The Twilight Saga Did NOT Age Well
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 3 ส.ค. 2024
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━CHAPTERS━
00:00 Intro to Twilight
02:39 Twilight (2008)
14:23 New Moon (2009)
27:56 Eclipse (2010)
tags: #twilight #newmoon #eclipse
An Acceptably Unhinged Review of the Twilight Saga, Twilight (2008), New Moon (2009), and Eclipse (2010). Based on the books by Stephenie Meyer. These movies star Kristen Stewart as Bella Swan, Robert Pattinson as Edward Cullen, and Taylor Lautner as Jacob Black. Twilight is a classic film about vampires in Forks, Washington, idk why they were there don't ask me. And also there is a werewolf tribe and also Bella Swan and they all go goo goo ga ga over her and risk their lives protecting her there's like whole armies trying to get Bella and it's wild. I love the Twilight Saga. - ตลก
Fun fact: in middle school I was hissed at by a classmate who was a super fan of twilight. To this day, it is one of the most bizarre and frightening moments of my life.
sorry 😔
Sorry 😔 ×2
Sorry 😔 x 3
Sorry 😔 x4
Sorry 😔 x5
The idea that Bella doesn't have a shield and instead is just absolutely brain dead and that's why Edward can't read her mind is potentially the best take
LMAOOO
No thought head empty smooth brain bliss
I laughed so hard like imagine
I realised that just some seconds before gabi belle mentioned it. xD
Im writing a twilight parody fic and in it thats genuinely the reason, and Edward tells her that to her face
Never ask…
…a woman her age
…a man his salary
…Jasper what he was doing during the Civil War
…. Why the wolf wanted to mate with his true mate that was a fetus…
Not that I would but in the entirely hypothetical scenario where the world wasn’t shit and I wanted a kid who would grow into a person if someone wanted to date my kid and they were older (or if they wanted mine and theirs to date) I would make their death look like an accident (I know multiple ways not that I’m planning anything but just in case I meat someone truly unworthy of life like those two guys
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
that put their “thing” in their own baby two different people with different wives but for the same reason their wife wasn’t there and wasn’t having sex with them both died but one of them barely looked like it did, one of them was in a country that viewed woman as animals lesser than males it and the other was in New York or something I read it hen I was thirteen or something it was when I was young young the guy was obviously caught since the mom wasn’t even gone for long and he was a terrible actor it was obvious to everyone that he did it
@@avrie6668 I feel like making it look like an accident kinda takes away the point of it because then someone else will come and imprint on them and you're going to have to make it look like another accident and then another one and so on and so forth, where if you just make it look like you kill people who try and imprint on your children then they would probably not imprint on children and at the very least your children would no longer be getting imprinted on.
*Bella jumps* “would you still love me if I were a worm?” 🤣 I lost it!!
The problem isn't Kristen Stewart's facial expressions, it's the looong lingering camera shots of nothing but her facial expressions.
Deep.
Yeah she’s not the most natural in the role but the filming and script didn’t help her
Also.... her shaking the non ketchup out or the bottle on her veg burger 😂Ohh, and the invisible man driving the tractor trailer when Bella firsts comes to Forks 👌🏻
Just saying
yeah the problem isn't at all the only emotion she can manage is constipated...
reality is she sucked as much as the lingering shots making it even worse
Lmfaooo
My teacher once said that Twilight is a story about a girl choosing between necrophilia or zoophilia
Fax
Basically 😂
Don't forget really inappropriate age gaps. Like mother, like daughter 😊
@@lulufan100 definitely. Sugar baby but with a MAJOR gap.
😂😂😂😂
I’m Brazilian, the whole Rio de Janeiro thing was because Brazil had one of the biggest twilight fanbases in the world and so they wanted to please us. But then they did the most random and absurd depiction of Brazil with them coming out of the plane and there being people dancing samba out of nowhere, and the indigenous Brazilians depiction were so offensive too lol
Thats not why, not many people know this but there is a collective of extremely powerful vampires in brazil who weren't happy with stephanie and told her to do something to appease them or they would send people after her. She's only talked about it vaguely once or twice in some super obscure places because she was never supposed to say anything so hardly anyone even knows unless they're someone who knows about the collective already and knows how pissed they were about the whole sparkly thing. I can't say much more or ill get in trouble from my family but yeah its the true story about that situation.
Well Stephanie is Mormon and that religion is inherently racist af
@@GHMYahooka you okay ?
@@GHMYahooka you know too much...
“Loud, weird guitar music” is a really good way to describe Muse lol
I remember reading someone saying online that Charlie’s POV would just be a horror story.
I would be a lot more team Charlie if he hadn't let his daughter marry into what would appear to any parent as some weird cult.
I would love to read that actually
@@user-wi9hv2pb2q she's 18 when they get married, he literally cannot stop her from doing anything lol
I suppose the real demarcation between RicknMorty and Galaxy of Terror is the presence of blatant irony. So all it takes to provide Charlie some zen calm is to provide him 4th wall-breaking awareness that he has materialized into Sealab 2021 for adolescents in Bill Gate's backyard.
