+Kriti Mehra Yeah, I know and I wish it were a different title reflecting that it's about gender identity and expression (or something like "Drag, gender, and how it matters" or "drag, gender, and parenting"… or even something playful and curious… like I just wrote the tagline for my film to be: "Gender Binaries can be a Drag") -- but, to tell you the truth, there was a reason that the conference chose this title, which was to try to leave some mystery for the audience as to what they would hear, because it opened a door to the trans* speaker after me -- to not judge and to "get" it more… (Sorry for the run-on sentence there!) Language is always tricky and a work in progress, and I appreciate your comment & agree! Also, a different title certainly would avoid some of the troll comments on here who miss the whole point of all of it… :) Thx -- Gabrielle
fivesistersfilms Firstly, I wish you luck for your film! I'd love to watch it tbvh. Secondly, I agree but then again, it's such a sensitive matter, that play of words can just be misleading. But yeah, I completely understand your point.
Richard Green and austin darling Hi Richard & Austin -- thanks for being part of the discussion. Did you listen to the rest of the talk and the parts about the spectrums for gender, sexuality, and biological sex identity and still feel that way? I'm interested in your thoughts on gender fluidity, if so, and also in what I might have said that made you think I was equating drag with gender fluidity -- my point is that drag makes us examine gender as a concept that isn't binary, and I definitely would not equate the two, nor equate either with cross-dressing. (FYI, Tedx chooses the youtube titles.) It's all a good conversation to have, and I look forward to hearing your input. Best -- Gabrielle
fivesistersfilms speaking for myself I too was expecting it to be about the gender identity 'gender fluid' as opposed to how the conecpt of gender can be fluid. i think the title had room for being misinterpretted. interesting talk butim in the group that misinterpreted the title so was a little disapointed but still. Ive never seen drag as a fluidity, ive seen it more as people dressing in alternative clothing, conforming to the oposite gender norms but in a big bold way, being one or other, not both and being 2 different personas... not about bluring the lines or moving across them as the term gender fluidity sugests to me.
TheSoulsshadow Thanks for this thoughtful engagement & comment. (As I said before, I didn't choose the title -- that's TEDx and TED that does & posts the talks on youtube.) I can see how you would see drag as a kind of binary performance of gender -- however, there is a lot of blurring of gender in drag and gender performance (not "passing", though that is also a style), with performers blurring the lines between male and female. Of course, it depends upon the performer, the club, the troupe, the night, the city… That said, I see more and more of the gender fluidity happening in gender expression and performance even in mainstream media, which seems promising for a more open, thoughtful approach toward gender as a concept itself.
I've been binge watching videos about gender, and remembering different moments of my life when I was told how I was supposed to look and behave because my sex is feminine. All this videos questioning gender roles and gender expression make me want to cry of happiness. I'm so glad I found people who think like me. People that tells me it's ok to be how I am. Thank you for this.
You should never of been made to feel bad about being you. Hugs for you. I'm a girl with two brothers and an extremely feminine sister. I'm straight. As a child I played war, football, lego, snooker, darts, cars, doll house and make believe alongside my brothers and we went on long bike rides and walks and was very active. On my own I invented an entire civilisation for my marbles... admittedly that was probably a little odd but who cares I had a hell of a lot of fun. I played on sports teams for my schools and have always loved swimming. I always picked the toy car over the toy my little pony at McDonalds. My Mum and Dad were fine with all of this. However as a child and a teenager my Mum never let my buy clothes from the boy's section, not even when the girls hoodie would not fit over my head and me and my Dad found a near identical one in the boys section that did fit. My mum is amazing and has a more relaxed view to this issue now that I am older. As an adult I wear what ever the hell I want, I'm a trainee engineer, I train in Karate, swim and help out with the girl guides. I can never once remember thinking that I wanted to be a boy because nobody ever made me feel bad about the things I did. I have never identified as anything but a girl. I hate it when people make a fuss about me being in a ''male'' role because a) it's a job open to everyone and b) it makes out that I was something special to have entered the field. I'm nothing special, I'm not extraordinary. I'm lucky I came from a sportive family only encountered mockery a few times like when I announced that I wanted to play professional football at church and everyone laughed at me (my parents weren't there at the time ) or the time I was told I should be a nurse because that was a good job for a girl....again at church ( starting to see a trend here). At work I have been asked on a number of occasions wouldn't you rather work with kids or not even been given the options ''oh you would love to work with kids''. Sorry that was longer that intended, long story short, you are you nobody can change that and nobody has the right to make you feel bad about it. Next time someone says you can't or shouldn't do something because you are a girl say watch me (unless of course it's illegal then don't do that because you know jail time looks bad on your cv). If your parent's still pay for your clothes you will have to stick to their wishes until you can buy your own, it's their money but you can find a lot of good options even in the girls sections, find unsex shops and shops that cater for your style. Never let anyone shame you for being you. Make you happy and learn to let go because pain is a crappy companion.
What a kind thing to share your story and reply so supportively. Thank you for this! (Particularly nice to read after seeing a bunch of simplistic, hateful commentary that doesn't seem interested in trying to look at the complexity of all our humanity...) Thank you for taking the time @5Pip.
Thank you, @Lucía; I'm so glad it moved you, and of course it's ok to be who you are -- we are all stronger for our diversity. I wish you all the best!
Please stop using ducktape, it can rip your skin, break your rips and cuase breathing problems!! Look up how to make homemade binders if you can't afford it!!
Totally. I tried to touch on this in the talk, but because it's limited time, some of the more in-depth distinctions could not be made as clearly. Thanks for being part of this conversation.
+Ben Lore Thanks. I agree on the title (as I've said in other comments), but had no input on it. I just hope that it does open up some people's thinking and starts people talking more about the possibilities for thinking… Best -- Gabrielle
As someone who self identifies as gender fluid, I was (naturally) hoping that was the topic of the video. But despite the inaccurate title, I see positive things coming from this sort of presentation, and I hope for more of them. The more we talk about transgender people openly and - pardon this word - "normally," the better we'll all be. Thank you, Gabrielle!
+Ms. Tina Zee Thank you so much, Tina. I agree (as I've said in other comments) that the title is inaccurate, but I had no control over it (even asked it to be changed on youtube, but no can do). I appreciate your comment & here's to more talking about all of this! warmly -- Gabrielle
+JesusFriedChrist There are only two genders? And I'm the delusional one? You might want to practice closing your mouth and opening your eyes. (If gender is not a spectrum, which of the only two genders is Richard Simmons, in your obviously expert opinion?)
+XGod0 Publishing to the world you will pray? You might read this first: Matthew 6:5. Telling me I'm in "grave danger"? You might read this first: John 8:7 I am an Anointed, Favored Child of G_d. He has whispered such onto my heart. The tone you take with me is the blasphemy with which you slap the Creator's face. You have co-opted His very name. I weep for your doomed soul. James 1:26-27.
Super-duper. Another lazy Christian. When your religion is only known for what it is against, it's lazy. It's gutless. It's cowardice wrapped in "holy robes." Being against something means you cannot fail. You're against gay people? Great. So you speak against gay people. And guess what? You're still against gay people. Nothing risked, no skin in the game. Coward's Christianity. On the other hand, if you step forth in Jesus' name and proclaim you're for something - that's hard. If your Christian mission is to ensure kids in your town always have food, that's something. That's real. And you can fail at it. Which is why lazy Christians like yourself will only proclaim what you're against. No risk of failure. If a kid goes hungry despite following Jesus' commands to feed the hungry, you have failed in His name - and that's hard. I get it. It's scary. You can't stomach it, so you just keep doing it the lazy way. I'll keep doing good and risking failure.
im 13. i dont feel as if i am actually a male, but i sure as hell am not a straight nor a feminine girl. i would rather wear mens clothing than womens. i have more mens shoes than womens, and i havent worn a dress or skirt since 2nd or 3rd grade. i hope that someday we get rid of gender roles, and just shop by categories of 'shoes,' 'shirts,' 'pants,' accessories,' ect... just combine things and get rid of 'mens and womens.' when i was younger there was some riddle that went "a father and son get into an accident. when they arive by ambulance at the hospital they head to the emergency room. when the doctor sees the boy they say 'i cant operate on him, hes my son.' how is that possible? it was his mom who was operating on him.' i was the only one who ever thought it could have been his mom, since i always thought that nursing was more of a womens job because doctoring is just a more complicated version i thought that it was also a womens job. so when i found out that i was the only one who had ever said its the mom, i was shocked. i thought it would be more of a womens job since it involved being kind and smart. then i also started thinking that if the answer was its his mother, then couldnt he also have 2 fathers? i dont know. i just always thought about stuff like this. my parents are homophobic, but i never was. luckily.
There are many possibilities that you could fit into. Genderfluid; some days you may feel more feminine and somedays masculine. You could also have No Gender; speaks for itself. Or you could simply have your own orientation and don't want to fit into any title. Either way, just be you!!
Sumukhi berg-olsen Okay Ill stop. Its Christmas time and I should be merry. It is wrong of me to insult her but i stand against gays regardless. That will not change. On a side note i assume you are gay too?
No, you don't have to parent your children to be in our "culture"; you parent them to be themselves and to think for themselves. You give them a neutral foundation so they can become their own person without society's, and parent's, limitations. The world doesn't change for the better with sheeple towing the line and ignorance calling the shots.
I liked the presentation a lot, thank you so much! I came expecting to hear about gender fluidity, the title is a bit misleading but anyways, great stuff.
When I have kids, I'm going give them a selection of "girl" toys and "boy's" toys and I'm going to mix them all up so they are not in any categories and tell them they can play with whatever ones they want as long as they share
@@Jerzey_grl It seems for your son, yes. Not everyone is the same. Plus what toys a person plays with don't in anyway determine a persons gender, that's like saying which drinks you pick at the bar determine your gender based on if it's perceived as a "guys" drink or a "girls" drink.
austin darling Ezri Tigris Unfortunately, it's not really possible to get *everything* into 17 1/2 minutes. :) Hopefully, this launches conversations and gets people thinking about all the possibilities!
I prefer that you don't use my sexuality as a name for a non existent "gender" which I might add coralate to biological sex meaning "asexuality" isn't a thing by your use. And yes, Asexuality is a sexuality not a gender.
_Yorick _ Why are you getting so defensive? The person above has only supported the whole point of the comment and they didn´t even knew you existed before you typed your response. Therefore they didn´t try to upset you in any way. Asexuality also is not YOUR sexuality but everyone´s who feels that way.
Excellent speech. It's time to change our archaic cultural stereotypes and embrace the beauty of reality which is as diverse as the Universe can be. To be who we really are we must go beyond what we have been taught so far and explore the unknown.
My boy wanted to paint his nails so he picked black out. He came a week later and asked to take it off because everyone keeps asking him why his nails were painted. I felt bad for him, he is not masculine but very much into girls. My daughter, on the other hand, would go crawdad fishing, play in the dirt, get bugs, play with boy legos then clean up and put her makeup on and a dress. No matter my beliefs I think they should be able to do things they enjoy and we all enjoy different stuff. Plus some day he will make some woman happy by picking out clothes with her and painting her nails, lol.
I get it, the title makes sense given the definition of both words. Lyricist often will take two words and combine them, subjectively they are interpreted. Same here for those concerned about the title. The title is fine as is.
Just want to take the time to thank you for this video! You are truly good at what you do and your thoughts and experiences are very insightful to many.
For any of you reading this, I'm a trans girl. I was born male, and my brain is always hurting emotionally. There's nothing I can do about it, (aside from what I'll tell you later) and the feeling is what creates the thoughts rather than the other way round. I am like this by *nature* , not nurture. Now I will get to the weird part. When I feel masculine I become more aware of my whole body; my broad shoulders, my strong body, and my square head. And when I feel that; my brain hurts. But when I put on a bra, or high heels, or do anything that makes me feel feminine... it stops. At least by a large amount. When I can ignore those masculine parts of me and focus my thoughts so that I feel more feminine, I feel *really good* about myself. And this isn't stemming from any conscious reasoning. I was brought up by my dad in a sporty and healthy lifestyle. I have never been abused. I always preferred hanging out with the girls. How would I describe feeling feminine for me? Giggly and sensitive. And I love it. Once when I did succumb to my dysphoria I became internally self-destructive. I had suicidal thoughts because I would rather die than not be a girl. But I felt fine when dressed as a girl. Google it. Keep questioning and don't rush to conclusions. Simply adapt theories. Being trans is science.
the thing about gender segregated toys - it reminded me of mcdonalds happy meal toys, they’re not divided based on gender but their toys are based on themes at least 1 thing mcdonalds does right
When my kid was a 3 years old he would love to wear my makeup, specially pink eyeshadow. And I knew he was just being a 3 years old. Now he is 40 and such a handsome man.
