@@dispertamenina STAY STRONG, STAY CALM AND WITH CONFIDENCE. HAVE GOOD BOUNDARIES! TREAT THEM FAIRLY REGARDLESS OF HOW THEY ACT. YOUR KIDS ARE WATCHING 💖💖💖🙏🙏🙏
I’m going through this right now. 100% spot on. Mother constantly accuses me of disgusting things. It’s so sad that good dads (or moms) have to go through stuff like this.
Then recommend a change in custody, problem solved. But you don’t as it’s “traumatic” for the child. It is only traumatic if the decision would be in favour of the child father relationship. Who snatched away the child first and makes accusations and establishes a new status quo “wins”. You (custody evaluators) could change it but you don’t.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. My son is going through the same issues. My son doesn’t even have his name on the back and the woman is stating my son is abusive with no merit.
I’m am a father with residential custody. I went to pick up my kids for my parenting time and their mother had moved out of state, 1,250 miles away from me. So, it can be done guys. Document everything and follow the court order to a T. I even went as far as completely quitting drinking. Also, hire an attorney! Focus on your kids. They’re only kids for a short time. Good luck guys!
Alex your so right in my case the other parent lying manipulation just to win I have been honest from the beginning and will fight for the best interests of our kids Emotionally abuse is not whats best by any child their not a trophy to win our actions effect our children. Your so correct I'm sticking with facts honesty and truth and facts and our kids are all that matters in all this
We give God all the glory. I have gone to court on two other different cases without a lawyer and won. There are times when a lawyer is needed, so let the Holy Spirit lead you. Prayer and fasting always work for directions. You never, never assume anything. Always seek the Lord's face before you do anything legally. Chaplain Hope
I have a friend and her ex-husband who honestly handled custody of their daughter better than anyone! These two despised each other, their divorce was a nightmare. Then came custody, they turned into very different people. Dad stayed in the home, Mom moved two blocks away. Their daughter was 14 at the time of the divorce, at the time it was safe for the child to walk between the two homes. Basically the child lived with Mom, but could go to Dad's anytime and often stayed overnight at Dad's during the week or weekends. Both parents were able to constructively talk to each other when it came to their daughter. When it came to money again no issues, Dad offered to pay support but Mom was able to take care of her own bills. In the end both patents just equally bought things as needed, paid fees or whatever again somehow both parents were able to communicate. I believe they both understood they were equally responsible for paying their daughter's bills. If my friend had unexpected bills, her ex had no problem paying for things that my friend usually paid. Weirdest thing that they could make parenting work but not their relationship.
Melissa Now, this is a rare story in the world of divorce and parenting. It is wonderful to know the adults are acting mature and working together. Think of the lesson their child learned.
unfortunately the state is incentivized financially to put one of the parents on child support regardless of what the parents agree on. also in many states, the judges are also financially incentivized to do this. CSEAs have been turned into money farms for the state... policy has supplanted morality
There are parents who are highly manipulative; I'm dealing with one. All custody evaluators and GAL's should have extensive trauma and psychological abuse training.
I know how you feel. My ex is narcissistic and lies so much to make everyone else to be the cause of all problems. Never received my day infront of the judge and now I've given up all rights to them to rid myself and my future of the ex and her destructive nature.
I think using custody to enforce court orders when it is detrimental to the child is wrong. I think the proper way to deal with disobedience of court orders is with a contempt petition. In my case, from day one my daughter's dad lied and also asked for court orders just so he could claim I was violating them. He actually filed a petition for contempt which was totally bogus, but within a few months I was violating orders. So he supplemented the contempt petition. I got some gag orders overturned on appeal, but you are supposed to follow them until they are overturned. I cannot follow a court order if it is going to hurt my daughter mire in the long run. Sometimes having custody is not the most important thing, protecting the child from additional trauma is. The courts really failed us, but I trusted the system at first and was compliant and cooperative. When I figured out what was going on, I had to push back. In my case, we had never been married. We worked from an agreed order until our daughter was old enough to go to school and then he decided to cut me out of her life. I could not afford a lawyer and he had one that lied with impunity. I always supported my daughter's relationship with her dad. He completely erased me. I am appealing the latest custody modification order. I can see very easily why some parents walk away. I have known many parents whose children were torn apart like a piece of meat two dogs were fighting over. Some kids committed suicide or ended up in mental hospitals. It is so sick.