They should split the difference and script the Charlie POV like a Sucker Punch take on Evil Dead 2 and Army of Darkness tropes, showcasing Charlie's secret fantasies of defying the original script by going full on Bruce Campbell to solve all his annoyances. Boomsticks, diesel punk prosthetic chainsaws, and Rob Zombie toasting the musical interludes with excerpts from the necronomicon. Who's up for crowd funding? 🤪
there’s a video from a youtuber called amanda todhunter (i think that’s her name) where she actually did that, it kinda does sound like a horror story 😭
tbh everyone being into bella was the most believable part of the movie. as a certified small town gal, as soon as a new kid rolls in everyone is chomping at the bit
I remember going to visit my grandparents, who lived in a small town (a couple thousand people) & even as a skinny, 17 year old guy, it was a lot like that. I had to be warned off from going to a party in the mountains, as several dudes wanted to kick my ass cause all the girls were talking about me. I never did anything with any of them. In fact, I don’t think I ever even hung out with a girl where we were alone. So this aspect of Bella’s experience did ring true to me.
Champing
It would have been interesting if she were a Siren or a Succubus that would make sense as to why all the guys are into her. But why does no one bother to bring up that the kid who almost ran over her committed sexual assault by kissing her on the cheek without permission? Just curious lol
@@prosperity4444both are correct.
@@maloryj7165 both are correct as in because of so much incorrect usage that irregardless has become correct also. Its a malapropism.
She's literally a Mary Sue. Stephenie Meyer has as much as admitted this is her personal romantic fantasy, and so Bella is her authorial drop in character.
That makes me laugh cause that’s like her admitting she has no personality other than being a simp, a loser and spineless af.I hate Bella, she’s the worst main character ever
Yeah, since Bella has barely any flaws/lack of beauty
The distorted Twlight piano always makes me laugh whenever it plays 😂😂
petition for Gabi to write, direct, and star in a Charlie Swan spin-off
Yes!
omg yesssss
✍🏻
only if she does a back eyed sneeze angle where she traps chuck in the closet with the 'typhoon balloon' and forces his hand through marriage.
I didn't know that I needed that until I watched this video!
The most unbelievable part of the Cullen’s cover story, in my opinion, is that the whole town would buy that Carlisle, a man in his EARLY 20s would willingly adopt 5 teenagers.
I wouldn't willingly talk to five teenagers, let alone adopt them.
Or that he was a doctor in his early 20s ("The most common route to becoming a physician involves completing a bachelor's degree, followed by medical school, and then 3 years or more in a residency program for a medical specialty. At the very least, the entire process can take 11 years, putting the average age for a beginning doctor at 29 or 30.")
Or that Edward was 100+- yrs old, is hot for Bella but wants to wait until hes married to have sex but hasnt been married over the past 100 yrs. Or hes okay with sex outside of marriage except for Bella for some reason.
And none of them where from a third world country.
Well his physical age was 23, but it was never said in the movies and I really doubt that they would go out and say Carlisle was 23. When I looked at him in the first movie I thought he looked really young, but like in his 30s. They would never go around and say he's 23. Especially when in the I think second movie Edward literally is like. "And Carlisle starts to look to young for the age he should be" which, at least for me, is a big clue that they never said, well, yeah he's 23 and has like 5 adoptive children and a wife
Carlisles age was an easy fix. Instead of saying everyone was adopted they could have said that Carlisle came from a big family and sometimes his brothers and sisters live with him. Maybe his brothers and sisters were adopted instead of Carlisle being the one who adopted them.
20:04 “have you flossed today “
Okay that really took me out lmao
I was just flossing at that moment😂
Ohh thank you, I misheard it as "Have you flopped today?" and was thinking damnn savage
My first thought if I was Bella and this dude who is super cold, doesn’t go out in the sun, and looks lowkey dead would’ve been “Oh he’s anemic! Get urself some vitamin gummies bro!”
Growing up means realizing that Charlie is the most desirable bachelor in the Twilight series.
100%
Also the least problematic hypothetical interest for bella.
I was always Team Charlie and I never understood how people could like Edward - or Jacob after the second book. And Bella was the worst. 😶
Yeah and carlisle
Yeah, he said it himself in the movies, around Bella's wedding. He's a ladies man
The reason Bella does dangerous stuff in New Moon is so she can see Edward’s force ghost thing. She thinks it’s Edward using some vampy power so when they reunite she asks him about it and he’s like “what tf are you talking about?”. Turns out it was Bella’s hallucination the whole time and nobody took the girly to therapy???
It’s called grief hallucinations, happens to ppl who are heart broken after a recent loss
@@Userislame098that's definitely a thing, but the way it's portrayed in the movie is absolutely horrible.
This baby is crazy😂😂😂
It is so sad that she is so addicted to Edward that she basically risks her life only to see his „ghost“
@@paulas7414THIS ONE. she is so addicted and attached to him, it physically and mentally puts her into danger
I love how inevitably everyone becomes Team Charlie.
Fun fact: It is canon in the Twilight universe that you can't be dark-skinned and a vampire, in the books it's claimed that the vampire venom would destroy all melanin in the body, while conveniently forgetting that would also affect eye and hair color. So Meyer was just doing it so she could write out all POC from her books.
but what about that one guy in the black eyed peas 😭😭
Vampires aren’t human so i honestly don’t see the problem. I think it sounds like a good reason.
