dating a "quirky" girl
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ก.ค. 2024
- a video essay featuring my random thoughts after water Stargirl on Disney+, among other movies.
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thanks for watching everybody. Given current events, it felt weird to just sit here and make jokes about Disney Channel movies or whatever, so I wanted to do something a little more serious (but not too serious, I mean this is ME after all).
I don't do video essays too often, so some of you may have never seen one of mine. On TH-cam, most video essays are really just like fancy wikipedia articles or college thesis papers. But with mine I like to make them more personal, more about my experiences and opinions, rather than like "look at how many big words I can use".
In this video, I use the words "quirky" and "manic pixie dream girl" somewhat interchangeably. This is technically not correct, but I wanted to focus more on my experience with these kinds of people, rather than a dissertation about the trope itself and how it manifests in different kinds of media over time or whatever.
Like I mentioned in the video, I was REALLY into the idea of the MPDG back when I was in High School, so it was interesting for me to think back on why that was, and why I can't stand them now.
And again, as I touched on in the video, these roles of "sad boy" and "MPDG" can easily be reversed. But, at least in movies and tv shows, the trope is overwhelmingly portrayed in the way I talk about in the video.
The MPDG doesn't really exist in real life, but I have met more than a few girls (and guys too) who, either on purpose or by happenstance, are emulating one. I used to think dating these girls would be a dream come true.
I was wrong.
It was agony.
O shoot I’m first
second-
fourth
fifth
How was this commented a day ago?!?!
Pixie girl personality: lol i am so random
Main guy personality: sad boi
pretty much yeah
With the incel movement as the radical ( and dangerous ) spearhead of a pretty common phenomenon of a state of loneliness in young men and with an absence of relationships and a very high suicide rate for men ( th-cam.com/video/Q3WDw-DBKLA/w-d-xo.html ) ( en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_differences_in_suicide ) - the male part of this story is a pretty common character. Keep in mind, the examples I used are only the peak of a phenomenon that is pretty familiar in sociology and psychology alike. If I were to put this bluntly, many men are sad bois.
@Arcaryon Incel movement? Are you making this up or?
Ardian No, Incels are real
Why am I a mixture of both...?
A girlfriend isn’t a boy’s therapist. A boyfriend isn’t a girl’s patient. A relationship isn’t a case of poor mental health.
*A good relationship isn't a case of poor mental health.
Sounds like someone doesn't understand emotional support they partner when they struggling
RIGHT?? Like get a therapist dude
@@HetLedie No. A supportive SO is very different from a therapist. I have never seen, nor heard, of a relationship that could possibly be considered happy and healthy when one of them is the other's therapist. The one who plays as the therapist will only ever really feel like a therapist in the long run, and feel overburdened with the other partner constantly laying down ALL of their issues, big and small, on the therapist partner. Which is the antithisis of a healthy relationship.
A supportive partner is very different from a partner who acts as the other's therapist.
@@HetLedie There's a difference between providing needed support and being their therapist or trying to "fix" them.
why is every main girl character in a book is “not like other girls” and either extremely girly or a huge tom boy, people need to learn to be more creative
yea we need super girly girls that look like tomboys and tomboyish barbie looking girls !!
I wanna see the basic bully (wears pink, wears pearls, makeup, plastic, blonde, blue eyes, bully, probably has 3 other bully friends etc. you know the gist) become a main character
@@panigbrowardcollege yes and the plot shows us that she’s so mean because of tons of mental issues and traumas, and till the end of the movie she starts seeing a therapist who makes her feel better, she gets her shit together and gets rid of her shitty social behavior !
@@panigbrowardcollege Legally Blonde has the main character that’s a blonde- haired blue-eyed pink-wearing popular sorority girl. 🤷♀️
A lot of young girls are really into to the idea that they're inexplicably unique.
I feel like 500 days of summer is one of the most misinterpreted movies ever. The movie is not about a manic pixie dream girl, but about how Tom is viewing a three-dimensional person in a one-dimensional way. For example in one scene she is sharing very personal and vulnerable feelings with Tom and the narration is something like: “...and Tom knew he was the first person to hear this...” He’s not actually paying attention to anything she’s doing or saying, he’s just thinking something along the lines of: “Wow, I unlocked the backstory. I’m in for sure now!” It’s clear that Summer is a deeper and more complex character, and Tom barely pays attention to her. The problem is not with Summer, but with Tom. He chooses to view her the way he wants to. He’s not in love with her, he’s in love with the idea of her.
I think both are a problem as incompatible people who want to be compatible in some way. Summer being too open for an average relationship and Tom being too closed for a relationship with Summer.
It’s an anti-romcom that calls out the immaturity of the manic panic pixie dream girl trope and how romance movies and tv shows give people an unrealistic expectation of relationships. He thought Summer would make his boring life worth living and make him be a better person and pursue his dreams. His view was selfish and childish because it was one dimensional. He only begins to grow out of it once he decides to better his life for himself and not because of some girl that he’s infatuated witho
The film is about manic pixie dream girls. Exactly as you described, Tom makes her into a manic pixie dream girl, when really she’s a full human being. It shows the problems with the trope
well said and very interesting. i might have to watch that movie
This reminds me too much of ruby sparks
Edward: Say it
Bella: A vampire
Edward: What no, I'm just emo
Underrated comment
If Gerard Way got the role
LMAO
Ahahah this.
@@m.meghana2365 He actually was one of Smeyers top choices for edward (Henry Cavill also made the list) and MCR (vampcore) inspired the series, the production of twilight also asked them to write an original song for the trilogy and they said obviously no
I'm convinced that if twilight was less "sexually repressed conservative" and more "angry queer punk" that the band would have said yes
As a therapist I see a lot of women who are in a lot of terrible relationships cause they bought into the "fix the guy" fantasy
haha me
thats how you get into an abusive relationship
People are so surprised when they find out what others put up with, it’s so much harder to leave an abusive relationship
just like they wanted to fix their father (to love them unconditionally). And once again everything comes down to childhood and coping mechanisms. :/
@@dauser4 this! It's true, trust me. Wanting to believe that love is this all powerful thing. That it can fix him, if you fight hard enough and show him you love him despite his flaws, that will be enough to give him the strength to fix them. Its dark.
