JLo's $20 MILLION Failure
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 16 มิ.ย. 2024
- Uncensored version: rumble.com/v524u0r-jlos-20-mi...
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#jenniferlopez #fanvidfeed - ภาพยนตร์และแอนิเมชัน
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Uncensored version: rumble.com/v524u0r-jlos-20-million-failure.html
For those who thought this was about Atlas lol: rumble.com/v4x9en0-noc-61-atlas-jlo-catchin-nuts-and-bolts-in-netflix-ai-sci-fi.html?mref=1sz27e&mc=3pdf7
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She was never a good dancer either. When she auditioned to be a dancer for In Living Color, she was terrible. She has gotten better over the years but she was off beat during her time on In Living Color.
(Girl...I'm still bugging over the BDSM fashion statement 😮)
“I don’t even get me”
We got a 54 year old teenager over here.
Are we looking into Taylor Swift’s future?
@@anastasia-fr1gnRight now, Swift has a boyfriend at 30.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
@@newhappythoughts1628 she is 34. Jlo also had boyfriends and even husbands. That’s nothing of what my comment was about 🙄
@@anastasia-fr1gn But Swift still has a chance while JLO’s 20 years older and on her 4th pending divorce.
"Being rich and going through heartbreak is just like working 12 hours a day in a factory, you guys, I totally relate to you."
JLo's head is up her backside for the warmth, the view, and the aroma, because her chocolate don't stink no more.
So, Alida and Taroo were a real myth in the Puerto Rican native lore, but surprise surprise, Jlo changed the story to fit her vision
What was the original and what did she change?
@@sklet5931second.
@@sklet5931that's what I was wondering. It's odd to refute something without an explanation.
@@n0odles86 look it up??
@@sklet5931
The legend she recites is more or less the folk tale but the context in which she's using it feels forced at best. The basic gist of the story is that the hummingbird hangs around flowers looking for his lost love.
It's sort of a childhood understanding as opposed to the actual reality of hummingbirds are just feeding on nectar from flowers. There's obviously also a sexual metaphor in there as well. Like the man being the hummingbird who has to poke his beak into a lot of flowers to find the right one.
The more you watch Jlo movies, the more it makes sense why she was quickly replaced by Kartman's hand.
Matt and Trey wore that green dress to the oscars better anyways too.
Only movie of hers that seems even vaguely passable is maid in Manhattan.
@@forsociopoliticalstuff2629Yeah that movie wasn't bad.
Taco-Taco
Burrito-Burrito
Taco-Taco
Fulfil all your wishes, with my taco flavored kisses!
@samoz6865 "taco flavoured kisses for my Ben" 😂
"Yeah! That's P. Diddy!" Ha! Never change J. Never change.
I always found her mediocre. My ex is Puerto Rican and he says they all hate JLo. This passion project of hers only has exposed her as kind of not smart and not charming.
I'm Puerto Rican and I used to be a fan. Even then, I never really considered her Puerto Rican. Our blood isn't really unique so 🤷♀️
Honestly, if you want a better movie, go watch Música, which happen to come out a month after "This Is Me...Now" did. A similar premise that's stylized around a fictional narrative inspired by Rudy Mancuso's life and relationships, even getting his actual girlfriend Camila Mendes to star in it.
Yet, that movie isn't as self-indulgent than what J. Lo gave us. It felt like the dude has some passion behind what he was making.
So my mom (53) was flipping through Netflix, figuring out what to watch. For kicks, I suggested Atlas or whatever it's called, just curious what she thought about J-Lo.
She gave me a look and said, "heeell, no, that woman can't act"😂😂
I’d like to say my mom wouldn’t like this but she loves Tyler Perry so…
I never understood the appeal J-Lo. Her music sucks and her acting.
I got some news, most of her "good music" is stolen from other artists through shady practices.
She has a butt
She uses her body to her advantage, that’s pretty much the only thing she has going for her.
She was hot during here prime years. She still looks nice but 2000s she was one of the top stars. That is usually good enough for nay success in most fields.
She used to insure her own ass. I think it's just for publicity stunt. That's how 90s preference lol
Isn't she a mother? Surely she should have matured past sappy, unrealistic ideas of love, and poured her time and energy into making her children feel loved?
Dear god. It really is grim when you point out she is in her 50s, doing this shit.
You think she's the one looking after her kids? 😅
Some chicks never grow up, no matter what. This is some middle school shit.
A 50-year-old who wants to pretend like she’s still in her teens.
