Dallas: A Million Ways to Die in the NFC East

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 11 พ.ย. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 1.7K

  • @brianfox6044
    @brianfox6044 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2059

    This should be good. I miss days of our Steelers so this’ll have to do

    • @xaviersantana2367
      @xaviersantana2367 4 ปีที่แล้ว +182

      Hopefully he makes one as soon as the Steelers lose

    • @ccwhu
      @ccwhu 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      @@xaviersantana2367 this weekend then🗿🗿🗿

    • @xaviersantana2367
      @xaviersantana2367 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@ccwhu who do they play this weekend?

    • @SteintheKid
      @SteintheKid 4 ปีที่แล้ว +152

      @@xaviersantana2367 Yinz realize Days of our Steelers wasn't because of taking an L, it was made because the team with Bell Brown Porter etc was a circus behind the scenes. Since those three have been gone its been as close to radio silent as you can get beyond some goofiness by Juju on social media and that to this point is benign as possible.

    • @xaviersantana2367
      @xaviersantana2367 4 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      @@SteintheKid He was making Days of Our Steelers last season, too. Even after the drama. It became a shit post for when they lost. I think there was one game they lost that Days of Our Steelers didn't come out. Regardless, I hope we see some more of it next week.

  • @Janny890
    @Janny890 4 ปีที่แล้ว +268

    "They went all the way to Washington to kick a field goal" -Shannon Sharpe

  • @louiscallahan3720
    @louiscallahan3720 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1413

    "And Jerry Jones as Emperor Palpatine"
    OR
    "And Emperor Palpatine as Jerry Jones"
    Makes ya think

    • @logansheffield8641
      @logansheffield8641 4 ปีที่แล้ว +57

      We've never seen them in the same place at the same time.

    • @punkydamonkey989
      @punkydamonkey989 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      They are both just as incompetent as each other

    • @imusama1876
      @imusama1876 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      The real emperor palpatine is bill bellichick jerry is supreme leader snoke lol

    • @philly_sports1558
      @philly_sports1558 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      If you really think about it, Jerry Jones has only done one good thing in his entire career: The Herschel Walker trade. But that trade was such an obvious gift that ANYONE would have accepted it. The Vikings pretty much handed the Cowboys three Super Bowls on a silver platter. Since then, Jerry has been bungling the Cowboys for over two decades. They haven't even made the NFC Championship Game since 1996. They're an irrelevant mockery of what they were.

    • @prairiehawker
      @prairiehawker 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Nothing Changes in Dallas until Jerry's Lear jet slams into a Mountain with him aboard

  • @wolfchez4821
    @wolfchez4821 4 ปีที่แล้ว +409

    "Ben Dinucci, who the hell is that?"
    Sounds like a type of pasta

    • @goo5e785
      @goo5e785 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Leonardo Dinucci: The legendary artist who painted famous paintings such as the Mona Lisa.

    • @sergiowinter5383
      @sergiowinter5383 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Leonardo Dinucci: actor in Once Upon a Time in Dallas

    • @christophermedlin5889
      @christophermedlin5889 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I actually knew someone who played with Dinucci in college

    • @caps4thecup60
      @caps4thecup60 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@christophermedlin5889 at JMU or Pitt? Riley Stapleton?

    • @christophermedlin5889
      @christophermedlin5889 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@caps4thecup60 JMU

  • @vikrambansal1416
    @vikrambansal1416 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1380

    2018: DAYS OF OUR STILLERS & SACKSONVILLE ABBEY
    2019: THE GREATEST GAME & DAYS OF OUR STILLERS W/ D.I.V.A. PRESEASON SPECIAL
    2020: TONIGHT.... ON DALLAS!!!!

    • @noah_that_bills_fan1613
      @noah_that_bills_fan1613 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Hahahahaha it never gets old

    • @benwarner2940
      @benwarner2940 4 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      2018 don’t forget sacksonville abbey and falcons general hospital

    • @lucasblanton5203
      @lucasblanton5203 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      2021: Joe Burrow and the Bungles

    • @gauravagochiya4218
      @gauravagochiya4218 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@lucasblanton5203 Also don't forget about The Bold and the Broncos

    • @Bangbar30
      @Bangbar30 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      2019: D.I.V.A

  • @filmsanimations
    @filmsanimations 4 ปีที่แล้ว +326

    “The Culture is actually really damn good”

    • @bird_gang_az9598
      @bird_gang_az9598 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      A fellow Cards fan I see.

    • @IncredibleFulk1
      @IncredibleFulk1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      “We was catching them, unlike Agholor.”

    • @dj7707-n2g
      @dj7707-n2g 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Bruh i hate the cardinals, i think they are a cocky team.

  • @jordanfry5138
    @jordanfry5138 4 ปีที่แล้ว +740

    You know Tree's in his zone when he's comparing Mccarthy to Hitler and it's only 3 minutes in.

    • @burneveryabc
      @burneveryabc 4 ปีที่แล้ว +46

      I laughed way too hard at that

    • @thequietdreamer2186
      @thequietdreamer2186 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      And because this is 2020, I won’t be surprised if it’s leaked that someone in the front office was heard yelling about Steiner.

    • @Max0017
      @Max0017 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      LOL!

    • @krisgordon3116
      @krisgordon3116 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Nah. McCarthy isn't Hitler. That's Bill O'Brien cause Hopkins DOES NOT = Hernandez.