In real life:
Sad boy meets quirky girl, who likes adventure and likes living life.
The sad boy becomes a bit happier but in the process sucks al the life out of the girl, leaving her sitting in his room staring at the ceiling thinking of the person she once was.
It goes both ways, trust me.
White girls love adventure amirite
Yep
Happened to me but I’m better now
if someone else takes your identity from you, its up to you to get it back. dont be weak, u got this.
Literally EVERY.SINGLE.John Green novel.
Lol I was just thinking Margo Roth Spiegelman. Although I wouldn’t exactly consider Hazel Grace a mpdg. She’s like, depressed. Aza also clearly wasn’t perfect but Paper towns and looking for Alaska both seem like they fit into the category
I think he is using this trope but is subverting it. In paper towns when the protagonist finds margo she bashes him for fantasizing about how he finally found her and they could be together. If he had been looking at the situation without the rose-colored goggles he would have seen that see didn't want to be his pixie girl, she just wanted her enemies to die in a fire and he was a simp willing to help her.
@@ethanhunsaker9363 Yeah, I agree. From my understanding, Alaska is manic pixie, and Paper Towns interestingly seeks out to subvert that
@@selmaluvbees yeah as he showed in the video i think augustus was the ‘manic pixie dream boy’ (i use this term because i forgot what it’s actually called lol I hope you understand).
Lindsey Lee Wells is also not a mpdg.
*Wattpad novels have left the chat*
Niharika Newaskar I can so relate. I’m on watt pad and like- fr 😂👌🏻
there are Wattpad NOVELS too? shit
ary that’s the whole point of Wattpad....
ary After was a One Direction fanfic on Wattpad which was later published as an original novel after changing the character’s names and got turned into a movie. The Kissing Booth was also a Wattpad story that got published as a novel and got a Netflix adaption. And there’s plenty of other Wattpad stories which have been published as novels due to their insane popularity. Hardly any of them are actually well written though.
@@ary2766 Yes and he Hulu series Ligt As A Feather is also a wattpad book
The only manic pixie dream girl i will ever enjoy is Ellie from up.
Good catch I never thought of that.
Yep.
Omg is she one?! I never thought of that! Well UP is so good she doesn't count hahaha.
I forgot about her :0
She never was made to fix him so that’s why
The best example I know of a Manic Pixie Dream BOY isn't Edward Cullen, it's Jack from Titanic -- and his bubbly, charismatic self DOES change Rose, and then he disappears forever. Ya know, at the bottom of the ocean.
And if you want to imagine an alternative ending, there's Revolutionary Road XD
This comment is top tier
This is actually a really good point, ive never thought of titanic from this perspective, only from, damn, there was room for both of them on that door, dick move rose, dick move. Lol
No, but seriously, I definitely believe that you pinned it.
Thank you. I was thinking "no there are better examples"
this is it!
I want a manic pixie girl movie where she is the main character
Birds of prey?
Amelie? That movie with emily browning
Me before you
The series "The End of The F**king World" Isn't about the girl but she's the main focus of the story line and everyone refers to her as the main attraction. Over-all really great to watch
Juno ?
Imagine ever dating.
To unrealistic
What's dating?
Somebody knows?
.
.
.
Hello?
Daniel Isozaki
SIN
Yesterday my mom told me I can't date until I'm 21 😭
@@carolinemm9478 how old are you now?
this is literally every Wattpad book ever -- the girl is always super happy and quirky and ends up changing the " bad or sad boy "
Honestly the whole time I was watching this video I was thinking about that
But you can’t forget the lonely shy girl that needs to be saved
those are the straight wattpad stories
ash Teal heh
Summer Hold Or she gets a makeover and suddenly every man is fawning over her
I just realized, Your Lie In April is essentially the manic pixie dream girl trope, but taken to the next level, expanded upon, and actually done well
Maybe because Kaori isn't Kousei's sole source of happiness but piano or something
KstandsForPottassium Ooh, you have a valid point there
I think is because they really developed the character of Kaori and she is not only a random girl that wants to fix Kouseis life. She knew him and admire him since she was a little girl so it makes sense that she wanted to help him getting back to music. Also, they do show shes not perfect.
I cried so much watching that
Yeah I was thinking Your Lie In April was that way with Kaori. But I actually liked it.
Random girl: I’m not like other girls! I’m so quirky xoxoxoxox
Other girls: Same
And then the sad thing is if you TRULY aren’t like everyone else that comes with the price of being ignored or left out because no one likes you. Then everyone says stuff like that when they don’t know what it’s actually like
That just summed up the whole quirky girl culture
@@Peculiarpossum Same, it's not a gift. When you're not like other girls, you're not happy-go-lucky like this manic pixie dream girl (at least I'm not) you're not being seen as quirky, you're just weird. I do have a strong desire to help people (and animals too) though because I have a lot of empathy. Not just guys, women too. Fixing seems like the wrong word to use. You fix an object, not a person. I stay true to myself or I try to anyway. It's not easy in the world we live in. But unlike those girls in those movies I don't do whatever I want. I always consider how another person would feel. I try to mentally take a step back to look at my thoughts objectively. It doesn't always work, but I don't mind anyone else setting me straight. I actually welcome that and apologize whenever I'm wrong. I see that as a learning experience. My sense of logic often tends to be different than other people's logic too, so that makes for some awkward situations sometimes.
@@shanamoens822 that sounds so similar to me! Nice to know we aren’t the only “weirdos”💜
@@Peculiarpossum :) glad to know not all 'not like other girls' girls are toxic
Every time I see that trope of "I'm not like other girls", I automatically think of Syndrome from the Incredibles when he says "if everyone's special, no one is"
69 likes :)
Girls who say that are the basic ones
Or the twilight zone: if everyone is beautiful, no one is
Literally. There are so many 'quirky, im not like the others' girls that the basic girls are now special 🥶
That’s the “everything is nothing” logic, not necessarily true
quirky girls literally show their "quirkiness" by doing things *every other human being does*
Bruh I’m so quirky I eat and sleep
I trip on my over sized clothes 🙊
I’m so quirky I breathe
They cant theyre not like other girls
I’m so quirky, I have hands!