@@bituinl It’s actually a terrible reason lmao it would have made more sense to just not address it and move on. If you’re gonna bring real world science into fantasy bullshit at least follow your own rules.
@@lonelyfroggy5787 yeah at the rules was they loose Melanie. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
@@bituinl Why does Edward and other Cullens have brunette hair or brown eyes in the book then? The point is that the rule is ONLY used to write out POC. It's a bullshit reason Meyers wrote in after the fact to make herself not look exclusive.
Funny story, I was in jail in 2008 for 60 days due to retail theft to support my addiction. And had my parents send me 2 of these books in the mail to read. I asked for some vampire books because I was into Anne Rice at the time. This is what they sent. Dude, after reading them, and talking them up as a 18 year old, I had half the fuckin jail block talking about Bella and Edward. As these "bad ass vampires and werewolves" hahah. Sold them for 5 honeybuns (typical currency in jail) to a guy as I was getting out the next day. I like to think the fandom never ended within the jail block and to this day, 15 years later, people are still passing my Twilight books around hahah. Nowadays, I wonder how I wasn't bullied over it. But, probably because I was the youngest in the block and most the old timers took to youngins.
+
Shit jail for 60 is rough. Had an uncle do 45(yrs) in the fed and he still to this day says the month In county waiting to go was the worst part of it
@@bcc5701 Jail sucks, that's for sure. My county's jail has a facility where you go once sentenced though, and it's much "better" than the branch jail where you go when arrested. But yeah, I did 60 days, 45 days, 30 days twice. Almost died twice from spinal infection and blood infection. Had IV antibiotics for 6 months, had to carry them around in a pack with a PICC line to my heart. Shit was wild. I'd still rather do jail than prison. Just because prison is prison. No gangs in jail. Mostly just people riding out their fairly short sentences. Glad I've been done with that bullshit for over a decade and clean like 6 years and some months
This is the best thing I ever read
This story delights me so hard
Fun fact, I met my fiancé because we both noticed the continuity error of the weird looking taxidermied armadillo in the biology class scene (you can see it @3:10) which disappears and reappears between shots and thought it was the best part of the movie. He made a Facebook fan page about it, I found it, and we became pen pals (he is Italian and I was studying Italian at the time) and eventually met in person after years of online friendship. We will be getting married next year and joke about going to Forks as part of our honeymoon and somehow incorporating armadillos into our ceremony.
THAT IS SO CUTE I WISH YALL THE BEST 😭😭😭
@@maroulakii Thank you!! His visa interview is this week, it's the final step and I can't believe we're so close to finally living together
I rarely post comments or answers, but your comment was so extraordinary I couldn’t just go on. It’s so funny and sweet! Congratulations, I hope all will go well for you two 😊 I hope you’ll be able to go to Forks, where it all started 😁
@@Sol-lf6em Thank you so much for reading our story and for the well wishes! His visa interview was today. When they asked him how we met, he didn't mention the armadillo specifically 😆but they still told him on the spot that he got the visa!!
Really a better love story than Twilight 😂
There are so many problems with twilight but Jasper being a confederate was WILD
Ok but the Black Eyed Peas sequenzes and Bella's nighmare-screaming had me on the floor😭
I just laugh thinking on that one fanon theory, that Stephine realized that she made Jacob such a nice guy in the second book, she had to retroactively make him worse from there on out to support her OTP and make Edward the lesser of two evils
I believe this wholeheartedly. Jacob was objectively the better choice for Bella in New Moon, so Stephanie had to assassinate his character and make him the literal worst so that anyone would root for team Edward.
funny as it would be that's not true 😂
Stephanie originally wrote breaking dawn first so the first version of Jacob was the one we got by the very end. (still imprinting on bella's baby, but they didn't have the strong friendship to tie them)
And then he falls in love with their demonspawn
@@raveng8217 Okay, bit of a rant here, but here we go.
I've literally seen other authors do this when they write love triangles. There will be two love interests, one of them being a genuinely kind and decent person, and the other one being downright terrible if not straight-up abusive to the protagonist.
The former can logically be deemed the "better option," but because the author wants the protagonist to be with the bad boy, they resort to character assassination for the other boy just to make him seem worse. All to make the protagonist seem justified in being with someone who is already pretty abhorrent.
I once saw this trope being done for a book that involved a protagonist willfully cheating on her husband, a man who actually loved and cared for her, with a man who had kidnapped, manipulated and abused her. But to make it seem okay, the author made the husband turn into a horrible person so that mister kidnapper here could kill him off, and protagonist could be with the "alpha male bad boy" just as the author intended.
This is a trope that actually kind of infuriates me, because I can just tell why authors do this. It becomes a matter of a protagonist falling for the bad boy not because they have a well-informed reason to, but because the story itself wants them to.
@@eliesh3833this is such a common trope in Asian dramas too, they make the second female or male leads absolute evil psychopaths to justify the main couple.
Just putting it out there … Stephanie Myers was a big Mormon celebrity, and this movie sage is literally just repressed Mormon sexuality turned up to a 10. Makes the whole “we have to be married first” thing make a lot more sense.
finally someone else points this out
YES
I didn't know that😳😳
But why is it dangerous 😭
Plus the whole “carry this baby even though you are literally dying”
“People killing, people dying”
(victoria while remembering james)
Hahaha the runescape music playing when she says "I can't dance." This is a prime example of why I love your videos.
