i love how HEALTHY this advice is!!! There are people on tiktok and even on podcasts that give relationship advice but its veryyyyy toxic and rooted in misogyny
I told the last guy I hooked up with that I needed someone more available, to hold me, to invite me over after a rough day someone who feels safe and home....he didnt really respond but was rather angry as i would not respond any more, so he was more interested in receiving my energy than actually being vulnerable with me, I was so glad I ended it early...💜
be proud of yourself for being honest and open with him from the beginning! that is a healthy habit to have, and I am definitely going to start implementing this into my life
You’re not gonna find that in a hookup first of all. Unfortunately for many of us who feel needy towards partners, we gotta learn that it’s not balanced energy to treat someone like a boyfriend before they are actually our boyfriend (ie loving and committed to us on some basic level)
Hitomi could you talk more about how you embraced and "overcame" your high sensitivity/triggers? I could totally relate to you on the office crumbs story and I want to learn how to respond in better ways instead of projecting/internalizing
This video is beautiful. My girlfriend and I watched it together and it partnered perfectly with many long conversations she and I have been having lately. It makes me so emotional to know that we have the privilege of living in a time where mental health and illness, emotional triggers, sensitivity, and safe space are acknowledged with such depth. Thank you so much, Hitomi, for sharing all that you are and creating a space for all beings to thrive and harmonize. Much love!
I have never been in a serious relationship because I always thought my expectations were too high, but this reassured me that what I'm asking for isn't that farfetched and everything happens in divine timing.
Yess I can confirm this! I was 19 when I never even had been intimate let alone sexual with someone, I thought something was wrong with me for not being interested in boys(or girls) in a sexual or romantic way, also thought I set the bar too high. But my patience defenitely paid off when I found my love who I can truly be my 100% self with and who makes me feel at home. Its more than I ever even dreamed of. I’m so glad I didn‘t settle for less:) (not saying relationships are only rainbows and sunshine because it can be hard especially when you have some trauma to work through but yes, this is also a beautiful learning space)
@@michelleamponsah7521 For me I began to look inwards for fulfillment rather than outwards. I started exploring all of my interests and passions that I had buried thinking they made me less desirable. I got more in touch with my emotions and shamed myself less for having them. I addressed past relationship traumas and my feelings around them, and tried to understand where exactly the pain I felt was coming from. I began to explore my creativity more with art, and learned to skateboard because I had wanted to since I was a child. I just began to accept myself and cultivate my interests and got to a point I was truly happy on my own. And then I attracted the right kind of attention and found someone who’s doing the same thing with their life. Whether or not you’re in a relationship it’s always important to focus on self fulfillment. Take time to do what makes you happy and pay attention to your inner child. For me the importance of my inner child lays in the fact that that was the last time I felt totally unashamed about my interests and play, was just myself, and explored the world with no preconceived ideas of how it should be. I hope that made sense, and good luck to you!
half way through watching this, i paused the video and begun opening up to my partner about something we've been struggling with for a year now... i shared and expressed from a respectful and balanced place, usually i'm overly emotionally charged talking about it because it triggers so much pain in my heart... it is still in process, but anyway, i had a big break-through last night, and it was definitely supported by how clear and affirming i felt when opening the doors to the hard stuff - so for that, i thank you hitomi x
This comes in such a perfect time, I just ended my almost 3-year-old relationship, it wasn't even a toxic relationship, but there were some things that I wouldn't take anymore, and I spoke about that several times but there was no change so I decided to leave, and this speaks so deeply to me at this moment, there are so many things I want to work and focus on myself to heal rn, Idk, I just love this video so much
Yes. And I finally found a partner who I can communicate with adequately. The moment something bothers me, we communicate and fix the problem. No gaslighting. No feeling guilty for talking things out. I’m literally going to marry this girl cause the little problems that arise, we figure it out so fast.
You always seem to post things at such the right time about the perfect topics. I’ve noticed myself growing at such a fast pace spiritually and I feel like my partner and I aren’t on the same level in this aspect, it’s always hard to let go and I’m not sure when I will but this video definitely helps me out a lot. I have some things to think about! Thank you so much.
I’m going through something similar, I’ve been with my partner for almost 4 years and now it’s becoming clear that I was dating based on a lot of projections and expectations, so seeing now that we might not be as aligned as I thought (and wish) we were really hurts. I still haven’t made up my mind about whether to stay or leave the relationship, but I’ve been thinking a lot
I went through this! we were together for over four years but i began to realize deep down i was no longer as invested in the relationship. The comfort of it all was what kept me attached- it actually took me several months to finally listen to my gut and break things off. I knew i wasn't truly happy anymore and the best thing you can do for your partner is to no longer ignore that. i learned to not be afraid of change or being uncomfortable because then you will BOTH get to where you're supposed to be much faster! hope this could help !!
When I listen to your videos, I take my journal out and write as you speak. You have such insight. I really appreciate and love your words. If you wrote a book, I would read it sis.
Hitomi, thank you for sharing about the importance of noticing and being mindful of your body. So relate to what you shared about your throat chakra! For a period of time, I knew I needed to end a relationship but couldn’t admit that truth, and I kept feeling like I was about to choke on food constantly. Once I spoke to this person about how I truly felt, I stopped having that choking sensation. Our bodies are so intelligent and speak to us all the time ❤️ thankful for your presence and truth!
A bit about communicating without fear: if there's something irking me a little bit in the relationship that keeps popping into my mind, I'll tend to take out my phone & record myself talking through the problem I have with said thing to figure out if it's something worth communicating to my partner or something I just need to let go of. Helps me reassure myself when I do find we need to have a discussion with each other.
I had a conversation this weekend with a really close friend of mine about just wanting to stay friends because I'm so happy by myself at the moment, that I don't want to be dating or be in a relationship. And he keeps trying to convince me but just slightly crossing the boundaries I set. Now I'm stuck in a weird place. I really feel like I needed to hear this and to know that I can and am allowed to feel like this and set my boundaries.
