Timing on this was great for me. Just had a serious argument with my mom today and I'm trying to figure out how to approach the situation next time. Also Lewis, just wanna say how much I appreciate these interviews. You've introduced me to so many authors of the books i have on my reading list (and books I own!) and it's sooo great to be able to attach a face and a voice to the name.
I read his book a while back whilst negotiating a divorce with a very difficult man, and it really helped me. The book is FASCINATING. I can’t get enough of Chris. Thank you
Hi Lewis, I just love when you have Chris Vuoss on! (Intentionally spelled with his NY accent lol) so many gems and takeaways when he speaks, he always got you sayin' "mmmm". Me too for that matter! All the best to you!
Lewis: With much, much, much respect, it’s nice that you finally have a guest who does not need a high chair. I say this respectfully. Yes, of course, I also enjoyed Mr. Voss’ comments. Cheers.
0:56 I love Chris Voss but every time I hear his voice I expect to see Al Pacino and start flashing back to Donnie Brasco and The Devil’s Advocate…. it’s DEAD ON!
this is probably one of the best interview ive ever wittnessed. i was focused and facinated with this interview, and it wasnt even the content per say it waas the ability for this man to asq questions. I could have watched this all year, unbelieably amazing at asking questions my new hero
What an amazing interview! I get good vibes from Mr. Chris Voss. He’s using his power to make things better. Him and the interviewer. I am truly inspired.
His negotiating philosophy is well supported by modern psychology findings in communication studies. He's recommending techniques like the ones that therapists use to get agreements from people to stop using heroin lol😂Deeply insightful. He has an intuitive genius but also it lines up with science strongly behind it. This is "the goods"!
Example of Steps (around 31:30): 1. Say, "I'm going to ruin your day." (No-oriented question) 2. Acknowledge you're coming across as another greedy person asking for another day. 3. Ask how much trouble going to get person in to ask for free upgrade.
Once again, Greatest lessions and learnings! I always get to learn new things from Chris, Whenver I watch and listen to him and special thanks to Lewis as he had asked him very powerful and simple questions that had chris to spill the beans of golden nuggets.
I always advise my guests when we hit it for the bazaar shopping for the first time: everybody has to find their very own unique bargaining style… mine is similar to Criss’ but I had seen some people better in many other techniques :-) I perfected mine… also because I enjoy in it a lot and I love socialising with the sellers :-) and joking and laughing and charming and all that jazz 🎉
It is annoying when i encounter people who are constantly trying to negotiate everything and arent just having a conversation. These are good 'tactics', but if they arent actually a part of who you are and if you cant turn them off occasionally and just talk to people, you're going to make people want you to just shut up and go away and feel sorry for your family who has to put up with you.
I think people don't necessarily feel safe being able to say no, what makes them feel safe is they they've been given the opportunity to say no. Giving someone the opportunity to say no automatically gives them the impression that they have the upper hand, they're incontrol of the situation. This makes them more inclined to say yes because it was originally implied that they would say no, now they feel as though they are doing "a good thing" by saying yes.
In my job, we are advised not to say "no"; instead we were encouraged to use a different way of saying "no" and that comes the difficult part - getting choices that somewhat similar to the customer's preference. 😅
Here’s my 2c on why Zoom meetings are worse. It’s not the visual information that’s missing. Instead it’s having 8 people (say) looking intensely at you and having to pay attention to all those with the same intensity. And not knowing if anyone is really looking at you. It provokes a lot of anxiety!! IRL you know if someone is looking at you and you also know all people at the meeting are not expected to show such levels of intensity.
aha moment to me, and also connect some dots along my journey, proves the oppsite is the way. i would implement motivate and genarate NO intead of Yes.
