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Everyone is the main character in their own movie. Everyone thinks about themselves much more than others. No one cares. Everyone is self interested. Realize this and freedom is yours. People take things at face value. It's freeing because you realize no one's opinion about you actually matters or is true. Even your own opinion about yourself isnt hard-core fact and changes depending on your beliefs about yourself. You create your life and are 100% responsible for everything in your life.
Auditing past interactions is a scary prospect. When someone confronts you and makes you both fear and rage it's hard to say the right thing. You manage not to beat the living shit out of them but feel shame afterwards that you did nothing. One time I had about 100 people all chanting at me in unison to get out, I was drowned out and lost for words. Someone with greater charisma than me got them all chanting. Yes I was the centre of attention on that occasion. Julien is doing a good job at convincing people that this never happens, I think the greater lesson is to have that happen and survive.
My biggest changes to my life came from focusing on lowering my social anxiety and accepting myself for my flaws. It's ok to want to become better and you should work to better yourself in body and in mind, but you have to be ok with being flawed. You will never be perfect, but strive to be better always and accept where you are in the current moment.
@@SP-qi8ur I stopped being afraid of talking to strangers, especially women. I got 2 women's phone numbers just this week by making jokes and being myself. I'm working out and just bought a new car, and instead of being afraid, I'm excited for the future
Interesting... Elementary and the first year of high school was hell. When I started my sophomore year I was asked to join an emo hardcore metal band by the hottest metal chick at our school. Well after that I've been always the dude that everyone wants to meet . I'm just a douchebag tho . I kinda get off on ignoring chicks at work that want to meet me lmao. Update . Some random cute chick yesterday asked me if she can take a picture with me and she asked me for my.number so we been talking and she wants to go out
I usually say "As long as what people are saying about me behind my back is false, I won't care. Since I never look at what they are saying I never care"
I swear when I was a kid I had this confidence and mental freedom all figured out. Trauma and solitude really screws with your head. Trying to get back to dropping my own emotional baggage. I think I can do it because I’ve done it before, just a matter of time.
learn for free or very cheap NLP you can find books or courses look for Richard Bandler or Virginia Satir or Ross Jeffries read their books totally worht it the same info at other gurus wiil cost you thousands or tens of thousands of dollars THE SAME INFO
I pay attention to details constantly. I pick up on shit nobody sees. I dropped out of school and did the opposite of everyone else. Now I am killing it in business and happy to be moving forward every day! Great content
Even though there is probably a lot of people that miss the dating/pick up advice that RSD used to be focused on, I feel like this inner game type stuff is far more important in the long run. You need to fix fundamental issues before you can fix everything else, and by fixing the fundamentals you're much closer to fixing everything else anyway.
You are so right! By learning a technique to overcome your anxiety, you fixate your anxiety first and then try to overcome it with a technique. Where in reality it is way better to let go of that one thing that is causing the anxiety so you don’t need any technique at all - and it’s way more authentic and fun. 🔥🙌🏼
I think working on this stuff shows you how trivial it is to look for lines or scams to pick up women. You learn to fix what's genuinely off inside of you and heal that past trauma and you'll be absolutely golden when attracting the opposite sex. It's really that simple.
The product analogy (14:41) was a huge eye opening for me, finally I understand how to detach my self-worth from my actions. my actions are the way I market myself , NOT my real value.
For anyone wondering how they can get used to this mindset: Throw yourselves into highly uncomfortablr situations (maybe in places noone will ever see you again) and whenever you feel the anxiety kicking in, keep telling yourself what these awesome guys here try telling you over and over again. It will become a ,,passive" skill one day
I am really stucked. See me now in comparison with when I discovered this channel, you will be blown. Appreciated Though I still have a long mile to go.
Bro, I really love watching your videos you're helping me so much like I have a ton of insecurities too and I try to fight em...Finally, I am on the the good side of the internet
Owen picking at their “scandal” nonsense and evolution is awesome 😂 Julien hitting on triggers and perception at the end was on point. There’s a threshold someone’s awareness has to reach on this and few do, because reacting to triggers is reinforced almost everywhere. I’ve cut off real relationships for this. Stay centered, my friends.
Such a powerful concept. "I know Me better than you" 🙌 it all boils down to self-validation. And I agree about receiving the feedback and having the final say!
Yeah I’ve been living in a state of anxiety so it’s completely distorted how I look at ppl. This gave me ways to make sure I’m more aware of how I see ppl for who they are as well as myself. The distortions seem so real but it’s just our projections. If we are that powerful imagine what we would see if we expect the best of others instead of fear them
This video is amazing as a musician who is going to start preforming soon huge boost of confidence to know that im not such a big deal. Kind of ironic at the same time. "Your opinion of me holds no weight over my opinion of me because I know me better than you" brilliant!
I am suffering this anxiety from my teenage days still not found any solution what to do. Finally got your gem videos. Now understand the main problems. Promise to best version of myself. Thanks jullien from bottom of my heart.