When you said “I want you to feel safe in my space” tears welled up from within🌊 maybe this is something I need to hear more💖 thank you for your magic & wisdom Hitomi🙏🏽
“We need relationship education in school…” I totally agree with this! I’ve talked as nauseam with friends/family about this many times when discussing sex ed reform (which I’m passionate about)! Consent and interpersonal skills are *soooooo* important and the idea that we (the US) have no national standard to teach for all to adhere to is so…🤯 to me 🤷🏽♀️
Something I've heard from a relationship counselor, is very similar to your 'speaking up immediately after you feel constricted' is: Maybe if your hot tempered and cant keep a cool head in a certain situation, take a deep breath, step away and write it down. It helps to calm your nerves as well as telling somebody (in this case your phone or notebook) about how you really feel. And then, most importantly, take your time once a week with yout partner to talk about what might've come up during the week. Speak openly and then things will not boil over. For example you ask eachother every sunday evening if they have anything to tell you, that might've bugged them. Hope that helps! :)
I probably had to pause a couple of times throughout the video simply because I needed a moment to process things and resonate with this level of self awareness and realization. I wish for everyone to be this evolved in their relationship choices. It can honestly make the world a better place.
To the person reading this: You are who you are. You are a gorgeous and beautiful creation. You are a masterpiece. You are who you are. You are strong and courageous. You can absolutely do it. You are powerful. Remind yourself that you are who you are. Move forward with your determination, and conviction. You can absolutely do it. Have a great day ahead, Remember you are who you are. ❤️❤️❤️
Just recently ended a 2+ years long relationship and recently stumbled upon your videos, Hitomi. I’m grateful I did because it came at the right time as I’m beginning my spiritual journey. Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and your journey with so many people. Your soul is beautiful and inspiring.
A little over a month ago I decided to commit to a new relationship which was (and still is) a really intense decision for me after the trauma I experienced in my last relationship. My intuition is very happy about this person and I am practicing complete honesty and discernment and my partner holds so much space for my growth, as I do for his. This was all so refreshing to hear and assured me that my partner and I are on the right path. Your words always seem to resonate so beautifully, Hitomi. Thank you!
I couldn't agree more with everything you said! You need to focus on yourself and love being present before looking for what you are missing in someone else.
i completely agree with the stuff said around 25:00 we shouldn’t be preaching that if you’re imperfect you’re not worthy of a relationship yet!! grow together and support each other!
i feel like everyone's relationship problems is they can't help but get into toxic relationships all the time and my relationship problems is I can't connect with people at all to begin with. Like at this point I wouldn't even mind a non-ideal relationship I just want to connect with someone.
@@sarahcoburn5870 Thank you, it’s nice to know it’s not just me ♥︎ Logically i know it’s not just me, but social media sure does make it seem like it is
@@JohnPorsbjerg yeah same, that's why I'm trying to limit my social media time but kinda finding it hard 😅 yeah like I've never had a long term boyfriend and I just find myself being intensely infatuated by certain boys but then it not working out because I can't emotionally connect with them even if I really like them :(
I’ve had a partner who told me I was “too complicated” & it helps so much watching vids like these to realise I’m not an anomaly, there r people just as complicated as me & that’s okay
I love her mindset, and she’s so beautiful! It’s interesting because I know she’s applying this specifically to romantic relationships but it’s definitely applicable to all relationships. I’m going through a spiritual awakening, if you will, currently and it’s making it really hard to have honest open relationships with anyone I know right now. I feel isolated and at first it was lonely, but I’m realizing I’m not alone because I have God. That makes you more powerful than anything, having your Angels and the universe or God in your corner. I’m heartbroken right now, but I won’t regress, this is a big learning opportunity and I have to face the pain of the process! We all can :) this video helped me reach so much clarity, thank you 🙏🏼 💛
Just a note that some of these online counseling services are particular about the kind of mental health struggles they are capable of assisting with. For liability reasons they often will not accept new clients that have more serious mental health struggles. Please be aware going into that! It can be hard to receive a rejection (from a therapy service no less lol) when you're already in a difficult space.
🪴YOU ARE GLOWING!! You radiate so much angel energy, thank you for blessing my life and being the big sister I never had. You have no idea how much you’ve healed me and helped guide me down the best journey of my life of self love 🪴
this video is so important to me and I feel so heard. I'm definitely the sensitive partner, finding myself crying at a lot of things that aren't meant to upset me, but equally I pride myself on being the partner to express my own needs and issues - communication is so important! I've found both validation and pointers to work on in this video, giving me a new perspective. thank you hitomi 💓 side note, you look so beautiful in this video (as always)!!!
i had a dream once i met you and we became friends and ever since then have felt such a connection to you and your words🤍you’re a blessing to this world and have taught me so much.
Just wanted you to know I took notes on this. Thank you for sharing!! I LOVE: "Every relationship is a teacher. Every person is God in disguise. Find the miracle." 🌿🌻
Hitomi “know thyself” is a valuable quote it’s all starts from within only then can you find a valuable partner. Look foward to having you on the podcast I emailed you about.
When Hitomi said that she had life-ending thoughts about not vacuuming something, that exact feeling and thought process is very applicable in my relationship now. I thought I was crazy for having that mindset but after a lot of inner work for myself, I understand that those thoughts came from an insecurity and much more. My partner (who is my first relationship ever and i am 22 yrs old) and I had a very rough patch last year because I was developing a lot of mental health issues. In addition, my partner didn't know how to handle me during my chaos. It was extremely hard because I lacked the skills and knowledge to navigate through my own thoughts& emotions- so how would I be able to express to my partner my wants and needs, when I didn't know what I needed?!. But with my own self-awareness and my partner's support, we're in a much better place. I want to note that I wasn't going through therapy and I think if I did have a therapist during this time, I would have saved my partner and me a lot of hurt and trauma. In essence, the man I'm with today is a huge blessing because I am constantly met with compassion and empathy. I know that every relationship is different but I wanted to share my experience on here to let someone know that even if you are in a healthy relationship, there is still healing that has to occur. As much as you think a relationship is the end goal, it's only the beginning towards healing deeper wounds you may have never noticed. It's a matter of putting in the work and showing up for yourself. And to constantly remind yourself that the reason why you want to be better, is to better for YOURSELF. Don't be better for your partner, be better for your own divine self and your partner should be an advocate for your growth because he/she/them would want you to thrive. Blessings, gratitude, and love to anyone whose read my comment.
this was the first video i ever saw by hitomi last spring. sometimes you need someone to shake up your foundations. this was truly the catalyst for me cutting the cord on my relationship and getting back to me 💗💗💗
OMG, this is THE video for life! Absolutely, must see, must watch, even when you went through somoething toxic, karmic, or something not good for you, but you still didnt go over it, you doubt yourself, or doubt the decisions. Im so thankful for You Hitomi even tho I found you just yesterday.. while listening to this, I'm in such peace with myself, at least for this moment.
