I've experienced some male privilege since transitioning, but it feels to me kind of like cisgender privilege, since so much of it is due to appearing to be cisgender instead of appearing queer.
Hmnm it's almost like everyone's experiences are unique to their own demeanor, almost seems like we shouldn't be trying to label an entire demographic with a single stroke...
I can certainly see how that would come with disadvantages, in our racist society. I'm sorry that you have to experience that. From what I've heard or seen, it sounds like being a black man could come with risk of mistreatment (or worse) from police and having other people appear to be afraid of you or suspicious of you. That's horrible. I'd be interested to hear about your experience. Do you make videos?
I'd be up to sharing by experience. I don't make videos though. I'd be open to answering some of your questions if you have anything specific or maybe writing something up. Let me know!
Attraktivness is only a small part of the reason people (most often cis-men) catcall. It is mostly to reinstate the power ratio between genders and ultimativly classes.
I think "passing privilege" is the term you're looking for here. that's more about the assumption that you're cis. cis privilege is a different thing entirely. But the whole bathroom thing is definitely a passing privilege thing. When you pass you don't have to worry about it, but when you don't it's just this whole stressful thing For me I feel like the types of sexism I've experienced, due to being perceived as female, that have affected me the most have been all fairly subtle things. Mostly not being expected to be able to do things, not taken seriously, or ignored/not listened to. These have all given me issues that I won't be able to undo just by transitioning and passing as male. I feel like this isn't really talked about. On the other hand I relate to some of what you say about not experiencing sexism because of looking masculine. I'm the same, I was never catcalled or anything like that. Although, there was a phase where I dressed fairly feminine, and I still didn't experience that. But I suppose even then I didn't wear makeup or dresses or anything so maybe that's why. I think there is a privilege in there somewhere, but I don't know if it's connected to masculinity, or simply just being able to ignore mainstream beauty standards to a certain degree.
Your experiences with housing were interesting to me. Here (in East-Central Europe), the housing market very disproportionately favors women, especially young women. It's mostly because they are believed to be cleanlier and tend to take care of the place better... I don't know.
It’s interesting to hear your struggle with public toilets before transitioning. I’m aware that this probably happened 10 years+ ago, but now days, as a mostly passing trans man myself, I don’t feel as much stress going to public toilets (I go to the female toilets because I just don’t have the guts to go to male toilets, also because I’m not out yet and women’s toilets just feels safer, since I literally look like a tiny kid), no one would really comment on anything, people might think it’s strange but they wouldn’t stare. Though I occasionally feel stressed going to toilets because I fear that people feel violated by my presence or felt that I’m a threat to their privacy, especially when I am in very masculine clothing such as a suit.
i had a shit relationship with my father growing up. i've recently reconciled with him. pay attention to the context here: fuck you. go fuck yourself. fuck you for comparing possible trauma with gender identity. seriously - go fuck yourself. quit listening to jordan peterson.
These episodes made my blood boil SO much ! I loved how the whole cast was like « HELL NO », especially with Lisa VDP being such a strong LGBT advocate … sorority wins over misogyny on that one and it felt great
Have you experienced mistrust yet? I find that if I"m wlkaing out fo a store to my car, and a woman is parked in the same area, walking ahead of me, I feel compelled to wait behind and let her go on her own ahead of me. Recently I was in a Trader Joe's parking lot, and saw a truck that had just parked had a headlight out. I headed over to tell her, nad she got back in her car and took off in a big hurry. I also see that people look uncomfortable if I look at their children too long. On the other hand, I've had female friends make a big fuss over a stranger;'s child, and they shared this wonderful women's moment together. Had I attempted the same thing, I think it wold have gone poorly. Perhaps the fact that I'm older and grew my hair out doesn't help (picture Dave Grohl).
I was the same way. Not dating and being introverted as well. But knowing that I felt weird alot. I was told to feel happy but wasn't happy because I was trans. I had to fake it . Wearing dresses to church and told I was a quiet girl. Looked like a girl but didn't feel like a girl. Now knowing my name is Shawn Xavier happy to be him now.
