WHY ARE WE SO SCARED OF AGEING?

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 9 พ.ค. 2022
  • Are you worried about looking older? Why? What does it mean to you? Why does it worry you? Is it because you think you ‘look old’? Or that people won’t find you attractive anymore? Or that someone said something to you? What (if any) concerns do you have about looking older?
    A friend on mine in his 50s said that he gets less ‘look’s now (someone checking you out) than when he was younger. I wonder if it’s because we just don’t notice it the same way as we did when we were younger? Because we’re more content now? In relationships? Not actively looking ourselves? Or maybe it is because we are older and we are expecting ‘younger’ people to check us out?
    What do you like about ageing? What benefits have you found?
    Let me know in the comments sections.
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  • แนวปฏิบัติและการใช้ชีวิต

ความคิดเห็น • 967

  • @littletwinflower2940
    @littletwinflower2940 2 ปีที่แล้ว +315

    I feel like women are shut out of so much in our culture and society the moment we hit middle-age. If we try to engage in things that are considered "too young" for us, we are mocked. But the good thing about getting past 40 is I no longer care what others think about me.

    • @karatalksaboutstuff7333
      @karatalksaboutstuff7333 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Yes! Age is so much more stigmatizing for women than for men. I feel like that's slowly changing, but it's still very real.

    • @cianog
      @cianog 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Women have the advantage when their young. They don't have to compete for partners like men do

    • @karatalksaboutstuff7333
      @karatalksaboutstuff7333 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      @@cianog Advantage in what??? Dating? That's one small aspect of life. Women are judged harshly for our appearance in ALL aspects of life.

    • @cianog
      @cianog 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@karatalksaboutstuff7333 Dating and everything associated with it is a big part of life. Women when their young don't have to work for male attention. This changes with age and women experience what is the norm for most men.

    • @karatalksaboutstuff7333
      @karatalksaboutstuff7333 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@cianog Why...why are you here?

  • @nancytilsonsinback1168
    @nancytilsonsinback1168 2 ปีที่แล้ว +179

    I’m mid 60’s and yet don’t worry about aging. My skin looks good, my hair is purple, and my heart is young. Don’t let life age you.

    • @Chris-sj5lj
      @Chris-sj5lj 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Rock it Nancy!

    • @alexandracummings2852
      @alexandracummings2852 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Love this Nancy

    • @Phy5icsFaer1e
      @Phy5icsFaer1e 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Being able to go bold with hair colors (and or streaks as I start to grey) without bleach is one of the things I really look forward to - so happy you're rocking it Nancy! 💜💜💜💜

    • @tammystiletto
      @tammystiletto 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      💜💜💜🙌🏻

    • @Cherrycreamsoda1
      @Cherrycreamsoda1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I think bright colours hair looks better on older people than younger ones - especially since when it starts to go naturally white it takes up the dye much better :))))

  • @lorimcgee-minnich1525
    @lorimcgee-minnich1525 2 ปีที่แล้ว +569

    I’m 60. I was considered to be pretty, but I don’t feel pretty or attractive anymore. I color my hair, do my makeup, but some days I wonder if it makes any difference. My lower face is sagging, but there’s not much I can do about it. I’ve also found that as you get older, in some situations, you start becoming invisible if you are in a group of younger people. I guess that’s to my advantage! I love watching your videos and try your techniques. I’ve always loved makeup! Love ya!

    • @cynthiabiel7714
      @cynthiabiel7714 2 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      I JUST used the word invisible....before I read your post........I color by hair...and wonder if I should stop...I admire older woman who keep going...wear nice wigs and make up.........I do spruce myself up but wonder if it matters anymore...

    • @robinsierra1029
      @robinsierra1029 2 ปีที่แล้ว +67

      As I said I turned 70 last July and I’ve been coloring my hair for many decades and for no reason just because my hair dresser talked me into it. I’ve always worn my hair long and colored it dark but about a year ago I chopped it all up to half an inch. It’s a very beautiful silver white and I love it. I realize men will see me as an older person immediately but that’s just the way it is

    • @lostinnevermore5354
      @lostinnevermore5354 2 ปีที่แล้ว +65

      If young people ever disrespect you just remember they will age and grow old. That’s a guarantee.

    • @kahome
      @kahome 2 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      I guess I wont have the same problem. Been born ugly will grow old ugly lol. Aging is natural everyone will grow old and sag. As I grow older time matters more to me than what other strangers sees and think of me.

    • @DanielleNicoleMakeup
      @DanielleNicoleMakeup 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@lostinnevermore5354 well, if they are lucky enough to live that old. But yes they will assuming so

  • @cammierountree5172
    @cammierountree5172 2 ปีที่แล้ว +153

    At 57, I can say I wish aging was accepted in our world. Because it is something many of us will be blessed to do (age), it would be so much easier on us if it were accepted.

    • @doodleartlover
      @doodleartlover 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      I totally agree! At 54 and going through menopause, I wish the world accepted and appreciated the laugh lines, cry lines etc., that have been learned and earned over the years.

    • @cammierountree5172
      @cammierountree5172 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@doodleartlover 💖

    • @TracvM320
      @TracvM320 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      My daughter just came home from Japan . She said the most interesting thing that she took away was how VALUED older people were in their society. She said it was amazing the amount of respect that is shown towards them.

    • @brigitte9999
      @brigitte9999 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      You accept it, you have to know by now other people’s opinions are just that!

    • @walternicolas1734
      @walternicolas1734 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@cammierountree5172 Hi how're you doing today?

  • @Roseismyboxer
    @Roseismyboxer 2 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    My mom has a tattoo that says "Ageing is a privilege not everyone gets"

  • @EliseMarquamJahns
    @EliseMarquamJahns 2 ปีที่แล้ว +217

    There are so many wonderful things about the blessing of getting older. One of the many things is realizing and enjoying the truism of this thought: "When you're 20, you care what everyone thinks. When you're 40, you stop caring what everyone thinks. When you're 60, you realize that no one was thinking about you in the first place."

    • @reginaroza3154
      @reginaroza3154 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Lol so true! Although I'm not one who ever worries about what other people think of me, I'm ok with me maybe that's why. I march to the beat of my own drum; always have and people know me for that! That's how I'm staying young, being present, grateful to have made it to 60, living fully, not lavishly by any means, but being present and appreciating the life I do have! Some are not so fortunate, I have great health and a lot of gratitude!

    • @ChrisLee66
      @ChrisLee66 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Thank you for sharing that, in fact it's the most truth I've heard in ages.

    • @cherylemmanuel744
      @cherylemmanuel744 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      I agree. It’s a privilege to age.

    • @LydiaTarine12
      @LydiaTarine12 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Love it! 😊

    • @jmbutler5
      @jmbutler5 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      interesting realization, wasn’t it?🤔

  • @MillieonaVespa
    @MillieonaVespa 2 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    Getting older ….A privilege denied to many ..

  • @MsCdngrrl
    @MsCdngrrl 2 ปีที่แล้ว +69

    I think there is one difference, men are considered attractive as they age, women become invisible. The huge hormonal switch in women when we go through menopause truly shows on our faces not matter how we take care of ourselves. I used to get attention from men and women because I was attractive, at 51 I am truly invisible. To become invisible is a very painful thing to become.

    • @blorkpovud1576
      @blorkpovud1576 ปีที่แล้ว

      Even though they say guys get better with age, as a guy I still hate getting older.

    • @feyafeya1741
      @feyafeya1741 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      The reason I'm really scared I'm only 24now but I think everyday that after 10 years I'm gonna be invisible .for men they be still attractive after 40

    • @aprioriontoast704
      @aprioriontoast704 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      @@blorkpovud1576 I wouldn't say men get better with age but there are a lot of men that can pull off aging better than women when it comes to how they look. Not all men , receding hairline , beer belly , sagging face etc all these things can make a man look less attractive but men can look more grizzly with age whereas women struggle because female beauty is all about soft youthful features.