This is such a mature and realistic, yet comforting perspective. I needed to hear something like this when I was struggling about 3 or 4 years ago. I’m really glad others will see this and gain valuable advice. 🤍
Thanks so much for this video! My partner and I do a "check-in" every two months where each of us gets the chance to reflect on what is going well and what we can improve (both individually and as partners). Creating that time and space helped deepen our relationship even though in the beginning it felt weird to formalize such a conversation. We detected areas in which we can grow and writing down our thoughts helps keeping track of improvements. Maybe this can be helpful for someone else too 😊
I’ve never a boyfriend. I’m 27 and I have never had sex before. This used to bother the fuck out of me. Now I’m ok with it. I’ve learned how to love myself before I choose to love another person. I’m exploring myself in different ways and I’m having so much fun doing it. I still want to be in a relationship at some point. But for now I’m very happy being just by myself.
who else almost didn't click on this video because they're going through a breakup right now??? this ended up being so relatable and validating, thank you Hitomi
I’m the same way when it comes to my intuition. I can always feel & get vision like intuitive downloads when something up. It always ends up confirmed wether I look for it, it comes to me, or they simply spill the truth.
I really wish I was aware of my worthiness 3 or 4 years ago... I used to go through such dramatic breakups even when I wasn't happy in the relationship, just because I felt so insecure when I was on my own 🙄🙄 I've learnt soooo much since then haha thank you Hitomi for being a perfect sister 💕
rather than think of the potential in my relationship with someone else, I can consider my relationship with myself! If I choose to act on how I feel and choose to support my needs, what could my relationship with myself grow to be? At the end of the day, that's the most important relationship to me
if you effortlessly heal, communicate,make each other happy,emotionally react , feel safe comfortable, have fun and calm with them, learn, grow, yet detached but support each other, yep, they're your soulmate. Im so grateful for that boy 😭
Thank you for this 🤍 especially the part about not having to be perfectly healed to be in a relationship. So often I convince myself that I have to have all my shit together (have my dream job, be financially stable, not suffer anymore from childhood trauma, etc) in order to have a healthy, good relationship. It’s something I’m still working on in therapy so I’m excited to see where my healing journey takes me. Thank you for being so open and vulnerable with us, it’s so comforting knowing we’re not alone ♥️
You're such a bight light Hitomi, you have helped me through so many things this time in my life... It seems as your channel found me at the right time, love from Greece ❤️
ugh i love your videos. after being in therapy, I realized I wasn't being fulfilled emotionally, mentally, or spiritually in my relationship. i decided to break it off. i explained to him that the universe has bigger plans for us and this is just part of the journey. listen to the divine messages the universe is sending to you!!!!
I'm really struggling with not taking things personally bc I been made to feel so small in past relationships I never heard anyone speak on this thank u you sharing your truth and advice it has helped me in so many ways
Every word you said resonated with my heart :) Thanks to this video I realized I wasn’t being treated as I deserve, now I feel like I am able to completely let this person go. I am eternally grateful with you!
When you said that you don't yearn for romantic relationships because you already so much love in your life and it resonated so much. Yes ! I am so loved already, by myself, by my family, by my friends. Thank you
every single point you touched on really struck a harmonious chord within me and helped me feel a big exhale. just listening to you talk such wisdom re: all of these areas helps me feel a deeper permission to be going through many of these challenges currently and for the past 3 years. I’m in a relationship that has been pretty tumultuous, my second long-term romantic partnership, and while it wasn’t nearly as toxic as the first- it’s been full of obstacles regarding boundaries, and mental health / healing from trauma .... the lessons have been unfolding, very messy at first, and at times still very messy- but slowly becoming more easeful with time and seeking help and looking inwardly. listening to what you have said here really just drove a lot of the lessons unfolding home and helped me feel validated in so much of my experience. not to mention, I’ve only recently discovered your channel- but the handful of videos I’ve watched of yours so far are resonating beyond anything else I’ve seen on TH-cam as a fellow sensitive, trauma surviving, star child, celebrating the beauty of life on earth, connecting with angels, living a sober life with yoga and intuition tuning practices as medicine. . . I also visited the Sacred Valley in Peru when I went 5 years ago for a yoga teacher training, and while I was there I fell deeply in love with the majesty of life, and still struggled with life ending thoughts almost daily. I worked with plant medicine down there, and ever since have been given so much homework, and am still healing the wounds that surfaced during that time. I’ve come a long way, and yet the healing process still continues.. watching your videos, even though we’ve never met, I feel so seen, and if you’re reading this- I want you to know that I see you too. 🙏🏻♡
YES YES YES to every single word you said! I had to be in some toxic relationships to fully see what I want and more importantly, what I don't want or seek in a relationship. Now I am in peace. In my case it took me nearly 30 years to understand this and to embrace it, I am so happy to see how you are already there even at your super young age :) love you! x
Love your channel Hitomi you're authentic and talk about things no one else is, you helped inspire me to hurry up and start my own, thank you I appreciate you.
i just found your videos not too long ago and i gotta say, i love your energy so much. i was always someone that avoided long-term relationships at all costs and was addicted to the feeling of new relationships, until i manifested my current partner. It's been almost a year and a half and even tho it's the healthiest relationship i have ever had, it also made me finally address all the unresolved trauma and toxic traits that i possess within myself. its crazy how much you can grow from relationships, but it doesn't mean it's easy.
This was so relatable and i resonate a lot with what she is saying. Me when i cant express my feelings and emotions i feel the hurt in my solar plexus and heart chakra, i always healing it but if u stick with this kind of relationship then the hurt will still be coming. Getting detached from a person who u know its not giving you enough is the first step towards liberating from that pain. When someone is align there's no need for explaining your needs cause it will be heard without saying.