Even though you could argue that New Moon is the worst movie, the depression sequence might be the best directed scene in the entire franchise.
It encapsulated how depression feels which is why I like it
pride and prejudice does it better and did it first lol
And also the song was a perfect match for it
I have to skip new moon every time I re-watch (which is a lot, its one of my special interests) because it will trigger a depressive episode every time lol
@@AutisticAsexual I also skip New Moon every rewatch, not just because of depression but Jacobs presence in that movie makes me uncomfortable and I can't sit through it.
One thing that always bothered me: if Jasper is so damn unstable and dangerous, why do they let him go to school? There's no telling what random thing might happen to set him off, and then the school is all dead.
i know!!
No bc the fact that in the first film Jasper is basically the newest addition to the family and they are letting him go to a whole ass school with humans and their blood LITERALLY EVERYWHERE. How did he not try to attack anyone but Bella had a small ass paper cut in New Moon and he lost his shit 😭😭
Honestly, they'd be more bothered by having to move than the bloodbath.
I like to think that he’s fine with other people and their blood but Bella is extra stinky as per movie one
@@luisrtorres513A school fulla students on their period 😭
Robert Patterson also voices the Heron in the English dub of The Boy and The Heron, and now I can't help but imagine Edward with the Heron's voice, and the Heron with Edward's voice
i cAN NOT believe you’d call supermassive black hole by muse some random “weird guitar music” lmao the music (and that leg thing alice does) are the only things that made that whole scene “iconic” 😅
Charlie is not just a dilf. He is THE DILF. He is respectful, kind, and somehow was able to live with Bella without going insane, and he's hot.
He is hot.
He is also kinda brainmushed which makes it all the better ❤
😮😅, but I respectfully disagree! But he is a great dad!
Eh... he also praised a dude for sexually assaulting his daughter, and then made a joke about how he might have to arrest her for punching the guy.
But to be fair, I blame that on the author, not the character. Because that felt extremely out of character for Charlie, to me. I think he would have absolutely lost his freaking mind if a guy kissed his daughter against her will and she had to use physical force to get him to stop. Bullets would be flying.
Fun Fact: It didn’t age poorly. You’re older now and realize how bad it was. Lol.
it got too much hate tho, just because so many teen girls liked it :(
@@sallijunttila3006 at the time it came out it got hate because teenage girls liked it, now it gets hate because we are all realizing its just bad lol
@@princembat okay fairr, but there's still SOME redeemable qualities lol I'm just sad it came out right as my "not like other girls" phase was at its peak and I know I would've eaten it uppp :'D
@@sallijunttila3006haha?
@@sallijunttila3006 Yep. Like, sure, there are definitely some questionable elements like imprinting. But meanwhile, Ernest Cline wrote an entire book whose plot was "What if an obsessive knowledge of the male parts of 80s pop culture was exactly what was needed to save the world, and girls went out with me for it", and everyone gave him a pass because it was wish fulfillment... for boys
"Would you still love me if I was a worm?" I choked, that almost killed me.
26:17 Can we just appreciate how CASUAL Alice is saying "Oh yeah, this is the perfect setting for my brother to expose himself in a way that'll get him killed by the vampire Italian Mafia!" like I'm astounded she isn't more concerned in this scene but seems to be concerned seconds later. What changed to make her actually care?
Also, are we getting a Breaking Dawn video?
I feel so bad for the actors, bad script, bad directing, bad work environment. Thank god Batman got out of there lol
true, but in the end those movies started their careers so 🤷😅
@kskwkowkqmwmosowowb yaaaaas
hooray for cedric diggory
Was it the porpoise meat?
@@surejan-ml1gs I agree with that for the most part, but you can't deny the physical toll it took on the actors. The pressure to look a certain way has done lifelong damage. Twilight is also the first of its kind, no movies of that type had gotten that big. Twilight was and is a cultural cornorstone, for better or worse.
I was firmly team Alice. I seriously believe Alice is the only one who doesn't have a toxic relationship with Bella...Plus she is way better lookin that Edward or Jacob, and well who said she had to pick a boy?😅
I was team Rosalie
You sir are a genius! 😂
Same 😂
Came here look for a comment like this ✨️
Team Alice 👏
Also, I just noticed…. I can’t think of a series like this for the generations after us. Twilight was literally the beginning of my tween-hood. I’m pretty sure it was one of the first times I was able to go see a premiere of a movie AT NIGHT with my friends in middle school.
Her as bellas dad Charlie is the best thing about this video 😂..
I always cracked up laughing watching it.. (while in the break room at work.totally worth it)
the repeated “the day in the life of Charlie Swan” bit had me DYING. Something about the pic of gabi dressed as Charlie sliding across the screen was so funny to me 😭
I was literally on the floor laughing. amazing.
Fun fact: the author of twilight tried to go out with my uncle in high school and my whole family thought she was crazy. There’s a character in twilight who looks just like him too!
Which one
Sir, you still have a little tea left in your cup to spill.
