Im trying to learn business as a 39 year old guy. All my 20s I got taken advantage of in everything, buying cars , paying too much for apartments whatever. Im glad TH-cam exists for guys like me who were never taught shit growing up. Appreciate the upload 🙏
Find someone successful in your business or the biz you want to get into and ask them for advice or help... you’d be amazed how many people want to help you...
@@Mr.Monta77 Why? Just Why?How is that relevant to this topic? I’m not saying it isn’t an accurate statement but it’s not relevant here. This is about negotiating and not accountability.
One of my favorite things to do when dealing with ANYTHING on the phone (customer service reps, whatever) is learn their name, ask how their day is (and sound sincere) and then, depending on how they react to the interaction, either fire off exactly what I want or explain the situation and ask "what can we do to get over this?" I've actually hoped for them to say no when I ask because chances are, if I think they can help, they're now on my side and want to help. I've essentially formed a team with them and coached them onto my side. I've done the "sounds like there's nothing you can do for me" and surprisingly, as soon as that comes up, they're jumping to help (I discovered this inadvertantly myself). I've also learned to never loose my cool unless I'm looking to terminate the conversation.
Recently found Lewis. I really like how he repeats questions in example form and always asks for more examples and explanation. Something most interviewers don’t do. Much easier to understand. Thanks. Subbed.
I cannot tell if what i admire about Chris is the calm collected way in which he speaks, timing of, pausing and voice with wording i use that most people don't.
I want this guy to read me bedtime stories. he's so calm. its probably for the best he's a good guy though. I wouldn't want to argue with him. lol. seriously though he should narrate his book.
his voice is soft and mellow, deep and sure however it is word-windy, and carries the whispering of fakery all through it... all the goodness of a voice mined for manipulation.
I could fall asleep listening to Chris speak. His knowledge is a melody of words that feed my emotional intelligence. The empathy that leads the human to touch out compassionately for truce & peace is a lullaby for life long lessons in mindfulness. Thank you Lewis and Chris for this fantastic interview ⭐
amazing advice ! every kid in every school should learn this from Kindergarten onward and have the course repeated every year as a part of the curriculum ! Learning to think things through in advance is a key life skill
My dad who owns a company taught me when giving quotations to talk about the customer enthusiasticly finding common interests more than the job, and then once the price has been given advise them to get other quotations, shake there hand wish them a good day and then notify them you must leave as you have more jobs to quote Also if other company's are mentioned to say we do not put down other company's we only concentrate on ensuring our customers are happy which means we don't need to slate competitors as we get Reccomendations
AGREED! When I first started my small business I used to get friends who wanted to just hang out at my store or to call me on the phone and wanted to BS all day. I used to tell them "Hey, I'd LOVE to sit here and talk, but I have a BUNCH of quotes to do, paperwork, orders to place with my suppliers...". They'd give me a look of surprise and say "Are you really THAT busy?". I'd say "YES" to give *everyone* the perception that we were growing rapidly, selling lots of stuff, people liked us... I honestly wasn't that busy at all, but "success breeds success" (and even the PERCEPTION of success!) and soon enough we had enough business on a shoestring budget that even my CPA asked "How are you doing this? I have a lot of clients and NO ONE is in the black and profitable with no debt EVERY SINGLE MONTH like you are!".
Excellent! I’ve had the privilege to take some classes with Voss and Steve Shull. Implemented some subtle changes on emails I send and it produced great results. I highly recommend Chris Voss’ book...it helps in all areas of your life....not just business.
I adopted two boys,middle schoolers, orphaned by addiction three years ago.. Been following Chris Voss about a year now...this stuff is incredibly effective.
Wow...truly committed people that have such meaning and a dedication to love and truly know what life’s about. Adoption is one of the godly definitions of humanity.
@@pandabear631 1) Wow I am blushing brick red hahaha 2) Please know...*they* "saved" me. They remind me to make time for play, to think before I speak...I'm richer for this experience. Mr. Voss' tactical empathy has been my most effective strategy. My heart trills when they use it back on me & on each other. Good stuff.
Well it is nice to know we walk the same planet..there’s so much negativity and hate right now sometimes it’s nice to know you still have loving human beings for neighbors..
Well true but he dealing with a average person. If you study human behaviour enough you see he playing out his role well. If he was to play the "HOW" game with me. I would call him out on the manipulation! He just playing on ones weekness.
Our mother was crazy, but she wasn't stupid. She taught us how to make people feel good about themselves before asking them for something. What goes around comes around, and I used that lesson one day after mom was old, and living with dementia in a nursing home. The county had obtained guardianship of mom's property. My sister and I had wanted to, but when I read what the law required of a guardian it was, for a family member, a bookkeeping nightmare, where every cent had to be accounted for, and periodic reports filed with the state. One day, after mom had a minor fall at the nursing home I got a call, and the nurse let slip that they always called county social services first, and us second. I was miffed, because while the county had charge of her money, we retained health care proxy, and legally should always be called called first because we were responsible for her care. So I called the county director of social services, and got him on the phone. I could have started angry, and waved our health care proxy around, but instead I spent the first five minutes of the conversation thanking him for the great job they were doing, and praising mom's social services case worker. THEN I brought up the issue of phone calls, noting that her health care was still in our hands, and we would like to be first call on the list. He agreed immediately, and said he would take care of it that afternoon. He might have said yes if I had come on strong and led with the health care proxy, anyway, but I spent a long career in newspapers dealing with bureaucrats, who can be pretty stubborn if they get their back up, even, and sometimes especially, if they are in the wrong, and I didn't want to take the chance. It was worth five minutes to make him feel appreciated, in a job where I'm sure he has fielded more than his share of complaints.