@@oldoutlet6946 Her kids are super messed up, they look miserable and her girl is "non-binary"
Sadly, major actresses (or actors for that matter) have never exactly been known for being good mothers/parents. It’s a tale as old as the old silver screen era. Judy garland was known to be an amazing actress but too wrapped up in her own issues to not be neglectful to her children, mommy dearest was written about Joan Crawford for a reason, Angelina Jolie tended to collect kids as if they were a beanie baby collection, list goes on.
What a minute, this isn't that AI Altas movie where JLo befriends a mech suit?
Nah. But I DID do a watch-a-long lol rumble.com/v4x9en0-noc-61-atlas-jlo-catchin-nuts-and-bolts-in-netflix-ai-sci-fi.html?mref=1sz27e&mc=3pdf7
I don't get why so many people hate Atlas. The only things I can figure is they either got the wrong impression from the trailers, or they hate Jlo so they hate everything she does automatically.
Seriously, I've seen people say Atlas is the worst movie ever and I can't help but feel they haven't watched enough movies if they are going around spouting that.
@@silentgamer4368 It's not the worst movie ever yeah but it's still bad.
@@silentgamer4368I watched the reaction video. There was 39 minute of cliche action movie tropes.
Funny. I was expecting Atlas as well and realized I already watched JL rip that movie a while back.
Was it intentional that Jennifer was literally living in a glass house or was that her once again not having any form of self awareness? There's too many layers to that irony for it to not be the latter.
What, and i can't stress this enough, THE FUCK IS THIS??? IS THIS REAL?? How is this not satire? There is no way someone could be so clueless about how irrelevant they are. Who is telling Jennifer Lopez that she's a thing people care about?
Erm, herself? Gawd, you're so mean to her ego.
/s
They all (even Ben) tried to warn her.
"A big shadow'S coming over me..."
"IT'S P'S DIDDY!"
25 people did the AI art and none of them bothered to polish it up? They didn't even bother to hire people skilled with that tech.
It took 25 people to write a prompt??
How do we know those names aren’t AI generated too? Lol.
"Why didn't she call it the Corazon floor?"
Because Nuyoricans dont actually know Spanish. Its just an accent without a language. It's bizarre.
Meanwhile the descendant of slavers Sunny Hostin thinks she deserves reparations
It reminds me of "Finding Your Roots", people playing up Spanish accents talking about their hertitage when you know sure as sh*t those people don't talk like that normally.
Amazing. TH-cam deleted all the replies
@@cursedcancersurvivoruno diez gracias por favor. Never speak on my clique again esse. C’mon hermanos, let’s bounce. We don’t need to take this crap from a muchacho like you 😤
Alida and Taroo: We wanna be free to love each other!
God: Best I can do is turn you into a plant/bird.
😂 "Lemme turn you into a flower, and uuuh here's something cute, he can be a hummingbird but he'll be sipping every other flower around you until he finds the one he wants"
"C-can he not suck the juices of other flowers?
"Don't worry only 50 percent if flowers are women in this garden"
*The Gods
But yes.
*Greek Mythology has entered the chat*
“She treats my like an employee.” “Can’t you just be happy?!” Literally no. Wtf lol
Isn’t that unironically something narcissists say in abusive relationships???
@@nemuri6295 Pretty much. Could be brought on by NPD or could be that she’s addicted to chasing some fantasy happily ever after so she ends up treating people as a means to that
That felt unsettling as someone who's mentally ill and has been told that to silence me.
Wasn’t one of her boy toys actually her employee? Talk about a lack of self awareness. Lol.
Im glad to see neil degrasse tyson has fallen to the point of being in this.
Fallen just like the stars that made up his endless nuisance of a galaxy
Ever since the trans thing. He has been cringe
@@bibaolaitan5189 i...DO NOT wanna know his scientifically retarded take on those gender-denialist. because despite being unbeknownst to me your reference, i
K N O W it was cringe and gai and gross as usual
(i stopepd following him in 2015 when he became pop culture pedantic as fuck, i guess u imply he just became wors with time)
Jlo: "When your heart goes to sleep"
Me: "You mean when someone dies....right"
Bravo, good sir. It may not have been hilarious to you, but it was for me and I needed that today. Thank you.
At 2:36 I the *"Look at the top of his head!"* guy...
Excellent highlight of ubercringe, as always!
Same laugh, yeah! 🤣
So, I won't lie I put this on in the background thinking it was the Atlas film, boy was I surprised to suddenly see dancing.
Oh my god she actually made this mess? This is embarrassing! So narcissistic! She's 54! SHE'S 54!!! This woman has gone through menopause like 8 years ago! I'm not saying she can't still find love, but damn she's 10 years older than my grandma when I was born like girl please you aint looking like no Disney Princess dreaming about her past life humming bird forbidden boyfriend flying into her life damn.
