14 Reasons WHY Monkey Branching Relationships ALWAYS FAIL!
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 6 ก.ย. 2024
- In short, Monkey branching is cheating and leaving with the new person.
It refers to the behavior where someone in a relationship starts looking for a new partner while still being in their current relationship, transitioning to the new partner before fully ending the current relationship.
Here are several reasons why monkey branching relationships will ALWAYS fail:
1:26 1. Bypassing the grief process
2:50 2. Commitment Phobia
- Fear of Long-term Commitment: Individuals who monkey branch have a fear of commitment, making it difficult for them to sustain any relationship long-term.
- Avoidance of Intimacy: They might avoid true intimacy, preferring the excitement of new relationships over the work required to maintain a long-term partnership.
3:42 3. Communication Problems
- Poor Communication Skills: Those who engage in monkey branching did not have developed strong communication skills, relying instead on escape and avoidance rather than addressing issues within the relationship.
- Conflict Avoidance: Avoiding conflicts and not dealing with problems in the current relationship will lead to unresolved issues being carried into the new relationship.
5:14 4. Emotional Dependence
- Need for Constant Validation: Individuals who monkey branch will be dependent on external validation and the excitement of a new relationship, which is unsustainable in the long run.
- Lack of Independence: They struggle with being alone, leading to a pattern of seeking relationships not out of love but out of a fear of being alone.
7:01 5. Getting into a relationship before getting to know the partner
7:56 6. Impact on Future Relationships
- Cyclical Behavior: The habit of monkey branching can become a cyclical pattern, making it difficult for the individual to break free and develop healthy, stable relationships.
9:24 7. Social and Ethical Consequences
- Reputation Damage: Constantly jumping from one relationship to another will harm an individual's reputation and social standing, leading to social isolation or judgment from peers.
- Ethical Considerations: The ethical implications of hurting others by not ending relationships properly can weigh heavily on one's conscience, affecting mental and emotional well-being.
10:13 8. Psychological Effects
- Mental Health Impact: The stress of juggling multiple relationships or the anxiety of being caught can have detrimental effects on mental health.
10:53 9. Lack of Genuine Connection
- Superficial Relationships: Relationships initiated through monkey branching might lack depth and genuine connection, as they are often based on physical attraction or the excitement of something new rather than a deep, emotional bond.
11:28 10. Emotional Unavailability
11:40 11. Unresolved Issues
- Repeating Patterns: The issues that led to dissatisfaction in the previous relationship are likely to come back if they are not addressed. Without personal growth and self-reflection, these problems will resurface in the new relationship.
11:53 12. Psychological displacement
This could be things like:
- moving in together fast
-going on vacation
- post pictures on social media
- Introducing them to the family
12:26 13. Too many expectations of the relationship (getting married…)
12:53 14. Lack of Trust
13:35 In conclusion, monkey branching relationships will ALWYAS fail due to a combination of trust issues, emotional unavailability, poor communication skills, and unresolved personal issues. These factors create a shaky foundation that makes it impossible to build a stable, healthy, and lasting relationship.
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Not only did they monkey branch but intentionally tried to take their guilt out on me online by smearing my name and trying to get me to react. I couldn’t understand why she was so mad at me when she broke up with me and was cheating and left me for that person. I also saw them a year later out and saw how skinny they looked. Looked like depression to me
Yo same! With her for 6 years.. share a kid .. she got SOO skinny and always looks miserable
Going thru that right now
This is a behavior pattern of people with Borderline Personality Disorder
Same happened to me after 10 years
@@matthewkeim mine got skinny as well. i met her when she was curvy. theyre looking for the next sucker is why.
we simply dodge a bullet thank God
This video is right on time. It is EXACTLY what I have been going through the last 4 months. Everything you are explaining sounds like my anxious ex, and now it’s the breadcrumbs, which is even worse. I have to temper my own anger, hurt, and grief with compassion towards her and her mental challenges.
Currently living through this 😞 my heart is broken I miss my husband so much.💔
It gets better....just put it in JESUS hands. I missed my wife but now I realize she wasn't the one for me. God has someone better for me. Have faith.
I'm so sorry 😔 I am going through the same thing currently and I am destroyed and I miss my husband also 💔
If they left you .. they never truly loved you
You're not alone. I'm struggling with this as well.