Chris Voss! I know this is going to make me seem self centered or just another person looking for your appreciation. I just want to give you a special shout out for the work your doing and have done. Your a genius. I am using your methods and it is amazing the results. A few areas I am using it is in my personal relationship with my girlfriend and my clients in business and with my local marathon gas station employees. This works great! Thank you for giving back. Take care! Your the best!
So juicy! This book has been on my reading list for a minute- buying now! Very interesting and applicable. Everything is sales. Everything is negotiation.
I love how these tactics make you have to leave your ego aside in a way... the other person feeling like they're in control and they won. Not your ego.
I am appreciated for your channel. In real life, nobody does teach it. And I lost a lot of jobs because I am not able to how to do negotiate with somebody. Thank you so much.
the first part sounds like Chris has a cold from other interviews, still his voice is a gift we don't all have. you have to train to get that tonality and voice variations, never get agitated with your customer, which ain't easy to do if you're dealing with a jerk.
it's interesting because about two months ago i went to a job interview for a position i had 0 professional experience in but had the technical knowledge, and when they asked me what made me apply for this job and stuff like that, i started with "i know you are asking for two years experience in this, but i have to be honest, i don't have that experience. however..." and proceeded to list the positives and why i believed i could fit the description of what they were looking for. i casually referenced the no experience point a couple of times during the conversation as well, but didnt linger on it and moved on to something else. maybe this strategy was part of it, but ended up getting the job.
I am sure I was going to watch only under 20 minutes of this video but I did reach the end and made notes along the way. Thanks guys, it's worth the time!
I watched full video and learned a lot. Thank you so much for putting this on TH-cam for free. Now I realized I have been using some of the tactics and sentences in my native language without knowing how it worked. And people have been using these psychological anchors on me without knowing they are getting the best out of me. It sure makes me a different person than I was 1 hour and 24 minutes before. I already started to practice this at my home with my wife and kids and getting positive results. I can't thank you enough because people like me are greedy to take advantage in every situation. I may sound like an a** kisser for thanking you a lot in this comment but these thoughts and words are generated right after the video is finished. There's a negotiation I am doing with you to get a reply on my comment. Thank you, you have done a great job with the editing there too.
And I know it seems like I forgot about you Lewis Howes but I also want to say thank you for all your work too. You are amazingly talented. And again... Thank you too
If you can hold your own againsta master negotiator, they will respect the hell out of you and they will want to do business with you in the future even if no deal is made that day!
First time watching one of your videos and I just want you to know that it's helping me immensely prepare for future conversations with a friend im trying to help with her alcoholism with the bonus of advise for my business. cant express how grateful I am!🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
Nobody doing better than you will ever criticize you, they will mentor you. That is powerful stuff. I have a bit of a streak of criticism in my life but I have definitely been working extremely hard to develop it into a habit of mentorship. I've been in my department at work for about a year and a half now and I'm quite familiar with all of our best practices some of which are better documented than others and it's challenging sometimes because I see so many opportunities on a daily basis to provide constructive criticism or mentorship to my fellow co-workers but at the same time it's not necessarily my place because I'm not a lead so I'm constantly asking myself do I help this individual perform this task and a better way or do I understand my role is not to always be involved in the way other people complete tasks and just focus on what I need to do. sometimes if it's safety related or a matter of adhering to company practices I feel more strongly about getting involved in other people working on tasks but in other instances where it's something that I can let go I really try to just understand that if I constantly try to get involved in other people completing tasks it's going to be ruinous to my own career for a variety of reasons...
1st time watching your channel And I just spent the most informative hour and 24 minutes on TH-cam that I ever have. Thank you very educational And I took away a lot to apply in life
Works with every violent person, just wait for them to clam down before you speak. Don't oppose them, don't defend their accusations, surprise them and stay silent. Never stops them being a lunatic though.
I love this most of life is deal making, from love, work, controlling your children to keep them safe and productive, any extra confidence you can acquire can help you go so far I'm going use every bit of these basic points
The crazy part about Chris Voss's method is, it's actually very simple ... but it's almost the polar opposites of what we have been taught. I never get tired of listening to him explain.
I love this interview and the explanation of the power of words to instill certain emotions in to the listener. This is as much as sales copy lesson as it is a neotiation lesson =. Great Interview Lewis! Thank you
@Boony Tooty Exactly, that supports the point. People will love someone no matter any of their flaws, except criticism. This shows the extreme effect that being a critic has on others' opinions of you.