Gender Fluidity has formed part of my life for most part of my life ever since I was five years old, but I never really took Sexual Identity in count until just recently and that was when it all made sense to me. Ever since I was a little boy I knew that I only had attraction to girls so I considered my self Heterosexual witch most people considered ¨Normal¨. After some time when growing up and having some of my first sexual encounters I started realizing that it wasn't with just any one I could have a sexual attraction to, it needed to be some one who I would have had a relation ship with for some time, at first I just thought that it was something that had to do with my conscious or something like that, but I never told any one due to being afraid to get called gay or people thinking that I only have attractions towards people of the same sex as I, until I found out what Demisexual is. But than I thought that was weird because I only like girls, I am not gay, I can not have sex with some one that I have lot had a sentimental relation ship with, but ever since I was a kid I have always been into both female and male clothing, I would have fun playing with toy cars or barbies as well, I would´t care being called a girl or a boy, until just recently that I started watching videos about cross dressing and saw the word Gender Fluidity. that is when I started investigating about it and figured out that it is not just about attraction and gender, but the sexual Identity is not just part of who you are but the most important one. Now for me if some one asked me what is your sex I would say Demisexual, if some one would ask me ¨but would you consider you self or preferred to be called a man or a women?¨ I would say I don't care, If they ask me ¨do you like boys or girls?¨ I would say girls. But I do really hate how for the majority of society now a days you are either straight or gay, you are either a boy or a girl, but there is never no in between or that your identity will also influence on your sexual orientation. I could either dress as a boy or as a girls one day but that doesn't mean I likes boys, I could like girls but that doesn't mean that I am going to bang the very first women that I see, but due to that mentality some time people have to hide who they really are because they are afraid to be bullied, picked on or even taken out of their comfort zone.
The issue here isn't about what gender you are, it's about you clinging to stereotypes, and ironically thinking those stereotypes change your identity.
Aside from the title, WOW! finally ONE person who could explain all of that in a clear and visual way!! cudos to you ! And I say this because in part we do hold on to some guilt when it comes to people not understanding things. I always say and feel that it's a two way street and the speaker also has the responsability of expressing themselves in a vidid and also for the listenser understanable way. Now, I don't think this message will spread a lot, sadly, mainly because aside from everything she just said, we are raised into judeo-christian belief system. That is, aside from all the -slavery is ok, especially if it's your wife- and -gays shall burn in hell, even though literally nowhere in the Bible does it say so- etc.. above ALL of this, judeo-christian belief lies upon one single principle: the world and everything is built upon 0's and 1's, that is a dualistic approach, e.g. "good bad" and so on. The language itself proves what I'm saying, we also have ultimate comparisons like "the best" of which could only ever be just ONE. Now that is beyond sad, depressing and just the thought of it makes me want to kill myself, because really what's the point if there is only one "za best"? So my point is, going from 0's and 1's it will be really hard for people, who thus eventually become so hardwired, to suddently say no, the world is made up of many many ingredients. Say we learn this in chemistry and any mildly educated adult won't have a problem with this. But then, try to tell any adult that the whole of the Universe is literally made up of just only two opposite elements and you will probably get the same reaction, say, republicans would have to this video :))
Thanks for your comment, @whizkid. And I really agree on your point about a dualistic approach being too simplistic and ultimately damaging; in fact, I just did another TEDx Talk on acknowledging complexity, and the idea of the world not being a binary system!
+RapunxelDelano Hi there -- thanks for engaging in the discussion. My first reaction was wishing you would refrain from the labelling, because it's so complicated once we all start doing that (of course, you don't really know me or my story, so that's where all the "judging a book" issues become problematic when it's about gender/sex/sexuality, because that's what people DO -- label based on what they think they see at a glance). Labeling anyone can be damaging and can close down options (I think you'd agree), so I hope you'll consider that we're all one community -- or should be. Let's work toward that. All my best -- Gabrielle
Kyler - that comment was too far mate, too far in any circumstance. the entire pitch was about acceptance and then changing the world, and then you say that ?? you sound like the one who is unaware to me. stop being a bully, right now.
Hi; Thanks for the insight Gabrielle. I'm TS (post op). I knew at 3 years old. At 50 I transitioned (born 1955) and I am extremely happy, accepted and successful. And WOW I had no idea this was so complicated. I thought Computers were tough but being Human is right 'out there'. I'm going to stay being "me" and hope it all works out...which it is. :D Life is a Beach (and i can say that cause it's my last name) Steph PS funny in one thing that at 16:00 in the talk i saw the word "Hope" flash. When I was 4 I asked my older brother if a boy could be turned into a girl. My brother, reluctantly says ".....yes..." And the word that flash so vibrantly in my mind was "Hope!" :)
Sorry, @Talyn Birky, but I didn't have any control over the title to the talk. I'm just seeing this, so it is long after you posted -- I wish the best for you & that you find strong love and support in this 'one wild and precious life,' as poet Mary Oliver calls it.
How about if you disagree and keep it to yourself? Unless it impinges on your well-being, it's not a problem for you. Seeing two guys walking down the street doesn't hurt you in any way except you think it's wrong. So look the other way. Isn't one of the tenets of Christianity to judge not lest ye be judged? When one tends to one's own life one is happier than when one keeps looking over the fence and condemning someone else's life.
Nix he's right European tv if you see 2 men next to each other know that they are about to kiss poor us it's like watching thriller for the first time even if it's a girl being kissed you analysis hard if she's a woman before you change channels kissing on tv is not like before it's scary I don't need my psychologist I'm good just change channels and worse a boy in a music show was kissing his colleague French looooong kiss The proof it's European tv as if it's not enough in a children program 2 little bodies have one bed and the other was looking for the watch in the bedroom on the bed I was shocked what if my child asks why do they have only one bed? They should have been in jail for attempt of brain molestation children have each one bed.
I feel like this is more of a talk about Drag. I love the look into Columbus drag because I am a performer myself, but yeah this doesn't fall into what the title of the video suggests.
I still can't understand how gender and biological sex are not related. Supposedly, gender isn't related to sex, but every time someone refers to a gender it's based on how masculine or feminine someone presents themselves as being regardless of biological sex. Then, people talk about how sexual preference doesn't factor into gender either. But, you can like or find whomever sexually attractive if you want. Then, people say, that your clothes, your appearance, nor your choice in hobbies, material goods, or whatever don't factor into your gender versus biological sex. Supposedly, it's all about what you feel... If that's the case, why can't all of these things factor into how one identifies in their own bodies as whatever sex they were born with, to include intersex...?
I'm noticing a lot of the dogma slingers are the same users on each of these talks. You know, they say what you hate the most reflects the clearest because you see a part you deny. Is there something you need to address?
The term "gender fluidity" implies that gender is all socially constructed. This is the impression you are giving, as if it were the default condition. Ignoring the "nature vs nurture" argument, by assuming a priori that there is no connection between anatomical sex and gender, makes this whole speech rather meaningless. Also, the distinction between gender identity and gender roles is blurred here.
I appreciate your comment, yet I disagree & want to write, because you're obviously a thinking, engaged person. I feel you missed something in the listen -- the entire *point* of my talk is about "the distinction between gender identity and gender roles" -- it is about taking our ideas OF gender roles, and breaking that down to look at the bone-structure beneath. Additionally, a major point in the talk is about how there IS biology, and then other elements that feed into this. The line of biological sex is *exactly* about the nature part of ourselves, & showing how it is separate from nurture. Indeed, it's fundamental to consider what that means and how it plays into our ideas of gender roles (as distinct from gender identity -- which is discussed in the talk with the three parallel lines, and adding Sam Killerman's Genderbread image to address a further category that can clarify). As a side note regarding the "gender fluidity" term, TEDx chooses the talk titles and how they label it on youtube and in programs. That said, I don't agree with you that it implies social construction, because it has nothing to say about biology or society -- it's just bringing up an idea of non-binary thinking when it comes to "gender."
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I agree with fivesistersfilms. The whole "nature vs nurture" argument is a false dichotomy since nature and nurture, gender and biology intersect in so many places. They are not mutually exclusive. Yet, they represent a broad spectrum.
Talker makes sense until toward the end of the video where she explains terms and then deviates from her own definitions. 1) Biological sex: boy ..... girls 2)Sexuality: Homosexual ..... Heterosexual 3)Gender (fine, if you stick with this definition of gender, this is fine): Masculinity ..... Femininity There are in betweens where people might fall: for 1) developmental anomalies before/after birth; 2) bisexuality, a straight person sometimes attracted to a same sex person; 3) the specter of femininity and masculinity is quite broad, obviously, since a man can be feminine, a woman can be masculine to varying degrees, nobody denies this. I don't disagree with any of the above. She then says: at 13:51"On forms, you will often see gender as a substitute for the biological sex" Let me get this straight... You are saying that forms that clearly mean to register your biological sex are using the term 'Gender' as a substitute for that? Considering that 'Gender' means exactly that: biological sex, in dictionaries and common language, and in grammar (where I am aware there's a neutral gender, that's not pertinent in this discussion though, unless the form is a grammar test -.- ) You mean to say that a word that means something is being used meaning that thing?!!! Enough sarcasm in text. She goes on to explain that gender is fluid, all the while using the gender definition as clarified above: feminity and masculinity, referring to how people can be feminine and masculine to varying degrees. Yes, she is explaining something that has been figured out for many, many years among human societies. People can be a combo of sexuality, varying degrees of straightness and gayness, while also being a combo of varying degrees of masculinity and femininity. What lie between the biological sex binary are small percentiles of people with birth defects, some more serious than others, some easy to overcome, others not so much and it's a struggle and I hope medicine and psychology evolve enough to be able to help everyone affected by these anomalies effectively. So the variation when it comes to biological sex is not as common as the variation in between straight and gay sexualities. Meaning more people fall somewhere in between straight and gay than they do between the female sex and the male sex at birth. And more people fall somewhere between femininity and masculinity than they do between being straight and being gay. And there is no relationship between where people fall on the sexuality spectrum and where they fall on the feminity and masculinity spectrum. She says this, I agree. There is nothing groundbreaking here! Why are you deciding that gender (as defined above, being the spectrum of masculinity and femininity) is the same as biological sex?! If you acknowledge that gender, as you have defined it, is not biological gender then why is this news or somehow worth a TED Talk? Why are you surprised that things that have been produced mostly specifically for women and most of them have withstood the test of time (makeup and high heels for example) are marketed to women and why are you surprised that companies would do anything to hit their target public in marketing and design products specifically targeted to kids by gender? Is there a ban on girls buying soldier toys? Do you really believe that your kids are such blank slates that they base their entire identities and tendencies on where their toys and clothes come from inside a store? Of course not. Why am I even bothering with this comment? Short point is: How can you make a better world for your kids when you're confusing basic, common words yourself? How can you think that raising every little word choice and marketing choice to the status of determining factor in a child's 'gender' (as you have defined it, masculinity and femininity spectrum) is a good idea? Even taking every little thing, bundled together, turning it into a powerful white noise, humming into their ears, molding them from the inside once they internalize those ideas, how can you think that 'changing the world' is the solution? The world changes all right, but only sometimes for the better and it often comes with harmful ripple effects, because of consequences we cannot foresee. Stop trying to change the world and start trying to raise strong kids, kids with the necessary tools to deal with the world and with themselves and their own issues. Make your kids strong enough to deconstruct the voices they have internalized from childhood to adulthood. Help them understand themselves and they will understand the world better and adapt to it and be truly happy in it (at least for a while) and they'll be tough enough to live in it, in spite of it. I started addressing the talker as if she'd be the one reading this comment... She's not... but I'll say this one more thing: She starts off describing her disillusionment at herself and at the world when she grew up. Everyone goes through that. Some get stuck there, trying to solve the mystery of: "Why aren't things as my 12 year old mind had imagined them, six years ago?" So they eventually get to thinking: "It's not that my expectations were faulty, it's that the world is faulty in feeding me this stuff and being totally different! Hypocrite world! Let's change it!" When all they have to do is: "Hey, I was off by a lot. Let's see what I am really like... Let's see what I am really good at, what I am really capable of. Let's find out more about the world and why things are the way they are. Let's be mature about this and take our time, analyze and admit that our ego is smashed, our hopes have died... But I'll get through this. I have no other choice. Why be stuck whinning about things for more time than it's healthy to do so?" My hypothetical monologs suck XD But hopefully they get the point across.
Hi +niassera -- I did read this, and I think your conclusions are based on a misunderstanding of what I said about the spectrum and the definition and misuse of the word gender. Maybe watch again to listen to the complexity of the topic and what I'm actually saying? As you know, nothing can, of course, be fully covered in 17 minutes, so I was careful to bring up elements of the complexity for further discussion and research by people on their own, also aiming to include all the range of experience and diversity of people. One other note -- you use a tone of contempt and dismissiveness which seems surprising, given your clear interest in talking about complexity; everyone is human and these are discussions to have with respect -- with a goal of exchanging ideas, because otherwise, it's just people talking AT each other or into the ether. If indeed you end up having a strong different idea about the topic and some good food for thought to add to the field, you should consider pitching a TEDx Talk -- it's quite an experience to cull down a complex idea to 17 minutes and try to cover a lot of discussion through telling a story, and a worthy endeavor to put oneself out there in the world and offer an idea of food for thought. I appreciate your interest and passion, and thanks for thinking about this and trying to be part of the discussion of an important topic.