The one thing that I wish you brushed up on was that alot of men project onto woman that they will be like their mothers, and overly care about the small details going on in the man's life. This is furthest from the truth, over the past year I thought I was incredibly close to this one woman. Like I was like dam this person knows everything about me and during some time of separation due to our jobs taking us away from each other. I met up with her after 6 months without seeing her, I was really disappointed to find out that how much I thought I meant to her was def not the way she thought of me. She forgot most of the things we did together in the past and was really obvious she remember most of the conversations we had in the past in detail. Woman are solipsistic, they have a incredibly hard time fully engaging themselves in other peoples lives. Woman are very in the moment and often treat you how they feel about you in that moment. So all in all i found that as interesting, smart and deep conversations that I can have with a woman, it ultimately wont mean anything, because all the really cares about is how I make her feel in the moment and that all these things that I thought had alot of meaning, really didn't. It doesn't make it wrong, but at the same time I have to make myself right, for expecting people to care, remember, or give as much as I do. You will be incredibly frustrated in life if you keep thinking you can control the way people think and take action bout you. Just live and let everything be the way the way they are and accept them. Much love brothers!
Very nice. I played this in the same room as my wife who constantly freezes actions because she's always self conscious. This was good teaching for myself of course too and the fact that I had to mention it was because I'm the main character. 😉
I realized me being a “people pleaser” and me always being the a idk idc neutral person was my insecurity of not being liked by people. N that my insecurity was from my ego of wanting to be liked by people. Tough to feel worthy without someone else’s validation but that’s just something I need to learn to love myself on.
Exactly…you have to remind yourself you are worthy! Trying to get validation from others could probably lead to yourself trying to hard or even not being yourself
@@floccinaucinihilipilificationn I went through a whole identity crisis because of this!!! It’s definitely something hard to change, but It’s something that has to be done I’m glad I’m not the only one
@@CasandraLeahhh it’s a slow process for sure but don’t worry, you got this! One step at a time and remember, time moves so fast that you or the other person won’t even remember specific moments a year or two from now
@@misskitty6710 I got sick of myself. tired of keeping myself hostage when nobody is forcing me too. I realize nothing matters everybody is somebody who is just like you. I got away from people who made me feel anxious or judged. I started going to the gym and watched videos on how to improve on conversational skills then practiced ( if u need sum good videos I gotchu). no kidding now I have been walking up to ppl downtown and interviewing them questions with a camera! its so possible to change your life! Understand you dont have much time in this life, and there will literally never be another soul that thinks like you, ppl need and should hear who you are and what you believe! the biggest thing that motivates me to love myself is so that I can cherish connections with the ppl I find through bettering myself. good luck to u much luv ✌🏼
1:15 seconds in and had to comment. Dropping life bars🤯 A Reddit post helped change my life explaining why we “Need to learn to get over ourselves”. Same advice from you and got 19mins left…this is the key😂😂
So glad that i recently found this channel. Somehow, just watching those vids without even thinking a lot about them, i got a whole lot more confident and take life much less seriously. It's not that hard after all. Still, way to go for me.
One of the very few self improvement videos on TH-cam that I've found to be genuine and so relatable to whom i am... Special mention to the shorts clip about producer type goals and consumer type goals where u explain to a guy, hit me in the head like a rock. Please keep up the excellent support!
Always love to see you guys together. You got me laid when I was graduating and now I am learning about stuff that actually matters from you, what a journey. You are like internet swag uncles for me.
Its interesting how you literaly get a flow of a good feeling when you flip from being worried that no one cares about me into understanding that strangers never will and never did… so freeing it brings an instant smile!😅 its like we want people to care about us and worry what they would think if they did, but likely they will only ever care for a second and the rest is history. I had this feeling of insane shame, when on vacation, I was swiming under water in a pool near a hotel, that wasnt even deep, I came up out of the water and started choking, cause I breath in a little bit of the water, everyone looked at me at the pool and in couple seconds I was fine, but I couldnt look at anyone, while in reality they prolly just felt relief that I was ok and then second later I was again just a stranger to them…. Its like I worried that these people would always conect me with a memory “the guy that almost drowned in a shallow pool”. It almost resonates with highschool nameshaming, even tho I believe I was never bullied.
I found your content very helpful and it gave me a lot of insight regarding where to look to solve my issues.I have been practicing some of your pieces of advice from other videos and it is changing my life for the better ,I feel that I am improving a lot since I found you guys. I must say that I wasn't aware that the source of my shyness and approach anxiety was related to childhood trauma ,I have memories from the past coming back and I'm able to identify and resolve those issues, deal and disown them ,the results are instant. Thanks a lot! You are playing a huge part in my self development and quest for happiness.forever grateful Julien !🤗
This is the perfect youtube recommendation ever!! I just got from a botched interview and I am so shitty in that moment like many dead air times, not looking at them directly, looking at side to side because im nervous... But the thing is they wont remember because they don't know me. Or rather they will remember because that's the most unprofessional behavior they've seen...
typically they don't, unless you're within their peripheral and you somehow drop the ball in front of them, the thing to remember here is the analogy they gave about the iphone creator's opinion meaning way more than a regular user's, even if they do draw their conclusion from that event they'll forget it, and if they don't its still a limited view of you, which makes their thoughts of you meaningless.
A lot of these things i have already known/practiced and trained myself to think with but its nice to have something to remind me, hey, you should go back to being smart, cuz you are smart, and definitely have the confidence and self reliance to do or obtain whatever the hell you want in life
The analogy of you as the product and the way you connect as your marketing, is essentially the same as balancing authenticity and relatability. Don't question the product of who you TRULY are, but do notice how the way you connect lands with others so you can calibrate your vibe in a way that resonates with them.
I love your videos, always give a massive value and I experience some sort of resistance, so it motivates me to do subconscious release as soon as the video ends. ty for changing lives for the better!