  • @TarahALJ
    @TarahALJ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +86

    Personally, I think it's the media and advertising that make people feel like they need to look younger. The more someone sees adverts for products that claim to make people look "younger", the more people feel the need to look a certain way. There's nothing wrong with ageing, it's a beautiful journey.

  • @debbremberger5980
    @debbremberger5980 2 ปีที่แล้ว +132

    2 things: media and society. Not just with aging, but with weight, clothing choices, hairstyles, etc. You're lucky to be a man! You get "distinguished" as you age. After I turned 50, I became virtually invisible. Media portrays young, slim, beautiful models as the standard for perfection. Women want to feel beautiful, no matter their age, so try to retain their youthfulness through every new product offered. And society: at least in the US, the elderly are not admired or seen as fountains of knowledge. We are not cherished, but outdated relics. The elderly are the castaways and too many times ignored. I do see a small shift in the media toward including older women/men, but nowhere near enough to make a difference. Very little about the natural beauty of aging. I applaud you, young man, for your refreshing viewpoint toward aging and older people. The world needs more people like you!!!!

    • @joyce7310
      @joyce7310 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Yes to everything you just said.

    • @claudiac7346
      @claudiac7346 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Very true

    • @Diorella_scent
      @Diorella_scent 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      So true, much love x

    • @lv4230
      @lv4230 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Couldn't have said it any better

  • @cvonsutphen
    @cvonsutphen 2 ปีที่แล้ว +109

    As a 55 year old woman, things definitely shifted during menopause. The weight gain, and hair loss certainly affected my self-esteem. I no longer color my hair but do use a toning gloss treatment every few weeks to keep the grays at bay. I am not concerned about aging, but the sag in my face is alarming at times. I changed my diet and dropped 25lbs. , also upped my skin care game. Make up application presented a new learning curve as well. I'd rather be healthy with wrinkles than obsessing over not looking 29.

    • @GINGER70HINTZ
      @GINGER70HINTZ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Same, wrinkles but healthy and with my four limbs I will be all set.

    • @kittima3218
      @kittima3218 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Amen, sister! I’m 51, and in the throes of menopause!
      I went from a size 2 to a size 10 after all of the menopause weight gain. It only took about six months to go from being 50, and having maintained my high school weight without moving a muscle. I always thought…
      At least I’ll always have my figure.
      I did not have children (or a husband--I’m a spinster!) I have cats… they’re cheaper…crazy cat lady, as well. Nothing’s certain anymore and I’m wondering how much worse it will get and how soon. I feel like I look gross. This is not my body, it’s unacceptable.
      I don’t color my hair because I can’t wait for it to go completely white…my grandmother went white at 27 and had the most gorgeous white hair. Don’t even get me started on my face!

    • @Maxine-ho3jc
      @Maxine-ho3jc 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yep, menopause can make you feel really grotty which makes getting made up a real effort most days. You are doing the correct things and living a healthy lifestyle and making the best of yourself. We all should. 🥰

  • @tallisinwonderland4724
    @tallisinwonderland4724 2 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    I worried about ageing so much in my forties and now I’m 50 I realised I just can’t stop it and need to make the best of it. I saw a lady last year who totally changed my perception of it all. She was in her seventies, no make up, grey, pixie hair cut, lines on her face but she was just so beautiful I couldn’t stop looking at her. She was playing cards with her husband and friends and I could hear just what a lovely person she was, so soft and feminine, just that beautiful kindness and care to others that older women can have. I realised what’s on the inside starts to show an awful lot on the outside when you age. She was gorgeous and I’ll never forget her 🥰

  • @JoR00ke
    @JoR00ke 2 ปีที่แล้ว +125

    You do talk a lot of sense Wayne. I'm not worried about wrinkles but I don't like the sagging as it makes me look miserable! Unfortunately if you're a woman you become invisible after a certain age. Western society could learn a lot from other parts of the world in how they revere their elderly. Until we treat all ages with respect people will always want to look younger xx

    • @TracvM320
      @TracvM320 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      I just said this in another comment- my daughter just got home from Japan- she’s an officer in the Navy. She said the older population there is so respected and valued

    • @JoR00ke
      @JoR00ke 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@TracvM320 They certainly have the right attitude 🙂

    • @JayneNicoletti
      @JayneNicoletti 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I feel the same. Its not the wrinkles its the sagging but that's just gravity.

    • @lesliehatch-herman9325
      @lesliehatch-herman9325 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Jo, I think you are spot on about the invisibility issue. It can be downright hurtful. Humor helps a lot!!

    • @Bosquecito_de_Laureles
      @Bosquecito_de_Laureles 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      That’s the point, not looking old per se but the fact that (talking from a woman’s perspective cause that’s what I am, nothing more) it seems you become invisible and irrelevant at a certain age unless you look or maybe do something extraordinary

  • @saramaloney6082
    @saramaloney6082 2 ปีที่แล้ว +54

    Thank you Wayne! I really appreciate this. Ladies and men , you are not invisible! Put on clothing you love, sunscreen, lipstick, and enjoy life. Health is everything, move that body! The endorphins are key. I'm 53 and I care for my husband who is 49 with aggressive cancer. I will age without him. His situation has vastly changed my view on aging. I am thinking of you all, difficult when society bombards us with messages. Find others living their most joyous aging lives, help others when you can, get out of your head! ... oh and once again sunscreen.

    • @kandiblick3822
      @kandiblick3822 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      💖💖💖🙏

    • @kathiejaine
      @kathiejaine 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I so appreciate your post. I’m 53, and my husband died 6 years ago at the age of 36. He’ll never know aging or the beauty of life. You have given me the gift of enjoying aging, which honestly I hated. Much love to you and your precious husband. ❤️

    • @kathiejaine
      @kathiejaine 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I so appreciate your post. I’m 53, and my husband died 6 years ago at the age of 36. He’ll never know aging or the beauty of life. You have given me the gift of enjoying aging, which honestly I hated. Much love to you and your precious husband. ❤️

  • @klf153
    @klf153 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    We become "invisible" the older we are. Speaking from experience at age 78. FYI, 44 is prime, not old. Heck, I look back now in great appreciation for my 60s!! I didn't realize how young I still was...

  • @1marya.
    @1marya. 2 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    Anti-aging products are a natural result of a society that is inherently anti-age. I worked in nursing homes and care homes for years and people would always say to me "I don't know how you can work in one of those places, they're so depressing." I had a great time working in those facilities; old people are a blast to hang out with and I loved getting to know them and hearing their life stories. It's also very telling, how death is treated in our culture. When a loved one dies, someone comes and takes the body away. Someone gets the body ready for the funeral. And then all the people who have loved and cared for this person mourn from a distance, with little to no touching of the body. Very cold and sterile. We're terrified of aging because we're terrified of the unknown and we'd rather stick our heads in the sand and pretend we're 20 when we're 50 than embrace each stage of our lives and honor our years.

    • @GINGER70HINTZ
      @GINGER70HINTZ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Ooh my your comment brought back the memorie of my 3 sisters and I got my mom dreesed up in the funeral home. I asked the staff and they say yes so we did it and I think that helped us all these almost 15 years a go.

    • @kimg7989
      @kimg7989 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Thank you for this perspective! 💖

  • @joygernautm6641
    @joygernautm6641 2 ปีที่แล้ว +60

    I’m not afraid of Looking old. I never defined myself by whether or not I was pleasing to the male gaze. As a matter of fact as you get older it’s kind of a relief to not have men constantly after you.
    I work in a hospital and what I fear about ageing is the possibility of dementia or serious debilitating disease. If I have a stroke or a heart attack and drop dead that’s fine that’s actually a good way to go. But I would fear having a stroke and being half paralyzed and being bedridden and dependent for years because of it.

