Thank you Danish for sharing your experience. It must have been hard to express and relive the dark moments! I have been watching you for some time and I really appreciate all your wisdom and decision to share and help everyone. I wish you a peaceful healing journey and great future ahead.
hi i would just like to say i am so proud of you for how far you've come, you're an inspiration and thank you for this video, i hope i can do what you did one day.
a narcissist's worst nightmare is an educated empath. the gig is up at that point. and they'll discard you quickly. but you'll know the truth. and they'll hate you for it. in my lived experience, emotionally abusive narcissists will lose their minds if empaths do these 10 things: 1. let them know you're onto them 2. remain completely non-reactive 3. radical honesty, accept them for who they are. 4. treat them with indifference 5. rejection 6. exposure 7. unfavorable comparisons, compare the narcissist to normal, good people's behaviours 8. ignore them 9. get happy with your own activities 10. establish and maintain no-contact. cheers from southern ontario, canada 🍁
44 years for me. 10 years ago I finally saw what he was called - A Narcissist. Everything started making sense. My supernova moment was this past April, I said, " Either start living up to your marriage vows, or follow through with your constant threats of divorce. I can't live like this anymore." He divorced me. Praise God! Finally free and I can sleep peacefully again for the first time in 10 years.
Perfectly explained, Danish. Only those who have gone through such abuse truly understand. Going No Contact, calling their obnoxious behaviour out and defending your boundaries is not becoming like them. Intentions and context matter. Thanks for sharing your own experiences with us. Keep shining 🙏🏻💖🌟
I found out the hard way more than once how important it is to be careful when it comes to calling that kind of behavior out instead of running for the hills right away while going no contact.
@@francesbernard2445 it's important to be careful indeed. Depending on the narcissist and circumstances, not all of them can be called out. Safety is priority over anything else.
@@carparthero yep. Many times I had to bite my tongue where circumstances were not in my favour, for instance when the narcissist was my boss but because she was moved to another department she was not my boss anymore and once she started messing with me, that's it. Confronted calling her out immediately. She couldn't talk and never messed with me again. Narcissists are cowards hiding behind their fake image. Cheers 🌟
@@a.williams.scorpiopower i love hearing empowering stories of people standing up for themselves. great job there with the ex-boss. the workplace is def a political landmine and caution is necessary at times. good on you for calling out her bullshit. keep fighting the good fight. -all the best, steven
People with compassionate empathy can never turn dangerous but the try to destroy narcissistic false self and fragile ego with truth. They can’t turn into dark empaths which I keep hearing because they live a conscious living with moral values and a strong inner critic assessing right or wrong for themselves, for others and in a situation. I am not sure what this dark Empath is all about. Narcissistic people can turn empathy on or off based on situations and how it benefits them whereas empaths feel empathy even for narcissistic people despite their abuse. Empaths learn to set boundaries for self sanity and self preservation, which is required.
A supernova empath may be confused for a narcissist. This because of the cold indifferent response to a narcissists crybaby victim act. Onlookers who only see the surface fall for the theatric but the empath sees right through the sheep-skin layer, looks right at the wolf in the eye saying "nice try".
They won't ever see the failings. That's the irritating bit. They don't fail until their last breath though because there's always some idiot who believes their BS. They just need one.
❤When it comes to narcissists- they are one of the big reasons He is stepping in right now!🔥💪♥ He is coming to avenge! 👉Innocent go first- all the children of the world will disappear first then the adult believers.🥰 Jesus is coming back to pick up all those who accepted free gift of His death for their sins. Yes, after 2 000 years He is coming back with promised salvation!🙌♥🥳 As He speaks through the prophets He is sickened by the world: lies, abuse amd manipulations. Before He comes we will see Alaska's back to back earthquakes 7.6 and 7.3, we will also see Germany and Russia exchanging missiles. Jesus spoke of it all through his prophets! 🙌❤😊 Jesus removes His believers and then Apocalypse starts, do not be left for that! 🥹❤You can still call out to Him when kids are gone! Make sure you make Jesus your Lord and Saviour🙌❤He loves you like crazy! He sees you, ♥ 😍 Trust in what He did on the cross for you! He died for our sins and defeated the death by rising 3 days later! 🙌❤🥹 👉We are about to see Russia attacking Germany, Alaska experiencing two devastating earthquakes (magnitude 7.6 and 7.3) and the fall of Freemason Temple in Philadelphia.🙌 👉Only God knows the future. Jesus has now revealed all those details to his prophets right now! 👉CHILDREN will disappear around the world, then His true believers! Jesus promised 2 000y ago that He will come back for everybody who accepted His payment ( His death) for all sins. He will literally pull us out of this world so that we don't have to stay for the Judgment ( the Apocalypse). You can still call out to Him to save you after kids are gone, He will rescue you too❤ Make sure to make Jesus your Lord and Saviour🙌❤He loves you like crazy! He sees you❤🥹 What saves us is trust in what He did on the cross: He died for our sins and then defeated the death by rising 3 days later! He made it very simple, He has done it all for us so don't add anything to it! 🙌❤🥹
“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.” ― Sun Tzu, The Art of War Narcs don't know their enemies true characteristics and they don't self reflect to know themselves. They are doomed from the beginning. It's just like chess. Sometimes the game is played out fully even though you both know the end.
Isn't funny how we are opposites attract narcs in that we love truth sayers even unafraid to be ones, narcs shrink and hide from the truth, talk about unable to handle themselves well!
I can relate. It’s like a switch flips. You literally can’t physically,, emotionally, spiritually mentally tolerate it anymore. Mine was different I completely shut down like a vampire had sucked me dry one last time. It wasn’t calculated it just happened. Very hard to describe but call it beyond numb. Later able to see in a text message exactly who they were. Projection, projection, projection. To set up a storyline for their image. I let go of how it should be and saw what it truly was. My body wouldn’t allow it to continue.
After a point, the things you're willing to lose are no longer worth it. That's what the switch is, a revaluation, a willingness to lose what the abuser is holding as a form of ransom for your submission. Every time a victim has their big fuckit moment, they're throwing their cards on the table and the abuser has to put up or shut up. Many times, it's revealed they were a paper tiger, and the threats of retaliation or destruction were just headgames, other times, they "pull the pin" on their revenge grenade. Either way, their target is already gone, and all that remains is a new person who can't be harmed in the same way anymore, because they don't care about the repercussions. They're past it.
At first, going no contact 8 months ago was difficult. I felt doubt, guilt , fear anxiety and many more mixed emotions. There was much to learn about this abuse. I watched the abuser after no contact and they reacted just as a narcissist would. Observing the behavior after I went no contact helped a great deal. Much of what you mentioned in your videos has occurred for the past almost 60 years. Today I'm not only following through with my no contact, I have to after realizing all the damage this family member has done. It is just natural for me not to ever turn back. I just plain and simple naturally could not do it even if I wanted to make myself for peace at losing others manipulated by her lies .I'm getting the hoovering, campaign smear and so on. I've stayed silent to the smear. If I ever get a chance to defend myself, It will be when we are not alone. There will have to be people there that she has worked to ruin my reputation with. If I never get that chance that's okay too. I'm feeling pretty strong even though I have a ways to go in healing. I'm feeling like a super empath. I absolutely love falling in love with who I am and who I have always been. Kind, loving and compassionate. A gift to others and much more really. Thank you for sharing your experience with other victims. God bless.
Oh yeah, you get pushed too far and one day, BOOM! A person can only take so much, and Empaths take on so much more than most people do when it comes to abuse. This is why the explosion finally happens. And yes, it is an absolutely horrible experience. Not something in our nature to do. I was literally on my back for days after....could not move. Much LOVE❤❤❤
It just happened to me with my narcissistic mother 2 days ago. It takes YEARS to push me to that point, but I screamed at the top of my lungs when she pretended to care and asked why I was crying. Of course, gaslighting, denial and fake empathy followed for the next several hours and I still feel like I was hit by a train
I went Supernova on my Narcissist Dad years ago. He called me at my lowest point and tried to use it to put me down and it turned me into something I've never been before. I unloaded on him with so much energy it was like he was paralyzed and actually didn't interrupt me. Well he tried once and I shut him down. Being a Marine I was free to use all the terrible language in my vocabulary. He is a self riotous minister that was in complete shock that I would ever talk to him this was. I has to stand my ground and let him know he was wrong and his lies would never describe me as this bad person he tried to make me be. This evil negativity must not be tolerated and he knew he finally pushed me over the edge. Sad thing, is that he is still a Narcissist, but he knows he doesn't hold power over me anymore. ❤
I relate. My ex had already left me but only a couple of weeks later, he was visiting with our son, and he started a fight with me. He tried to stand over me, when I stood up and threatened the police. It was like I physically pushed him: he fell on the couch and went all small, his whole demeanour changed. He again tried to manipulate me further but I stood square in front of him, and said “I see you. I know who you really are.” He freaked out, he started shaking and crying, talking about his childhood trauma. I just kept saying “I know what you’re doing.” “Your manipulation no longer works with me”. To everyone he is a very strong man, but I remember feeling so shocked at how much he crumbled that evening. Since then, I don’t feel so afraid of him. I’m finding my strength as the weeks go by.