Bro finish telling the tea
Considering she's a die-hard mormon I'm not surprised she was crazy
I want the rest of this story
I am begging you to make "A Day in the Life of Charlie Swan" a permanent fixture on your channel I was CRYING from laughing so hard.
The microphone you hold as the dad looks like you're holding a flashlight which makes it all the more funny.
a dark comedy about charlies life would be genuinely amazing to watch
It should be called "It's Never Sunny In Forks"
I'm having an existential crisis on how much of an anime Twilight actually is
btw, I would watch a twilight anime lol
Indeed, however, Bella's too old! In a proper anime adaption she'd be no more than 14 years old.
@@sarafelix5081 Well, not really Twilight like fully. There is a good manga / anime about a teen getting involved with vampires. The main vampire having a conflict with a werewolf because of the human teen, and another vampire character who may actually be gay for the human teen, lowkey yandere. The only problem I see that you may not like, is its about guys. No actual romance, at least not yet in the manga. But heavy hints of bromance.
@@tsubakiofmelancholy6297 Drop the name!
@@sloppytightbottom Josei or otome isekai then. We're keeping the age though.
They absolutely missed the amazing opportunity to give Jasper a real intense southern accent 😂
I'm guessing the guy who played him isn't great at accents.
insert steve martin as orin in little shop of horrors here
He had an accent sometimes.
As an ExMormon currently in therapy, a lot of the problematic and or "quirky" things about twilight are explained by the writer Stephanie Meyer, being Mormon. ( Really hope she's ExMormon, but IDK) And while I don't think she intentionally wrote that into the book (in fact she probably tried to keep a lot of that out, but like herpes it always keeps coming back), there's so much that is analogous to being raised in the cult.
Where did you get that from? I’m a Mormon too and in no way do they condone creeps. Unless you’re talking FLDS.
@@deztheray8935all cults have creeps.
the herpes analogy is so random but it makes sense lmaoo
@@deztheray8935
Mormons don't condone creeps? I'm sorry, but the whole religion was founded on massive "creeps", to put it lightly. Maybe it's just because you're still a Mormon? I know that they like to censor the history and current state of the church.
@@deztheray8935 Kind of seems like they do.
Honestly Kirsten Stewart was the perfect actor for the role.
She does an extremely convincing job of portraying somebody with absolutely no personality.
Really hard to read someone's thoughts when they don't have any.
@@hotmilo lol Very true, I imagine it would just sound like TV static.
... Fk, I just realised I'm so old TV static doesn't even exist anymore. Trust me, It's a great joke!
@@MeCooper 😹
It's surprising how many people listen to static to help them fall asleep. Probably why dads usually fall asleep in the couch in older movies.
@@hotmilo lmfao My god that was savage! 11/10
omg yes
i will say, one of the reasons bella swan is so head empty is because she’s depressed as hell, and she only likes edward for the thrill. i know most people understandably don’t like new moon, but i watched it fresh after leaving my abusive ex, and i was like “damn okay, yeah, don’t be like bella.” so bad movie, good warning sign i guess lol
I remember that theme being a lot more clear in the books.
@@kdog8658 That's the problem though. The movie has to stand on it's own.
It's ironic that Bella acted more alive in the final movie than any of the other ones considering she is technically dead in it.
i was cry laughing the whole time, your editing kills me
22:39
This was a literal character suicide performed by Stephenie Meyer. She saw that Twilight fans favored Jacob over Edward, so she put this scene to be like "See, Jacob's a piece of sh**, now love Edward! He would never do that to Bella!".
Exactly. I’m convinced Jacob in New Moon was the equivalent of a celebrity dating PR stunt to get people talking, draw in curious people who wanted to be a part of the chatter, and then SM went back to her original plan with a way larger fan base.
50 Shades of Gray Skeletor Meme: "Joke's on you, I'm into that s***."
I mean. If you know Mormons. Then Yeeeeeeah
No seriously! As if she didn’t set up the love triangle. She’s such a bad writer, I’m kinda angry how her novel got so popular but better novels got slept on.
“ be normal, be normal be normal be normal be normal…. Nailed it” made me spit my water out
You are a gift to TH-cam
Girl Idk how or why I found this video all this time later, but I am so glad that I clicked it this morning 😂 Loving A Day in the Life of Charlie Swan 😂😂😂
Me too😅
@@HappyCabezonFish-je4tk him in the fridge with Bella's screams in the background... 💀💀💀😂
this video is so funny. the messed up music is making me pee my pants. yes bella googled "is my crush a vampire" LOLOLOL
I can’t decide, who has the quote of the century: Bella or Anakin
“I don’t like the rain. Any… cold… wet thing, I don’t really…”
“I don’t like sand. It’s coarse, rough, and irritating… And it gets everywhere.”
There are still 76 years left.
@jorenvanderark3567 oh god I don't want to be in my 90s at the end of the century. Oh god no no no no no PLEASE NO AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
@@SylvainJoseGautier- I'd be 102. So it'd be a blessing I guess lmao.
I mean, at least Anakin’s is a complete sentence.
To be fair, Inuyasha was asleep for 50 years and he was very immature and uncouth. Their relationship took quite a long time to develop over the series, plus they didn’t do much other than kiss once or twice, and then they were separated until after she turned 18. I think it was very tastefully done personally.