Lydia Hubbell, I hope you are able to prevail, I know this is a tough time for you and I sympathize with your plight. You are right that our children need to know that we love them no matter what.
Im so sorry this happened to you. I appreciate your recognition of “what is best for the child”. It’s like the old bi me tale of the women who said “cut the child in half” . The king knew immediately she was not the mother. A mother will walk away before inflicting more pain
My in-laws are acting so much like that mother, who is completely obsessed with what I do. My inlaws reach out to family members of mine that don't like me, and they have made 10+ CPS complaints, etc and have made many threats to take my child away. This anxiety inducing behavior is very bad. They are so focused on ruining my life and relationship with my child that it has cost me so much money and time away from my child. I have struggled with work and keeping up with my life. In addition, the damage they have done to my family is irreparable. They were granted visitation even though they are the step great-grandparents, but they are given many decision making rights over my child. My child is being used as a pawn, and then this is corrupting our lives. I am appealing this order, but I am considering suing my inlaws for all of this emotional and mental anguish.
The “expert,” opens up with “almost unthinkable for a mother to lose custody…” Absolutely perfect opening because it exposes the bias towards fathers. And this is coming from an expert who’s a man. God bless you for your inadvertent transparency.
That’s what makes it remarkable. The fact that it is so rare speaks volumes about how sexist the family court system is against men. I say this as a man that has 100% custody of my child.
@Nikki Bentley Is My Angel I sincerely am sorry that is your experience. I personally know so many wonderful fathers - hundreds of men that love their wives & children. This world would crumble without good fathers; they are so necessary.
@chuck wood exactly Chuck and I'm one of the unlucky guys who ended up having to deal with one of these crappy individual's I've been taking care of my daughter also since birth since you was born December 13th 2019 currently going through the process now I was trying to establish paternity and get some kind of custody
Ellis Maytham Amen. My son is going through this now. He loves his daughter. His ex won’t let him see her. She has been abusive to my son. She can’t see denying her daughter contact with her father. Is abusive to their daughter.
chuck wood Yeh. That’s mean. I think you meant men can be good parents too. Stop saying things that are generalized judgements and can be viewed about you too. Please. This isn’t about which gender is better. It’s about being a good parent. Your children are half your partner. If you hate women you will be destructive to your children. They are their mother too.
Nope, my boy is almost 14 and he wants to stay with me. We are moving six hours away and the biological father is upset even though Visitation isn’t changing much and we meet halfway he’s being ridiculous.
Nope, my boy is almost 14 and he wants to stay with me. We are moving six hours away and the biological father is upset even though Visitation isn’t changing much and we meet halfway he’s being ridiculous.
I’m so cordial with my sons father! I’m so accommodating for him to even see my son. And now out of no where he isn’t allowing my contact w my son and texted me that he isn’t coming back and that he has a protective order for them! If he wanted to get custody why didn’t you just go thru the court? But your sole focus is to keep me out his life! His mom that has been raising him his whole life! I’m so lost and scared that I will never see my baby again
I am going through the same thing right now! My ex called DFCS and falsely accused me of things and with no investigation the case worker awarded him custody and gave him permission to leave the state with my daughter! Now I have a court date in a different state scheduled in October and I don't even know what the accusations were to defend myself! I didn't find out he did this until I went to the sheriffs Dept to press charges for him taking her out of state and only then did I learn about the custody change with DFCS that I never seen signed by a judge but the investigator said there was nothing he could do! I feel so violated! How did they arrive at such a serious decision with only half a story? I wasn't given a fair or much less a chance at all! Nothing! I'm learning how to file a law suit myself for the emotional distress this has brought both me and my daughter because of their grossly negligent decisions mine and my daughters relationship has been damaged and sabatouged! I am pissed at all the lost time wasted of mine and my daughters life we can never get back that was so unnecessary. Only when they are made to be accountable will they learn to stop making these mistakes that are so damaging to the mental health of children for an indefinite amount of time. If they can accept appreciation then they should be able to accept criticism