Am going through this process myself, after escaping a 29-year marriage with a truly toxic narcissist who nearly destroyed me. Thank you for making these videos. They have been very helpful.
don’t feel sorry or blame yourself, because anyone could fall for the charm of a narcissist. but going forward, once you see it and understand what it is, you need to go no contact immediately. if you have to interact with a toxic person, then go grey rock. all the best in your healing journey.
@@User-t3g3x not a big religion guy. jesus helps people that help themselves lol. narcissism is a heart-attack serious matter. there's tons of resources on YT and FB, for serious people who are willing to do the work to learn and apply the knowledge.
You are so right we all can make mistakes but it’s something wrong with grown people who are performing criminal acts against another and teaching this to their own children allowing their children to do their bidding for them all the while laughing and calling it righteous is down right the worst kind of evil I have ever witnessed in my life.
I love what you said about the narcissist feeling ENTITLED to our empathy. That is such a good point and we should remember that when someone is trying to gain our sympathy, especially when it's for something stupid that they created themselves when it could have easily prevented, if only they had common sense. That irritates me to no end. My coworker complained to me that she's sooo tired because she worked the overnight shift and went to the beach all day and had to work again. Raspy voice and all to emphasize just how tired she was. I responded with 'well, I would've skipped the beach then' and walked away. What I really wanted to say was 'so you expect me to feel sorry for you because you didn't go home and go to bed'? She definitely wanted me to say 'aww that's a shame' to give her a nice blast of fuel but I wouldn't do it. Too many incidents with this woman and now I ignore and avoid her at work, no thank you to that nonsense.... 🙄
I sent the Narc a letter calmly calling him out on everything and told him I don’t need or want him in my life and said I don’t want a reply , wished him well. He raged at me in a text , I never responded and blocked him. Good riddance
This has been heavily on my mind. I want to do this with my father. We already have fairly low contact but starting communicating more. After being vulnerable with him I caught him trying to manipulate me. I also saw how he talked bad about his ex, in the same way he did my mom. And my siblings just enabled his behavior. It’s a no for me. I’m getting out immediately. The only issue is he knows where I live.
@@Doit_becomeit1228write the letter and burn it. The Narcissist will show everyone the letter and use it against you. If you must write the letter, don't share it. Destroy it.
@@herelieskittythomas3726 people who take the side of the narcissist were already looking for an excuse to go against you. as long as the letter is polite, firm and factual, i would write it. narcs hate being called out. well, if you don't like it done to you, don't do it to others.
My sister buys things I never wanted and gives them to me, or takes me out to a spa day and says “ my treat” I didn’t fall for it this time because she said this before..you owe me a favor because I paid for your dining table set, or I took you to get a spa treatment with me and I was kind enough to do that for you. No… it’s using that as leverage down the road and to tell other people I’m ungrateful for her kind gestures. I kept saying no, I can pay for my own things… i can tell she was getting upset under her breath. Never take any offers from a narc.
I just CALLED OUT one in my life one week ago. She was pure evil and she think of ways to "rub salts on my wounds" intentionally. I told her directly on the face that "You did everything on purpose!" and just walked off. Thinking back, if not for that day, I didn't know that I was so strong. I finally realized that she worth NOTHING from me.
This is me right now. Just pushed back with every bit of remaining energy left in me, after which all other energy is diverted to leaving. Leaves you feeling like you've wrestled a beast, continuously, for years on end.
I once said to my nex in an argument that he is just like his father and from that moment all hell broke loose in the house. So be carefull when you do this!🙏🏽
I made this mistake too. Now I just push to have them draw the conclusion themselves and that's far more satisfying even though you will still get blamed.
As much as we are healing listening to you, i feel you too need the healing as we do. I'm not aware about the exact dynamics, but if you've taken this step, leaving one's parents, it needs huge strength. I'm sure you'll be labelled an outlaw. May God make it easy for all of us. Every word you speak relates. Thanks a lot.
This is what I have called being calm and focused and angry in myself. It's when the switch flips. All of my problem solving energy, and my finite focus is on them. My emotions calm. There is no going back.
There's a fine line between being meek and enabling abuse. Not everyone can or should speak truth to power as directly as described in this video (e.g. if it won't stop the abuse and will get you killed). But there's a LOT of healing that happens when abused people finally stand up for themselves, whether that's with overt confrontation or by internally deciding NO MORE and fading away. We don't have to wait for the afterlife to start making the world better now, and that's a wonderful thing! 💖💖
It's not that the narc is destroyed by the truth, but that WE are freed & reborn. 🌿🌿That's true whether we scream it in their face or quietly walk away. Huzzah! 🌈🌱😃☘💐
I almost fainted when I casually read your comment.. the same exact age when I said that to my abusive father. He never hit me again. Rest in peace dad❤
It is not my comfort zone but it is a pleasure to have developed supernova mode because the hell I experienced with my narcissistic family as an empath I would not wish on anyone. Never again. I'm almost not here, a high price. Now I feel that if the need arises I can take away anyone's desire to play with my life and without blinking. It is not narcissism in my personality, it is a new way that my 'computer' has to treat people with bad intentions. Bad people exists we need to learn to defend ourselves, and those people just understand: If you play here you pay for It.
A narcessistic famely is realey painful. I left my famely because i could not take anymore the abuse. My health destroied. I was the famely scapegoat and grandmother. The most painful expierience was to see my grandchilderen got abused by drunk narcessist. The pain that they grow up with realey toxic behaviour. I am alone now but I have my best frend left, my dog. I wisch you all power and greetings from Holland All over the world there are narcessist. 😢
@@paulineklostermann5877 My psychopath father is from Holland too!😒 I wish he never came to Spain!!. I also have two furry friends!, they are my true family. They helped me a lot during the worst times!.😊
I think I've just passed through this condition. As you said, the felt was exhausting. I create a zero emotion for my self when I talk with toxic people, also I decide to go no contact with them and also indifference. Rejecting is implied.
I, too, lost my voice while living under the roof of 3 narcissistic family members and a strict Catholic school. Some may call it "selective mutism" but when I tried to speak on demand, it came out as stuttering. I mostly didn't speak, went around quietly, trying to not make waves. I think I had lost myself, my soul, my identity amongst such a toxic home. When I left, I left for good, moving to another country. My voice is now strong, true, with an excellent vocabulary created to say exactly when I need to say, clearly and honestly. Thank you, Danish, for sharing your expertise and experience.
Right behind you, 11 yrs since I've seen my monster and counting, luckily I know her nursing home doesn't really want me due to germs, wouldn't mind doing selfies though and sending to other family members, 🤔🙄🤷naw!
I was 52 when I quit trying to be “a good daughter.” One too many Christmases ruined - & the LAST one! I let her know in every way I could how much she had damaged me in my life & how I tried but could never love her because of it & then I went stone cold no contact. She passed away 4 years ago this July. I shed not one tear. I feel a great relief knowing my tormentor is no longer on this Earth.
@@dwlsn93I also was a "good douther. But 15 years ago she begans to make mistakes. One mistake, the next mistake...and 8 years ago her biggest mistake ever.
I’ve just turned 60 have just had breast cancer and lost both of my breasts and have many post surgical complications and I’m finally about to go supernova on my Narc mother and brother ( both of them NPD diagnosed by separate Psychiatrists) They are killing me!! NO MORE!