"she was not like other girls" who tf is like each other, everyone is different in some way or other
I know right. "Not like other girls" is pretty misogynistic.
@@youraveragestalker8438 how so? It doesn't insult all women, it just happens to trash on a group that believes they're special for doing/going through things every girl goes through. It's not misandrist to joke about incels right?
@@notisttt1240, I think in the "not like the other girls", it's thought that there are "normal girls", which are "unlikeable" (e.g. conforms to feminine standards!), unlike the "other girls".
You do not need to directly insult women to be misogynistic.
@@californium-2526 Noone said normal women are unlikeable. What we joke about is the hypocrisy behind "I'm not like other girls" when, yes, she is like other girls. It's like those people that put in their tinder bio "I like travel, food and dogs". It doesn't undermine average women, it undermines women that think they're better than others(which is not mysoginistic, as we mock those that think they're special all the time, from both genders)
@@notisttt1240 You clearly just don't get it imao.
at this point, the ‘other girls’ are the rarest types of people.
Yup lamo
This comment is underrated
other girls be like i am not like other girls i am rare
So what do you actually want to convey?
😂😂
How manic pixie dream girls should be portrayed:
Luna Lovegood
And Eve from Wall-E (but less quirky)
I like how Luna wasn’t created for the sole purpose of fixing someone tho hahaha
Yes ! Also I was your 469th like
YES
Waifu no cap
Ok but why is no one talking about the beautiful watercolor transitions
Yess I really love when it happens >< whoever makes the watercolor transitions are really amazing!👏🏼👏🏼
He's done them before with his Spider-man and 13 reasons why videos. Nonetheless i do really like this style and kind of wish he'd do more videos like this more often.
Just made a comment about it😂😂
Yeah they were really pretty!
tru
i hate when a female character‘s only purpose is fulfilling a male fantasy as if they’re not real people with desires and aspirations
I hate when a male character's only purpose is fulfilling a female fantasy as if they're not real people with desires and aspirations.
@@_BirdOfGoodOmen yep
@@_BirdOfGoodOmen Both are bad, but the former is incomparably more common in media throughout history as there are many times fewer stories about multi-faceted women.
@@joratto2833 Well put.
@@joratto2833 "Both are bad, but the former is incomparably more common in media throughout history"
lol, did you ever hear... well... almost the whole romcom / romance / teen drama genre? And did you ever wonder why young females are the target audience?
Both character tropes exist equally for their target audiences.
Stop trying to make another gender war out of it for the love of god.
Anime take this shit to a whole new level
A good exaple is your lie in april
its a manga but does oyasumi pun pun count?
no..
I do love your lie in April but it’s a perfect example
@@Paula-os7gq Love tht show
But it is a veryy good example
That anime movie I Want To Eat Your Pancreas has a pixie dream girl card too
Boys' method of escapism: manic pixie dream girl
Girls' method of escapism: brooding bad boy with a heart of gold
My uncle's method of escapism: 24 pack Coors Light and verbally abusive Facebook posts
WHERE'S MY JUUL? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂...I am at loss of words
lol, i'm a MPDG dating a BBBWAHAG. power couple
my method of escapism is weed and whisky
@@Anonymous-54545 for how long
@@mushipoo important question
and this is how the "i'm not like other girls" phenomenon began...
Nah. In manic pixie dream girl trope, the most focus is on phisical attractiveness of a girl judged by the sad boi.
Not like the other girls is probably "creepy silent kid" or "insane woman". You know, a character that is mostly hated for being different.
No.. that's the "Cool girl" kind a thing.
xxmessymindxx I thought the I’m NoT lIkE tHe OtHeR gIrLs and I’m So CrAzY aNd QuIrKy when there the most average person just annoying
@@arthurvickers4163 I have to agree with that. xD
I never understood and probably never will understand this whole " Im not like other girls" thing. Lmao
Just very weird overall
Leo in the movie: Absolutely nobody can know I exist
Leo in the book: *runs a show with his friend where they publicly humiliate people*
Omg Yes!
"Say it"
"Vampire"
"Wtf, no I just play a lot of World of Warcraft!"
This trope needs to die out. It’s setting unrealistic life expectations for both boys and girls.
No, finding “the one” won’t fix all your problems.
No, your relationship won’t just succeed on being “the one.” Uncertainty and impulsiveness won’t work in a good relationship.
Periodt😊
Who hurted you
It depends on how it's done. At the end of 500 Days of Summer, there isn't anything definite about the girl he met. Maybe she's the girl Tom marries;maybe she's just another step in Tom's journey. However, Tom is now testing dating out again and chasing jobs he actually wants rather than the crap at the greeting card company. Summer wasn't the "one" but still helped him in his life. It actually says that breaking up with people is not always the end of the world.
i think instead people need stop expecting movies to 100% portray real life all of the time and thinking that all ideas in movies translate into real life no matter what.
IMO That's the same thing as saying superhero movies should die out, you can't just put on a cape, train really hard and become a superhero. These movies are suppose to be a fantasy, a thing that while you watch it, pulls you away from reality so you don't have to think about your own life and you can just live in this fantasy for a while.
It's funny how I rely more on Alex for my movie reviews rather than Rotten tomatoes or anything else
Same
wow same here
Same
Alex and LME are the only movie reviewers i trust 😔👌🏽👌🏽
I don’t trust the other review platforms because they are so biased and pass judgement on something based off of if it fits the agenda they want it to fit.
Edward: say it
Bella: vampire
Edward: what do we eat?
**Taco bell ad comes in**
I used to be a manic pixie dream girl, unironically too. It's just who I was. But so many people broke that part of me, and I'm still picking up the pieces. I wasn't trying to fix people, I was just living and being happy. Don't find people like manic pixie dream girls to fix you or break them because you're angry, its cruel.
have you looked into neurodiversity? Because i thought i was just quirky but now im in the diagnosis prosess for adhd...
@@suides4810 yeah, I either have bipolar or adhd with other sprinkles.