The best personal experience for me was back in highschool when my my facial hair started growing in an ugly way, I used to shave it before school and one day after I had shaved the right side, I realised that I’m late so I got stressed and just went to school with only one side of my face shaved. Guess what, nobody mentioned it and it really seemed like nobody even noticed it lmao
I am a girl and I decided to not wear make-up, I just didn't care. Then, when I went to uni, my friend asked me if I'm sick 😅😅 (I looked so without makeup) So, she actually noticed the change.
In AA they taught us "if you're scared to go to the bathroom in the middle of a meeting because you think everyone will stop and look at you when you get up, WHY ARE YOU SO SELF CENTERED? HOW SPECIAL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?"
My biggest takeaway from this is the fact that ego in itself isn’t terrible, but how you utilize it in life is going to determine whether or not you will feel free, or locked by the society’s view on urself. Im uncertain if I’m using Ego the right way; identity, right?
The biggest thing I learned is , “they’re not looking at me”. the social anxiety tells you they are probably looking at you etc when they are not and they are just living out their own lives.
This is awesome and I think hits to a bigger area of personal / spiritual / consciousness evolution . Presence and Mindfulness. And when one embodies Mindful Presence, somehow other people just Feel it, but at that point it doesn't matter if they do or not , because one is fully engaged as both observer and creator (via thoughts / emotions) of one's immediate present -moment state. Just imo .
I find that I used to not draw any attention, wearing very basic and sometimes dirty or wrinkly clothes, maybe it was noticed but nobody said anything. Now I go out in wildly stylish shirts, with shiny rings and necklaces, crazy shoes, all this unique flair. Everyone notices me and wants to talk to me. It's interesting. You can really draw attention that way, but the small details like a little hair or dust left on a t shirt will never be noticed.
Don’t listen to these guys, they can’t change YOU, the more you look up to people and seeing them as teachers the worse it will be, because you will compare yourself to them all the time. You will wake up when you want to wake up.
People are not fully aware of what really goes on. People are in there own world. Due to having insecurities we can’t do our best so focus on positive reinforcement. Our attention spans are getting shorter. We tend to be forgetful do mental exercise. Nobody sees you exactly as you are. Be careful of getting triggered.
Watching this video, everything makes sense. Listening to what you’re saying, it’s so obvious now. It’s like something that was right in front of my face, but I didn’t even see it. I don’t have crippling social anxiety, but I’m often in situations where I’m playing it cool on the outside but I’m having a major anxiety attack on the inside. It’s one of the reasons I have never tried stand up comedy which is something that I really want to do. My takeaway is that no one really gives a fuck…especially if you don’t. When you worry about something or try to cover something up, you are only drawing attention to the very thing you don’t want them to notice. If you are unbothered, they have no reason to draw their attention to the thing that you are worried about.
So I'm not at all like you are describing. I typically look at everyone in the room, or at least as many as I resonably can (obviously in a crowd of hundreds that's impossible, but I will look at the people closest). I look at people passing me on the street all the time. I study my own hands extensively. I look at stuff going on behind the main characters in films all the time. I constantly think of embarassing moments from decades past and cringe, then have to remind myself that was so long ago the people involved likely forget I exist anymore (but I remember them relatively clearly). What does that make me?
6:07 dude, I really hope you'll put the blueprint out there again. I got a crappy mp3 version. It's amazing, heard it in 2012 for the first time, listened to it recently again. Just what I needed.
The tips you guys give are so great because they’re win-win. I want to hookup with some of the women I’ll meet this weekend sure, but not trying to ruin anyone’s “movie” to do it
lots of men in here, no hate or anything, I'm just observing this social tendency in this event, interesting. very motivational content, lots of food for thought
My advise to people especially my kings, stop telling yourself not to go out and socialize whatever bad senecio is playing out in your mind it’s not gonna happen no one looks and judges you. Don’t care about people’s perception about who you are
I don’t totally agree on the not noticing details about other people. I do notice details like hairs coming out of ears or noses or holes in clothes etc
Spent over 10 years following these lads. The advice and guidance they've given for free have been substantial and much appreciated. I've been specifically following Julien and he has sustained a level of consistency that has been commendable. Love this guy
So true I’ve had a crotch hole before and I still sit with my legs spread out and most people don’t notice. I just got a haircut yesterday after 3 months and only two people noticed. Most people dgaf.
Lol I can’t believe I would see clips of y’all on cringe subreddits and all over the internet. Turns out y’all both have some amazing insights, and how to project your mental energy into speaking rather than thinking about yourself. Great work
Actually, I would ignore the advice of any of them, based on looks (and it happened from thumbnails). Then, I watched Julian because of the sweet girl on the thumbnail, then youtube auto-mode put this other guy talking. Both very cool and helpful. Point is, clothes/ presentation... are also communication or "energy" (or a barrier to it).
My problem isn't that I'm anxious or anything i just don't have anything to talk about Wich makes people think I'm awkward and shy when really I just don't have the words or care to give or receive validation of any kind . People conversing around me just looks and sounds like simlish.
Shadow work can be qwiit beneficial.. helped me to break away from duality.. which i think many others should realize and no matter the justifications and rationalizing we tell ourselves to believe we are in the right or good..... tho i don't believe i am a bad man.. well that doesn't make me a good one either.. how thankful i am to hold no one above or below me, judge no one... and believe if we're all made of matter, then we all matter.... not just talking about human race either... Although i know to many, to most i mean absolutely nothing. To someone i mean the world. . Tho we are all the lead roles or heroes in our own story... we are the villain in someone elses... empathy over apathy
Haha! I totally have a couple of pairs of jeans that have a hole in the crotch area that I still wear out and when gigging. It's probably from the friction when drumming gig after gig and I'm like... I'm okay with it till I can afford new jeans (rent is pricey in Ibiza and pandemics make income tricky! lol)... and yup, like not one person has made a comment or noticed the jean holes. If they noticed, they didn't say anything. At that stage, even if they are thinking or saying anything about it. I'm just doing me! Thanks for reinforcing my methods Juilen! Great content!