It's actually really hard to swallow some of the things you said in this video 🥲 they are true and are waking me up in my sleep of ignorance. It's easy to keep giving my SO and I excuses bc we see potential in each other, love them, or can't be alone. This is one of my favorite videos of yours, thank you for your honesty. Blessings 🥺🥺💗
You have just literally saved me to get out of my comfort zone, speaking out my boundaries with the person I love, and having clarity in my relationships❤️ thank you
This fed my soul and I took your advice and communicated to the father of my child, whom I thought was with me, yet he stated that he didnt want a relationship. It didn't hurt because I felt liberated. Thank you!!
i REALLY needed this video today! i’m in the process of going through a breakup with my partner i’ve been with on and off for two years. it’s so painful because it finally feels like a real ending but i know that we no longer serve each other at this point in our lives, so it’s just heartbreaking. i’m learning how to heal and grow from this relationship and it’s so nice to hear some insight. thank you(-:
wow this makes me feel like i've done every single relationship wrong ever. The one im currently in makes me feel this way but i just love him so much, but i can relate to all the stuff that shes saying rn.
thank you sooo much for this video it was so timely. i'm currently in the process of getting over someone who was extremely kind and who i shared some lovely times with but as we communicated early on, we knew we were looking for very diff things so things drifted. it's been hard to let go bc i got attached to the potential and my own fantasies (plus we live pretty close). but watching this made me realize how much we can honor each other by letting go and accepting where another person is in their journey. truthfully i do hope we will be "normal" friends, it was mentioned after checking in with where we were at but at the time i still had obvious strong feelings so it wasn't realistic. if friendship is meant to be then it will but this video inspires me in the beauty in not being attached to any outcomes. and the lesson and miracle of this particular situation and meeting this person. thank you for providing me and i'm sure many others who watch this with some healing and gems of wisdom. here's to letting go and letting in 🤍
this is SO real Hitomi, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and experiences with all of us online. It takes courage! I went through similar things as you and resonate so much with your truths. You should definetly do a podcast addressing these types of topics. Relationships, healing, selfcare, navigating life through all its chapters.I think it could be extremely beneficial and empowering to us all. Lots of love and light to you, gorgeous being!!!
going through a breakup right now and i feel so lost especially since i still love this person so much. the beginning of our relationship was deeply flawed in that he cheated on me out of unhealthy patterns in the past and the fact that i struggled to speak up for myself. i stayed with him and after so many months he has changed in becoming the partner i really desired. we built something amazing and beautiful. yet, the way i saw myself in that cheating situation damaged my self worth. it was hard to let him go, especially knowing that we built something beautiful and genuine. i want to be with him but i also feel like i must unlearn everything i thought i knew about myself and relationships. i feel lost and scared. but i trust that whatever is for me will truly be fore me. along that way the universe will protect me
I can direct you to a man that help me last month He can solve your problems If you need help 💁 give me a feedback You don't even need to stress your self...
you are such an inspiration. i love hearing you speak as you speak so eloquently. every time you post i automatically get this immense sense of joy! literally, i every time i watch one of your videos i have a notebook to take some notes on things you say because they resonate with me deeply. thank you for always being so transparent and open with us all
thank you ! this video speaks to me on so much level bc i just ended a situationship bc im not gonna put up w any drama, and it did not serve me at all even though it felt good. still healing from it but at least im standing in my truth alone and i would not look back xx
Wow Hitomi, what you said about idealizing your relationship and still staying in that situation even if the relationship is not serving you resonated with me so much. My relationship ended very suddenly last month & I was devastated, I felt like I lost the love of my life... I do still think my ex is an amazing person but now I realize I was settling. I was not getting back all the love and energy I was putting in, in fact I felt insecure, neglected and not worthy of his time during most of our relationship... All this time I was just idealizing what we could have. I really needed to hear that. Thank you x
plssssss start a podcast so I can just listen to your voice all day. you carry so much wisdom and love, it's insane
A podcast would be amazing from her. I hope she reads this!
I was just thinking the same thing!! She would make amazing podcasts!
100% AGREE 🤎🤎🤎
yes yes yes!!
YES START PODCAST! 😭❤️❤️ LOVE HER VOICE SO SOOTHING
Relationships are not desperate necessities, they're a rich compliment to your pre-existing happiness.
that‘s just fucking right
EXACTLY
wow
a 30 min hitomi video is medicine for the SOULLLLL
omg meg i love your channel!!!!! you and hitomi need to collab
MY TWO FAVORITE CHANNELS
truly
Yesssss🥰
seriouslyyy
“Get sexual with life” that is such a powerful statement i felt it through the screen 😍🥰❤️
Yes, but, girl it’s been awhile and counting. Had a potential but it went nowhere. 😩
True
i think she said sensual but yes
Read 'Uses of the Erotic" by Audre Lorde :)
it's one of the most powerful statements i've ever heard
it struck me like a rock
"If he wanted to he would" 👏🏽 ugh, the truth in simplicity
Hey bb I see you watch hitomi ♥️
@@ivetandresmunoz7652 hehehe what a great smile this brought me!
i love how HEALTHY this advice is!!! There are people on tiktok and even on podcasts that give relationship advice but its veryyyyy toxic and rooted in misogyny
Cough cough call her daddy cough cough
@@alyxcarson2228 Hahahahha I didn’t wanna name names but exactly
♥️♥️
“I don’t know her”, so true when you are on this healing journey and you look back at your past self
im someone with an anxious attachment wound and hearing this advice was so healing not only for my relationships but my friendships
Same
ahhh same, lots of love to u
I told the last guy I hooked up with that I needed someone more available, to hold me, to invite me over after a rough day someone who feels safe and home....he didnt really respond but was rather angry as i would not respond any more, so he was more interested in receiving my energy than actually being vulnerable with me, I was so glad I ended it early...💜
Honestly because it was just a hook-up.
be proud of yourself for being honest and open with him from the beginning! that is a healthy habit to have, and I am definitely going to start implementing this into my life
You’re not gonna find that in a hookup first of all. Unfortunately for many of us who feel needy towards partners, we gotta learn that it’s not balanced energy to treat someone like a boyfriend before they are actually our boyfriend (ie loving and committed to us on some basic level)
❤
Hitomi could you talk more about how you embraced and "overcame" your high sensitivity/triggers? I could totally relate to you on the office crumbs story and I want to learn how to respond in better ways instead of projecting/internalizing
Not saying that sensitivity is something to be overcome - it's a great strength. But I hope you get what I mean hehe
i relate to that also.. i have a tendacy to take things personal when i’m not fully grounded or loving towards myself.