😂 I just walked into cvs and tried the I’m going to running your day because they didn’t have the meds and Uber customer needed - she what’s What!!!?? . I said in need this type of meds but you only have this on the shelves - she said ooh that’s nothing ran to the back and got it for me .. took her up then let her down with grace . 😂😂
Different things- when u negotiate under pressure it’s one tactic (it’s all about manipulation get result in a particular moment). When you negotiate for long term - you have to utilise sympathy and other side’s persons point of view (when you Agree on your terms that are both comfortable about - then long term productive relationships can start). 1+1=2 but sometimes 1+1=11
As for 1:13:00 and the "energy" you can perceive in-person but not over Zoom calls - There is research (and intuition) suggesting that aromatized chemical signals, including pheromones, can be perceived by humans (even more so by animals), allowing for us to sense many things without any visual, auditory or tactile cues. If you've ever been able to "smell" anger in another human (anger is probably the strongest emotion I can pick up via olfaction) or noticed that your cat/dog can tell what mood you're in without reading your face and body language, this idea might be more intuitive. My pets, who have their own bedroom and don't see me relax at night, can tell when I enter the alpha brain state, triggering them to become very disruptive in order to get my attention and steal it away from my flow (normally within seconds of achieving alpha state, impossible to be a coincidence). There is a lot of information in the air. There is also a study demonstrating that men and women can tell who of the opposite sex is fertile via pheromones.
A deep conversation between two men learned and profited much by deeply caring for others. Interrupted the video to get a haircut; put the principles into action, and got the haircut free - without asking!!
There is also a cultural element here. For example, when a Japanese buyer says “Yes”, it means Yes, I heard what you said. It doesn’t mean I agree with you! Irish people do not have words for yes or no in Gaelic. They say I did and I didn’t. Bear in mind international cultural customs & ways of doing business.
I remember when I was a cashier in the men’s department, in my work they didn’t had sweater vests so I had to go to other stores. So customers started to ask me about my vests n where were they in the store, I said the truth, we do not have any sweater vests here. Manager’s offices heard about this, a week later we were selling sweater vests. Manager came around my area, and invited me to purchase from our own merchandise, I said, are you going to gift me a vest? If they see me wearing our merchandise they will fly away very soon. No, I was told. By that time, I already had enough sweater vests, colors, patterns etc. If men saw me wearing them somehow I provoked them. They didn’t wanted me to gift me one……lol….. I didn’t care, I had enough vests already, I was just trying to see if they would gift me one. I still have those vests…….. People would constantly asked me about my wardrobe, I do get much attention n I’m very good at selling, well used to be…….lol…...
Timing on this was great for me. Just had a serious argument with my mom today and I'm trying to figure out how to approach the situation next time. Also Lewis, just wanna say how much I appreciate these interviews. You've introduced me to so many authors of the books i have on my reading list (and books I own!) and it's sooo great to be able to attach a face and a voice to the name.
Glad this was helpful for you🧡
Yeah except the second part, it's easier with a terrorist than to negotiate with mama 🤣🤣🤣 Update us what of it, I want to know 😂
Thanks 😊p
@@lewishowesdoes it seem crazy to assume Chris Voss’s work will largely revolutionize mental health care…
The advice about getting to no abd what this means has been incredibly useful. I am glad that Lewis and Chris are now a key part of my life.
I read his book a while back whilst negotiating a divorce with a very difficult man, and it really helped me. The book is FASCINATING. I can’t get enough of Chris. Thank you
So happy to hear you are finding value! 🧡
Same
Persuasion is really all about knowing what motivates humans and when to apply it!
This reminds me of the principle of flirting with everyone. It's such a great attitude to have in everyday life.
It's hard to top Chris Voss as an iconic guest/leader/mentor, etc. all good things ... Much appreciated Mr. Lewis Howes
Thank you for taking the time out of your day to check out the interview! So glad you enjoyed it🧡
The point is always leaving people better than you found them. Absolutely!
Hi Lewis, I just love when you have Chris Vuoss on! (Intentionally spelled with his NY accent lol) so many gems and takeaways when he speaks, he always got you sayin' "mmmm". Me too for that matter! All the best to you!
That guy is a genius ! The hotel upgrade thing is GOAT !
Lewis, you are a modern day Napoleon Hill. Thanks
You're welcome,thank you for being here 🧡
He got me at the part where he was talking about angels singing in the sunshine because of the word yes😂 Thank you Lord for today's lesson!❤
Lewis: With much, much, much respect, it’s nice that you finally have a guest who does not need a high chair. I say this respectfully. Yes, of course, I also enjoyed Mr. Voss’ comments. Cheers.
Pure brilliance love it!!
Chris voss and Lewis are the best!!!
Appreciate you and your support🧡
Outstanding interview ...