@ricardocamara1602 probably don't even know whatlive is.... limerence = chasing the butterflies
Girl here, my ex monkey branched co-worker we both knew. We've been 10 years together. I thought he was my forever man but never asked me to marry, red flag. I wish I knew this back then. He was my best friend, I thought. He made her pregnant while still living with me and dared to invite her to my apartment to show off 🤯 to be honest I don't know for how long he was 'cleaning her chimney' but it's no longer my concern. It happened in 2021.What type of a man he is to do something like this and last day he sees you and tell you that he did it as revenge because I was talking to other man and couldn't come back to our home country and used my insecurities against me. 😔 This was like being hit by a train. He still lives with that woman so don't tell me those relationships always fail. I wanted to end myself, people were saying that time heals so I thought I was healed from it but after 2 years I met someone new and after this discard whole trauma came back doublepowered and it was one time too much. Something died inside me but I ended up in recovery (not for substances use). So one benefit of those two experiences is I'm seriously healing now🙏 Thanks for this video anyway.
I was never rich but was just used and replaced. And he gave me false hope before the ghosting
My ex monkey branched me with a coworker and moved him in quickly. She will be his KARMA when he realizes she is a narcissist, she will ruin him !
8 years has gone by since my ex husband cheated and left me and he STILL hasn’t spoken to me not even about our children. GUILT.
Thumbs up 👍 your information is good and your heart is in the right place. I’ve been monkey branched 3 times. I think this is just the default way women break up.
They constantly have men around they are talking to but the moment you’re no longer her best perceived option becomes the moment she starts swinging
Just thought I’d update, after almost 3 weeks mine reached out asking if I was free to chat and wishing me happy birthday for my birthday yet to come. I just ‘liked’ her comment.
@@nicholasbrajkovic1710 I wouldn’t have even done that
@@TheMchyaby haha
@@nicholasbrajkovic1710how are you keeping bud?
I wanted her so bad. Now that I'm trying to move on. She comes back, after things didn't work out with her new dude. Idk how to feel. I want my family back but I can't stop thinking what she was doing behind my back.
Updates ?
Did you go to her now? Remember she put you as a backup plan.. whn she brokeup with you behind you she was enjoying sleeping with someone else while he was just for sex with her nothing serious and she relaize that she lost a loyal and responsible man like you. Dont take her back bro
Trust me once a cheater always a cheater. It’s a character flaw. If you take her back she will cheat again! th-cam.com/video/9rf35fXD7bo/w-d-xo.htmlsi=_ZF6x0ZosKMlK9-x
My ex and his monkey branch are still together 8 yrs later. She left her fiancé for my ex, she is half his age. I bet it’s lasting because neither wants communication, or emotional support, closeness. She is so young she probably don’t know what a healthy relationship is. They do look happy, cuz it’s all fun, and avoid the tough stuff.
It can be possible that they fall in love with someone more compatible surely
Man point 13. Too many expectations... really sounds fu..ed up. That's the most unhealthy thing.
Your videos on monkey branching are incredibly detailed! Thank you Paz!!
I think you have just described a rebound relationship. Not monkey branching.
My ex FA monkey branched to another after a four-year mostly good relationship with me. He wanted to " see where it goes " and be friends with me at the same time. Nope. I let him go without tears or drama. NC forever for me. I am mostly secure with a few avoidance tendencies myself. I like my space; once a week is enough for me. I kept my own.life, family, and friends. The new love possibly has emotional problems and was aided by her family from what he told me. I wish him well. Nine months later, I am healing very well, and moving on. Much happier now. I do watch these videos since they are educational and helpful.
The video that I needed. Thank you Paz. You're the best !
Mine monkey branched to a co worker. They been together a year now. Guess some do work
just soooo helpful❤
🤍
i quietly sit back and watch the ex get wrecked becuase we were married 15 years, she discarded, went hot/cold for the last 6 months only to find out she was seeing another man already-whom she introduced to the grandkids 1 month into her rebound..meanwhile i spend time healing myself and not about to get back with her-that train wreck will impressive
My fiance monkey branch on me and to be honest since she left doors as been opening for me am more happy than sad tbh them leaving can sometimes be a blessings
Broke up 7 months ago, now she’s dating the guy she was talking to during the relationship. Lived together for 4 years and raised 2 kids together. Is that still considered monkey branching?