@@tessascarlett5367 same
Offices are the worse for highly sensitive people. I'm telling you from my experience. I had to run away from there.
Yes pls tell. I'm an extremely sensitive person, I take things quite personal
"we see someone's potential more than who they actually are in the moment." yup, i needed that one.
This video is beautiful. My girlfriend and I watched it together and it partnered perfectly with many long conversations she and I have been having lately. It makes me so emotional to know that we have the privilege of living in a time where mental health and illness, emotional triggers, sensitivity, and safe space are acknowledged with such depth. Thank you so much, Hitomi, for sharing all that you are and creating a space for all beings to thrive and harmonize. Much love!
I have never been in a serious relationship because I always thought my expectations were too high, but this reassured me that what I'm asking for isn't that farfetched and everything happens in divine timing.
Yess I can confirm this! I was 19 when I never even had been intimate let alone sexual with someone, I thought something was wrong with me for not being interested in boys(or girls) in a sexual or romantic way, also thought I set the bar too high. But my patience defenitely paid off when I found my love who I can truly be my 100% self with and who makes me feel at home. Its more than I ever even dreamed of. I’m so glad I didn‘t settle for less:) (not saying relationships are only rainbows and sunshine because it can be hard especially when you have some trauma to work through but yes, this is also a beautiful learning space)
If your internal landscape is full and wondrous, as you put it, you’ll attract likeminded people who are also full and wondrous.
Specific tips for this? 🥺
love this🤍💕😌
@@michelleamponsah7521 For me I began to look inwards for fulfillment rather than outwards. I started exploring all of my interests and passions that I had buried thinking they made me less desirable. I got more in touch with my emotions and shamed myself less for having them. I addressed past relationship traumas and my feelings around them, and tried to understand where exactly the pain I felt was coming from. I began to explore my creativity more with art, and learned to skateboard because I had wanted to since I was a child. I just began to accept myself and cultivate my interests and got to a point I was truly happy on my own. And then I attracted the right kind of attention and found someone who’s doing the same thing with their life. Whether or not you’re in a relationship it’s always important to focus on self fulfillment. Take time to do what makes you happy and pay attention to your inner child. For me the importance of my inner child lays in the fact that that was the last time I felt totally unashamed about my interests and play, was just myself, and explored the world with no preconceived ideas of how it should be. I hope that made sense, and good luck to you!
@@skystygian thank you so much for this!! 💕
half way through watching this, i paused the video and begun opening up to my partner about something we've been struggling with for a year now... i shared and expressed from a respectful and balanced place, usually i'm overly emotionally charged talking about it because it triggers so much pain in my heart... it is still in process, but anyway, i had a big break-through last night, and it was definitely supported by how clear and affirming i felt when opening the doors to the hard stuff - so for that, i thank you hitomi x
This comes in such a perfect time, I just ended my almost 3-year-old relationship, it wasn't even a toxic relationship, but there were some things that I wouldn't take anymore, and I spoke about that several times but there was no change so I decided to leave, and this speaks so deeply to me at this moment, there are so many things I want to work and focus on myself to heal rn, Idk, I just love this video so much
I wanted to know how you are currently doing now? (:
@@nelmorris2121 me tooo
"My intuition is strong and I can sense when people have had a sexual connection especially who I'm in love with" you truly are a scorpio Hitomi!!
Yes. And I finally found a partner who I can communicate with adequately. The moment something bothers me, we communicate and fix the problem. No gaslighting. No feeling guilty for talking things out. I’m literally going to marry this girl cause the little problems that arise, we figure it out so fast.
i like that idea of those inner voices of our intuition being our guardian angels
True
You always seem to post things at such the right time about the perfect topics. I’ve noticed myself growing at such a fast pace spiritually and I feel like my partner and I aren’t on the same level in this aspect, it’s always hard to let go and I’m not sure when I will but this video definitely helps me out a lot. I have some things to think about! Thank you so much.
I’m going through something similar, I’ve been with my partner for almost 4 years and now it’s becoming clear that I was dating based on a lot of projections and expectations, so seeing now that we might not be as aligned as I thought (and wish) we were really hurts. I still haven’t made up my mind about whether to stay or leave the relationship, but I’ve been thinking a lot
@@luvpotion333 vocalize it!! If he is ready work on things with you, you are meant to be. If he doesnt want to put in the effort, he isnt worth it
I went through this! we were together for over four years but i began to realize deep down i was no longer as invested in the relationship. The comfort of it all was what kept me attached- it actually took me several months to finally listen to my gut and break things off. I knew i wasn't truly happy anymore and the best thing you can do for your partner is to no longer ignore that. i learned to not be afraid of change or being uncomfortable because then you will BOTH get to where you're supposed to be much faster! hope this could help !!
@@Tina-by5xx just had an amazing conversation with him, he was really open and present and I feel like I liberated myself from a lot of suffering
I feel you 100%!
When I listen to your videos, I take my journal out and write as you speak. You have such insight. I really appreciate and love your words. If you wrote a book, I would read it sis.
Hitomi, thank you for sharing about the importance of noticing and being mindful of your body. So relate to what you shared about your throat chakra! For a period of time, I knew I needed to end a relationship but couldn’t admit that truth, and I kept feeling like I was about to choke on food constantly. Once I spoke to this person about how I truly felt, I stopped having that choking sensation. Our bodies are so intelligent and speak to us all the time ❤️ thankful for your presence and truth!
“Every person is God in disguise” 🤍🤍🤍🤍
A bit about communicating without fear: if there's something irking me a little bit in the relationship that keeps popping into my mind, I'll tend to take out my phone & record myself talking through the problem I have with said thing to figure out if it's something worth communicating to my partner or something I just need to let go of. Helps me reassure myself when I do find we need to have a discussion with each other.
I had a conversation this weekend with a really close friend of mine about just wanting to stay friends because I'm so happy by myself at the moment, that I don't want to be dating or be in a relationship. And he keeps trying to convince me but just slightly crossing the boundaries I set. Now I'm stuck in a weird place. I really feel like I needed to hear this and to know that I can and am allowed to feel like this and set my boundaries.