Reminds me of Queen Elizabeth the first. One of her courtiers was making her a big bow and as he did so he farted. He was very embarrassed and was not seen again for a few years. When he returned to the palace the Queen greeted him with: "it is so good to see you again Sir Tom, we had quite forgot the fart".
Honestly, there's times to be the main character and times to be the background. Your analysis of this lifestyle reminds me of how they filmed the recent mad max fury road. We didn't follow the main character exactly. We just saw the weight of this character through choices. Without him, no one would've survived the trip. But he was essentially a part of the full story.
That last bit at the end reminds me of a theatre course I took when I first went to college (about the only thing I remembered from this class). She went, if nothing else, remember that they are what you think they are if you let them and you are what they think you are if you let them. In other words, if you frame someone to be scary (as you mentioned) then they can take up that mantle. Also, if people think I'm the garbage disposal for food and I allow them to give me their candy, leftovers, etc then I am the garbage disposal. So it goes both ways, but you can change those frames, or allow them to happen.
I think about people, and look at tiny details all the time. I know my hands... Each freckle, or imperfection. I watch EVERYTHING. So saying that people don't pay attention is wrong. I make facial recognition of people in rooms or locations.. I look at all the little details. Which is why my anxiety is high.. I think, in the way, I think others think... But I'm pretty sure that's just my autism 😅
Can't you be simultaneously into yourself but also notice details and vibes of everyone around you (even passersby on the street)? I've always felt both tracks playing at the same time.
Comment your top takeaway from this video here below! I personally read through EVERY SINGLE COMMENT!!!
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@@aztecwarrior5702 Thanks!
Hey bro, what’s your watch? Love it! @julienHimself
Everyone is the main character in their own movie. Everyone thinks about themselves much more than others. No one cares. Everyone is self interested. Realize this and freedom is yours. People take things at face value. It's freeing because you realize no one's opinion about you actually matters or is true. Even your own opinion about yourself isnt hard-core fact and changes depending on your beliefs about yourself. You create your life and are 100% responsible for everything in your life.
Am I the only one who notices every single detail of others??😂😅
Auditing past interactions is a scary prospect. When someone confronts you and makes you both fear and rage it's hard to say the right thing. You manage not to beat the living shit out of them but feel shame afterwards that you did nothing. One time I had about 100 people all chanting at me in unison to get out, I was drowned out and lost for words. Someone with greater charisma than me got them all chanting. Yes I was the centre of attention on that occasion. Julien is doing a good job at convincing people that this never happens, I think the greater lesson is to have that happen and survive.
My biggest changes to my life came from focusing on lowering my social anxiety and accepting myself for my flaws. It's ok to want to become better and you should work to better yourself in body and in mind, but you have to be ok with being flawed. You will never be perfect, but strive to be better always and accept where you are in the current moment.
yessir nobodies perfect, accept flaws as normal and continue to improve
I concur👍
And what were the changes?
@@SP-qi8ur I stopped being afraid of talking to strangers, especially women. I got 2 women's phone numbers just this week by making jokes and being myself. I'm working out and just bought a new car, and instead of being afraid, I'm excited for the future
Very well said
A quote I heard young that stuck with me:
“I wouldn’t worry so much about what other people thought of me if I realized how rarely if ever they do”
Nice one! 👌
Interesting... Elementary and the first year of high school was hell. When I started my sophomore year I was asked to join an emo hardcore metal band by the hottest metal chick at our school. Well after that I've been always the dude that everyone wants to meet . I'm just a douchebag tho . I kinda get off on ignoring chicks at work that want to meet me lmao. Update . Some random cute chick yesterday asked me if she can take a picture with me and she asked me for my.number so we been talking and she wants to go out
I usually say "As long as what people are saying about me behind my back is false, I won't care. Since I never look at what they are saying I never care"
@@pedrosilvaproductions good point
man, your message it's WHAT I NEEDED!
I swear when I was a kid I had this confidence and mental freedom all figured out. Trauma and solitude really screws with your head. Trying to get back to dropping my own emotional baggage. I think I can do it because I’ve done it before, just a matter of time.
Let me know if you'd like my help with this: application.julienhimself.com
teenage years and your twenties are the most insecure years of your life, after 30 and before puberty is when ur the most free
learn for free or very cheap NLP you can find books or courses
look for Richard Bandler or Virginia Satir or Ross Jeffries read their books totally worht it
the same info at other gurus wiil cost you thousands or tens of thousands of dollars THE SAME INFO
@@antagonisf really after 30s???
I pay attention to details constantly. I pick up on shit nobody sees. I dropped out of school and did the opposite of everyone else. Now I am killing it in business and happy to be moving forward every day! Great content
Same here dude, at my job my nickname is “Full Disclosure Morri” since i include little details that most disregard lol
What was the point of this comment??