I think this has happened to me😂 the first sentence of this video is funny but seriously thank you as a licensed person in this field for speaking on THE REAL aspects of this horrible shit
8:43 whoa... Wow, my heart was racing, listening to you. A) damn am i sorry you had to go through that... B) thank you for sharing; you reminded me of the time as a high schooler at around 9pm, when my mom was pissed off at me enough to get off the couch. I could tell she was about to hit me, and i grabbed her by her shoulders, and pushed her back into an armchair. It shocked both of us... and I'm pretty sure this event happened after her last time, where she smacked me and bloodied my nose. Damn these monsters....
Thank you for being so genuine and transparent on how you have handled these situations with narcissist parents from your own life. I learn so much from your real-life examples. About one year ago, after 43 yrs of marriage and two children, I have finally realized why my life was so filled with constant chaos amd confusion...he is a malignant narcissist. We've now been married for 44 years, and in the last year I have been learning, and becoming stronger and stronger. I don't get sucked-in to the manipulation that he tries anymore. I grey rock him constantly. I am 67 years old, and not sure how to start over, yet, but knowledge truly is power. Thank you for sharing your life with all of us, Danish!
I regret getting angry. I just took it for so long. I was so mad at being abused. I want to set it straight but that won’t help so i pray 🙏 and I just put all my faith in God.
I’m finding my voice after 40 years married to a narc. We live in the same house but live separate lives but sometimes my crazy narc will throw a stone over the wall to see if I’ll respond. And now this is what I do and boy does it work to give narcissistic injury when he says you really hate me don’t you, just can’t forgive and move on from the past. I say “I don’t hate you I just don’t care one way or the other you’re not worth my time or energy anymore and I quietly walk away. Indifference that is the ONLY thing that sets you free and that has ever worked Next when they’re trying to get a rise out of you walk away QUIETLY! Most powerful self lovingly thing you can do for yourself. … silence and nicely walking away. That’s how you extricate yourself. Self control is what God was trying to show you. No one can take your peace anymore. When you’re not interested in defending yourself or achieving any understanding that’s power and freedom. This is from pure experience, It works beautifully
So agree. Realised my husband was a narcissistic few years ago. Now, we still live in same flat ( necessity due to financial situation! ) but I am totally indifferent to him and we live separate lives except for occasional family events. My life is happy & fulfilled while husband is full of problems and angst, mostly self inflicted or well deserved!
Keep it up Danish! your videos are very inspirational and comforting. I'm currently dealing with a narcissist at work almost daily and she's constantly trying to get a negative reaction from me by using sarcasm to cover disrespect.
Hamlet, Act III, Scene I *To* *be,* *or* *not* *to* *be* - William Shakespeare To be, or not to be: that is the question: Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, Or to take arms against a sea of troubles, *And* *by* *opposing* *end* *them?* Genius, pure genius. Be sure to keep your integrity!
I went through this. I literally went off and told him the truth of who he was. I've had a few moments like this. I've always known I was an empath. I was in supernova mode for a while. I was fed up and done
The sad part is is that they can't understand that they have a part in anything. In their head and with everyone they speak about you, you are the problem. It took me a long time to realize that the majority people know they are not good people, but they just won't interfere because it's not worth it for them.
i definitely engaged in toxicity, i couldn't help myself. I never claimed to be perfect. I just asked to be left alone to deal with my pain on my own terms because doctors won't help, she caused so much chaos and my boundaries were ignored for so long that it caused me so much actual physical harm. now my "mother" has no access to me and I still can't escape her because I'm too disabled to do anything with my life.
i told her near the end of 2020 that I wasn't going to stay alive living with her, and so she bought a house basically next door so she could sit on my porch and make me feel just as trapped as I was in her basement. her money matters more than my life so that's that.
I am SO very sorry. This is very similar to where I’m at in my life. I left my nex and finally filed for divorce. My dad passed away a year ago. I feel my place is with my mom, trying my best to take care of her. Things are better than they used to be. But I still go through issues with her. I too am not able to work. It’s a depressing state. Best of luck to you. Prayers for both of us.
We had similar childhood-adulthood story and situations. Thanks for sharing your journey. I feel validated now. I'm not the only one who fought against this ❤
A perfectly timed video, thank you. I became a supernova last week, and I'm still feeling jittery. My situation is different but really useful to hear your story. To have a theoretical context to what happened helps a lot. Thank you for putting your videos out on this important subject. ❤
Yes Danish I am doing this NOW HEAD ON ! WITH ABSOLUTE FEARLESSNESS.. IT IS INCREDIBLY POWERFUL ! WONDERFUL !! ENOUGH IS REALLY ENOUGH WHEN YOU GET TO THIS STAGE ! Thank you so very much..
Thankyou so much for your detailed videos. Your video really helped me understand that it was not my fault after I walked out of my abusive house after 45 years.May God bless you. Now I know I am an empath & it is fine but I was always blamed for being over sensitive.
This is true! I stood my ground and told him who a nasty person he was and he was ashamed of himself! I wasn’t afraid to expose him and he knew! Now he can’t do nothing about it!!
I too am an empath and I am sorry you had this type of childhood. thank you so much for sharing that story RE the your last stand with your dad. Im so proud of you to stand up to him. Same happened to me at 15. He & my mom are both covert NARCS and both emotionally abusive & I finally stood up to my dad at age 15 for his unfair treatment and he disowned me. He didnt want anything to do with me anymore. Im the only child & I grew up emotionally alone for most of my life. You were such a good boy to defend your mom even though she too was toxic. Im so glad you dont talk to either parent anymore since they are both so toxic. Who needs people or parents like that in your life. Ive gotten rid of 99% of what I thought were friends & family in the past 4 yrs because I finally realized I was surrounded by toxic people who were taking advantage of my kindness.
That is awesome! New subscriber today and it’s a divine appointment because i just did this to my narcissist friend! I had enough and confronted him with the truth with righteous indignation! Im an empath but now realize Im more accurately a super nova empath and it rings loudly in my spirit. Let the healng continue. That is the motive and goal. If we know the truth it can set us free!
Good for you Danish, Sir, to hear this story about how you became the super nova. So encouraging for others. So proud of you. You are helping so many people. Thank you.
Thank you for opening up about your life and the abuse you have been through, I appreciate you and I have been through similar struggles with my parents. God Bless you! I get so much out of each and every video and it’s helped so much with my recovery! ❤
This is a very helpful video Danish, thank you! ❤❤❤ I had a similar run in with my own father who was being very cruel to my mother who was dying of cancer. He was shocked at me standing up for my mother and stopped his horrible behaviour straight away, and backed down. I just found the courage to insist he stop this cruelty! I was only 23 at the time and the youngest of 8 children. No one ever stood up to him, seems unbelievable. My mother was able to die in peace thank God 🙏🙏🙏
You are amazing !!!!! You are gonna get healed even more !!! They are done, finished !! Pluto Aquarius and Saturn Pisces says no more !!! Millennials are warriors of light !!!!
You are a legend your knowledge is medically important thank you. Ive had super nova episodes It’s like an angry force taken over to give the narcissist a injury. I felt evil in the moment but i am very empathetic for even spiders. so that’s low self esteem caused by a toxic relationship So i questioned my self between good and evil as my self esteem was shot at the time now I know I am a empath that may have a super nova episode if I don’t have boundaries for my sanity and self worth
I have watched your videos plenty of times & I am a bit smatter each time you speak. I appreciate your knowledge that you’re sharing with the world! I’m married to a narcissist for 7yrs & he didn’t pay our rent 3 mos so we got evicted. I’m staying with my friend. I’m learning my rights as a wife & hopefully I’ll get financial support with a divorce. I’m on disability and I’m seeking pro bono lawyer support which I think I’m eligible. Wish me luck! Thanks for your help always. Take care, be well, be safe, be you. You’re terrific!
I am very sorry about what you went through, & you are so strong, brave & Right for what you did!!! Love to you, & Thank you so much for your informative & amazing content ❤
Well done Mr. Bashir that you were able to tell him EXACTLY who he is and you remained a person of integrity and authenticity. I noticed you did not elaborate, and saved his dignity.