    • @meganb.2249
      @meganb.2249 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I think he might be barking up the wrong tree with that comparison.

  • @philly_sports1558
    @philly_sports1558 4 ปีที่แล้ว +235

    A wiseman once said: "Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard."
    That's been the motto of the Cowboys for the last 25 years.

    • @ChiefBlue4298
      @ChiefBlue4298 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Talent and hard work combined is an unstoppable duo

    • @Swoosh_015
      @Swoosh_015 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Wassup my dude!! Lol I’m glad you watch this too!

    • @ARUSApacecarHAMPTON
      @ARUSApacecarHAMPTON 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Well at least both Washington and Dallas can both say “we suck” But right now everybody in the NFC East sucks.

    • @Netsfan24
      @Netsfan24 ปีที่แล้ว

      that's KDs favorite quote

    • @NoPowerintheVerse
      @NoPowerintheVerse ปีที่แล้ว

      That's a great quote.

  • @kkrummelrhs
    @kkrummelrhs 4 ปีที่แล้ว +321

    "Tonight, on DALLAS!" might become the new Sacksonville Abbey at this rate

    • @ChiefBlue4298
      @ChiefBlue4298 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      It just might

    • @kkrummelrhs
      @kkrummelrhs 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@ChiefBlue4298 Surprised Philly has not been General Hospital this year or last year

    • @dnasty312
      @dnasty312 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      He did a little of that last year 😁

    • @GlobalWarmingSkeptic
      @GlobalWarmingSkeptic 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Perhaps Chef Ramsey and Lord Bortles will sign with the Cowboys.

    • @kkrummelrhs
      @kkrummelrhs 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@GlobalWarmingSkeptic Rams despite being in cap hell have to keep him

  • @buzzsburner.8286
    @buzzsburner.8286 4 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    Loved the weird and 70s intro music that made me think my headphones were broken. Truly an immersive experience

    • @bcubed72
      @bcubed72 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      "Dallas" Prime time soap opera theme song.

    • @kylerhuels05
      @kylerhuels05 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      unus annus

  • @jacobreid423
    @jacobreid423 4 ปีที่แล้ว +146

    Holy shit, two UT uploads in one day??? It’s an absolute miracle. Bless you Urinating Tree

    • @kkrummelrhs
      @kkrummelrhs 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Actually 3 in 24 hours

    • @cherrykatragadda9926
      @cherrykatragadda9926 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I think i just busy a nut from these videos

    • @sergiowinter5383
      @sergiowinter5383 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Corona give no break to sports and sports give no break to UTree

    • @jacob1107
      @jacob1107 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sportsball was delayed due to sponsor a few days

  • @johnenigma8506
    @johnenigma8506 4 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    As much as I want to laugh at Dallas and Jerry Jones, I find myself getting more pissed off every time I see the Jon Bostic hit on Andy Dalton. The fact that NONE of his teammates went to confront Bostic only adds to my wrath. What the hell did Dalton do to deserve that? indeed

  • @nahdissean
    @nahdissean 4 ปีที่แล้ว +273

    Jerry gives you death, taxes, and Jason Garrett still coaching
    He might be a bit more phat than usual but he's still with us in spirit.

    • @icarusmarioFAN
      @icarusmarioFAN 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Jason Garrett didn't get routinely blown out every week by teams of every level of quality.

    • @16ktsgamma
      @16ktsgamma 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      And he doesn't clap anymore.

    • @ashantianisha3567
      @ashantianisha3567 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Holy shit, two UT uploads in one day??? It’s an absolute miracle. Bless you Urinating Tree

  • @j.a.greene3523
    @j.a.greene3523 4 ปีที่แล้ว +281

    Consider Dallas' only two wins:
    To a Falcons team that literally can't hold a lead to save their life.
    To a Giants team that is in competition for worst team in New York... with the Jets.
    Those are your only two wins, and it's likely they'll be their only two wins.

    • @bigbearkat2010
      @bigbearkat2010 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Idk, they still have to play the Giants again and the Bengals at the end of the year.

    • @constantintorve2614
      @constantintorve2614 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      @@bigbearkat2010 New York beat themselves, and the Bungles at the current rate are gonna beat the Cowboys. They're not good, by any means, but they have a pulse. And an offense that can actually score. It's all you need to beat this Cowboys team.
      Honestly, I'd be surprised if the Cowboys finished better than 3-13.

    • @michaelbiscay9836
      @michaelbiscay9836 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      And the only reason they beat Atlanta was because they forgot they could pick up an onside kick.

    • @sweets7779
      @sweets7779 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Would not surprise me if Doug Pederson makes some even stupider play calling and we somehow lose to the Cowboys once

    • @toadofsteel
      @toadofsteel 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      The entire NFC East is bad. We collectively had 2 ENTIRE FUCKING WINS against teams outside the division in 17 games (plus that one tie game Philly had against the Bungles). Other than the Atlanta choke job you mentioned, the only other win was Philly beating up SF's 4th string team when the latter was all banged up.

  • @UHOH_415
    @UHOH_415 4 ปีที่แล้ว +484

    Somewhere in Los Angeles, Skip Bayless is crying himself to sleep while Shay Sharpe is laughing at the Cowboys.
    Along with the rest of the NFL Fanbase. Oh and how can I not forget about good ol Stephen A. Smith.