Thank you for making a video that actually helped me better understand what it is I feel privilege wise. I never really thought about it as cis gendered privilege vs queer , but that's exactly what I have been experiencing as well! I've tried to have conversations with my girlfriend explaining the privilege thing and I think this is a great way to explain it! I really can relate a lot to your feelings and interactions pre t and currently ! I struggle with trying to understand my thoughts and feelings a lot lately especially has I am changing and the world views me differently. And yet at times I feel the same , so this video really helped me to realize how differently people are treating me because they think I am a cis -male. Also wanted to add I felt exactly the same as you about my old name and meeting people that have never seen me before ,it was always so incredibly awkward . So glad those days are over! 😊 great video!
Thanks so much! That's interesting that you can relate so much--cool. It took me quite a while to articulate all of this (not that I articulated it perfectly here)--it's complex stuff.
We all have our strengths and weaknesses. I am very masculine, but I have aspergers (lack of intuitive social understanding). Be social. Work with people. I'll work with systems, and you, people. Do this for your own sake.
It happened to me as well... I was privileged, i was always feminin and felt accepted muchvmore in comparison to other trans people... To the point i even forgot i was trans... Until now... You do look nice...
Every time I get a hair cut, the barber asks if I’m gay (because I requested to cut my long hair short, or request for shorter and shorter hair styles), in the most recent experience, my barber asked “are you a boy or girl?”, then insists on charging me 10 more dollars because she had deciphered from my voice that I’m AFAB, hence charging the “ladies” price on me, despite having similar hair lengths to boys.
I wonder how this will influence your career in the future .In any case it seems you made the right choice for you under the given circumstances . What do you teach ? I wonder if you could go beyond your personal experience and speak about transgenders in society. I feel you make the point 5 to 10 minutes into the video and so I wish you would add a bit more content about other people whether academic or otherwise .
Crystinia El Arguioui I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't call me a male or a boy... I'd prefer to be described as a giant whacky wailing inflatable arm flailing tube being
You wonder why so many people hate you. Maybe because you're arrogant and unable to see the life of a cis white man from any perspective other than your own. They have a nice car and house, it's because they worked and earned it and the color of their skin and gender did not make it easier for them.
Not shaving legs is the only privilege you listed. Even then women ridicule other women with hairy legs. The majority of things you listed were either 'cis' privilege or just a confidence issue. And I wouldn't call conversations a privilege. Just an observation.
So all in all there isn't some secrete door of privelage in becoming a man. Trans people have some very interesting viewpoints from their unique perspective. I hope you will continue in your good work at dispelling this myth of the oppressive male patriarchy. To be honest I feel like MSM has posted with a broad brush a general perception of at least very strong dislike of all things white straight male.
Great video Slofox, thank you as always. If there's any male privilege I gained, I'm on the same boat as you; no fear about leaving my legs unshaved, easy access to bathrooms, feeling comfortable in men's sections, like for clothing shops. It's the privilege of not having to explain "I know I'm a woman, but I want a men's ____ " every time, it was just so awkward. So I know what you mean about cis privilege. It's sad because I feel like it's a very similar state as being in the closet as a gay or lesbian person, but in a twisted way because your identity is actually validated while your trans status is closeted (or is it?). It's no wonder people are obsessed with passing. I'm always obsessively thinking about how much of my dysphoria is resulting from society (my environment) rather than just the condition of being trans in itself. I know it's impossible to really tell (since I only know of my existence in this current society), but nonetheless. I'm also pretty lucky and have been accepted generally everywhere for being trans, and I am also working at a white-collar job and am half white, half Japanese. Only place I'm getting "what the hell" reactions and sometimes snide remarks are from doctors, so that's been my biggest stress. Saddening because it's such clear evidence that doctors, who should be the least judgmental of all people, are indeed judging. I haven't changed my name to a male name yet, so I also fear getting the "you're not what I expected!" surprised reaction. But I don't get it too much. I'm sort of thinking about keeping my female name but honestly I wish I can find a multi cultural name that is unisex. It's been challenging finding something I like. Anyway, it's always a pleasure watching your videos, looking forward to your future ones.
Shopping for clothes is another great example of privilege or things just being easier. That's awful that some doctors have been rude to you--so horrible. Some doctors are just not nice--it's not what you'd expect. I hope you find a good name for yourself! :)
Don't get me wrong here, but no one goes through life without some kind of stigma hold against you - cis m/k, queer ect. Is it really a privilege not to have to shave your legs? Sounds awful little to care about. Standing up to take a piss would be a privilege too then? I think it is a privilege to have a life without being bullied, being seriously crippled, living in a western society. To make everything about privileges, will dilute every privileges. Differences is ok. I can't have babies, and that is ok. Is it a privilege to have the possibility to be pregnant? We are just different, everyone is. You just moved closer to how you wanted to be objectified as a person.