Thank you gentlemen
Chris's magical powers to get other people talking, even the interviewers, masterful. "Let me be fascinated" - brilliant
6:00 coming to grip with what “yes/no” actually means is one’s first turning point in ANY negotiation
0:56 I love Chris Voss but every time I hear his voice I expect to see Al Pacino and start flashing back to Donnie Brasco and The Devil’s Advocate…. it’s DEAD ON!
25:00 getting a hotel upgrade for free and making the person feel good for it. It’s all about the emotional journey you take them through
this is probably one of the best interview ive ever wittnessed. i was focused and facinated with this interview, and it wasnt even the content per say it waas the ability for this man to asq questions. I could have watched this all year, unbelieably amazing at asking questions my new hero
Thank you for taking the time out of your day to check out the interview! So glad you enjoyed it🧡
I LOVE Chris Voss !!!!!!! Thanks for this.
You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡
What an amazing interview! I get good vibes from Mr. Chris Voss. He’s using his power to make things better. Him and the interviewer. I am truly inspired.
Thanks for being here!
His negotiating philosophy is well supported by modern psychology findings in communication studies. He's recommending techniques like the ones that therapists use to get agreements from people to stop using heroin lol😂Deeply insightful. He has an intuitive genius but also it lines up with science strongly behind it. This is "the goods"!
Great video Lewis! Thank you
Thank you so much for watching!
Lewis another great podcast! I follow everything you do! Thank you 🇨🇦💕
Chris Voss da boss
Example of Steps (around 31:30):
1. Say, "I'm going to ruin your day." (No-oriented question)
2. Acknowledge you're coming across as another greedy person asking for another day.
3. Ask how much trouble going to get person in to ask for free upgrade.
After just 10 minutes this is gold , am planing to open my private practice thank you !!!!!
You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡
@@lewishowes 💛
Solid interview. As always, Lewis!!
Thanks Lewis! For sharing your story about networking event. I really appreciate
You're welcome!
Once again, Greatest lessions and learnings! I always get to learn new things from Chris, Whenver I watch and listen to him and special thanks to Lewis as he had asked him very powerful and simple questions that had chris to spill the beans of golden nuggets.
You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡
Great discussion
Thank you so much! 🧡
This was so good ❤
🧡
Thanks
I learned something useful here... Thanks for sharing.
You're welcome,thank you for being here 🧡
Thanks Lewis ❤
You're welcome, thank you for being here 🧡
I just love listening both of you
Thank you so much!
I always advise my guests when we hit it for the bazaar shopping for the first time: everybody has to find their very own unique bargaining style… mine is similar to Criss’ but I had seen some people better in many other techniques :-) I perfected mine… also because I enjoy in it a lot and I love socialising with the sellers :-) and joking and laughing and charming and all that jazz 🎉
شكرا❤ Thank you so much
Awesome interview!
Glad you enjoyed it!
loved the video - watched it all - the questions were great and i loved all the little mmmmhmms - very satisfying
Chris, may I say, you are fantastic. Where are your master classes?
Nature is beautiful ❤️🌹 I can't wait to see your next video 📸😍 I love your content full 🌕 watched
Appreciate you and your support🧡
Makes sense! Absolutely!
Thanks for being here! 🧡
It is annoying when i encounter people who are constantly trying to negotiate everything and arent just having a conversation. These are good 'tactics', but if they arent actually a part of who you are and if you cant turn them off occasionally and just talk to people, you're going to make people want you to just shut up and go away and feel sorry for your family who has to put up with you.
It sounds like you are really not going to like this sentence
This is great knowledge 🙏 thank you.
You're welcome,thank you for being here 🧡
Excellent interview, great on point questions and a very strong closer 👏
Very good Video, to the both of you.🌎❤️😇
Glad you enjoyed it!
I think people don't necessarily feel safe being able to say no, what makes them feel safe is they they've been given the opportunity to say no. Giving someone the opportunity to say no automatically gives them the impression that they have the upper hand, they're incontrol of the situation. This makes them more inclined to say yes because it was originally implied that they would say no, now they feel as though they are doing "a good thing" by saying yes.
Perfectly articulated!
Wow, great insight
Good point Emily 😊
agree
I've felt comfortable with no, real comfortable
6:30 yes and no does not mean yes and know. That’s the 1st step in negotiating
In my job, we are advised not to say "no"; instead we were encouraged to use a different way of saying "no" and that comes the difficult part - getting choices that somewhat similar to the customer's preference. 😅
I’m obsessed with this man’s messages! Thank you!