as well. I get so mad just thinking about it!! How dare her take away my biological rights without discussing it with me, notifying me, nothing!!! And then turn around and give him the go ahead to take off with my little girl out of state.. what in the hell was she thinking? She knew I was around my daughter because in the parenting plan it clearly states that if she leaves with me to call law enforcement. She believed every filthy word he said without batting an eye and fell hook, line, and sinker. These people need some serious training! If a child has two living parents discuss situation with both before you make a decision!!!!! Accept they're are liars in this world that unfortunately made it to be parents!!! It is the case workers responsibility to make the best decision for the child and if you can't do that well get someone that can! Don't just go out on a limb and hope for the best! Don't believe they have a goat just because one says they have a goat. Go look for yourself!!! I'm sorry for going off on a tangent but it frustrates me to no end and how such ignorancy there still is with this matter. New policies should have been made yesterday to stop this yet it keeps on and on and there is just no excuse for it. We're supposed to be smarter than this and more caring about human life than this yet we keep pussyfooting around like it's not important. I don't get it. When did teaching kids to hate their parents become acceptable and okay? And we wonder what has happened to our society? Why kids act out.. with the arise of narcissism now more than ever. The abuse from them is serious and some will go as far as murder. With over 158 million Americans effected by their abuse why is the effects on children being ignored and taking up so much time in our family courts? We don't turn our head on our veterans do we and pretend they don't need help? We don't turn our head on animal cruelty and pretend they don't need help? Foreign affairs? Why our children? Please someone help me understand why we haven't done one thing to stop this?! To prevent this?!
@@Lisa-ub6zl omg I’m going threw something slightly similar my heart is broken into pieces the system has failed me and my babies and idk for how much longer can my heart take 😔
In my situation, me and my ex-wife agree. That the courts took advantage of us. She was coached in the decisions that she's didn't want to do. In return she lost rights. Not only had to jump through hoops of life. But jump through someone else's hoops that has no connection or understanding. Child support is a corporation. By law and actually has nothing to do with the quality of life of the child. The House Always Wins
This video was nice but it just makes me mad that I'm even here, I just wanted a family. It's not that hard to just be a decent person. I just got this overwhelming feeling to have things be simple and normal because this is just too much. Together and happy it seems so simple.
Gabriella D, I am sorry for you disappointment. I always say simple is not easy. We can't control or dictate what another person does. I hope you find peace.
@gabriella d man you just don’t know I want my family too and I’m the man and most men just leave I didn’t I stayed and I tried I did everything I could and now I’m dealing with allegations of physical abuse of her and our son which is so untrue I love them both
Son's father has focused on me, it's just the beginning of my battle, my ex has just trashed me, and hasn't thought about our son, he abandoned me, took all the money and I absolutely don't know what to do, he's alienated me from our son and has the courts on his side, I have no attorney and he is just trashing me all over to get our son
Silver Seraph, this is so sad to hear. There is not reason and in the end, usually it hurts the one doing it when the child grows up and begins to see what happened.
I’m going to court to battle my husband Wednesday. He is an evil person who just wants to hurt me. It’s maddening because I know he can charm and talk his way out of anything. First time dealing with anything like this and I’m terrified because of all the allegations he’s made
I have full custody of my Daughter and I was awarded supervised visits at my discretion because my ex wife was on drugs and abandoned her and left for over 9 months and now is trying to get visits without paying child support or doing the required classes for visiting and is very verbally abusive so in that aspect what do I do
Ronnie Martin, I appreciate you watching Live On Purpose TV; please know that I cannot give specific legal advice. You can watch more of my child custody videos on this playlist: th-cam.com/play/PLq2mRDkHEBPBhTE4dbqLMBrRk8Uop0jgd.html, but that is all I can say. For more in-depth help, you would need an attorney to assist you with your case. Best wishes.
I’m one, separated from my children, court supported my estranged husband... 2001 gained temporary sole custody. He had immigration pick me up, processed and then took my kids out of state...even refusing to pay for court ordered guardian ad litem, and counsellors for my kids. We divorced in Dec 2006.