+Mira - Good catch! Yes, I have noticed as everyone ages, they become more and more insignificant in society. And, that is added to whatever loss of privilege they already experiencing.
Hello allan Ive been recently experiencing this. And am a little dumbfounded. Because i do t realize so much change has happened to me. My lifes been upsidedown. Ive actually been trying connect with you. Finally got your channel again i find a lot of simlarities in my journy to your. May i ask you to maybe contact me in fb. Gratitude..
I'm sorry you've been feeling a bit overwhelmed with change. Transition really is a gigantic change. I hope you are doing ok. Also, sorry it took me so long to respond!
If male privilege exists, so does female privilege. The very fact that female privileges are so often not discussed is one in itself. We somewhat live in a patriarchal world, but part of that is because it seems to work. Men tend to be better at handling leadership positions, as well as the downsides that come with them. Do you think there's no pressure to making decisions? Also, existing in a patriarchy is not evidence of male privilege when taking into consideration the possibility of how that can benefit women, such as only sending men and boys to war. What you called "cisgender privilege" is commonly referred to as "passing privilege". You don't stand out as a trans person, so you are said to have passing privilege. If someone was teaching my kid about radical feminism from a positive perspective, I'd fire them too. I don't take kindly to what I see as effectively hating men, especially since my child is probably going to be raised by two men (the other of whom could potentially be a trans one). As for shaving your legs, while it is more work to shave, some people will judge you as a guy for doing it. I've known of guys who tend to do it who aren't even effeminate, but they still get judged by other people. The barber situation is because it's more of a men's space, but that's also because the barber is more skilled at cutting haircuts for men. Women tend to go to spas to have their hair done (or barbers who typically cut women's hair). With guys, it's a little weird to approach women without wanting to pursue something further in a casual environment, especially with the fear of having a friend who you end up liking more than a friend. It's also more intimidating to interact with the opposite gender generally, since you never know what strangers are like. It's less this way when you're younger, but that can also be due to school being a more professional environment. It's generally less intimidating interacting with someone of the same gender.
Well, when I was a kid, other kids would call me "tomboy" as a put-down, so that made it feel like an insult to me. Also, the word seems to me to indicate that one is not a "real boy," so I don't like that. It seems to imply that you're not a proper girl nor a proper boy--I just can't get past the insulting feel I get from it.
I really enjoy and appreciate your videos, thank you. I'm about to head out on a week long camping trip (Lassen and then Crater Lake), any suggestions as to books I might enjoy? Also, are you on Instagram by chance?
Thank you! Your trip sounds great! I went to Lassen one time and enjoyed it, but I've never been to Crater Lake. Have you read Wild by Cheryl Strayed? That's one of my fav outdoorsy books. Also, The Cactus Eaters is kind of like Wild but hilarious. No, I'm not on Instagram.
That's certainly true. I haven't really experienced this so much, myself, partly since I'm just not that into swimming and never really go to pools, and partly because I have very noticeable top-surgery scars, so I don't feel totally at ease being shirtless (but when at the beach, I wear a "rash guard" swim shirt, so I do feel I pass just fine when wearing that).
Good job you have discovered that we are only equal under the law. And every other inequality that exists because of location of birth,race,gender ect...not only cannot be recified/perfected, and neither should we try. Because that "privledge" is something every American has. Also people born in these times have privledge over people born in the middle ages. The idea of privedge as you describe it cannot be fixed and trying to fix it will utterly insure that we are all suffering equally and we will all be equally poor. That is the only outcome of this fundamentally envious iddology.
