Get the Most Out of Therapy! | Kati Morton
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 9 ก.ย. 2024
- I'm Kati Morton, a licensed therapist making Mental Health videos!
#katimorton #therapist #therapy
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Yes yes yes!!! I loved this. Not all therapist are created equal. The gems are out there
Agreed!!! It's worth waiting until you find the right fit :) xoxo
Kati Morton How long does one have to wait?? And how to recognize if it is the right fit?
Kati Morton o
@@theflittingbutterfly 4 session at max. For me.
Thank you for this video and all the advice talked about in the video I haven't been with this channel very long but really been looking for a good therapy video I been watching a few video s already of what relates to me I get comfort from these videos thank you
My last therapist just chatted and there was zero treatment plans, she never wrote anything down, didn’t give me work to do, and would usually just talk about herself as well.
She was a very nice person and I liked her, but I got nothing out of sessions. :(
I got discouraged for a while and stopped going, but I finally found a Dr that knows her stuff! She helps so much!
yes this is a typical story, i hear it all the time.
my first (and current) therapist is like this as well.
Me too😕My first/second and current therapist is like this. I’m currently doing a free program though; I wonder if I should continue.
I read this as “How to Get Out of Therapy” lol
Jay Robert sorta seems like what the vid is lmaoo
I meaaaan, that can be the ultimate goal of going to therapy! To get out of therapy!
Hi Katie, I finally told my therapist after 4 years about a past trauma and I was surprised of how liberating it was. Of course it was hard but she really helped and understood me, I wish I could have told her earlier but I just couldn’t. Anyway thank you for your video!
I am SO PROUD OF YOU!!! Yay!! I know it can be so hard, but it's so worth it :) xoxo
greta I am waiting for my appt. with my therapist and I think I’m going to tell her about my own trauma even though my insides are screaming not to... Glad it helped you! :)
Greta what happened eith you?
just in time for therapy tomorrow! thank you :)
Yay! xoxo
Same here for my session Wednesday!
Y'all can I just say that her voice is so relaxing like all the time. Hearing her voice everyday makes me smile.
"You might feel like you're back at square one but trust me, you're not"
That teared me up the moment I heard she says it....
I can't find any more words to say you're absolutely incredible and another amazing video! Thank you!
Awe you're so welcome!! Glad you found it helpful :) xoxo
"Are you new to my channel?
Welcome"
I love how you always say that. 😊
I always felt bad about always talking about myself in therapy, but now what you said makes me feel better.
Being honest is hard sometimes but its sooo fkn important in therapy.
Love the way you say 'Welcome', it's so sweet!
Ive been going therapy recently and its what i needed in my life. From being depressed and lonely, and noone caring, i feel happy and focusing on my future
My therapist is trying to set goals but I'm just messed up and not sure what I'm supposed to be like. I wish she would just tell me how to act and feel because I have no point of reference.
I was there too.I wanted my therapist to tell me what to do. I didn't want anything. I would sabotage the suggestions he gave me. What worked was to try behaviours and thoughts and see if the outcome was good or not good. I believe that only I can decide what I want.
Well it all depends on the person you see, so you two get along or not? What they say is not completely law though skilled,You kind of have to be your own reference
Love you Kati! I so needed this right now. I’ve been really struggling with what I’m getting out of therapy lately and this is so helpful. Thank you so much! ❤️
Awe yay! I am so glad it was helpful :) xxoox
I love that you do the descriptions I know they probably take a long time but I have no energy and concentration to absorb all this but to be able to click on videos and read the desc quickly and just watch the bits that I feel I don’t understand :”) is lovely
Awesome video, Kati! (As per usual!) I think therapy homework is so critical. Even when my therapist doesn’t assign homework, I have found that journaling between sessions helps me guide my therapy and gain personal insight. I would add a cautionary note that my abusive husband “sent me” (the therapist’s words) to a therapist who happened to specialize in child psychology. This combination was a horrible one. The therapist had as my therapy goal to make me a more obedient housewife. I saw this therapist for many years, and he enabled the emotional abuse that was going on at home. He was a very respected therapist who used to head the adolescent unit at Menninger. Not an easy situation from which to escape. It was really only the intervention of a friend coupled with the national domestic abuse hotline that allowed me to finally see the situation for what it was. So I think I would add that as well: let people in your life know roughly what is going on. You don’t need to give all the details. But it’s good to have an objective opinion. If you’re not allowed to have friends because of the abuse at home, try to join an online support group. That’s what I did, and it saved my life.