Oh my , Danish so good you explain the difference, between the evil meanings from a narc , to what a empath must do same kind of tricks to free oneself. I thought for years I becoming a narcssist , cause some friends I told my prison secrets, and told them ' I must use same manipulation tricks so it felt to get away from him. I felt so bad. Still I feel bad about it. But less cause you convince us abd confirm how it truly is. I don't think that abused empaths ever get rid of false guilt. Thank you so much Danish. Every word is true and hurts so much. I'm never so heard as you give me this extra knowledge. 🙏🏽😏 the calmness I had to learn I admit
Your story of how you confronted your dad was beautiful (well not his part of it obviously). Thank you for sharing your courage and experience. That was totally the conversation I wanted to have with my dad before he passed away. I also love that you threw in a cautionary statement about narcissists disguising themselves as empaths or super empaths. I actually met someone who called themselves an empath. I was like ‘empath besties!!’ And got all excited… Well this person turned out to be really toxic. I dunno if they were a toxic version borderline or a narcissist or a dark empath or what. They were very investigative, analytical of my behavior, so I thought ‘maybe they’re into psychology’. Well, I didn’t realize until it was too late. One night, I triggered them and they made several barbed comments, then attacked me when I apologized to them. I made a blanket statement (oops), asking why they were always like this when anything cropped up between us. And told them I didn’t feel safe with them… They used that one blanket statement to shut down the whole conversation. The next day they blatantly discarded me over it. I felt awful, as someone with trauma myself, for triggering them. But that in no way justifies their lack of empathy towards me. I told them I was blocking them and they’ve continued to blame me for everything they did that night and since… unfortunately the block button didn’t work thoroughly, and they are still able to message me in some ways… I really should address it with the platform but I was too tired. Most of all, I wanna figure out a way to never meet anyone like them ever again.
I see how special I am and am not ashamed any more of my ability and dignity. Danish gave me relief. The predator chose ME to finalize their lesson. Danish helped me realize I was still kind snd compsssionate
After I did this with my ex the wheels fell off totally and she showed her true colours for everyone to see, told lies about me to every one of my friends, they're evil people so dont feel bad becoming a supernova and eloquently telling them exactly what they are, later you'll see the real them and realise they have never been nice or ever cared about you. Be strong and never let them know your plans.
❤❤❤❤Great timing! The very first time in 14 years of marriage i become a supernova and my narcissist husband just realized there is no turning back. This is mind blowing! Yes, he become a mouse!
Thank you so much for sharing so earnestly, Danish. There's much to be healed about that sense of "acquired" / shrinking violet modesty. It's the kind of "shyness" that then stops us from doing all the things in life we'd like to, no? Perhaps leading to impostor syndrome. I had my supernova with a very close family member, decades ago. But I've since moved to another culture + country. And somehow, have fallen prey to various faces of npd, which led me to start looking into it around 6-8 years ago. It's given me awareness, but by not complete immunity. Hearing your story has been very helpful , because I now know that my final response to my relative, all those years ago, was indeed a supernova moment. I can stop to feel bad about it, and can indeed be reassured to replicate when necessary. Am immensely thankful to have stumbled upo this video. All the best
I am a Super Nova..I have ran away 9 narcissists!! My daughter father finally admitted to our daughter that he is a narc and I was right. He is now in therapy but becoming better not changing who he is but being aware of his behaviors !
“Some people wear their smile like a disguise. Those people that smile a lot, watch their eyes. I know, cuz I’m like that a lot. You think everything’s ok, and it is, till it’s not. It’s all gonna come out. Outta me on to you, outta me.”--ani difranco
I have a friend who is a narcissist and always thinks about what he can gain from everything he does. As a disciple of Jesus, I have forgiven him. I would like to remind us of the warning verses from 2 Timothy 3:2-5 about the narcissistic age we are living in. Verse - 2 Timothy 3:2-7 (NIV) But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God-having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people. They are the kind who worm their way into homes and gain control over gullible women, who are loaded down with sins and are swayed by all kinds of evil desires, always learning but never able to come to a knowledge of the truth.
This is exactly how it works. For me it occurred when the person I was talking with stopped messaging and randomly messaged me like nothing was wrong or happened. I denied them it and they cursed at me and constantly got angry for no reason even though I was always calm. I told them that their own thoughts and actions would be their undoing. This was after I fully analyzed everything that had occurred between us for months and drew lines of deception that I knew existed. The person goes around now thinking they are an empath and tells others it, not realizing I had them pegged for months as a narcissist; I could feel their anger growing towards me for no reason.
I can't tell you how blessed I am to find your channel I was in a relationship with a narcissist for 10 years and I was about to marry him but somehow my star stopped me and I had enough of bull shit I could ever take and I pushed him away I was never able to understand why he used to behave so cold towards me when I needed him the most I never knew about something exist called narcissist personality. But trust me when I discovered everything makes so much sense to me now and I stop blaming myself and learn to love myself everyday more than yesterday just because I am educated about how a narcissistic personality works
Went supernova today My covert narcissistic mother got up to shut the windows... What a confrontation it was! Danish I've learnt so much from you about covert narcissism Thank you ❤
Lovely idea, but not exactly correct in usage. "Going Supernova" is incredibly misunderstood (containing positive AND negative aspects...just like its definition). It is not necessarily a prolonged condition, or a new badge-of-honor, as much as it is a long-awaited, inevitable moment in time (instantaneous) where the light-bringer EXPLODES past the situation, exposing and vanquishing the darkness with Their God-given Light. Yes, in this sudden process, the abused/more empathic individual, does step into their own power - Shining brightly... Only to go cold and dark, for a time afterward -- dying, in effect -- to recoup from the overwhelming amount of light and energy that was expended. In that 'petit mort' (Fr. "Little death" - literally and figuratively ;) ), however, the conditions FINALLY exist for Peace... and Rebirth. ❤💫 I dunno, but it seems A Lot to ask of a t-shirt.* Lol. Edit: Removing the wrong/contractive form of (possesive) *its* ..stupid autocorrect. 😊
Heal After Surviving Narcissistic Parent
emotionalabuserecovery.com/hap
Thank you Danish for sharing your experience. It must have been hard to express and relive the dark moments! I have been watching you for some time and I really appreciate all your wisdom and decision to share and help everyone. I wish you a peaceful healing journey and great future ahead.
hi i would just like to say i am so proud of you for how far you've come, you're an inspiration and thank you for this video, i hope i can do what you did one day.
a narcissist's worst nightmare is an educated empath. the gig is up at that point. and they'll discard you quickly. but you'll know the truth. and they'll hate you for it.
in my lived experience, emotionally abusive narcissists will lose their minds if empaths do these 10 things:
1. let them know you're onto them
2. remain completely non-reactive
3. radical honesty, accept them for who they are.
4. treat them with indifference
5. rejection
6. exposure
7. unfavorable comparisons, compare the narcissist to normal, good people's behaviours
8. ignore them
9. get happy with your own activities
10. establish and maintain no-contact.
cheers from southern ontario, canada 🍁
Great job
Thank you that's good advice
@@carparthero true and it works! Thanks for sharing 🙏🏻💯
One of the things that cause them further insecurity is a person who is educated…
@@obieobrien5883 💯. narcs only want blind obedience and tolerance to them, nothing else.
Super nova is better than SUPER EGO. This is a perfect explanation.
You helped me get out of my narcissistic marriage after 8yrs of hell. Thank you. ❤
Best of luck❤
I hope so!
Congrats
44 years for me. 10 years ago I finally saw what he was called - A Narcissist. Everything started making sense. My supernova moment was this past April, I said, " Either start living up to your marriage vows, or follow through with your constant threats of divorce. I can't live like this anymore." He divorced me. Praise God! Finally free and I can sleep peacefully again for the first time in 10 years.
@@susanwallcraft1864power to you
Perfectly explained, Danish. Only those who have gone through such abuse truly understand. Going No Contact, calling their obnoxious behaviour out and defending your boundaries is not becoming like them. Intentions and context matter. Thanks for sharing your own experiences with us. Keep shining 🙏🏻💖🌟
I found out the hard way more than once how important it is to be careful when it comes to calling that kind of behavior out instead of running for the hills right away while going no contact.
@@francesbernard2445 it's important to be careful indeed. Depending on the narcissist and circumstances, not all of them can be called out. Safety is priority over anything else.
@@a.williams.scorpiopower perfectly said. people gotta read the room. i've done both where they made sense for each situation.
@@carparthero yep. Many times I had to bite my tongue where circumstances were not in my favour, for instance when the narcissist was my boss but because she was moved to another department she was not my boss anymore and once she started messing with me, that's it. Confronted calling her out immediately. She couldn't talk and never messed with me again. Narcissists are cowards hiding behind their fake image. Cheers 🌟
@@a.williams.scorpiopower i love hearing empowering stories of people standing up for themselves. great job there with the ex-boss. the workplace is def a political landmine and caution is necessary at times. good on you for calling out her bullshit.
keep fighting the good fight.