I guess pay attention to details. Don’t just read the headlines
@@edilsonmendez7399 Main character vibes
@@2770escobar2770 fuck yeah homie, underdog story
Even though there is probably a lot of people that miss the dating/pick up advice that RSD used to be focused on, I feel like this inner game type stuff is far more important in the long run. You need to fix fundamental issues before you can fix everything else, and by fixing the fundamentals you're much closer to fixing everything else anyway.
You are so right! By learning a technique to overcome your anxiety, you fixate your anxiety first and then try to overcome it with a technique. Where in reality it is way better to let go of that one thing that is causing the anxiety so you don’t need any technique at all - and it’s way more authentic and fun. 🔥🙌🏼
YES! 👌
I think working on this stuff shows you how trivial it is to look for lines or scams to pick up women. You learn to fix what's genuinely off inside of you and heal that past trauma and you'll be absolutely golden when attracting the opposite sex. It's really that simple.
@@350zKingz Exactly 👌🙂
Amen to that 100%
So far I’ve been more social and started to do and say what I think versus just staying in my head :)
I had a speaker say "people are waiting for you to get over yourself" , this takes that to a whole new level.
The product analogy (14:41) was a huge eye opening for me, finally I understand how to detach my self-worth from my actions. my actions are the way I market myself , NOT my real value.
For anyone wondering how they can get used to this mindset: Throw yourselves into highly uncomfortablr situations (maybe in places noone will ever see you again) and whenever you feel the anxiety kicking in, keep telling yourself what these awesome guys here try telling you over and over again.
It will become a ,,passive" skill one day
Been making me become a better person since the RSD days, you and Max were my biggest, most impactful teachers in life! Much love
Thank you for your longtime support! 🙏
I am really stucked. See me now in comparison with when I discovered this channel, you will be blown. Appreciated
Though I still have a long mile to go.
Bravo Luka!! Drago mi je da nasih ima ovdje.
Bro, I really love watching your videos you're helping me so much like I have a ton of insecurities too and I try to fight em...Finally, I am on the the good side of the internet
Owen picking at their “scandal” nonsense and evolution is awesome 😂
Julien hitting on triggers and perception at the end was on point. There’s a threshold someone’s awareness has to reach on this and few do, because reacting to triggers is reinforced almost everywhere.
I’ve cut off real relationships for this. Stay centered, my friends.
🙏🙏🙏
Facts👏
Such a powerful concept. "I know Me better than you" 🙌 it all boils down to self-validation. And I agree about receiving the feedback and having the final say!
Yeah I’ve been living in a state of anxiety so it’s completely distorted how I look at ppl. This gave me ways to make sure I’m more aware of how I see ppl for who they are as well as myself. The distortions seem so real but it’s just our projections. If we are that powerful imagine what we would see if we expect the best of others instead of fear them
This video is amazing as a musician who is going to start preforming soon huge boost of confidence to know that im not such a big deal. Kind of ironic at the same time. "Your opinion of me holds no weight over my opinion of me because I know me better than you" brilliant!
Yes! 🙏
I am suffering this anxiety from my teenage days still not found any solution what to do. Finally got your gem videos. Now understand the main problems. Promise to best version of myself. Thanks jullien from bottom of my heart.
Glad my videos have been helpful! Let me know if you'd like my help accelerating your progress with this: application.julienhimself.com/
Learn nlp thank me later
anxiety can be permanently fixed in about 5min to 1h if the neurolinguistic programming exercises are done right and fast
The one thing that I wish you brushed up on was that alot of men project onto woman that they will be like their mothers, and overly care about the small details going on in the man's life. This is furthest from the truth, over the past year I thought I was incredibly close to this one woman. Like I was like dam this person knows everything about me and during some time of separation due to our jobs taking us away from each other. I met up with her after 6 months without seeing her, I was really disappointed to find out that how much I thought I meant to her was def not the way she thought of me. She forgot most of the things we did together in the past and was really obvious she remember most of the conversations we had in the past in detail. Woman are solipsistic, they have a incredibly hard time fully engaging themselves in other peoples lives. Woman are very in the moment and often treat you how they feel about you in that moment. So all in all i found that as interesting, smart and deep conversations that I can have with a woman, it ultimately wont mean anything, because all the really cares about is how I make her feel in the moment and that all these things that I thought had alot of meaning, really didn't. It doesn't make it wrong, but at the same time I have to make myself right, for expecting people to care, remember, or give as much as I do. You will be incredibly frustrated in life if you keep thinking you can control the way people think and take action bout you. Just live and let everything be the way the way they are and accept them. Much love brothers!
Very nice. I played this in the same room as my wife who constantly freezes actions because she's always self conscious. This was good teaching for myself of course too and the fact that I had to mention it was because I'm the main character. 😉
Lol, glad this resonated and was helpful! 🙌
watching your videos everyday trying to implement your knowledge in my life, making changes progressively and improving, thank you so much Julien
Glad my videos resonate and are so helpful! 🙏🙏🙏
Same!
@@aptrevixle269 🔥🔥🔥
I realized me being a “people pleaser” and me always being the a idk idc neutral person was my insecurity of not being liked by people. N that my insecurity was from my ego of wanting to be liked by people. Tough to feel worthy without someone else’s validation but that’s just something I need to learn to love myself on.
Exactly…you have to remind yourself you are worthy! Trying to get validation from others could probably lead to yourself trying to hard or even not being yourself
@@floccinaucinihilipilificationn I went through a whole identity crisis because of this!!! It’s definitely something hard to change, but It’s something that has to be done I’m glad I’m not the only one
@@CasandraLeahhh it’s a slow process for sure but don’t worry, you got this! One step at a time and remember, time moves so fast that you or the other person won’t even remember specific moments a year or two from now
meeee if ur active still how did u change this?