I'm happy to hear you actually read my comment. Here's my reply for all it's worth: If my conclusions are based on a misunderstanding of what you said about the spectrum and the definition and misuse of the word gender then my conclusions may be wrong. But after watching the video again I can safely say that we are speaking 2 different languages. I assume people have the common sense to raise their kids as strong, responsible people and not force gender stereotypes on them, and that the way items are organised in a shop won't determine how a child would eventually perceive their own identity. You assume that people can't help but raise their kids as either a boy or a girl stereotype and that the way the world seems to split and segregate boys and girls reinforces stereotypes. Truth should be there, somewhere in the middle. This is a non-issue. This gender debate and the idea of gender fluidity, it's not a real problem that can be solved. You can talk about it and you can make unicorns and gingerbread people to explain sex, gender identity, sexuality, but you're only making things worse and more complicated than they need to be. By 'you' here I do mean you and everyone else arguing for gender fluidity and teaching children this. Let me put it another way: There's boys, and girls. Any inbetween biologically is suffering from a biological abnormality in fetus development and is not an in-between sex, or a third gender. The normal biological sexes are boy and girl. There's gay and straight, and there may be some who lean and swing in-between, but the normal, majority sexuality is straight. People who are gay, should be free to be gay and should have all the rights that straight people have, but sexuality in general and gay sexuality especially are not something one would or should wish to discuss with children (younger than 13), yet the gender fluid activists are pushing to discuss sexuality with children in schools, which is not all right imo. Gender expression is first of all cultural. Second of all historical and thirdly, it's personal and volatile - it can change as often as you change socks. Gender expression is fashion. Gender identity, according to gender fluidity activists (you seem to be one of them, although a mild one), is a spectrum between feminine and masculine. Gender and biological sex have different definitions according to these activists but are often used as if to mean the same thing. For instance: Gender on forms (your example) does not refer to gender identity. Nobody on a form cares about how feminine or masculine you are, or you 'feel' you are... that day, because, who know? it's fluid, it can change. Gender on forms always refers to sex, biological sex of which you can be one of two (birth defects are not biological sexes). Gender in language, as in 'he' or 'she' - these refer to biological sex or how one appears/presents themselves (gender expression) of which there can only be two: boy or girl. What are your thoughts on neutral pronouns? People these days, they are afraid to say the simple truth: Humans are either males or females, they are normally (meaning generally, in an overwhelming majority) heterosexual, and they generally adhere to certain societal expectations that have been born and continue to change as a result of human biology, human environment, history, and material possibilities (as in science, technology and quality of life). Intersex people are very unfortunate and need help, both physically and psychologically, and in Western society I am sure they are better off than in other countries. They suffer from birth defects and do not represent nature's way of saying: "Look! Biological sex is on a spectrum, don't be so uptight and don't think there are only 2 genders!" Homosexuals are not only a minority but also do not represent a natural, normal inclination in humans, because otherwise, humans would die off. Homosexuals are exceptions and yes, we need to learn to live with them and Western societies have done the best job at that, accepting homosexuality and offering freedom and human rights - this is great. Gender expression: feminine, masculine - well, obviously this is a spectrum and it's volatile. It's fashion. It's stereotypical roles vs non-stereotypical roles, which evolve and change. But you know, generally, females make good moms, nurturing, compassionate, orderly, agreeable. And males, generally, make good dads, firm, aggressive defenders, strict, cool-headed, responsible. And in reality there are all sorts of moms and all sorts of dads and even if there are general types, the particulars will always differ in intensity and combination. But that's fine, the roles don't change much. The more you live the more you learn, right? So everyone should be encouraged to learn a little more about themselves and others. Stereotypes should be challenged ( we humans love doing that). But trying 'to change the world' by messing around with useful notions and turning them useless because there are some exceptions to the rule, that's like playing with fire. Pretty soon when a child asks their mom: "Why do you put on makeup?" The mom will freeze in contemplation of the meaning of makeup, gender expression and gender stereotypes. And if that kid is a girl, then be sure to mention that she's not obligated to wear makeup and that she can choose not to wear it and if the kid is a boy, be sure to explain that if they wish they can wear makeup when they're older and that some boy wear makeup.... And in the meantime, some kids somewhere are bullying another kid because... he's wearing shit clothes and is poor. Guess the biological gender of those kids? Guess the gender role they are expressing? Guess their sexual orientation? You can't? Good. Because it doesn't matter. This is a non-issue. The combinations and possibilities of expressing one's gender and of expressing femininity or masculinity are as endless as are the combinations of personality in humans. Biological sex=biological gender = boy or girl. Assumptions about biological gender?! So what? Humans always make assumptions. You guys, trying to change the world one confused definition at a time can only succeed in confusing future generations. Already there are many who think they are neither male nor female. I can't keep a straight argument about this, most likely because I have too many ideas and virtually no debating experience. I tend to talk AT people because I have that sort of shitty personality. Sorry.
It's just seems so foolish to me, from where I stand (not in a Western society!) that there's a bunch of activists trying to split hairs and explain the most common sense things in the most uncommon ways, dress it all up in good intentions and then let it loose upon young kids' minds. I understand how difficult it is to raise a kid for the society he/she will be a part of - you want to make sure they have the tools and abilities necessary to survive and succeed. But turning 'gender' into this whole mess only does kids harm. You (the Westerners) are taking 'logical' conclusions to a whole level, beyond reasonableness: boys and girls are the same biologically (the biological sex is the only difference), hence they start out with the same gender, we split them into boys and girls, biology and hormones have nothing to do with this (and if you say they do, then boys and girls are not biologically the same are they and there would be different tendencies, wouldn't there?), women can do whatever men can do and vice-versa (but women can't pass certain physical trails, men can, and men can pass certain psychological trails, women can, imo) society determines gender? Now, I realise you've personally not gone into all that non-sense and you've kept it real for the most part. But really, you're pulling at non-issues from where I am standing: fashion choices for boy and girls? Lego choices for boys and girls? Lack of equal representation of boy, and girl lego people in boy's sets? A dentist who's trying to be polite and just goes with platitudes and assumes generalities about your baby? (he's not making actual life rules for your kid, he's just being polite and trying to be pleasant and sympathetic with you, the mom. He's not presenting his -omg! he might be a woman dentist! Such important stuff there... He's not presenting his opinions of boys and girls, he's assuming your expectations of your boy or girl. He thinks it's pleasing for a mom to learn she's given birth to a boy that will be strong, healthy, physical, athletic and the same goes for the girl. The fact that your girl asked: How do you know it's a man?... Well, yes. That's a valid question. It's a detective's sort of question. It's not a groundbreaking thing, I'm sorry to say. You may have been assuming it had been a male thief. You may have been surprised at the fresh possibility: What if it was a woman thief? It's not a groundbreaking thing. And you assuming it had been a male, or speaking as if you had assumed that (using the 'he' instead of she) is not a general statement about the male gender - it's just how you saw it at the moment. Had you been speaking another language you'd have found other means to express his assumed gender, or not. My own native languge doesn't allow for 'lack of gender' or gender neutral expression when you speak to or about someone. It's all either feminine or masculine form. Assuming someone's gender may mean assuming possibilities for said gender (sex, yes, gender here is sex. It's always sex! In my language, there's no difference, by the way. Gender means biological sex, it's what you're assuming when you're imagining someone unknown in a certain position. You don't assume their gender expression or sexual orientation or gender identity, you always assume biological sex, that's the only clear thing that can be known and assumed), so it may mean assuming the thief is most likely a man. So? It probably is most likely a man. It doesn't mean it can't be a woman. Assuming something is not a political statement. Assumptions are assumptions. And teaching people to not assume or to assume everything or to assume the opposite of what they'd normally assume is unnatural. Assumptions come to be from culture, experience, history, knowledge, wishful thinking, expectations, etc and are not the same with prejudice. Ok. I'll shut up now. I am probably going about this all roundabouty and weird like. I am not a debater, nor am I the best person to explain such things. Just to conclude: it's a non-issue. It's not a real problem. It's in your head. It's in everyone's head and it will never go away because people will always assume things, generalities will always exist, stereotypes will always be there, we think and process the world, ourselves and those around us in a very generalised, narrow way because our attention is limited and we are human. Even when we are being inclusive we are being exclusive and our categorizations have a point to them when we exclude something from that category, and we are prone to put other people in certain categories and other people in other categories. You cannot change the world, you cannot change how humans think, the methods and means of creating and defining types. You can broaden certain views and you can dismantle certain wrong assumptions, but don't attack the core, the reality, in this case: two genders (yes biological!), different and complex people, but only two genders. Exceptions? Yes, there may be! Do exceptions change the way a category is defined? No, unless you're doing math. Exceptions are exceptions. I realise it was no small task to come up with this talk and I personally could never do it, aside from the language issue. But frankly, it's still nothing new or particularly useful, it resembles the way certain activists for gender fluidity are trying to muddy the waters and it's not bringing anything new to an age old issue: girls can be not very girly and boy can be not very manly, and the society expects certain gender expressions and roles and actions of the boy and others of the girl - only they don't because you live in a place where a boy can wear a dress and kiss another boy and be girly and not get grief about it. You live in a place where you can be gay and trans and happy! You complain about how merchandise is displayed in a store and how boy and girls are split into boys and girls. No such thing as a gender-neutral society and if there ever will be it would make for a very odd dystopia. Really think about it... Or don't.
As the mother of five sons, it never bothered me if they played with toys that traditionally were “girl’s toys”. And as I grew up, I was a “tomboy”. It’s just that back then, we didn’t call it anything special-we were just kids. We didn’t make a big deal. These days any and everything gets big media attention whether it needs it or not! It’s quite ridiculous. I love “Ted Talks”, but I just wish they wouldn’t make a big deal about half of the things like this that just don’t need to have an entire talk about it. It’s just life...
It's interesting how so many people who decide to espouse concepts like gender and genderfluidity have no background in biology, medicine or psychology. Rather they are filmmakers, musicians, politicians or people who have studied the humanities. Seriously, do you really expect something worthwhile out of this presentation, beyond the interesting aspects the personal life of an individual might have? Why does someone who has no background in studying sexuality, physiology and psychology, have any more insight in this than a carpenter? It's therefore not surprising that she actually doesn't say anything more than what you can hear in any other presentation on the subject. There are people who are born with incomplete sets of genitalia, there seem to be people who are transsexual, there seem to be asexual people. (I chose this phrasing because we actually know very little about those things.)Those comprise not even 1% of the general population. There are different summaries that highlight how many people are homosexual or bisexual and estimates vary from 5-10%. There is a spectrum of sexual behavior regarding the choice of partners. The other side is that a "binary" view on the sexes is perfectly legitimate because the other 95% generally do not fit the groups mentioned before. Marketing is a good example for that. Companies do not force you to buy their products and they monitor very heavily what consumers want. Consumers do not behave the way they do because advertisements tell them to or companies mold them. It is the other way round. Companies and their advertising only exaggerate what we already want because they compete for sales that we voluntarily engage in. The result are "binary" strategies of marketing, that are highly successful because almost all of humanity fits that binary. Maybe gender isn't "male" or "female" but for most of humanity that generalisation actually fits any practical consideration.
This is indeed a very poor reasoning and a quite insensitive one. Going along the line of "simplicity", we could have stayed with the two-drawer divide frome the cave ages; either you're able to survive or you die, nothing in-between, no medicine, no emergency services, no fire fighters, no pyschologists, etc. The couplet about marketing is the very example of biased reference, with heavy self-looped-back retroaction: my society is getting more violent, therefore, I offer kids weapons as toys, and I sell weapons and fences to adults. Looks great to make a marketing (or law-making or city regulation) policy indulging towards less violence in the cities! Moreover, from science point of view, what is indeed really interesting (any real high level scientist will tell you so) is not what gets the model confirmed but what /may/ indicate that the model needs to be revisited. Of course, science or scientific approach is of no interest for "any practical consideration"...
Not true. I had 5 sons born 1984-1993. One of my sons preferred pink and playing with girl and typical girl play (except when he invented weapons.) Another one dressed up as princesses and took ballet. They're all secure, hetero males.
+Muriel Hykes Hi Muriel -- thanks for the comment. What do you mean by "not true"? The point is that boys should be able to play with any type of toy -- that toys and clothes ideally wouldn't be labeled as "girl" OR "boy" but just "toys" and "clothes" -- maybe as "trucks and cars" and "dolls" or "pants" and "scalloped sleeved shirts"… you get the idea. And ALL of this has nothing to do with sexuality. That's the whole point of my talk -- but most people do associate clothes or toys with sexual preference, rather than realizing they are not connected. All best -- Gabrielle
Not all of us pushed children into stereotypical toys. I was taught that the difference between boys and girls was a result of societal pressures and expectations. I tried to turn my boys into nurturing, sweet, non-violent creatures. Oh, I have stories, believe me!