I was a Flight Attendant for 30 yrs., and also have close friends in the hotel industry. His son's "charm" would never work on an upgrade! We have people use their " tactics" on us every day. Men in First Class learn my name, and then they use it in every sentence, while they are constantly asking for something extra. I see right thru them, and they come off as sleazy car salesmen. I usually tell them that I'm aware of their "Dale Carnegie" strategies. Just be genuine.
probably because you are a woman and less likely to be manipulated by people making you feel powerful because you are more sensitive than a lot of us men are. Just my guess on it, also not trying to bring up a gender debate or smthng
@@mironpataridis8605 I hope you are doing ok Miron, it's good sometimes to not overthink it. Negative thinking when reinforced can drain your energy and your passion for life. Also if what you say is true, this has been going on for centuries and is beyond what we can actually comprehend or fix. Ultimately all of this should not prevent anyone to live a good and happy free life. Cheers!
Thank you for positive statement about his master class. I’ve been considering it but after your comment I will move forward. Mark Schultz generationstocome.com
On the short advertisement section that y’all described it impacted the message I am trying to get out yet it doesn’t work for all people be to whom it does the message is blurry an full with doubt because it they are also the oppressor and to be a good oppressed is difficult.
Just listened to one of his Ted talks after someone mentioned him in a true crime video I was watching and wow he is a brilliant man! As an empath I love his definition of tactical empathy which is a great way to express the way I feel constantly to someone who doesn’t experience it the same way! Very moving.
Ok, this was probably the most useful video I have seen recently. I will probably watch it many times. Such a smart and useful questions. Such a great and smart and clear answers. Thank you both so much.
It seems like a lot of the things boil down to upfront self depreciation or negative aspects, and sometimes allowing someone else to justify or actually give credibility to yourself
You know what, I was reading "Mask of Masculinity" and incidentally it was this morning that I came across Voss in the chapter "The Alpha Mask." Few hours later, browsing through TH-cam, I came across this video. Wow, what coincidence.
Nah, the algorithm reads your mind to factor your memories into recommendations. The front facing camera as well as webcam cameras emit a laser that transfers the info. Security cameras can probably do it too to contribute to the government individual social intelligence collection. There's no such thing as coincidences.
He rolls his head upwards and lifts his eyes as he is completing the delivery of each sentence. It is as though he believes he is dispensing wisdom from on high that should not be challenged. His smooth friendly voice is in direct contrast to his body language. The head rolling creates a brief moment when he is looking down his nose at us. This contrast makes his seem creepy.
.....the environment that you negotiate in is important too. For me, if I need to chat a long or even short periods of time, walking together say in a park or a none busy street will relax me, but put me in a room where everything around me is still and quiet makes me uncomfortable. Like an interrogation room scene for me. Another example in when you drive and talk how comfortable is that, generally, you are happy whilst doing so, think back your conversations whilst driving, 90% happy faces, so environment surrounding is important as well.
To your point, I read a book that said that usually people have difficult conversations with others in the car because when they're driving they can't look to the other person's face. So yeah, environment greatly shapes what conversations we have and how we have them
@@FilipeSalgueiroo ....well, for me I have great conversations, I take quick glances at the person next to me, seems to work well. Driving and talking is so relaxing for most and seems happiness results as you drive.
@@nickfriend3629 If the person who I'm talking with is interesting then it almost doesn't matter the location but I for sure can concentrate a lot more on them if we're by the beach or somewhere calm. I personally don't like to talk in the car because I feel the need to look at someone but I've had really deep conversations while driving.
38:55 it's hilarious that this comes to mind but if I recall correctly the editors of Jackass would make the first drafts of the show extra raunchy so that when the studio inevitably asked them to dial it back a bit they would essentially get the go ahead on what they wanted in the first place.
@@mariaanast276 Grand risings. My reference to mental energy was a collective celebration of what humans are capable of. With our minds capable of infinite consciousness, I appreciate the imagination behind manifesting thoughtfulness in so many different scenarios.
"Every interaction we have with someone should leave them feeling better." I struggle a lot with personal relationships - I feel this advice might help me a lot - but it is very hard to ignore all my own complaints and needs when sh*t is hitting the fan, I forget about these kinds of strategies. Does anyone have any advice as to how to remember to apply these kinds of techniques in a personal relationship when your emotional investment is a lot higher? Extra info: I do therapy 3 times a week; I go to AA meetings and have quit all substance abuse; I am in a graduate developmental psychology program to try and better understand myself. I practice karate / mma 2 times a week; I also do 1000 situps / 250 push ups a day; and i'm constantly watching these types of videos / motivational videos; So i'm definitely trying!! Thanks in advance to anyone who answers!