@@misskitty6710 I got sick of myself. tired of keeping myself hostage when nobody is forcing me too. I realize nothing matters everybody is somebody who is just like you. I got away from people who made me feel anxious or judged. I started going to the gym and watched videos on how to improve on conversational skills then practiced ( if u need sum good videos I gotchu). no kidding now I have been walking up to ppl downtown and interviewing them questions with a camera! its so possible to change your life! Understand you dont have much time in this life, and there will literally never be another soul that thinks like you, ppl need and should hear who you are and what you believe! the biggest thing that motivates me to love myself is so that I can cherish connections with the ppl I find through bettering myself. good luck to u much luv ✌🏼
You have changed my entire life and ive only watched three videos. Thank you
Amazing to hear! Welcome to the channel! 🙏
1:15 seconds in and had to comment. Dropping life bars🤯 A Reddit post helped change my life explaining why we “Need to learn to get over ourselves”. Same advice from you and got 19mins left…this is the key😂😂
So glad that i recently found this channel. Somehow, just watching those vids without even thinking a lot about them, i got a whole lot more confident and take life much less seriously. It's not that hard after all. Still, way to go for me.
Amazing to hear! Welcome to the channel! 🙏
One of the very few self improvement videos on TH-cam that I've found to be genuine and so relatable to whom i am... Special mention to the shorts clip about producer type goals and consumer type goals where u explain to a guy, hit me in the head like a rock.
Please keep up the excellent support!
Thank you!! Glad this resonates! 🙏
Always love to see you guys together. You got me laid when I was graduating and now I am learning about stuff that actually matters from you, what a journey. You are like internet swag uncles for me.
W
This is why I stand out. Everyone thinks they’re the main character and I don’t even care about any of that
I also had the example of how it’s so easy to tell your everything to a complete stranger knowing that you’ll never see them again
yes sir! i have lived this! now when i enter a room and open my mouth i remove the air and there is a dead silence when i speak!
Its interesting how you literaly get a flow of a good feeling when you flip from being worried that no one cares about me into understanding that strangers never will and never did… so freeing it brings an instant smile!😅 its like we want people to care about us and worry what they would think if they did, but likely they will only ever care for a second and the rest is history. I had this feeling of insane shame, when on vacation, I was swiming under water in a pool near a hotel, that wasnt even deep, I came up out of the water and started choking, cause I breath in a little bit of the water, everyone looked at me at the pool and in couple seconds I was fine, but I couldnt look at anyone, while in reality they prolly just felt relief that I was ok and then second later I was again just a stranger to them…. Its like I worried that these people would always conect me with a memory “the guy that almost drowned in a shallow pool”. It almost resonates with highschool nameshaming, even tho I believe I was never bullied.
so true. ! now back to being introvert scared of public speaking heights and dark places - love you all
Let me know if you'd like my help overcoming this: application.julienhimself.com 🙏
I love to see guys fill up the room not just women.
If your improving people notice you less but feel you more...if you're projecting or protesting? You give the power back
Don't ever give the power back
I found your content very helpful and it gave me a lot of insight regarding where to look to solve my issues.I have been practicing some of your pieces of advice from other videos and it is changing my life for the better ,I feel that I am improving a lot since I found you guys.
I must say that I wasn't aware that the source of my shyness and approach anxiety was related to childhood trauma ,I have memories from the past coming back and I'm able to identify and resolve those issues, deal and disown them ,the results are instant.
Thanks a lot! You are playing a huge part in my self development and quest for happiness.forever grateful Julien !🤗
This is the perfect youtube recommendation ever!! I just got from a botched interview and I am so shitty in that moment like many dead air times, not looking at them directly, looking at side to side because im nervous... But the thing is they wont remember because they don't know me. Or rather they will remember because that's the most unprofessional behavior they've seen...
Welcome to the channel! 🙏
people absolutely do notice you, they compare themselves and try to find flaws to look down at you and feel better about themselves...
typically they don't, unless you're within their peripheral and you somehow drop the ball in front of them, the thing to remember here is the analogy they gave about the iphone creator's opinion meaning way more than a regular user's, even if they do draw their conclusion from that event they'll forget it, and if they don't its still a limited view of you, which makes their thoughts of you meaningless.
Ah this is so great. It’s gonna help so many folks.
🙏🙏🙏
A lot of these things i have already known/practiced and trained myself to think with but its nice to have something to remind me, hey, you should go back to being smart, cuz you are smart, and definitely have the confidence and self reliance to do or obtain whatever the hell you want in life
Glad this was a good reminder! 🙏
The analogy of you as the product and the way you connect as your marketing, is essentially the same as balancing authenticity and relatability.
Don't question the product of who you TRULY are, but do notice how the way you connect lands with others so you can calibrate your vibe in a way that resonates with them.
I love your videos, always give a massive value and I experience some sort of resistance, so it motivates me to do subconscious release as soon as the video ends.
ty for changing lives for the better!
Glad my videos are so helpful to you! 🙏
The best personal experience for me was back in highschool when my my facial hair started growing in an ugly way, I used to shave it before school and one day after I had shaved the right side, I realised that I’m late so I got stressed and just went to school with only one side of my face shaved. Guess what, nobody mentioned it and it really seemed like nobody even noticed it lmao
I am a girl and I decided to not wear make-up, I just didn't care. Then, when I went to uni, my friend asked me if I'm sick 😅😅 (I looked so without makeup) So, she actually noticed the change.