-all the best, steven
Yep, totally. we destroy their false fragile ego with constant truth.
Yep. Totally..Wait....WHAAAT?!
Yes, absolutely.
People with compassionate empathy can never turn dangerous but the try to destroy narcissistic false self and fragile ego with truth. They can’t turn into dark empaths which I keep hearing because they live a conscious living with moral values and a strong inner critic assessing right or wrong for themselves, for others and in a situation. I am not sure what this dark Empath is all about. Narcissistic people can turn empathy on or off based on situations and how it benefits them whereas empaths feel empathy even for narcissistic people despite their abuse. Empaths learn to set boundaries for self sanity and self preservation, which is required.
Always sharing truth facts 💥💥❣️
They can’t handle the truth
A supernova empath may be confused for a narcissist.
This because of the cold indifferent response to a narcissists crybaby victim act. Onlookers who only see the surface fall for the theatric but the empath sees right through the sheep-skin layer, looks right at the wolf in the eye saying "nice try".
The crybully.
I've seen it happen.
Yes, exactly
Like the wolf eats the sheep & wears it's skin layer to disguise as the sheep until it eats all sheep, yeah, I remember that story.
@@zakylajackson8799 'nice try'
@@nerifterafrnam4682 yeah, that's how villains get there way of being greedy.
Narcissists always ultimately fail.
I'm still waiting.
Yes but can take YEEEEAAARS, it's so painful
They won't ever see the failings. That's the irritating bit. They don't fail until their last breath though because there's always some idiot who believes their BS. They just need one.
❤When it comes to narcissists- they are one of the big reasons He is stepping in right now!🔥💪♥ He is coming to avenge!
👉Innocent go first- all the children of the world will disappear first then the adult believers.🥰 Jesus is coming back to pick up all those who accepted free gift of His death for their sins. Yes, after 2 000 years He is coming back with promised salvation!🙌♥🥳
As He speaks through the prophets He is sickened by the world: lies, abuse amd manipulations.
Before He comes we will see Alaska's back to back earthquakes 7.6 and 7.3, we will also see Germany and Russia exchanging missiles. Jesus spoke of it all through his prophets! 🙌❤😊
Jesus removes His believers and then Apocalypse starts, do not be left for that! 🥹❤You can still call out to Him when kids are gone! Make sure you make Jesus your Lord and Saviour🙌❤He loves you like crazy! He sees you, ♥
😍
Trust in what He did on the cross for you! He died for our sins and defeated the death by rising 3 days later!
🙌❤🥹
👉We are about to see Russia attacking Germany, Alaska experiencing two devastating earthquakes (magnitude 7.6 and 7.3) and the fall of Freemason Temple in Philadelphia.🙌
👉Only God knows the future. Jesus has now revealed all those details to his prophets right now!
👉CHILDREN will disappear around the world, then His true believers!
Jesus promised 2 000y ago that He will come back for everybody who accepted His payment ( His death) for all sins.
He will literally pull us out of this world so that we don't have to stay for the Judgment ( the Apocalypse).
You can still call out to Him to save you after kids are gone, He will rescue you too❤
Make sure to make Jesus your Lord and Saviour🙌❤He loves you like crazy! He sees you❤🥹
What saves us is trust in what He did on the cross: He died for our sins and then defeated the death by rising 3 days later! He made it very simple, He has done it all for us so don't add anything to it!
🙌❤🥹
“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”
― Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Narcs don't know their enemies true characteristics and they don't self reflect to know themselves. They are doomed from the beginning. It's just like chess. Sometimes the game is played out fully even though you both know the end.
Danish, you are an absolute Supernova of light!
Isn't funny how we are opposites attract narcs in that we love truth sayers even unafraid to be ones, narcs shrink and hide from the truth, talk about unable to handle themselves well!
So true dear.
I can relate. It’s like a switch flips. You literally can’t physically,, emotionally, spiritually mentally tolerate it anymore. Mine was different I completely shut down like a vampire had sucked me dry one last time. It wasn’t calculated it just happened. Very hard to describe but call it beyond numb. Later able to see in a text message exactly who they were.
Projection, projection, projection. To set up a storyline for their image. I let go of how it should be and saw what it truly was. My body wouldn’t allow it to continue.
After a point, the things you're willing to lose are no longer worth it. That's what the switch is, a revaluation, a willingness to lose what the abuser is holding as a form of ransom for your submission. Every time a victim has their big fuckit moment, they're throwing their cards on the table and the abuser has to put up or shut up. Many times, it's revealed they were a paper tiger, and the threats of retaliation or destruction were just headgames, other times, they "pull the pin" on their revenge grenade. Either way, their target is already gone, and all that remains is a new person who can't be harmed in the same way anymore, because they don't care about the repercussions. They're past it.
At first, going no contact 8 months ago was difficult. I felt doubt, guilt , fear anxiety and many more mixed emotions. There was much to learn about this abuse. I watched the abuser after no contact and they reacted just as a narcissist would. Observing the behavior after I went no contact helped a great deal. Much of what you mentioned in your videos has occurred for the past almost 60 years. Today I'm not only following through with my no contact, I have to after realizing all the damage this family member has done. It is just natural for me not to ever turn back. I just plain and simple naturally could not do it even if I wanted to make myself for peace at losing others manipulated by her lies .I'm getting the hoovering, campaign smear and so on. I've stayed silent to the smear. If I ever get a chance to defend myself, It will be when we are not alone. There will have to be people there that she has worked to ruin my reputation with. If I never get that chance that's okay too. I'm feeling pretty strong even though I have a ways to go in healing. I'm feeling like a super empath. I absolutely love falling in love with who I am and who I have always been. Kind, loving and compassionate. A gift to others and much more really. Thank you for sharing your experience with other victims. God bless.
Oh yeah, you get pushed too far and one day, BOOM! A person can only take so much, and Empaths take on so much more than most people do when it comes to abuse. This is why the explosion finally happens. And yes, it is an absolutely horrible experience. Not something in our nature to do. I was literally on my back for days after....could not move. Much LOVE❤❤❤
Oh for goodness sake.
It just happened to me with my narcissistic mother 2 days ago. It takes YEARS to push me to that point, but I screamed at the top of my lungs when she pretended to care and asked why I was crying. Of course, gaslighting, denial and fake empathy followed for the next several hours and I still feel like I was hit by a train
I went Supernova on my Narcissist Dad years ago. He called me at my lowest point and tried to use it to put me down and it turned me into something I've never been before. I unloaded on him with so much energy it was like he was paralyzed and actually didn't interrupt me. Well he tried once and I shut him down. Being a Marine I was free to use all the terrible language in my vocabulary. He is a self riotous minister that was in complete shock that I would ever talk to him this was. I has to stand my ground and let him know he was wrong and his lies would never describe me as this bad person he tried to make me be. This evil negativity must not be tolerated and he knew he finally pushed me over the edge. Sad thing, is that he is still a Narcissist, but he knows he doesn't hold power over me anymore. ❤
I relate. My ex had already left me but only a couple of weeks later, he was visiting with our son, and he started a fight with me. He tried to stand over me, when I stood up and threatened the police. It was like I physically pushed him: he fell on the couch and went all small, his whole demeanour changed. He again tried to manipulate me further but I stood square in front of him, and said “I see you. I know who you really are.” He freaked out, he started shaking and crying, talking about his childhood trauma. I just kept saying “I know what you’re doing.” “Your manipulation no longer works with me”. To everyone he is a very strong man, but I remember feeling so shocked at how much he crumbled that evening. Since then, I don’t feel so afraid of him. I’m finding my strength as the weeks go by.
Am going through this process myself, after escaping a 29-year marriage with a truly toxic narcissist who nearly destroyed me. Thank you for making these videos. They have been very helpful.
don’t feel sorry or blame yourself, because anyone could fall for the charm of a narcissist. but going forward, once you see it and understand what it is, you need to go no contact immediately. if you have to interact with a toxic person, then go grey rock.
all the best in your healing journey.
@@carparthero but a good thing after narcissistic about empath become spritual they trust God not others easily....is that true ?
@@carpartheroCharm - Not all that glitters is gold....❤
Thank you for the support. Very much appreciated.
@@User-t3g3x not a big religion guy. jesus helps people that help themselves lol. narcissism is a heart-attack serious matter. there's tons of resources on YT and FB, for serious people who are willing to do the work to learn and apply the knowledge.
