A scientific study into why ghosting happens in dating and what to do 👻

What’s the motivation behind ghosting and what are the consequences? How do people cope and is there a better way of cutting ties? In modern dating the term 'ghosting' was coined to describe when a person suddenly withdraws, seemingly without reason.
Researchers have sort to better understand why ghosting happens in dating, and this video discusses the results from a recent study, 'Gone with the wind: Exploring mobile daters’ ghosting experiences'.
The research team (Elisabeth Timmermans, Anne-Mette Hermans & Suzanna J. Opree) had three research questions: (1) Which motivations drive mobile daters to ghost?; (2) What are the consequences of being ghosted and how do mobile daters cope with being ghosted?; and (3) What predicts rating ghosting as a painful experience? In this video we break down what the scientists found to make their research more accessible.
Disclaimer: TH-cam is not therapy. My videos are for informational or reflective purposes only and should not be considered a substitute for professional advice or treatment.
Have a question or want to share a reflection? I'm always open to learning, so please do leave your feedback down below.
✍️ Kathleen
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00:00:00 - 00:00:34 - Intro
00:00:35 - 00:01:13 - Why Ghosting Exists
00:01:14 - 00:01:50 - Research Into Ghosting
00:01:51 - 00:03:33 - Overview Of The Results
00:03:34 - 00:04:25 - Consequences Of Ghosting
00:04:26 - 00:05:05 - Coping Strategies
00:05:06 - 00:06:49 - Conclusion
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Gone with the wind: Exploring mobile daters’ ghosting experiences
journals.sagepub.com/doi/full...
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🙋🏻‍♀️ WHO AM I?
I'm Kathleen (or Kate), a video maker, youtuber and provisional psychologist working in Sydney. I make videos about the journey towards becoming a registered psychologist in Australia, strategies to enhance your mental health and stories that have made up my own life, which you'll either find helpful or entertaining 😉
Some things I'm passionate about are community and connection. In Sydney I host a weekly walking group that brings together strangers, who hopefully leave as friends. Please join us on our next walk if you're visiting Sydney or if you're new to the area ✌️
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[@rungeon83]

This is a fantastic video, I've never ghosted someone who I've talked to a lot, I will always let them know if I'm going to go away. I don't feel I've been ghosted either. But I did talk to oddly enough my ex now on a dating app and didn't message her back for a week and she said "oh I guess it's just the times now people ghost, but wanted to make sure you're okay" as a result I felt guilty and felt I should reply, I wish i didn't but yeah! Always best to just say "hey it was lovely talking, but compaitbility for me isn't here" and if they ask for more reason than that you're well within your right to say "No" or not reply as you've let someone know that you're not feeling it. Better than them wondering.

[@kathleenanne]

Thanks for the feed back and thoughtful comment - agreed, better to be upfront and say if you're not feeling a connection!

[@user-yf1mv5ji3e]

If we weren't official there's no such thing as ghosting.

[@rungeon83]

lol so you're dating for 3 months every weekend (no sex/kissing, just hugs) and bang they ghost you? (And yes most my relationships take 3 months to develop as I can't just commit to someone so soon)

[@user-yf1mv5ji3e]

@rungeon83 I dated a girl 3 months and was all the way up to, but not having sex. I just quit calling/texting. If she texted or called me to ask why I would have answered but she didn't, so it's good.

[@rungeon83]

@@user-yf1mv5ji3e That doesn't seem like ghosting to me, it seems like neither of you was feeling it. The issue is when one person speically after 3 months (if you're meeting up often) suddenly blocks, no warning, no goodbye, just acts like a coward and runs away. Losing contact with someone happens a lot naturally but if you've not blocked her everywhere you didn't ghost.