Bella’s brain is just the mii channel theme 24/7 and Edward cannot figure out why. This is canon now and no one can tell me otherwise
Do u know her channel got terminated
The music at 1:44 almost made me choke my salad, WHY IS IT SO FUNNY
I think probably the number one issue with the movies is that in the process of cutting down things from the books to make it fit into a digestible movie, they cut things that were actually pretty important to understanding parts of the movie.
don’t worry, in the books (i read all of them 😅) bella literally thinks nothing but “he’s so pretty”
"hes sparkly" 😍
Also in the cafeteria scene she goes like ‘they have such weird names’ when looking at them and Edward is having a mini-breakdown bc she’s staring at him and he can't read what she thinks. He’s brooding and all. And she’s like ‘lame names but they are kinda hot’ which is the least concerning thought anybody could have. It's one of my favourite little things fr
Bella wasn't having nightmares because Edward dumped her, she was having nightmares because a vampire tortured her and then bit her literally a month or two before Edward left
Thank you! I was looking for a comment about it because I had totally forgotten about it and seeing it brought up in the video made me do a double take XD
Thank you
I said the same thing in another comment
She almost died and is traumatized
I got no clue how I'd never figured that out before! You're a genius!🤯
Was that from the movie or books? I don't remember
@@cantdecideausername8584 both
Ok, I know i'm late here, but I just wanted to let you know Gabi, that at 4:45 your editing and reference made me burst out laughing at 1 am. It's soooo good! chef's kiss. Thank you for this gem. And this video!
1:56 the way he just ZOOMS out there😭😭
As a brazilian, I'm 1000% sure that they only made the Cullens go to Brazil to appeal to brazilian fans, which WORKED cause we were all bragging about it online 😂 but it makes ZERO sense bc the weather in Rio is sunny and hot af and they would sparkle all the time 😂😂😂😂
I always just assumed that it was because the Cullens' friends are from Brazil but all the other theories are so much more funny
😭
They could have appealed to anybody from anywhere so why Brazil?
@@bleeka325 brazilians get Crazy when someone talks about brazil, like, wildly crazy
@@bleeka325You clearly haven't seen a Brazilian seeing Brazil mentioned in any sort of media, positively or negatively, and how vocal they get about it. I see it as a marketing strategy
Your "day in the life of Charlie Swan" with Bella's screams in the background made me laugh so hard that I physically fell over while trying to do dishes, holy shit
i don't believe you
I absolutely love how you carry the mic even in the skits
Love these videos so much i come back to watch it now and then. Thank you for the amazing content.
After years, I still can’t wrap my head around how Jasper went to an all-human high school, yet couldn’t contain himself around one human. (Bella)
Because she just “smells so good”
I think it’s more of the self insert character thing and being “different” than other girls
Compartmentalization, really. It's like how stuff that's normal at work can put you off at home
So it's explained better in the book!
Jasper's power is not only to influence other people's emotions, but he also can feel the emotions of people around him. So in the scene when he's freaking out, he's surrounded in a room of vampires that are all thirsting after Bella's finger cut (reminder that canonically Bella has some weird thing where her blood is super tasty because of course she does). Now individually they all can control their thirst, but Jasper is feeling the thirst of seven vampires at once.
Normally at school, there's so many human kids and the Cullens go to school fed on animal blood so he doesn't struggle with thirst there.
Hope that helps
Bella only "smells super good" to Edward. Not the other vampires. But, yeah...
Charlie is *truly* the MVP of this entire series. Poor guy deserves several million dollars from the Cullens for emotional damage.
Maybe for himself. His daughter has no thoughts or emotion.
Just found your channel. Was an avid twilight worshiper in 2008. This video is killing omg well done.
"you fucking stink, take a shower"
"would you still love me if i was a worm?"
Well damn, Edward.
Happy to report that Team Charlie is still alive and well in gen z! In February the actor who played Charlie came to visit a teen theater group I was part of and literally everyone was freaking out like "omg it's Charlie he's literally the best character and he's soo hot holy shit!" I'm not kidding
I love this. I'm 32, and as a teenager when these movies were out I felt like I was the only one who was team Charlie.
@@Aster_Risk now that I'm in my 30s, I'm team charlie lol
@@Aster_Risk32 as well. You weren't alone
I'm 26, team charlie all the way ❤
Charlie congratulated Jacob for sexually assaulting Bella and breaking her hand in the process. He’s a cop. If that is how he treats his own daughter, how do you think the other victims of crime were treated?
Oof... I forgot about the congratulations, yiiikes 😨
He was probably ecstatic that someone else would possibly look after his screaming daughter, that once spent 6 months staring at pigeons because she was depressed that a man so old he probably spooges cobwebs, ghosted her.
That's a lot for someone employed full time to take.
@ElizabethWebb-zc3cpi think its like a motorcycle scene if that helps your memory but im not sure either
@@Naptosis "thank you for assaulting my daughter, now I can get some sleep" would be a batshit take for a dad to have
@@mulethedonkey2579 To be fair to him, that's probably the right thing to say/think if you're talking to an immortal, telepathic, vampire, that hasn't already made a 'bonus hole' in yours & your daughter's coconuts to get at the delicious strawberry milk inside.