    • @darthvader3742
      @darthvader3742 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      Say it with me how bout them Cowboys

    • @rontheauraknight9606
      @rontheauraknight9606 4 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      @@darthvader3742 as a Name Redacted fan I have to say, I fairly pity Dak... the rest of the blowhards deserve it
      Also how about dem cowboys!

    • @darthvader3742
      @darthvader3742 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@rontheauraknight9606 this team won't go anywhere as long as Jerry Jones is in charge and unless the players actually start caring

    • @ffff832
      @ffff832 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Whatever

    • @rontheauraknight9606
      @rontheauraknight9606 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@darthvader3742 you say that like my team, the name redacted are also not in that same hell?

  • @ScooterMagruder
    @ScooterMagruder 4 ปีที่แล้ว +595

    :(((((((((((

  • @adamthespinygiant
    @adamthespinygiant 4 ปีที่แล้ว +349

    NY Giants are now hiring:
    1. A QB that knows the concept of “ball security”
    2. A TE that can consistently catch a ball.
    3. An offensive line that can block a paper bag from sacking said QB

    • @lizzybethnj617
      @lizzybethnj617 4 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      I'm a Giants fan too, aren't you loving the fact that Dallas is this bad

    • @adamthespinygiant
      @adamthespinygiant 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@lizzybethnj617 but not as constantly bad as us

    • @Xotin
      @Xotin 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      @@adamthespinygiant giants might be bad but at least you guys know when you’re bad. You have titles more recent than the cowboys that alone would arguably make the giants less of a poverty franchise than the cowboys. Cowboys think they’re better than everyone every season bc they’re called America’s team but they haven’t done anything worth while since years before I was born

    • @adamthespinygiant
      @adamthespinygiant 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@Xotin at least I’m not in denial. They always say confession is the first step to recovery.

    • @jeremyhubbard2908
      @jeremyhubbard2908 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      4. A QB
      5. A QB
      6. A QB

  • @zenfinity517
    @zenfinity517 4 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    You can tell just from the intro that Tree puts a lot of work and dedication in his vids. From one Yinzer to another, much respect.

  • @ajrivera1993
    @ajrivera1993 4 ปีที่แล้ว +237

    pauses video
    Me *a Cowboys fan*: Oh God, hold on lemme get a beer.
    plays video
    continue Tree...

    • @16ktsgamma
      @16ktsgamma 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      You are gonna need more than a beer. You better get the whiskey.

    • @ridgeplayz8906
      @ridgeplayz8906 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      As a fellow dallas fan, i can confidently say... I F*CKING HATE 2020

    • @griz8381
      @griz8381 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I would say sorry your seasons imploding and you’ve lost hope but it would fix the complete ineptitude

    • @ajrivera1993
      @ajrivera1993 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@16ktsgamma let me retort

    • @N54-s7r
      @N54-s7r 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Dude this team is making me so fucking depressed

  • @OcpCommunications
    @OcpCommunications 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    As a Cowboys fan, I congratulate you and thank you for this masterpiece. This was so much more satisfying than anything I have seen the past two weeks from this team.

  • @aperson9875
    @aperson9875 4 ปีที่แล้ว +78

    Finally, the sequel to Days of our Steelers

  • @louiscannon7264
    @louiscannon7264 4 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    I feel like the cowboys season can be described as, Our expectations were low but holy f***

  • @kaminsod4077
    @kaminsod4077 4 ปีที่แล้ว +105

    There's no hope for Dallas until the team's pryed from the cold, dead claws of jerry boy.

    • @sf7154
      @sf7154 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @SEAN GRIGSBY Idk if this is the worst they’ve ever been but your right it’s a shitshow. The early 2000’s were some dark years

    • @griz8381
      @griz8381 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Like most of the owners in this league

    • @kennethvalentine8901
      @kennethvalentine8901 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Emperor Palpatine never dies

  • @timothydavila844
    @timothydavila844 4 ปีที่แล้ว +63

    “Dontari Poe ate his way out of the program”
    LMAO Honestly thank good he was complete ass cheeks

    • @dw4867
      @dw4867 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      C'mon, that's not true. Clearly, he was also at least 50% belly as well.

    • @chrisuncleahmad666
      @chrisuncleahmad666 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Which is ironic for he once played in KC with all of Andy Reid's BBQ and became a fat guy touchdown legend.

    • @MrT571
      @MrT571 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Still an even bigger irony because the Boys had Nate Newton and Leonard Davis at their heaviest. Monsters tend to be good in Dallas.

    • @tsarbamba642
      @tsarbamba642 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      don't slander the greatest QB of all time like that

  • @mozata6838
    @mozata6838 4 ปีที่แล้ว +62

    This just in: UrinatingTree is now an honorary Sabol

    • @UrinatingTree
      @UrinatingTree  4 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      Now you're just trying to flatter me. I don't hold a candle to those legends.

    • @AnonymousMan115
      @AnonymousMan115 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@UrinatingTree Your still a better youtuber than most thats out there (1 channel I do recommend is Corpse Husband)

  • @standardofexcellence
    @standardofexcellence 4 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    The cowboys are literally the highschool qb who hasnt done anything relevent since highschool, or the 90's in this case

    • @corsojames
      @corsojames 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      The guy that hasn't done anything since highschool and still talks mad shit

    • @fsanmiguel666
      @fsanmiguel666 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@corsojames that guy must have some serious peaked in high school issues if he's still raving about his so called "glory days" that were high school, 20+ years later......