Though this is talking mainly about gender and its expression, genderfluid isnt a concept that just been made up recently by tumblr. Genderfluid may just seem to be because of the recent craze of tumblr cringe of kids saying inaccurate and dumb things.
kuroichan101 You're right. Expressions of gender fluidity have been clear throughout human history! If only people did their research.... so many I'll-informed comments with a complete lack of empathy and understanding here. It's very sad to see. :(
The thing is that spectrums don't really accurately represent these aspects of people's personal identification (aside from biological sex) spectrums are too two dimensional, and exclude people who fall outside of the area between the bianaries
+Annie Elliott Hi Annie -- I find this such an engaging comment, and I'd like to hear more of what you mean. I will be talking more about this, when my film comes out this upcoming year, and I am interested to hear how I can represent the idea or visual model differently, if its makes more sense and will be more inclusive. Thanks -- Gabrielle
So, I can tell you how I feel but if someone else sees me differently, do offend them by forcing them to see you the way you want to be seen? Doesn’t seem very tolerant😂
Hmmm, I am not hearing the gender fluidity. This sounds more like binary constructs, she even said that when talking about her son and wanted the bright colored shoes and socialized society. Wrong title for sure.
+April Chartrand (AC) Agreed, April, about the title (no control over it). Let me know more about your ideas for models and representation that would reflect beyond the binary (my goal), as I'll be doing more talks this upcoming year with the film. Thanks -- Gabrielle
+fivesistersfilms www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/06/17/ruby-rose-gender-fluid-video-interview_n_7603186.html Ruby Rose breaks down the fluidity. It is not a fixed binanry construct was presented you your presentation. The a wide axis of feelings, identity, gender preference (or preference can change over time), and partner selection might change over time depending on the dynamics of the relatioship. Some folks that are fluid anre asexual or gender non-confirmeing (gender variant). What you lecture presented was not in keeping with the title. Very misleading. nonbinary.org/wiki/Genderfluid here is a site that explains some of the details of what is called Genderfluid. Homework time.
For more info on the shout-outs in this talk, check out:@GDIGM @MaskYouLiveIn @RepresentPledge @JenSiebelNewsom facebook.com/TheMaskYouLiveIn itspronouncedmetrosexual.com/2012/03/the-genderbread-person-v2-0/ facebook.com/MetroSam kingsqueensinbetweens.com facebook.com/KingsQueensInBetweens www.fivesisters.com
Gabrielle Burton: I have a five-year-old boy and a six-year-old girl and they are the most intelligent, perfect, fabulous extraordinary, inspiring, creative little creatures on the planet, of course, that's a fact. That's a little ambitious wouldn't you say? Sounds like every parent I've ever had the misfortune of meeting and made the grave mistake of asking if they have children of their own. They instantly dive into a self-worshiping spiral that quickly becomes embarrassing and annoying to all within earshot, let's wait a decade or two before you start passing your offspring as the best thing since sliced bread and crowning them as ''inspiring or creative''. I hate to burst your bubble, but the truth is, most will be mediocre to average at best.
+Kezzie Recaps Hi Kezzie -- I'm interested to hear your thoughts & input, as I will be giving more talks connected with the film in the upcoming year. It's always hard to cover EVERYTHING (impossible, really), and people disagree on many aspects -- still I'm definitely am open to thoughts as to how to make the language, the points, or the visual models more inclusive or representative. Thanks so much -- Gabrielle
It's always great to see people wanting to learn! It's been a while since I've seen your talk now, but as I now quickly go through the video again, I get to minute 11 and that is where it really gets binary (both terms and explanation). I definitely recommend Ashley Mardell 's ABCs of LGBT series if you want to get more information on gender, sexuality, etc. I know it is difficult to explain everything at once, it's basically bombarding people with information. I know it is hard but even if you're not including all possibilities, I find it useful to let people know that what you're talking about is only a little piece of the spectrum. Again, thank you for asking for input.
Don't define yourself by your gender it's non sense... Gay, bisexual, lesbians are more than that label. They are also professionals, brothers, sisters, friends, etc..
The male and female social construct just makes things simple, why try to complicate things? Look I'm starting to understand the argument the more I look into it, but at the end of the day, the only reason I see to dismiss gender roles would be to let a cross dressers feel more comfortable in society.
***** //Here's the trouble: we don't separate "masculine" from "male" and "feminine" from "female".// There's really no need to, when i walk down the street and see a female, I would expect her to be feminine, if she is not, then so be it... and that's that... //We expect all males to act in ways that have been arbitrarily labeled masculine, and we expect all females to act in ways that have been arbitrarily labeled feminine.// Yup, and it's not a big deal, If my presupposition is wrong, then the fabric of space and time still seem to be in tact, //And then when people don't conform to this expectation, as inevitably they don't, we get angry with the person for it.// actually, majority of males are masculine, and majority of females are feminine, and if by chance we encounter the minority male whom is feminine, then so what? I'm not going to get angry...you're just assuming everyone who see's a feminine male gets angry....where are your numbers to support this? In fact i'd say most people probably don't care. //It should be okay for a man to take care of children, or a woman to not want children: just to give an example.// you claim that it "should be okay" but actually It is okay!!! it's NOT against the law, the reality is people are FREE to express themselves, and the issue HERE IS you're not trying to change a law, you're trying to enforce your opinions on others...just because YOU THINK it's okay for men to cross dress doesn't mean I HAVE TO. People try to equivocate racism and gender roles....but there is a big issue, racism was in the law, however, gender roles are just opinions...therefore there is no issue for people to have their own opinions. So your point is pointless.
+Parthalam Lancer You say we should take action because "people get harassed" but you provided no evidence to support your claim...while I agree gay people probably do get harassed by some, as long as it's not physical contact then this "harassment" you speak of is probably just someone exercising free speech...the fact is people get harassed every day for different reasons...but this is just one of the many out comes that come with freedom of speech
***** While this is a comment section, that isn't a valid excuse to not back your claim. You obviously felt the need to reply and give your view on the issue or to correct. If that is so, you either are doing it because you can;'t control yourself or you hope to sway people's minds and possibly educate them. If you're going to argue on the issue of the video or anything else, using rhetoric to get people to understand your view and possibly change their mind is what you should always so. Would you not agree you would do better that way? I don't think you need to use 200 sources, but backing a claim might make your case rather than just a baseless opinion which really becomes a fruitless one.
***** an argument brought forth with not evidence will be dismissed without evidence....but referring to your experience, i'm sorry that happened...and many guys do expect women to not have armpit hair, and you are free to grow it if you wish, but please don't complain because people think it's weird you have it, it is simply just an opinion.
My one criticism is that at the end she said its "not all black or white" and I know that she meant that in a figurative manner, but she literally left out concepts of intersectionality around, uh--RACE along with gender-ex/bio-sex/sexuality, and how that factor affects the others in how people are treated socially. Just sayin.
Thanks for this input; you're right @TUXYguardian, I couldn't include everything and was hoping that the implying that hint about race too would open up further conversations. (beyond 17 minutes!) These are important things to talk about -- lots more complexity to address and acknowledge, and I appreciate your making this comment.
WILL WE STOP TALKING ABOUT GENDER FROM A SOCIAL STANDPOINT AND START TALKING ABOUT IT FROM A SCIENTIFIC STANDPOINT? THERE IS ACTUAL BIOLOGICAL SCIENCE BEHIND BEING TRANS, AND PEOPLE ARE OVERLOOKING THAT FACT SO DAM MUCH.
+32SQUID saying that something people identify as is fake or invalid is really insensitive. In a lot of cases, being gender fluid is something that is hard to come to terms with, and to have people say that it is not a real thing is just hurtful. Besides, the talker herself said that the use of the word gender fluid in the title was not her doing and not appropriate.
Yes, but the USA is in chronic debt and has serious divisions. There is nothing new under the sun and the reason that people in the past came up with the social structures was because it produced a fixed sense of social duty, and it seemed to work to make the national body strong. Societies are like bodies. We now have a cultural suicide happening.
Okay all of you can be all those different shades of grey but us boys are going to be blue and the girls are going to be pink that's how it's going to be and you ain't changing it
It is so confortable go to the stores divided in sections for men and women. You dont have to go through everything to find what we are looking for. When we raise a child you show them our manners. It is the parents job to give them directions!
Masculinity and feminist, which stipulations are used for each one are arbitrary on location and time, is somewhat fluid but also, in best terms, relative to each person. However, there are only three genders. Make, female, and intersex.
Thanks for the comment. Regarding biological sex (I prefer using "biological sex" than gender, as gender can be biology but also expression, performance, etc.), I am not sure all research would agree that there are only 3, because on a DNA level (the XX, XY, XXO, and so forth), there is a lot we are all learning about these categorizations, so I think we have to keep an open mind as to what we may find in the future regarding all these ideas and catalogings. That said, the title of "fluidity" was not mine (as I've said in the comments before), and my focus and interest is in more opening up the discussion about these elements not being binary, and not definitively assumptive... there's a lot to be discussed.
Anyone with a y chromosome is biologically male so there are only technically 2 biological sexes. Gender could mean anything from gender expression,identity, or roles. Gender is a spectrum with male or female on either side.
@kuroichan101 Thanks for being engaged in the conversation. Here's some quick info on more of the complexity on this not just being a binary definition: www.who.int/genomics/gender/en/index1.html
They got the name so wrong. She is speaking of gender identity NOT genderfluidity. Seriously guys that's a major bummer.
+Kriti Mehra Yeah, I know and I wish it were a different title reflecting that it's about gender identity and expression (or something like "Drag, gender, and how it matters" or "drag, gender, and parenting"… or even something playful and curious… like I just wrote the tagline for my film to be: "Gender Binaries can be a Drag") -- but, to tell you the truth, there was a reason that the conference chose this title, which was to try to leave some mystery for the audience as to what they would hear, because it opened a door to the trans* speaker after me -- to not judge and to "get" it more… (Sorry for the run-on sentence there!) Language is always tricky and a work in progress, and I appreciate your comment & agree! Also, a different title certainly would avoid some of the troll comments on here who miss the whole point of all of it… :) Thx -- Gabrielle
+Kriti Mehra I know right.
fivesistersfilms Firstly, I wish you luck for your film! I'd love to watch it tbvh.
Secondly, I agree but then again, it's such a sensitive matter, that play of words can just be misleading. But yeah, I completely understand your point.
Thanks, Kriti. "Kings, Queens, & In-Betweens" is starting touring now, so I hope it'll come to your town!
Really the title and subject could have covered both. Simply call the video "imagination".
Still waiting on the gender fluid part of this lecture.
Richard Green me to
Gender fluidity in not equal to crossdressing and drag. Sigh.
Richard Green and austin darling Hi Richard & Austin -- thanks for being part of the discussion. Did you listen to the rest of the talk and the parts about the spectrums for gender, sexuality, and biological sex identity and still feel that way? I'm interested in your thoughts on gender fluidity, if so, and also in what I might have said that made you think I was equating drag with gender fluidity -- my point is that drag makes us examine gender as a concept that isn't binary, and I definitely would not equate the two, nor equate either with cross-dressing. (FYI, Tedx chooses the youtube titles.) It's all a good conversation to have, and I look forward to hearing your input. Best -- Gabrielle
fivesistersfilms speaking for myself I too was expecting it to be about the gender identity 'gender fluid' as opposed to how the conecpt of gender can be fluid. i think the title had room for being misinterpretted. interesting talk butim in the group that misinterpreted the title so was a little disapointed but still.
Ive never seen drag as a fluidity, ive seen it more as people dressing in alternative clothing, conforming to the oposite gender norms but in a big bold way, being one or other, not both and being 2 different personas... not about bluring the lines or moving across them as the term gender fluidity sugests to me.
TheSoulsshadow Thanks for this thoughtful engagement & comment. (As I said before, I didn't choose the title -- that's TEDx and TED that does & posts the talks on youtube.) I can see how you would see drag as a kind of binary performance of gender -- however, there is a lot of blurring of gender in drag and gender performance (not "passing", though that is also a style), with performers blurring the lines between male and female. Of course, it depends upon the performer, the club, the troupe, the night, the city… That said, I see more and more of the gender fluidity happening in gender expression and performance even in mainstream media, which seems promising for a more open, thoughtful approach toward gender as a concept itself.
I've been binge watching videos about gender, and remembering different moments of my life when I was told how I was supposed to look and behave because my sex is feminine. All this videos questioning gender roles and gender expression make me want to cry of happiness. I'm so glad I found people who think like me. People that tells me it's ok to be how I am. Thank you for this.
You should never of been made to feel bad about being you. Hugs for you.
I'm a girl with two brothers and an extremely feminine sister. I'm straight.
As a child I played war, football, lego, snooker, darts, cars, doll house and make believe alongside my brothers and we went on long bike rides and walks and was very active. On my own I invented an entire civilisation for my marbles... admittedly that was probably a little odd but who cares I had a hell of a lot of fun. I played on sports teams for my schools and have always loved swimming. I always picked the toy car over the toy my little pony at McDonalds. My Mum and Dad were fine with all of this. However as a child and a teenager my Mum never let my buy clothes from the boy's section, not even when the girls hoodie would not fit over my head and me and my Dad found a near identical one in the boys section that did fit. My mum is amazing and has a more relaxed view to this issue now that I am older.