I'm such a fan of your content! While I'm a father going through a divorce/custody battle, I truly just enjoy your content as it is furthering my education as a parent. Regardless of any outcome, I believe in progress not perfection. So any knowledge to help me better coparent is more than welcome
I represented myself both times I was up against the fathers of my children-I couldn’t afford an attorney, and wound up doing it myself. What I learned is to win, which I managed each time, considering ANYONE’S benefit other than the child’s will not serve you well, and it shouldn’t. In the state of Utah, women rank in the bottom 5 states even it comes to having rights. This isn’t a discussion point, we’ve ALL seen it, unless you’re blind. However, when responsibility is sought for the child, irresponsible parents, whether female or male, will more than likely have a selfish glow that’s nearly visible. Occasionally, you’ll meet a parent whose ONLY interest is claiming something meaningful from the other person. With the most meaningful right being the children, unfortunately, this needs to be factored in. With one of my exes, that was the ONLY reason he fought for custody. Needless to say, the judge picked up on it. That ex hasn’t laid eyes on his beautiful daughter, living half an hour away, in over a decade. He hasn’t called for holidays or written cards for birthdays, because he’s selfish. Thank god that glowed! Remember, put your own differences aside for the interest of your child-not for custodial reasons; because that’s what your child deserves!
Mother of my child left home and took my child to a guys house that lives 5 hours away and put child support on me while we are pending a child custody court case
My daughters mother is a heroin addict / narcissist and has been keeping my daughter away from me the past month so that she could take me to court for not seeing my daughter. We split the driving 50/50 for the past 6 years and in January she lost her ability to drive so instead of finding another way to transport, she filed a restraining order to keep me away so that she could say I'm not around. Court is next Wed. None of her claims on the order are current. All are from our past relationship back in 2013. This is her claim for me not to be around. My daughter 10 year old doesn't agree. I have physical evidence of her heavy drug use, a CVS clerk where she left my child at the counter for 15 minutes while she went and got high in the car and video evidence of her boyfriend assaulting me. Any advice you can offer for the hearing next week?
Love your channel, it is absolutely purposeful & necessary. As for these 2 guys right here (a Physiologist & an Attorney) you guy's are intelligent both emotionally & cognitively. Thanks a lot and God bless you.
Motherhood is not just about pregnancy and giving birth. It's about having a genuinely God-like power and influence over a vulnerable, impressionable, brand-new human being. The infant's base brain circuitry is set for life for better or worse by mom. My brain is a fried mess today, thanks to you-know-who. I am so tired trying to heal myself and I still have half a lifetime to get through! I am exposing my children to as many real-life positive role models as possible as I am aware of my own inner issues and limitations from my own upbringing. As a result, my kids are awesome and make me so happy! I am so proud of them! I am tearing up just typing this in.
Being humble to feedback is hard for all of us but it's true.. You need to focus on self a bit. This is great content. I was a guardian ad Litem for a time. So get this..the kids need to not be put in the middle of the parents.
I was always video recording at every meet to get my kids. So one day my ex went ballistic, so I tried using the video footage in court, but later found out that its illegal in PA to record at the meet place.
Joint custody with children's dad. He's court ordered to get them every other weekend thur-sun since may 2018. Took them off his insurance 1 month after he was ordered to put them on. He doesn't call them. Doesn't know their teachers or doctor's names. Children are 5 and 7. He refuses to talk to me about the kids; constantly belittles and degrades me for not working like i used to. I want to move out of town where i'll have physical support so i can better provide for our children. He does pay child support, and makes more money now than when order went into effect. I don't want more money. I want him physically present. At the same time, i don't know how he'd treat them since he doesn't want them, (he's told me that). Our 5 year old had a twin brother who died at 3 days old from a heart defect.
How do you deal with a mother who withholds the child from visitation and won't obey court orders? Does it hurt your chances as a father if your child has been away from you for a long time? My ex even tries to say that "Our child can't find peace, is struggling and has a very bad reaction after visitation (which is a lie).. but everything is "perfect" and our child is striving when only mom is in the picture"..