It’s monkey branching.
Hello Paz coach you are unique....I need your opinion... my ex was married for 20 years.... the process for his divorce lasted one and a half year . they haven't completely separated,the houses,cars and companies they own together.... We were together for 5 months... she found out about us and she became more cruel...she ruined in a way our chemistry....we were in love ❤️ but she made it difficult for us because she started blackmailing him for this and that...he had too much to deal with he got crazy and he told me we should break up ...he also told me he will return back to his wife...she was still working as an employee at one of his companies...2 possibilities are here.... either I was the rebound snd he never got over her or I was the real relationship and his ex wife is 9:24 the monkey branching ..😮
Please tell me your opinion... thank you.. kisses from Greece..
She known her monkey branched for 10 years they been together 5 month and now introduced my kids to him … I’m trying to get her back I was in a rut she got scared never talked about it she avoids feelings always have 12 years of no talking about them , it’s never bothered me until she didn’t tell me when something was wrong, she would never of strayed if I was at my best we have kids as I say and I won’t leave family so I hope this ends tbh, I’m not treating her any different than I did this doesn’t bother me really what does bother me is the thought of losing her and the family, I speak to her every day because iv got kids she still has feelings for me iv never treat her badly but I didn’t treat her right either but she has seen my changes that’s all I can do and she said iv changed everything I needed to, she isn’t toxic I see nothing wrong with her personality rather than speaking she ran, but I won’t become in that rut again and I know we can be happy for years to come, better your self so they want to come back they ran from the old you just become better than your old self I’m hoping that gets me the end goal of family back together if not then my changes will have to be for the next woman but I’m hoping it doesn’t come to that, I have no anger towards her never have even when I found messages asked how she was feeling you have to put your self in their shoes it’s not easy to run from your kids and family it took guts to do that then moving out in her own place and taking the kids, I just hope she realises the grass isn’t greener my love is real for her and the kids and iv changed massively since she didn’t talk about feelings nor did I 😂
Bro she has gone to another man. That shit ends directly. Good luck with it. The only reason to accept a woman back is if you pushed her out because of violence or fights and stuf. Then you can make it maybe good after some time. But when she monkey branches to another guy , its done.
How come they seem so happy and moving fast meeting the family and traveling all the things they never did with me. Maybe some monkey branch relationships work
I think some relationships do end up working out
@@SNEAKVS I know for fact they don’t…
@@PazGoldmanOfficialI wish.. my ex and her guy (ex friend) seem to be living life and look super happy together 7 months so far
I went through this just 2 weeks back on my birthday of all the days she could pick, after being together for 2 years she left me for someone else, "left me" is an understatement, she discarded me with not remorse, she told me she was pregnant by the new guy and that she was never really in it with me, you would swear I did her wrong but all I've ever did was love and be there for her, whats worse is she tried to guilty trip me as though i was the one at fault, im hurt but ima take my time to heal.
Mine done that after 10 years and 2 kids. They are all the same
@@callofdutybloginfoIt’s really sad but true. I don’t think I can do another serious relationship. It’s happened to me one too many times.