@@jay.jay. Men will still find you attractive even without make-up
In AA they taught us "if you're scared to go to the bathroom in the middle of a meeting because you think everyone will stop and look at you when you get up, WHY ARE YOU SO SELF CENTERED? HOW SPECIAL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?"
Helping my homies socialize has always helped my own results because I’m not thinking about myself.
I’d rather hear from just You 🙏🙏
My biggest takeaway from this is the fact that ego in itself isn’t terrible, but how you utilize it in life is going to determine whether or not you will feel free, or locked by the society’s view on urself.
Im uncertain if I’m using Ego the right way; identity, right?
Game changer! Thank you Julien!
Julien: “You’re not that big of a deal”
Me: *instantly turns off video*
Lol 😂
A lot if my social anxiety comes from my sisters constant critisizm. I'm 65.I don't associate with her 2 yrs and counting. Much better now!
Is weird how sometime your worst enemies is your own family or the friends u thought were real
The biggest thing I learned is , “they’re not looking at me”. the social anxiety tells you they are probably looking at you etc when they are not and they are just living out their own lives.
Great takeaway!
You changed my whole personality man🙏🙏🙏,love from india❤️❤️❤️
Amazing to hear!! What was your top takeaway from this video btw? 👊
This is awesome and I think hits to a bigger area of personal / spiritual / consciousness evolution . Presence and Mindfulness. And when one embodies Mindful Presence, somehow other people just Feel it, but at that point it doesn't matter if they do or not , because one is fully engaged as both observer and creator (via thoughts / emotions) of one's immediate present -moment state. Just imo .
I am grateful for your work.
I find that I used to not draw any attention, wearing very basic and sometimes dirty or wrinkly clothes, maybe it was noticed but nobody said anything. Now I go out in wildly stylish shirts, with shiny rings and necklaces, crazy shoes, all this unique flair. Everyone notices me and wants to talk to me. It's interesting. You can really draw attention that way, but the small details like a little hair or dust left on a t shirt will never be noticed.
I'm impressed by this Julien guy
Thank you! Glad this resonates! 🙏
The emotion and body code is incredibly helpful in releasing these emotions that hold you back.
Nice! 👌
Yo Julien brother... just wanted to let you know how much your content has helped me. Thanks man
So happy to hear that! You're very welcome! 🙏
Don’t listen to these guys, they can’t change YOU, the more you look up to people and seeing them as teachers the worse it will be, because you will compare yourself to them all the time. You will wake up when you want to wake up.
🤔
People are not fully aware of what really goes on. People are in there own world. Due to having insecurities we can’t do our best so focus on positive reinforcement. Our attention spans are getting shorter.
We tend to be forgetful do mental exercise. Nobody sees you exactly as you are. Be careful of getting triggered.
Man this is some life changing perspective.
Thank you! Glad this was helpful! 🙏
Important concepts here! -Owen
🔥🔥🔥
19:25 - julien was fully woke and definitely displaying "high consciousness" at that moment....👌
how about paying some royalties to those from whom you stole copyrighted technologies and concepts you piece of shit
NLP©®™ is the basis of all seduction community as tool of personal therapeutic change fast change
Richard Bandler started it a joke as flirting class for shy people women included in audience you can still find online I think those old video recordings
Bandler said so in his books and video courses
of course I won't get any answers from these thieves but don't think you your clients and people won't find your past thanks to internet and archives
Bandler and Grinder and Ross Jeffries should sue your asses in all american courts of law for breaching and stealing copyirghted materials
Watching this video, everything makes sense. Listening to what you’re saying, it’s so obvious now. It’s like something that was right in front of my face, but I didn’t even see it. I don’t have crippling social anxiety, but I’m often in situations where I’m playing it cool on the outside but I’m having a major anxiety attack on the inside. It’s one of the reasons I have never tried stand up comedy which is something that I really want to do.
My takeaway is that no one really gives a fuck…especially if you don’t. When you worry about something or try to cover something up, you are only drawing attention to the very thing you don’t want them to notice. If you are unbothered, they have no reason to draw their attention to the thing that you are worried about.
So I'm not at all like you are describing. I typically look at everyone in the room, or at least as many as I resonably can (obviously in a crowd of hundreds that's impossible, but I will look at the people closest). I look at people passing me on the street all the time. I study my own hands extensively. I look at stuff going on behind the main characters in films all the time. I constantly think of embarassing moments from decades past and cringe, then have to remind myself that was so long ago the people involved likely forget I exist anymore (but I remember them relatively clearly). What does that make me?
You’re me
6:07 dude, I really hope you'll put the blueprint out there again. I got a crappy mp3 version. It's amazing, heard it in 2012 for the first time, listened to it recently again. Just what I needed.
The tips you guys give are so great because they’re win-win. I want to hookup with some of the women I’ll meet this weekend sure, but not trying to ruin anyone’s “movie” to do it
This guy should teach at school. I seriously think this is something we should all learn before we are 15
lots of men in here, no hate or anything, I'm just observing this social tendency in this event, interesting. very motivational content, lots of food for thought
My advise to people especially my kings, stop telling yourself not to go out and socialize whatever bad senecio is playing out in your mind it’s not gonna happen no one looks and judges you. Don’t care about people’s perception about who you are
I don’t totally agree on the not noticing details about other people. I do notice details like hairs coming out of ears or noses or holes in clothes etc
I love the way his beard is like half red and half white, looks fucking dope
Everyday the human nature doesn't cease to amaze me
I do find myself wanting to tell ppl how young I am when they see the successful things I’m doing. Makes sense
This is all stuff I learned very early on & so early in fact, that a lot of this feels like old news. I pay attention to EVERYTHING.
