I had a friend about 5 years ago who was exactly like this. When I realized what he was doing, I dropped him. I don't need toxic people to make me feel bad, life is hard enough.
Did you try talking to them? Nothing wrong with ‘being’ toxic. But ‘staying’ toxic is inexcusable. Sadly, majority of our behavior is learned from the environment we grow up in rather than how we are born. I lost all my friends. Even my wife in my profile picture. It took a friend 2 months she was the sweetest person I ever met. Now my ex wife she had issues with her family and I gave up college to help her out in her country, she ended up taking her frustrations out on me, and eventually she got better and stopped doing that. But I was the same from start to finish and she saw I was a bad influence and dropped me. Then there’s my best friend since 8th grade, who father left him and his mom’s boyfriends used to abuse him. It messed him up so bad and I seriously wanted to help him. But after 15 years and all his research and videos like this, he came up with the conclusion I’m some master manipulator who took advantage of him. I’ve never been violent and the only time I shown my teeth was when he was addicted to drugs and I wanted him to just stop. He used to beat me up and I never defended myself. It used to make him so perplex and so confused why won’t I put my hands up? Why won’t I swing back. Why did I look at him that way? Obviously it was all a ploy, right? To make myself out to be a victim? You’ll think I know all these answers but I really didn’t, and when I lost my last and final friend...someone who was good to me... the event fucked me up really bad. I cry all the time. I watch movies and I laugh/cry/get angry... I know I’m not deprived of empathy or emotions so why do I keep losing friends? I’m not toxic... all I ever wanted was to stay friends and help them. Devote my life for them. Well I did seek help out of respect for her last request before she ended our friendship. Turns out I’m not a psycho or some narcissistic. I’m just some loner who really never learned how to properly behave. My mother is a narcissist, my sisters are borderline, and my father is too laid back and I adopted all of their personalities believing this is the way. I didn’t even know what I was doing was wrong. I didn’t try to hurt my friends or even manipulate them to do evil things, I just wanted them to stay my friend and I suffocated them, and I played the victim when they didn’t want to spend time with me. All the answers I thought I had, switched, and I realized that even though some of my friends were toxic too... so was I. Christmas passed and everything I learned about myself is useless to them. I wish I could tell them I’m really sorry. I didn’t know any better. Growing up I was an outcast thanks to Adderall from my ADHD. The way I act is all I see in tv, movies, and animations. The way I behavior when things don’t go the way I act was how my family acts. Ultimately, yeah I was toxic but it took a good person ending our friendship for me to get help for me to seek a psychologist. The bottomline is: if I didn’t seek help... I would probably kill myself. And if I feel this, so do many others... I think a good portion of people who do end up killing themselves have felt the same way I felt months ago. Pushed away, unwanted, confused, and just lonely. The reason I didn’t seek help before was because I thought my behavior was okay; after all, those that told me my behavior was okay never apologized for hurting me.
@@suzeray87 thank you for sharing your experience. I wish you a kind and gentle recovery and new good friends. You have helped me understand someone I used to be friends with much better
@@suzeray87 I'm glad you got help. And all the people in the comments here get off on calling people "narcissists", I guess it makes them feel better about themselves. I'm sure they would have considered you a narcissist, even though you're not! They would call you "evil", or a "piece of sh*t " and then wonder why people with mental illness dont seek help..... and most of these people are self-proclaimed "empaths". HA! What a load of crap!
@@Benjy86 schadenfreude... it’s pleasure derived by someone from another person’s misfortune. It’s different from watching someone slip on ice and fall, then laughing about it. It’s more like watching someone you dislike slip and break their leg, then feint concern while feeling joy like he got what he/she deserves. Take movies for example. Most people love action movies. Hero vs villain. Epic conclusion of the movie ends with villain getting what is coming to them and it’s soooo enjoyable! But people apply that to real life, especially in social justice. We all believe in something. We all believe we are good. When there’s someone or something that contradicts or opposes our views or ideals, then we trigger our stress response fight or flight because they MUST be evil. Online nobody runs away, because they believe there are no consequences that’s why TH-cam and Facebook is a cesspool of truly heinous people that get pleasure of other’s misfortune only because they “got what was coming to them.” When our fight or flight response kicks, we stop listening and start arguing and start blaming, because any self-responsibility or self-doubt is DEFEAT!! As long as the fight ends with you still believing in what you do, then victory is achieved. Thats just how our minds work. A true empath is a Good Samaritan. You can tell a lot about someone by how they treat their enemies.
And they NEED to know your every move and all your business so they can take over your life and call it being a great friend and they don’t take NO for an answer like BULLIES
Definitely bullies who want to control you. Then they get offended or angry when you tell them you want to do things differently. They attempt to manipulate you threw emotional control. Then you may start to feel you need to have their approval for certain things... Those covert narcissists are hard to spot. They come across as so nice at first- (love bombing) and act like they have your best interest at heart! 😑 I’m glad Im narc free now👍
Barbara Banks 1 Amen NARC FREE from a partner since 2018 but I just got rid of a so called friend that was OVERT 2019 she had to go it was very very hard to get rid of her she still don’t know why she just thinks I am wrong oh well
soaring feather I cut ties with a narc friend in 2017. (Before I understand what a narcissist was) I had bought something for myself, and found myself worrying what she would think of it. That scared me and I thought, why is her approval so important to me? I didn’t realize (at that time) I was being covertly manipulated and controlled. It’s kinda embarrassing for me to talk about it. But, there it is. I’m just grateful for TH-cam. They have a lot of valuable info on here. Like Dr. Ramani. If you haven’t heard of her, she’s a psychiatrist and educator on narcissistic abuse. She’s excellent.
That is the thing, genuinally good and nice people are in danger of b eing falsely categorized. That is why the sense we have of a person [you know that feeling that you can get that somehow, what is being said/done doesn't feel genuine? That is the key! you be you, don't let someone's understanding of a certain personality type shape the way you think and are. We still need geuinely nice people. =)
If you have the strength to see it, you have the strength to overcome it. Many of us who have learnt these toxic behaviours at a young age, are good people albeit somewhat (or even very) misguided. If we keep nurturing the desire to be wholesome, decent human beings, we will eventually get there. You can do this, Madeleine and Florent! :)
6 behaviours of manipulative people who pretend to be nice. 1. They play the victim. 2 . Love bombing(excessive love show in short period of time ). 3.They use your weakness against you. 4 They make you feel guilty. 5.They pretend to have same likes as you . 6.They gossip about people to you.
My next door neighbor did this. Has now spread gossip about me. Lies btw. A smear campaign. Pretends to be so scared of me has got the other neighbors to make sure I don't hurt her. She's next door. A nasty evil person.
Just remember she can't work alone. She's a coward basically who has to have back up. Keep your head up and maintain manners and dignity. Remember you are head and shoulders above her type have faith in yourself and the higher powers around you. Something will give in the end♥️♥️♥️
Oh they absolutely love to play the victim, they'll tell everyone that will listen what you done to them, but they won't tell people about what they done in the first place to make you react that way and boy do they like to slag people off behind their backs, but they'll be as nice as pie to their face! The kicker is that so many people get taken in by their bs, when all they deserve is a massive slap upside their head!
Yes...when my friend knows I'm angry with her because of her bs she plays the victim and makes up a story to try and win me back...pathetic! Need to get rid of her!!!
Its okay if both partners thinks differently but as long both opinions can be compatible, moral and fair for everyone. But if is not compatible and always me me me me because I'm always right and your not... that's very immature and creates Toxic relationship which is better to run away.
A friend of mine was manipulating me so much and I didn’t even realise it. From the moment I stopped giving her so much attention, she ended the relationship and said I really hurt her.
I will probably get the same reaction from a current friendship if I try the same thing with my friend. They are going to tell me I'm very offensive and then I will understand that I can't be their friend any more. Said friend gets offended if I withdraw myself from her just to have time to myself if I don't justify verbally why I'm getting my own space away from her. I suppose I'm starting to realise that this is her way of controlling me because she can't control her own life. I respect other people when they need their space, so I feel I deserve the same in return if I need my own space.
Trust your gut 💪. I used to think most people are well intentioned like myself, but I learned the long and the hard way, now I have my walls way up just like you. I also limited my "good deed" intake and focus on myself first (even though that used to sound selfish) and afterwards what I am able for others. Sometimes kindness is signal for abusers to take advantage; or more often used by abusers to reel you in to trust them as bait. It makes it hard to know if Anyone is genuine nowadays. .. just sayin :/
@@Swisstriplet Or when you’re uncertain about something. Often times you question them, because you think “maybe I’m misunderstanding”? Or “what am I mistaken on” ?- You just want clarity between you and the other person (or group). But if they lose it, and begin to belittle you and start the smear campaigns against you- That’s when you begin to realize; you’re not dealing with empathetic, rational human being(s). They seek dominance, and control over you and others. This is not love.
@@leahc9695 I agree with you- however, it doesn’t sound selfish to love and protect yourself. “Love thy neighbor as thyself”... A part of love is self protection. When we learn what good boundaries are; we also reflect on our own words and behaviors. Good boundaries is not just protecting ourselves from others, but protecting others from ourselves. Our human nature wants to fight back when insulted. These natural impulses are best resisted and walking away is best. (going no or low contact) ... But yea! Listen to your gut- God doesn’t want us to be a doormat for others! And willingly allow people to use us. That would be enabling bad behaviors of others- it’s not good for you; OR for them either. Its God given insight/intuition that gives us warnings about those who are attempting to take advantage of us in some way. Trust what God has given you. And protect yourself! 🥰☺️❤️🙏
@@Barbara_Banks_1 I know now it doesn't (or shouldn't) sound selfish, but that's what I was deeply indoctrinated through orthodox religion since a kid and toxic family... It's been only more recent times I learnt that, but it's been quite hard to change, as there is a feeling of guilt and feel almost evil for that. But it's been around under 2 years since I was trying to change that and I can start to see the benefits of that. Take care ❣️
The sad things is you only realize that they are manipulative and narcissistic when it's too late, because we all over look these signs in the beginning. What I'm reading is what I went through after I was replaced by someone else.