Same here we got this slowly but surely remember what made you feel alive outside of them🩷
@@suides4810 yeah pretty much this. people think the quirkiness and weird stuff i do is because i'm soo random and funny but it's usually either stims or needing to regulate or just not getting some social cue. i'm not trying to be different, often the opposite is the case.
they also never want to see the actual weird part, it's only the climbing on trees and funny accidentally inappropriate jokes. but when the person they liked specifically for their non conformity turns out to genuinely be interested in niche weird things or god forbid, has problems connected to that, suddenly they're not interested any more.
"Lets take a look at Twilight"
nothing good has ever started with that sentence
True.
So TRUUEE
True lol
Edward: Are you afraid?
Bella: No.
Me: She's too stupid to be afraid of a vampire.
So many twilight fans would be so offended but, it's so true hahah
The thing about 500 Days of Summer is that Summer herself is NOT a manic pixie dream girl, but the idealization of her figure by Tom turns her into one.
i was looking for a comment like this, thank you! I kept thinking the same thing to myself. The point of the movie is that he sees her as he wants to see her, which is a manic pixie dream girl. That's not who she is tho, she's a person with thoughts and feelings, but he doesn't care about that as long as she just makes him feel "good". She's not there to make him a better person, if anything he becomes worse by showing his true colors. She's there for her own selfish reasons and doesn't actually want to be with him. His little sister even calls him out in the movie! When she rightfully leaves and married another man he finally pulls himself together and *fixes himself*. That's the whole point! You can't be with someone you build up in your imagination and expect them to be exactly how you imagine and also make you a better person. That's not how it works.
Ana Beatriz F. Thank you for this comment, I was looking for it! I think if anyone thinks Summer is a manic pixie dream girl then they don’t understand the movie.
They were never really a couple to begin with. The first half of the movie was Tom fantisizing about her and asking her out on a date
@@Stormy_Cloud and Summer even said in the beginning that she doesn't even want to be in a relationship. I mean, what she did was still wrong but Tom knew from the get go that what he wanted wasn't what SHE wanted but he still pushed for it
You might like "My Girlfriends Boyfriend" with Alyssa Milano. It's an interesting take on the manic pixie dream girl.
I still love 500 Days of Summer to death
Didn't expect to see you here
I would argue 500 days of summer is a deconstruction of the tropes
@@mojorecords172 it is
It's too good...i cried at the end 😅
you either stop chasing manic pixie dream girls or you live long enough to become one.
I love your comment
I always was one maybe because I'm autistic I always thought I can fix that sad girl...
"Boys Need to be fixed"
"Girls need a project"
I loved how you touched on this. I hate how women are expected to change a man or vice versa. A relationship is wonderful but it won't bring full on confidence. That's your job. This is a tiring trope in romance movies tbh.
And we all know that you cannot change somebody, unless they want you to.
Totally agree with this!!
And the other side of the coin:
Men are not something inherently broken that needs to be fixed. Men.Are.Not.Broken.
Women.Are.Not.Saviours.
Yes! They also love to do that in disney princess movies if you really think about it.
I kind of touched on this in a separate comment, but it's not so much an expectation as it is a power fantasy. They don't actually put any effort into the relationship, it's like their presence fixes everything on its own. That's why women are attracted to it. Putting any actual effort into changing a person, whether they're worth it or not, is a massive headache if actually attempted.
I don't think you should make this about yourself...
I swear to god Zoey Deschanel is that "quirky" girl in every single thing shes in lol
Yea kinda like nicholas cage in everything he does lol
Kinda like Edward Norton in everything he's in lol
New girl is a perfect example
Not in Elf
GrungyAssCinema That’s probably the only one
In Stargirl's defense, She was willing to compromise when she thought that acting normal would make her and Leo happier in the end. It was after acting normal and seeing that it changed nothing and just made her unhappy, she leaves Leo for her own good. Even when she acts like herself, many of the quirky things she does is for other people's sakes. That's why I think Stargirl is different than most Manic Pixie Girls because she doesn't act out of selfishness but actual love for other people.
I don't remember much, but when I read the book when I was younger it definitely made me cry.
In Breakfast at Tiffany's she was trashing her room in grief upon learning her brother died. It was misrepresented here 🤔
Breakfast at Tiffany's is so far from manic pixie. Not a good example at all.
Exactly. as ennui blue said, it wasn't her throwing some quirky tantrum. She was having a break down because she'd just found out that her brother, the only person she really cared for and the one she was prostituting herself out to someday make a home with, was dead. Holly is even more obviously broken in the novel, where she doesn't count "anything that happened before she was 13" among her list of lovers. She and her brother were running from an abusive home, and they found a...slightly better one, where they could stay, but then the doctor proposed and Holly (Lulamae) became a child bride. Likely thinking this was the only way to keep a roof over their heads. She's not so "random" because she's being true to herself. It's explicitly stated that she's a phony. She's re-inventing herself. Hiding from that abused child behind a thin veneer of sophistication and using men for what they seem to want from her. It's just that she'll never be able to run far enough to get away from herself.
@@symphonyhioco5093 Seriously. She's a manically broken girl, not a manic pixie dream girl trope, haha. Despite the romcom ending of the film in Breakfast at Tiffany's, the main character, Paul, actually does the opposite for Holly and helps her realize she's the one who is running away from herself and trying to find superficial happiness, instead of confronting her own problems.
I think the book is far better than a movie and really shows the manic pixie dream girl side of the story. I mean it starts by a rumor about a statue showing up in Africa or Australia that resembles Holly and the author going to the bar that they used to go to often to try to find out what happened to Holly. Capote was the kong of the manic pixie character trope
Thank you! And doesn't she sneak out of her apartment and crawl up to Paul's fire escape because there's a man literally beating down her door and she's trying to get away from him? Not to mention that Holly was supposed to represent the new "single girl in the city" of the 60's that was breaking tradition and living that single life to the fullest.
Audrey once said that her character of Holly Golightly was the hardest to play because it was nothing like her personal self
She played her well, though. And Holly had her redemption at the end
That movie was awful tho..
ChimChan nah, it wasn’t. Except Mickey Rooneys japanese character
that's a relief. i tried watching that movie and she just irritated me.