As an adult I wear what ever the hell I want, I'm a trainee engineer, I train in Karate, swim and help out with the girl guides. I can never once remember thinking that I wanted to be a boy because nobody ever made me feel bad about the things I did. I have never identified as anything but a girl.
I hate it when people make a fuss about me being in a ''male'' role because a) it's a job open to everyone and b) it makes out that I was something special to have entered the field. I'm nothing special, I'm not extraordinary.
I'm lucky I came from a sportive family only encountered mockery a few times like when I announced that I wanted to play professional football at church and everyone laughed at me (my parents weren't there at the time ) or the time I was told I should be a nurse because that was a good job for a girl....again at church ( starting to see a trend here). At work I have been asked on a number of occasions wouldn't you rather work with kids or not even been given the options ''oh you would love to work with kids''.
Sorry that was longer that intended, long story short, you are you nobody can change that and nobody has the right to make you feel bad about it. Next time someone says you can't or shouldn't do something because you are a girl say watch me (unless of course it's illegal then don't do that because you know jail time looks bad on your cv). If your parent's still pay for your clothes you will have to stick to their wishes until you can buy your own, it's their money but you can find a lot of good options even in the girls sections, find unsex shops and shops that cater for your style.
Never let anyone shame you for being you. Make you happy and learn to let go because pain is a crappy companion.
Unique and extra-ordinary you indeed are. That can make some people pissed off. But who are they for us to care about?
What a kind thing to share your story and reply so supportively. Thank you for this! (Particularly nice to read after seeing a bunch of simplistic, hateful commentary that doesn't seem interested in trying to look at the complexity of all our humanity...) Thank you for taking the time @5Pip.
Thank you, @Lucía; I'm so glad it moved you, and of course it's ok to be who you are -- we are all stronger for our diversity. I wish you all the best!
Lucía Alberino don’t be brainwashed by the media
Good presentation but the title is a little missleading.
+robertwalters Agreed (I had no control over the title put on youtube). Thanks for the comment! -- Gabrielle
Good presentation? Silliness.
Reminder to please not bind with duct tape or ace bandages.
LOLOLOL
what happens with duct tape? I use it sometimes, maybe I should stop though D:
+Max's Life DUCT TAPE IS HORRIBLE FOR BINDING! IT CAN CAUSE YOU SERIOUS CHEST PROBLEMS!
Please stop using ducktape, it can rip your skin, break your rips and cuase breathing problems!! Look up how to make homemade binders if you can't afford it!!
+32SQUID What's so funny?
"It's here, it's queer, and we're used to it" That's how my friends described me once...
How sweet!
Jakku Chan sin exists
Job Search thank you job search very cool
Also gender expression does not equal gender identity.
Totally. I tried to touch on this in the talk, but because it's limited time, some of the more in-depth distinctions could not be made as clearly. Thanks for being part of this conversation.
Maara Strife very true
I was thinking that whilst watching this! I was like "there's more but I guess you start of small"
This is an important distiction peopler dont get
So, this is about gender identity, not gender fluidity. Nice false advertisement but hey, good observations and beginning to understanding gender
+Ben Lore Thanks. I agree on the title (as I've said in other comments), but had no input on it. I just hope that it does open up some people's thinking and starts people talking more about the possibilities for thinking… Best -- Gabrielle
i like how she touched on different subjects briefly
This is one of the best videos, in my nine years of watching TH-cam, that I have ever seen.
+Sofia Haken Wow -- thank you so much! All my best -- Gabrielle
As someone who self identifies as gender fluid, I was (naturally) hoping that was the topic of the video. But despite the inaccurate title, I see positive things coming from this sort of presentation, and I hope for more of them. The more we talk about transgender people openly and - pardon this word - "normally," the better we'll all be. Thank you, Gabrielle!
+Ms. Tina Zee Thank you so much, Tina. I agree (as I've said in other comments) that the title is inaccurate, but I had no control over it (even asked it to be changed on youtube, but no can do). I appreciate your comment & here's to more talking about all of this! warmly -- Gabrielle
+The Launching Pad If you weren't aware, nowadays, "T*anny" is considered a slur in most progressive circles.
+JesusFriedChrist There are only two genders? And I'm the delusional one? You might want to practice closing your mouth and opening your eyes.
(If gender is not a spectrum, which of the only two genders is Richard Simmons, in your obviously expert opinion?)
+XGod0 Publishing to the world you will pray? You might read this first: Matthew 6:5.
Telling me I'm in "grave danger"? You might read this first: John 8:7
I am an Anointed, Favored Child of G_d. He has whispered such onto my heart. The tone you take with me is the blasphemy with which you slap the Creator's face. You have co-opted His very name. I weep for your doomed soul.
James 1:26-27.
Super-duper. Another lazy Christian.
When your religion is only known for what it is against, it's lazy. It's gutless. It's cowardice wrapped in "holy robes."
Being against something means you cannot fail. You're against gay people? Great. So you speak against gay people. And guess what? You're still against gay people. Nothing risked, no skin in the game. Coward's Christianity.
On the other hand, if you step forth in Jesus' name and proclaim you're for something - that's hard. If your Christian mission is to ensure kids in your town always have food, that's something. That's real.
And you can fail at it.
Which is why lazy Christians like yourself will only proclaim what you're against. No risk of failure. If a kid goes hungry despite following Jesus' commands to feed the hungry, you have failed in His name - and that's hard.
I get it. It's scary. You can't stomach it, so you just keep doing it the lazy way.
I'll keep doing good and risking failure.
im 13. i dont feel as if i am actually a male, but i sure as hell am not a straight nor a feminine girl. i would rather wear mens clothing than womens. i have more mens shoes than womens, and i havent worn a dress or skirt since 2nd or 3rd grade. i hope that someday we get rid of gender roles, and just shop by categories of 'shoes,' 'shirts,' 'pants,' accessories,' ect... just combine things and get rid of 'mens and womens.'
when i was younger there was some riddle that went "a father and son get into an accident. when they arive by ambulance at the hospital they head to the emergency room. when the doctor sees the boy they say 'i cant operate on him, hes my son.' how is that possible? it was his mom who was operating on him.' i was the only one who ever thought it could have been his mom, since i always thought that nursing was more of a womens job because doctoring is just a more complicated version i thought that it was also a womens job. so when i found out that i was the only one who had ever said its the mom, i was shocked. i thought it would be more of a womens job since it involved being kind and smart. then i also started thinking that if the answer was its his mother, then couldnt he also have 2 fathers? i dont know. i just always thought about stuff like this. my parents are homophobic, but i never was. luckily.
There are many possibilities that you could fit into. Genderfluid; some days you may feel more feminine and somedays masculine. You could also have No Gender; speaks for itself. Or you could simply have your own orientation and don't want to fit into any title. Either way, just be you!!
SkodaGMS thx!
That picture of you is fugly btw
Caroline Klein Death is your only salvation. Quite ironic isnt it?
Sumukhi berg-olsen Okay Ill stop. Its Christmas time and I should be merry. It is wrong of me to insult her but i stand against gays regardless. That will not change.
On a side note i assume you are gay too?
This video speaks to me on so many levels, and it vocalizes everything I've been thinking for the past few years. This is beautiful
Thank you, @FuQiao -- all best to you...
No, you don't have to parent your children to be in our "culture"; you parent them to be themselves and to think for themselves. You give them a neutral foundation so they can become their own person without society's, and parent's, limitations. The world doesn't change for the better with sheeple towing the line and ignorance calling the shots.
"These things are a lot more complicated..."
Only if you intentionally complicate them.
I liked the presentation a lot, thank you so much! I came expecting to hear about gender fluidity, the title is a bit misleading but anyways, great stuff.
Thank you! Best - Gabrielle
What were you expecting to hear? I think she's already addressed gender fluidity quite well.
When I have kids, I'm going give them a selection of "girl" toys and "boy's" toys and I'm going to mix them all up so they are not in any categories and tell them they can play with whatever ones they want as long as they share
Soz Man l did exactly that but l realized that my little girl copy me and the result is an extremely binary child .
Soz Man don’t confuse your kids please
My son always chooses cars over dolls or plush toys. Gender is biological.
@@Jerzey_grl It seems for your son, yes. Not everyone is the same. Plus what toys a person plays with don't in anyway determine a persons gender, that's like saying which drinks you pick at the bar determine your gender based on if it's perceived as a "guys" drink or a "girls" drink.
They have forgotten about asexual people in this video.
Aradia Megido yes she left out a lot other identifications.
austin darling Ezri Tigris Unfortunately, it's not really possible to get *everything* into 17 1/2 minutes. :) Hopefully, this launches conversations and gets people thinking about all the possibilities!
I prefer that you don't use my sexuality as a name for a non existent "gender" which I might add coralate to biological sex meaning "asexuality" isn't a thing by your use. And yes, Asexuality is a sexuality not a gender.
_Yorick _ Why are you getting so defensive? The person above has only supported the whole point of the comment and they didn´t even knew you existed before you typed your response. Therefore they didn´t try to upset you in any way. Asexuality also is not YOUR sexuality but everyone´s who feels that way.
Excellent speech. It's time to change our archaic cultural stereotypes and embrace the beauty of reality which is as diverse as the Universe can be. To be who we really are we must go beyond what we have been taught so far and explore the unknown.
a different gender for every different ppl on earth, 6 billions of genders, sure, that s the natural order, that s reality.
Archaic? They are still around today so how are they archaic?
My boy wanted to paint his nails so he picked black out. He came a week later and asked to take it off because everyone keeps asking him why his nails were painted. I felt bad for him, he is not masculine but very much into girls. My daughter, on the other hand, would go crawdad fishing, play in the dirt, get bugs, play with boy legos then clean up and put her makeup on and a dress. No matter my beliefs I think they should be able to do things they enjoy and we all enjoy different stuff. Plus some day he will make some woman happy by picking out clothes with her and painting her nails, lol.
Awww this is so swet
I get it, the title makes sense given the definition of both words. Lyricist often will take two words and combine them, subjectively they are interpreted. Same here for those concerned about the title. The title is fine as is.
Just want to take the time to thank you for this video! You are truly good at what you do and your thoughts and experiences are very insightful to many.
+Thalia M Thank you, Thalia!
For any of you reading this, I'm a trans girl. I was born male, and my brain is always hurting emotionally. There's nothing I can do about it, (aside from what I'll tell you later) and the feeling is what creates the thoughts rather than the other way round. I am like this by *nature* , not nurture.
Now I will get to the weird part. When I feel masculine I become more aware of my whole body; my broad shoulders, my strong body, and my square head. And when I feel that; my brain hurts.
But when I put on a bra, or high heels, or do anything that makes me feel feminine... it stops. At least by a large amount. When I can ignore those masculine parts of me and focus my thoughts so that I feel more feminine, I feel *really good* about myself. And this isn't stemming from any conscious reasoning. I was brought up by my dad in a sporty and healthy lifestyle. I have never been abused. I always preferred hanging out with the girls. How would I describe feeling feminine for me? Giggly and sensitive. And I love it.
Once when I did succumb to my dysphoria I became internally self-destructive. I had suicidal thoughts because I would rather die than not be a girl. But I felt fine when dressed as a girl.
Google it. Keep questioning and don't rush to conclusions. Simply adapt theories. Being trans is science.
Don't have a problem with how gender is in society, that's how it evolved. Don't have a problem that gender is changing, it's evolving again.
Isn't the "boys shop on that side.. girls shop on that side" also true for clothing throughout the lives of men and women (usually)?
the thing about gender segregated toys - it reminded me of mcdonalds happy meal toys, they’re not divided based on gender but their toys are based on themes
at least 1 thing mcdonalds does right
When my kid was a 3 years old he would love to wear my makeup, specially pink eyeshadow. And I knew he was just being a 3 years old. Now he is 40 and such a handsome man.
The world is grey. Not black and white. Goes with everything else in opinions and emotions.
Gender Fluidity has formed part of my life for most part of my life ever since I was five years old, but I never really took Sexual Identity in count until just recently and that was when it all made sense to me. Ever since I was a little boy I knew that I only had attraction to girls so I considered my self Heterosexual witch most people considered ¨Normal¨. After some time when growing up and having some of my first sexual encounters I started realizing that it wasn't with just any one I could have a sexual attraction to, it needed to be some one who I would have had a relation ship with for some time, at first I just thought that it was something that had to do with my conscious or something like that, but I never told any one due to being afraid to get called gay or people thinking that I only have attractions towards people of the same sex as I, until I found out what Demisexual is. But than I thought that was weird because I only like girls, I am not gay, I can not have sex with some one that I have lot had a sentimental relation ship with, but ever since I was a kid I have always been into both female and male clothing, I would have fun playing with toy cars or barbies as well, I would´t care being called a girl or a boy, until just recently that I started watching videos about cross dressing and saw the word Gender Fluidity. that is when I started investigating about it and figured out that it is not just about attraction and gender, but the sexual Identity is not just part of who you are but the most important one.