    • @monicawarfsmann4672
      @monicawarfsmann4672 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      thank you for this wise and truth comment, i 100 % agree with you:)Health is the most important thing in life and the love of family and friends.

  • @ShinyHappyBean
    @ShinyHappyBean 2 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    I'm 51, for my entire 20's, 30's even 40's I felt the same way as I did at 18. I didn't think about growing older, felt invincible. However after 50 things started to change, time goes faster in an out of control scary way. Menopause and hormonal changes has meant my body has changed, not significantly but enough that I know longer recognise it. Maybe the botox I have, the anti ageing creams, the makeup and hair dye is a way to find my way back to who I was and in attempt to see myself again. Growing old is absolutely a blessing and many people don't make it, but since 50 and the years going so quickly it is a daily reminder that I have now lived more life than I have left and that is terrifying. If someone could tell me I would live another 60 years, grey, wrinkled, but with good health, vibrant, useful and mobile, I would embrace it in a heartbeat, but they can't. So..."Anti aging" isn't an 'antidote', it's merely a way to cheat my brain into thinking I can somehow slow down time.

    • @Timeisirrelevant
      @Timeisirrelevant 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I'm so sorry you are scared by the time you have left. We never know how much time we have. And if you believe in the Christian faith, you know we will have new bodies that will be perfect and imperishable. 🙂

    • @paulareid7478
      @paulareid7478 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Wow... try as I might, I can't seem to shake those very thoughts myself...I lost my Mama a year ago Saturday, she was 93. Unfortunately, she had been in a facility the last 5 years or so, with both physical and cognitive issues. She was such a beautiful, vibrant ray of light...I turned 60 in February, and I am happy in all areas of my life. I've been a singer/ songwriter, and always had what I call a "gypsy soul". I just never could picture myself being "content" . I'd say, if I could have a pergola or loggia and plant the surrounding garden... or if I could still travel the country in a bus as I did when I was performing.. well, in 2014,I married my high school sweetheart, he built me a beautiful pergola, and the garden is gorgeous, with wisteria draped over it. We just purchased a 38 ft. RV, absolutley stunning- and just went in our first trip... and when he retires it will be a beautiful 2nd home- on wheels...I still do have a bit of that gypsy spirit...
      Live your life to the fullest... each moment.

    • @AbstractMindsThinkAlike
      @AbstractMindsThinkAlike 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@Timeisirrelevant amen

    • @ericalampley480
      @ericalampley480 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      THIS

    • @justrose6978
      @justrose6978 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Feeling you sis 💕

  • @cynthiadavison3581
    @cynthiadavison3581 2 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    I'm 56. I agree that aging is gonna happen. Be good to your skin. Stop trying to be 20.! Age gracefully and be fine with it. It's society and advertisers shoving youth at us.

  • @culinaryzest
    @culinaryzest 2 ปีที่แล้ว +74

    I agree with the women using the word invisible. At 54 and one year post menopausal, I feel like my face isn't mine anymore. But the worst part is feeling like you're invisible :( I was one of those that always looked 10 years younger than I was, after menopause meh. I would love to say it doesn't bother me, but it does.

    • @mus1quenonst0p
      @mus1quenonst0p 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      and to wayne’s point, i am terrified of this exact thing happening to me. i am still a while away from it, but i fear it. can hormone therapy help with menopausal aging signs?

    • @Tara-oy5ni
      @Tara-oy5ni 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I absolutely agree. At work, even though I'm friendly to people of all ages, with younger women, it's like oftentimes I'm invisible. It's frustrating.

    • @monicawarfsmann4672
      @monicawarfsmann4672 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      i agree ,menopause changes nearly everything and it hurts to be ignored.But with little treatments and the love for oneself we dont need the opinion of the others

  • @rebeccavalentine-hagart3545
    @rebeccavalentine-hagart3545 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    I have a close friend who is so very wrinkled for her age but, do you know, she comes across as years younger purely because of her attitude. We need to concentrate less on all the media and advertising filling us with fixes for things they tell us are wrong with our faces, bodies etc. We should all try to live our lives as fully as possible with kindness, acceptance and being true to our best selves. Those wrinkles, that we all should want, tell a story of a life lived. It's a shame that Western society is so blinkered not to see beneath the surface.
    Thank you for this little video ❤️

    • @JayneNicoletti
      @JayneNicoletti 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      It's so true. My Mother in law has just as many wrinkles as her friends around the same age but she works part time and hangs out with her grandkids as well as going out a lot. She seems so much younger than her friends.

  • @CrawlingPOA
    @CrawlingPOA 2 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    I think it goes back to the bigger idea of “having it all”. It’s chasing perfection: having the looks, brains, money, love, etc. all at once. Some people genuinely think being more attractive/younger will improve their life or fix their problems.

  • @viennafaces
    @viennafaces 2 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    The problem with getting older is the fear to be 1 foot away from death, and the most what people fear is death, it's the life, which is faded away and the suffering of missing all the opportunities in this lifetime. It's a subconscious longing for eternity and keeps us extending the longing for youth. Appreciate your video Wayne, just right on point for my 48th birthday. Thank you.

    • @hannahmitchell87
      @hannahmitchell87 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Happy Birthday! 🥰

    • @picture-you
      @picture-you 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Finally someone said it. I believe, like most things, that this is a lot more subconscious and psychological in nature. Humans are inherently and naturally afraid of the unknown (death) so it’s not at all surprising that it also reflects on how we view our physical bodies.

    • @lookinass2332
      @lookinass2332 หลายเดือนก่อน

      You can die anyday. I look at getting older as a blessing because many people don’t make it to the age you are. I was scared about turning 30 but then I lost one of my best friends at 28 from cancer. Many people I knew from high school already died at a young age didn’t even make it pass their 20s. So yeah old age eventually leads to death but so can young age if you are unlucky and dying from old age is always the better option.

  • @MariaMartinStudio
    @MariaMartinStudio 2 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    I'm 47 and my career is in Cosmetology. I entered the field at age 28 after almost 10 years in Silicon Valley (CA, USA) as an Executive Assistant. I thought it was fun and creative and it truly is. I think that our collective fear of ageing stems from an innate biological 1. fear of dying, and 2. fear of becoming irrelevant as we lose our fertility (especially women). Gray hair, wrinkles and sagging skin are all outward signals that a person/woman is no longer fertile and our lizard brains change the way we perceive them/ourselves. If you think of it from a biological, instinctual perspective, humans did not live as long as they do today, so anyone over about 30 was either dead or had to be cared for by the tribe.
    Things we tend to consider beautiful: smooth skin, healthy teeth, shiny hair, bright eyes, long, thick lashes - are all signs of fertility and therefore relevance in society (sexually attractive, in other words) and businesses have for the past hundred years or so, emphasized the "need" to have these qualities in order for feel attractive, successful and relevant as a human being. In my practice, I always encourage the fun aspects of "beauty" as opposed to feeling "gross", "bad" or any other other hurtful terms people use about themselves. I have a client who is about 82 years old and she is SO PRETTY. I tell her every time I see her. I try to apply this perspective and sense of security to myself as well, but honestly, it is difficult since women have throughout history been judged and valued for their appearance and not much else. It's changing, but it's changing very slowly. ;-)
    I think a more simple aspect is also that as we see our faces and bodies changing with age, it is unnerving. We don't know how to be 40 because we've never been 40 before, etc.
    Thank you for being such a lovely, creative, honest and positive presence in the industry, Mr. Goss. xoxo

  • @alfiewashere.695
    @alfiewashere.695 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    I'm not scared of aging......I'm just very sad that I didn't appreciate my looks when I was young! My skin was flawless, my hair thick, glossy and curly and my figure, although not super slim, was no where near as disgusting as I thought it was! My dear husband tells me that at 55, I still look 30......bless him. But everyday it's like another grey hair appears, and yet another ache or pain surfaces. I need to learn to be grateful for still being.... walking the earth with the privilege of getting older......because many people don't !