I disagree. Men don't deserve to be treated with special privileges just for being men. A real meritocracy requires the elimination of privileges. Perhaps it will never fully be rectified 100% but striving for better equality under a supposed meritocracy is a good and honorable goal that we have been working on for hundreds of years and have been making improvements. It's mainly privileged people that want this progress to stop. It won't stop, and should never stop. Sorry that this doesn't align with your interests but that's just the arc of humanism through time. There's no stopping it lol. As more voices get heard, inevitably as a result of the internet, better understanding and compassion is being had. No amount of complaining by you or other men will put a stop to social progress! So enjoy what remains of your privilege while you still can! Hahaha
Yeah the differences are less obvious in wealthier more educated spaces. You didn't mention the cultural oppression from in media. You might not be subjected to hollywood as much as most but I'm from the same social class and education as you and I do hate all the shit that's produced towards keeping women subjected so I doubt you were really not bothered as a feminist when watching a Disney or an ad for instance. Unless maybe you never felt pressured by what media asked of you, having refused the gender norm at an earlier age.
Bill gates deserves to be rich because he has built a product/company that has helped millions of people. What have you built or offered that means you deserve his money. If you put out minimal effort you will get minimal results. That isn't trumps fault, it isn't the fault of some rich banner that you can't manage your money sand hold a job. Its not his fault you haven't started a sucessful business venture that benefits millions of people.if you haven't done shit you don't derseve shit
You probobly look So much better as a man if you never dated a male . where did you grow up ? What are your thoughts about procreating since you are still young .
![[Watch Party] RoV Pro League 2024 Winter | with Moowan ( Bacon Time Vs Talon )](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/CCEDhu6dPN8/mqdefault.jpg)
when i was at high school someone wrote he/she on my locker.
ugh, that's so awful. What an awful feeling that must have been. That sucks.
Hmnm it's almost like everyone's experiences are unique to their own demeanor, almost seems like we shouldn't be trying to label an entire demographic with a single stroke...
haha, yes, right on.
You seem introverted and analytical. Not nerdy.
I'd like to second every assertion you made in this video. This has certainly been my experience as well.
Thanks! I'm glad you can relate.
It's been interesting for me navigating the world as a black male now. Sure I gained privileges but also I've gained disadvantages.
I can certainly see how that would come with disadvantages, in our racist society. I'm sorry that you have to experience that. From what I've heard or seen, it sounds like being a black man could come with risk of mistreatment (or worse) from police and having other people appear to be afraid of you or suspicious of you. That's horrible. I'd be interested to hear about your experience. Do you make videos?
I'd be up to sharing by experience. I don't make videos though. I'd be open to answering some of your questions if you have anything specific or maybe writing something up. Let me know!
Attraktivness is only a small part of the reason people (most often cis-men) catcall. It is mostly to reinstate the power ratio between genders and ultimativly classes.
Excellent point!!
I think "passing privilege" is the term you're looking for here. that's more about the assumption that you're cis. cis privilege is a different thing entirely. But the whole bathroom thing is definitely a passing privilege thing. When you pass you don't have to worry about it, but when you don't it's just this whole stressful thing
For me I feel like the types of sexism I've experienced, due to being perceived as female, that have affected me the most have been all fairly subtle things. Mostly not being expected to be able to do things, not taken seriously, or ignored/not listened to. These have all given me issues that I won't be able to undo just by transitioning and passing as male. I feel like this isn't really talked about.
On the other hand I relate to some of what you say about not experiencing sexism because of looking masculine. I'm the same, I was never catcalled or anything like that. Although, there was a phase where I dressed fairly feminine, and I still didn't experience that. But I suppose even then I didn't wear makeup or dresses or anything so maybe that's why. I think there is a privilege in there somewhere, but I don't know if it's connected to masculinity, or simply just being able to ignore mainstream beauty standards to a certain degree.
Thanks for the tip - "passing privilege" makes sense. I appreciate hearing your thoughts!
Your experiences with housing were interesting to me. Here (in East-Central Europe), the housing market very disproportionately favors women, especially young women. It's mostly because they are believed to be cleanlier and tend to take care of the place better... I don't know.
It’s interesting to hear your struggle with public toilets before transitioning. I’m aware that this probably happened 10 years+ ago, but now days, as a mostly passing trans man myself, I don’t feel as much stress going to public toilets (I go to the female toilets because I just don’t have the guts to go to male toilets, also because I’m not out yet and women’s toilets just feels safer, since I literally look like a tiny kid), no one would really comment on anything, people might think it’s strange but they wouldn’t stare. Though I occasionally feel stressed going to toilets because I fear that people feel violated by my presence or felt that I’m a threat to their privacy, especially when I am in very masculine clothing such as a suit.
Nerdy & Outdoorsy? I'm not alone!