Trying to move on from this toxic person too. I’m afraid that they might do something to me like hurt me yet they never made any threats. What should I do?
@@metalrockstarizer89 just stay no contact to be honest i was afraid of narcissist when he came to my job to hoover, but they are really cowards just keeping ignoring them that breaks them down.
Unfortunately my son has met a young girl who has these traits, on the rebound from another basket case who he supported for three years. She is as cunning as a fox she duped me for a short while but fortunately I've dated complicated women in the past I picked up on it very quickly. She has even managed to turn my son against me but unfortunately for this vixen she is dealing with a wolf I am systematically breaking her down and I'm able to predict her every move, trying to pry him away from her is a very different story. My son is very handsome she even said some one said he was punching above his weight 😂she is the one that's punching but she has to go as her mind games are detrimental to his well being.
They can apologize but then keep doing it because you speaking up is showing them what hurts you and their apologies are there way of getting away with it. An apology with no change isn't an apology!
Avoid contact with narcissists at all costs. If you have to live with them in your life, limit contact and don't believe the nasty things they say about you.
I agree 💯. But remember, women are Narrissast also. I love animals. people not so much. But, I cry when my dog died at the age of five. He was my best friend. He took a chunk of my heart with him. I still have his ashes because I don't want to let go of him.
@@buddywilliams5650 I'm sorry about your dog 😑 Animals bring us so much joy and they leave a void when they leave. I hope you will be able to move on and find happiness, while keeping the nice memories in your heart.
With those trying to turn people against you let them talk themselves into revealing who they are. People get sick of hearing negative things constantly.
I've just washed my hands with some of these types of people and when I confronted them about their behaviour you've guessed it they played the victim 🤦🏻♂️
7. Gaslighting "I haven't said/promised that." "You did say so." "I have said otherwise." (although they haven't) "I don't remember." "You remember wrongly." "You are too sensitive." (when calling them out for their abuse) "Stop playing the victim." (esp. when being confronted with their own obnoxious behavior) "You are being ridiculous." (when addressing a serious issue) "Everybody knows that you are stupid/silly/insane/whatever." "Not my fault." "It's your fault." "That has never happened." "Stop blaming _me_ for _your_ problems/issues/mistakes!" (They do know that they have blundered, but they cannot admit that!) "You are making this up." (although you definitely aren't) "You must have misplaced that." (after they have deliberately placed said item somewhere else) "Told you!" (when they definitely haven't) "Stop twisting the words in my mouth!" (when, in fact, they are the ones doing it) "You don't know what you are talking about." (esp. when you are calling bullcrap on them) "You deserve it." (after yet another round of abuse) etc. pp. This is one of their favorite (if not *the* favorite) tactics to keep you in a constantly confused state so that you are eventually questioning your own perception, which makes it particularly insidious. This is used to level the ground for further, more destructive abuse, because once you are completely unsure about what's really going on, you have a hard time spotting their evil machinations. This one is particularly devastating as it can cause serious damage to your cognitive functions.
@Eliana Sampson saying these things doesnt make you a narcissist. People tend to call all of their exes (or anyone they dont get along with) "narcissists" nowadays, especially women. The reality is narcs only make up 1% of the population. Relax, if you are trying to better yourself, you're not a "narcissist".
@@Benjy86 wrong 1 out of 10 have NPD, by early 90's estimates. Also one doesn't have to meet the criteria for NPD to be considered a narcissist. Albeit, I agree with you it's become a cliche term as awareness is spread. I say the same about PTSD, the majority of people wearing it like a gold star, haven't a clue what it is. Partly to blame is misdiagnosis; but most are self-diagnosed. It's really insulting to those that suffer severe nerve pain of the infliction. But, I'm digressing. Just because someone his a serial cheater, or a violently abusive person, doesn't mean they are a narcissist. It could be one of many disorders. On that, I too am sick of the mislabeling...most likely by people with uncheck mental issues of their own.
@@Star17venus I dont know where you get your information from, but it's actually an estimated 0.5%. Look it up. And no, you cant just go around calling people narcissists who dont meet the criteria for a NPD diagnosis. That's the whole reason the word has lost all meaning! Saying that 10% of the population are narcissists is pure conjecture and speculation.
When they only apologise because your upset not because they have seen what they have done wrong. Just so they can feel better about themselves and tell themselves they tried.
Give them a bitter experience for to remember you forever.I'm lucky that these type people never gets click with me and I'm not afraid to confront them and fire them if needed.
I am actually planning to do this to someone. I won't be doing anything illegal or unethical but she's not going to like it and I'm not going to write her a letter like I'm tempted to do. I'm tempted to write a letter explaining why I'm doing what I'm doing but I know what happens when you do that. It just keeps the contact going and you have to listen to more lies and nonsense. There's no point explaining these things to somebody who is just horrible. It just doesn't do any good
This is 100% true. I deal with a person like this everyday while at work. They can and will literally drain your energy. But now, I know exactly how to deal with this person.
Unfortunately I have encountered so many people like this and I will say it hurts when you realise that what your gut feeling thought is actually right..Sad that this happens when you don't deserve it. Thank you for this video.
Gossipers, friends or family Never open up to them, they feed off of drama Even if you don't like the person they are talking about do not commiserate or agree ,as they hey are not your friend. Resist the urge to flap your tongue with them,walk away, go do something else, and bless them. Don't hate them, but don't likewise trust, confude in them or try to make them your friend. Hating leads to obsessive thinking about the hated one and you really don't want them taking up too much space in your thoughts.
WHEN THEY GOSSIP TO YOU THEY ARE MORE LIKELY TO GOSSIP ABOUT YOU. SOMETIMES HOWEVER IF IT STAYS BETWEEN YOU TWO THAT IS GOOD. BUT NOW THAT I KNOW THE WAY SHE USED ME FOR MONEY, NOW I CAN'T TRUST HER ANYMORE SO IF SHE WANTS TO STAY NEAR ME, SHE IS GOING TO HAVE TO FLIP BACKWARDS TO EARN HER TRUST
Ok I fell into the gossip trap and she told,she also asked for money on multiple occasions and I haven’t known her a year.she come and dump all her problems on me I felt horrible
It's so true. These people all have their names. Narcissists, Sociopathic narcissists. The ones your talking about playing the victim. Are definitely 'Covert narcissist'. They're the invidious ones. The worst.
@@melshaw264 that's kinda messed up to say about another human being, and shows how uneducated you are on the subject. ACTUAL narcissists (which are fairly rare, only 1-2% of the population) aren't "evil".. they have developed poor coping skills due to abuse and past traumas. But hey, I'm sure youre just a perfect little angel, huh?
If you really read into it, I feel like these are the secret plot points to many rom/coms over the last 20 years where the guy is trying to pursue the girl or vice versa. So as people watch these things, their subconscious mind picks it up and they in turn start to think this is how people engage with each other so it must be normal. Since these 6 behaviours are always in a narcissistic person's arsenal, it makes me really wonder if the narcissistic person had such a poor family life growing up that they turned to T.V for guidance and ended up unintentionally learning how to effectively manipulate people. Just my 2 cents.
INTERESTING POINT BUT IT ALL BOILS DOWN THAT PARENTS GRANDPARENTS DID NOT INTRODUCE GOD ENOUGH OR AT ALL AND THAT IS HOW SATAN IS RIPPING FAMILIES APART'
You just described a friendship I’ve withdrawn from for all these points! I went on instinct after a while of feeling unsettled / not at peace, but you’ve clarified verbally why I was feeling that way. Thanks!
I work with a lot of people like this. When you were in the room they can't love you enough but the moment you walk out of the room they can't hate you enough and start talking about you.
I’m witnessing the temper tantrums of a control freak right now and when I tell you its childish n hilarious because I hear these outbursts from time to time that are implied towards me simply because I am a lone wolf and REFUSE to be controlled
"Wolves are highly social animals that live in packs, but not all wolves stay with the same pack their entire lives. This, however, doesn’t mean they prefer to be alone. Young adult wolves who end up leaving the pack they were born into usually do so to form a pack of their own. That’s a big difference here - lone wolves don’t leave because they want to stay alone, they leave in order to find a mate, their own territory, and form their own pack." Wolves mate for life and have strong social and family bonds. A lone wolf has really low chances of survival and the mainbreason a wolf TEMPORARILY hangs alone it's because it left his original pack (family) and is now looking for a partner to start a new pack (family). Some wolves also become really depressed after the death of their partner and can choose not to remain in the pack and wander around until their death.
have one manipulator friend for several years. He is doing all the exact stuff that the video tells . I'm so glad that i gave him up and start building a healthy friendship!
This is hard bc people who are truly suffering are victim blamed on top of it but manipulative, dominant people will mostly get what they want in terms of support.
I learned that I am not the type who can be manipulated easily or be a manipulator. That is the best of me. It comes with time and wanting to be mature.
I'd honestly love a video on how to safely and peacefully live with manipulators, because some of us are forced to. It causes so much distress and anxiety. Especially when you are deemed an easy scape goat.
That's a good idea, and I hope we'll see such a vid soon. From a lay person's perspective, though, there really isn't a way to live safely and peacefully with manipulators (narcissists) because everything you do to try to cope with them is fuel for them -- everything. You can’t live in harmony with someone who’s trying to destroy you. That’s the reality. The fact that you are there at all is what enables them to weaponize every aspect of your existence against you. While being safe and at peace isn't an option, there are many standard ways to reduce distress and anxiety, such as gray rock (non reactive behavior or modified gray rock if you have kids together or a business). Distance yourself from them as much as possible. Of course, if you can afford it, meet with a counselor who's highly qualified in narcissistic abuse. Careful to vet the person with specific questions about his/her experience and qualifications as many if not most of them are clueless about NPD. I've seen videos on the Internet on how to select a good analyst and how to cope with a manipulator. The more you know about manipulation the better you’ll be able recognize it before it happens and take steps to avoid being victimized. Read good books on the subject, and check out videos online. Finally, there are a few highly qualified lawyers knowledgeable on divorcing a narc. It may be possible to go no contact and begin to heal.