  • @kathykit7629
    @kathykit7629 2 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    I just turned 71. I don’t fear aging. I am not happy with the way I look sometimes. I enjoy watching your videos because your tutorials have helped me improve the things about my face that makes me less happy with my look. I have sparse brows now and one brow looks higher than the other. You have helped me look more symmetrical with brow filling and shaping. Fixing brows, eyes, and lips helps to be more pleasingly balanced. Wearing blush higher on the cheeks for some lift. All this has helped me be more satisfied with my look. I will still always miss my 35 year old jawline, which is probably the only time I exclaim “shit!” While looking in the mirror. Thank you, Wayne.

    • @Purplenpinkk
      @Purplenpinkk 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Happy Birthday! 71 - what a milestone.

  • @catb3215
    @catb3215 2 ปีที่แล้ว +74

    I just want to know what wrinkle sent me into being referred to as “ma’am”. I’m 41 & I’m having a hard time dealing with aging. Social media definitely sets unrealistic expectations. I know a lot of women use filters but it’ still makes me question how I’m aging. I wish it didn’t bother me so much.

    • @TheBeautyExpert
      @TheBeautyExpert 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      I’m 35 and I’ve noticed all of the sudden ppl are calling my ma’am. And why does it bother me so much? I don’t know but it does

    • @jamiemckenna3668
      @jamiemckenna3668 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I live in the south and we call each other ma’am as a sign of respect even if we’re the same age, simply because we might not know each other well (servers, cashiers, operators, coworkers, etc)
      I even call my daughter ma’am sometimes
      Hopefully next time someone says this to y’all you think of that and it takes the edge off
      ❤️
      It’s okay to be a ma’am 👌🤟🫶

    • @elainelouve
      @elainelouve 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      In my country people don't usually use those words, except in healthcare. I guess it's a way for the nurses in particular to treat their patients with respect. It does feel weird though when they call me madam and address me formally. This has begun only recently, so I've figured I must be looking old now, though in my 40's I don't consider myself that old.
      But I got used to being called an auntie too.x) To little kids all strange adults are aunties and uncles. That started already back when I was a teenager / young adult, and it felt super weird at the time, but now it just feels normal.
      Our French teacher at school said in France they call madame every woman that is perceived to be of the age that she might be married, so in France it has always felt more natural, since in my head it's just everyone thinking I'm an adult and not a teenager anymore.

    • @elisaastorino2881
      @elisaastorino2881 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@elainelouve it's the same way in Italy. Only very young women are called "signorina" - under 30 for sure and very likely under 25.

    • @LCx829
      @LCx829 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I’m still called miss but I’m in California. I used to always edit the bags under my eyes in pictures. Now I just live with what I have good or bad.

  • @kristax6x613
    @kristax6x613 2 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    As someone who’s having an early 30’s crisis, I needed this video lol

    • @katam3310
      @katam3310 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      My 30 was ok, i had my kids so i wasn't thinking nothing but this hits me when i hit 40 😅 i was really sad and depressed thinking nothing good for me at this age ...now I'm 42 and i think it's not about age it's about what you enjoy and want to do in life, age is only a number, it's how you feel ❤️

    • @gypsyluv1118
      @gypsyluv1118 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I had crises when I turned 19 OMG my last year as a teen!) and when I turned 29. I went out to eat with my bf but would not tell our roommates why. I couldn't admit I was 29! Now I'm 70. lol.

  • @jenessastrickland1555
    @jenessastrickland1555 2 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I’m about to turn 40 (gasp!), and to be honest, I feel like there is a way in which people past their 40s or 50s are just sort of left out of popular culture. Looking at TV, movies, and even advertising, all of the exciting stuff is happening to people under 50, and a lot of it to people who are under 40-45. Going to college, building a career, falling in love, having kids…these are the things we focus on as a culture, and we assume that stage of life is wrapping up in your 40s. It’s as if nothing exciting happens to you after you turn 50, or at least nothing happens that anyone cares about. Nothing happens that’s worth making a movie about, etc. Of course that’s not true, but we just don’t talk about the later stages of life as much or in the same way. At best, you have stories about people over 50 “getting their groove back” or having a “second act,” but that’s treated as a novelty of sorts. I think this leads to a fear of aging as a fear of…becoming irrelevant, becoming someone who can no longer be a protagonist in an exciting, sexy TV show. That’s really sad, and I hope popular culture expands this way.

    • @tanyagarvin3422
      @tanyagarvin3422 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      As a rebellious youth..I choose to travel then have kids..then get married. Different order from the norm. Now some 30 years later I would do it all over again in the same order. Lol

    • @VeronicaCid
      @VeronicaCid 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      It’s funny because in my 20s one of my fave shows was Golden Girls. I thought it was so much more fun to see old ladies living together getting into mischief than people my age! Now I love Grace and Frankie, they are in their 80s and make me laugh. Also love to see women 30-40 yrs older still living life and kicking ass!

    • @jenessastrickland1555
      @jenessastrickland1555 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@VeronicaCid same!

  • @DoctorSquish
    @DoctorSquish 2 ปีที่แล้ว +94

    I agree with you, I am all around happier with myself and my appearance in my 40's than I ever was when I was younger. But I think most of us have the assumption that people will perceive us more negatively when we look older.

    • @di3486
      @di3486 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I definitely look better in my 40s than in my 20s! I am one of those that looked teenagerish until late 20s and finally started to look like a grown adult in my 30s.

    • @ojyochan
      @ojyochan 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Omg doctor squish☆☆

    • @paulinecoburn181
      @paulinecoburn181 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      40 isn’t old. Wait until you’re 70. You’re treated like an idiot!

  • @stp4779
    @stp4779 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    I’m having an incredibly difficult time coming to terms with getting older. I’m 43 and terrified of looking “old”. I’m ashamed that I’m terrified of this. I can’t seem to reconcile two ideas: that looking and getting older doesn’t necessarily equate to being less adventurous, less spontaneous and sexy, less open to new thoughts and ideas. The image of my mom is cemented in my brain: beaten down by life, unadventurous, set in her ways, void of effervescence. I feel as is these characteristics were etched onto her face in the form of wrinkles and age spots. I’m scared to look like my mom because I don’t want to be like my mom. Which I know is a ridiculous conclusion.
    I don’t want to be what society associates with older women: that we’ve “given up”, are content to only be caregivers, are chaste and dull and grandmotherly.
    I realize I have the power to obliterate this stereotype, but it’s challenging. You help.
    Great talk Wayne ❤

    • @kimg7989
      @kimg7989 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      This resonated with me! I also feel the same regarding my mom...💗💗

    • @stp4779
      @stp4779 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@kimg7989 It's hard for sure. My brain has definitely bought into the idea "old = bad"

    • @sl4983
      @sl4983 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      .

  • @sabrinam.4306
    @sabrinam.4306 2 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    I'm 51 today and I've never felt better 🥰 Take care of your body and your mind 😘 Getting older doesn't have to be painful. Stop comparing yourself to the online filters that most use.