They should remake Breakfast At Tiffany’s based on the original novella. It was much darker.
The word 'quirky' has gotten so lame. It's like 'quirky'is a cheap excuse for annoying
MHA: *Cries in the corner*
Sheldon from Big Bang Theory
AGREED
Quirky seems to mean an attractive girl who is weird and unconventional. You see the same traits in characters who are not supposed to be attractive but they're presented as a weirdo outcast.
That's because you're jaded.
i remember reading stargirl as a kid, the fact that they're remained faithful to the book which was published 20 years ago has kind of resulted in stargirl's 'quirkiness' being even less effective. so many teens have ukuleles and wear colourful clothes now lmao
Yeah pretty much-
I own a Kalimba and I only use it at hone because I have a feeling that “Kalimba girl” will become the new “ukulele girl”
"Stargirl" was always a shit book, it was an obvious attempt by the author to show how deep and meaningful their writing was. Case-in-point: He didn't even write the actual name of the book on the cover, because he was too "unique "for that.
@@trianglemoebius
I disagree, I like the book. I like that stargirl is a real person, and that Leo is a real person. They changed each other in the book.
I've realized that a lot of my boyfriends first liked me because i fit the trope of "manic pixie dream girl" but I never liked that they didn't think of me too far past me being unpredictable or doing what I want. It's dehumanizing to do so because every relationship always ends with them claiming I'm not who I said I was or some bullshit like that, and it got to the point where I refuse to watch movies with that trope
I think a better example would have been “Jack” from Titanic. Rose doesn’t change Jack, but Jack is there only to fix Rose. On top of that he disappears...I mean. He dies.
Well he does mention a Fault In Our Stars which pretty much does the same thing.
they didn't let black people on the titanic
@@nerdycoolioh303 I have an idea. Let's go back in time and make them.
He said there are a few exceptions...but generally this is the shit movies cook
I hv to disagree. Rose has always been the type of girl who was unhappy being told wat to do/how to live. She had her life basically planned out for her. Jack just helped her gain the courage to break free/be herself
Side note: If she makes “other girls vs me” drawings, run for the hills
Unless it's fanart of Other Girl and Me Girl in a happy loving committed relationship, those are great 😁
Novur yes I love when they do those!
@@Novur ouuu yesss
😂😂
Why is everyone so against "I'm not like the other girls" thing? That's stupid. Most girls who think like that are victims of peer abuse or are just lonely and don't fit in.
Stuff like that, liking my difference from others, is what gave me strength to survive when I was a teen. I can only imagine how hard it is for girls like that now when apparently everyone hates them. Victim blaming at it's purest.
“Boys have to change, girls get to be themselves” interesting you should say that when in a lot of romcoms the often conventionally unattractive or awkward guy gets the pretty girl without having to change himself, meanwhile an “imperfect” girl, like prim and proper Sandy from Grease for example, has to change and become “hot” in order to win Danny over. Because he’s so perfect of course 😒
so then how do you feel about the trope where a gorgeous and good-hearted man sees the ugliest girl in the room and falls in love with her because he pities her, errr I mean, he sees her true self underneath and she teaches him that beauty isn't skin deep...
To be fair, a running theme in Grease is that Danny was shallow. Remember "Summer Loving"?
Danny changes in Grease as well, he tries to clean up his act and joins the school track team
@@ohifonlyx33 what? can you give some examples of this trope? feels like you just made it up
@@jeanivanjohnson Michael loved Mia in prince diaries before her makeover...
I dated a M.P.D.G. for 5 months when I was 21. It was a whirlwind that definitely changed me for the better. She broke my heart when she moved on to the next guy. It's been 10 years now she's an exotic dancer and married to a man with numerous face tattoos.
Moved on to next guy? Jajaj
I wanna meet Alex in real life😂😂. Imagine discussing or having a movie Night with him. It would be amusing
While looking into his blue eyes
@@ksway8471 woah. Stop right there
Honestly sometimes i forget that alex isn't a white animated cartoon character who has a dog.
@@ksway8471 Okay... Getting darker
@@rosecharm3252 blue eyes are often not that dark, it's usually just the shading
There’s always movies that have this exact plot: Shy girl moves to a new school. On her first day, she makes two new friends (one boy who clearly likes her, one girl) and they become besties. The new girl ends up developing a crush on the popular girl’s bf and the bf is kinda into her (which pisses the popular girl off.) The popular girl’s bf gets mad that she’s jealous and breaks up with her. The shy girl and popular guy end up dating and the shy girl gets popular by default. She gets caught up in the popularity and ditches her friends. She later realizes she made a mistake, breaks up with her bf and goes back to her friends. They take her back and her boy best friend confesses his feelings and they become a thing. The friend group continues to thrive and they lived happily ever after
so, Mean Girls? [without the boy best friend( Damien) crushing on her]
Isn't that the plot of radio rebel?
Or where the popular boy(the mean girls crush) and the punk/outsider boy fight for the new girls love
I've definitely recognize _that_ story lmao. Classic.
Tall girl
“Manic pixie dream girl”
Shows neurological girl who’s just quirky...
I think romantic relationships should be like platonic relationships. Just two people who love each other and validate and support each other. A healthy relationship should go both ways as far as support and understanding goes. It’s not fixing each other, it’s just helping each other when the other person asks for help.
I'm not going to lie, I'm really happy to see him doing this type of content again
same! He's so good at it and I love the editing style he uses
Again?
Elisa van den Berg somebody’s new here
Indeed!
Yeah the constant reviews can get a little exhausting since this is what I subscribed for. That being said tho I always prefer a creator making what THEY want.
I genuinely like this format, the more serious and analytical tone is actually pretty refreshing. The editing is really interesting as well.
Was about to comment the same
I totally agree! His comedy and analytical tone is spot on- it’s so refreshing
agreed!!
Check out his earlier post. He originally started with this format. Recommended 👍
I agree!! 😁
I appreciated you looking at an example of a fantasy boy and pointing out how in those stories it's still that the girl fixes the boy.
hey alex, do make more video essays. they're so insightful and informative, i absolutely love it.