Passing privilege, that's.the phrase you were looking for LOL, I was practically yelling at my phone
hahaha, doh!
Hey there Slo,
I’m not sure if I asked you this, but how has your relationship with your father influenced you as you’ve become a man?
i had a shit relationship with my father growing up. i've recently reconciled with him.
pay attention to the context here:
fuck you. go fuck yourself. fuck you for comparing possible trauma with gender identity.
seriously - go fuck yourself. quit listening to jordan peterson.
These episodes made my blood boil SO much ! I loved how the whole cast was like « HELL NO », especially with Lisa VDP being such a strong LGBT advocate … sorority wins over misogyny on that one and it felt great
Male privilege definitely exists. It's just not what women think it is.
Thank you for sharing this…
I’m a trans man 57 and
6 months on T… I enjoy all your videos, more puzzle pieces put together for me… peace out ✌️
Hi! thanks for your comment! And congratulations on starting your transition!!!
Have you experienced mistrust yet? I find that if I"m wlkaing out fo a store to my car, and a woman is parked in the same area, walking ahead of me, I feel compelled to wait behind and let her go on her own ahead of me. Recently I was in a Trader Joe's parking lot, and saw a truck that had just parked had a headlight out. I headed over to tell her, nad she got back in her car and took off in a big hurry. I also see that people look uncomfortable if I look at their children too long. On the other hand, I've had female friends make a big fuss over a stranger;'s child, and they shared this wonderful women's moment together. Had I attempted the same thing, I think it wold have gone poorly. Perhaps the fact that I'm older and grew my hair out doesn't help (picture Dave Grohl).
One male privilege i will agree exit is testosterone. As a sports fan, I know that makes a big difference.
I am a trans woman who lives in ireland and I love all your you tub videos everything about you is lovely
I was the same way. Not dating and being introverted as well. But knowing that I felt weird alot. I was told to feel happy but wasn't happy because I was trans. I had to fake it . Wearing dresses to church and told I was a quiet girl. Looked like a girl but didn't feel like a girl. Now knowing my name is Shawn Xavier happy to be him now.
Thank you for making a video that actually helped me better understand what it is I feel privilege wise. I never really thought about it as cis gendered privilege vs queer , but that's exactly what I have been experiencing as well! I've tried to have conversations with my girlfriend explaining the privilege thing and I think this is a great way to explain it!
I really can relate a lot to your feelings and interactions pre t and currently ! I struggle with trying to understand my thoughts and feelings a lot lately especially has I am changing and the world views me differently. And yet at times I feel the same , so this video really helped me to realize how differently people are treating me because they think I am a cis -male. Also wanted to add I felt exactly the same as you about my old name and meeting people that have never seen me before ,it was always so incredibly awkward . So glad those days are over! 😊 great video!
Thanks so much! That's interesting that you can relate so much--cool. It took me quite a while to articulate all of this (not that I articulated it perfectly here)--it's complex stuff.
We all have our strengths and weaknesses.
I am very masculine, but I have aspergers (lack of intuitive social understanding).
Be social. Work with people. I'll work with systems, and you, people.
Do this for your own sake.
It happened to me as well... I was privileged, i was always feminin and felt accepted muchvmore in comparison to other trans people... To the point i even forgot i was trans... Until now... You do look nice...
Every time I get a hair cut, the barber asks if I’m gay (because I requested to cut my long hair short, or request for shorter and shorter hair styles), in the most recent experience, my barber asked “are you a boy or girl?”, then insists on charging me 10 more dollars because she had deciphered from my voice that I’m AFAB, hence charging the “ladies” price on me, despite having similar hair lengths to boys.
wtf?! that's horrible!! so rude and also discriminatory! I'm so sorry you've experienced that.
I wonder how this will influence your career in the future .In any case it seems you made the right choice for you under the given circumstances .
What do you teach ?
I wonder if you could go beyond your personal experience and speak about transgenders in society. I feel you make the point 5 to 10 minutes into the video and so I wish you would add a bit more content about other people whether academic or otherwise .
funny how all the males in the comments want to deny that male privilege is a thing soo bad. boy just accept it. you are privileged. congratulations
yes! exactly! :)
Crystinia El Arguioui it's awful though. That shouldnt be
Jerry dee well said sir
Crystinia El Arguioui I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't call me a male or a boy... I'd prefer to be described as a giant whacky wailing inflatable arm flailing tube being
You wonder why so many people hate you. Maybe because you're arrogant and unable to see the life of a cis white man from any perspective other than your own. They have a nice car and house, it's because they worked and earned it and the color of their skin and gender did not make it easier for them.