It kinda sounds like you need things in your head to slow down a bit to give you an opportunity to choose your best strategy, and then respond. The activities that you are doing are great. Meditation would help you to develop the inner calm you are looking for, even when challenges arise. Just my 2 cents. Hope it helps
@K Rey It seems like you're asking how to make these strategies second nature, and if that is so, then all you have to do is practice. You have to get the reps in brother or sister. When I say practice, I mean alone, by yourself with pen and paper. First) Go into your minds eye to some events that have happened in your past where, "Higher emotional investment" is involved, review where you could have/ should have inserted this advice and replay the events how they should have gone. From what you've said you may have plenty to go over. Second) Project your minds eye into "possible future" situations that could occur with people you would invest emotionally with and play the events how you would hope to act. Persistence is the key, you have to make these techniques a habit and it takes is spaced repetition. TLDR; All you need is a strong plan: check this video out from James Clear, it may help led you to the key you are seeking th-cam.com/video/jeqaIYchAI0/w-d-xo.html Blessing and hope this helps my friend! And btw, Nice job on your development, I look forward to your continued success.
hey! i just got an employee discount at the supermarket by doing what he said ! i got a grocery bag for free. she charged me the 25 cents, broke the change and gave me the quarter right back ! and smiled and winked ! this guy is brilliant.
![Everything You [PROBABLY] Don't Know About Negotiation | Chris Voss](/img/n.gif)
Im trying to learn business as a 39 year old guy. All my 20s I got taken advantage of in everything, buying cars , paying too much for apartments whatever. Im glad TH-cam exists for guys like me who were never taught shit growing up. Appreciate the upload 🙏
Find someone successful in your business or the biz you want to get into and ask them for advice or help... you’d be amazed how many people want to help you...
Hahaha !!!! I loved your comment !
Applies to me too ... I am learning now thought.
‘… who were never taught shit growing up’? Right, blame everyone else for not listening and doing your homework.
Way to go!
@@Mr.Monta77 Why? Just Why?How is that relevant to this topic? I’m not saying it isn’t an accurate statement but it’s not relevant here. This is about negotiating and not accountability.
One of my favorite things to do when dealing with ANYTHING on the phone (customer service reps, whatever) is learn their name, ask how their day is (and sound sincere) and then, depending on how they react to the interaction, either fire off exactly what I want or explain the situation and ask "what can we do to get over this?"
I've actually hoped for them to say no when I ask because chances are, if I think they can help, they're now on my side and want to help. I've essentially formed a team with them and coached them onto my side. I've done the "sounds like there's nothing you can do for me" and surprisingly, as soon as that comes up, they're jumping to help (I discovered this inadvertantly myself). I've also learned to never loose my cool unless I'm looking to terminate the conversation.
“Talk to someone about themselves and they'll listen for hours.”
― Dale Carnegie
i am so good at that. it works perfectly lol.
They call it ass kissing.
“How To Win Friends And Influence People”!
Classic book.
I thought this quote was from Benjamin Disraeli?
I took his Master Class and I would take it a thousand times again until his knowledge gets printed in my DNA. This guys is out of this world.
Hey, quick question. How much $$ was for the course? This guy's a smooth operator I'll say.
I have same question how can we get this class
Like 200$ for the MasterClass subscription
Which one?
Should have said more specifically. Which guy?
Recently found Lewis. I really like how he repeats questions in example form and always asks for more examples and explanation. Something most interviewers don’t do. Much easier to understand. Thanks. Subbed.
I cannot tell if what i admire about Chris is the calm collected way in which he speaks, timing of, pausing and voice with wording i use that most people don't.
I want this guy to read me bedtime stories. he's so calm. its probably for the best he's a good guy though. I wouldn't want to argue with him. lol. seriously though he should narrate his book.
Right, he has the best voice.
It is his “late night radio host voice” which he uses on purpose according to another video that I watched made to promote a class that he offers.
I noticed that but couldn't put my finger on it but you nailed it!
his voice is soft and mellow, deep and sure however it is word-windy, and carries the whispering of fakery all through it... all the goodness of a voice mined for manipulation.
I like how you get your guest to break down what they say down in very applicable ways. Thank YOU
I could fall asleep listening to Chris speak. His knowledge is a melody of words that feed my emotional intelligence. The empathy that leads the human to touch out compassionately for truce & peace is a lullaby for life long lessons in mindfulness. Thank you Lewis and Chris for this fantastic interview ⭐
Wow, so beautifully written, profound. "His knowledge is a melody of words that feed my emotional intelligence."
Well put
That's why there are so many fatherless kids on the plant lol
@@ettube8686 hmmm
@@obiedashinobi1322 zombie epox
amazing advice ! every kid in every school should learn this from Kindergarten onward and have the course repeated every year as a part of the curriculum ! Learning to think things through in advance is a key life skill
My dad who owns a company taught me when giving quotations to talk about the customer enthusiasticly finding common interests more than the job, and then once the price has been given advise them to get other quotations, shake there hand wish them a good day and then notify them you must leave as you have more jobs to quote
Also if other company's are mentioned to say we do not put down other company's we only concentrate on ensuring our customers are happy which means we don't need to slate competitors as we get Reccomendations
AGREED! When I first started my small business I used to get friends who wanted to just hang out at my store or to call me on the phone and wanted to BS all day. I used to tell them "Hey, I'd LOVE to sit here and talk, but I have a BUNCH of quotes to do, paperwork, orders to place with my suppliers...". They'd give me a look of surprise and say "Are you really THAT busy?". I'd say "YES" to give *everyone* the perception that we were growing rapidly, selling lots of stuff, people liked us... I honestly wasn't that busy at all, but "success breeds success" (and even the PERCEPTION of success!) and soon enough we had enough business on a shoestring budget that even my CPA asked "How are you doing this? I have a lot of clients and NO ONE is in the black and profitable with no debt EVERY SINGLE MONTH like you are!".