Now for me if some one asked me what is your sex I would say Demisexual, if some one would ask me ¨but would you consider you self or preferred to be called a man or a women?¨ I would say I don't care, If they ask me ¨do you like boys or girls?¨ I would say girls. But I do really hate how for the majority of society now a days you are either straight or gay, you are either a boy or a girl, but there is never no in between or that your identity will also influence on your sexual orientation. I could either dress as a boy or as a girls one day but that doesn't mean I likes boys, I could like girls but that doesn't mean that I am going to bang the very first women that I see, but due to that mentality some time people have to hide who they really are because they are afraid to be bullied, picked on or even taken out of their comfort zone.
Thanks for this thoughtful post, THORDOX.
fivesistersfilms Your Welcome, it is actually a pleasure.
I relate to all you said..
The issue here isn't about what gender you are, it's about you clinging to stereotypes, and ironically thinking those stereotypes change your identity.
This is really brave, and changed the way I look at things. Nicely done.
Aside from the title, WOW! finally ONE person who could explain all of that in a clear and visual way!! cudos to you !
And I say this because in part we do hold on to some guilt when it comes to people not understanding things. I always say and feel that it's a two way street and the speaker also has the responsability of expressing themselves in a vidid and also for the listenser understanable way.
Now, I don't think this message will spread a lot, sadly, mainly because aside from everything she just said, we are raised into judeo-christian belief system. That is, aside from all the -slavery is ok, especially if it's your wife- and -gays shall burn in hell, even though literally nowhere in the Bible does it say so- etc.. above ALL of this, judeo-christian belief lies upon one single principle: the world and everything is built upon 0's and 1's, that is a dualistic approach, e.g. "good bad" and so on. The language itself proves what I'm saying, we also have ultimate comparisons like "the best" of which could only ever be just ONE. Now that is beyond sad, depressing and just the thought of it makes me want to kill myself, because really what's the point if there is only one "za best"?
So my point is, going from 0's and 1's it will be really hard for people, who thus eventually become so hardwired, to suddently say no, the world is made up of many many ingredients. Say we learn this in chemistry and any mildly educated adult won't have a problem with this. But then, try to tell any adult that the whole of the Universe is literally made up of just only two opposite elements and you will probably get the same reaction, say, republicans would have to this video :))
Thanks for your comment, @whizkid. And I really agree on your point about a dualistic approach being too simplistic and ultimately damaging; in fact, I just did another TEDx Talk on acknowledging complexity, and the idea of the world not being a binary system!
Fantastic presentation, really resonated with me.
She's woke for a straight cis white middle aged American mother but she still has some stuff about the community to learn.
+RapunxelDelano Hi there -- thanks for engaging in the discussion. My first reaction was wishing you would refrain from the labelling, because it's so complicated once we all start doing that (of course, you don't really know me or my story, so that's where all the "judging a book" issues become problematic when it's about gender/sex/sexuality, because that's what people DO -- label based on what they think they see at a glance). Labeling anyone can be damaging and can close down options (I think you'd agree), so I hope you'll consider that we're all one community -- or should be. Let's work toward that. All my best -- Gabrielle
Oh, no...
wow. troll
I think you have more to learn about science and biology.
Kyler - that comment was too far mate, too far in any circumstance. the entire pitch was about acceptance and then changing the world, and then you say that ?? you sound like the one who is unaware to me. stop being a bully, right now.
Hi;
Thanks for the insight Gabrielle.
I'm TS (post op). I knew at 3 years old. At 50 I transitioned (born 1955) and I am extremely happy, accepted and successful.
And WOW I had no idea this was so complicated.
I thought Computers were tough but being Human is right 'out there'.
I'm going to stay being "me" and hope it all works out...which it is. :D
Life is a Beach (and i can say that cause it's my last name)
Steph
PS funny in one thing that at 16:00 in the talk i saw the word "Hope" flash.
When I was 4 I asked my older brother if a boy could be turned into a girl.
My brother, reluctantly says ".....yes..."
And the word that flash so vibrantly in my mind was "Hope!"
:)
They call gender the ever changing moods of human beings. A new name for an old thing.
I came here for genuine help with what to do about my slight (forming) genderfluid dysphoria, but hey, nice video I guess...
yeah same
😅
Sorry, @Talyn Birky, but I didn't have any control over the title to the talk. I'm just seeing this, so it is long after you posted -- I wish the best for you & that you find strong love and support in this 'one wild and precious life,' as poet Mary Oliver calls it.
Excellent…thanks so much for sharing!!!
How about if you disagree and keep it to yourself? Unless it impinges on your well-being, it's not a problem for you. Seeing two guys walking down the street doesn't hurt you in any way except you think it's wrong. So look the other way. Isn't one of the tenets of Christianity to judge not lest ye be judged? When one tends to one's own life one is happier than when one keeps looking over the fence and condemning someone else's life.
Wouldn’t you love the little boy to get the pink sparkly shoes?
Warrendoe ...no.
Yes absolutely
@@Sirenadeldia why not?
@@asimplehuman2177 if you don't realize how brain washing this narrative is by yourself, there is nothing i can tell you about it.
@@Sirenadeldia the boy literally wanted to wear those shoes, it makes them happy, so why not?
Didn't know exactly what to expect watching this but I found it very interesting
IS HE GAY OR EUROPEAN
ITS HARD TO GUARANTEE
Nix he's right European tv if you see 2 men next to each other know that they are about to kiss poor us it's like watching thriller for the first time even if it's a girl being kissed you analysis hard if she's a woman before you change channels kissing on tv is not like before it's scary I don't need my psychologist I'm good just change channels and worse a boy in a music show was kissing his colleague French looooong kiss
The proof it's European tv as if it's not enough in a children program 2 little bodies have one bed and the other was looking for the watch in the bedroom on the bed I was shocked what if my child asks why do they have only one bed? They should have been in jail for attempt of brain molestation children have each one bed.
@@nadianjiba7667 Its a musical reference not an actual question
@@fox5079 WELL HEY DONT LOOK AT ME
@@redacted5078 I'm out why are you writing go find your inner elsewhere music or not.
11:44:"...their hormones respond differently to estrogen or testosterone..."
This is nonsense.
The one objection I would have is the scale on sexual attraction. It misses the people who are attracted neither to men nor women.
I feel like this is more of a talk about Drag. I love the look into Columbus drag because I am a performer myself, but yeah this doesn't fall into what the title of the video suggests.
the clothing is in different sections by genderbecayse the changing rooms are.
I still can't understand how gender and biological sex are not related. Supposedly, gender isn't related to sex, but every time someone refers to a gender it's based on how masculine or feminine someone presents themselves as being regardless of biological sex. Then, people talk about how sexual preference doesn't factor into gender either. But, you can like or find whomever sexually attractive if you want. Then, people say, that your clothes, your appearance, nor your choice in hobbies, material goods, or whatever don't factor into your gender versus biological sex. Supposedly, it's all about what you feel... If that's the case, why can't all of these things factor into how one identifies in their own bodies as whatever sex they were born with, to include intersex...?
I'm noticing a lot of the dogma slingers are the same users on each of these talks. You know, they say what you hate the most reflects the clearest because you see a part you deny. Is there something you need to address?
Also the book "So Sexy So Soon" by Diane E. Levin and Jean Kilbourne -- @jeankilbourne and dianeelevin.com/sosexysosoon.
Almost clickbait but love the presentation
Now add the romantic spectrum. Things only get fruitier ♥️🧡💛💚💙💜
I love that birthday cake ;) Mad props to you and your family!
Thanks! :)
The amount of /r/thathappened in this video is staggering.
+Jaseeka Rawr Can you expand? Thanks for being involved in the conversation.
She is awesome.
*Delusional.
I was a little disappointed in the lack of actual talk of gender fluidity. It's a good segue into gender topics though.
The term "gender fluidity" implies that gender is all socially constructed. This is the impression you are giving, as if it were the default condition. Ignoring the "nature vs nurture" argument, by assuming a priori that there is no connection between anatomical sex and gender, makes this whole speech rather meaningless. Also, the distinction between gender identity and gender roles is blurred here.
I appreciate your comment, yet I disagree & want to write, because you're obviously a thinking, engaged person. I feel you missed something in the listen -- the entire *point* of my talk is about "the distinction between gender identity and gender roles" -- it is about taking our ideas OF gender roles, and breaking that down to look at the bone-structure beneath. Additionally, a major point in the talk is about how there IS biology, and then other elements that feed into this. The line of biological sex is *exactly* about the nature part of ourselves, & showing how it is separate from nurture. Indeed, it's fundamental to consider what that means and how it plays into our ideas of gender roles (as distinct from gender identity -- which is discussed in the talk with the three parallel lines, and adding Sam Killerman's Genderbread image to address a further category that can clarify). As a side note regarding the "gender fluidity" term, TEDx chooses the talk titles and how they label it on youtube and in programs. That said, I don't agree with you that it implies social construction, because it has nothing to say about biology or society -- it's just bringing up an idea of non-binary thinking when it comes to "gender."
I agree with fivesistersfilms. The whole "nature vs nurture" argument is a false dichotomy since nature and nurture, gender and biology intersect in so many places. They are not mutually exclusive. Yet, they represent a broad spectrum.
Talker makes sense until toward the end of the video where she explains terms and then deviates from her own definitions.
1) Biological sex: boy ..... girls
2)Sexuality: Homosexual ..... Heterosexual
3)Gender (fine, if you stick with this definition of gender, this is fine): Masculinity ..... Femininity
There are in betweens where people might fall: for 1) developmental anomalies before/after birth; 2) bisexuality, a straight person sometimes attracted to a same sex person; 3) the specter of femininity and masculinity is quite broad, obviously, since a man can be feminine, a woman can be masculine to varying degrees, nobody denies this.
I don't disagree with any of the above.
She then says: at 13:51"On forms, you will often see gender as a substitute for the biological sex"
Let me get this straight... You are saying that forms that clearly mean to register your biological sex are using the term 'Gender' as a substitute for that? Considering that 'Gender' means exactly that: biological sex, in dictionaries and common language, and in grammar (where I am aware there's a neutral gender, that's not pertinent in this discussion though, unless the form is a grammar test -.- )
You mean to say that a word that means something is being used meaning that thing?!!! Enough sarcasm in text.
She goes on to explain that gender is fluid, all the while using the gender definition as clarified above: feminity and masculinity, referring to how people can be feminine and masculine to varying degrees. Yes, she is explaining something that has been figured out for many, many years among human societies. People can be a combo of sexuality, varying degrees of straightness and gayness, while also being a combo of varying degrees of masculinity and femininity. What lie between the biological sex binary are small percentiles of people with birth defects, some more serious than others, some easy to overcome, others not so much and it's a struggle and I hope medicine and psychology evolve enough to be able to help everyone affected by these anomalies effectively. So the variation when it comes to biological sex is not as common as the variation in between straight and gay sexualities. Meaning more people fall somewhere in between straight and gay than they do between the female sex and the male sex at birth. And more people fall somewhere between femininity and masculinity than they do between being straight and being gay. And there is no relationship between where people fall on the sexuality spectrum and where they fall on the feminity and masculinity spectrum. She says this, I agree. There is nothing groundbreaking here!
Why are you deciding that gender (as defined above, being the spectrum of masculinity and femininity) is the same as biological sex?! If you acknowledge that gender, as you have defined it, is not biological gender then why is this news or somehow worth a TED Talk? Why are you surprised that things that have been produced mostly specifically for women and most of them have withstood the test of time (makeup and high heels for example) are marketed to women and why are you surprised that companies would do anything to hit their target public in marketing and design products specifically targeted to kids by gender? Is there a ban on girls buying soldier toys? Do you really believe that your kids are such blank slates that they base their entire identities and tendencies on where their toys and clothes come from inside a store? Of course not.
Why am I even bothering with this comment? Short point is: How can you make a better world for your kids when you're confusing basic, common words yourself? How can you think that raising every little word choice and marketing choice to the status of determining factor in a child's 'gender' (as you have defined it, masculinity and femininity spectrum) is a good idea? Even taking every little thing, bundled together, turning it into a powerful white noise, humming into their ears, molding them from the inside once they internalize those ideas, how can you think that 'changing the world' is the solution? The world changes all right, but only sometimes for the better and it often comes with harmful ripple effects, because of consequences we cannot foresee.
Stop trying to change the world and start trying to raise strong kids, kids with the necessary tools to deal with the world and with themselves and their own issues. Make your kids strong enough to deconstruct the voices they have internalized from childhood to adulthood. Help them understand themselves and they will understand the world better and adapt to it and be truly happy in it (at least for a while) and they'll be tough enough to live in it, in spite of it.
I started addressing the talker as if she'd be the one reading this comment... She's not... but I'll say this one more thing: She starts off describing her disillusionment at herself and at the world when she grew up. Everyone goes through that. Some get stuck there, trying to solve the mystery of: "Why aren't things as my 12 year old mind had imagined them, six years ago?" So they eventually get to thinking: "It's not that my expectations were faulty, it's that the world is faulty in feeding me this stuff and being totally different! Hypocrite world! Let's change it!" When all they have to do is: "Hey, I was off by a lot. Let's see what I am really like... Let's see what I am really good at, what I am really capable of. Let's find out more about the world and why things are the way they are. Let's be mature about this and take our time, analyze and admit that our ego is smashed, our hopes have died... But I'll get through this. I have no other choice. Why be stuck whinning about things for more time than it's healthy to do so?" My hypothetical monologs suck XD But hopefully they get the point across.