When you said “I want you to feel safe in my space” tears welled up from within🌊 maybe this is something I need to hear more💖 thank you for your magic & wisdom Hitomi🙏🏽
“We need relationship education in school…” I totally agree with this! I’ve talked as nauseam with friends/family about this many times when discussing sex ed reform (which I’m passionate about)! Consent and interpersonal skills are *soooooo* important and the idea that we (the US) have no national standard to teach for all to adhere to is so…🤯 to me 🤷🏽♀️
Something I've heard from a relationship counselor, is very similar to your 'speaking up immediately after you feel constricted' is: Maybe if your hot tempered and cant keep a cool head in a certain situation, take a deep breath, step away and write it down. It helps to calm your nerves as well as telling somebody (in this case your phone or notebook) about how you really feel. And then, most importantly, take your time once a week with yout partner to talk about what might've come up during the week. Speak openly and then things will not boil over. For example you ask eachother every sunday evening if they have anything to tell you, that might've bugged them.
Hope that helps! :)
I probably had to pause a couple of times throughout the video simply because I needed a moment to process things and resonate with this level of self awareness and realization. I wish for everyone to be this evolved in their relationship choices. It can honestly make the world a better place.
To the person reading this:
You are who you are.
You are a gorgeous and beautiful creation.
You are a masterpiece.
You are who you are.
You are strong and courageous.
You can absolutely do it.
You are powerful.
Remind yourself that you are who you are.
Move forward with your determination, and conviction.
You can absolutely do it.
Have a great day ahead,
Remember you are who you are.
❤️❤️❤️
Just recently ended a 2+ years long relationship and recently stumbled upon your videos, Hitomi. I’m grateful I did because it came at the right time as I’m beginning my spiritual journey.
Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and your journey with so many people. Your soul is beautiful and inspiring.
Needed this. I'm on this SELF LOVE JOURNEY. It's a sign of the Universe. Love u💌💌💌💌💌
Thank you for making this video 🤍 I’m going through a breakup right now
Hang in there beautiful!! this can be a time of growth and a time to fill your own cup 💞
@SSWEETEST... are you serious?
I hope you find so much happiness in the future❤️❤️
you are worthy of loveee
Hang in there 🤎 sending love ✨
@@jenniferferreyra7893 thank you 🤍🤍
A little over a month ago I decided to commit to a new relationship which was (and still is) a really intense decision for me after the trauma I experienced in my last relationship. My intuition is very happy about this person and I am practicing complete honesty and discernment and my partner holds so much space for my growth, as I do for his. This was all so refreshing to hear and assured me that my partner and I are on the right path. Your words always seem to resonate so beautifully, Hitomi. Thank you!
I couldn't agree more with everything you said! You need to focus on yourself and love being present before looking for what you are missing in someone else.
i completely agree with the stuff said around 25:00 we shouldn’t be preaching that if you’re imperfect you’re not worthy of a relationship yet!! grow together and support each other!
i feel like everyone's relationship problems is they can't help but get into toxic relationships all the time and my relationship problems is I can't connect with people at all to begin with. Like at this point I wouldn't even mind a non-ideal relationship I just want to connect with someone.
@starseed-bb I understand, i feel the same way! You're not alone 💜
@@sarahcoburn5870 Thank you, it’s nice to know it’s not just me ♥︎ Logically i know it’s not just me, but social media sure does make it seem like it is
Me too! I have just never connected with anyone romantically in any way and sometimes it makes me fell like there is something wrong with me...
@@JohnPorsbjerg yeah same, that's why I'm trying to limit my social media time but kinda finding it hard 😅 yeah like I've never had a long term boyfriend and I just find myself being intensely infatuated by certain boys but then it not working out because I can't emotionally connect with them even if I really like them :(
@@sarahcoburn5870 That sucks
I’ve had a partner who told me I was “too complicated” & it helps so much watching vids like these to realise I’m not an anomaly, there r people just as complicated as me & that’s okay
I love her mindset, and she’s so beautiful! It’s interesting because I know she’s applying this specifically to romantic relationships but it’s definitely applicable to all relationships. I’m going through a spiritual awakening, if you will, currently and it’s making it really hard to have honest open relationships with anyone I know right now. I feel isolated and at first it was lonely, but I’m realizing I’m not alone because I have God. That makes you more powerful than anything, having your Angels and the universe or God in your corner. I’m heartbroken right now, but I won’t regress, this is a big learning opportunity and I have to face the pain of the process! We all can :) this video helped me reach so much clarity, thank you 🙏🏼 💛
Just a note that some of these online counseling services are particular about the kind of mental health struggles they are capable of assisting with. For liability reasons they often will not accept new clients that have more serious mental health struggles. Please be aware going into that! It can be hard to receive a rejection (from a therapy service no less lol) when you're already in a difficult space.
oh BOY. did i need to hear every word
🪴YOU ARE GLOWING!! You radiate so much angel energy, thank you for blessing my life and being the big sister I never had. You have no idea how much you’ve healed me and helped guide me down the best journey of my life of self love 🪴
this video is so important to me and I feel so heard. I'm definitely the sensitive partner, finding myself crying at a lot of things that aren't meant to upset me, but equally I pride myself on being the partner to express my own needs and issues - communication is so important! I've found both validation and pointers to work on in this video, giving me a new perspective. thank you hitomi 💓 side note, you look so beautiful in this video (as always)!!!
Hi hitomi
i had a dream once i met you and we became friends and ever since then have felt such a connection to you and your words🤍you’re a blessing to this world and have taught me so much.
Just wanted you to know I took notes on this. Thank you for sharing!! I LOVE: "Every relationship is a teacher. Every person is God in disguise. Find the miracle." 🌿🌻
Hitomi “know thyself” is a valuable quote it’s all starts from within only then can you find a valuable partner. Look foward to having you on the podcast I emailed you about.