Though I may be being anachronistic; I don't know if her dad knew at this point (or ever found out) that Eddie the Ego is a vamp.
Great edits again! You really are a gem! 💖
The scene of her in front of the window month by month by month was so much sadder to me in the book. It made me cry.
For one of the movies, McDonalds had this big promotional thing where the packaging had peel off stickers that were like a sweepstakes? And the bags and signage were plastered with the question 'team edward or team jacob' and I vividly remember an old man at a McDonald's saying "edward? Jacob? Who are they and why should I even care? Can I be team leave me the f*ck alone?". The most surreal part was I was half asleep, waiting alone at the table wearing a fancy dress my mom had me change into because we were on the way to see the Seattle Ballets production of the Nutcracker my mom won tickets to in an essay contest. Oh, and the McDonalds was in the woods.
McDonald in the woods seems fake
@@conifer27 Not in the seattle area lol it was right off the road
this sounds like a dream i would have that makes complete sense to me until i wake up and am like "wtf was that?"
people are so hostile to things marketed towards young girls smdh
Each sentence of this made it even funnier
One thing I genuinely appreciated about the series was how each movie had different directors with vastly different styles. It kept things fresh in my opinion.
Wait .. each movie had a different director!? Why am I just now learning this
fr the titles all had distinct aesthetics like u could identify which movie it was based on the filter
@@soymikleofr, imo the colors/directing style of the first movie wouldn’t have worked for the movies after that. i personally really love how the colors in new moon look, especially the chase scene with victoria and the pack in the forest + the song is so good
@@rintonkatsu5203 guess it really didnt make a difference : P
Yup. Catherine Hardwick made a moody indie film, Chris Weitz treated it almost like a fairytale, David Slade went for straightforward horror, and Bill Condon was sort of a mix of all of them.
thank you for this. it's my first time on the channel. i appreciate the trip down memory lane (i was in college at the time, and my friend Mary brought her copy of the book into our Intro to Western Religions class with a book cover from a text on the historical jesus... all so i could read it during lectures. Twilight books were checked out of every library in the Des Moines area lol. best part is we were embarrassed to be caught reading a trashy young adult novel, but we also *knew* without a doubt that a lot of other people on campus were doing the same sneaking around to read the first book before they saw the movie!) and also, i genuinely laughed at you as Charlie Swan. golden! keep on keepin' on.
0:27 Your Freudian Slip of "crave" was hilarious 😂
The fact that MCR preferred to sing in simlish rather than do the OST of the movie is truly one of the events in all time
By accounts of other artists, singing in simlish is actually really fun so this might not be a good comparison
They missed out tbh, the Twilight soundtrack is a certified banger
It really is though, like I regularly listen to it because it's just that good. And fun fact, so is the 50 Shades of Grey OST lol. Excellent music.
@@emilyb.8219
@@emilyb.8219 you can't beat supermassive blackhole
Respect.
Jasper is so relatable.
As someone who had to quit drinking in a very alcohol-heavy culture, but still had to be around it constantly. Facing the thoughts, cravings, and pressure to "just have one" by every drunk person around takes so much strength. But all you can do is sit there and fight your urges sometimes.
Jasper, you've got this.
I know I'm just a random person on youtube commenting this, but, I know you've got this!! You also gotta take it one step and day at a time and soon it won't be as hard of a struggle as it was 💜💜💜
Anna, you're right. I am 8 month sober in a few days, and it honestly hasn't been too terrible for me after the first bit of it all. The past ⅔ of a year have ended up being plenty of art, drawing, and working but out of passion. I even decided to start making TH-cam content about a week ago.
I sort of assume you're sober too, because we tend to be very supportive to each other on the internet. But whether or not you are, as one random person on the internet to another, thank you for the support and comfort, and you've got your this too!
@@mia_seym thank you and congrats on 8 months! I definitely will be subscribing to you💜
you're both great!
43 days w out it today, & I agree. Abstaining from temptation is horribly difficult but also a display of insane moral resolve. Cheers to sobriety!
"Johnny Bravo-level horny" really got me LOL
ur editing is on point !!
My dad said he would disowned me if I watched Twilight I still have never watched Twilight so now I gotta know how someone who did watch it feels about it.
It’s t i m e
thats some heavy misogyny on his part wtf(i never said these movies werent misogynistic, lol i like to laugh at these movies, thats why i enjoy them)
@@liallialcrocmisogyny? More like extreme cliché, the movie is
your dad sounds like a really wise man
you care whether or not your dad disowns you? crazy
IT'S HERE IT'S HERE TEAM CHARLIE WE STAN!!! One thing I forgor to mention in our talk - this was a huge era of "not like other girls" tropes with Bella fitting that perfectly so naturally it appealed to the adolescent female audience of the time 😵💫
Oh absolutely. I thought I was quirky and different for being rather quiet and not wearing makeup (because I was and still am too lazy for that). Really glad I grew out of that 😂
Nailed it
Remember there was also the group of not like other girls who disliked twilight saga, because it was popular. I was one of them -_- luckily grew out of my cringy teen angst
✨ I'm not like other girls ✨
~ girl that is exactly like the others
I had this video bookmarked for so long and kept meaning to come back to it - god it was NOT disappointing. Your little Charlie bits had me CRACKING up so hard. The being 11 in 2008 is a feeling I wish I didn't have, but here we are lmao. Great video !!
