down crying my tiredness and feeling miserable. I also don't like how I've become this person who apologises apologises everything, almost like I'm apologising for my own existence. I've had problems with my work life, and I've burned out a few times. Now, I'm going through this rehabilitating course with people with different mental or physical challenges, and my classmate just told me not to apologise all the time.😂
I understand that friend...and it is a constant cycle of feeling better than feeling miserable...I feel for you completely ❤
aww jill so true and heart wtenching iv recently split from my husband of 38yrs similar circumstances but you know what your a fighter and survivor you hang on in there were with you
Thank you friend for caring ❤
Very cold
SO SO SO COLD 🥶❤
Jill, I go to the same emotional crying emotional state in pain every day because of my adrenal insufficiency. I was trying to ask some advice from you about up dosing. i’m a 60-year-old man married 42 years. It’s really tough on my wife this emotional roller coaster weakness no energy,no delight in the things I used to do. So far I’ve been on the couch for four days. They won’t let me up dose so I have to be careful with my steroids I have a little bit of prednisone for emergencies, but I know what you’re going through, I’ve already lost all my friends
I understand that completely...why won't they let you updose? Wish I could give specific advice but unfortunately I am not able to...can you get a new doctor?
If it makes you feel any better, I’m going through my morning ritual crying for almost 2 hours until my medicine kicks in
I hate this disease. It seems we-are so alone when we are at our lowest points with low cortisol
I go see a new endocrinologist at the end of November. I’ve been calling every day to see if I can get in sooner. Oh, by the way, I’m still sitting on the couch trying to get energy to get a snack. If you’re wondering, family went on vacation I can’t go because I have an adrenal insufficiency walking from the couch to the kitchen. It’ gets me totally exhausted.
💕🫂
I completely understand, I don’t have a life, 5 days a week and that’s the only time I go outside, I was physically and sexually, abused the worst was when my stepdad put a gun in my mouth and raped me, I was 11 when my mother returned from work, I told her, she slapped me, and we all went to church like nothing happened, (SICK!) when I was 15 and living on the streets I was raped and became pregnant, and when I had my son I think that was 😢😢the first symptom but I was treated for depression, and would be constantly in an out of the hospital I’ve flat lined during three of my 20 + surgery 😮 but then I started to pass out, it was blamed on my kidneys, I got the worst crisis in 2019 my heart stopped I was in hospital for 6 months, coming in 130,I was as losing weight rapidly, by month 4 I was down to 63 pounds then I was unable to keep anything down, they inserted a feeding tube that got infected causing me to go septic, I was then told to make a will and appoint someone as my power of attorney, the way I felt is undescribable, as the tears flowed all i wanted was to hold my 3 kids, the two younger ones were were on their own. my son wasand he took care of his sister who has mild to moderate scoliosis and Spastic diplegia cerebral palsy, I tell yah, he is truly a precious gift, So back to my mother, I had not seen or spoken to her in over 20yrs, so to shock of my life when I opened my eyes and saw her sitting watching me sleep, I didn’t know if I wanted to sink into the ground or press my call bell or security 😮so finally after about almost 10min of awkward silence she said hello, she found out from someone on facebook, Then she got straight to the point using her shit don’t stink voice she asked them to page my doctor, and she tore into him told him that his whole team are imbecile and by the time she was done this man was redder than a tomato, she then signed me out, and I was taken the hospital where she is the chief of staff. For the next 2 two and a half months I was poked and prodded and I must have seen over a hundred doctors had some telling me it’s in my head, I’m looking for attention, among the brutal treatment i endured . and done every test in the book, Then she called one of her colleague at St. Mikes who told her to do the Addison Test , I did two, the one that they inject you something take blood 🩸 you wait an hour then they take more, the other one I had to catch my pee first thing and don’t remember everything “sorry” I was then put on prednisone it was messing with my eyes I gained 80 pounds in three months but I didn’t like how fast I was gaining, I would be awake for days, I was vomiting again, and the sweating is sooooo bad, I was then changed to cortiff,.
BUT MY DARLING JILL, YOU ARE AN UNBELIEVABLE STRONG PERSON WHO IS EDUCATING AN HELPING SO MANY PEOPLE, YOUR LOVED AND NOT ALONE, IM SO GRATEFUL FOR YOU AND WHAT YOU DO, YES THIS SUCKS!! I feel like a shell of a person, I’wish we could sit and talk, because girl the things that I’ve gone through is unbelievable evil.
Ok confrontation time, I mutter up the courage to confront my mother, but before she spoke I told her I forgive her, it felt like tons were lifted off me, her answer was she she always believed me but she didn’t want her marriage to end and she couldn’t stand to look at me because I looked like my father who I’ve never met, however she apologized and took accountability.
JILLYOU ARE TRULY A WARRIOR! AND IF WE ARE ABLE TO TALK ABOUT THE HELL WE’VE,WE ARE NO LONGER A VICTIM WE ARE VICTORS!!!
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING AND IM SORRY FOR WHAT YOU’VE BEEN THROUGH, YOU MATTER AND YOU ARE LOVED 🥰 MORE THAN YOU KNOW. NEVER STOP FIGHTING WARRIOR JILL ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Worn out been up beat
Yes that it how I felt ❤
I ❤u
Love you too friend...thank you for your support ❤
How do you guys handle be g sick? I get sick several times a year, I would say 4-5 and it usually requires that I miss 3-4 days of work. :(
Did your dr give you ways to adjust your personal dose...the LIVING WITH ADDISONS book and the Addisons Self Help Group in the UK has great regulations for us...and of course prevention...rest, healthy diet etc. ❤
Do you have s significant other Jill, your very pretty