When Hitomi said that she had life-ending thoughts about not vacuuming something, that exact feeling and thought process is very applicable in my relationship now. I thought I was crazy for having that mindset but after a lot of inner work for myself, I understand that those thoughts came from an insecurity and much more. My partner (who is my first relationship ever and i am 22 yrs old) and I had a very rough patch last year because I was developing a lot of mental health issues. In addition, my partner didn't know how to handle me during my chaos. It was extremely hard because I lacked the skills and knowledge to navigate through my own thoughts& emotions- so how would I be able to express to my partner my wants and needs, when I didn't know what I needed?!. But with my own self-awareness and my partner's support, we're in a much better place. I want to note that I wasn't going through therapy and I think if I did have a therapist during this time, I would have saved my partner and me a lot of hurt and trauma. In essence, the man I'm with today is a huge blessing because I am constantly met with compassion and empathy. I know that every relationship is different but I wanted to share my experience on here to let someone know that even if you are in a healthy relationship, there is still healing that has to occur. As much as you think a relationship is the end goal, it's only the beginning towards healing deeper wounds you may have never noticed. It's a matter of putting in the work and showing up for yourself. And to constantly remind yourself that the reason why you want to be better, is to better for YOURSELF. Don't be better for your partner, be better for your own divine self and your partner should be an advocate for your growth because he/she/them would want you to thrive.
Blessings, gratitude, and love to anyone whose
read my comment.
Beautifully said ❤
“Just stop” ..best advice ever God bless you ❤️🤍
i love that you managed to put all my thoughts into a video!!! i feel like i'm hearing the kind of things I tell my friends i believe in
this was the first video i ever saw by hitomi last spring. sometimes you need someone to shake up your foundations. this was truly the catalyst for me cutting the cord on my relationship and getting back to me 💗💗💗
OMG, this is THE video for life! Absolutely, must see, must watch, even when you went through somoething toxic, karmic, or something not good for you, but you still didnt go over it, you doubt yourself, or doubt the decisions.
Im so thankful for You Hitomi even tho I found you just yesterday.. while listening to this, I'm in such peace with myself, at least for this moment.
This is such a mature and realistic, yet comforting perspective. I needed to hear something like this when I was struggling about 3 or 4 years ago. I’m really glad others will see this and gain valuable advice. 🤍
I wasn’t going to watch this because I didn’t think I would need it. Single life. But I did because I love you and I’m glad I did. 🙏🏼
Thanks so much for this video! My partner and I do a "check-in" every two months where each of us gets the chance to reflect on what is going well and what we can improve (both individually and as partners). Creating that time and space helped deepen our relationship even though in the beginning it felt weird to formalize such a conversation. We detected areas in which we can grow and writing down our thoughts helps keeping track of improvements. Maybe this can be helpful for someone else too 😊
I’ve never a boyfriend. I’m 27 and I have never had sex before. This used to bother the fuck out of me. Now I’m ok with it. I’ve learned how to love myself before I choose to love another person. I’m exploring myself in different ways and I’m having so much fun doing it. I still want to be in a relationship at some point. But for now I’m very happy being just by myself.
who else almost didn't click on this video because they're going through a breakup right now??? this ended up being so relatable and validating, thank you Hitomi
Thank you so much for this. You speak so eloquently and make perfect sense🤍
I’m the same way when it comes to my intuition. I can always feel & get vision like intuitive downloads when something up. It always ends up confirmed wether I look for it, it comes to me, or they simply spill the truth.
I really wish I was aware of my worthiness 3 or 4 years ago... I used to go through such dramatic breakups even when I wasn't happy in the relationship, just because I felt so insecure when I was on my own 🙄🙄 I've learnt soooo much since then haha thank you Hitomi for being a perfect sister 💕
rather than think of the potential in my relationship with someone else, I can consider my relationship with myself! If I choose to act on how I feel and choose to support my needs, what could my relationship with myself grow to be? At the end of the day, that's the most important relationship to me
:') as someone going through heartbreak right now, you're such a figure of light and positivity and strength to look up to. thank you for your content
if you effortlessly heal, communicate,make each other happy,emotionally react , feel safe comfortable, have fun and calm with them, learn, grow, yet detached but support each other, yep, they're your soulmate. Im so grateful for that boy 😭
Thank you for this 🤍 especially the part about not having to be perfectly healed to be in a relationship. So often I convince myself that I have to have all my shit together (have my dream job, be financially stable, not suffer anymore from childhood trauma, etc) in order to have a healthy, good relationship. It’s something I’m still working on in therapy so I’m excited to see where my healing journey takes me. Thank you for being so open and vulnerable with us, it’s so comforting knowing we’re not alone ♥️
I literally will use my data to watch this video while I’m out on a walk! Please start a podcasts!!!
ahaha this is such a good point!! podcasts would make Hitomi's words downloadable!
You're such a bight light Hitomi, you have helped me through so many things this time in my life... It seems as your channel found me at the right time, love from Greece ❤️
Can you do a part 2 please? I feel like this topic is really needed right now.
ugh i love your videos. after being in therapy, I realized I wasn't being fulfilled emotionally, mentally, or spiritually in my relationship. i decided to break it off. i explained to him that the universe has bigger plans for us and this is just part of the journey. listen to the divine messages the universe is sending to you!!!!
I'm really struggling with not taking things personally bc I been made to feel so small in past relationships
I never heard anyone speak on this thank u
you sharing your truth and advice it has helped me in so many ways
Every word you said resonated with my heart :) Thanks to this video I realized I wasn’t being treated as I deserve, now I feel like I am able to completely let this person go. I am eternally grateful with you!
When you said that you don't yearn for romantic relationships because you already so much love in your life and it resonated so much. Yes ! I am so loved already, by myself, by my family, by my friends. Thank you
Thank you for being here! I love and appreciate you and everything you do so much!
every single point you touched on really struck a harmonious chord within me and helped me feel a big exhale. just listening to you talk such wisdom re: all of these areas helps me feel a deeper permission to be going through many of these challenges currently and for the past 3 years. I’m in a relationship that has been pretty tumultuous, my second long-term romantic partnership, and while it wasn’t nearly as toxic as the first- it’s been full of obstacles regarding boundaries, and mental health / healing from trauma .... the lessons have been unfolding, very messy at first, and at times still very messy- but slowly becoming more easeful with time and seeking help and looking inwardly.