Jori Church wow 😯. That’s really scary. I’m glad you were able to see the situation for what it was.
Samantha Khan I was not initially able to. It took my friend a while to help me understand that all that behavior wasn’t normal.
Thank goodness for that friend of yours I’m so happy you got out of that abusive situation
As a therapist, I fully agree with you about therapy goals and a treatment plan is so important.
I wish you were my therapist ...You seem so down to earth and straight forward!
My therapy is going to start next month!!! Already was diagnosed with 3 personality disorders (biggest one BPD), and was supposed to start years ago, unfortunately was in another country with the hubby when I got previous invitations, but now it's finally going to happen and I've never been more ready! Made a lot of progress on my own (hoarder house cleanup, binge watching lovely Kati, journaling), but the big work is coming. Finally. Good luck to everyone going through the same!
I just worked up the courage to source and contact a therapist suitable for me, I’m so glad I watched this before! I can’t afford to waste time or money, so thank you very much 💕
I’ve got the best therapist! The connection was instantly there. I had to be able to trust her. She really truly cares about people. I’m seeing her twice a week and she offers so much support.
How can I get over losing a therapist who I was very attached to? She meant the world to me and was the single most important person in my life
You know one thing I wished more people talked about? “You wanna get the most out of therapy? Stop lying to and/or trying to manipulate your therapist. Don’t minimize your behavior. Don’t try to justify any of it. Be raw and REAL. Stop blaming everyone else for everything going wrong in your life, too.”
I CANT WAIT FOR YOU TO BLOW UP WHEN YOU GET FEATURED IN SHANES VIDE AHHHH IM SO HAPPY YOU DESERVE IT
Aaaaand she blew it.
Shiznit 91 how?
“I can’t wait for you to blow up“ sounded like a terrorism threat for a moment there
Another awesome video kati thank you❤️
Hi Charles
Is it okay to have sex with your therapist?
Great video!! Could you do a video on recovering from childhood molest? Thank u so much for the videos!
Yes, please, PLEASE Katie
Please!!!
Is it weird for your psychologist not to give you any homework to do inbetween sessions? Thank you for this Kati!
Not all of them do.. but you can definitely tell them you would like some :) xoxo
Kati Morton - Thank you Kati! I just preordered your book on Amazon UK! I cannot wait!
Hi Honor, to build off of Kati’s reply, it depends a lot on the model they’re using. CBT and DBT are notoriously big for homework, but frameworks like Psychodynamic therapy tend to have a large focus on what happens in the session as opposed to outside it.
Of course, if you want homework, feel free to ask!
Ty Catts Thank you so much!
Mine does and I never do it.
Thank you so much for bearing the emotional slings and arrows that come along with putting your advice out there in the digital world, your guidance is truely a priceless additional tool for those seeking progress xo
I don’t know if I want to go to therapy because at the moment I don’t want to get better. Or I’m scared to get better
You are a wonderful human!
I've only seen two therapists in my life, but immediately I knew the second one was right for me. I clicked with her, we had a natural syngery - not just in the way she worked, etc, but we had chemistry. It's very important you have chemistry with your therapist, otherwise it just won't work.
I just revealed to my group that I had a hard time reading the materials. I am so happy that you will have an audio that will help me a lot. Kati I think a lot of us have trouble with our reading. And remembering what we read. So that makes this process challenging. I bought a book. And then I purchased an e version on my Kendal. This help because I can choose to pay for the Audio or let Alexa read it to me. Well anyway thanks for another great video.
how do i explain myself properly when i have trouble knowing how i feel?
try to start tracking what goes on each day (just major points) and print out a "feelings chart" you can search for them online and print them out from there. When you write down the major points in your day, see if any feelings words jump out at you and help you better describe how that situation made you feel. I may be hard at first but just have your goal be coming up with one every other day and build from there :) I hope that helps give you the words to describe how you feel!! xoxo
thank you that might be very helpful
your nearly right
i think it's because of the amount of anxiety of not wanting to disappoint people in my life.