Yes.andcthey play on and are masters of playing upon any real ,genuine feelings they get from you.They take total and full advantage of anything good and are pros at the art of blowing smoke up your ass and being fake.
There are tons of videos on TH-cam. If you can't avoid contact with narcissists at all costs, then you need to develop a way to protect your inner self by not believing what they say to you so they won't be able to hurt you and weaken your self-esteem. It's best if you can limit or avoid contact.
Thanks Beyond Blue this is what my narcissistic father does love bombing, bullying, neglect, silent treatment, gaslighting, double standards, playing victim, instigating fights with me, takes advantage of my kindness and empathy.
The saddest part of my life knowing and completely awakened since when I was a child that my Dad is a manipulator and narcissistic person. I still love him even he's like that because he's my Dad.
Don't love someone who betrayed you , manipulated you done you wrong don't care if their your friend family member mother ,dad , parents grandparents it a hell no
@Caleb D not at all. i've been there. the morally right choice is to stop enabling abusers, even if it means we have to do without dna-sharers in our life. the more people love and support them, the more people they can get away with hurting. we have a responsibility. so many think they are "nice" and martyr themselves "loving" abusers.. when really that's only "nice" to perps. it's nasty and hateful toward their victims. it's time to be 'nice" to the victims for once. and kind is a better word for that.
I had some experiments. That's a classmate in high school. At the very first time, she showed how mature, reliable and kind she was, yah and i appreciated and cherished her so much. Story began when we were getting closer, she talked about my weakness in front of people. I told her she could make suggestions, but she didn't. Take advantage of me :) yolo and still call me best friend :) huh?
My ex would use his knowledge about my weaknesses to embarrass me in front of others. It was his way of getting me to say the right things about him when we were with friends or family.
Good video. Thanks for sharing. Have a blessed day, and yes this video describes someone that have narcissist personality disorder. These people are draining to be around, and they can be dangerous to be around as well. Be careful if you encounter these type of people including family members.
This describes my workplace and one of the reasons I am bullied often...thanks for sharing this video and I can relate a lot to what these type of people can do to an innocent person
They also excuse their shitty behavior as being a “prank” or a “joke” when in reality it’s extremely far from it. They will say you’re being sensitive, even go as far as saying they’re “looking out for you” in some situations, they won’t let you get away from any past situations that you’ve grown up from or moved on from, slander your name and those that you are close to trying to cause a rift between you, and if they know you, are stalking you or used to know you, any little thing they can blab about you or exploit because they think you’re insecure about it, they will. That doesn’t sound like a prank or a joke to me, it’s malicious manipulation and someone who is trying to cause major damage in your life. They could have everyone on earth fooled, just don’t let them fool you.
Great job getting this info out there so people and defend themselves from these devils. In philosophy, egoism posits that all behaviors are motivated by self-interest. It suggests that everything we do or say is intended to benefit ourselves. When such behavior goes to the extreme and manifests as deceitfulness, that's when we need to run away from manipulators as fast as we can and never look back in our own best interest.
But if we all walked away from those who did us wrong, then acting in self-interest would mean acting with good morality. In this way, either altruism or complete selfishness both look the exact same in practice. That is how a healthy World works. Time for us to make it very not worth it for others to act nasty.
1) they play the victim. 2) love bombing ( showers you with gifts, love) 3) use your weakness against you. 4) they make you feel guilty. 5) they pretend to have the same likes as you. 6) they gossip about people to you.
Each narcissist You met is a resource to study more about narcissists and know their weaknesses. Prepare you more in the future. They are giving themselves away very easily, they are so bad at hiding, so each time You are becoming stronger. 😎
Thank you for your comments. You reminded me of a perspective that I try to maintain with manipulators, or any event in my life that can be challenging to face, yet deeply rewarding to get through. When I noticed other people diving head first into negativity and gossip I run the other way and ask myself a question: What did I learn from this? How can it benefit me and possibly others?
You guys rock. I know people like that and they know I know. I will put that person in check so fast they will spin around in circles and they stay far away from me.
I’m currently experiencing this with a friend and, unfortunately, music partner. To anyone going thru this; I’m sorry. And I know how much it hurts to realize this about someone you thought was in your closest circle, but you need to get them out. Easier said than done, as I haven’t even pulled the trigger on this yet, but just know I’m in your corner when you do it.
It happened to me too with a vocalist who I met and befriended because they wanted a drummer for their band. I just called them out on their shit as soon as I realised what was going on. They had a temper tantrum and made the mistake of trying to turn people against me with really absurd lies that everyone knows are ridiculous. It was a bit chaotic for me to deal with temporarily, but ultimately they exposed their manipulative tendencies to a lot of people and basically ruined things for themselves. The rest of the band quit and the other musicians in our area know to stay the fuck away from this person now.
Most manipulative and toxic persons can appear very nice especially in the beginning of the relationship and that makes it more complicated to see the red flags because we don't want to believe that these "nice" people are not what they pretend they are even when it is claire that they have abusive behaviours that are harmful to us. Those I met were very kind to me but only when I do or behave the way they wanted but they abuse me the very first moment I was not doing what they want anymore that is when I discovered that their love were conditional. I think one Clair sign of a toxic person is a "two face". Someone who shows a particular behaviour at first to make you at ease but change personality in other occasion.
I’m dealing with someone like this now. I’ve noticed the game because my last relationship was like this. It’s a lot of narcissism🤦🏾♀️ I will not lose myself
I think it's so important to note that we can all portray some of these characteristics some of the time. It worries me how easy labels are being banded around these days. We are all human. The most important thing for me, is to see how people react to criticism and whether people are willing to work on themselves. That's a sign of a decent human being to me. It seems like so many people want to be accepted, flaws and all, but if someone else displays any "red flag" behaviour then OH MY GOD - THEY ARE TOXIC and a NARC. It's ridiculous. No wonder so many people have shit relationships these days. The difference between real prolonged manipulative abuse and being a bit of a dickhead human being at times is huge. It really takes away from people who have suffered extreme abuse. Just like everyone has anxiety and depression these days. I highly beg to differ.
I hear ya. I started thinking hey I'm desiring to be growing as a human and be working on being good in the moment and shoot hopefully I got a right motive .. Yet sometimes hey I start critiquing myself though I know initially it was good but I'm thinking this has GOT to be people who are really blind or outwardly being sheeplike but inwardly don't care or are running so busy they are on auto pilot but because they are busy they don't stop to regroup so they doing a show.... Yeah I can see where this or these people can be as fake but they just got to recenter and really hear whoever they feel like they were helping out in an outer show and really help by listening. Allot of people need a listening ear and also point blank facts, directions, anger the how to "fish".... How to's and to get up. I know if we tell someone accidentally that we helped someone that's different but doing things in front of people to be seen by people or any thing like that we do eventually grow out of because we mature up and don't care if someone thinks we are genuinely good or not. Especially strangers. Who cares? Only our circle, family friends we hope really gets healed, fixed, whole and if they are well and then the reach out to others.... Sometimes we can reach out to others because we must let go of ones in our heart in an outer way so we breathe in good harmony and even fit them it may be more harmonic as well. These videos I think get us thinking.... At least I did one day when I was thinking hey what if I am this type of person or that type?!??? I enjoy psychology type talks and so I was yeah let me make sure this is really being checked out. If only it was an obvious thing. I've heard some people don't even know they are. But "motives". I guess the best motive about anything was our intelligent designer's. Take care neighbor
This is a great video, thanks a lot for making it. I have fallen a victim of such a person for 10 years. He's always lying, cheating and blames me for his actions, because I call him a liar. He started manipulating his friends, family and even to the point of dating my friends daughter and still denying it. He turned all these people against me. He's married but he will be talking to all his exs and about 10 different women around the clock. He feels threatened by me because am the only person on this planet that knows him deep down. I'll block him and he will show up at my door and start love bombing. I finally made up my mind not to block him but not to pick his calls or answer his texts. He finally dropped me a text asking me for a favour and I answered "sorry but I can't" and I haven't heard from him ever since (for a while). It is the most evil and toxic place I've ever been in my life for ten good years. He always wants me to prove his acts, otherwise they are false accusations but I know that he will never change. The difficult part is that the other women buy into his manipulation. It takes time but you can also heal.
Love bombing.. Showing so much love for so little time period. This i have suffered from and i can understand better now. Never again will i allow myself fall to this tactic. Thank you for the video.
I know someone exactly like this! A frenemy lol. She's extremely jealous of me and always has to one up me because she can't stand that I have good things going on in my life! I'm very aware of her manipulation and I'm looking forward to getting rid of her for good!
My father 101. Extremely manipulative and also a narcissist. His forte was always to make ppl feel guilty. Extreme insecurity as well. I could tell you stories from the years.
Hey:). I feel you... Just something interesting I wanted to share with you. Read a different interpretation of a "narcissist". Such a great article! The whole point of it was that "narcissists" are actually extremely vulnerable, hiding their pain deep inside and HAVE to use some mask to not let people hurt them. Somehow, this word shifted from exactly THAT description to what we use it for now. So, I stopped thinking of "narcissist" as we are used to, and as for me it is easier to "label" a person (my ex) as a sociopath, maybe. Google it if you'd like. PS Narcissus, the beautiful young man, was suffering immensely in history's view on him. :)
SOLOMEA QUINN I agree. He is the weakest broken soul I know. The compassion kept me hopeful and us together 35 years. The problem is he is a very dangerous and vindictive individual. There’s no room for that in anyone’s life. We can have love and compassion from a distance 🥰
I did get accused of acting like a victim alot. I told a friend about things that have happened to me in my life where I really believe I was in those situations. I also am guilty of telling a friend things people said behind his back but I do not believe my intentions were bad. I did have a bad experience trusting certain people and got burned and did not want the same thing to happen to my friend but I guess sometimes you have to let people figure it out on their own. I will definitely no longer do that.