33:14 Hilariously on point acting. 😂
love it!
jacob had so much potential but they just cut his hair and gave him anger issues where he storms off as a wolf. he used to be a sweetie and then they RUINED HIMMMM
I think because Jacob was not planned from the beginning it makes sense that she made him great in the second book so everyone would root for him and then turned him into a horrible guy later just to get him out of the way and get back to Edward. Honestly a really smart way to sell more books cause people who would never have interest in reading about a girl and her vampire hear about the Jacob V Edward debate and get curious. Jacob was never supposed to be endgame it was basically equivalent to a celebrity PR stunt to get people talking
We want shark boy jacob
Yeaaahh but honestly, in the movies he was never as awful as in the books. Dude is angry AND even more possessive! It’s to a toxic point more often than not. Still, though, even with his anger issues in the movies, Jacob was waaayyy less problematic than Edward there. It’s why as a kid I always answered this during the debates: I’m team Edward for the books, team Jacob for the movies.
Edit: I wrote this before watching the whole thing. I totally forgot about the SA from Jacob. My tiny child mind thought it was okay (probably because my bf at the time was doing that shit aaaaaaaa)
Neither of them are good options
Imagine if Bella had used the oldest term. "You're..." "Say it." "An apotemkin...." "What? -_0"
lmao right
i found you from the jojo siwa video and i've been watching your old videos every day since then. you are so damn funny. the skits absolutely kill me
I found your channel today and have binged 5 or 10 of your videos.. I knew you must be around my age with all of the on point references lol. Great content.
I feel like Bella was the first ever y/n.
Evidences:
-all boys are skimping for her
-she not much personality
-the most mysterious and famous boy falls for her and turns out to be a 109 year old vampire
-she reads and listens to music. That's it.
-her parents are divorced
-her mom has a new bf
-she's not like other girls
-she's ✨awkward✨
-everyone and everything is after her
-she dies and respawns
-messy hair
Did I miss something?
(Also, Were there y/n's before?)
I'll add some points!:
-superpower is just super self control, which negates any potential problems of being a new vampire which they had hyped up immensely
-marries into mega rich family
-gets to keep everyone in her life and everything is wrapped in a neat little bow at the end
I say this as someone who loved the books as a child while they were coming out- yes, she very much is a bland self-insert character.
As a Y/N writer and frequent reader (Favourite pre-existing characters like Anime characters cause I feel weird about live action ones and real ppl is a no go (apparently Kpop idols have those abt them and I'm still in the denial stage bruh -_-) mostly known as character X reader) I have a constant fear of my Y/N ever have any of these 😂 some of them can happen tho... Like marrying into rich family can't help it if the character is originally rich lol
she's ✨clumsy✨
Y/N has existed long before Twilight but the farther back you go it just uses second tense not the stupid “your name” abbreviation that’s jarring.
The Black Eyed Peas 😂😂😂😂😂 that is so fucking true and I always knew they reminded me of something but I could never put my finger on it. You just did that!
I was actually 8 in 2008, Gabi. And yes I did pretend to be a Vampire after watching it.
after i watched h2o i convinced other 6th graders i was a mermaid
just gotta say people born in 2000 dont need to subtract/add to calculate their age for certain years and thats pretty cool
Same! I loved it so much lol, I pretended to be a werewolf after the new moon. These movies occupies such a important and special place in my heart
@@abbyz13When I was 5, I watched Rudolph the red nosed reindeer & the next day, I told everyone in my class that, from this day forward m, my name was now Rudolph🤣
@@mosstits any year, btw.
28:03 I was not ready for the overlay
The smirk Pattinson puts on when he says 'hi' is the funniest shit I've ever seen
The part that always gets me is she has legit reason for nightmares that cause blood curdling screams…she was literally almost killed by a vampire and started the process of changing which is canonically horrible amounts of pain. And it makes sense that they would come back now that she doesn’t feel protected surrounded by her own personal vampire coven…
…but no. It’s because he broke up with her 🤣
I still think she has nightmares because of that
I mean it never gets clarified what she dreams of and I mean she got tortured
To be fair, my family moved to a small town (smaller than Forks, WA) when I was in junior high. Nearly all of the kids were born and raised there so any new person attracted massive attention until the newness wore off. Maybe that's what was happening to Bella?
I think that's definitely it! I'm from a town of 1000 people and it was like that even in high school when new people moved there.
@@sarahm8657 OMG 1000! We only had about 2500, I can't imagine less than half of that 😹😹 small towns are something!
@@sarahm8657 1,000 people! Did people, you know ))(( and then find out they were siblings!? 😬
There must have been SO much gossip! There were 1,000 kids/adults in just my school, and the girl's school next to us somehow knew my name (which I hated lol).
There must be some awesome things about living in a tiny village though? Surely?
@@sarahm8657the amount of kids in my high school was over 1000. i cant even imagine
Very true. This happened to me when I was the new kid in a small school. After a few weeks everyone had adjusted and no longer cared though lmao
I love that Bella practically webmd’s her way to the vampire conclusion
I know this isn’t the latest video, but I am cracking up. That little OH well Imagine. Was pure gold. ❤😂