You are so right we all can make mistakes but it’s something wrong with grown people who are performing criminal acts against another and teaching this to their own children allowing their children to do their bidding for them all the while laughing and calling it righteous is down right the worst kind of evil I have ever witnessed in my life.
"But sometimes cruelty is the only way to make a point so clearly that nobody can ever mistake its intent." - Peter Turbo
You have helped us tremendously to understand their shenanigans.
I love what you said about the narcissist feeling ENTITLED to our empathy. That is such a good point and we should remember that when someone is trying to gain our sympathy, especially when it's for something stupid that they created themselves when it could have easily prevented, if only they had common sense. That irritates me to no end. My coworker complained to me that she's sooo tired because she worked the overnight shift and went to the beach all day and had to work again. Raspy voice and all to emphasize just how tired she was. I responded with 'well, I would've skipped the beach then' and walked away. What I really wanted to say was 'so you expect me to feel sorry for you because you didn't go home and go to bed'? She definitely wanted me to say 'aww that's a shame' to give her a nice blast of fuel but I wouldn't do it. Too many incidents with this woman and now I ignore and avoid her at work, no thank you to that nonsense.... 🙄
Yep.
Validation is cheap. Don't smooth over _their_ bad decisions. Prick 'em.
I sent the Narc a letter calmly calling him out on everything and told him I don’t need or want him in my life and said I don’t want a reply , wished him well.
He raged at me in a text , I never responded and blocked him. Good riddance
This has been heavily on my mind. I want to do this with my father. We already have fairly low contact but starting communicating more. After being vulnerable with him I caught him trying to manipulate me. I also saw how he talked bad about his ex, in the same way he did my mom. And my siblings just enabled his behavior. It’s a no for me. I’m getting out immediately. The only issue is he knows where I live.
@@Doit_becomeit1228write the letter and burn it. The Narcissist will show everyone the letter and use it against you. If you must write the letter, don't share it. Destroy it.
@@herelieskittythomas3726 people who take the side of the narcissist were already looking for an excuse to go against you.
as long as the letter is polite, firm and factual, i would write it. narcs hate being called out. well, if you don't like it done to you, don't do it to others.
So smart
I made that letter for my narc boss, but sent that letter to HR instead, going into detail about his bullying.
Refusing expensive gifts destroys a narcissist.....
My narc buys me no gifts- not even for Christmas!
My sister buys things I never wanted and gives them to me, or takes me out to a spa day and says “ my treat” I didn’t fall for it this time because she said this before..you owe me a favor because I paid for your dining table set, or I took you to get a spa treatment with me and I was kind enough to do that for you. No… it’s using that as leverage down the road and to tell other people I’m ungrateful for her kind gestures. I kept saying no, I can pay for my own things… i can tell she was getting upset under her breath. Never take any offers from a narc.
I just CALLED OUT one in my life one week ago. She was pure evil and she think of ways to "rub salts on my wounds" intentionally. I told her directly on the face that "You did everything on purpose!" and just walked off.
Thinking back, if not for that day, I didn't know that I was so strong. I finally realized that she worth NOTHING from me.
Sadistic and Insidious are common traits.
I am aware later too how my narcisstic mother is. Sad but true.
Glad that I have own separate life.
This is me right now. Just pushed back with every bit of remaining energy left in me, after which all other energy is diverted to leaving. Leaves you feeling like you've wrestled a beast, continuously, for years on end.
You HAVE wrestled a beast..Straight up demon
I once said to my nex in an argument that he is just like his father and from that moment all hell broke loose in the house. So be carefull when you do this!🙏🏽
I said the same thing to my husband and all hell broke loose in my house too. I just went in the other room and recorded it as he raged on.
That’s what happens when you pull their masks off. The true monsters.
I made this mistake too. Now I just push to have them draw the conclusion themselves and that's far more satisfying even though you will still get blamed.
As much as we are healing listening to you, i feel you too need the healing as we do. I'm not aware about the exact dynamics, but if you've taken this step, leaving one's parents, it needs huge strength. I'm sure you'll be labelled an outlaw. May God make it easy for all of us. Every word you speak relates. Thanks a lot.
Well said.
This is what I have called being calm and focused and angry in myself. It's when the switch flips. All of my problem solving energy, and my finite focus is on them. My emotions calm. There is no going back.
And then they get petty and angry and very obviously a bully. Best to do this in front of a witness.
Uff...this is what happened to me. After 3 years of repressed anger, i exploded at him at once and kicked him out of the apartment.
The meek will inherit the earth.
The last will be first and the first last.
Amen!
There's a fine line between being meek and enabling abuse. Not everyone can or should speak truth to power as directly as described in this video (e.g. if it won't stop the abuse and will get you killed). But there's a LOT of healing that happens when abused people finally stand up for themselves, whether that's with overt confrontation or by internally deciding NO MORE and fading away.
We don't have to wait for the afterlife to start making the world better now, and that's a wonderful thing! 💖💖
Unfortunately that is unlikely. No one will 'inherit. the earth.
@@StillThink2MuchI believe Ill 'move along' when I see fit Pudmer. Ok? Good.
@@emeryrandall-h2xgotta get past your defeatist mentality.
It's not that the narc is destroyed by the truth, but that WE are freed & reborn. 🌿🌿That's true whether we scream it in their face or quietly walk away. Huzzah!
🌈🌱😃☘💐
Ok. Great. Yeah.
I was finding a way of saying this, well said 100% true
P.s . HUZZAH!
@@carolinav980 😄❤
I remember telling my step father that this was the last time he was going to hit me. I was 18.
I was 20
14
And?
I almost fainted when I casually read your comment.. the same exact age when I said that to my abusive father. He never hit me again. Rest in peace dad❤
It is not my comfort zone but it is a pleasure to have developed supernova mode because the hell I experienced with my narcissistic family as an empath I would not wish on anyone. Never again. I'm almost not here, a high price.
Now I feel that if the need arises I can take away anyone's desire to play with my life and without blinking. It is not narcissism in my personality, it is a new way that my 'computer' has to treat people with bad intentions. Bad people exists we need to learn to defend ourselves, and those people just understand: If you play here you pay for It.
A narcessistic famely is realey painful. I left my famely because i could not take anymore the abuse. My health destroied. I was the famely scapegoat and grandmother. The most painful expierience was to see my grandchilderen got abused by drunk narcessist. The pain that they grow up with realey toxic behaviour. I am alone now but I have my best frend left, my dog. I wisch you all power and greetings from Holland
All over the world there are narcessist. 😢
@@paulineklostermann5877
My psychopath father is from Holland too!😒 I wish he never came to Spain!!.
I also have two furry friends!, they are my true family. They helped me a lot during the worst times!.😊
I also did it.. I was straight, strong and to the point. and that was it. I am out of the relationship for last 8 months. I am so proud of myself ❤
your example of calm and dignity and focus is such an example for me to follow. to grab that state of mind thankyou.
Born for this ~ It's a tough job but someone has to do it. 😎🌎🌞🌊🔥🌬
I think I've just passed through this condition. As you said, the felt was exhausting. I create a zero emotion for my self when I talk with toxic people, also I decide to go no contact with them and also indifference. Rejecting is implied.
I, too, lost my voice while living under the roof of 3 narcissistic family members and a strict Catholic school. Some may call it "selective mutism" but when I tried to speak on demand, it came out as stuttering. I mostly didn't speak, went around quietly, trying to not make waves. I think I had lost myself, my soul, my identity amongst such a toxic home. When I left, I left for good, moving to another country. My voice is now strong, true, with an excellent vocabulary created to say exactly when I need to say, clearly and honestly. Thank you, Danish, for sharing your expertise and experience.
Gave mom chance after chance and at 59 I went super nova.
Right behind you, 11 yrs since I've seen my monster and counting, luckily I know her nursing home doesn't really want me due to germs, wouldn't mind doing selfies though and sending to other family members, 🤔🙄🤷naw!
I was 52 when I quit trying to be “a good daughter.” One too many Christmases ruined - & the LAST one! I let her know in every way I could how much she had damaged me in my life & how I tried but could never love her because of it & then I went stone cold no contact. She passed away 4 years ago this July. I shed not one tear. I feel a great relief knowing my tormentor is no longer on this Earth.
@@dwlsn93I also was a "good douther. But 15 years ago she begans to make mistakes. One mistake, the next mistake...and 8 years ago her biggest mistake ever.