You aren’t doing anything wrong. Trusting is not a bad thing, people just change or hide who they truly are. Moving forward pay attention to peoples mindsets, mentalities, actions and how they treat others. Also if someone tells u something about someone whether true or not, thread carefully with both because u don’t know who is fake or telling the truth. Or if 3 or more people tell u something similar about someone there’s usually some truth to that so u choose how to thread with them or if u should even be friends. Know what to share with who about yourself or others. But no matter what you do people will be people as humans could be viscous no matter how much u set boundaries. People are comfortable in being trashy and usually are just project bur in whatever you do stay true to yourself and others and do everything with pure intentions. Just LIVE life in true peace and happiness and build a thick skin to backlash because if u feel like u tell things about people, someone somewhere is doing the same somewhere about u, that’s just life that we can’t control
excellent video... dealing with a group of manipulative narcissist... you must cut them off completely and not even speak too them at all... they will as well attempt to make you dependent on them... so they can attempt too stay in contact as well... III
That's sounds like my ex friend's,they're definitely all this...A manipulative frenemies too. Is why'd I'm loner. and single too. It definitely helps being alone when I'm introverted girl too.
I liked this, I subbed. I'm a victim of a dysfunctional violent narcissistic family. They tried to make me feel guilty about feeling awful just being in their presence. I left home at 17. I really should of disappeared and legally changed my last name at legal age. I got nothing but a fucking nightmare from being born into their bullshit!!
Seems like the story of my life.Unfortunately I grew up in a household with a mother who was manipulative,made bad choices in friendships and extremely stubborn .Her friends were a motley crew and when u see this growing up,u have a short view of whose good and who isnt.At my state of life,Iam trying to gather decent people around me,which isnt a easy task.I also had to cut many toxic folk out off my life,including relatives.Once you decide not to tolerate being a doormat anymore,get the help u need from non biased therapuetic arenas to build up yourself.We arent made to be alone,but its better to be alone with options vs with others who are not good for us
I think the gossiping thing is something we all do and it is not meant always to be malicious. I always try to make sure it is fair and balanced and with disclaimers. And I always make sure I mentioned that I've done XYZ myself so as not to make myself out to be superior.
It's possible!... But people can have the same interests ... and love the same music, etc ... they want to share ... find their loved one ... build a good ... real relationship ... just listen to your heart and do not let yourself be fooled and feel guilty. Hope to meet right and nice people. Thank you for your work! Good luck! 😊💕👌
It’s really sad because I got accused of being a narcissist, but watching this video the woman I love that just left me a week ago displayed 4 of these behaviors. Showered me with love and gifts from the jump (even though she was and is still married) she is separated, but for the first year and a half of knowing her she still lived with her ex and kids. This forced me to hold back a lot from her. She would guilt trip me because I was respectful about the marriage and I didn’t trust her 100%. Eventually this turned into her telling me about what her friends opinions of me (even though I never met them) so their opinions were based on the smack she’d talk about me. Lol, the irony. I’ve always believed that your relationship with someone should be between you and that person. I don’t need to poison my mind with others opinions. I want my decisions to be based on my information only. It’s sad because when I brought this up and told her that those were my values she would say that I hide my relationship with her from others... not true, it’s basically one of their business. My old school values don’t belong in this new world. Out of the 2 years and 4 months I knew her and talked to her, she lived with her ex for 1 1/2 years (still cook and clean for him) and somehow our slow progression was my fault? What?! She ended it. I’m done too, it hurts, but it’s time to move on.
It sounds like people who are nice in order to get their needs met/feel entitled to someone else’s time and energy for being nice. Have to set boundaries and be clear about expectations in that regard. Some people are nice but don’t take it personally if the energy is not matched. It’s case by case tho. I have a lot of interests and like to read so sometimes I get excited when I come across something that I think someone would like and can share a lot of info-it’s not from a place of trying to “love bomb”. I’ve had to often times preface by saying, I got really excited and came across this and thought you would also enjoy! I’ve had to learn it takes time to get to know people before I do that tho, ahaha, so I’ve refined my approach, those that know me accept the info and we can have really good convos about it and connect, but I share with no expectations.
Isn’t everyone manipulative but doing it either directly or indirectly? Being “nice” is a behavior that has endured because building trust is a good way of manipulating someone to do what you want. It doesn’t sound socially correct but everything we do has a purpose of trying to manipulate the environment to our advantage whether that be in the short term or long term.
Not everyone is manipulative only unhealthy person is this reminds me of when someone said everyone is racist.Some people are just nice not everyone has a secret agenda behind it.I know it's hard to believe if you experienced trauma I have trouble believing it.
I have a co worker who fits this description literally. Now, I try my best to be more professional towards her and put bounderies on our former friendship. She made me a monster to everyone I knew in the office. It was really terrible being her so-called friend. All the while, she was killing my reputation without my knowledge. Praying for her conversion 🙏🏻
Lovev's life true love Never die I know a great and powerful healer that can get back your ex or crua without delay Just forever within 48hours he helped me too immediately
This is amazing.. I am literally living this.. fell on tough times "friend" offered me her couch.. little did I know this was all a setup to try to make me her boyfriend.. lifes been hell due to the fact that I dont "cooperate"🤦🏾♂️ constant questions of where am I going?, why dont I give her attention? And stupid shit like always asking if I know where her misplaced items are knowing dam well I'm not home enough and have no clue. Any interaction they can get... fucking nightmare.
This was enlightening. I learned a lot. And also learned some ways in which I was dealing with things in dysfunctional ways, am gonna whoop my own ass also. Wow, this is what they should teach in school.
I have a person that is exactly like this. I have been distantsing myself away from them. I have sensed negative tones when I am around them. Thank God.
I had a friend about 5 years ago who was exactly like this. When I realized what he was doing, I dropped him. I don't need toxic people to make me feel bad, life is hard enough.
Did you try talking to them? Nothing wrong with ‘being’ toxic. But ‘staying’ toxic is inexcusable. Sadly, majority of our behavior is learned from the environment we grow up in rather than how we are born. I lost all my friends. Even my wife in my profile picture. It took a friend 2 months she was the sweetest person I ever met. Now my ex wife she had issues with her family and I gave up college to help her out in her country, she ended up taking her frustrations out on me, and eventually she got better and stopped doing that. But I was the same from start to finish and she saw I was a bad influence and dropped me. Then there’s my best friend since 8th grade, who father left him and his mom’s boyfriends used to abuse him. It messed him up so bad and I seriously wanted to help him. But after 15 years and all his research and videos like this, he came up with the conclusion I’m some master manipulator who took advantage of him. I’ve never been violent and the only time I shown my teeth was when he was addicted to drugs and I wanted him to just stop. He used to beat me up and I never defended myself. It used to make him so perplex and so confused why won’t I put my hands up? Why won’t I swing back. Why did I look at him that way? Obviously it was all a ploy, right? To make myself out to be a victim? You’ll think I know all these answers but I really didn’t, and when I lost my last and final friend...someone who was good to me... the event fucked me up really bad. I cry all the time. I watch movies and I laugh/cry/get angry... I know I’m not deprived of empathy or emotions so why do I keep losing friends? I’m not toxic... all I ever wanted was to stay friends and help them. Devote my life for them. Well I did seek help out of respect for her last request before she ended our friendship. Turns out I’m not a psycho or some narcissistic. I’m just some loner who really never learned how to properly behave. My mother is a narcissist, my sisters are borderline, and my father is too laid back and I adopted all of their personalities believing this is the way. I didn’t even know what I was doing was wrong. I didn’t try to hurt my friends or even manipulate them to do evil things, I just wanted them to stay my friend and I suffocated them, and I played the victim when they didn’t want to spend time with me. All the answers I thought I had, switched, and I realized that even though some of my friends were toxic too... so was I. Christmas passed and everything I learned about myself is useless to them. I wish I could tell them I’m really sorry. I didn’t know any better. Growing up I was an outcast thanks to Adderall from my ADHD. The way I act is all I see in tv, movies, and animations. The way I behavior when things don’t go the way I act was how my family acts. Ultimately, yeah I was toxic but it took a good person ending our friendship for me to get help for me to seek a psychologist. The bottomline is: if I didn’t seek help... I would probably kill myself. And if I feel this, so do many others... I think a good portion of people who do end up killing themselves have felt the same way I felt months ago. Pushed away, unwanted, confused, and just lonely. The reason I didn’t seek help before was because I thought my behavior was okay; after all, those that told me my behavior was okay never apologized for hurting me.
@@suzeray87 thank you for sharing your experience. I wish you a kind and gentle recovery and new good friends. You have helped me understand someone I used to be friends with much better
@@suzeray87 I'm glad you got help. And all the people in the comments here get off on calling people "narcissists", I guess it makes them feel better about themselves. I'm sure they would have considered you a narcissist, even though you're not! They would call you "evil", or a "piece of sh*t " and then wonder why people with mental illness dont seek help..... and most of these people are self-proclaimed "empaths". HA! What a load of crap!