i think i'm putting too much pressure on myself really
Unfortunately, I had many psychologists and none of them were helpful. KATI, YOU ARE SUCH A RARE PERSON. I wish there were more therapists like you 💫
I'm having hard time to talk honestly. It's very hard. I understand that nobody can help people who are not ready to change, but I want to know how I can get ready to change myself. It needs a big courage. For example, I'm struggling with my eating disorder for four years. I know that I'm not really thinking like I want to recover. But, I strongly hope I can recover from this unhealthy thoughts. Thank you for your great video.
Sometimes i practice honesty with myself. I'll write in a journal as i feel things and share it with my therapist or I'll practice saying things out loud in the mirror. But you are right, it's super hard and does take a lot of courage because being honest is being vulnerable. But it's also the best way to be authentic (apropos, yesterday i just had a very very honest conversation with my best friend about something very painful and oh boy did i cry and i was scared, but i know that if i hadn't been able to be honest with him, it would ha eaten away at and destroyed our relationship--i journaled my thoughts first to help).
This is so helpful! I just started therapy and I feel like I am having frustrating "why am I not better" thoughts. And I know I need to be patient, and continue to do my home work... but I am so quick to compare my situation to the rest of my family and question if it's not working while at the same time praising therapy.
I like my therapist so much! She is such a sweet nice woman. I have been seeing her for nearly 4 years now. But still I can‘t really believe she likes me(that’s a believe of mine, that I am not likeable ). Hope I can change this.
Thank you. Your last point helps a lot.
I really wish I could benefit from therapy. I go to Kaiser for Therapy and have worked with two therapists. The first one kept telling me to distract myself instead of helping me cope. The second Therapist just told me to "let it go" and "move on". I've quit therapy because this advice is not worth the time or money.
It can take seeing a few therapists before you find one that works for you :) So don't give up! Also, you may want to see someone outside of Kaiser.. and see if they will work with you on cost, so you can still afford it :) xoxo
Therapists at Kaiser are awful tbh try and go to someone outside of them even though it can be expensive
Joseph, I don't know where you live, but here in Tacoma, WA there are several low-income/sliding scale mental health centers. My new therapist worked at one of them and now he is letting me pay a discounted fee for therapy. If you have a United Way where you live (only in the States), you can call them and they can give you a list of resources so you can get the help you want and need. I hope this helps.
@@DrummerGrrrl Thank you!
@@lindseyrob4001 You're right. I will be looking elsewhere for treatment.
Hey kati. Recently ive been diagnosed with borderline Personality Disorder and i hate it. Before my diagnoses was depression and i was okay with that. I feel ashamed i got labeled BPD because i feel like bpd means youre just really needy for attention. Rationally i know this is not true but i can't shake the feeling. I love your videos keep up the great work xx #katiFAQ
Thank you for making this video! I feel like my therapist and myself have gotten a bit complacent in just talking about things as they come and more so focused on check ins regarding my overall mood. It's important to reconnect to my goals. 😊
I just started therapy again, I was with the same therapist for 7 years because I was young and didn’t understand what to gain from those appointments. There was no homework or real gain from the conversation most of it was me venting because I was so young I really didn’t know how therapy was supposed to work. Eventually I vetted countless therapists until I found someone that genuinely cares and gives me “homework” during each visit. It’s been more constructive than any session I’ve had & this video just confirms for me that I’m on the right path. Thank you so much.
Kati, thank you so much for demystifying therapy to people that are still a bit anxious about seeking out for mental health specialist.
Number 3. Yep just what I needed to hear. Think I trust her enough to try and be honest about things that I have never shared with anyone. A video I needed this week.
As a therapist and someone who worked damn hard for a year in my own personal therapy, I 100% agree with everything you've said here Kati.
I've been in therapy for many years, and I love my therapist. She listens and is caring. She's great but since I've been in therapy for as long as I've been in it I've come to realize what are some things that would be good to look for in a therapist. Anyway, when my sister got married to a guy that was studying to become a therapist I could tell right away that he's going to be a bad therapist. Lol I lucked out finding my therapist when I did.