@@Freudster21 why do you think it keeps happening to you. It scares me I'm in a relationship again and I mistrust the girl a lot
@@callofdutybloginfo Well I’ve thought a lot about that, and thought maybe it was me. It’s not really, but to some degree it is indirectly because I have chosen these types of women in the past. However I have studied this topic a lot, and any woman is capable of doing it under the right circumstances. It is her nature, hypergamy. Also it is just the times we are in with smart phones and social media. Women have more options than they know what to do with, and if you slip up for even a second she might jump to the next guy she thinks is a better option. They do not have loyalty and the time you have invested doesn’t mean as much to them in the same way it does to a man. They are emotional creatures so if they lose the emotional connection they will start entertaining these orbiters in their text messages and in their DM’s, screening for a higher value option. The newness excites them and causes the limerence feeling and then they feel more attached to that feeling than with the old BF or husband, and they get more distant with you and then make the jump. Another thing to look very closely at is the woman’s past relationships, and sexual history. How did those end, why, and how soon after was she in a new relationship? How many casual and total sexual partners has she had? If high, like more than a few, not good, and even if it’s low, she still might monkey branch. It accelerates though the more partners they have as it lowers pair bonding ability and also, if they’ve done it before a few times why not do it again. There is no boundary being crossed anymore. They will often try to obfuscate the facts around this stuff. Find out if you might even be someone she monkey branched to, find out when her last relationship really ended and when did the guy know it was over? She might shift the timeline and he was actually still in relationship with her when yall started talking or dating/hooking up if you look into this. Or it might have been very quickly after, which would be more of a rebound than monkey branch, but also shows emotional and mental issues, immaturity. A healthy secure woman will be able to communicate arising issues prior to a breakup to allow for a course correction, and then if it still doesn’t happen then she will end the relationship, and she will show compassion and empathy for her long term partner and not just cut him off and/or ghost him after, and she take time after a long term relationship to heal, detox emotionally and process emotions from the previous relationship. Then start dating again. An insecure, attention seeking type woman who can’t be alone will do a rebound, if not a monkey branch. This is damaging to the new guy that she might get to fall in love with her, and then the rebound will inevitably deteriorate (you can look up videos on this phenomenon and why they fail so much) and she will either continue this cycle of rebound or monkey branch, or she will finally break the cycle and do the inner work and personal growth. Ask if she takes SSRI’s or other meds like this for depression, or find out if she is diagnosed cluster B personality such as narcissism or borderline. All of these are red flags not to be overlooked. Was she married before and divorced? What happened there, why did she leave (80% of time it is woman who leaves). Because if she left that one, what’s to stop her from leaving you, especially if you aren’t even married yet. Also if married to her, her second marriage has like a 65% failure rate. If she says her exes or ex husband were emotionally and mentally abusive, while it may or may not be true this is a common catch all reason that is hard to verify or counter. I have seen this pattern from women who have monkey branched from me. This is a red flag, and you will be the next one she is talking about that way to friends, family and her new man. It is called a smear campaign, to protect her social standing and so her family/social circle don’t shame her or think she is mentally unstable for jumping around into relationships and essentially cheating, because monkey branching is cheating, emotional cheating at very least, and usually they physically cheat prior to making the jump, to really get the attachment juiced up and feeling like the branch is secure now to swing to, that the new guy will be there. So there is a multitude of reasons, but just look for the red flags, vet her properly. I like to believe there are some good women out there, but they are harder and harder to find in the west in this day and age. Especially if they are single and like 30 and older, because they should have already found a good man and started having kids by this point in time, and stayed with that man. More red flags to look out for: lots of tattoos all over body, sternum tattoo under the breasts, nose ring, or other facial rings, daddy issues or talks badly about her dad, or has no relationship with him, single and around 30 years of age and older, previously divorced, cannot admit when she is wrong or take accountability, uses tactics of abuse such as silent treatment, hot cold treatment, shuts down emotionally and cannot communicate her feelings or issues she has with the relationship, poor conflict resolution skills, heavy drug use or drinking (even weed if she does it daily), posts revealing scantily clad photos on social media, this last one is interesting because I saw another person comment it as a red flag somewhere and I realized my ex monkey brancher had this as well, not sure the root cause or reason for it or if it was just coincidence, but if she says she has chronic illnesses such as Lyme disease, or something like that. Also if she is very feminist or thinks men and women are exactly the same. Hope this helps, but it is depressing cuz it is the only women I can find, so in starting to believe it’s just how it is, and society use to ostracize this type of behavior, and that was the thing holding it back, but now it is tolerated, and can be somewhat hidden because the woman usually tries to make it look like it was just starting after they broke up with prior guy, but naw it was already happening. Also they sometimes branch back to you if the new thing doesn’t work out as planned, which it usually doesn’t lol. With dating apps they can hop on and get a new guy right away too if they decide to check out from relationship. My last ex kept me thinking things were fine and didn’t say anything, in hindsight though I can see there were signs of her being less invested in the relationship, less affection, less hanging out, more excuses of things she had to do so couldn’t make time, blah blah. So look for those signs in your woman, if she pulls back she is losing attraction and will leave soon, so either try to correct what you might be doing to turn her off, or preemptively dump her. Sometimes that can make them get re-attracted, but also might not work and they just still leave anyways. If you don’t trust your current woman, then there is no relationship, do not get too invested emotionally, and realize she can discard you or cheat any time. Tell her what your boundaries are and what you expect out of her, and if she crosses them, then walk away, do not be afraid to walk.