Me too… big time
I’ve just turned 60 have just had breast cancer and lost both of my breasts and have many post surgical complications and I’m finally about to go supernova on my Narc mother and brother ( both of them NPD diagnosed by separate Psychiatrists)
They are killing me!!
NO MORE!
Be a hero without a cape. Everybody can do it.
I think this has happened to me😂 the first sentence of this video is funny but seriously thank you as a licensed person in this field for speaking on THE REAL aspects of this horrible shit
Oh wow this is even better explanation than I heard previously.
When I was 18 I went supernova twice. It's exhausting.
Did you feel also a small since of calm? I did.❤
8:43 whoa... Wow, my heart was racing, listening to you. A) damn am i sorry you had to go through that... B) thank you for sharing; you reminded me of the time as a high schooler at around 9pm, when my mom was pissed off at me enough to get off the couch. I could tell she was about to hit me, and i grabbed her by her shoulders, and pushed her back into an armchair. It shocked both of us... and I'm pretty sure this event happened after her last time, where she smacked me and bloodied my nose. Damn these monsters....
Thank you for being so genuine and transparent on how you have handled these situations with narcissist parents from your own life. I learn so much from your real-life examples.
About one year ago, after 43 yrs of marriage and two children, I have finally realized why my life was so filled with constant chaos amd confusion...he is a malignant narcissist. We've now been married for
44 years, and in the last year I have been learning, and becoming stronger and stronger. I don't get sucked-in to the manipulation that he tries anymore. I grey rock him constantly.
I am 67 years old, and not sure how to start over, yet, but knowledge truly is power.
Thank you for sharing your life with all of us, Danish!
I regret getting angry. I just took it for so long. I was so mad at being abused. I want to set it straight but that won’t help so i pray 🙏 and I just put all my faith in God.
I’m finding my voice after 40 years married to a narc. We live in the same house but live separate lives but sometimes my crazy narc will throw a stone over the wall to see if I’ll respond. And now this is what I do and boy does it work to give narcissistic injury when he says you really hate me don’t you, just can’t forgive and move on from the past. I say “I don’t hate you I just don’t care one way or the other you’re not worth my time or energy anymore and I quietly walk away. Indifference that is the ONLY thing that sets you free and that has ever worked Next when they’re trying to get a rise out of you walk away QUIETLY! Most powerful self lovingly thing you can do for yourself. … silence and nicely walking away. That’s how you extricate yourself. Self control is what God was trying to show you. No one can take your peace anymore. When you’re not interested in defending yourself or achieving any understanding that’s power and freedom. This is from pure experience, It works beautifully
So agree. Realised my husband was a narcissistic few years ago. Now, we still live in same flat ( necessity due to financial situation! ) but I am totally indifferent to him and we live separate lives except for occasional family events. My life is happy & fulfilled while husband is full of problems and angst, mostly self inflicted or well deserved!
Let the truth prevail and don't let yourself be put down by their constant lying and twisting of reality
Keep it up Danish! your videos are very inspirational and comforting. I'm currently dealing with a narcissist at work almost daily and she's constantly trying to get a negative reaction from me by using sarcasm to cover disrespect.
Hamlet, Act III, Scene I *To* *be,* *or* *not* *to* *be*
- William Shakespeare
To be, or not to be: that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
*And* *by* *opposing* *end* *them?*
Genius, pure genius. Be sure to keep your integrity!
Just found your channel. Been binging on it ever since. Love Love Love it. Thanks so much
I went through this. I literally went off and told him the truth of who he was. I've had a few moments like this. I've always known I was an empath. I was in supernova mode for a while. I was fed up and done
The sad part is is that they can't understand that they have a part in anything. In their head and with everyone they speak about you, you are the problem. It took me a long time to realize that the majority people know they are not good people, but they just won't interfere because it's not worth it for them.
i definitely engaged in toxicity, i couldn't help myself. I never claimed to be perfect. I just asked to be left alone to deal with my pain on my own terms because doctors won't help, she caused so much chaos and my boundaries were ignored for so long that it caused me so much actual physical harm. now my "mother" has no access to me and I still can't escape her because I'm too disabled to do anything with my life.
i told her near the end of 2020 that I wasn't going to stay alive living with her, and so she bought a house basically next door so she could sit on my porch and make me feel just as trapped as I was in her basement. her money matters more than my life so that's that.
I am SO very sorry. This is very similar to where I’m at in my life. I left my nex and finally filed for divorce. My dad passed away a year ago. I feel my place is with my mom, trying my best to take care of her. Things are better than they used to be. But I still go through issues with her. I too am not able to work. It’s a depressing state. Best of luck to you. Prayers for both of us.
We had similar childhood-adulthood story and situations. Thanks for sharing your journey. I feel validated now. I'm not the only one who fought against this ❤
A perfectly timed video, thank you. I became a supernova last week, and I'm still feeling jittery. My situation is different but really useful to hear your story. To have a theoretical context to what happened helps a lot. Thank you for putting your videos out on this important subject. ❤
Yes Danish I am doing this NOW HEAD ON !
WITH ABSOLUTE FEARLESSNESS.. IT IS INCREDIBLY POWERFUL ! WONDERFUL !!
ENOUGH IS REALLY ENOUGH WHEN YOU GET TO THIS STAGE ! Thank you so very much..
Thankyou so much for your detailed videos. Your video really helped me understand that it was not my fault after I walked out of my abusive house after 45 years.May God bless you. Now I know I am an empath & it is fine but I was always blamed for being over sensitive.
This is true! I stood my ground and told him who a nasty person he was and he was ashamed of himself! I wasn’t afraid to expose him and he knew! Now he can’t do nothing about it!!
I too am an empath and I am sorry you had this type of childhood. thank you so much for sharing that story RE the your last stand with your dad. Im so proud of you to stand up to him. Same happened to me at 15. He & my mom are both covert NARCS and both emotionally abusive & I finally stood up to my dad at age 15 for his unfair treatment and he disowned me. He didnt want anything to do with me anymore. Im the only child & I grew up emotionally alone for most of my life. You were such a good boy to defend your mom even though she too was toxic. Im so glad you dont talk to either parent anymore since they are both so toxic. Who needs people or parents like that in your life. Ive gotten rid of 99% of what I thought were friends & family in the past 4 yrs because I finally realized I was surrounded by toxic people who were taking advantage of my kindness.
Thank you for helping us. We are right behind you. Lead the way.
Has anyone experienced teeth grinding while sleeping
Yes, it's the tension from dealing with the insanity of the narcissist.
Yes i have that problem for many years.
Since I was a child xx
I dislocated my jaw from it. Get a gum shield.
@@apollyon1 gumshield can help to protect the teeth. That is what the Dutch dentist give also .
That is awesome! New subscriber today and it’s a divine appointment because i just did this to my narcissist friend! I had enough and confronted him with the truth with righteous indignation! Im an empath but now realize Im more accurately a super nova empath and it rings loudly in my spirit. Let the healng continue. That is the motive and goal. If we know the truth it can set us free!
Good for you Danish, Sir, to hear this story about how you became the super nova. So encouraging for others. So proud of you. You are helping so many people. Thank you.
Thank you for opening up about your life and the abuse you have been through, I appreciate you and I have been through similar struggles with my parents. God Bless you! I get so much out of each and every video and it’s helped so much with my recovery! ❤
I'm glad you said this. That is more or less what I have done. You had me worried with your previous pod casts.
This is a very helpful video Danish, thank you! ❤❤❤ I had a similar run in with my own father who was being very cruel to my mother who was dying of cancer. He was shocked at me standing up for my mother and stopped his horrible behaviour straight away, and backed down. I just found the courage to insist he stop this cruelty! I was only 23 at the time and the youngest of 8 children. No one ever stood up to him, seems unbelievable. My mother was able to die in peace thank God 🙏🙏🙏
Same, malignant father, covert mother...Similar experience going supernova as well...
I am glad that you stood your ground ❤
You are amazing !!!!! You are gonna get healed even more !!! They are done, finished !! Pluto Aquarius and Saturn Pisces says no more !!! Millennials are warriors of light !!!!
You are a legend your knowledge is medically important thank you.
Ive had super nova episodes
It’s like an angry force taken over to give the narcissist a injury.