@@SBluesBrotherhood keep smashing it bro that's what I like to hear
yuuuuck.. just the type of quote I would not choose
@@karate4348 you wouldn't choose a quote like this?
Confidence and knowing beyond a doubt where u sit on the spectrum of self worth.
🧡
Every Voss video is a must watch.
💯💯💯
I would add must watch one on the daily repeatedly.
Wait! There are More?
I bought the water because of it😜🤪
What s a Voss Video?
Excellent! I’ve had the privilege to take some classes with Voss and Steve Shull. Implemented some subtle changes on emails I send and it produced great results. I highly recommend Chris Voss’ book...it helps in all areas of your life....not just business.
I adopted two boys,middle schoolers, orphaned by addiction three years ago.. Been following Chris Voss about a year now...this stuff is incredibly effective.
Thank you, you are a great human being.
@@Wa7edmenalnass Takes one to know one, my friend. 😁
Wow...truly committed people that have such meaning and a dedication to love and truly know what life’s about. Adoption is one of the godly definitions of humanity.
@@pandabear631 1) Wow I am blushing brick red hahaha
2) Please know...*they* "saved" me. They remind me to make time for play, to think before I speak...I'm richer for this experience.
Mr. Voss' tactical empathy has been my most effective strategy. My heart trills when they use it back on me & on each other. Good stuff.
Well it is nice to know we walk the same planet..there’s so much negativity and hate right now sometimes it’s nice to know you still have loving human beings for neighbors..
Wow, Chris Voss is so calm, collected, great listener and asking powerful HOW questions.
Well true but he dealing with a average person. If you study human behaviour enough you see he playing out his role well.
If he was to play the "HOW" game with me. I would call him out on the manipulation! He just playing on ones weekness.
Our mother was crazy, but she wasn't stupid. She taught us how to make people feel good about themselves before asking them for something. What goes around comes around, and I used that lesson one day after mom was old, and living with dementia in a nursing home. The county had obtained guardianship of mom's property. My sister and I had wanted to, but when I read what the law required of a guardian it was, for a family member, a bookkeeping nightmare, where every cent had to be accounted for, and periodic reports filed with the state. One day, after mom had a minor fall at the nursing home I got a call, and the nurse let slip that they always called county social services first, and us second. I was miffed, because while the county had charge of her money, we retained health care proxy, and legally should always be called called first because we were responsible for her care. So I called the county director of social services, and got him on the phone. I could have started angry, and waved our health care proxy around, but instead I spent the first five minutes of the conversation thanking him for the great job they were doing, and praising mom's social services case worker. THEN I brought up the issue of phone calls, noting that her health care was still in our hands, and we would like to be first call on the list. He agreed immediately, and said he would take care of it that afternoon. He might have said yes if I had come on strong and led with the health care proxy, anyway, but I spent a long career in newspapers dealing with bureaucrats, who can be pretty stubborn if they get their back up, even, and sometimes especially, if they are in the wrong, and I didn't want to take the chance. It was worth five minutes to make him feel appreciated, in a job where I'm sure he has fielded more than his share of complaints.
My grandmother used to tell me, "You can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar! ". The same thing as your very smart mother! ❤😊
Chris Voss! I know this is going to make me seem self centered or just another person looking for your appreciation. I just want to give you a special shout out for the work your doing and have done. Your a genius. I am using your methods and it is amazing the results. A few areas I am using it is in my personal relationship with my girlfriend and my clients in business and with my local marathon gas station employees.
This works great! Thank you for giving back. Take care! Your the best!
So juicy! This book has been on my reading list for a minute- buying now! Very interesting and applicable. Everything is sales. Everything is negotiation.
I love how these tactics make you have to leave your ego aside in a way... the other person feeling like they're in control and they won. Not your ego.
I am appreciated for your channel. In real life, nobody does teach it. And I lost a lot of jobs because I am not able to how to do negotiate with somebody. Thank you so much.
This man has the "perfect" voice for what he does!
The late night radio DJ voice. I can so hear him when I read his advice on the late night radio DJ voice ...
His voice is a lot like an enforcer for a company that collects on bad debts...
Opiates
@@lindseylim8026 oo9
@Stay Strong That's a good name, "Stay Strong". I like that...it's original! Peace
Emails -"a word spoken is as light as air, but when in writing is always there"..#papertrail
If you're not willing to walk away, you cant negotiate.
“Talk to someone about themselves and they'll listen for hours.”
― Dale Carnegie
When you dealing with money mongers mam.
@@shaneskinner9128 depending their age.
This man deserves a kiss...and i'm straight!! Thanks Chris and Lewis; making the world a better place by sharing your heart.
I think the he best interviews happen when you let the guest roll & flow, without having to constantly interject in between.
I'm an instant fan and I believe almost everything he says
More proof that it works, lol
@@TheRealFlenuan ⁵⁵⁵⁵⁵is the
Why?(
How come?