Thank you for this video! I am going in to my very first therapy session later this week, after years and years of struggling with my mental health. I am nervous and anxious about it, but I'm intent on getting the most out of my sessions as I can. I'm tired of not working to better myself! And your videos have relieved some of my anxiety, and made me even more sure of my decision to get help. Thanks Kati!
I have therapy this week and I’ve seen a lot of therapists and turned down a lot. I literally feel like she’s a friend and we get passionate about things and she critiques me, and tells me like it is and what I have to do or not do(useful advice)- something a friend couldn’t give me. She pushes me and has helped me through a lot of crisis.
That moment when you want to stop the video all the time, but in the end give it a thumbs up, because you realize you've been wanting to close it because it's so true
Eyebrows on point thouu
Awe thanks!! xoxo
Well, that's good! Eyebrows ARE the most important thing with a TH-cam personality! LOL.
It has taken me a while, but I think I found the source I need... a psychologist group focused on my needs (diagnosis & type of therapy needed). I contacted them via their form email on their website. Still waiting to hear back. Will call next week if I don't hear something today. This is going to be a slog, but I can't put it off any longer and I've found what I think is a good fit.
I'm so glad to see your video. I "suffer" from Bipolar and PTSD. I used to go to therapy but I guess I've had many excuses of life and family, ever since I left the military. Listening to this makes me want to try again. Thanks for you refocusing my energy in the right direction. I hope this gets my "up" days more visible than my "down" days.
Its though watching your videos that I have mustered up the courage to reach out and seek therapy for the betterment of myself. Thanks for all the kind encouragement and great content! 👍
I’m starting dbt classes today so it’s pretty cool you put this video out.
After 8 years of a bad therapist who mainly talked about himself, I was FINALLY given someone who helps TREMENDOUSLY! Just don't waste your time like I did just so you don't hurt someone's feelings!
1. Be picky and don’t be afraid to try several therapists out before you decide whom to work with (can refer to Kati’s videos about characteristics of good/ bad therapists)
They should challenge you, remember your goals and click with you. The therapeutic relationship is key to make the most of it.
2. Have an idea of what you want to talk about/ change in therapy. You don’t have to know how to fix it though.
3. Be honest and open. You can share through different medias like art as music if speaking out loud may seem a little uncomfortable at times.
4. Set goals (long term/ short term) treatment plans are important, even if it’s a lose guide.
5. Set boundaries and uphold them.
6. Do your therapy homework. It could be reading a book or making use of a workbook. Do the work between your sessions.
7. Take responsibility for yourself and your actions. (Doing your homework, being honest, attend the sessions) you have to make the change in your life
8. Be patient and kind with yourself. The therapeutic process is hard and sometimes you’ll have slip ups but it’ll get better.
I have seen therapists in the past, but the one I have now really focuses on a treatment plan and goals. She is wonderful and amazing and I have made tremendous progress for trauma and binge eating disorder. The two I had in the past were also good, but this one rocks. If you don't know if you are on a treatment plan, ASK ABOUT IT. KATIE ROCKS!!!
Hey kati ,
You should do one on trauma release exercises. Or reasons why our body shakes during therapy.
I was just thinking about this Katie.. I said to myself that enough is enough. I will start being more open to my therapist because I’m really not making any progress...
I also feel that to get the most out of therapy is to also allow (if needed) for your therapist to be a patient advocate for you when you have social anxiety and can't speak up. I know personally for me having my therapist be an advocate for me when I can't be has been a huge life saver. I don't always know how to speak up for myself, I have really bad social anxiety, so during those times I need someone to guide me or to stand up for me. Having that has changed everything. My old therapist wasn't great at all, so when I started seeing my now therapist I was a little nervous, still am, but I am slowly realizing how different they are. It's night and day.
Before anyone wants to say something, I am working on my social anxiety, I do know how to be my own advocate, but there are many times where my brain decides that advocating for myself is like facing a firing squad. It's during those times, having someone else that can advocate for me has helped. I am GREAT at advocating for others though, before my mom died I advocated for her 100% without fear. Mental health is really weird sometimes.