Glad to hear this clicked early on for you! 🙌
Never felt so alive and I just love what hvc does to me. I feel so good haha, thank you so much Julien!!!
Amazing to hear!! High Vibe Communication is definitely a GAME CHANGER!
It's true everyone is going through the same experience
Spent over 10 years following these lads. The advice and guidance they've given for free have been substantial and much appreciated.
I've been specifically following Julien and he has sustained a level of consistency that has been commendable. Love this guy
Thank you! 🙏
U are describing Illusion of Transparency :)
Bro not even 30 fucking minutes ago I was staring so God damn intently at my hand for some reason wtf are the odds
So true I’ve had a crotch hole before and I still sit with my legs spread out and most people don’t notice. I just got a haircut yesterday after 3 months and only two people noticed. Most people dgaf.
I looked at my hands, im unstoppable now
Lol 🔥👊
Lol I can’t believe I would see clips of y’all on cringe subreddits and all over the internet. Turns out y’all both have some amazing insights, and how to project your mental energy into speaking rather than thinking about yourself.
Great work
There are people who naturally attract more attention
I cant believe that people are to this day paying 'coaches'
I have trouble "playing my instrument" because most people don't seem receptive. Like they'd rather watch Netflix
Actually, I would ignore the advice of any of them, based on looks (and it happened from thumbnails). Then, I watched Julian because of the sweet girl on the thumbnail, then youtube auto-mode put this other guy talking. Both very cool and helpful. Point is, clothes/ presentation... are also communication or "energy" (or a barrier to it).
I think I walked into the wrong class. I notice people from 50 feet away and examine what they're doing lmao
My problem isn't that I'm anxious or anything i just don't have anything to talk about Wich makes people think I'm awkward and shy when really I just don't have the words or care to give or receive validation of any kind . People conversing around me just looks and sounds like simlish.
Stumbled upon this right now. Needed it.
Glad this was helpful! Welcome to the channel! 🙏
Dat palm angels plaid shirt doe👀👌🏽🔥
🔥🔥🔥
Shadow work can be qwiit beneficial.. helped me to break away from duality.. which i think many others should realize and no matter the justifications and rationalizing we tell ourselves to believe we are in the right or good..... tho i don't believe i am a bad man.. well that doesn't make me a good one either.. how thankful i am to hold no one above or below me, judge no one... and believe if we're all made of matter, then we all matter.... not just talking about human race either...
Although i know to many, to most i mean absolutely nothing. To someone i mean the world. .
Tho we are all the lead roles or heroes in our own story... we are the villain in someone elses... empathy over apathy
Haha! I totally have a couple of pairs of jeans that have a hole in the crotch area that I still wear out and when gigging. It's probably from the friction when drumming gig after gig and I'm like...
I'm okay with it till I can afford new jeans (rent is pricey in Ibiza and pandemics make income tricky! lol)... and yup, like not one person has made a comment or noticed the jean holes. If they noticed, they didn't say anything.
At that stage, even if they are thinking or saying anything about it. I'm just doing me!
Thanks for reinforcing my methods Juilen! Great content!
You're very welcome! Glad this resonates!!
Reminds me of Queen Elizabeth the first. One of her courtiers was making her a big bow and as he did so he farted. He was very embarrassed and was not seen again for a few years.
When he returned to the palace the Queen greeted him with: "it is so good to see you again Sir Tom, we had quite forgot the fart".
18:50 I haven't figured out the answer to what triggered it initially. Any suggestions how to dive deeper there to figure it out?
Honestly, there's times to be the main character and times to be the background.
Your analysis of this lifestyle reminds me of how they filmed the recent mad max fury road.
We didn't follow the main character exactly. We just saw the weight of this character through choices. Without him, no one would've survived the trip. But he was essentially a part of the full story.
Genius talk, thank you, Julien and Owen!
You're very welcome!
That last bit at the end reminds me of a theatre course I took when I first went to college (about the only thing I remembered from this class). She went, if nothing else, remember that they are what you think they are if you let them and you are what they think you are if you let them. In other words, if you frame someone to be scary (as you mentioned) then they can take up that mantle. Also, if people think I'm the garbage disposal for food and I allow them to give me their candy, leftovers, etc then I am the garbage disposal. So it goes both ways, but you can change those frames, or allow them to happen.
Glad this resonated! 🙏
actually i think i would notice the holes, and those little details matter, especially with manners and reading people, dating etc
I think about people, and look at tiny details all the time. I know my hands... Each freckle, or imperfection. I watch EVERYTHING. So saying that people don't pay attention is wrong.
I make facial recognition of people in rooms or locations.. I look at all the little details. Which is why my anxiety is high..
I think, in the way, I think others think...
But I'm pretty sure that's just my autism 😅
Another captivating lecture
What about people that get harassed and bullied all the time someone is forcing them to be a part of their movie..
Can't you be simultaneously into yourself but also notice details and vibes of everyone around you (even passersby on the street)? I've always felt both tracks playing at the same time.
There are always exceptions, of course... But the majority of people don't do this. 👌
I do, and when i mention the little details to people they think i'm a weirdo