  • @Danielson81902IRL
    @Danielson81902IRL 4 ปีที่แล้ว +50

    This is soo perfect 8 minutes full of laughter for those that aren’t Cowboys fans😂😂😂

    • @crater044
      @crater044 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      By this point, Cowboys fans are laughing as well. Once pain has passed, laughter does tend to seep in. As a Cowboys fan, I'm done being furious about this season and now I just laugh.

    • @Danielson81902IRL
      @Danielson81902IRL 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@crater044 true

    • @Danielson81902IRL
      @Danielson81902IRL 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Wosocjrnsoso we you probably right

    • @peelysolo1478
      @peelysolo1478 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      :(

    • @Danielson81902IRL
      @Danielson81902IRL 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@StarkInvictus same here too man

  • @Razz415
    @Razz415 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Any day Jerruh suffers as owner and gm makes my day. Then add a Washington win, and man...what a day!

  • @thatguyperseus
    @thatguyperseus 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Days of our Steelers to Sacksonville to this
    Simply beautiful

  • @erics.czernecki7333
    @erics.czernecki7333 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    He should try to do one on the weekly traipsing of the Falcons.
    Call it "A Low Down Dirty Birds' Shame".

  • @viveknagarajan5514
    @viveknagarajan5514 4 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    Every cowboys fan: OMG this is our year! We got ceedee and trevon diggs!
    Me: bruh you guys traded for Joey Galloway. He was really good too.

    • @georgeblair3894
      @georgeblair3894 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Not one, but TWO number one picks.

    • @viveknagarajan5514
      @viveknagarajan5514 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@georgeblair3894 yeah

    • @malarie-susangold9259
      @malarie-susangold9259 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Me "Huh, Cowboys could be interesting. Not going to start out hot with no preseason but preseason is important"
      Me, now "This... isn't what I meant when I said interesting."

    • @viveknagarajan5514
      @viveknagarajan5514 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@malarie-susangold9259 exactly.

  • @Thelowestofthelowtiers
    @Thelowestofthelowtiers 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Andy Dalton:
    I'm free!I just got signed to Dallas where they have a great O-Li-
    Dallas O-Line:
    N O

    • @ladyfire44
      @ladyfire44 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Dalton:
      I wished I was still in Cincinnati. This is embarrassing.

  • @rhetteaton3765
    @rhetteaton3765 4 ปีที่แล้ว +133

    If the Cowboys win on Sunday, their fans will be like “We’re going to the Super Bowl!”

    • @ckendall67
      @ckendall67 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Michael Irvin will be bouncing off the walls if the 'Boys beat the Eagles Sunday night.

    • @rowdycmoore
      @rowdycmoore 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      They're as bad as Steeler fans that way.

    • @arielrangel7994
      @arielrangel7994 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Hahahahahahahah😐😐😐😐

    • @crater044
      @crater044 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      As a Cowboys fan, allow me to respond: No......no, we won't be saying "WE'RE GOING TO THE SUPER BOWL!!" Cowboys fans know that this year is a disaster.....we are already looking towards the end of the season. We will be saying, however, "Man the Eagles must REALLLLLY fucking suck if they lose this game to us" if we do win this game. If the Cowboys win......it's more of a loss for the Eagles than a victory for the Cowboys if a third string QB beats a team that won the SB just three years ago and their QB was being hailed as this fucking QB protegy with MVP caliber like abilities. Trust me.....if the Cowboys win.....Cowboys fans will be SHOCKED. I just hope Philadelphia doesn't burn itself to the ground if that was to happen.
      But it won't happen. Philadelphia, despite their injuries, are the better team and they have their starting QB playing. The Eagles SHOULD win this game easily.

    • @jakehighley8037
      @jakehighley8037 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@crater044 bro as a eagles fan they should win but I have a feeling they won’t

  • @towasinakindele
    @towasinakindele 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    Usually, it's fun to laugh at Cowboy misery, but the injury to Dak makes it suck. Wishing him a speedy and fully healthy recovery

    • @politicallycorrectredskin796
      @politicallycorrectredskin796 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      But it was just his foot. He's got another one and should stop whining. Compare that to the amount of merriment his injury has unleashed and I think it was definitely worth it. The Cowboys would not be half this funny if he hadn't been injured. You always have to look at the pros and cons of everything.

    • @politicallycorrectredskin796
      @politicallycorrectredskin796 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Wes Takahashi Nah, you have to take the cap situation into account. He'll probably be kicking himself the rest of his life that he turned Jerruh's offer last year down, because the cap is falling again now because of the election-year flu hysteria going on.
      40 mill per year or whatever he was asking made sense before when the cap was rising annually. But you can't even consider it if the cap is going to drop every year going forward. You could sign high recently, specifically because you could depend on the annual cap rises between 2013 and 2019. Now that's gone. New situation.
      If I was Dak I would immediately fire my agent who was clearly oblivious to the change all offseason while Jerruh was not. Always look at the cap to understand contract negotiations in the NFL.