Almost? LOL
I think this video goes down as the best TH-cam video I have seen all year. Good job Lewis Howes, you are a fantastic interviewer.
Aww love that " every interaction should leave the other person better"!!! Beautiful ❤️
the first part sounds like Chris has a cold from other interviews, still his voice is a gift we don't all have. you have to train to get that tonality and voice variations, never get agitated with your customer, which ain't easy to do if you're dealing with a jerk.
Depending ....some need correction
Chris Voss is the Boss. I can't get enough from this guy. This is one of my favorite guests of Lewis Howes.
Wow he’s lulling me to chill during this video. Great voice and perfect delivery
it's interesting because about two months ago i went to a job interview for a position i had 0 professional experience in but had the technical knowledge, and when they asked me what made me apply for this job and stuff like that, i started with "i know you are asking for two years experience in this, but i have to be honest, i don't have that experience. however..." and proceeded to list the positives and why i believed i could fit the description of what they were looking for. i casually referenced the no experience point a couple of times during the conversation as well, but didnt linger on it and moved on to something else. maybe this strategy was part of it, but ended up getting the job.
I am sure I was going to watch only under 20 minutes of this video but I did reach the end and made notes along the way. Thanks guys, it's worth the time!
Can you write your notes lol I'd like some without the efforr
Omg I LOVE his voice !!
It is SOOOO soothing and reassuring.
Anyone else feel that ?
I feel that .
Get a room
I watched full video and learned a lot. Thank you so much for putting this on TH-cam for free. Now I realized I have been using some of the tactics and sentences in my native language without knowing how it worked. And people have been using these psychological anchors on me without knowing they are getting the best out of me. It sure makes me a different person than I was 1 hour and 24 minutes before. I already started to practice this at my home with my wife and kids and getting positive results. I can't thank you enough because people like me are greedy to take advantage in every situation. I may sound like an a** kisser for thanking you a lot in this comment but these thoughts and words are generated right after the video is finished. There's a negotiation I am doing with you to get a reply on my comment. Thank you, you have done a great job with the editing there too.
And I know it seems like I forgot about you Lewis Howes but I also want to say thank you for all your work too. You are amazingly talented. And again... Thank you too
I'd love to see a video talking about how to successfully *respond* to some of these tactics to protect yourself from the other person's strategies
I'd pay to see that.
Be honest about it. Call it out if you see it.
Don't drop your guard.
If you can hold your own againsta master negotiator, they will respect the hell out of you and they will want to do business with you in the future even if no deal is made that day!
Im so confused as to why he didn't narrate his own book on audible. His voice is awesome. (***Updated not so confused anymore)
First time watching one of your videos and I just want you to know that it's helping me immensely prepare for future conversations with a friend im trying to help with her alcoholism with the bonus of advise for my business. cant express how grateful I am!🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
You are a great human being! I wish you the best success and that your words and encouragement will do miracles with your friend.
Nobody doing better than you will ever criticize you, they will mentor you. That is powerful stuff. I have a bit of a streak of criticism in my life but I have definitely been working extremely hard to develop it into a habit of mentorship. I've been in my department at work for about a year and a half now and I'm quite familiar with all of our best practices some of which are better documented than others and it's challenging sometimes because I see so many opportunities on a daily basis to provide constructive criticism or mentorship to my fellow co-workers but at the same time it's not necessarily my place because I'm not a lead so I'm constantly asking myself do I help this individual perform this task and a better way or do I understand my role is not to always be involved in the way other people complete tasks and just focus on what I need to do. sometimes if it's safety related or a matter of adhering to company practices I feel more strongly about getting involved in other people working on tasks but in other instances where it's something that I can let go I really try to just understand that if I constantly try to get involved in other people completing tasks it's going to be ruinous to my own career for a variety of reasons...
I can really relate to your situation.
Been watching you for the last two days. Honestly I could hear you talk all day. Thanks Lewis 😊
I have SO MUCH to learn!
1st time watching your channel And I just spent the most informative hour and 24 minutes on TH-cam that I ever have. Thank you very educational And I took away a lot to apply in life
Works with every violent person, just wait for them to clam down before you speak. Don't oppose them, don't defend their accusations, surprise them and stay silent. Never stops them being a lunatic though.
What an incredible interview!! Tremendous amount of value!! Thank you so much!!!
Yay! Lewis I'm so happy you did this interview!😎 Thank you.
I love this most of life is deal making, from love, work, controlling your children to keep them safe and productive, any extra confidence you can acquire can help you go so far I'm going use every bit of these basic points
Chris Voss has to have one of the best voices I’ve ever heard
one of the best interviews I have seen, the information he shares is of high quality
Thank you so much 🙂
The crazy part about Chris Voss's method is, it's actually very simple ... but it's almost the polar opposites of what we have been taught. I never get tired of listening to him explain.
I love this interview and the explanation of the power of words to instill certain emotions in to the listener. This is as much as sales copy lesson as it is a neotiation lesson =. Great Interview Lewis! Thank you
“Pay no attention to what the critics say. A statue has never been erected in honor of a critic.”
― Jean Sibelius
I love this quote! I must recycle this with the assholes in my life?