@@Benjy86 schadenfreude... it’s pleasure derived by someone from another person’s misfortune. It’s different from watching someone slip on ice and fall, then laughing about it. It’s more like watching someone you dislike slip and break their leg, then feint concern while feeling joy like he got what he/she deserves. Take movies for example. Most people love action movies. Hero vs villain. Epic conclusion of the movie ends with villain getting what is coming to them and it’s soooo enjoyable! But people apply that to real life, especially in social justice. We all believe in something. We all believe we are good. When there’s someone or something that contradicts or opposes our views or ideals, then we trigger our stress response fight or flight because they MUST be evil. Online nobody runs away, because they believe there are no consequences that’s why TH-cam and Facebook is a cesspool of truly heinous people that get pleasure of other’s misfortune only because they “got what was coming to them.” When our fight or flight response kicks, we stop listening and start arguing and start blaming, because any self-responsibility or self-doubt is DEFEAT!! As long as the fight ends with you still believing in what you do, then victory is achieved. Thats just how our minds work. A true empath is a Good Samaritan. You can tell a lot about someone by how they treat their enemies.
@@evezazzle5974 I’m never going to have friends again.
And they NEED to know your every move and all your business so they can take over your life and call it being a great friend and they don’t take NO for an answer like BULLIES
They won't let me have any privacy either .
Definitely bullies who want to control you. Then they get offended or angry when you tell them you want to do things differently. They attempt to manipulate you threw emotional control. Then you may start to feel you need to have their approval for certain things... Those covert narcissists are hard to spot. They come across as so nice at first- (love bombing) and act like they have your best interest at heart! 😑 I’m glad Im narc free now👍
Barbara Banks 1 Amen NARC FREE from a partner since 2018 but I just got rid of a so called friend that was OVERT 2019 she had to go it was very very hard to get rid of her she still don’t know why she just thinks I am wrong oh well
soaring feather I cut ties with a narc friend in 2017. (Before I understand what a narcissist was) I had bought something for myself, and found myself worrying what she would think of it. That scared me and I thought, why is her approval so important to me? I didn’t realize (at that time) I was being covertly manipulated and controlled. It’s kinda embarrassing for me to talk about it. But, there it is. I’m just grateful for TH-cam. They have a lot of valuable info on here. Like Dr. Ramani. If you haven’t heard of her, she’s a psychiatrist and educator on narcissistic abuse. She’s excellent.
Barbara Banks 1 you are not alone or crazy or insecure 🙏🏽
To be honest I’ve noticed I do a lot of these things mentioned and I’m honestly just looking to be better, thank you!
Good luck!
Man i do some of this as well but there is a part of me that doesnt want to use people... i just really want to be happy man
That is the thing, genuinally good and nice people are in danger of b eing falsely categorized. That is why the sense we have of a person [you know that feeling that you can get that somehow, what is being said/done doesn't feel genuine? That is the key! you be you, don't let someone's understanding of a certain personality type shape the way you think and are. We still need geuinely nice people. =)
If you have the strength to see it, you have the strength to overcome it. Many of us who have learnt these toxic behaviours at a young age, are good people albeit somewhat (or even very) misguided. If we keep nurturing the desire to be wholesome, decent human beings, we will eventually get there. You can do this, Madeleine and Florent! :)
i think we all do...self awareness/correction is a gift to humanity lol.....
6 behaviours of manipulative people who pretend to be nice.
1. They play the victim.
2 . Love bombing(excessive love show in short period of time ).
3.They use your weakness against you.
4 They make you feel guilty.
5.They pretend to have same likes as you .
6.They gossip about people to you.
My next door neighbor did this. Has now spread gossip about me. Lies btw. A smear campaign. Pretends to be so scared of me has got the other neighbors to make sure I don't hurt her. She's next door. A nasty evil person.
@@lonerhappy I had a neighbour just like that. Her name was Annette.
Zena Gray -what did you do?
@@lonerhappy I won in the end. I can't advise you what to do as all situations are different and it was not just me she attacked in the block.
Just remember she can't work alone. She's a coward basically who has to have back up. Keep your head up and maintain manners and dignity. Remember you are head and shoulders above her type have faith in yourself and the higher powers around you. Something will give in the end♥️♥️♥️
Oh they absolutely love to play the victim, they'll tell everyone that will listen what you done to them, but they won't tell people about what they done in the first place to make you react that way and boy do they like to slag people off behind their backs, but they'll be as nice as pie to their face! The kicker is that so many people get taken in by their bs, when all they deserve is a massive slap upside their head!
Yes...when my friend knows I'm angry with her because of her bs she plays the victim and makes up a story to try and win me back...pathetic! Need to get rid of her!!!
They are not good people, RUN.
EXACTLY. 🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️
Run. Leave! Dodge the BULLET.
My cousin does the “tell me info” but always uses it as AMMO-a lying WITCH.
Its okay if both partners thinks differently but as long both opinions can be compatible, moral and fair for everyone.
But if is not compatible and always me me me me because I'm always right and your not... that's very immature and creates Toxic relationship which is better to run away.
You can't run if you're a minor and the evil genius is your parent.
A friend of mine was manipulating me so much and I didn’t even realise it. From the moment I stopped giving her so much attention, she ended the relationship and said I really hurt her.
Ellen B,Your lovely smile 😊 can make the news!
Good for you Ellen!
Lol....her loss!
I will probably get the same reaction from a current friendship if I try the same thing with my friend. They are going to tell me I'm very offensive and then I will understand that I can't be their friend any more. Said friend gets offended if I withdraw myself from her just to have time to myself if I don't justify verbally why I'm getting my own space away from her. I suppose I'm starting to realise that this is her way of controlling me because she can't control her own life. I respect other people when they need their space, so I feel I deserve the same in return if I need my own space.
Good riddance!
That's always a big red flag for me, the love bombers... when someone is over complimentary I get suspicious and my guard goes way up.
Trust your gut 💪. I used to think most people are well intentioned like myself, but I learned the long and the hard way, now I have my walls way up just like you. I also limited my "good deed" intake and focus on myself first (even though that used to sound selfish) and afterwards what I am able for others. Sometimes kindness is signal for abusers to take advantage; or more often used by abusers to reel you in to trust them as bait. It makes it hard to know if Anyone is genuine nowadays. .. just sayin :/
Ever see how they react when you start to keep your distance? Basically letting them know that you see through their mask. They lose it.
@@Swisstriplet Or when you’re uncertain about something. Often times you question them, because you think “maybe I’m misunderstanding”? Or “what am I mistaken on” ?- You just want clarity between you and the other person (or group). But if they lose it, and begin to belittle you and start the smear campaigns against you-
That’s when you begin to realize; you’re not dealing with empathetic, rational human being(s). They seek dominance, and control over you and others. This is not love.
@@leahc9695 I agree with you- however, it doesn’t sound selfish to love and protect yourself. “Love thy neighbor as thyself”... A part of love is self protection. When we learn what good boundaries are; we also reflect on our own words and behaviors. Good boundaries is not just protecting ourselves from others, but protecting others from ourselves. Our human nature wants to fight back when insulted. These natural impulses are best resisted and walking away is best. (going no or low contact) ... But yea! Listen to your gut- God doesn’t want us to be a doormat for others! And willingly allow people to use us. That would be enabling bad behaviors of others- it’s not good for you; OR for them either.
Its God given insight/intuition that gives us warnings about those who are attempting to take advantage of us in some way. Trust what God has given you. And protect yourself! 🥰☺️❤️🙏
@@Barbara_Banks_1 I know now it doesn't (or shouldn't) sound selfish, but that's what I was deeply indoctrinated through orthodox religion since a kid and toxic family... It's been only more recent times I learnt that, but it's been quite hard to change, as there is a feeling of guilt and feel almost evil for that. But it's been around under 2 years since I was trying to change that and I can start to see the benefits of that. Take care ❣️
The sad things is you only realize that they are manipulative and narcissistic when it's too late, because we all over look these signs in the beginning. What I'm reading is what I went through after I was replaced by someone else.
Trying to move on from this toxic person too. I’m afraid that they might do something to me like hurt me yet they never made any threats. What should I do?
@@metalrockstarizer89 just stay no contact to be honest i was afraid of narcissist when he came to my job to hoover, but they are really cowards just keeping ignoring them that breaks them down.
Unfortunately my son has met a young girl who has these traits, on the rebound from another basket case who he supported for three years. She is as cunning as a fox she duped me for a short while but fortunately I've dated complicated women in the past I picked up on it very quickly. She has even managed to turn my son against me but unfortunately for this vixen she is dealing with a wolf I am systematically breaking her down and I'm able to predict her every move, trying to pry him away from her is a very different story. My son is very handsome she even said some one said he was punching above his weight 😂she is the one that's punching but she has to go as her mind games are detrimental to his well being.
Yup. Pay attention to the beginning.
They can apologize but then keep doing it because you speaking up is showing them what hurts you and their apologies are there way of getting away with it.
An apology with no change isn't an apology!
Yes now to cut the friends out of my life today. They called me sexist just because I was busy
True. There is a way to stop it. Say that you don't accept apology. Because you're doing the same.
There is Nothing Worse than someone being false to you .
Avoid contact with narcissists at all costs. If you have to live with them in your life, limit contact and don't believe the nasty things they say about you.
Yup! Narcicism is evil! Jesus doesn't like it just like he hates all other sins! Leila, God bless you!
I agree 💯. But remember, women are Narrissast also. I love animals. people not so much. But, I cry when my dog died at the age of five. He was my best friend. He took a chunk of my heart with him. I still have his ashes because I don't want to let go of him.
@@buddywilliams5650 I'm sorry about your dog 😑 Animals bring us so much joy and they leave a void when they leave. I hope you will be able to move on and find happiness, while keeping the nice memories in your heart.
With those trying to turn people against you let them talk themselves into revealing who they are. People get sick of hearing negative things constantly.
“They defend themselves by saying that they’re just trying to help you out” that one hurt
They're not helping anybody out Eliana That's for dog gone sure!
I've just washed my hands with some of these types of people and when I confronted them about their behaviour you've guessed it they played the victim 🤦🏻♂️
7. Gaslighting
"I haven't said/promised that."
"You did say so."