    • @politicallycorrectredskin796
      @politicallycorrectredskin796 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Wes Takahashi Yes, but the same problem is there if his agent keeps asking for too much. The market has flipped, and teams will go cheap regardless to prevent crippling themselves. No one will pay an exorbitant, inflated and antiquated cap number for Dak.
      You'll see. They will all rather take their chances on a draft prospect than pay Dak anything close to what he was being offered a year ago.
      He just missed the boat because of the sniffles-recession, and is going to have to humble himself to get a contract now. Sucks, but economics > ego. I guess he could wait it out, but then he would risk becoming irrelevant. It might even never happen, and this is just how the market is now.
      The cap went from 113 million in 2013 to 225 million last year. It's already down, and is being staggered in order to not ruin teams. But we don't know how low it'll go. If it goes down to 2013 levels eventually, then QB salaries will follow, meaning 10-15 million per year deals even for high caliber starters. Nowhere near the 40 mill they could command before the covid hysteria.

    • @kingofcrows8829
      @kingofcrows8829 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@politicallycorrectredskin796 Thanks for making our fanbase look petty af. That was a gruesome injury and there wasn't shit funny about it.

    • @politicallycorrectredskin796
      @politicallycorrectredskin796 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@kingofcrows8829 Oh stop it. The entire world has cried more than enough over Dak's foot already. I prefer to move past the not only low hanging fruit, but fruit that is actually rotting on the ground. people have already cried on TV. Know how many injuries I've sat through without anyone crying on TV about it? he twisted his ankle. Boohoo.
      Besides, what's this about us? I'm a Redskins fan. Last time I checked, that team no longer exists. Now I don't follow the NFL anymore. in fact I want it burned to the ground so a new, proper football league can be established on its ashes.

  • @unownthequestioning8666
    @unownthequestioning8666 4 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    As an Eagles fan, I waited all my life for this.

    • @sethdavis3046
      @sethdavis3046 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      @A Champion shitting on the cowboys will always be our one true joy

    • @tristane7513
      @tristane7513 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      As a cowboys fan im right there with you, since the 90s we've been overrated, Carter being a piss poor starter, Romo botching the field goal vs seatle, '07 vs the giants need i say more, this whole season(those points don't even scratch the surface just ones i popped in my head while writing this). I would love to see this as a regular show here on tree's channel.

    • @unownthequestioning8666
      @unownthequestioning8666 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @A Champion Its the cowboys. I know the eagles suck, but they had Superbowl ambitions and it impolded worse than what the eagles did in 2011.

    • @donaldrailedurmom6264
      @donaldrailedurmom6264 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @A Champion the eagles are just injured, Dallas is too. What does that have to do with anything

    • @TheBlazersfan22
      @TheBlazersfan22 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      As a fantasy football user... sees the philli d core playing the cowboys... pressed claim for those delicious points.

  • @Spamus
    @Spamus 4 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    Cowboys: dying of indigestion and insanity
    Washington: suffering from a total loss of identity
    Giants: growing pains bad enough to send them to the ER (with corona to boot)
    Eagles: drunkenly stumbling around with broken bones and synesthesia, as per usual

  • @Scrubs2562
    @Scrubs2562 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    I am stunned by how good this is

  • @6lemans10
    @6lemans10 4 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    After 24 years, Dallas fans are finally starting to FACE REALITY.

    • @isaactorres7525
      @isaactorres7525 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Believe me, most of us have known this team is going no where with Jerry for years

    • @RoadrunnerMoose
      @RoadrunnerMoose 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@isaactorres7525 Exactly, 25 years (quarter century) since the last SB, of the 25 years, 10 playoff appearances and none of them go past the Divisonal round.

    • @6lemans10
      @6lemans10 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@RoadrunnerMoose Dallas a had great defense and offensive line in recent years. No excuses.

    • @nightblade1190
      @nightblade1190 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@6lemans10 Great defense? The defense has always been ass. The only reason our defense was decent in 2018 and I think 2019 was because we had that one guy Kris Richard who they for some reason got rid of. Other than that it's always been straight ass cheeks.

    • @6lemans10
      @6lemans10 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@nightblade1190 Ha. I'm going 8 years back on the great defense. Remember Damarcus Ware?

  • @BOS_C.O.
    @BOS_C.O. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Glad that even with the Empire finally meeting it's demise, teams like the Cowboys and Falcons will always be there to put a smile on my face.

  • @tstahler5420
    @tstahler5420 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I'm a lifelong Cowboys fan and I laughed hard at this. Thank you, I needed that.

    • @otaviofrnazario
      @otaviofrnazario 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I think for y'all is either this or planning terrible harm to Jerry

  • @77AussieRulz
    @77AussieRulz 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    That hit on Dalton was exactly the same hit that Luck got two years ago and I know for a fact that at least got one game suspension for it

  • @joshsimpson79
    @joshsimpson79 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I don’t think I’ve heard this theme song in decades. Heard it all the time when my parents would watch it when I was a kid. Smiled the whole video. Great job..

  • @bigussmokesus8866
    @bigussmokesus8866 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    3 videos in a day, I’m in heaven

  • @johnnyroberts3761
    @johnnyroberts3761 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Oh man, this show has been one of my favorites over the last 25 years. Never gets old either.

  • @samuelyuan291
    @samuelyuan291 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    my recommendations are faster than my notifications lol

  • @beng1642
    @beng1642 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I hope this series keeps going. It sure helps when waiting on the new season of Days of our Steelers that'll inevitably come one day.