Wearing hoodies isn't a personality trait 😜
🐝🎻🤟🤟
I feel personally attacked by this comment. I am one with the hoodie
It is if you're a teenager
neither is eating pizza and chicken nuggets- that's just like a non-lying human...
But it sure is comfortable 😜
When you’re both the sad boy and the manic pixie dream girl
Mood
Bipolar vibes 😍🥰✨
Mood
when you're bipolar and no one ever wants you
@@tree6814 for good reason
Alex, I am about 8 minutes into the video right now, and I just wanted to say that I am so appreciative of the amount of thought (and most likely time) that you put into this video. Although it's sort of on a different path than most of your videos, and doesn't feature your great great animation skills, it really already is one of my favourite videos of yours.
Shit i just now realized this is the crap i was doing in high school (being the “quirky” girl or manic pixie person without even trying) until watching this video because this was literally how i was acting towards guys i had a deep connection with or liked without even realizing it and it made me laugh because it’s just wow, it’s not my job to fix someone when i was broken and ostracize myself.
we're often our own worst enemies, even if we just can't see it, and certainly no one is a perfect representation of a trope, cause that's just a concept, but we can certainly reflect aspects of it. i've always been a "sad boy" and see now more than ever how stupid i always was expecting some girl to come save me, sometimes i think no one's ready for love until they reach their 30's lol
The idea that a girl HAS to fix a boy is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. No person NEEDS fixing by someone else and no one should have to fix someone else.
Plenty of people need fixing, and a lot can't do it on their own.
The problem is movies apparently can't be made without a romance plotline, so the guide/helper role is merged into the romantic interest role.
My own hypothesis is that it's a couple of different layers
Layer 1 is that often, by being the fixer-upper in a person's life, you're automatically on a different pedestal; you're more special than the rest of the people in that person's life, and feeling special and feeling needed often feel interchangeable to many who haven't yet felt a difference
Layer 2 is that often, guys get to act out their more negative behaviours with less of an impact to their own value; as such, every guy around you seems like a not-so-great SO; the fantasy then becomes that hey, maybe he's an a-hole to everyone else, but amazing to me! Or that, even if he has these red flags, I know that his heart is good, and he must be behaving negatively for a reason. If I can just fix those reasons, we'll have a decent guy on our hands! Which is like, what never happens and why it's such a staple in fiction, but combine the fantasy of being special and having a decent partner if you just make enough effort, if you just dig deep enough, and it's one hell of a potent combination, and even better, is whole-heartedly backed by mainstream society
Don't therapist help to fix people?
Doctor Corgi yh but that’s different, being a therapist is a career path. Now I’m not saying people shouldn’t help out their friends or significant others, like yh talking it out and comforting each other is a good thing from time to time. However, it should not lead to co-dependency because in a healthy relationship, both people will compromise with each other and then go off and take care of their own responsibilities while having support for one another. It’s really important to have faith in yourself in order to have faith in the relationship. And that goes to any type of relationship
@@its_just_me6183 I agree, and couldn'thave said it better. What I was trying to imply(but I'm terrible when it comes to talking) is that people exist to help you. You shouldn't rely on you significant other(or whoever) to do so, and you shouldn't have to fix people. However you should listen to them, and try to persuade them to get help by talking to a therapist.
The manic pixie dream girl and her counterpart, the depressive goblin nightmare boy
😂
Laughed so hard 😂
G O B L I N B O Y
i’m using this
Mpdg and dgnm
This was honestly really good analysis of the MPDG trope. I've seen a handful of videos talking about it, but you really put it in perspective with the role reversal segment. And it was cool seeing you dissect the main characteristics and show they aren't realistic ways of operating.
I've watched a ton of videos about this topic, but I think this is my favorite. Well done!
When I was dating a guy I wanted to “help” and “fix” because he was broody, sad, and mean my mom told me it was most often that people would never change. She asked me if I could live with all the things I didn’t like if he didn’t change. The answer was no so I moved on. Best advice I’ve every received
your mom is right, we shouldn't expect to be able to change anyone
Sis same, never been happier
We as men don't like when women try to change us he has to be motivated if he isn't leave it alone
@@kylelindsay6390 I'd phrase it that we don't want to "be changed" we want to be "Inspired to change"
Wow u r selfish 😂
I just realised that "The Bridge to Terabithia" is exactly this.
Oh no. Why did you do that
But instead the girl dies-
Ash - that fits the theme of "disappearing suddenly", though.
True.
@@SooyeonIdle I cried for sooooo long after this
This gives me another reason why, I love Breakfast at Tiffany's so much. The speech Paul gave her at the end gave me chills.
I completely agree with you! I appreciate that you talked about it from the guys prospective, cause a lot of people just don't. You did a great job handling both sides. And I loved the watercolor transitions.
Another really great example of this is John Green’s “Paper Towns”.
Q projected that onto her. He loved the idea of her, not for who she really was.
Alaska
John Green books tend to be more deconstructions of the MPDG tropes. Some are more successful at this than others.
Omg i always thought it was “Paper Town” i feel dumber-
I feel like I never even understood Margo. Always saw her through Quintins eyes and his assumptions about her.
This trope:
Makes it seem the only way you can change is if you have a woman in your life
Women are only there to help men
It some how ends up being sexist to both sexes.
ugh thank you.
Because a relationship with a girl and to care for her/help her with her daily struggle is understood as a way to compensate for a lack of responsibility (=meaning) in your life. But that's not how it works.
Maybe even homophobic if we think about it
@@Lola-yh2su in what way is it homophobic?
@@tinyxgremlin well, it's maybe not 'homophobic' as we think of it, but it is heteronormative in a way. If life for men was really solved entirely by the women if their lives, gay men in that case would never change for the better. On the other hand, if women only exist to help men, lesbians existence itself is questionable as being 'fulfilled.' Anyway, the whole idea of manic pixie dream girls is bullshit so pay it no mind.
This is actually the best video I've watched that talks about this kind of topic. Really well done.
this video was so well done, like I can imagine the hard work he put into it!
If you want to see a real manic pixie dream boy, hallmark movies are your best bet.