"I have said otherwise." (although they haven't)
"I don't remember."
"You remember wrongly."
"You are too sensitive." (when calling them out for their abuse)
"Stop playing the victim." (esp. when being confronted with their own obnoxious behavior)
"You are being ridiculous." (when addressing a serious issue)
"Everybody knows that you are stupid/silly/insane/whatever."
"Not my fault."
"It's your fault."
"That has never happened."
"Stop blaming _me_ for _your_ problems/issues/mistakes!" (They do know that they have blundered, but they cannot admit that!)
"You are making this up." (although you definitely aren't)
"You must have misplaced that." (after they have deliberately placed said item somewhere else)
"Told you!" (when they definitely haven't)
"Stop twisting the words in my mouth!" (when, in fact, they are the ones doing it)
"You don't know what you are talking about." (esp. when you are calling bullcrap on them)
"You deserve it." (after yet another round of abuse)
etc. pp.
This is one of their favorite (if not *the* favorite) tactics to keep you in a constantly confused state so that you are eventually questioning your own perception, which makes it particularly insidious.
This is used to level the ground for further, more destructive abuse, because once you are completely unsure about what's really going on, you have a hard time spotting their evil machinations.
This one is particularly devastating as it can cause serious damage to your cognitive functions.
@Eliana Sampson saying these things doesnt make you a narcissist. People tend to call all of their exes (or anyone they dont get along with) "narcissists" nowadays, especially women. The reality is narcs only make up 1% of the population. Relax, if you are trying to better yourself, you're not a "narcissist".
@@Benjy86 wrong 1 out of 10 have NPD, by early 90's estimates. Also one doesn't have to meet the criteria for NPD to be considered a narcissist. Albeit, I agree with you it's become a cliche term as awareness is spread.
I say the same about PTSD, the majority of people wearing it like a gold star, haven't a clue what it is. Partly to blame is misdiagnosis; but most are self-diagnosed. It's really insulting to those that suffer severe nerve pain of the infliction. But, I'm digressing.
Just because someone his a serial cheater, or a violently abusive person, doesn't mean they are a narcissist. It could be one of many disorders. On that, I too am sick of the mislabeling...most likely by people with uncheck mental issues of their own.
Stop playing the victim.
@@Star17venus I dont know where you get your information from, but it's actually an estimated 0.5%. Look it up. And no, you cant just go around calling people narcissists who dont meet the criteria for a NPD diagnosis. That's the whole reason the word has lost all meaning! Saying that 10% of the population are narcissists is pure conjecture and speculation.
U have given all the point which they use to tackle. A big salute to u .thanks for putting in detail
When they only apologise because your upset not because they have seen what they have done wrong. Just so they can feel better about themselves and tell themselves they tried.
I think we all have had this experience with someone we know in our lives.
Amen Angela!!
Yes more and more of the narcissist in all of us is being brought out!
Indeed
My mom eww ahahaheheohho heh 💀💀💀
@@muslimwarrior9891 i love you and I pray for you to heal dear one. 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🥰❤️🩹
That's the definition of nice. One hand forward with a smile, the other hidden and ready to strike.
The Narcicists have the wrong kind of nice!
@@matthewmeno5279 yep. To them it's currency without kindness.
Give them a bitter experience for to remember you forever.I'm lucky that these type people never gets click with me and I'm not afraid to confront them and fire them if needed.
me too
I agree ! They're users & nasty !
Many managers are these people.
I am actually planning to do this to someone. I won't be doing anything illegal or unethical but she's not going to like it and I'm not going to write her a letter like I'm tempted to do. I'm tempted to write a letter explaining why I'm doing what I'm doing but I know what happens when you do that. It just keeps the contact going and you have to listen to more lies and nonsense. There's no point explaining these things to somebody who is just horrible. It just doesn't do any good
I mean yeah, they'll tell everyone you're a bad person regardless, just actually be evil to them
This is 100% true. I deal with a person like this everyday while at work. They can and will literally drain your energy. But now, I know exactly how to deal with this person.
Felt same at work place.. Even tried to contact with any counsellar..
Unfortunately I have encountered so many people like this and I will say it hurts when you realise that what your gut feeling thought is actually right..Sad that this happens when you don't deserve it.
Thank you for this video.
Gossipers, friends or family
Never open up to them, they feed off of drama
Even if you don't like the person they are talking about do not commiserate or agree ,as they hey are not your friend. Resist the urge to flap your tongue with them,walk away, go do something else, and bless them. Don't hate them, but don't likewise trust, confude in them or try to make them your friend.
Hating leads to obsessive thinking about the hated one and you really don't want them taking up too much space in your thoughts.
WHEN THEY GOSSIP TO YOU THEY ARE MORE LIKELY TO GOSSIP ABOUT YOU. SOMETIMES HOWEVER IF IT STAYS BETWEEN YOU TWO THAT IS GOOD. BUT NOW THAT I KNOW THE WAY SHE USED ME FOR MONEY, NOW I CAN'T TRUST HER ANYMORE SO IF SHE WANTS TO STAY NEAR ME, SHE IS GOING TO HAVE TO FLIP BACKWARDS TO EARN HER TRUST
Ok I fell into the gossip trap and she told,she also asked for money on multiple occasions and I haven’t known her a year.she come and dump all her problems on me I felt horrible
It's so true. These people all have their names. Narcissists, Sociopathic narcissists. The ones your talking about playing the victim. Are definitely 'Covert narcissist'. They're the invidious ones. The worst.
My sister.
If I say ANYTHING at all about me, she will turn it around and make it about her
My sister.
If I say ANYTHING at all about me, she will turn it around and make it about her
@@melshaw264 that's kinda messed up to say about another human being, and shows how uneducated you are on the subject. ACTUAL narcissists (which are fairly rare, only 1-2% of the population) aren't "evil".. they have developed poor coping skills due to abuse and past traumas. But hey, I'm sure youre just a perfect little angel, huh?
True
We don't need Covert 19, just like we don't need Covid 19!
Yeah because it's ALL about them ,ALWAYS.There is no room for or actual interest for anyone else except themselves.
Toxicty at its WORST.....
Thank you for this valuable information. There are many people like this in the world and we don't need them in our lives.
Yes so many. In fact 99.9% of the population are manipulating.
If you really read into it, I feel like these are the secret plot points to many rom/coms over the last 20 years where the guy is trying to pursue the girl or vice versa. So as people watch these things, their subconscious mind picks it up and they in turn start to think this is how people engage with each other so it must be normal. Since these 6 behaviours are always in a narcissistic person's arsenal, it makes me really wonder if the narcissistic person had such a poor family life growing up that they turned to T.V for guidance and ended up unintentionally learning how to effectively manipulate people. Just my 2 cents.
Wow, deep and unusual insight
I imagine you're correct. The more other people do it the more likely it's seen as normal. Monkey see monkey do
INTERESTING POINT BUT IT ALL BOILS DOWN THAT PARENTS GRANDPARENTS DID NOT INTRODUCE GOD ENOUGH OR AT ALL AND THAT IS HOW SATAN IS RIPPING FAMILIES APART'
You just described a friendship I’ve withdrawn from for all these points! I went on instinct after a while of feeling unsettled / not at peace, but you’ve clarified verbally why I was feeling that way. Thanks!
Google narcissism and study up!
I work with a lot of people like this. When you were in the room they can't love you enough but the moment you walk out of the room they can't hate you enough and start talking about you.
I’m witnessing the temper tantrums of a control freak right now and when I tell you its childish n hilarious because I hear these outbursts from time to time that are implied towards me simply because I am a lone wolf and REFUSE to be controlled
"Wolves are highly social animals that live in packs, but not all wolves stay with the same pack their entire lives. This, however, doesn’t mean they prefer to be alone.
Young adult wolves who end up leaving the pack they were born into usually do so to form a pack of their own. That’s a big difference here - lone wolves don’t leave because they want to stay alone, they leave in order to find a mate, their own territory, and form their own pack."
Wolves mate for life and have strong social and family bonds. A lone wolf has really low chances of survival and the mainbreason a wolf TEMPORARILY hangs alone it's because it left his original pack (family) and is now looking for a partner to start a new pack (family). Some wolves also become really depressed after the death of their partner and can choose not to remain in the pack and wander around until their death.
Lone wolf here too. We need to team up
have one manipulator friend for several years. He is doing all the exact stuff that the video tells . I'm so glad that i gave him up and start building a healthy friendship!
This is hard bc people who are truly suffering are victim blamed on top of it but manipulative, dominant people will mostly get what they want in terms of support.
I learned that I am not the type who can be manipulated easily or be a manipulator. That is the best of me. It comes with time and wanting to be mature.
I'd honestly love a video on how to safely and peacefully live with manipulators, because some of us are forced to. It causes so much distress and anxiety. Especially when you are deemed an easy scape goat.
That's a good idea, and I hope we'll see such a vid soon. From a lay person's perspective, though, there really isn't a way to live safely and peacefully with manipulators (narcissists) because everything you do to try to cope with them is fuel for them -- everything. You can’t live in harmony with someone who’s trying to destroy you. That’s the reality. The fact that you are there at all is what enables them to weaponize every aspect of your existence against you. While being safe and at peace isn't an option, there are many standard ways to reduce distress and anxiety, such as gray rock (non reactive behavior or modified gray rock if you have kids together or a business). Distance yourself from them as much as possible. Of course, if you can afford it, meet with a counselor who's highly qualified in narcissistic abuse. Careful to vet the person with specific questions about his/her experience and qualifications as many if not most of them are clueless about NPD. I've seen videos on the Internet on how to select a good analyst and how to cope with a manipulator. The more you know about manipulation the better you’ll be able recognize it before it happens and take steps to avoid being victimized. Read good books on the subject, and check out videos online. Finally, there are a few highly qualified lawyers knowledgeable on divorcing a narc. It may be possible to go no contact and begin to heal.