Little harder to be picky in rural areas, struggling pretty bad to find the right fit. Totally preordered your book though :)
You can do therapy online
I love it when you say "WELCOME". ❤
Congrats on the book. That's awesome👏🏾
You are brillant Thank you for your skill
Omg omg omg KATI I JUST SAW YOU IN THE NEW SHANE SERIES IM SO EXCITEEED!!!!
could not have stumbled across this at a more perfect time!! literally watching this with another window open looking for therapists!
Thanks for the tips!
Your pretty good. My therapist is much like you. It took my several attempts to find a good one. Now that I have, I'm not looking for another. Ever!
The treatment plan thing was interesting to me. I've never had a treatment plan with my therapist, but we work really well together. I've had her for two or three years and I see her once a week, occasionally texting her if I'm feeling really low or to update her on something (ie: i asked if i could tell her when/if i came out to my parents). We know that we're working on my anxiety, obsessive tendencies, etc, but there isn't really an A-Z plan. It works for us, though.
Thanks for this.
4:40 right there , right there. HOW WILL I KNOW THAT I'M MAKING PROGRESS???
I'm currently shopping for a quality therapist in my area and being picky. I had a great one up in Portland that I saw during marriage counseling and subsequent individual counseling, and that ended when the therapist left for a 1yr mission trip (talk about having abandonment issues reignited!). The biggest hurdle has been making the call... I tried contacted one therapist through their websites "contact me" message center and received no response- sucky! Fingers crossed the next one I choose chooses me, too.
Thank you for listing everything out in the description 🙏
Your book comes out 2 days before my birthday!
Yay!! Woot woot!! xoxo
That's the first thing my therapist asked me our first meeting, "what do I want to get out of my treatment." And then she would always follow up on the next meeting.
You are super amazing!!!
I’ve been through several therapists.
My memory is the result of an injury that caused me to even start therapy.
I don’t know how to be a patient.
I’m definitely going to have to reestablish my reason for therapy.
Thank you!
I've been struggling with derealization and it was so bad that I honestly thought my last option was suicide. Luckily I have a partner who pushed me to see a doctor and find a therapist. My second session is coming up soon and there is so much that I've been holding onto. My only problem is I have no clue what happened to me when I was younger. There is a chunk of my childhood that seems so dreamlike and I have vivid dreams already so it's difficult to discern what really happened. I don't want to feel like this but, I feel lost when it comes to what to talk about.
I’d really like to hear a version of this video for people who are going to therapy through a healthcare plan. There are a lot of things you talked about that are sooooooo different for me. For example, I am not spending money, it’s covered by insurance. But I don’t get to choose the frequency of visits - i get in when there’s an opening which is every 2-6 weeks. I do have a hard time going between sessions, but I don’t have a way to increase the sessions. This is just one example!
ive known my therapist for more than 2 years, she was referred to me through my high school and now that i’ve started college the time has come for us to terminate our sessions. And when you mentioned the part about being attached to your therapist it really struck a chord within me. She’s helped me through some of the most difficult situations i’ve ever had in my life and i’m genuinely sad because i won’t have her anymore to be able to talk to. My college offers counseling with therapists but i just don’t want to let go of my therapist because she’s absolutely amazing and has been such a big help. I guess im afraid of starting over with a new therapist because im still clinging to the relationship and bond that i have with my old one. I don’t know how to come to terms with the fact that i won’t be seeing her anymore because i believe that i still need to have sessions with her even though she thinks that i don’t need her counseling anymore
anell peña that really sucks that you have to move on. What might help is seeing if your therapist can reach out to a counselor at your university and brief them on the work you’ve done so you won’t be starting over. You can also ask if you can do phone sessions and then tapper off so it’s not so sudden. Kati also has some great videos on this! Hope this helps! th-cam.com/video/4NxMtG4Jp98/w-d-xo.html
th-cam.com/video/R-_dFO432vg/w-d-xo.html
TK thanks so much! i’ll look into those videos
Thank you so much for this. I just moved to the south beach area & I've been feeling burnt out trying to get back into the swing of therapy. This video helped me settle some of my nerves about seeing new people (while providing me a solid structure!) Thank you so, so much Kati. I'm excited to get into session.
Just saw a small clip of you in Part 1 of Shane's new series. I AM SO EXCITED to hear your thoughts and to finally see you and Shane meet in this series!!