Hi +niassera -- I did read this, and I think your conclusions are based on a misunderstanding of what I said about the spectrum and the definition and misuse of the word gender. Maybe watch again to listen to the complexity of the topic and what I'm actually saying? As you know, nothing can, of course, be fully covered in 17 minutes, so I was careful to bring up elements of the complexity for further discussion and research by people on their own, also aiming to include all the range of experience and diversity of people. One other note -- you use a tone of contempt and dismissiveness which seems surprising, given your clear interest in talking about complexity; everyone is human and these are discussions to have with respect -- with a goal of exchanging ideas, because otherwise, it's just people talking AT each other or into the ether. If indeed you end up having a strong different idea about the topic and some good food for thought to add to the field, you should consider pitching a TEDx Talk -- it's quite an experience to cull down a complex idea to 17 minutes and try to cover a lot of discussion through telling a story, and a worthy endeavor to put oneself out there in the world and offer an idea of food for thought. I appreciate your interest and passion, and thanks for thinking about this and trying to be part of the discussion of an important topic.
I'm happy to hear you actually read my comment.
Here's my reply for all it's worth:
If my conclusions are based on a misunderstanding of what you said about the spectrum and the definition and misuse of the word gender then my conclusions may be wrong. But after watching the video again I can safely say that we are speaking 2 different languages. I assume people have the common sense to raise their kids as strong, responsible people and not force gender stereotypes on them, and that the way items are organised in a shop won't determine how a child would eventually perceive their own identity. You assume that people can't help but raise their kids as either a boy or a girl stereotype and that the way the world seems to split and segregate boys and girls reinforces stereotypes. Truth should be there, somewhere in the middle.
This is a non-issue. This gender debate and the idea of gender fluidity, it's not a real problem that can be solved. You can talk about it and you can make unicorns and gingerbread people to explain sex, gender identity, sexuality, but you're only making things worse and more complicated than they need to be. By 'you' here I do mean you and everyone else arguing for gender fluidity and teaching children this.
Let me put it another way: There's boys, and girls. Any inbetween biologically is suffering from a biological abnormality in fetus development and is not an in-between sex, or a third gender. The normal biological sexes are boy and girl. There's gay and straight, and there may be some who lean and swing in-between, but the normal, majority sexuality is straight. People who are gay, should be free to be gay and should have all the rights that straight people have, but sexuality in general and gay sexuality especially are not something one would or should wish to discuss with children (younger than 13), yet the gender fluid activists are pushing to discuss sexuality with children in schools, which is not all right imo. Gender expression is first of all cultural. Second of all historical and thirdly, it's personal and volatile - it can change as often as you change socks. Gender expression is fashion. Gender identity, according to gender fluidity activists (you seem to be one of them, although a mild one), is a spectrum between feminine and masculine. Gender and biological sex have different definitions according to these activists but are often used as if to mean the same thing. For instance: Gender on forms (your example) does not refer to gender identity. Nobody on a form cares about how feminine or masculine you are, or you 'feel' you are... that day, because, who know? it's fluid, it can change. Gender on forms always refers to sex, biological sex of which you can be one of two (birth defects are not biological sexes). Gender in language, as in 'he' or 'she' - these refer to biological sex or how one appears/presents themselves (gender expression) of which there can only be two: boy or girl. What are your thoughts on neutral pronouns?
People these days, they are afraid to say the simple truth: Humans are either males or females, they are normally (meaning generally, in an overwhelming majority) heterosexual, and they generally adhere to certain societal expectations that have been born and continue to change as a result of human biology, human environment, history, and material possibilities (as in science, technology and quality of life). Intersex people are very unfortunate and need help, both physically and psychologically, and in Western society I am sure they are better off than in other countries. They suffer from birth defects and do not represent nature's way of saying: "Look! Biological sex is on a spectrum, don't be so uptight and don't think there are only 2 genders!" Homosexuals are not only a minority but also do not represent a natural, normal inclination in humans, because otherwise, humans would die off. Homosexuals are exceptions and yes, we need to learn to live with them and Western societies have done the best job at that, accepting homosexuality and offering freedom and human rights - this is great. Gender expression: feminine, masculine - well, obviously this is a spectrum and it's volatile. It's fashion.
It's stereotypical roles vs non-stereotypical roles, which evolve and change. But you know, generally, females make good moms, nurturing, compassionate, orderly, agreeable. And males, generally, make good dads, firm, aggressive defenders, strict, cool-headed, responsible. And in reality there are all sorts of moms and all sorts of dads and even if there are general types, the particulars will always differ in intensity and combination. But that's fine, the roles don't change much.
The more you live the more you learn, right? So everyone should be encouraged to learn a little more about themselves and others. Stereotypes should be challenged ( we humans love doing that). But trying 'to change the world' by messing around with useful notions and turning them useless because there are some exceptions to the rule, that's like playing with fire. Pretty soon when a child asks their mom: "Why do you put on makeup?" The mom will freeze in contemplation of the meaning of makeup, gender expression and gender stereotypes. And if that kid is a girl, then be sure to mention that she's not obligated to wear makeup and that she can choose not to wear it and if the kid is a boy, be sure to explain that if they wish they can wear makeup when they're older and that some boy wear makeup.... And in the meantime, some kids somewhere are bullying another kid because... he's wearing shit clothes and is poor. Guess the biological gender of those kids? Guess the gender role they are expressing? Guess their sexual orientation? You can't? Good. Because it doesn't matter. This is a non-issue. The combinations and possibilities of expressing one's gender and of expressing femininity or masculinity are as endless as are the combinations of personality in humans. Biological sex=biological gender = boy or girl. Assumptions about biological gender?! So what? Humans always make assumptions. You guys, trying to change the world one confused definition at a time can only succeed in confusing future generations. Already there are many who think they are neither male nor female.
I can't keep a straight argument about this, most likely because I have too many ideas and virtually no debating experience. I tend to talk AT people because I have that sort of shitty personality. Sorry.
It's just seems so foolish to me, from where I stand (not in a Western society!) that there's a bunch of activists trying to split hairs and explain the most common sense things in the most uncommon ways, dress it all up in good intentions and then let it loose upon young kids' minds. I understand how difficult it is to raise a kid for the society he/she will be a part of - you want to make sure they have the tools and abilities necessary to survive and succeed. But turning 'gender' into this whole mess only does kids harm. You (the Westerners) are taking 'logical' conclusions to a whole level, beyond reasonableness: boys and girls are the same biologically (the biological sex is the only difference), hence they start out with the same gender, we split them into boys and girls, biology and hormones have nothing to do with this (and if you say they do, then boys and girls are not biologically the same are they and there would be different tendencies, wouldn't there?), women can do whatever men can do and vice-versa (but women can't pass certain physical trails, men can, and men can pass certain psychological trails, women can, imo) society determines gender? Now, I realise you've personally not gone into all that non-sense and you've kept it real for the most part. But really, you're pulling at non-issues from where I am standing: fashion choices for boy and girls? Lego choices for boys and girls? Lack of equal representation of boy, and girl lego people in boy's sets? A dentist who's trying to be polite and just goes with platitudes and assumes generalities about your baby? (he's not making actual life rules for your kid, he's just being polite and trying to be pleasant and sympathetic with you, the mom. He's not presenting his -omg! he might be a woman dentist! Such important stuff there... He's not presenting his opinions of boys and girls, he's assuming your expectations of your boy or girl. He thinks it's pleasing for a mom to learn she's given birth to a boy that will be strong, healthy, physical, athletic and the same goes for the girl. The fact that your girl asked: How do you know it's a man?... Well, yes. That's a valid question. It's a detective's sort of question. It's not a groundbreaking thing, I'm sorry to say. You may have been assuming it had been a male thief. You may have been surprised at the fresh possibility: What if it was a woman thief? It's not a groundbreaking thing. And you assuming it had been a male, or speaking as if you had assumed that (using the 'he' instead of she) is not a general statement about the male gender - it's just how you saw it at the moment. Had you been speaking another language you'd have found other means to express his assumed gender, or not. My own native languge doesn't allow for 'lack of gender' or gender neutral expression when you speak to or about someone. It's all either feminine or masculine form. Assuming someone's gender may mean assuming possibilities for said gender (sex, yes, gender here is sex. It's always sex! In my language, there's no difference, by the way. Gender means biological sex, it's what you're assuming when you're imagining someone unknown in a certain position. You don't assume their gender expression or sexual orientation or gender identity, you always assume biological sex, that's the only clear thing that can be known and assumed), so it may mean assuming the thief is most likely a man. So? It probably is most likely a man. It doesn't mean it can't be a woman. Assuming something is not a political statement. Assumptions are assumptions. And teaching people to not assume or to assume everything or to assume the opposite of what they'd normally assume is unnatural. Assumptions come to be from culture, experience, history, knowledge, wishful thinking, expectations, etc and are not the same with prejudice.
Ok. I'll shut up now. I am probably going about this all roundabouty and weird like. I am not a debater, nor am I the best person to explain such things. Just to conclude: it's a non-issue. It's not a real problem. It's in your head. It's in everyone's head and it will never go away because people will always assume things, generalities will always exist, stereotypes will always be there, we think and process the world, ourselves and those around us in a very generalised, narrow way because our attention is limited and we are human. Even when we are being inclusive we are being exclusive and our categorizations have a point to them when we exclude something from that category, and we are prone to put other people in certain categories and other people in other categories. You cannot change the world, you cannot change how humans think, the methods and means of creating and defining types. You can broaden certain views and you can dismantle certain wrong assumptions, but don't attack the core, the reality, in this case: two genders (yes biological!), different and complex people, but only two genders. Exceptions? Yes, there may be! Do exceptions change the way a category is defined? No, unless you're doing math. Exceptions are exceptions.
I realise it was no small task to come up with this talk and I personally could never do it, aside from the language issue. But frankly, it's still nothing new or particularly useful, it resembles the way certain activists for gender fluidity are trying to muddy the waters and it's not bringing anything new to an age old issue: girls can be not very girly and boy can be not very manly, and the society expects certain gender expressions and roles and actions of the boy and others of the girl - only they don't because you live in a place where a boy can wear a dress and kiss another boy and be girly and not get grief about it. You live in a place where you can be gay and trans and happy! You complain about how merchandise is displayed in a store and how boy and girls are split into boys and girls. No such thing as a gender-neutral society and if there ever will be it would make for a very odd dystopia. Really think about it... Or don't.
That was a reaalllyy good ending.
As the mother of five sons, it never bothered me if they played with toys that traditionally were “girl’s toys”. And as I grew up, I was a “tomboy”. It’s just that back then, we didn’t call it anything special-we were just kids. We didn’t make a big deal. These days any and everything gets big media attention whether it needs it or not! It’s quite ridiculous. I love “Ted Talks”, but I just wish they wouldn’t make a big deal about half of the things like this that just don’t need to have an entire talk about it. It’s just life...
Exactly that's why ppl shouldn't care about what kids play with, they're Kids let them enjoy it
It's interesting how so many people who decide to espouse concepts like gender and genderfluidity have no background in biology, medicine or psychology. Rather they are filmmakers, musicians, politicians or people who have studied the humanities.
Seriously, do you really expect something worthwhile out of this presentation, beyond the interesting aspects the personal life of an individual might have? Why does someone who has no background in studying sexuality, physiology and psychology, have any more insight in this than a carpenter? It's therefore not surprising that she actually doesn't say anything more than what you can hear in any other presentation on the subject.
There are people who are born with incomplete sets of genitalia, there seem to be people who are transsexual, there seem to be asexual people. (I chose this phrasing because we actually know very little about those things.)Those comprise not even 1% of the general population. There are different summaries that highlight how many people are homosexual or bisexual and estimates vary from 5-10%. There is a spectrum of sexual behavior regarding the choice of partners. The other side is that a "binary" view on the sexes is perfectly legitimate because the other 95% generally do not fit the groups mentioned before.
Marketing is a good example for that. Companies do not force you to buy their products and they monitor very heavily what consumers want. Consumers do not behave the way they do because advertisements tell them to or companies mold them. It is the other way round. Companies and their advertising only exaggerate what we already want because they compete for sales that we voluntarily engage in. The result are "binary" strategies of marketing, that are highly successful because almost all of humanity fits that binary.
Maybe gender isn't "male" or "female" but for most of humanity that generalisation actually fits any practical consideration.
Those statistics are the most "factual" proof that I have seen so far that disproves this "new-age" hype.
This is indeed a very poor reasoning and a quite insensitive one. Going along the line of "simplicity", we could have stayed with the two-drawer divide frome the cave ages; either you're able to survive or you die, nothing in-between, no medicine, no emergency services, no fire fighters, no pyschologists, etc.