  • @lesliesaperstone172
    @lesliesaperstone172 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Thank you for speaking in a logical, straightforward, yet compassionate way about aging. I turned 71 in March. I've never had anything done to my face yet I think about it a lot. I'm told by many that I look younger than my actual number. I don't feel my age and I don't let it define me. I don't feel "invisible" yet and I push myself to keep doing the things I love. My neck is the one thing that drives me crazy but hey! I'm healthy and don't want to have surgery. My mom lived to be almost 95 and always had a young attitude. She wore jeans and knew how to use her iPhone and computer. I have to say that my 50s were my favorite. But, like you, I consider any day that I can still put on my makeup, see my grandkids and be with my husband as a healthy "senior" - - a great day.

  • @BranMuffin365
    @BranMuffin365 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    And I always try to remember that aging looks more like an evolution through "see me" "hear me" and "revere me" stages of life. It's time we get back to honoring our elders and learning from the wisdom they have to share. Seeing beauty in a woman or person of any age.

  • @mariagol3174
    @mariagol3174 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Agree 100%. My sister died at 12. I am 47 and embrace every year with the changes that that involve. What a blessing to be adding years!

  • @susanhart9058
    @susanhart9058 2 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    The female body was never supposed to be smooth, firm and flawless. It was designed to create life, to host life, to feed life.
    Feed yourself well, physically, mentally and spiritually, and then enjoy your life with the vessel you inhabit. It’s a one shot only thing. Peace, laughter and acceptance are the best medicines around.
    Author : Donna Ashworth Words

    • @TracvM320
      @TracvM320 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Beautiful ❤️

    • @xdandychiggins
      @xdandychiggins 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      i know you meant good by posting this, but let’s keep in mind that a lot of women don’t want children and a lot of others physically can’t have any, so the whole meant to create host and feed life thing can be problematic….

  • @stephaniethompson9300
    @stephaniethompson9300 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I accepted looking older before it ever happened. I have earned every minute of it. People can do what they want to themselves, but I admire a person more if they just roll with it.

  • @xxglowenxx
    @xxglowenxx 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    "One less day from dying young"- Rob Thomas
    I absolutely love this song because it's cathartic and puts aging into such a beautiful light
    Plus, I swoon for older couples being cute, and shouldn't I want to be that cute couple making people swoon?

  • @myfabulouslifewithlupus
    @myfabulouslifewithlupus 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Just to weigh in, at 53, I am happy with each new year that passes and grateful for the memories I build with each year. The last thing I am concerned about are wrinkles. I get botox for migraines and there is always some left after doing the places for migraines and she always asks if I want to do my forehead or crows feet and I always say no. I like having an expressive face and don't mind looking my age. I have earned every line by smiling often and I don't wish or want to diminish that. Thanks for sharing.

  • @michellephipps8106
    @michellephipps8106 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    BC we become INVISIBLE! & treated like we're irrelevant! Literally EVERYTHING is marketed to the YOUNG.
    I'm 53, try my hardest to beat back Father Time but couldn't possibly feel less "sexy" most of the time. 🙄
    Wayne, you know the answers to your questions. 🤷🏻‍♀️🙃

  • @cocoatmidnight7611
    @cocoatmidnight7611 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Wayne, more people should have your outlook on aging. I am 68 this year, natural silver/pepper hair and have had no botex or surgery to my face I am the most happiest that I have been in my life. I have cleanse my face and use moisturizer, spf also but I am no longer concern with how others “judge” me. I am just happy to be me.

  • @chanilior4994
    @chanilior4994 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Great questions. I think people associate aging with death, sickness and/or loneliness, so it's something they try to "avoid ". My father passed at age 37, so I'm thrilled to be 61, and pray that I'll get much older. That being said, I want to look good and try to take care of myself. But hey, I earned my wrinkles and wear them proudly.

  • @yeneka713
    @yeneka713 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I love this discussion. I'm 49, and for a long time, i hated my stretch marks and as i got older, my wrinkles as well. I felt scared that over time, as both increased, my husband would stop finding me attractive, and would eventually "trade me in" on a newer, more perfect (unblemished) model. Well, i'm not sure why i ever worried about any of that (it is more a testament to my insecurities than it is to his lack of honor or devotion). I had to work hard at changing how i saw myself, but i have now come to actually celebrate these "flaws" as badges of exactly how rich my life is. My stretch marks are the visible reminders of the gifts of each of my four children. My crows feet are the evidence of so much laughter and joy in my life. Even the lines between my brows show the crushing despair, heartache, and pain i have endured in my life, but obviously i'm strong enough to have survived all of it, because i'm still here. You can tell i'm a mom just by looking at my body, and you can tell how much i've laughed and cried just by looking at my face. And i wouldn't have it any other way.

    • @nadinejacques8094
      @nadinejacques8094 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Wonderful comment Yeneka. I feel like you, I'm scared that my husband will find me less attractive.

  • @brendagraham7999
    @brendagraham7999 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    It is so true that’s it a privilege to age I lost a brother when he was 36 , my twin brother at 47 and my sister at 53 , I am 52 now I don’t think I look old I don’t look 21 but I am good with how I look, my partner is 65 and got to say I love his wrinkles they tell a story of life ♥️I remember my mum at my age and everyone back then looked older just by the style back then , we dress younger now hairstyles are great, I will never say never but I don’t think I need injections to make me feel better or have fish lips , we need to learn to live in our own skin, we are not the house wives of the oc 😂, love that you are taking about this Wayne, love you ♥️👏👏👏

  • @sastevens1210
    @sastevens1210 2 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    I wish the world felt the same way you do, Wayne. In the world we live in now, "old" ladies are invisible and irrelevant.

    • @Patriot1789
      @Patriot1789 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      If you want to stop being invisible, stop voting for Republicans who seem to truly hate women- especially young women!

    • @joyce7310
      @joyce7310 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yes,I feel the same way.

  • @pattasy7213
    @pattasy7213 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    When we put our appearance on a judging pedestal and thrive off the media validations on how good we look, it becomes a huge part of our identity. When those looks fade, the validations fade and it feels like we are losing a part of ourselves. So of course, the scramble begins to hold onto it.

  • @lauriejohnson7086
    @lauriejohnson7086 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    “Aging is an extraordinary process whereby you become the person you always should have been”~ David Bowie.

  • @SueRosalie
    @SueRosalie 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Getting old is the aim! Ageing is always better than the alternative.And GOOD HEALTH will give you what you are looking for.

  • @olga2you
    @olga2you 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    My mom had my sister and me pretty young so our childhoods matched up with her anti aging late 20s, 30s era. So back then I was 10 feeling 25 using tightening creams and stuff. Now I’m almost 30, feeling almost 50 and I think I have ironically “aged” out of holding onto my youth. As a 50 year old woman, I’m now mentally embracing myself as an 80+ woman who knows it’s silly to fight against time.

  • @vickinparadox
    @vickinparadox 2 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    Unfortunately what happens to us, women especially, is not how we look or feel about ageing,, we can be fine with it. Its when go out and find the way society treats us that's so hurtful and damaging.

    • @Smr8115
      @Smr8115 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      I agree. I’m 40 and back in school to start a second career. My biggest fear is that I will be discriminated against because of my age.

    • @gypsyluv1118
      @gypsyluv1118 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@Smr8115 I went to acupuncture school with another woman who was 60 at the time. She had a lot of wrinkles but she was smart and great personality. She became a successful acupuncturist in PA. This was in the year 2000. so she's 80 + and I bet she's still going strong.