Everything on that channel is as cookie cutter as they come
@@elmackattack1992 like when calls the heart
The perfect single father whose wife is out of the picture and he has a perfect big house in a quaint small town. That's pretty much every Hallmark perfect guy.
So true
I can guess the ending of every movie on that channel from the introduction
The thing about "500 Days of Summer" I will say is that they do subvert your expectations and reveal that Joseph Gordon Levitts character was putting her on a pedestal and falling for his fantasy of her rather than for her. Still the same concept but the way they did it was better than how most go.
Exaclty.
Yeah she wasn't a manic Pixie
Nathan Rabin the guy who came up with the trope wrote an article where he was pissed of that people said Annie hall or summer are manic pixie dream girls
He put her on pedestal and she wanted the pedestal and played him like a flute, cause doesn't want to be alone at the moment. He saw only what he wanted and she didn't care beyond it was nice for now. He should have listened more and she should have told him to go away.
This was the first one where they really told you the guy was wrong and this girl is not at all what she seems.
This is a great video! I love how you put it togeather. Things I never thought about those characters.
Dang this is the first video of Alex's I've seen. It's funny because it's so extremely different from almost every other video he does. I watched this about a week after it came out, and ever since I've been hooked on his content. I completely forgot this was my first impression of him. This video is so darn good I'm watching it again.
I'm a girl and honestly, I wouldn't want to base my whole relationship on having to "fix" the other person either.
Same tho but me as a person I will probably fall for that type of a relationship because I love helping people and if I can’t fix those closest to me I feel useless and not needed anymore.
I'm a guy and think the same way.
@@bhavanabharath5192 Just fyi, and this is some proven-to-work personal advice - the best way to help a guy out a lot of times is to yell at him about his shitty behaviour. If you have an actual reason to do so, it gets fun after a while. Lol great way to let off steam.
@@bhavanabharath5192 And that's a bad mindset. I deal with it aswell. I feel like I have a responsibility to help people out, but you *don't* . They can only change if they show a desire to change. You'll only hurt yourself if you go for people who don't.
Seriously! I fell in love with my husband as he was. I knew him before we got together and I won’t change him. He’s a good guy, not a perfect one.
I like the idea of a bubbly, happy girl as a CHARACTER. I think it's ruined when it gets tied to the story of a man.
Luna Lovegood is like that in Harry Potter. Def. one of my favourite characters in thee series!
Even when she's the main character, it always seems like the girl is just a side character to the guy's story and is just constantly getting dragged around.
@@melharis4451 when did you see manic pixie dream girl as main character tho? or manic pixie dream person for that matter
Actually, part of this specific trope is being a man's dream, as the name says. The character wouldn't be a manic pixie dream girl if she wasn't attached to a man. She would be something different. Luna Lovegood is something different.
You can find female protagonists who are quirky. And as the story is about them, we can see the flaws beneath the quirkiness, or how they use this kind of personality to mask their insecurities. Juno from "Juno" might be one of those. Or Molly from "Uptown Girls."
i had to constantly check if this was really alex cuz the editing style is so... different and i'm kinda loving it
It does make sense to me to imagine the Manic Pixie Dream Girl as representing a part of the male protagonist that he has repressed, thus becoming depressed, and the movie being about him reforming an adult relationship with his carefree, childish, impulsive side. All characters don't need to be fully fledged out - sometimes they only represent an aspect of the main character, just as in a dream every person you meet is yourself in a certain guise.
“I lOvE hEr KnEeS”
haha. i never understood that. especially in drawings nowadays they make the girl's nose, knees and elbows pink like ..oookaay
*L E T S C U T IT O F F*
So weird
AIRIDER skateboarding *Y E S*
@@nicole-wf4pe That's usually a stylistic choice because knees can be reddish or slightly tanned.
I see this girl fix boy thing as an attack on both men and women.
no it isn't gtfo
@@irene5298 yeah. it is
BlueJam76 no it isn’t male dafuq 😂😂
Alexa
It is an attack on males
Because it’s saying that guys absolutely need a girl to fix them. That they won’t be anything without a girl in their life
Are you really that ignorant?
@@irene5298 ^
l
Bridge to terabithia...
This was really well put together, thank you!
I have a friend that is very close to being a MPDG, at least on the surface. She's bold, she says and does what she wants, she's beautiful, and she's a little bit weird. I'll tell you what happened when a MPDG stayed with the man she inspired.
Everything was great, he fell for her instantly, she was super excited because it felt like they just clicked. But after a bit, things started getting bad. She has an aura about her that attracts people to her, and shes beautiful, so whenever they went out other guys would look at her or hit on her. The guy, who started off insecure, became more and more jealous, despite her never engaging with the other men. Over time, he stopped taking her out because he would get too jealous. He would go out to drink while he made her stay at home. He became possessive and controlling. Slowly he started to tear her down.
The clothes that he liked before, the ones that made her 'different,' instead made her look like a boy, he said. The random noises and gestures that were just a part of who she was, suddenly made her 'immature.' While he used to lovingly stare at her at dinner, now he said that the way she eats is ugly. She would sing when she was happy, but now it was annoying. Every little thing she did was something to critique, and slowly she began to wilt like a neglected bird in a cage.
What you don't see in a MPDG is that while they seem confident on the outside, some times the inside can be pretty sad. After two years of systematic abuse, we were finally able to pull her away from him, but she was with him for so long that by the time we got her out she was a shell of who she had been.
It took months to get her to genuinely laugh again. Months for her to recover her sense of individuality and self worth. Months before she would stop apologizing to me just for eating.
Now she is back, back to being her normally abnormal self, and she is wiser now. But that's just a hint of what could happen if a MPDG stays with the guy she fixes or inspires.
This was me... I experienced all of this, for only two years. But it has shaped my whole adult life. I've decided that it was hard, but a growing experience. Still hurts sometimes to think about. The age from 17 to 19 changed everything. Now I'm 30, and I'm basically who I always wanted to be, but it took so much work to get here. From quirky, to childish, to mature, to broken, to selfless, to self involved, and now, I have balance. It was incredibly hard, and sometimes it still hurts, but now, I'm not a MPDG, I'm just... Me. And I love me. 😊
Now thats a plot for a movie if i've ever seen one!