How young were your parents, if your _grandma_ was only 44? Did police need to get involved? Lol
@@mrshmuga9 My grandma had my mother when she was 19 and married, and my mother had me when she was 25 and married so yeah no need to get police involved O_o
@@OpinionatedChicken59don’t worry, you can send the police MY way! My mother is the oldest of 13 children, and the age difference between her and her mother…
Is 15 years…
…you ever have to hear about crossing state lines to get a marriage approved?
Yay me! I have to live with this now.
@@OpinionatedChicken59 "o need to get police involved O_o"
It got pretty close though, lol
@@nhagan001 While notjailbait, my mom and her eldest sibling have an age gap about the same. Something like my grandma was having her while her eldest child was getting married. So I have "cousins" that are in their 50's while I'm about half their age.
This film is really about self love, because nobody loves Jlo more than Jlo.
Seeing Hollywood crumble is like watching the Other Mother's world in Coraline fall apart..showing their true colors....crap
@arantarisu_yamu2414 Yes, I like that, it's fitting 💯
Is there anything better than the sound of JLongbone laughing uncontrollably at stupid things? Comedy. Effing. GOLD.
JLo has been insane this entire time and I didn't know it.
I figured she was a narcissist like most celebrities, but _damn_ .
This title is hilarious because it's very similar to Neil Breen's film called "I Am Here... Now" where he plays alien Jesus and somehow it isn't nearly as narcissistic and vain as this movie lmao
Breen would make better use of AI art too.
I was thinking the same thing!
Same here! LMAO
Neil Breen has an unusual humility.
At first, I thought they were robots malfunctioning when the workers started “dancing” in the factory.
We were all wondering for a long time where God went.
Turns out he was trolling the ever living shit out of puerto ricans.
As a Puerto Rican, can confirm
Puerto Rican here. This is hilarious
The original title for this must have been 'Undateable'.😝
On the plus side, this makes 'Atlas' look like a movie that was made.😂
Jo Jo Siwa choreographed the factory dance. 😆
Mythology is full of weird shit like that, innit?
Like: “hey, I need help from the gods to prevent my oncoming misery”
**gets turned into a rock or something**
Someone literally turned into a tree 😂 Daphne got turned into a Laurel tree.
God’s up there like “Get pranked idiot”
I guess because a lot of myths were created to explain things that were previously unexplainable. But looking back, we wonder why a god would do some of the things they did in myths.
Careful what you wish for 😌💅
I'd want to know what Jennifer Lopez's real-life oldest friends think about the segment where she shows up in her old neighborhood, like coming down from heaven after finding fame to mingle with the peasants, where they're all still drinking on the same dirty street corner. I can't imagine that strengthened any bonds she has.
I'd really like to know. I don't think I've ever seen Jlo have a friend 😂
For the whole druation of this video, I was sitting here with a puzzled expression wondering what the hell this film is even about. Luckily you're commentary of this made it worth watching. Still, I was watching this video with this expression .
I’m right there with you lol
They couldn't even get the color of the hummingbird right. There is only one endemic hummingbird type in PR and it's entirely green. Multiple shades of green but normally only ever green.
I just loved all the native Brox people who made tiktoks responding to JLo calling her out. It was glorious.
Jlo stars in ChatGPT: The MusicalLove Story lol wth.
That's not even wrong lmao
When you paused the credits on the list of all the Digital “Artists”, the subtitles for the lyrics being sung up top read “All the fake shit you couldn’t sell me”. 😂
The most narcissistic part about this is what she doesn't mention. Her goddamn children!!!
But she did remember to call herself beautiful
wow she has children? I dont know much about her but watching this the only mention of children hi in the song where they go to Vegas, they say something like... Brining them in the car or something ? I didnt think it referred to her children since she looks childless.
"1.3 on IMDB..." J, you are a witty, legitimately funny person. I scared my cat laughing out loud.
Why oh why would that Puerto Rican myth/legend make a young Jenny enamored with the idea of “love”? Isn’t that tale more of a tragedy than a happily ever after?
Neil Degrasse Tyson really out here thinking he can cosplay Carl Sagan.
he thinks he still important... saaaaad sad twitter rot brain melted away his self awareness
I watched your responses to Riley Dennis years ago and came back to subscribe when you popped into my head a while ago. I’ve since binge watched your content. I love your no bullshit attitude and sense of humour. :-)
I've been inadvertently sneering at my screen for the last 19 minutes.
I love that Lauren paused on the credit screen as the lyric "All that fake shit you can't sell me" hangs above it all.