    • @Jennifer-jf7nx
      @Jennifer-jf7nx 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      So true.. society treats women like they are useless when they age.. it’s very depressing and often times husbands cheat or leave their wives for younger women.. I used to be beautiful now I look in the mirror and wonder what happened. I’m always thinking about botox and fillers but afraid of possible side effects

  • @vaneetaaggarwal370
    @vaneetaaggarwal370 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I'm 43 and I proudly say that I look and feel better about myself than those who are younger than me and want to make me feel older. People tell me that they want to look like me when they get older...
    I feel age is really just a number and you will look only what you feel about yourself. Don't listen to the people who say negative things about you. Stay with your positive friends.
    Listen to your body what it needs as it's needs are always changing. Stay fit, stay classic and look after yourself. Don't try to look like anybody else. Look at our parents how gracefully they are turning older and try to do the same.

  • @stacyrensburgoliver
    @stacyrensburgoliver 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I’ve seen radiant beautiful women in their 60s and 70s they inspired me to take care of myself and age gracefully. Ageing is a gift and a blessing 🙏🏻❤️
    Society plays a part, that’s why we should celebrate people at all ages and showcase them across the media and normalise ageing!

  • @emilyevans6989
    @emilyevans6989 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I want to begin here with this statement: “You do YOU!” Over the years I have stopped coloring my hair, cut it in a tousled pixie, thrown away shoes that hurt my feet, no longer wear foundation, put no garment on my body that isn’t comfortable, and I’m more me than I have ever been. As a result, I have become INVISIBLE. I guess people think I have nothing to offer because I refuse to take part in some ancient or even modern rituals that might make me more attractive to OTHER people. It’s sad that no one seems to care about the real person I am-because I am older, because I am me. Our own personal mortality scares the daylights out of most of us, and most people are very uncomfortable around those of us who embrace and enjoy who we are, and how we look! Just my thought.

  • @meenalaregina7770
    @meenalaregina7770 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Hi! Ageism in the workforce is a serious issue, so age reduces the attractiveness of our profiles. The fear of being sexually invisible is also a serious concern because we live in a society that glorifies youth. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  • @pmvf19
    @pmvf19 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I love you Wayne for doing this.
    I am 64yrs and buzzed my hair and love my life as i have lost my best friend at 49yrs another at 60 from cancer.
    The things we think is important like being thin no lines big hair are all very well but not really important.
    Age and lines come with wisdom life lessons .older men and women have so much more .
    We are still here not faded away because how we look.
    Thank you for being you.
    Best wishes from USA

  • @renferal5290
    @renferal5290 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    As someone who is soon to be 62, I just want to have healthy skin and to simply be healthy and fit. And you are right, it really is such a gift to get older. I am perfectly happy

  • @rosemarysemprez1265
    @rosemarysemprez1265 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    At 73 I feel wonderful, but do not like looking tired. Looking at the media (TV, Magazines, video) there is heavy concentration on looking younger not having healthy skin. I love your philosophies of looking your best with what you were given. Keep your videos coming

  • @idreamofparis7233
    @idreamofparis7233 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I’m 50 and when I was a lot younger I hated the idea of getting old. I remember thinking in high school that 25 yr olds were ancient. Something switched a few yrs ago. I realized that aging is natural and a gift. I wasn’t supposed to make it to my first birthday. So now I view every day I’m alive as a gravy day. Switching that view has been such a boost. I am joyful now because I’ve beat the odds. I was born with an ultra rare blood and kidney disease, just a few thousand people in the entire world have it. I try to take care of my skin like I take of my body. I want it to be as healthy as possible. Society does put a lot of pressure on people to look a certain way.

  • @susanzimmerly9792
    @susanzimmerly9792 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I totally agree!! Aging is a gift! I personally want to look healthy & happy... not young and frozen.

  • @OnyxRoseReiki
    @OnyxRoseReiki 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Because everyday we move closer to our death. That's why you shouldn't procrastinate because tomorrow is not promised. I give gratitude and Thanks for waking up and being able to be in life at the same time as Wayne Goss. You're one of the greats♥️🎉🙏🏾

  • @gkan07
    @gkan07 2 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    Great discussion Wayne. I’m less concerned about wrinkles as I am my eyelids sagging. I look unrested and sleepy all the time.

    • @ericalampley480
      @ericalampley480 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      YES! Sad, mad, or sleepy. That's me. And I notice I subconsciously lift my eyebrows which is making my forehead wrinkles deeper! Dammit!

    • @gkan07
      @gkan07 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@ericalampley480 😂😂😂I can totally relate. Double dammit!

  • @sharonlmc65
    @sharonlmc65 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I find I’m happy with the way aging is going. But I let the voice of mean hurtful people creep in once in awhile about how she looks old or wow you’re aging etc and it makes me feel that I’m not worth while. Then a kind man like you comes on here with such an amazing message and I’ve decided I’m going to choose to believe that most men and women feel the way you do. I’m 56 and I have a lot of life to live and enjoy. Here’s to aging 🍷

  • @sheilablake7913
    @sheilablake7913 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Growing older is a blessing that not all are given the chance to do. I lost my mum at 59 years old. I will never complain about ageing if I’m given the chance. My mum was beautiful. Her red hair had faded to sandy red colour with streaks of grey which she never coloured. She had beautiful soft, perfect skin & only moisturised occasionally! She barely had any wrinkles and couldn’t have cared less if she did. She loved her family, life & her friends. I miss her every single day. Although cliché, she *truly was* my best friend. I love you mum, always ❤️

  • @bernard3612
    @bernard3612 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Everyone wants to get older, but no one wants to get old! I loved the way I looked in my 40'S, I really did, it's these early 70's that are causing me to doubt.......! Thank you Wayne.

  • @terrilabeth
    @terrilabeth 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Bless your lovely heart, you are a beautiful man. I am so glad you are talking about this. I will be 55 next week. That is a staggering number to read but only because I don’t feel it. It is odd that this whole anti-aging thing didn’t become a thing for me until last year. I did the things the women in my family did, across generations. So what suddenly changed? I can pinpoint it to almost the second it happened. I helped my brother through cancer and my father before he died, was putting makeup on for my father’s funeral, literally the first time in 3 years (had to go and purchase new stuff) and was shocked by the changes. You can do all creams and things for your face without looking closely in the mirror. So after this last year, after this obsession with all of the anti-aging videos and Toks, AND products, I decided to let all of it go. Not myself, I will still do all the things the women in my family did, every single one of them beautiful, all the way up to the age of 99 and 97. My mother is 81 and beautiful. I am giving up the obsession about it and giving up the worry about what everybody thinks. You are fortunate if you reach 55. I am blessed with knowledge and information that I didn’t have in my 20s and 30s. I am not even the same person. There is power in that and beauty as well. The fact that society doesn’t think about this in the right way is shocking. Because you cannot avoid aging. No matter what you do it will catch up to you at some point. You WILL be beautiful if you are a good person, inside that shines to the outside. I had a man insist on buying my Chinese takeout food the other day and all I did was laugh with the people working there. No makeup, just me. I sat down with him, thanking him, and he said, I couldn’t help noticing how beautiful you are. Yes, indeed! 😂 Thank you for this video, maybe it will wake some people up? You have the reach and it is so important to talk about this! ❤️

  • @TracvM320
    @TracvM320 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I am 55. I am going to thank you for what you have said. I don’t know why, but I feel that perhaps it’s a society thing. I think ( in my mind) - I still look great! I am always questioning everything though-
    Can a woman “ my age” have long hair? Can I wear a certain thing? Blush? No blush? Are my nail color choices old lady looking? Foundation? Do my hands look old? It is always an argument in my head. The questions are endless. Maybe we are afraid, so many unrealistic things are presented after 50.
    I feel like a discounted version of myself. But the questions I ask are not to please myself… they are based on what others will say…. I know it is cowardly to wonder- but it is the truth in my case

  • @robinsierra1029
    @robinsierra1029 2 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    I literally looked 10 years younger until I hit 70 last July. I still don’t have many wrinkles but. But I have big eye bags after COVID. It’s all vanity. But men aren’t interested in women in their 70’s. I still have a high libido so, it makes it difficult. Again. It’s all vanity.