  • @1991petrolhead
    @1991petrolhead 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    Last time I was this early the Leafs were in the playoffs.

    • @ckendall67
      @ckendall67 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Last time I was this early the Leafs actually won a playoff series.

    • @somehistorynerd
      @somehistorynerd 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Last time I was this Early, Hitler could draw well.

    • @jimmyjones5717
      @jimmyjones5717 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Last time I was this early the Leafs won their last Stanley Cup ever so far.

  • @LegendaryDorkKnight
    @LegendaryDorkKnight ปีที่แล้ว +5

    As an Eagles fan, I hope Jerry Jones never dies. His hubris and arrogance has allowed the other teams in the NFC East to flourish and thrive.

  • @txbased1659
    @txbased1659 4 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    This team is the same every year. Lots of hype but when it comes time, they wet the bed.

    • @bigbearkat2010
      @bigbearkat2010 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      And then the fans say next year is the year and it was all the refs fault anyway.

    • @shabushabu5319
      @shabushabu5319 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      They shart* the bed

    • @delta-vk1me
      @delta-vk1me 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Cowboy fans have low iq

  • @motnurky7055
    @motnurky7055 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    "This is like Tom Brady to Brandon Weedon!"
    Tree plz dont remind me of the 2015 season when we lost Romo and went 4-12

  • @AlucardMM
    @AlucardMM 4 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    Texas has produced so many Qbs over the recent years but jerry can’t find one? Tf? Kyler Murray Matthew Stafford like bruh 😭

    • @palehorse6655
      @palehorse6655 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Detroit had two of the most talented skill position players I have ever seen and they both retired because Detroit killed their passion for the game

    • @daleftuprightatsoldierfield
      @daleftuprightatsoldierfield 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@palehorse6655 can’t have shit in Detroit

    • @sf7154
      @sf7154 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Talos Jets?

    • @johnenigma8506
      @johnenigma8506 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      You're right. Texas is among other things, A FOOTBALL STATE. Football is practically a religion in Texas. Especially COLLEGE FOOTBALL. Jerry Jones could've practically drafted one of these people in 25 years. If there's ever a person that could be used as the poster boy for toxic Ego, Jerry Jones would be it.

    • @GundamGokuTV
      @GundamGokuTV 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Andy Dalton is a good QB. So is Dak. QB is not there issue. It's that OL that has said QBs running for there fucking lives. You win games in the trenches. OL and DL are the most important parts of football. A good OL makes a mediocre QB look good.

  • @Nurhaal
    @Nurhaal 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I hope to see more of this. It actually made me laugh and gave me a reason to watch Dallas in short doses.

  • @georgeblair3894
    @georgeblair3894 4 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    What's been the constant since 1995? Jerry Jones.

    • @ckendall67
      @ckendall67 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      He's been their owner longer than that( since 1989 ), but yeah.

    • @ChiefBlue4298
      @ChiefBlue4298 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@ckendall67 when he fired Jimmy Johnson, that was the beginning of the end

    • @crazyluigi6664
      @crazyluigi6664 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@ChiefBlue4298 Tom Landry?

    • @sagaswp
      @sagaswp 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Daniel Snyder tips his fedora at you sir.

  • @solglow2359
    @solglow2359 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Genius! You should do a weekly series exposing my Chicago Bears for our offensive woes. Call it: 'The Bear Minimum'. Or you can do a parody of that 70's movie 'Bad News Bears' and even use the Care Bears theme song.

  • @tyroland06
    @tyroland06 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    As a Cowboys fan, I can say from the bottom of my heart that this team sucks, especially without Dak. (Also we have a 7th-round pick from this year's draft under center now, so that's not helping.) We deserve to be made fun of. Tree does it perfectly in a style that only he can master. Keep it up!

  • @rolandrodriguez9594
    @rolandrodriguez9594 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Wether your own team or someone elses, your roasting ability is a site to behold. Keep these up. I love humor in commentary.

  • @thingbing3092
    @thingbing3092 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    After watching us get our shit wrecked by the *NAME REDACTED* I'm starting to think 4-12 would be a miracle season.

  • @DonovanFlamingusIII
    @DonovanFlamingusIII 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    I’ve been waiting all day for this beautiful piece of work. As one southwestern Pennsylvanian to another, I thank you for putting my feelings into permanent video form so I may look upon it every time I get optimistic about the Dallas Cowboys chances. Love you, Tree. Keep it up, old friend.

  • @flavortown4141
    @flavortown4141 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Last time I was this early, Dallas still had a quarterback

  • @chrisjourdan344
    @chrisjourdan344 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Tree! You are a Genius for this!
    It's more than "Days of Our Steelers" here.
    Next: The Washington Football Team in "Designated Survivors"

  • @scottdukes7585
    @scottdukes7585 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    TONIGHT....ON DALLAS!!!! Established January 29th, 1996. The day after the Cowboys won the Super Bowl.

  • @ejones293
    @ejones293 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This type of content gets me through my hellacious weeks of college. Thanks, Tree

  • @sethdavis3046
    @sethdavis3046 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Havent been this early since Days of Our Steelers was a thing

  • @matthewshortle5274
    @matthewshortle5274 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    And now we need a "Days of our Steelers" and "Dallas" crossover in Week 9

  • @DeevoC
    @DeevoC 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    This man, out here making quality content, by god.