I felt evil in the moment but i am very empathetic for even spiders. so that’s low self esteem caused by a toxic relationship
So i questioned my self between good and evil as my self esteem was shot at the time
now I know I am a empath that may have a super nova episode if I don’t have boundaries for my sanity and self worth
I have watched your videos plenty of times & I am a bit smatter each time you speak. I appreciate your knowledge that you’re sharing with the world! I’m married to a narcissist for 7yrs & he didn’t pay our rent 3 mos so we got evicted. I’m staying with my friend. I’m learning my rights as a wife & hopefully I’ll get financial support with a divorce. I’m on disability and I’m seeking pro bono lawyer support which I think I’m eligible. Wish me luck! Thanks for your help always. Take care, be well, be safe, be you. You’re terrific!
I am very sorry about what you went through, & you are so strong, brave & Right for what you did!!! Love to you, & Thank you so much for your informative & amazing content ❤
I think of all the videos out there about narcissists you are the one who is spot on about everything man. Many thanks for this, very helpfull.
Well done Mr. Bashir that you were able to tell him EXACTLY who he is and you remained a person of integrity and authenticity. I noticed you did not elaborate, and saved his dignity.
Love it. Keep up the great content.
Oh my , Danish so good you explain the difference, between the evil meanings from a narc , to what a empath must do same kind of tricks to free oneself. I thought for years I becoming a narcssist , cause some friends I told my prison secrets, and told them ' I must use same manipulation tricks so it felt to get away from him. I felt so bad. Still I feel bad about it. But less cause you convince us abd confirm how it truly is. I don't think that abused empaths ever get rid of false guilt. Thank you so much Danish. Every word is true and hurts so much. I'm never so heard as you give me this extra knowledge. 🙏🏽😏 the calmness I had to learn I admit
Great video. Danish you have taught us so much, so clear and concise. God bless❤️
Your story of how you confronted your dad was beautiful (well not his part of it obviously). Thank you for sharing your courage and experience. That was totally the conversation I wanted to have with my dad before he passed away.
I also love that you threw in a cautionary statement about narcissists disguising themselves as empaths or super empaths. I actually met someone who called themselves an empath. I was like ‘empath besties!!’ And got all excited…
Well this person turned out to be really toxic. I dunno if they were a toxic version borderline or a narcissist or a dark empath or what. They were very investigative, analytical of my behavior, so I thought ‘maybe they’re into psychology’.
Well, I didn’t realize until it was too late. One night, I triggered them and they made several barbed comments, then attacked me when I apologized to them. I made a blanket statement (oops), asking why they were always like this when anything cropped up between us. And told them I didn’t feel safe with them…
They used that one blanket statement to shut down the whole conversation. The next day they blatantly discarded me over it. I felt awful, as someone with trauma myself, for triggering them. But that in no way justifies their lack of empathy towards me.
I told them I was blocking them and they’ve continued to blame me for everything they did that night and since… unfortunately the block button didn’t work thoroughly, and they are still able to message me in some ways… I really should address it with the platform but I was too tired.
Most of all, I wanna figure out a way to never meet anyone like them ever again.
Thank you for sharing your story. I'm glad you were able to get away from him.
Thanks!
More power to you, Danish! 🔥
Keep shining...brighter and brighter... ✨🌞
Thanks Danish ❤, this will really help me,right now i m in that situation exactly where i have to play the last turn and his game will be over 😊
Thank you Danish. Your channel has helped me change my life.
Respect Danish... for telling these not formal stuff.
I see how special I am and am not ashamed any more of my ability and dignity. Danish gave me relief. The predator chose ME to finalize their lesson. Danish helped me realize I was still kind snd compsssionate
You are really doing good job educating us..nd spreading awareness. Hats off to u.
After I did this with my ex the wheels fell off totally and she showed her true colours for everyone to see, told lies about me to every one of my friends, they're evil people so dont feel bad becoming a supernova and eloquently telling them exactly what they are, later you'll see the real them and realise they have never been nice or ever cared about you. Be strong and never let them know your plans.
Backfire to narcissist, I love God thank God Amen
❤❤❤❤Great timing! The very first time in 14 years of marriage i become a supernova and my narcissist husband just realized there is no turning back. This is mind blowing! Yes, he become a mouse!
Thank you so much for sharing so earnestly, Danish. There's much to be healed about that sense of "acquired" / shrinking violet modesty. It's the kind of "shyness" that then stops us from doing all the things in life we'd like to, no? Perhaps leading to impostor syndrome.
I had my supernova with a very close family member, decades ago. But I've since moved to another culture + country. And somehow, have fallen prey to various faces of npd, which led me to start looking into it around 6-8 years ago. It's given me awareness, but by not complete immunity. Hearing your story has been very helpful , because I now know that my final response to my relative, all those years ago, was indeed a supernova moment. I can stop to feel bad about it, and can indeed be reassured to replicate when necessary.
Am immensely thankful to have stumbled upo this video. All the best
You are so spot on. I went through similar situation with my mother. We've been estranged for more than 10 years ... And it is peaceful
I am a Super Nova..I have ran away 9 narcissists!! My daughter father finally admitted to our daughter that he is a narc and I was right. He is now in therapy but becoming better not changing who he is but being aware of his behaviors !
“Some people wear their smile like a disguise. Those people that smile a lot, watch their eyes. I know, cuz I’m like that a lot. You think everything’s ok, and it is, till it’s not. It’s all gonna come out. Outta me on to you, outta me.”--ani difranco
I have a friend who is a narcissist and always thinks about what he can gain from everything he does. As a disciple of Jesus, I have forgiven him. I would like to remind us of the warning verses from 2 Timothy 3:2-5 about the narcissistic age we are living in.
Verse - 2 Timothy 3:2-7 (NIV)
But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God-having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.
They are the kind who worm their way into homes and gain control over gullible women, who are loaded down with sins and are swayed by all kinds of evil desires, always learning but never able to come to a knowledge of the truth.
Thanks Danish .very well explained.🎉
You r Guiding Everyone with a very Authentic way... ❤🙏
Danish, i feel your words, i realize it is hard to share your experience!! You inspire me!!!❤❤❤❤
Thank you Danish for telling your story wow the truth hurts deep.
This is exactly how it works. For me it occurred when the person I was talking with stopped messaging and randomly messaged me like nothing was wrong or happened.
I denied them it and they cursed at me and constantly got angry for no reason even though I was always calm.
I told them that their own thoughts and actions would be their undoing.
This was after I fully analyzed everything that had occurred between us for months and drew lines of deception that I knew existed.
The person goes around now thinking they are an empath and tells others it, not realizing I had them pegged for months as a narcissist; I could feel their anger growing towards me for no reason.
I can't tell you how blessed I am to find your channel I was in a relationship with a narcissist for 10 years and I was about to marry him but somehow my star stopped me and I had enough of bull shit I could ever take and I pushed him away I was never able to understand why he used to behave so cold towards me when I needed him the most I never knew about something exist called narcissist personality. But trust me when I discovered everything makes so much sense to me now and I stop blaming myself and learn to love myself everyday more than yesterday just because I am educated about how a narcissistic personality works
Went supernova today
My covert narcissistic mother got up to shut the windows...
What a confrontation it was!
Danish I've learnt so much from you about covert narcissism
Thank you ❤
Thankyou Danish for your valuable information you saved me from going into depression
Hi Danish, Perhaps you can have t-shirts make with the phase. " I Am A Super Nova!"
Lovely idea, but not exactly correct in usage. "Going Supernova" is incredibly misunderstood (containing positive AND negative aspects...just like its definition). It is not necessarily a prolonged condition, or a new badge-of-honor, as much as it is a long-awaited, inevitable moment in time (instantaneous) where the light-bringer EXPLODES past the situation, exposing and vanquishing the darkness with Their God-given Light. Yes, in this sudden process, the abused/more empathic individual, does step into their own power - Shining brightly... Only to go cold and dark, for a time afterward -- dying, in effect -- to recoup from the overwhelming amount of light and energy that was expended. In that 'petit mort' (Fr. "Little death" - literally and figuratively ;) ), however, the conditions FINALLY exist for Peace... and Rebirth. ❤💫
I dunno, but it seems A Lot to ask of a t-shirt.* Lol.
Edit: Removing the wrong/contractive form of (possesive) *its* ..stupid autocorrect. 😊
* Just having some fun with you. It really was a lovely idea. Hugs! 🤗😘
I love you man. Thank you for letting us know, understand and heal 🤍🌈