listening to what you have said here really just drove a lot of the lessons unfolding home and helped me feel validated in so much of my experience. not to mention, I’ve only recently discovered your channel- but the handful of videos I’ve watched of yours so far are resonating beyond anything else I’ve seen on TH-cam as a fellow sensitive, trauma surviving, star child, celebrating the beauty of life on earth, connecting with angels, living a sober life with yoga and intuition tuning practices as medicine. . . I also visited the Sacred Valley in Peru when I went 5 years ago for a yoga teacher training, and while I was there I fell deeply in love with the majesty of life, and still struggled with life ending thoughts almost daily. I worked with plant medicine down there, and ever since have been given so much homework, and am still healing the wounds that surfaced during that time. I’ve come a long way, and yet the healing process still continues.. watching your videos, even though we’ve never met, I feel so seen, and if you’re reading this- I want you to know that I see you too. 🙏🏻♡
YES YES YES to every single word you said! I had to be in some toxic relationships to fully see what I want and more importantly, what I don't want or seek in a relationship. Now I am in peace. In my case it took me nearly 30 years to understand this and to embrace it, I am so happy to see how you are already there even at your super young age :) love you! x
Love your channel Hitomi you're authentic and talk about things no one else is, you helped inspire me to hurry up and start my own, thank you I appreciate you.
all of your videos have these comforting, nurturing tones
i just found your videos not too long ago and i gotta say, i love your energy so much. i was always someone that avoided long-term relationships at all costs and was addicted to the feeling of new relationships, until i manifested my current partner. It's been almost a year and a half and even tho it's the healthiest relationship i have ever had, it also made me finally address all the unresolved trauma and toxic traits that i possess within myself. its crazy how much you can grow from relationships, but it doesn't mean it's easy.
I feel like you're the older sister I never had, thank you for sharing your insights and wisdom, so much love 🦋🌱💞🌏
This was so relatable and i resonate a lot with what she is saying. Me when i cant express my feelings and emotions i feel the hurt in my solar plexus and heart chakra, i always healing it but if u stick with this kind of relationship then the hurt will still be coming. Getting detached from a person who u know its not giving you enough is the first step towards liberating from that pain. When someone is align there's no need for explaining your needs cause it will be heard without saying.
We’re all together on this healing journey!! Cheers to not taking less than we deserve!
It's actually really hard to swallow some of the things you said in this video 🥲 they are true and are waking me up in my sleep of ignorance. It's easy to keep giving my SO and I excuses bc we see potential in each other, love them, or can't be alone. This is one of my favorite videos of yours, thank you for your honesty. Blessings 🥺🥺💗
U need to upload podcasts !!!! Your advice is immaculate
You have just literally saved me to get out of my comfort zone, speaking out my boundaries with the person I love, and having clarity in my relationships❤️ thank you
"Finding oneself" is potentially the greatest and most useful truth that can be discovered. Hitomi you do god's work!
Yes I have intense mental health issues and I didn't realize the person loves me but it can be so draining
I need to be doing the work as well
This fed my soul and I took your advice and communicated to the father of my child, whom I thought was with me, yet he stated that he didnt want a relationship. It didn't hurt because I felt liberated. Thank you!!
hi hitomi
can literally feel this soothing my heart
i REALLY needed this video today! i’m in the process of going through a breakup with my partner i’ve been with on and off for two years. it’s so painful because it finally feels like a real ending but i know that we no longer serve each other at this point in our lives, so it’s just heartbreaking. i’m learning how to heal and grow from this relationship and it’s so nice to hear some insight. thank you(-:
wow this makes me feel like i've done every single relationship wrong ever. The one im currently in makes me feel this way but i just love him so much, but i can relate to all the stuff that shes saying rn.
sending you love sis ❤️
thank you sooo much for this video it was so timely. i'm currently in the process of getting over someone who was extremely kind and who i shared some lovely times with but as we communicated early on, we knew we were looking for very diff things so things drifted. it's been hard to let go bc i got attached to the potential and my own fantasies (plus we live pretty close). but watching this made me realize how much we can honor each other by letting go and accepting where another person is in their journey. truthfully i do hope we will be "normal" friends, it was mentioned after checking in with where we were at but at the time i still had obvious strong feelings so it wasn't realistic. if friendship is meant to be then it will but this video inspires me in the beauty in not being attached to any outcomes. and the lesson and miracle of this particular situation and meeting this person. thank you for providing me and i'm sure many others who watch this with some healing and gems of wisdom. here's to letting go and letting in 🤍
this is SO real Hitomi, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and experiences with all of us online. It takes courage! I went through similar things as you and resonate so much with your truths. You should definetly do a podcast addressing these types of topics. Relationships, healing, selfcare, navigating life through all its chapters.I think it could be extremely beneficial and empowering to us all. Lots of love and light to you, gorgeous being!!!
reframing taking an L to "taking the miracle" is such a game-changer! slowly moving through ACIM rn thank you for this content hitomi
This is important for ALL partnerships. Romantic, friendships, family etc. thank you for communicating this so effortlessly. ❤️
Somehow you answer all of my questions throughout your videos, your openness and willingness to share your journey is so admirable! love you Hitomi :)
going through a breakup right now and i feel so lost especially since i still love this person so much. the beginning of our relationship was deeply flawed in that he cheated on me out of unhealthy patterns in the past and the fact that i struggled to speak up for myself. i stayed with him and after so many months he has changed in becoming the partner i really desired. we built something amazing and beautiful. yet, the way i saw myself in that cheating situation damaged my self worth. it was hard to let him go, especially knowing that we built something beautiful and genuine. i want to be with him but i also feel like i must unlearn everything i thought i knew about myself and relationships. i feel lost and scared. but i trust that whatever is for me will truly be fore me. along that way the universe will protect me
I can direct you to a man that help me last month
He can solve your problems
If you need help 💁 give me a feedback
You don't even need to stress your self...
you are such an inspiration. i love hearing you speak as you speak so eloquently. every time you post i automatically get this immense sense of joy! literally, i every time i watch one of your videos i have a notebook to take some notes on things you say because they resonate with me deeply. thank you for always being so transparent and open with us all
Sending love and energy of peace your way too Hitomi! Your advice is great and especially relevant with today’s culture
thank you ! this video speaks to me on so much level bc i just ended a situationship bc im not gonna put up w any drama, and it did not serve me at all even though it felt good. still healing from it but at least im standing in my truth alone and i would not look back xx
Wow Hitomi, what you said about idealizing your relationship and still staying in that situation even if the relationship is not serving you resonated with me so much. My relationship ended very suddenly last month & I was devastated, I felt like I lost the love of my life... I do still think my ex is an amazing person but now I realize I was settling. I was not getting back all the love and energy I was putting in, in fact I felt insecure, neglected and not worthy of his time during most of our relationship... All this time I was just idealizing what we could have. I really needed to hear that. Thank you x