  • @thenumberquelve158
    @thenumberquelve158 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I love it. Dallas, being Dallas, lets >21,000 people into the stadium during a pandemic, only for them all to cry for a couple hours.
    I see this as an absolute win.

  • @Idiodyssey87
    @Idiodyssey87 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    "Burfictian." I like it.

  • @patrickdabs
    @patrickdabs 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The Dallas theme song is old enough that I think most people missed the reference you made in the intro.

    • @velikynovgorod4358
      @velikynovgorod4358 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      That theme song that played sounded like it could come out of the 80's or 90's. Would be great if it came from the 90's just for the irony.

  • @Megalopros
    @Megalopros 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    nitpick: if you wanted to capture that Dallas opening reference you should have used "Starring in alphabetical order" this admittedly leaves jerry boy in the middle instead of the end, but you get my point

  • @Cadrid
    @Cadrid 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    4:44 "Even Swiss cheese could absorb a few attacks on its luscious, creamy exterior."
    If this channel ever gets shut down, you could make a living writing sandwich erotica.

  • @HugeStan920
    @HugeStan920 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Me: studies for my test
    Tree: Uploads
    Me: Studying can wait.

  • @shoshoncaligula5512
    @shoshoncaligula5512 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I live for this. Such premium content.

  • @voltingmaster5458
    @voltingmaster5458 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    NFC East: The Dumpster Fire Division!

    • @otaviofrnazario
      @otaviofrnazario 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      The Tank Division. He called it on the latest edition of This Week in Sportsball

    • @MikeTheKoopaWarrior
      @MikeTheKoopaWarrior 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      THE SUPER TANK DIVISION!

    • @crystalmartins8214
      @crystalmartins8214 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      RACE FOR LAST PLACE IN THE DIVISION!

  • @robwalsh69420
    @robwalsh69420 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Calling Jerry Jones as Emperor Palpatine is an insult to Palpatine

  • @1billdorito
    @1billdorito 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    This is gonna give Sacksonville Abbey and Days of our Steelers a run for their money

  • @BJBlaskovichGaming
    @BJBlaskovichGaming 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I wanna know how Tree doesn’t get copyright claims on the music.

  • @cadensmith7626
    @cadensmith7626 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    They should move the NFC east to the XFL

    • @ckendall67
      @ckendall67 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Or the AAF.

    • @otaviofrnazario
      @otaviofrnazario 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      AAU. They're amateurs at this point

    • @insertcolorherehawk3761
      @insertcolorherehawk3761 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      or split them into the divisions of the GFL

    • @jimmyjones5717
      @jimmyjones5717 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      The XFL already has enough problems, send the NFC East to whatever the worst football league is

    • @insertcolorherehawk3761
      @insertcolorherehawk3761 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jimmyjones5717 I think sending them to Ireland is a bit much, Germany perhaps?

  • @kevaninthe4135
    @kevaninthe4135 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    The NFC East needs to be barred from the playoffs this year.

    • @joesakic91
      @joesakic91 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I'll be stunned if there's a 6-10 NFC East winner winning a playoff game. I'll eat crow if a 6-10 NFC East winner makes it to the NFC Championship Game. I'll eat an ostrich or emu if a 6-10 NFC East winner makes the Super Bowl. I'll eat an albatross if a 6-10 NFC East winner wins the Super Bowl.

  • @Awolfx
    @Awolfx 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    Welcome to the NFC East: Abandon all hope ye who enter here.

  • @ricardocolyersanchez3534
    @ricardocolyersanchez3534 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    “Burfictian” is my new favorite word

  • @evilpez
    @evilpez 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Two UT uploads and one of them is bashing Dallas? A true Wednesday blessing!

  • @dvtnadekola5343
    @dvtnadekola5343 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This dude always brightens my day
    Keep it up

  • @ManEFresh
    @ManEFresh 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    My new favorite segment. But why not the "Western" voice you had in past years?

  • @devfree4117
    @devfree4117 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    God bless you for these two uploads

  • @SteeleZack
    @SteeleZack 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    One year into McCarthy's tenure, and all ready the players want him fired, that is awful.

    • @ryanahr2267
      @ryanahr2267 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @cpk1994 The difference is that, in Dallas, he came into a team full of players that had been so poorly coached, managed and owned for so long that they literally had to hope that McCarthy would basically bring an overnight turnaround. He hasn't gotten close and the talent in Dallas wants to just get out while they still can to play for a team that contend. Dallas is gonna be in serious trouble for a very long time.

    • @C-Lightning
      @C-Lightning 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @cpk1994 exactly!

  • @dbakes6164
    @dbakes6164 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    On next week episode on
    “Why am I watching this” we have the injured Eagles playing the inj- well just the Cowboys

  • @KleinpeterHank
    @KleinpeterHank 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    More like: DallASS
    *Send Comment*

  • @bdavis6115
    @bdavis6115 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    When Tree says “Ill save this for another video” in sportball, you know its gonna be good

  • @rontheauraknight9606
    @rontheauraknight9606 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Omg earliest I’ve been here, and I love him shitting on the cowboys as a Washington Redacted fan

    • @Jack-cv7pl
      @Jack-cv7pl 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      The football team

    • @davidtuttle7556
      @davidtuttle7556 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Its Washington Team Football. WTF

    • @rontheauraknight9606
      @rontheauraknight9606 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@davidtuttle7556 he made the joke calling them the “Name redacted” and the “Washington redacted” before on this channel... geez

    • @davidtuttle7556
      @davidtuttle7556 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@rontheauraknight9606 As a fellow fan of the Team Formerly Known As The Redskins, it is my goddam right to call them Washington Team Football. It's not like we haven't been yelling WTF!?! for decades.