    • @janarlenesogge1729
      @janarlenesogge1729 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Its like we become invisible after a certain age at least in the USA. In Southeast Asia it was different. Age was better appreciated

    • @brigitte9999
      @brigitte9999 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Good for you!

    • @robinsierra1029
      @robinsierra1029 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@brigitte9999 it’s just genetics. My mother died at 69 with no wrinkles

    • @lesleydecker1015
      @lesleydecker1015 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      This is me exactly Robin. 70 was the year ageing caught up with me. I became invisible. I still do skin care, but there’s actually days I don’t. That’s so not like me. I don’t look ghastly, I’m not a crone. However I finally look my age. I won’t be cut. I’m so happy I didn’t go into modeling or acting as I was planning on. Those people have to be cut and snipped and sucked all the time. It’s their job. All the men my age go with much younger women. I suppose the being invisible bothers me the most.

    • @robinsierra1029
      @robinsierra1029 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Brigitte, Exactly the same with my mother she died at 69 with no wrinkles also

  • @ericalampley480
    @ericalampley480 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I always looked younger than my age and then went through early menopause. I feel like I RAPIDLY aged because of it and now at 52 I'm struggling.

  • @leahblue1190
    @leahblue1190 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Partly I feel there's a fear of ageing in the West especially, or in Western-type thinking, because our culture has a deepset fear and almost taboo about death and of course the older we get the closer we get to this transitional state from the physical to the Mystery.
    Other cultures, in other times, respected older people for their knowledge of the past and of many details that helped survival. Plus they were less afraid of death in many previous cultures or some present ones. The wrinkles and signs of age only showed the amazing thing that a person survived that long when so many did not, and knew so much that the younger ones did not.
    They were valued, and could contribute to society through food production and caring for young ones, healing, and teaching the stories, legends, and industrial knowledge of making tools, medicines, etc. Sex was not overvalued as it is in our Western-type cultures, because ensuring food, shelter and safety came first before that.
    And no one thought that young people invented and owned sex, it was part of being human, and wiser people are human too, let's not forget!!! Apparance in general was not overvalued as it was considered an attribute some had aplenty, and many did not, and there was more understanding of the varieties of human appearance and that no one was at @fault@ because many if not most people lost teeth or had so-called imperfect teeth, all sorts of noses in every shape, length and with bumps, and many skin problems.
    People have always wanted to look good if possible, and often decorated themselves in some way, but it was less of a big deal since there were no illusions that noses, mouths, teeth, eyes, hair, etc could be altered into someone's idea of @beauty@ (which is always variable depending on the racial or ethnic characteristics considered the norm or even an atractive feature).
    Overall, there was a simple perception that human beings came in all sorts of ages, forms, appearances, shapes, deformities even. These were noted, evidence is that people have always found some people more attractive than others, but the difference I beleieve is that the importance put on this was not great, So many, many facts of trying to survive in a harsher environment were more important.
    As for age, since so few reached grander ages, they were often revered as being quite blessed and if pretty healthy and of sound mind, they were very useful. In modern times, we have so many basic needs already met, such as what to eat that day, and where we will sleep, and we don't hav to do hard labor to survive, that we can examine every bit of ourselves in a host of media and compare our looks to those presented to us as perfect, awesomely beautiful, the ideal of beauty, and we have the luxury of extra time on our hands, so we can worry ourselves almost to death, or tragically, even to death, because we believe we just don't make the grade. We are appearance failures.
    Millions of us blieve we are not good looking enough, we are far from ideal, we may even decide our fine looks are hideous and monstrous because our culture over-emphasizes youthful images portrayed as the height of beauty, And we are told we should ALL look that way, andlook that way FOREVER, Many of us believe that the lie of the lyric, @Die young, stay pretty.@ It is so sad. Much healthier to think, Live long, take care of yourself, and grow in wisdom.

  • @deetalbott
    @deetalbott 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thank you for this topic! I am very lucky that I look 10 years or more younger. I always get plenty of sleep and I take care of myself. There are times I feel every bit of 57, but I wouldn’t change anything. I don’t use a lot of makeup and I think that helps, but if there is a special occasion then I go all out. It is so sad that society has made women so self conscious about getting older. I am proud to be my age and I look forward to getting older!! It is refreshing to hear you say that you find wrinkles attractive. I absolutely adore you. 🥰

  • @CharitySRose
    @CharitySRose ปีที่แล้ว +1

    My sister is battling stage 4 BC and she says every wrinkle every gray hair means you’re living. I try to remind myself aging is a gift. Praying she ages.

  • @marianhall9126
    @marianhall9126 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I'm 63. I don't feel my age. I keep very busy. People always guess my age to be in my mind fifties. I don't really care what other people think. I feel like I have grown into my skin finally. I do whatever I want to do regardless what people think. You can't live life worrying about getting older. You have to embrace it.

  • @LindaMcification
    @LindaMcification 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    You, dear Sir, are a pioneer of this new trend. Congratulations 👏🎉!

  • @latherandlace
    @latherandlace 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I'm about to be 63 and I don't believe men look at me anymore. I was always looked at when I was younger. I do not get fillers or botox to try to stave off aging. I do love makeup so I still do it all up everyday. I was my best in my 40s and early 50s but I think based on an old boyfriend asking me if I still liked see after menopause (I never gave him an answer) it's all about the sex. I really do.

  • @tracypunshon7100
    @tracypunshon7100 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Fantastic video: I agree and it's great to hear you say this. Having always suffered from invisibility and now being 52, I enjoy the freedom to dress more adventurously. I love watching make up tutorials, developing my skills and making myself look (and feel) better. Not younger, just better. I put together a pinterest page of people my age and older who have captured an essence of original style that is beyond age for inspiration.

  • @loricrawford8426
    @loricrawford8426 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I'll be 65 in about a month and the changes I love is letting my naturally curly hair go gray. What I hate is the sagging skin. As Lori stated below at this stage you tend to stop feeling as pretty. I've always loved getting up, doing my make up and hair and feeling ready to tackle the world. I still get up put on my make up and hair but tackling the world takes a little more work and energy now a days. I'm thankful for everyday, learning to age gracefully is taking a little more work.

  • @raine1144
    @raine1144 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I'm 68 years young, and have been told by many that I look between 50-55. I have no wrinkles yet, but I'm dreading the eye baggage. I've been watching your tutorials on how to cover the shadows under the bags, but still haven't completely mastered it as you have, or perhaps I'm using the wrong shades of concealers. I don't fear getting old, just the inevitable knowing how poorly the elderly are treated in our society. Having no children or relatives to speak of, the fear factor is much greater. And, of course, there's the fear of not knowing what comes after this life. Going through three failed marriages and settling for men who didn't deserve me, I'm at terrible crossroad in my life. I met my soul mate several years ago who is half my age. While we connect in so many ways, I have not told him of my secret crush on him, but the connection is real and very powerful. So, I have no fear of wrinkles; only the fear of what comes next and the regrets I made along the way.

  • @jillyfae4895
    @jillyfae4895 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Thank you for this! I'm just into my 60's and embracing it! For the first time, I am done with coloring my hair and letting the "witchy silver" (grey) shine through. I take good care of my skin, so I can pass for 45. Just a few lines and hereditary darkness under my eyes is my only concerns. I've followed your under-eye primer and minimal concealer videos and that really helps!

  • @joangieseke8941
    @joangieseke8941 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The term “anti-aging” has always bothered me too! Thanks for addressing this little-discussed topic. I believe it’s primarily because our culture worships at the altar of youth. Older people-women especially-are treated as invisible and irrelevant.