The couplet about marketing is the very example of biased reference, with heavy self-looped-back retroaction: my society is getting more violent, therefore, I offer kids weapons as toys, and I sell weapons and fences to adults. Looks great to make a marketing (or law-making or city regulation) policy indulging towards less violence in the cities!
Moreover, from science point of view, what is indeed really interesting (any real high level scientist will tell you so) is not what gets the model confirmed but what /may/ indicate that the model needs to be revisited. Of course, science or scientific approach is of no interest for "any practical consideration"...
Not true. I had 5 sons born 1984-1993. One of my sons preferred pink and playing with girl and typical girl play (except when he invented weapons.) Another one dressed up as princesses and took ballet. They're all secure, hetero males.
+Muriel Hykes Hi Muriel -- thanks for the comment. What do you mean by "not true"? The point is that boys should be able to play with any type of toy -- that toys and clothes ideally wouldn't be labeled as "girl" OR "boy" but just "toys" and "clothes" -- maybe as "trucks and cars" and "dolls" or "pants" and "scalloped sleeved shirts"… you get the idea. And ALL of this has nothing to do with sexuality. That's the whole point of my talk -- but most people do associate clothes or toys with sexual preference, rather than realizing they are not connected. All best -- Gabrielle
Not all of us pushed children into stereotypical toys. I was taught that the difference between boys and girls was a result of societal pressures and expectations. I tried to turn my boys into nurturing, sweet, non-violent creatures. Oh, I have stories, believe me!
@@manzilla48 what?
If only people focused on things that matter, most of our REAL problems would be gone by now.
We don't have to worry about the way Toys-R-Us separates their toys anymore...R.I.P. T.R.U
Yes, please people, stop referring to all animals as 'He'!!!
Though this is talking mainly about gender and its expression, genderfluid isnt a concept that just been made up recently by tumblr. Genderfluid may just seem to be because of the recent craze of tumblr cringe of kids saying inaccurate and dumb things.
So where did it come from?
kuroichan101 You're right. Expressions of gender fluidity have been clear throughout human history! If only people did their research.... so many I'll-informed comments with a complete lack of empathy and understanding here. It's very sad to see. :(
As the one and only now sadly departed Hitch would say BABBLE do not buy any pencils for her tin cup!
The thing is that spectrums don't really accurately represent these aspects of people's personal identification (aside from biological sex) spectrums are too two dimensional, and exclude people who fall outside of the area between the bianaries
+Annie Elliott Hi Annie -- I find this such an engaging comment, and I'd like to hear more of what you mean. I will be talking more about this, when my film comes out this upcoming year, and I am interested to hear how I can represent the idea or visual model differently, if its makes more sense and will be more inclusive. Thanks -- Gabrielle
What is the chosen title for your film? Was it "the happiest day in his life"?
I had that same swing set......
I am gender fluid. I hate it when people can’t keep up (he/her/they).
So, I can tell you how I feel but if someone else sees me differently, do offend them by forcing them to see you the way you want to be seen? Doesn’t seem very tolerant😂
What about asexuality?
That's a sexuality, not a gender.
Asexually exist. Its outside the spectrum of sexuality. If you are talking about agender then that would be outside too.
+Anal Master It does exist. Some people just arent attracted to a sex by physical appearances.
Some people have mental conditions that prevent pleasure from sex.
Has little to do with gender roles. But still dunked on for some unfathomable reason?
Not quite what I thought this was going to be about, but I like it anyway.
Hmmm, I am not hearing the gender fluidity. This sounds more like binary constructs, she even said that when talking about her son and wanted the bright colored shoes and socialized society. Wrong title for sure.
+April Chartrand (AC) Agreed, April, about the title (no control over it). Let me know more about your ideas for models and representation that would reflect beyond the binary (my goal), as I'll be doing more talks this upcoming year with the film. Thanks -- Gabrielle
+fivesistersfilms www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/06/17/ruby-rose-gender-fluid-video-interview_n_7603186.html Ruby Rose breaks down the fluidity. It is not a fixed binanry construct was presented you your presentation. The a wide axis of feelings, identity, gender preference (or preference can change over time), and partner selection might change over time depending on the dynamics of the relatioship. Some folks that are fluid anre asexual or gender non-confirmeing (gender variant). What you lecture presented was not in keeping with the title. Very misleading. nonbinary.org/wiki/Genderfluid here is a site that explains some of the details of what is called Genderfluid. Homework time.
Yup
For more info on the shout-outs in this talk, check out:@GDIGM @MaskYouLiveIn @RepresentPledge @JenSiebelNewsom facebook.com/TheMaskYouLiveIn itspronouncedmetrosexual.com/2012/03/the-genderbread-person-v2-0/ facebook.com/MetroSam
kingsqueensinbetweens.com
facebook.com/KingsQueensInBetweens
www.fivesisters.com
Gabrielle Burton: I have a five-year-old boy and a six-year-old girl and they are the most intelligent, perfect, fabulous extraordinary, inspiring, creative little creatures on the planet, of course, that's a fact. That's a little ambitious wouldn't you say? Sounds like every parent I've ever had the misfortune of meeting and made the grave mistake of asking if they have children of their own. They instantly dive into a self-worshiping spiral that quickly becomes embarrassing and annoying to all within earshot, let's wait a decade or two before you start passing your offspring as the best thing since sliced bread and crowning them as ''inspiring or creative''. I hate to burst your bubble, but the truth is, most will be mediocre to average at best.
Great initiative and it will definitely make people think but there are a few mistakes in there.
+Kezzie Recaps Hi Kezzie -- I'm interested to hear your thoughts & input, as I will be giving more talks connected with the film in the upcoming year. It's always hard to cover EVERYTHING (impossible, really), and people disagree on many aspects -- still I'm definitely am open to thoughts as to how to make the language, the points, or the visual models more inclusive or representative. Thanks so much -- Gabrielle
It's always great to see people wanting to learn! It's been a while since I've seen your talk now, but as I now quickly go through the video again, I get to minute 11 and that is where it really gets binary (both terms and explanation). I definitely recommend Ashley Mardell 's ABCs of LGBT series if you want to get more information on gender, sexuality, etc. I know it is difficult to explain everything at once, it's basically bombarding people with information. I know it is hard but even if you're not including all possibilities, I find it useful to let people know that what you're talking about is only a little piece of the spectrum. Again, thank you for asking for input.
Very fluid indeed.
For a second I thought she would've said, "...there is many more than 50 shades of grey..." Lmao
Don't define yourself by your gender it's non sense... Gay, bisexual, lesbians are more than that label. They are also professionals, brothers, sisters, friends, etc..
The male and female social construct just makes things simple, why try to complicate things? Look I'm starting to understand the argument the more I look into it, but at the end of the day, the only reason I see to dismiss gender roles would be to let a cross dressers feel more comfortable in society.
*****
//Here's the trouble: we don't separate "masculine" from "male" and "feminine" from "female".//
There's really no need to, when i walk down the street and see a female, I would expect her to be feminine, if she is not, then so be it... and that's that...
//We expect all males to act in ways that have been arbitrarily labeled masculine, and we expect all females to act in ways that have been arbitrarily labeled feminine.//
Yup, and it's not a big deal, If my presupposition is wrong, then the fabric of space and time still seem to be in tact,
//And then when people don't conform to this expectation, as inevitably they don't, we get angry with the person for it.//
actually, majority of males are masculine, and majority of females are feminine, and if by chance we encounter the minority male whom is feminine, then so what? I'm not going to get angry...you're just assuming everyone who see's a feminine male gets angry....where are your numbers to support this? In fact i'd say most people probably don't care.
//It should be okay for a man to take care of children, or a woman to not want children: just to give an example.//
you claim that it "should be okay" but actually It is okay!!! it's NOT against the law, the reality is people are FREE to express themselves, and the issue HERE IS you're not trying to change a law, you're trying to enforce your opinions on others...just because YOU THINK it's okay for men to cross dress doesn't mean I HAVE TO.
People try to equivocate racism and gender roles....but there is a big issue, racism was in the law, however, gender roles are just opinions...therefore there is no issue for people to have their own opinions. So your point is pointless.
+Parthalam Lancer
You say we should take action because "people get harassed" but you provided no evidence to support your claim...while I agree gay people probably do get harassed by some, as long as it's not physical contact then this "harassment" you speak of is probably just someone exercising free speech...the fact is people get harassed every day for different reasons...but this is just one of the many out comes that come with freedom of speech
*****
While this is a comment section, that isn't a valid excuse to not back your claim. You obviously felt the need to reply and give your view on the issue or to correct. If that is so, you either are doing it because you can;'t control yourself or you hope to sway people's minds and possibly educate them. If you're going to argue on the issue of the video or anything else, using rhetoric to get people to understand your view and possibly change their mind is what you should always so.
Would you not agree you would do better that way? I don't think you need to use 200 sources, but backing a claim might make your case rather than just a baseless opinion which really becomes a fruitless one.
*****
an argument brought forth with not evidence will be dismissed without evidence....but referring to your experience, i'm sorry that happened...and many guys do expect women to not have armpit hair, and you are free to grow it if you wish, but please don't complain because people think it's weird you have it, it is simply just an opinion.
PREACH NIGGA PREACH!!
My one criticism is that at the end she said its "not all black or white" and I know that she meant that in a figurative manner, but she literally left out concepts of intersectionality around, uh--RACE along with gender-ex/bio-sex/sexuality, and how that factor affects the others in how people are treated socially. Just sayin.
Thanks for this input; you're right @TUXYguardian, I couldn't include everything and was hoping that the implying that hint about race too would open up further conversations. (beyond 17 minutes!) These are important things to talk about -- lots more complexity to address and acknowledge, and I appreciate your making this comment.
at what moment did she ever say the word genderfluid?
ACESUALITY AND AGENDER
WILL WE STOP TALKING ABOUT GENDER FROM A SOCIAL STANDPOINT AND START TALKING ABOUT IT FROM A SCIENTIFIC STANDPOINT? THERE IS ACTUAL BIOLOGICAL SCIENCE BEHIND BEING TRANS, AND PEOPLE ARE OVERLOOKING THAT FACT SO DAM MUCH.
She's so cute. AWWEEE lmao learning!
When I was a little boy, I used to play with my mom's old barbies. Mainly because we were poor and I had no toys.
There were good points, but the structure was weird
Finally someone who knows the real definition of Gender Fluidity! !!!!!
👊👊👊👊👊👊👊👊👊
Excuse me how
+Nice Cream Guy
Just kidding. Gender Fluidity is fake. It's all in the head.
Just look at CopperCab.
32SQUID -_- kk
+32SQUID saying that something people identify as is fake or invalid is really insensitive. In a lot of cases, being gender fluid is something that is hard to come to terms with, and to have people say that it is not a real thing is just hurtful. Besides, the talker herself said that the use of the word gender fluid in the title was not her doing and not appropriate.
+Tove Kauppi
Nobody is gender fluid. Male or female.
Yes, but the USA is in chronic debt and has serious divisions. There is nothing new under the sun and the reason that people in the past came up with the social structures was because it produced a fixed sense of social duty, and it seemed to work to make the national body strong. Societies are like bodies. We now have a cultural suicide happening.
hey! she stole my name
6:05.... like you and me... WRONG WORD !
What word--"me"? In this particular instance that is actually--believe it or not--still grammatically correct.
some of the audience are also crosdresser individual inside their mind
Okay all of you can be all those different shades of grey but us boys are going to be blue and the girls are going to be pink that's how it's going to be and you ain't changing it
What?
It’s Nina!!
It is so confortable go to the stores divided in sections for men and women. You dont have to go through everything to find what we are looking for. When we raise a child you show them our manners. It is the parents job to give them directions!
What does gender fluid mean anyway ?
It means your gender varies between male, female and non binary in general.
Hard to explain without explaining Disphoria
That was nina west!!
Impressive!
She's a boss.
Still in Ohio, one cannot change their gender, if that does change I might be the first in line.
Masculinity and feminist, which stipulations are used for each one are arbitrary on location and time, is somewhat fluid but also, in best terms, relative to each person. However, there are only three genders. Make, female, and intersex.
Thanks for the comment. Regarding biological sex (I prefer using "biological sex" than gender, as gender can be biology but also expression, performance, etc.), I am not sure all research would agree that there are only 3, because on a DNA level (the XX, XY, XXO, and so forth), there is a lot we are all learning about these categorizations, so I think we have to keep an open mind as to what we may find in the future regarding all these ideas and catalogings. That said, the title of "fluidity" was not mine (as I've said in the comments before), and my focus and interest is in more opening up the discussion about these elements not being binary, and not definitively assumptive... there's a lot to be discussed.
Anyone with a y chromosome is biologically male so there are only technically 2 biological sexes. Gender could mean anything from gender expression,identity, or roles. Gender is a spectrum with male or female on either side.
@kuroichan101 Thanks for being engaged in the conversation. Here's some quick info on more of the complexity on this not just being a binary definition: www.who.int/genomics/gender/en/index1.html
is the gender fluid part on another video or...