This is so cringe but its also funny 🤣
I saw one review, but you are going in depth with this BS lol. Love it. The dialogue is trash. Only one person I know of refused to do this movie. I also didn't know Keke Palmer was in this, wtf. The amount of talent in this is a crime 😂😂😂😂
How Ben Affleck bagged Jennifer Garner and Ana De Armas and left both for JLo is just beyond me. I get that love will make a guy do some stupid stuff, but dude… Duuuude…
And yes, the pictures are 100% done with AI.
The man does have an alcohol problem. He is addicted to booze and this crazy woman
This would've been impossible to watch without the commentary. God what a cringe fest.
Atlas Shepherd is a Mary Sue!
This feels like an "Art Movie". No plot, just an aesthetic and vibes.
Also, why is Trevor Noah and Keke Palmer in this movie? 😂
Maybe they respect her work ethic & appreciate her talent & love her music!
But probably money. It's almost always probably money.
@@ashleybrooke2087 Lmao obviously they were in it due to her work ethic 😂
lost a bet
@@xejelah 😂
Actual art movies are better than whatever Jenny was trying to make, well it depends on the kind of art movie.
I may only like about 3 or 4 of her movies, but seriously she thinks she's so much better than anyone else. There's other singers who can act better than her.
My dad services one of homes generators. The maid said that whenever Jen arrives everywhere, she REQUIRES clean white sheets, and bedspread scented with lavender with a lavender sprig on her pillow and chocolate. She sounds like me when I was 14, but with money. Except where I had to develop a personality, she did not.
Aw I was hoping this was atlas!
😉 rumble.com/v4x9en0-noc-61-atlas-jlo-catchin-nuts-and-bolts-in-netflix-ai-sci-fi.html?mref=1sz27e&mc=3pdf7
Thanks girl
Jay streaming from the Red Room 😂😂😂
My mom thinks that JLo is a great actress. I had to wonder...look what can I do? My mom is 70. She loved that new movie 'Atlas'. I-I-I just can't.
That's just how old women are. They all like JLo for some reason.
Cherish her while she's still here. Trust me on this
Let her enjoy what she enjoys. Be happy that she's happy. Lord knows my parents had no joy before they died.
@@coltonwilkie241"shes still got it"
@@robertwoods3871 Of course! How could I not! LOL!!😄😄
The 6 fingers got me lol
Black woman youtuber hates taco flavored kisses
To be fair...I'd rather just have the taco.
“Her family’s an Agent, they live in The Matrix, a Smith has taken over me!” XD
I’ll bet that JLo used her Atlas neuralink to create those trashy AI photos at the beginning of the wack movie. That’s what you get for trusting a robot, boo.
Also we all know that our girl Jlongbonicus is the superior JLO.
Damn that sonic edit killed me 😂
Her recalling i use that term loosely for obvious reasons feels like an oddly personal jab...
I had a dream about Ms palmer and let's just say that Keke was not bodies
While you've been noticing the character drawings, I've been focusing on all the modern buildings/skylines oddly slapped into the background of almost every drawing in this ancient myth storybook.
Did they deliberately add New York architecture into the AI program as a stylistic choice? Or did the AI just go "wft, I don't have any reference on ancient PR architecture. Modern buildings it is"?
It's the "Nuyorican" experience.
At first I thought Ben directed this, then turns out its someone else entirely directed this garbage with JLo. This movie was so obscure I had no idea it even existed, that's how little media coverage there is about this film. There were ZERO trailers of this film playing at all, anywhere. And Jlo thinks that her name alone will garner people to theatres, not realizing no one gives a fuck about her anymore. I don't even think a good number of her fans knew she even made this film.
I've only seen TH-cam talk about it in a negative way😂
It's no wonder why that is why part of this movie failed. Barely any marketing besides people waking up and realizing Jennifer is a terrible talentless person
You’re soooo funny!! I loved your review of the trailer. So funny. 😆
And this is why I will never work with anybody who relies on A.I for the job.
jlongbone is reviewing this, my week is complete :P
How much Taino ancestry does JLo actually have? I would venture more than "I'm a Cherokee!" Elizabeth Warren, but the fixation a lot of Hispanics have with presenting as nonwhite raises many an eyebrow. Especially when some of those Hispanics are clearly white. (Not JLo necessarily but a good number in Hollywood and real life)
I never understood it either, and I actually do have Taino ancestry from my grandfather and great grandmother, though I know genetically I'm more Black African and Spaniard than native Taino.