You're welcome,thank you for being here 🧡
Al Pacino is good at negotiating)) sounds very much like him
Here’s my 2c on why Zoom meetings are worse. It’s not the visual information that’s missing. Instead it’s having 8 people (say) looking intensely at you and having to pay attention to all those with the same intensity. And not knowing if anyone is really looking at you. It provokes a lot of anxiety!!
IRL you know if someone is looking at you and you also know all people at the meeting are not expected to show such levels of intensity.
Last three questions: 1:29:32
aha moment to me, and also connect some dots along my journey, proves the oppsite is the way. i would implement motivate and genarate NO intead of Yes.
Glad this was helpful for you🧡
😂 I just walked into cvs and tried the I’m going to running your day because they didn’t have the meds and Uber customer needed - she what’s What!!!?? . I said in need this type of meds but you only have this on the shelves - she said ooh that’s nothing ran to the back and got it for me .. took her up then let her down with grace . 😂😂
Different things- when u negotiate under pressure it’s one tactic (it’s all about manipulation get result in a particular moment). When you negotiate for long term - you have to utilise sympathy and other side’s persons point of view (when you Agree on your terms that are both comfortable about - then long term productive relationships can start).
1+1=2 but sometimes 1+1=11
As for 1:13:00 and the "energy" you can perceive in-person but not over Zoom calls - There is research (and intuition) suggesting that aromatized chemical signals, including pheromones, can be perceived by humans (even more so by animals), allowing for us to sense many things without any visual, auditory or tactile cues. If you've ever been able to "smell" anger in another human (anger is probably the strongest emotion I can pick up via olfaction) or noticed that your cat/dog can tell what mood you're in without reading your face and body language, this idea might be more intuitive. My pets, who have their own bedroom and don't see me relax at night, can tell when I enter the alpha brain state, triggering them to become very disruptive in order to get my attention and steal it away from my flow (normally within seconds of achieving alpha state, impossible to be a coincidence). There is a lot of information in the air. There is also a study demonstrating that men and women can tell who of the opposite sex is fertile via pheromones.
Ppl lewrn to say NO 500,000 times before 7 yrs old??? So used to it. Love it. Make their NO be your desired answer😳 👏👏👏
A deep conversation between two men learned and profited much by deeply caring for others.
Interrupted the video to get a haircut; put the principles into action, and got the haircut free - without asking!!
What did you do to get the free haircut?
It always comes down HOW you ask
There is also a cultural element here. For example, when a Japanese buyer says “Yes”, it means Yes, I heard what you said. It doesn’t mean I agree with you! Irish people do not have words for yes or no in Gaelic. They say I did and I didn’t.
Bear in mind international cultural customs & ways of doing business.
Does that apply to insurance companies when a claim is in need of a payout?
I remember when I was a cashier in the men’s department, in my work they didn’t had sweater vests so I had to go to other stores. So customers started to ask me about my vests n where were they in the store, I said the truth, we do not have any sweater vests here. Manager’s offices heard about this, a week later we were selling sweater vests. Manager came around my area, and invited me to purchase from our own merchandise, I said, are you going to gift me a vest? If they see me wearing our merchandise they will fly away very soon. No, I was told. By that time, I already had enough sweater vests, colors, patterns etc. If men saw me wearing them somehow I provoked them. They didn’t wanted me to gift me one……lol….. I didn’t care, I had enough vests already, I was just trying to see if they would gift me one. I still have those vests…….. People would constantly asked me about my wardrobe, I do get much attention n I’m very good at selling, well used to be…….lol…...
What did you do to get the free haircut?
I think if you have a voice like Chris Voss you could negotiate your way out of or into anything! 😂
Do you know this Shark Tank episode Chris is talking about?
Would you Spend or dedicate the rest of your life in an idea
For which you would probably receive no material compensation for at least 20 years?
half way there!
❤❤
Thanks for being here!
Ok
🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
gruesome
No doubt great discussion and nice tips. #lewishowes
Thank you for showing love and your continued support 🧡
Awesome interview. Paraphrasing is key to listening and be open, and playful and people will thank you for it 🔥🙏🏽🦾😎
Thank you so much for watching! 🧡