Bob Hope, thank you for watching and being involved. Unfortunately, I am not able to give specific legal advice. However, my first thought is to remain positive through it all; easier said than done for sure, but remember you do have control over your emotions and actions. If you are worried about not staying involved in the child's life, try to work out with the mother if you can speak with your child over the phone and/or send cards or birthday gifts in the mail. As for the mother not obeying court orders, that is something the attorneys and legal system will need to work out. I would love to help where I can... I have a Child Custody playlist, if you want to check that out for more ideas: th-cam.com/play/PLq2mRDkHEBPBhTE4dbqLMBrRk8Uop0jgd.html. A couple videos that may be particularly relevant in your situation are "How To Have A Peaceful Joint Custody Agreement," and "Child Custody Mediation Strategies".
You can make that argument for anything. That does not mean It's done equally between the sexes. It's disingenuous to comment in such a way that makes it seem like that is the case.
I am to but stick with it there is light at the end of the tunnel. My sons mother believe it or not told me if I didn't marry her when I was 21 and now I'm 34 I would never see my child. Im soon upset but I know god knows the truth but I just got 50/50 custody of him few weeks ago. He is 13 now and I have missed everything. I wanted to learn to change diapers and feed him when I was younger and she always gave me broken promises about seeing him and then denied he was mines which I showed the judge. She showed her ass in court and argued with the attorney and the counselors advice. She even got mad about my wife's friends speaking about if my wife were around my son what they think. My sons mother thought they were trying to take my son from her but she don't even realize what is going on half the time. Here's the worst part every time I ask bout my son she always switch convo or flirts with me out the blue and she is married!!! She even ask me meet her at hotel and stuff. They tried to get me to pay $70k in back child support but it didn't happen and she denied all my help.
My baby mother is a deadbeat who doesn’t provide fir our daughter whatsoever. My daughter is 2 years old and she’s never had a job until now, only because the government provided her with housing so she has to pay rent. I have my 2 year old 24/7 and she comes to look at her like she’s a damn doll rather than a child. She has abandoned our child with me over 10x to where I had to put out missing person reports... I’ve been holding off for a over year not taking her to court for full custody just for the hope of her being here fir our daughter. In the end I still feel like a single father on the daily. It is definitely time for me to go to court, not for me, for this little girl
Hopefully, it’s not too late for me to fix these mistakes in my custody case!! Great points. 👏🏾 First time in front of a judge next month! Hopefully she just gives me a stern warning to stop my bad behavior towards the dad. 🤞🏾
Going to court scares me so much. We have an injunction right now and he has supervised visitation but they keep saying he’s going to go for 50/50 and it really terrifies me that he’ll get the kids more than I will. I love my kids with all my heart and I try my best to be an amazing parent
@@cheyennemccune7111 Why does it scare you that your children can possibly share equal time between both parents. This is why a lot of mother's are loosing custody or visitation time being leesen. You can be a perfect parent both the child still desrves to be equally with both parents as much as possible. A mother's love for her children does not superseide a father's love they are both equally important and needed. Mother automactilly feel like because we birthed the children well always deserve more of the child's time and love and thats not fair. I'm happy some court systems are finally starting to open their eyes up.
On the other hand, there are family members who ignore abuse. (The Home School Legal Defense Association protected many of us when we were home schooling. Just an anonymous tip, and your kids are seized without any due process: speedy hearing with impartial jury. There is some sort of human trafficking going on in reprobate courts. In Florida well-to-do elderly are taken and put under guardianship so the courts, guardians, and lawyers can munch on their wealth.)
I’m so scared. We are going start mediation next week and I’m hoping and praying for my stbx to come to this with an open mind, willing to compromise, realize that me and him are the parents (not the grandparents), and most importantly that it’s not about winning it’s about the kids (not what is convenient with him). He is trying to get full custody, majority parenting time, his mom as the babysitter/teacher because he doesn’t want them to go to school. And even if it hurts I want to do 50/50 with him because it’s what’s right for our girls.
Yes I do 50/50 0 I have my son Friday Saturday Monday morning to but dad stops me as he lied used my past against me..an£ he got temporary primary Carrer ,.