@Boony Tooty Exactly, that supports the point. People will love someone no matter any of their flaws, except criticism. This shows the extreme effect that being a critic has on others' opinions of you.
Lol so wrong on so many levels.
Except Roger Ebert.
apnews.com/article/32ff8c1c7ce040549fc029f234d262b2
critics can be very useful, if you are capable of viewing things from their perspective.
I like how you’ve structured your videos keeps me still engaged 👏🏾
I was a Flight Attendant for 30 yrs., and also have close friends in the hotel industry. His son's "charm" would never work on an upgrade! We have people use their " tactics" on us every day. Men in First Class learn my name, and then they use it in every sentence, while they are constantly asking for something extra. I see right thru them, and they come off as sleazy car salesmen. I usually tell them that I'm aware of their "Dale Carnegie" strategies. Just be genuine.
probably because you are a woman and less likely to be manipulated by people making you feel powerful because you are more sensitive than a lot of us men are. Just my guess on it, also not trying to bring up a gender debate or smthng
Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kiss of an enemy is deceitful.
Thanks for this, everything in life is a negotiation.
Thank you for asking all the correct questions. I believe this is the best video I have ever wanted to ingest every word.Thank you:)
That voice is everything!
What a knowledgeable person. I wish they were teaching this at school.
@@mironpataridis8605 I hope you are doing ok Miron, it's good sometimes to not overthink it. Negative thinking when reinforced can drain your energy and your passion for life. Also if what you say is true, this has been going on for centuries and is beyond what we can actually comprehend or fix. Ultimately all of this should not prevent anyone to live a good and happy free life. Cheers!
Thank you for this interview. Nice discussion.
Everyone always confess to the good cop 1st. So True
I highly recommend his Master Class. I learned so much!
Definitely!
Thank you for positive statement about his master class. I’ve been considering it but after your comment I will move forward. Mark Schultz generationstocome.com
Thanks was considering the Master Class I will now commit. 🇹🇹
On the short advertisement section that y’all described it impacted the message I am trying to get out yet it doesn’t work for all people be to whom it does the message is blurry an full with doubt because it they are also the oppressor and to be a good oppressed is difficult.
What’s it called?
Being nice and gentle is the key. 🙂
His voice is so even and soothing
hes got a cold, or else a long night out drinking....sounds and looks like he has a cold.(clips with the headsets on)
Just listened to one of his Ted talks after someone mentioned him in a true crime video I was watching and wow he is a brilliant man! As an empath I love his definition of tactical empathy which is a great way to express the way I feel constantly to someone who doesn’t experience it the same way! Very moving.
Loved this! Excellent subtle tips which I think I need to start practising !
Ok, this was probably the most useful video I have seen recently. I will probably watch it many times. Such a smart and useful questions. Such a great and smart and clear answers. Thank you both so much.
This is so good listening to the man himself, much better than reading his book. Thanks so much for this interview!
Chris Vos is on another level. Thank you for interviewing him.
Love how engaged and interactive both are:)
What a likeable guy! Thanks so much for sharing this great interview!!
It seems like a lot of the things boil down to upfront self depreciation or negative aspects, and sometimes allowing someone else to justify or actually give credibility to yourself
Thank you for sharing Lewis!
I came across his course in the MasterClass app
Is the masterclass good?
The last tip “ it seems like you are powerless here !” It’s the best piece of advice in the whole video ! Loved it ..
This is one of the best interviews!
Thank you so much!
I’m super nice to everyone and it opens a lot of doors for me
Amazing interview with so many lessons that anyone can apply for a better life
You know what, I was reading "Mask of Masculinity" and incidentally it was this morning that I came across Voss in the chapter "The Alpha Mask." Few hours later, browsing through TH-cam, I came across this video. Wow, what coincidence.
Nah, the algorithm reads your mind to factor your memories into recommendations. The front facing camera as well as webcam cameras emit a laser that transfers the info. Security cameras can probably do it too to contribute to the government individual social intelligence collection.
There's no such thing as coincidences.
@@SirTorcharite hmmm interesting observation. ;-)
When I was a child I would ask why all the time... why why why why why... Thank you for reminding me to ask why again!
One of the best interviews that I've seen in my life.
Absolutely Brilliant! Loved the show!
Love how Voss got Lewis to talk about himself...I’ve learned so much Thank You cheers from Pennsylvania 👍👍👍🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸. Happy to say new subscriber
As polite and nice as this guy comes across I still get a creepy salesman vibe while listening to this conversation.
He rolls his head upwards and lifts his eyes as he is completing the delivery of each sentence. It is as though he believes he is dispensing wisdom from on high that should not be challenged.
His smooth friendly voice is in direct contrast to his body language.
The head rolling creates a brief moment when he is looking down his nose at us.
This contrast makes his seem creepy.
Like.. The
S h a d o w
Knows......
Voice and calmness....wow !
Great video !
.....the environment that you negotiate in is important too. For me, if I need to chat a long or even short periods of time, walking together say in a park or a none busy street will relax me, but put me in a room where everything around me is still and quiet makes me uncomfortable. Like an interrogation room scene for me. Another example in when you drive and talk how comfortable is that, generally, you are happy whilst doing so, think back your conversations whilst driving, 90% happy faces, so environment surrounding is important as well.