  • @killerzz226
    @killerzz226 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    The Italian restaurant is now your QB Dallas😂

  • @HolyHandGrenade.
    @HolyHandGrenade. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    "you flew all the way to washington to kick a filed goal!"-Shannon Sharpe

  • @johnpoole3871
    @johnpoole3871 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is my new favorite show. May it get five seasons and a movie

  • @bohba13
    @bohba13 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    So. Dallas, how's Mike doin for ya'
    -signed a Packers fan.

    • @griz8381
      @griz8381 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      As much as I dislike the packers it’s even better to see the cowboys implode like this, I’m looking forward to seeing 5-11 team in the playoffs, or have their playoffs given to another NFC west team

    • @griz8381
      @griz8381 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Kevin Johnson because I’m a Seahawks fan and a masochist

    • @bohba13
      @bohba13 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @cpk1994 why'd you have to remind me of that Seattle game.
      also, Mike's issue is he hasn't adapted to the league.

    • @bohba13
      @bohba13 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Kevin Johnson dude, chill.,

    • @bohba13
      @bohba13 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @cpk1994 dude, he had a massive colapse in GB, with a QB who basically played in it his whole career, and the only reason that it haddn't blown up before then was because said qb was a transcendent talent. notice that once Mike left, GB had been doing far better on both sides of the ball with very similar personnel. I've been a GB fan since 2010. Mike is the problem. while the complexity might also be the problem, it;s up to mike to simplify his offence to compensate. so again, it falls back to him.

  • @jackburton9653
    @jackburton9653 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This is a fucking work of art! Never mind that I’m a cowboys fan.. this is a goddamn masterpiece!👨🏽‍🎨

  • @WFAforall
    @WFAforall 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Wait....WAIT THIS IS THE NEW SEASOK OF DAYS OF OUR STEELERS BUT NOW
    "Days of our cowboys"

    • @rileyblack7160
      @rileyblack7160 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yeah but we already have a soap opera called Dallas, it's perfect

    • @Deagnetic
      @Deagnetic 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Or
      "DALLAS KITCHEN NIGHTMARES WITH GORDAN RAMSAY?"

  • @NatureB3
    @NatureB3 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You had me at the intro! Best work of 2020!

  • @joshburaczewski110
    @joshburaczewski110 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    When Jerry Jones walked in with a mask on, I seriously thought it was Bernie sanders

    • @C-Lightning
      @C-Lightning 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      😂 😂 😂 😂

  • @Swaggernaut_X
    @Swaggernaut_X 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    What song is that around 2:17, im sure its from a Sega game but I can't recall which one?

  • @marvinfootpenis819
    @marvinfootpenis819 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    The Yinzer will roast me and my team. It was our time amd we will like it.

  • @timomastosalo
    @timomastosalo 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    An epic opening - just missing the split screens :) Do the following Dallas episodes with this music (and use the split screens).
    Now, cones the daunting task of finding the equally fitting songs for the others.
    Here are a few suggestions, in the order of appearance in the NFL homepage (feel free to add):
    - Seahawks: Frazier
    - Cardinals: John Wayne (Lady Gaga)
    - Rams: Los Angeles (Sugarcult)
    - 49ers: Bonanza
    - Eagles: Rocky (I know - predictable, but)
    - Washington: TV test sounds
    * - Cowboys: Dallas theme
    - Giants: New York, New York (Sinatra)
    - Packers: Happy Days (OK - that's for Milwaukee, but let it play)
    - Bears: Married... with Children (With clips of Al Bundy in full gear)
    - Lions: Motown Song (Rod Stewart)
    - Vikings: How to Train Your Dragon theme aka Flying
    - Buccaneers: Pirates of the Caribbean theme
    - Saints: Take Me to the Mardi Gras
    - Panthers: Sweet Caroline
    - Falcons: Georgia on my Mind (Ray Charles)
    - Buffalo: Buffalo Soldier
    - Dolphins: Flipper
    - Patriots: Top Gun
    - Jets: Jetsons
    - Titans: Davy Crockett theme (ahem - only till the refrain is sang through the 1st time. Then it goes to Indian wars gently as a Gatling gun)
    - Colts: Sounds of the Indy races (with comments)
    - Texans: Raw Hide
    - Jaguars: Jungle Book (Mowgli) theme (maybe just the whistling part?)
    - Steelers: The Dahntahn Song
    - Ravens: Good Morning Baltimore
    - Browns: Lassie
    - Bengals: Flintstones
    - Chiefs: Kansas City - no, you played that already after the SB. Just play some bullets and arrows flying by from a Western movie.
    - Raiders: The Wanderer (Dion)
    - Broncos: Fury
    - Chargers: Desperado, Canción del Mariachi (Antonio Banderas & Los Lobos)
    (* check)