Yesss gurl i just discovered her from the series she s great
@@guitarbitch8414 I've been on the "Kati train" for the last couple of years or so. I've been a fan of Shane since 2009-ish. "Name a better duo; I'll wait." Haha.
I've started going to therapy recently (in part due to your videos-- thanks Kati!) so this is a very timely topic for me. This kind of stuff is really helpful!
Excellent video Kati. As a therapist in training. I am so looking forward to reading your book too. Keep up the good work.
I think the most important things you said were when you said that you have to do the work and have a treatment plan. I had a great relationship with my therapist and we would talk a lot about my current plans, but until we had worksheets and a program to deal with my negative thoughts I didn't feel like we were making all the progress we could.
These past couple of weeks have been really hard for me but I can’t afford a therapist. I tried getting a job but nothing so far and when I did work I would constantly have to run to the bathroom to cry. I really want to be helped but everything is just making it seem impossible so I’m trying to help myself and there’s been so many times that I want to give up and give in to it. But my sisters and boyfriend are rooting for me and I don’t want to let them down and I want to get better for them but man I’m just tired. 15 years of pain is just to long for me to deal with especially when there’s more shit adding to it.
Goals are necessary! Clients will chase rabbits if we don’t ask. I tell them that my job is to work myself out of a job!
Blessed to have heard this!!!
You're wonderful. I'm really grateful for your TH-cam videos
thank you so much for this video! I have my first therapy appointment ever in early October and this helped a lot!
What I've experienced is that sessions are episodic, and left to go with the flow. I have touched base to therapy a few times in the last years for really specific topics. I explained what I wanted to work on and my goal with the therapy in question. A couple of sessions later therapist default to "tell me what you feel" and passively sitting down. I realized that it is better for me to solve my issues by my own and do a thorough research on my end (meta analysis included). With that, I'm not suggesting anyone to avoid a therapist. That's not the case as I've always recommend people to go see one. I'm just stating that to me, therapy hasn't been helpful given the passive, lack of focused and poor follow up nature of my interactions. Just in case, I don't reach any therapist out of the scheduled session.
Hi Katie! I was wondering if you could make a video on how to cope with getting a new therapist. Thx
The treatment plan is so true though! I once saw someone who literally told me that I just come in and talk about whatever was on my mind. It didn't go anywhere and I made no progress at all!
Kati... I have been with you for a while now and you have helped me a lot amd have taught me a lot. With Jacksepticeye and now Shane may I just say... I AM SOOO PROUD. It is amazing that a youtuber with your type of content is getting the attention that is sooo important to get... You are a youtuber who everyone can benefit from watching. Keep it up, I am so proud. Love youu!!💕
Thanks for making these videos!
Thank you Ms. K.
Thank you so much for this video. I just started with a new therapist last week. I am in a whole new cycle in my life I have become disabled and want to learn how to deal with it and identify who I am now. Thank you so much for the tips they're all very important and they've helped me make it clear on what I need to do to proceed to get the most out of my new therapy. Do you know in over many many years not one therapist has had a treatment plan except the one I'm seeing now. It was always just coming on in and talking about whatever. Have a great day or evening.
It can and will get better
This whole video is helpful So thorough and like a good song you know the repetition of your closing remarks helps ground the new learning and feels familiar/nurturing
Thank you again 🙏
This video was really helpful to see that it was the right decision to stop my therapy I went to for over half a year. I sat in there and had the feeling a was just talking to a friend. Even though I went in there and set goals (big and small ones) at my first session and gave my best at home where I really tried to work on myself with tricks I knew or googled because from her I got no tipps and tricks. I tried to ask her questions to stimulate a dialogue, but mostly I just talked. And after over half a year there was no progress at all, I even felt worse. When I said I wanted to stop the therapy she said in the last session that she wouldn't think that I would ever finish my Masters degree, even though I told her in former sessions that nobody in my life ever believed in me. Those words kind of hurt me. I think it was the right decision and I'm not sure if I want to start a therapy again after this experience.
I just booked a couple appointments with a new therapist today so this is perfect! It's been years and I think the videos u and Jack/Sean did really helped motivate me ☺