Yes.andcthey play on and are masters of playing upon any real ,genuine feelings they get from you.They take total and full advantage of anything good and are pros at the art of blowing smoke up your ass and being fake.
Thanks u so much for this video
@@jolly7728 ultimate reply thanks for clarifying me too 😇👌🙌
There are tons of videos on TH-cam.
If you can't avoid contact with narcissists at all costs, then you need to develop a way to protect your inner self by not believing what they say to you so they won't be able to hurt you and weaken your self-esteem.
It's best if you can limit or avoid contact.
Thanks Beyond Blue this is what my narcissistic father does love bombing, bullying, neglect, silent treatment, gaslighting, double standards, playing victim, instigating fights with me, takes advantage of my kindness and empathy.
They “like” all over your FB page to try to establish fake closeness.
Soo true, keep exposing these psychopaths, attention seeking toxic, chattering, poisonous individuals!!
The saddest part of my life knowing and completely awakened since when I was a child that my Dad is a manipulator and narcissistic person. I still love him even he's like that because he's my Dad.
I feel for you. Even when our parents do bad things, like, it’s still your dad
when you give your love to someone just because they happen to share dna, your love is cheap.
Don't love someone who betrayed you , manipulated you done you wrong don't care if their your friend family member mother ,dad , parents grandparents it a hell no
@Caleb D not at all. i've been there. the morally right choice is to stop enabling abusers, even if it means we have to do without dna-sharers in our life. the more people love and support them, the more people they can get away with hurting. we have a responsibility.
so many think they are "nice" and martyr themselves "loving" abusers.. when really that's only "nice" to perps. it's nasty and hateful toward their victims. it's time to be 'nice" to the victims for once. and kind is a better word for that.
I had some experiments. That's a classmate in high school. At the very first time, she showed how mature, reliable and kind she was, yah and i appreciated and cherished her so much. Story began when we were getting closer, she talked about my weakness in front of people. I told her she could make suggestions, but she didn't. Take advantage of me :) yolo and still call me best friend :) huh?
My ex would use his knowledge about my weaknesses to embarrass me in front of others. It was his way of getting me to say the right things about him when we were with friends or family.
Good video. Thanks for sharing. Have a blessed day, and yes this video describes someone that have narcissist personality disorder. These people are draining to be around, and they can be dangerous to be around as well. Be careful if you encounter these type of people including family members.
This describes my workplace and one of the reasons I am bullied often...thanks for sharing this video and I can relate a lot to what these type of people can do to an innocent person
They also excuse their shitty behavior as being a “prank” or a “joke” when in reality it’s extremely far from it. They will say you’re being sensitive, even go as far as saying they’re “looking out for you” in some situations, they won’t let you get away from any past situations that you’ve grown up from or moved on from, slander your name and those that you are close to trying to cause a rift between you, and if they know you, are stalking you or used to know you, any little thing they can blab about you or exploit because they think you’re insecure about it, they will. That doesn’t sound like a prank or a joke to me, it’s malicious manipulation and someone who is trying to cause major damage in your life. They could have everyone on earth fooled, just don’t let them fool you.
Great job getting this info out there so people and defend themselves from these devils. In philosophy, egoism posits that all behaviors are motivated by self-interest. It suggests that everything we do or say is intended to benefit ourselves. When such behavior goes to the extreme and manifests as deceitfulness, that's when we need to run away from manipulators as fast as we can and never look back in our own best interest.
Well said
But if we all walked away from those who did us wrong, then acting in self-interest would mean acting with good morality. In this way, either altruism or complete selfishness both look the exact same in practice. That is how a healthy World works.
Time for us to make it very not worth it for others to act nasty.
1) they play the victim.
2) love bombing ( showers you with gifts, love)
3) use your weakness against you.
4) they make you feel guilty.
5) they pretend to have the same likes as you.
6) they gossip about people to you.
7, they accuse you of many things, like selective hearing!
Each narcissist You met is a resource to study more about narcissists and know their weaknesses. Prepare you more in the future. They are giving themselves away very easily, they are so bad at hiding, so each time You are becoming stronger. 😎
Wise words,may god bless all people of good heart 🙏❤️
Thank you for your comments. You reminded me of a perspective that I try to maintain with manipulators, or any event in my life that can be challenging to face, yet deeply rewarding to get through. When I noticed other people diving head first into negativity and gossip I run the other way and ask myself a question: What did I learn from this? How can it benefit me and possibly others?
Everyone is a narthathisth. 🤪
A little vague a lot of people are like this, they never get anywhere with me,my friends call me to route them out.
I have a radar for them. They can't fool me so easily. ✌✌👍👍dangerous.
I'm 40 and just got manipulated...I feel sad that ppl I care for got hurt because of me being naive
😊THEY R THE ONES U REALLY HAVE TO WATCH. BE NICE AND RIP YOUR HEART OUT JUST FOR PLEASURES.
Since the lockdown some of my friends have been snappy and short tempered,their true colours have come out
You guys rock. I know people like that and they know I know. I will put that person in check so fast they will spin around in circles and they stay far away from me.
Hahaha, I was gaslit, manipulated, and love bombed and I didn't even realize it🙃
I am for death penalty for the narcissists...
With these SOB's it does not take long for their mask to fall off. Be calm when you see it and begin to distance yourself and never give them an ace.
I’m actually surprised because all of these traits match up to the ones that all of my past fake friends had... 😳
Absolutely describes a family member. Wow
I’m currently experiencing this with a friend and, unfortunately, music partner. To anyone going thru this; I’m sorry. And I know how much it hurts to realize this about someone you thought was in your closest circle, but you need to get them out. Easier said than done, as I haven’t even pulled the trigger on this yet, but just know I’m in your corner when you do it.
It happened to me too with a vocalist who I met and befriended because they wanted a drummer for their band.
I just called them out on their shit as soon as I realised what was going on. They had a temper tantrum and made the mistake of trying to turn people against me with really absurd lies that everyone knows are ridiculous.
It was a bit chaotic for me to deal with temporarily, but ultimately they exposed their manipulative tendencies to a lot of people and basically ruined things for themselves. The rest of the band quit and the other musicians in our area know to stay the fuck away from this person now.
Wishing you all the best in your life. Thank you for your kind words 🤗
We're rooting for you too!!!
@@ashlillyvictoria3395 smear campaign.. I’m glad it all worked out for you, that gives me hope 🙂
There so many people like this in my neighborhood .
@Google Account.. OMG
@@Ajithchandran1985 👍
@@Ajithchandran1985 yup
Leave that neighborhood!
Most manipulative and toxic persons can appear very nice especially in the beginning of the relationship and that makes it more complicated to see the red flags because we don't want to believe that these "nice" people are not what they pretend they are even when it is claire that they have abusive behaviours that are harmful to us. Those I met were very kind to me but only when I do or behave the way they wanted but they abuse me the very first moment I was not doing what they want anymore that is when I discovered that their love were conditional. I think one Clair sign of a toxic person is a "two face". Someone who shows a particular behaviour at first to make you at ease but change personality in other occasion.
I’m dealing with someone like this now. I’ve noticed the game because my last relationship was like this. It’s a lot of narcissism🤦🏾♀️ I will not lose myself
Yes 💯 right on the money. I'm living with a house of manipulators. Thanks for the confirmation
I think it's so important to note that we can all portray some of these characteristics some of the time. It worries me how easy labels are being banded around these days. We are all human. The most important thing for me, is to see how people react to criticism and whether people are willing to work on themselves. That's a sign of a decent human being to me. It seems like so many people want to be accepted, flaws and all, but if someone else displays any "red flag" behaviour then OH MY GOD - THEY ARE TOXIC and a NARC. It's ridiculous. No wonder so many people have shit relationships these days. The difference between real prolonged manipulative abuse and being a bit of a dickhead human being at times is huge. It really takes away from people who have suffered extreme abuse. Just like everyone has anxiety and depression these days. I highly beg to differ.
Absolutely agree.
Yeah! Thank you for saying this.
I hear ya. I started thinking hey I'm desiring to be growing as a human and be working on being good in the moment and shoot hopefully I got a right motive .. Yet sometimes hey I start critiquing myself though I know initially it was good but I'm thinking this has GOT to be people who are really blind or outwardly being sheeplike but inwardly don't care or are running so busy they are on auto pilot but because they are busy they don't stop to regroup so they doing a show.... Yeah I can see where this or these people can be as fake but they just got to recenter and really hear whoever they feel like they were helping out in an outer show and really help by listening. Allot of people need a listening ear and also point blank facts, directions, anger the how to "fish".... How to's and to get up. I know if we tell someone accidentally that we helped someone that's different but doing things in front of people to be seen by people or any thing like that we do eventually grow out of because we mature up and don't care if someone thinks we are genuinely good or not. Especially strangers. Who cares? Only our circle, family friends we hope really gets healed, fixed, whole and if they are well and then the reach out to others.... Sometimes we can reach out to others because we must let go of ones in our heart in an outer way so we breathe in good harmony and even fit them it may be more harmonic as well. These videos I think get us thinking.... At least I did one day when I was thinking hey what if I am this type of person or that type?!??? I enjoy psychology type talks and so I was yeah let me make sure this is really being checked out. If only it was an obvious thing. I've heard some people don't even know they are. But "motives". I guess the best motive about anything was our intelligent designer's. Take care neighbor
Couldn't agree more
ohh someone with a brain thanks god
Omg 😳 this is so true smh I’ve been played so many times in the past 🤦🏾♀️
This is a great video, thanks a lot for making it. I have fallen a victim of such a person for 10 years. He's always lying, cheating and blames me for his actions, because I call him a liar. He started manipulating his friends, family and even to the point of dating my friends daughter and still denying it. He turned all these people against me.
He's married but he will be talking to all his exs and about 10 different women around the clock.
He feels threatened by me because am the only person on this planet that knows him deep down.