My guess is that because whiteness in the modern world (in the U.S. at least) has become synonymous with the mundane, bland and unremarkable or just downright evil, so people who are biracial or come from an ethnically ambiguous background would cling to whatever part of their cultural background that isn't European to make themselves seem more "diverse", or "exotic" and thereby more interesting.
It's kind of like those straight kids in middle and high school who tell people they're bisexual to come off as less ordinary than straight people are perceived to be. That's my hypothesis anyway.
@@autisticscreechling4950 I have know objectively white Colombians and white Puerto Ricans (as in, they have a full European appearance; one Colombian couple I was neighbors with could've passed for Italian grandparents). They range from mild confusion to annoyance when you point out they are white in a matter-of-fact way. "Oh we don't separate like that, etc etc." Uh-huh, I'm sure. One such friend (Colombian) once remarked with laughter on how she knew some white Cubans in Florida who claimed to be "minorities", while she herself and her brother are just as white.
And even if they do have some nonwhite ancestry, so what? It's like the "1/30 Cherokee, I ain't white!" claims. Knock it off, it's tiresome.
I think it's a holdover from 20th century education in Latin America trying to promote nationalism across ethnic groups via the "mestizaje" narrative. Not strictly a lie, but severely overstated, and made worse if they move to the US and absorb the Hollywood/pop culture race narratives.
So ethnicity means jack and your skin tone alone determines if you're allowed to be part of a culture now?
@@100organicfreshmemes5 According to African American women and most white liberals, yes.
Bruh she combined Puerto Rican myth and the backstory of the Lost City in Virtual Villagers 3
Her career is jLOW!
I saw the title and I assumed you were gonna talk about Atlas (Notshrugged) - imagine my surprise to learn that Jennifer Lopez was in another giant flop!!!
Jesus I didn't know how far jlo has fallen
No joke, i thought the guy playing rex stone was gary busey
Rex reminded me of comedian Dennis leary.
I would just like to point out that a movie based on a musician in a fictional universe with the false backstory can still be entertaining, J Lo made spice world look like an Oscar worthy movie.
Lol never new about this 😂😂
The only Jlo I care about is Jlo-ngbone.
I never realized how of a bad actress was JLo, but because (as an italian) I've always heard her actings dubbed.
Another thing, it's interesting that there are a lot of novels and other medias with the self instert protagonists and yet don't have too much of a big ego in those
J-Lo's brand has always been self-serious cringe.
South Park and Matt Damon were aware of this woman a long time ago.
it kills me every time she starts whispering to sound more authentic or whatever 😂😂😭😭
"society's twisted pleasure in seeing strong women fail"
Okay, which annoying woke journalist wrote that?
I also wonder what do they mean with strong woman. All the "strong woman" that I found in the recent movies are obnoxious, sometimes selfish, cunts who help no one else but themself and always need everyone else to help them. They don't act heroic and in some occasions they hurt people over the pettiest reasons (using violence first)
5:18 he looks like Donald Trump Tarzan
😂
Trurzan!
What is this shit? 😂😂😂
She should've just choosed the Bear🐻
Chosen.
I don't feel awesome today, but you are making me feel better with your humor lol 😂😂
Ben’s character, look up Jack Nicholson character in Mars attack the character Art Land, and tell me he don’t look and sound like him 💀💀💀
“We have Lemonade at Home.”
💀
Now THAT'S a roast, damn
In fairness, she's been in a few decent movies but "starring Jennifer Lopez" has never exactly been a compelling attraction for me. Not the most ringing endorsement.
And, let's be real like the woman herself would insist, when she is in a decent movie, it's not because she's in it.
Why does J-Lo keep popping up in my radar even though I've avoided her all my life?!
You are actually my new favorite person. Your BS radar is on point and you tell it like it is in a way that has me howling with laughter
From my limited knowledge of J-low, "Always the bride, never the bridesmaid" seems to apply.
2:02 No yeah this is AI, it's not even a debate. She has a necklace that's just part of her neck.
holy crap... how have i not ran across your content before? jfc, you're commentary is hilarious. bravo!
i don't even know she made a passion project. When you said he got back with BAflleck my mind immediately think "They made Gigli 2?"
Well, this is not Gigli 2, but this still look as painful.
"Rich people think they wear any god damn thing" 😂
I simp for jlongbone. Love your videos. 😊👍
22:41 Have you ever been to an addict meeting… and everyone starts having seizures? lol
my god you are SO funny- anytime you started making up lyrics you had me rolling
Just the beginning alone, I can understand why Jlo has so many failed relationships. This movie is meant for single lonely women hoping for that movie fantasy love life and never understood that the problem with all of their failed relationships are them