  • @Maxine-ho3jc
    @Maxine-ho3jc 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Getting old is a privilege that not everyone has. I am now 2 months older than my Mum lived to (52).

  • @couchkat8337
    @couchkat8337 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Thank you so much for this video. I needed it. I just turned 59 and am really noticing the changes that happen as we age. I no longer feel as confident in myself. This video is a reminder of what a gift life itself is and how fortunate we are for each day we are given when none are promised. Just smile and be happy❤️

  • @CrystalK---
    @CrystalK--- 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I just turned 52 and most people say I look 42. I do see myself aging and I think it came in me pretty fast. However, I do have very nice skin. I've always taken care of it. Never really used anti-aging products. I use what will put moisture into my skin. And drink plenty of water! I didn't see my mom's age until she hit 65. To me, she's Gorgeous! I also want to agree that getting older is a true Blessing! My daughter passed away last year at 26 years old. Wayyy too young! This year, for once I enjoyed my birthday! 😊

  • @AzDesertFoxx
    @AzDesertFoxx 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The vainer one is, the harder aging is for them. I'm 56, and speak from experience!! I had botox the first time when I turned 50, and did it every 9 months or so for about 4 years. I haven't had it since. I look my age, and most days I'm ok with it. I think I'd rather look like me than like all those long, puffy , overfilled faces we see on celebraties. Most don't look human any more. While I may look 56, I don't feel it, nor do I act it! I think staying active, keeping up with what's goin on in the world, and not deciding to be "old" helps a lot. Love ya, Wayne!

  • @StellaGizzi
    @StellaGizzi 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thanks Wayne you’re so right. None of us are going to look decades younger but we can look after what we’ve got. There’s no shame in getting older. It is a privilege ❤️

  • @carolbowles4142
    @carolbowles4142 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Hi Wayne-I love your videos, especially when you talk about aging and ageism. I’m 71 and still care about how I look. I have always loved make-up since I was a little girl and I still wear make-up every day and take good care of my skin which I didn’t always do when I was young. I think society in general and the emphasis on youth in marketing which has been going on for a long time now is greatly to blame for everyone wanting to look young and deny natural aging, especially for women. Sometimes I feel like older people aren’t “seen”. I would love to hear what your thoughts are in 30 years on this subject, but I probably won’t be around then.😊💖

  • @julilla1
    @julilla1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I don't mind aging at all, though I do hate what is happening to my neck. 😂 Honesty, I think we don't know how we're supposed to look anymore as we age. We're so used to seeing celebs who botox and fill and when you don't do that, I think we're unsatisfied. Society tells us that men age attractively and that women "hit the wall". So...you have to be strong to fight against those messages that we've been raised with.

  • @jessicao8517
    @jessicao8517 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I'm older fatter wrinklier but aging is a gift! As long as my friends and family will be happy to see me walking in their direction I'm good.

  • @Chris-sj5lj
    @Chris-sj5lj 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I am 62, I have taken care of my skin and I know that my genetics plays a part in how I look as I age. I have never given a fig if I look "old" to someone because i have (one purpose!!) grey hair, or whatever the social media thinks as scary. I want to show up in the world as a "senior" with a fierce attitude and let them stare. Marketing wants to scare us into buying more and more stuff to keep the truth at bay. Let's choose loving ourselves with all the human flaws, the lines that show we have lived a life and continue to take care of ourselves. I love seeing other women that are rocking the grey hair and look like they are happy and having fun. Lov ya, Wayne, -I learn from you and will continue to define myself as how I choose to to, not how product tells me how to be..

  • @OlgaMur
    @OlgaMur 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    One year ago I decided to stop dying my hair. I had to dive into my prejudices on a woman with white hair. Do I really think a woman with white hair looks less attractive than a man with white hair? Is it really what I think or have I acquired that thought over the years? What do I base it on? It took me a lot of time to figure it out (thanks pandemic!!!) and now I love the way I look. We don't fear aging, we fear being left aside from society because we don't fit in the role and image of what a woman of a certain age shall be.

  • @jasmingumhold8379
    @jasmingumhold8379 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for choosing this topic! You are such a ray of light!!! 🌺

  • @VioletteValentine
    @VioletteValentine 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I'm about to turn 66 and I am proud to be this age! I don't look young and I've gained weight. Keep my hair super short...it's grey. My focus is maintaining mobility and eating healthier. I don't care about looking young. I'm more confident, much wiser, more comfortable in my own skin. Also, this is a great time in life to enjoy your life and do a few favorite things that you've never had time to do. Maybe people fear illness or death...very thought-provoking, Wayne.

  • @mud1949
    @mud1949 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Oh my darlings - I’m 73. Creaky and gray, but I surprise many when I tell them my age. It’s attitude and healthy looking skin.
    I do use sunscreen, lotions and potions. Some creases, some sagging but it’s all okay…best to all❤️

  • @Tara-oy5ni
    @Tara-oy5ni 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I'd like to embrace aging, but I'm not there yet. Yes, I appreciate the wisdom I've gained along the way. However, its proven that people, particularly women, are discriminated against in the workforce if they're older. Men are often perceived as sexier as they age, whereas women often are not. It's unfair, but true (at least for the most part).

  • @michelepattison9241
    @michelepattison9241 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I'm 66 and choose to focus on my mental and physical health. I'm probably an outlier but being celibate has given me clarity and freedom that I never experienced in a relationship. I focus on family, friends and doing as much good as I can, while I can.

    • @elisaastorino2881
      @elisaastorino2881 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Great observation. Look at all the comments focusing on sexuality, which is only one part of life and really not that important - especially women who talk about being so attractive in their youth - they're clearly having a worse time of it because they can't handle not being the hottest girl in the room any more. Most of us were never that attractive and in the long run, I think we're better off.

  • @PaolaRL
    @PaolaRL 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    This is why so many people appreciate you Wayne: you are such a special soul ❤️

  • @tammydietschweiler7852
    @tammydietschweiler7852 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I am 61 and don’t have wrinkles. I never smoked, drank, get alot of sleep and take vitamins with a healthy diet. I’ve never Sun bathed after the age of 19 and use simple lotions for dryness. I drink alot of water and try to avoid stress even tho I have some health issues that are troubling.
    I think we need to accept ourselves and do the best we can. I’m afraid to use fillers and other things since we can have reactions years later.
    Love yourself and others is enough to keep that glow of happiness that accounts for so much.
    I do take care of my teeth and admit to whitening them periodically and I lighten my hair which I like!

  • @DanielleNicoleMakeup
    @DanielleNicoleMakeup 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This might be my bias as a woman, but I feel like there is a greater societal pressure to look "young and beautiful" while men "age like fine wine." So many men want young women even in their 80s so there's that too. I believe aging is a gift but even I catch myself thinking oh I need to buy this anti aging this or that at times. You are wonderful Wayne 😊 Love your messaging for all people ❤

    • @DanielleNicoleMakeup
      @DanielleNicoleMakeup 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I also think it's both of the things you suggested as well as the workplace not valuing ppl as much. I don't believe it's all in our heads. That said, I don't feel that way about my partner ans visa versa, so I'm sure some of it is hyped up in our heads

  • @janinepannell
    @janinepannell ปีที่แล้ว

    I’m not I’m 65. Already there! Getting older is a blessing.

  • @s.6169
    @s.6169 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I completely hear what you're saying but I feel like women are given a much harder time when they age whereas men are often said to age better.

  • @Timeisirrelevant
    @Timeisirrelevant 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I used to think the same way. Then the hormones dropped and so did my body and face. Not doing anything about it, but I'm not happy.
    I'll check back when you're a bit older. 😆