You talking about a real person as a movie trope though... Calling her a MPDG or drawing a parallel between her and a movie trope limits her as a person and dismisses her genuine character that's weird, fun and free-spirited. Real people are not tropes. We are more complex than a few hundred pages describing a simplified version of a real human by script writers. Zoey Deschanel herself was dubbed a MPDG even though she's a real person and all we see about her comes down to 10 minutes of edited talk show interviews. That's a no from me.
Same freaking thing, except looking the MPDG part. One day you inspire them, the next they hate everything you are. Sorry that your friend experienced that
this is exactly what i thought would happen in that scenario, i’m so sorry that happened to her and the fellow comments stories ❤️ glad your safe
Manic pixie dream girl in other films: *Leaves the story because in breaks or has to move out*
The bridge of Terabithia: Haha, pixie girl goes *splash*
Thanks for reminding me of this emotional disaster..
This comment makes me want to laugh and cry at the same time.
s p l o o s h
I was about to point this out lol But damn, that did emotionally destroy me tho
Duuude 😭🤧😂
this video is great! please do more of these videos!
This really affected me to my core... Please make more of these
except that in 500 Days of Summer, it was Tom's fault, and Summer was not a mpdg. He just treated her like one, completely disregarding her, not listening to her and just fantasizing and projecting his wishes onto her. 500 Days of Summer is a movie that tries to break the mpdg trope...
she did lead him on a bit, didn't look for a relationship, yet did things you do in one... uh huh... I don't blame him
@@ryderwilson7955 Women don't owe men anything. Tom was in the wrong in the movie
Yeah it's like a deconstruction of manic pixie dream girl trope
Pepino Corino both of them was at fault. Because she did lead him on like persisting him to sleep with her e.g shower sex. This is while her being full aware that he likes her. But at the same time, she made it clear to him that she doesn't want commitments. He set himself on a trap, he didn't think this through😃
I think his video was centering around as he said that no one should aspire to be a mpdg or the guy because either position is dangerous
imagine if quirky bad written male characters where as hated as female quirky characters, like the abomination that is jughead from riverdale
iF yOu HaVen'T nOTiCeD, iM wEird, Im A WEiRDO, i dOnT FiT iN, I DoNT wANNa FiT iN
There aren't quirky men, they're just self proclaimed assholes who'd say stuff like "That's who I am, I'm an asshole, I've warned you"
They ARE as hated though?? Why else do we not have as much quirky male characters as quirky female characters? Because they are less popular than the quirky female characters.
Angelina Liguori I think they are more hated or disliked! Quirky girls seem fun, the guy is usually cute and sad, but humble.
I think they are not AS hated because most of them are accompanied by the most disgustingly stupid "would not ever exist as a sane human being" girls and they get all the hate for putting up with those guys.
Love this style of video! Never watched your content before but deffo subscribing! Well written, beautifully illustrated. Well done :D
You should really do more of these, very interesting!
I’ve actually been in “relationships” where the guy projects me to be a manic pixie girl. It gets to a point where you feel less like a person and more like this idealized object that belongs to someone because they say they “need” you or that you’re different and spontaneous. And you don’t wanna breakup with them because you start to think that it wouldn’t be fair to THEM. I think that’s why the manic pixie girl shouldn’t be something people romanticize because most of the time both people in the relationship are just looking for some type of validation in their on way and they both end up unhappy.
I couldn’t agree more !!! I happened to live the same thing and yes it becomes unbearable to even think of breaking up with them, because it would be too mean to them.
Same!
I wish I had a coin for every time a guy has told me "you're not like other girls". Glad some of them didn't idealize me and actually wanted to know my personality too!
Dude me too!! I had a good friend of mine who had a huge crush on me. He would say things along the lines of “oh you’re not like other girls cause you don’t wear makeup” and “I’m so glad I have you in my life, you make me so happy” like I’m honored but I want him to see me as a friend. I think my relationship with him helped him become more confident and happier in life but I don’t want him to see me as a manic pixie dream girl, maybe a “manic pixie dream friend” lmao because I feel like I’m an object. Now that I’ve made it clear, I don’t want to be with him, he dropped me like a hot potato.
I went through something similar with a guy I dated for 3 months...it’s a lil sad but he’s still open to a relationship with me and it’s been 2 years 😩 he’s a nice guy though, just didn’t actually understand ME.
So it’s kind of like a boy gets a sun and a girl gets some clay. The sun gives warmth and light to the boy just by existing. The boy gets an opportunity to grow as the sun provides life to them. The clay gives the girl an opportunity to mold something into what’s perfect for them, fixing the original shape’s mistakes. That’s kind of the analogy I was thinking of lol.
Also if you look at the sun too long you’ll get burned, as the sun is not mindful of the pain it can cause. The clay would be completely dependent on its creator, as it’s entire identity is defined by a fantasy.
Edit: Had another thought so I wanted to share lol. Another thing is that this shoves unbridled expectations onto both parties: that one is expected to be a constant source of comfort over being a human being, and another is expected to change their personality and identity based on someone else’s preferences. The boy is consistently unsatisfied as their partner can’t hold up to the expectation that they should only exist to make the boy happy, and the girl is left with nothing as their partner becomes just a shell of a human being.
Now that is some deep stuff man.
Sounds similar to Icarus
Vlad 117 I love a good metaphor lol
Mistakes are subjective to ones beliefs. Maybe the guy is fine and in our society girls go with the bad boys often cause they think they’re different and that they can fix him.
What a beautiful analogy
For some reason I have the very specific and somewhat similar type of “Cute, pale, funny, young women with natural but uncommon hair colors, and names starting with the letter A” which fits the profile of every girl I’ve ever liked/dated.
I mean there's nothing wrong with having a type, only if it inhibits you from dating someone out that box that you developed feelings for.
great analysis I loved it!
"Holding hands in Ikea." I bet that's supposed to be serious, but I died.
Me too but I mean yeah you can hold your friend's hand in Ikea but😅
Let me take a Jörmungandr at that yeah friends hold hands sometimes 🤣
I really liked the editing and transitions you did on this video.
The editing on this video is phenomenal.