I always appreciate your observations as I can relate to a lot of it.
Not shaving legs is the only privilege you listed. Even then women ridicule other women with hairy legs.
The majority of things you listed were either 'cis' privilege or just a confidence issue.
And I wouldn't call conversations a privilege.
Just an observation.
This is a really poor understanding of privilege and sexism
So all in all there isn't some secrete door of privelage in becoming a man. Trans people have some very interesting viewpoints from their unique perspective. I hope you will continue in your good work at dispelling this myth of the oppressive male patriarchy. To be honest I feel like MSM has posted with a broad brush a general perception of at least very strong dislike of all things white straight male.
Great video Slofox, thank you as always. If there's any male privilege I gained, I'm on the same boat as you; no fear about leaving my legs unshaved, easy access to bathrooms, feeling comfortable in men's sections, like for clothing shops. It's the privilege of not having to explain "I know I'm a woman, but I want a men's ____ " every time, it was just so awkward. So I know what you mean about cis privilege. It's sad because I feel like it's a very similar state as being in the closet as a gay or lesbian person, but in a twisted way because your identity is actually validated while your trans status is closeted (or is it?). It's no wonder people are obsessed with passing. I'm always obsessively thinking about how much of my dysphoria is resulting from society (my environment) rather than just the condition of being trans in itself. I know it's impossible to really tell (since I only know of my existence in this current society), but nonetheless. I'm also pretty lucky and have been accepted generally everywhere for being trans, and I am also working at a white-collar job and am half white, half Japanese. Only place I'm getting "what the hell" reactions and sometimes snide remarks are from doctors, so that's been my biggest stress. Saddening because it's such clear evidence that doctors, who should be the least judgmental of all people, are indeed judging. I haven't changed my name to a male name yet, so I also fear getting the "you're not what I expected!" surprised reaction. But I don't get it too much. I'm sort of thinking about keeping my female name but honestly I wish I can find a multi cultural name that is unisex. It's been challenging finding something I like. Anyway, it's always a pleasure watching your videos, looking forward to your future ones.
Shopping for clothes is another great example of privilege or things just being easier. That's awful that some doctors have been rude to you--so horrible. Some doctors are just not nice--it's not what you'd expect. I hope you find a good name for yourself! :)
good thing you can adopt.
Don't get me wrong here, but no one goes through life without some kind of stigma hold against you - cis m/k, queer ect.
Is it really a privilege not to have to shave your legs? Sounds awful little to care about.
Standing up to take a piss would be a privilege too then?
I think it is a privilege to have a life without being bullied, being seriously crippled, living in a western society.
To make everything about privileges, will dilute every privileges.
Differences is ok. I can't have babies, and that is ok.
Is it a privilege to have the possibility to be pregnant?
We are just different, everyone is.
You just moved closer to how you wanted to be objectified as a person.
+Mira - Good catch! Yes, I have noticed as everyone ages, they become more and more insignificant in society. And, that is added to whatever loss of privilege they already experiencing.
This is a bit to simplistic. People become insignificant past a certain age.And children are certainly treated s fairly insignificant.
Funny you mention male privilege, I just recently wrote an article about i, which included interviews with a few transmen of different backgrounds.
Interesting! Where can I find the article?
Hello allan
Ive been recently experiencing this. And am a little dumbfounded. Because i do t realize so much change has happened to me. My lifes been upsidedown. Ive actually been trying connect with you. Finally got your channel again i find a lot of simlarities in my journy to your. May i ask you to maybe contact me in fb. Gratitude..
I'm sorry you've been feeling a bit overwhelmed with change. Transition really is a gigantic change. I hope you are doing ok. Also, sorry it took me so long to respond!
If male privilege exists, so does female privilege. The very fact that female privileges are so often not discussed is one in itself.
We somewhat live in a patriarchal world, but part of that is because it seems to work. Men tend to be better at handling leadership positions, as well as the downsides that come with them. Do you think there's no pressure to making decisions? Also, existing in a patriarchy is not evidence of male privilege when taking into consideration the possibility of how that can benefit women, such as only sending men and boys to war.