@@Freudster21 Just wow! You have summed up pretty much everything that I have read and researched. I am an attractive guy I have had 2 longterm relationships and girls usually stick to me. I provide leadership I am headstrong and decisive. I am always push pull and I keep them on their toes. The two times that I got into serious relationship was with attractive girls. The first one I broke up and the second one monkey branched and I could never have guessed she would do such a thing. It shook me to my core because she won't even hurt a fly. She is Christian girl with good morals and all and always demonstrated to me her good nature and how deeply she believes never to hurt anyone. Yet she did that to me the father of her kids someone she chased for months before I gave in and went into a relationship. Now sometimes I regret having done this what I did and it feels like the 10 years were a giant waste of time. I have learnt alot about woman psychology in relationship during this period and your comments are absolutely spot on and we'll researched and this is exactly what's going on. The social media has given full access to these women to seek validation outside of their relationship. I am with a young one now she loves me to bits and I got yet to delete all her social media and she is complying. I am training her. I'm the 2nd one she has had sex with and I think the only way to have a relationship is to find them young and with low body count they will have lots to learn because my one doesn't know many things and I have to teach her. Man your comment has a lot of wisdom it is a summation of all my research and what is actually going on with these women. I realised that men are actually capable of unconditionally loving someone other than his kids and men are much more romantic and loving that the women. A girl with high body count absolutely cannot pair bond call me red pill but I have high body count but as a man I can pair bond and feel deep emotion. Since breaking up i have been on dates with over 25 women before finding this young one. All the rest were dead inside. When we were together they were affectionate and passionate and as soon as there was distance they completely forgot about everurging.
How can I tell if it was a rebound or she monkey branched? I know they were out on a date 3 weeks after our breakup for sure. But I can’t confirm anything earlier than that. Then a week or two after that she was posting him on her instagram stories, so it moved fast for sure but I’d like to know so I can stop ruminating if she was that disloyal and deceitful and I had no idea or if she just starting dating like a week after and then moved fast as a rebound. It would help me to heal if I could find this out, as I now have developed trust issues from this whole experience. I feel betrayed and blindsided.
What about someone she knew as a kid but never close as adults but just knew each other and were attracted to each other? This is what my ex did. Broke up with me and jumped straight into another relationship with this guy. Engaged to him on. 4 months after a 4 yr relationship with me. Went on a date with him the same week we broke up. In 6 months of dating will be married.
Bro, do you think it’s smart to marry anyone within 6 months or a year? You barely even know the person, even if they knows each other since young, a romantic relationship is a whole nother dynamic, and it is not the same, and are plus they are in limerence still. She’s fucked lol. So don’t worry, sit back, work on yourself (gym, job, and mental health) and grab some popcorn and wait for the fireworks to start within 1 year.
My ex monkey brached to another guy and after 5 months get married with him. Does it mean I lose, and they won?
Yes. Unfortunately. Living Sucks.
@@neodistinct Thanks. I asked Paz, not you unfortunately.
I understand that you might feel like you have lost and day one, but the truth of the matter is that they lost a new one because this relationship will not last due to the fact that it is based on a lie!
When we get divorced, and you will be happily married, you will realize that you are the winner .
@@GoebiowskiHardRockBand-ns9ru you are welcome
I have a story of 2 people who were starting a relationship from scratch and they got married after 4 months, they didnt last a year. Now what will happen with a relationship that starts from cheating? Dont base your decision of things that you can see(social media), because what they share the best part of the relationship, but the real life stays with them and it will take its toll.
She monkey brnchee to me fell in love with her nd eventually she left me I feel she either is gonna stay single like she claims , go back to her husband (kids dad ) or meet someone new
I have a question to ask you paz
My ex girlfriend was monckey branching for over a year did she really got to know him? well enough to make her life with him ?
My only dream is that she fail and ask me to get back ,that moment I wik reject her saying I am sorry.
If you got multiple (small) kids together , the chances it will fail is much higher.
She just got married.
Painful....but there are consequences. They haven't changed.