To your point, I read a book that said that usually people have difficult conversations with others in the car because when they're driving they can't look to the other person's face. So yeah, environment greatly shapes what conversations we have and how we have them
@@FilipeSalgueiroo ....well, for me I have great conversations, I take quick glances at the person next to me, seems to work well. Driving and talking is so relaxing for most and seems happiness results as you drive.
@@nickfriend3629 If the person who I'm talking with is interesting then it almost doesn't matter the location but I for sure can concentrate a lot more on them if we're by the beach or somewhere calm. I personally don't like to talk in the car because I feel the need to look at someone but I've had really deep conversations while driving.
The second interviewee seems more open and trust worthy. Win win is the type of negotiating the world needs now.
38:55 it's hilarious that this comes to mind but if I recall correctly the editors of Jackass would make the first drafts of the show extra raunchy so that when the studio inevitably asked them to dial it back a bit they would essentially get the go ahead on what they wanted in the first place.
Mental energy is such a powerful force when harnessed masterfully.
You mean emotional energy.
@@mariaanast276 Grand risings. My reference to mental energy was a collective celebration of what humans are capable of. With our minds capable of infinite consciousness, I appreciate the imagination behind manifesting thoughtfulness in so many different scenarios.
Indeed
It's called demonic
@@mariaanast276 ...was that a question?
Happy Thanksgiving!! We will all get through this somehow. 💖🌈
I really enjoyed this vid. I learned at lot. Thanks.
Great interview, as usual. Very interesting guest. Bought the book.
Was the book worth of it once you See the vid (s)?
Never Split the Difference is the best book I've read so far in 2020. Loved it. Highly recommended.
"Every interaction we have with someone should leave them feeling better." I struggle a lot with personal relationships - I feel this advice might help me a lot - but it is very hard to ignore all my own complaints and needs when sh*t is hitting the fan, I forget about these kinds of strategies. Does anyone have any advice as to how to remember to apply these kinds of techniques in a personal relationship when your emotional investment is a lot higher?
Extra info: I do therapy 3 times a week; I go to AA meetings and have quit all substance abuse; I am in a graduate developmental psychology program to try and better understand myself. I practice karate / mma 2 times a week; I also do 1000 situps / 250 push ups a day; and i'm constantly watching these types of videos / motivational videos; So i'm definitely trying!! Thanks in advance to anyone who answers!
It kinda sounds like you need things in your head to slow down a bit to give you an opportunity to choose your best strategy, and then respond. The activities that you are doing are great. Meditation would help you to develop the inner calm you are looking for, even when challenges arise. Just my 2 cents. Hope it helps
@K Rey
It seems like you're asking how to make these strategies second nature, and if that is so, then all you have to do is practice. You have to get the reps in brother or sister. When I say practice, I mean alone, by yourself with pen and paper. First) Go into your minds eye to some events that have happened in your past where, "Higher emotional investment" is involved, review where you could have/ should have inserted this advice and replay the events how they should have gone. From what you've said you may have plenty to go over. Second) Project your minds eye into "possible future" situations that could occur with people you would invest emotionally with and play the events how you would hope to act. Persistence is the key, you have to make these techniques a habit and it takes is spaced repetition.
TLDR; All you need is a strong plan: check this video out from James Clear, it may help led you to the key you are seeking th-cam.com/video/jeqaIYchAI0/w-d-xo.html
Blessing and hope this helps my friend!
And btw, Nice job on your development, I look forward to your continued success.
That was awesome! You got me fired up to get my shit together and kick start my TH-cam today. Keep up the good work brother 👍🏽
Loved listening to the interview. He is amazing! Great job Lewis!!
If you don’t ask you won’t get. Love the creation of emotional framework.
Thank you so much for your feedback 🙂
i have used that "How do you expect me to..." many times haha XD! works great in traffic ticket scenarios and billing/customer support issues.
I’d sincerely love to hear the traffic ticket story!
Thank You Lewis Howes For Your Educational Videos.
hey! i just got an employee discount at the supermarket by doing what he said ! i got a grocery bag for free. she charged me the 25 cents, broke the change and gave me the quarter right back ! and smiled and winked ! this guy is brilliant.
Are u using the word brilliant over a grocery bag and .25 cents. Lmao 🤣🤣🤣
It adds up... small practice count
Small stakes practice for high stakes results.
Priceless. They’ll always correct you
Bought his book last year.. such an insightful book and a great great investment
Im so confused as to why he didn't narrate his own book on audible. His voice is awesome. (***Updated not so confused anymore)
nose talker, thats why, cluged nose
Check out his Masterclass on Negotiating. He narrates the whole thing and his voice is so captivating..
Bahaha he calls it his DJ voice 😂 you guys need to do this! Talk slower, pace your words, and dip down at the end...watch more videos, he's the man ..
I know I had a crush on him before....now🥰🥰🥰
@@inkandgrowrich9793 I never listened to a Masterclass. Thats a great tip!
_My negotiation skills are average but I definitely picked up some tips_ 🔥🔥
You have lost 36 pounds