I'll block him and he will show up at my door and start love bombing.
I finally made up my mind not to block him but not to pick his calls or answer his texts. He finally dropped me a text asking me for a favour and I answered "sorry but I can't" and I haven't heard from him ever since (for a while).
It is the most evil and toxic place I've ever been in my life for ten good years. He always wants me to prove his acts, otherwise they are false accusations but I know that he will never change. The difficult part is that the other women buy into his manipulation.
It takes time but you can also heal.
Spot on, it’s really creepy.
Love bombing.. Showing so much love for so little time period. This i have suffered from and i can understand better now. Never again will i allow myself fall to this tactic. Thank you for the video.
I feel like I sometimes am unintentionally manipulative.
Hi! Is that true? Could you explain a little about what you mean? Thank you 💕
I know someone exactly like this! A frenemy lol. She's extremely jealous of me and always has to one up me because she can't stand that I have good things going on in my life! I'm very aware of her manipulation and I'm looking forward to getting rid of her for good!
I was unintentionally manipulated, thanks for making these videos so I can be sure it won't happen again
Your profile name needs a change. 🙄
My father 101. Extremely manipulative and also a narcissist. His forte was always to make ppl feel guilty. Extreme insecurity as well. I could tell you stories from the years.
Sounds like my ex-husband. Pure NARCISSIST
Hey:).
I feel you...
Just something interesting I wanted to share with you.
Read a different interpretation of a "narcissist". Such a great article!
The whole point of it was that "narcissists" are actually extremely vulnerable, hiding their pain deep inside and HAVE to use some mask to not let people hurt them.
Somehow, this word shifted from exactly THAT description to what we use it for now.
So, I stopped thinking of "narcissist" as we are used to, and as for me it is easier to "label" a person (my ex) as a sociopath, maybe.
Google it if you'd like.
PS Narcissus, the beautiful young man, was suffering immensely in history's view on him.
:)
SOLOMEA QUINN I agree. He is the weakest broken soul I know. The compassion kept me hopeful and us together 35 years. The problem is he is a very dangerous and vindictive individual. There’s no room for that in anyone’s life. We can have love and compassion from a distance 🥰
TOTALLY MY GARBAGE EX-WIFE
Same here
I did get accused of acting like a victim alot. I told a friend about things that have happened to me in my life where I really believe I was in those situations. I also am guilty of telling a friend things people said behind his back but I do not believe my intentions were bad. I did have a bad experience trusting certain people and got burned and did not want the same thing to happen to my friend but I guess sometimes you have to let people figure it out on their own. I will definitely no longer do that.
You aren’t doing anything wrong. Trusting is not a bad thing, people just change or hide who they truly are. Moving forward pay attention to peoples mindsets, mentalities, actions and how they treat others. Also if someone tells u something about someone whether true or not, thread carefully with both because u don’t know who is fake or telling the truth. Or if 3 or more people tell u something similar about someone there’s usually some truth to that so u choose how to thread with them or if u should even be friends. Know what to share with who about yourself or others. But no matter what you do people will be people as humans could be viscous no matter how much u set boundaries. People are comfortable in being trashy and usually are just project bur in whatever you do stay true to yourself and others and do everything with pure intentions. Just LIVE life in true peace and happiness and build a thick skin to backlash because if u feel like u tell things about people, someone somewhere is doing the same somewhere about u, that’s just life that we can’t control
My entire family. No Contact for 4 years & they keep trying to Hoover me back.
I'm going through this right now
Proud of you.
Blessings.
Peace
excellent video...
dealing with a group of manipulative narcissist...
you must cut them off completely and not even speak too them at all...
they will as well attempt to make you dependent on them...
so they can attempt too stay in contact as well...
III
This fits my ex..and a few others I've unfortunately known. Common to run into these types these days 👎👎
That's sounds like my ex friend's,they're
definitely all this...A manipulative frenemies too. Is why'd I'm loner. and single too. It definitely helps being alone when I'm introverted girl too.
Thank you.
People who pretend to be nice are the worst
I liked this, I subbed. I'm a victim of a dysfunctional violent narcissistic family. They tried to make me feel guilty about feeling awful just being in their presence. I left home at 17. I really should of disappeared and legally changed my last name at legal age. I got nothing but a fucking nightmare from being born into their bullshit!!
I CAN'T BELIEVE MY OWN BEST FRIEND HAS THIS TRAITS. SOMETIMES I SUSPECT BUT THEY ALWAYS FIND A WAY TO MAKE ME BELIEVE THAT THEY ARE GOOD PEOPLE . GEEZ
THIS IS SO RIGHT...I HAD TO LEARN...HOWEVER..I HAVE A SUSPICIOUSNESS ABOUT PEOPLE WHO ARE OVERLY NICE....
Right on!
I think my Family is like this !
Definitely met a few of these...
Seems like the story of my life.Unfortunately I grew up in a household with a mother who was manipulative,made bad choices in friendships and extremely stubborn .Her friends were a motley crew and when u see this growing up,u have a short view of whose good and who isnt.At my state of life,Iam trying to gather decent people around me,which isnt a easy task.I also had to cut many toxic folk out off my life,including relatives.Once you decide not to tolerate being a doormat anymore,get the help u need from non biased therapuetic arenas to build up yourself.We arent made to be alone,but its better to be alone with options vs with others who are not good for us
I think the gossiping thing is something we all do and it is not meant always to be malicious. I always try to make sure it is fair and balanced and with disclaimers. And I always make sure I mentioned that I've done XYZ myself so as not to make myself out to be superior.
It's possible!... But people can have the same interests ... and love the same music, etc ... they want to share ... find their loved one ... build a good ... real relationship ... just listen to your heart and do not let yourself be fooled and feel guilty. Hope to meet right and nice people. Thank you for your work! Good luck! 😊💕👌
It’s really sad because I got accused of being a narcissist, but watching this video the woman I love that just left me a week ago displayed 4 of these behaviors. Showered me with love and gifts from the jump (even though she was and is still married) she is separated, but for the first year and a half of knowing her she still lived with her ex and kids. This forced me to hold back a lot from her. She would guilt trip me because I was respectful about the marriage and I didn’t trust her 100%. Eventually this turned into her telling me about what her friends opinions of me (even though I never met them) so their opinions were based on the smack she’d talk about me. Lol, the irony. I’ve always believed that your relationship with someone should be between you and that person. I don’t need to poison my mind with others opinions. I want my decisions to be based on my information only. It’s sad because when I brought this up and told her that those were my values she would say that I hide my relationship with her from others... not true, it’s basically one of their business. My old school values don’t belong in this new world. Out of the 2 years and 4 months I knew her and talked to her, she lived with her ex for 1 1/2 years (still cook and clean for him) and somehow our slow progression was my fault? What?! She ended it. I’m done too, it hurts, but it’s time to move on.
Oh thank you so much for the heartfelt concern of my life . I sure will watch my back. That's who has my back.
Darci Brown,You are absolutely gorgeous 🌷🌹,hope you are with a good man!
It sounds like people who are nice in order to get their needs met/feel entitled to someone else’s time and energy for being nice. Have to set boundaries and be clear about expectations in that regard.
Some people are nice but don’t take it personally if the energy is not matched.
It’s case by case tho.
I have a lot of interests and like to read so sometimes I get excited when I come across something that I think someone would like and can share a lot of info-it’s not from a place of trying to “love bomb”. I’ve had to often times preface by saying, I got really excited and came across this and thought you would also enjoy! I’ve had to learn it takes time to get to know people before I do that tho, ahaha, so I’ve refined my approach, those that know me accept the info and we can have really good convos about it and connect, but I share with no expectations.
Isn’t everyone manipulative but doing it either directly or indirectly? Being “nice” is a behavior that has endured because building trust is a good way of manipulating someone to do what you want. It doesn’t sound socially correct but everything we do has a purpose of trying to manipulate the environment to our advantage whether that be in the short term or long term.
Not everyone is manipulative only unhealthy person is this reminds me of when someone said everyone is racist.Some people are just nice not everyone has a secret agenda behind it.I know it's hard to believe if you experienced trauma I have trouble believing it.
This audio is fantastic! Very clear and spoken at a perfect speed and volume.
I have a co worker who fits this description literally. Now, I try my best to be more professional towards her and put bounderies on our former friendship. She made me a monster to everyone I knew in the office. It was really terrible being her so-called friend. All the while, she was killing my reputation without my knowledge. Praying for her conversion 🙏🏻
Lovev's life true love Never die I know a great and powerful healer that can get back your ex or crua without delay Just forever within 48hours he helped me too immediately
+=2=3=4=8=0=7=0=7=6=8=9=9=2.
Text him on WhatsApp
Same happened to me, how did you recover your reputation? I would assume people noticed at the end?
This is amazing.. I am literally living this.. fell on tough times "friend" offered me her couch.. little did I know this was all a setup to try to make me her boyfriend.. lifes been hell due to the fact that I dont "cooperate"🤦🏾♂️ constant questions of where am I going?, why dont I give her attention? And stupid shit like always asking if I know where her misplaced items are knowing dam well I'm not home enough and have no clue. Any interaction they can get... fucking nightmare.
This was enlightening. I learned a lot. And also learned some ways in which I was dealing with things in dysfunctional ways, am gonna whoop my own ass also.
Wow, this is what they should teach in school.
Same here. No more gossiping ever for me!
I have a person that is exactly like this. I have been distantsing myself away from them. I have sensed negative tones when I am around them. Thank God.
💥 PLAYING VICTIM - IS SUCH A HORROR
It’s like you know Vincent Meucci personally. That’s basically our everyday together. Like every day. Thanks so much for the video!
Most humans are broken from generational mindsets.. Maybe instead of labeling everyone over everything.. We could see most people need healing..
I’m very glad I watched this video 👌
Now I know , Number 4 is a common tactic used against me, it’s time to put a stop to this !