What you called "cisgender privilege" is commonly referred to as "passing privilege". You don't stand out as a trans person, so you are said to have passing privilege.
If someone was teaching my kid about radical feminism from a positive perspective, I'd fire them too. I don't take kindly to what I see as effectively hating men, especially since my child is probably going to be raised by two men (the other of whom could potentially be a trans one).
As for shaving your legs, while it is more work to shave, some people will judge you as a guy for doing it. I've known of guys who tend to do it who aren't even effeminate, but they still get judged by other people.
The barber situation is because it's more of a men's space, but that's also because the barber is more skilled at cutting haircuts for men. Women tend to go to spas to have their hair done (or barbers who typically cut women's hair). With guys, it's a little weird to approach women without wanting to pursue something further in a casual environment, especially with the fear of having a friend who you end up liking more than a friend. It's also more intimidating to interact with the opposite gender generally, since you never know what strangers are like. It's less this way when you're younger, but that can also be due to school being a more professional environment. It's generally less intimidating interacting with someone of the same gender.
you seem insecure
Can I ask why you hate the word tomboy?
Well, when I was a kid, other kids would call me "tomboy" as a put-down, so that made it feel like an insult to me. Also, the word seems to me to indicate that one is not a "real boy," so I don't like that. It seems to imply that you're not a proper girl nor a proper boy--I just can't get past the insulting feel I get from it.
I really enjoy and appreciate your videos, thank you. I'm about to head out on a week long camping trip (Lassen and then Crater Lake), any suggestions as to books I might enjoy? Also, are you on Instagram by chance?
Thank you! Your trip sounds great! I went to Lassen one time and enjoyed it, but I've never been to Crater Lake. Have you read Wild by Cheryl Strayed? That's one of my fav outdoorsy books. Also, The Cactus Eaters is kind of like Wild but hilarious. No, I'm not on Instagram.
Hey now👋 I just love what you video. i really do. You can see mine arent as exciting as yours
Another thing that should count as a cis (and definitely a cis passing) privilege is the possibility to go swimming publicly without being questioned.
That's certainly true. I haven't really experienced this so much, myself, partly since I'm just not that into swimming and never really go to pools, and partly because I have very noticeable top-surgery scars, so I don't feel totally at ease being shirtless (but when at the beach, I wear a "rash guard" swim shirt, so I do feel I pass just fine when wearing that).
Good job you have discovered that we are only equal under the law. And every other inequality that exists because of location of birth,race,gender ect...not only cannot be recified/perfected, and neither should we try. Because that "privledge" is something every American has. Also people born in these times have privledge over people born in the middle ages. The idea of privedge as you describe it cannot be fixed and trying to fix it will utterly insure that we are all suffering equally and we will all be equally poor. That is the only outcome of this fundamentally envious iddology.
I disagree. Men don't deserve to be treated with special privileges just for being men. A real meritocracy requires the elimination of privileges. Perhaps it will never fully be rectified 100% but striving for better equality under a supposed meritocracy is a good and honorable goal that we have been working on for hundreds of years and have been making improvements. It's mainly privileged people that want this progress to stop. It won't stop, and should never stop. Sorry that this doesn't align with your interests but that's just the arc of humanism through time. There's no stopping it lol. As more voices get heard, inevitably as a result of the internet, better understanding and compassion is being had. No amount of complaining by you or other men will put a stop to social progress! So enjoy what remains of your privilege while you still can! Hahaha
Yeah the differences are less obvious in wealthier more educated spaces.
You didn't mention the cultural oppression from in media. You might not be subjected to hollywood as much as most but I'm from the same social class and education as you and I do hate all the shit that's produced towards keeping women subjected so I doubt you were really not bothered as a feminist when watching a Disney or an ad for instance. Unless maybe you never felt pressured by what media asked of you, having refused the gender norm at an earlier age.
Bill gates deserves to be rich because he has built a product/company that has helped millions of people. What have you built or offered that means you deserve his money. If you put out minimal effort you will get minimal results. That isn't trumps fault, it isn't the fault of some rich banner that you can't manage your money sand hold a job. Its not his fault you haven't started a sucessful business venture that benefits millions of people.if you haven't done shit you don't derseve shit
You probobly look So much better as a man if you never dated a male .
where did you grow up ?
What are your thoughts about procreating since you are still young .