What if you have spent the last 8 years watching your child be endangered and your self being controlled with allegations stolen from cheated on and lied to? I struggle to treat my co parent with any respect after the treatment I have received from her and her parents.
mr machinist, I get what you are saying. You are also never wrong about how you feel, you are responsible for your behavior. It is natural to feel hurt when someone has lied and hurt our most precious relationships.
It happens to Moms too. Some people really know how to work attorneys like this who aren’t trained to work with those who undergo significant trauma and abuse but have remained the pro facia parent. But the court sure as heck better perform their due diligence and have all the necessary evidence in hand before making any assumptions.
The paradigm has shifted way to much for this fantasy of both parents working with each other when some one benefits from the one gets less and other gets more this just keeps you paying into this
Thank you my son has 2 baby moms that treat him this way one constantly wants to arrest him for kidnapping on his weekends when he takes his son around family member she don’t like... well the son told his father all what mother was doing and his mother has mental abuse him he is 12 and wants to go live with his dad and well I have had to fill child abuse charges on her cause my grandson texted me and begged me to please make mom stop hit and punching me and calling me names...Mammoo make her stop!!! My heart drop I had to send the police for a welfare check!!! My son can’t afford a lawyer DCH finally got involved and we are working on trying to get him
I’m currently going through a custody battle and due to the fact I have a criminal case pending to an alleged battery on an officer and my daughters dad, although I have no recollection. And him not knowing where I was but appeared there with a camera recording already. I honestly think someone roofied me & it wouldn’t surprise me if my daughters dad got someone to do his dirty deed. Now, he’s blackmailing me saying if I file paperwork I will lose all custody, in which I’m terrified. My daughter has always been with me since born, i breastfed for 3 years, and now she’s 5 and because I missed a court she was taken away from me over night and she is autistic. He doesn’t allow me to talk to her for weeks At a time. And now I only see her twice a month. I have filed numerous police Reports online of him violating our court order, I have a letter from his older sister stating My daughters best interest is with me. He’s had our autistic daughter hold a gun and So much more…I need help and I feel like mo one is hearing my cries for help!
I fought and won full custody of my son! She was stripped of all rights but to advise me of his best interest! Couldn’t come within 500 ft of us unless it’s supervised visits at my discretion and in a public place!
@@annaclusker2261 I had documentation and a great lawyer! I dug in deep and took all the mental abuse my ex gave out! My circumstances was on my side from the get go! She abused her oldest son and was caught by a tenant and was reported to cps and after their investigation they declared her unfit but I didn’t know that at the time! I had school records of sons absentees and they were overly excessive (28 days or more). She scheduled an mhmr (mental health evaluation) for her oldest and she was a no show and got documentation on it! She just flat out told me of her and her boyfriends sex life in detail! I caught her in lies and also she never appeared in hearings nor did what the judge ordered us to do! I went very deep into that rabbit hole to ensure I got custody of my son and still paying the price of the mental and emotional abuse I endured and this all happened in 2009! I would do it all over again for my son cause he has grown into an awesome man and is going to have a great career ahead of him and we both know that he wouldn’t have had that with her! Wish you luck
@@annaclusker2261 if he is not allowing visitation I would follow what the decree says and document several times he has failed to appear with your son and then seek help with legal counsel and action!
I have a detention report of verbal and physical child abuse against the mother of my kids who were took from her custody,, I want to know why if there is enough evidence to take our kids from her, WHY WAS SHE NOT CRIMINALLY CHARGED 🤔
Well, sometimes the father is the BETTER parent. My bf is alienated from his children because his ex wife is angry that he didn't want to work out things with her. She would hit him etc. Days before the actual incident his oldest child was saying he was going to miss his side of the family and it's been almost 2 years he hasn't seen them and she talks ill of him on Facebook
I hate that I have tried my hardest to get along with the father of my child and his wife, I have been vulnerable, apologized when I was in the wrong, and not given into their drama as much as I could with nothing in return… no child support, nothing for our child, and no apology(which is the least of my worries)… we haven’t been to court yet because he said he was going to settle and sign the order but he hasn’t… but even though he hasn’t signed the order I still give him visitation…. I have been dumb and went like a month without letting him see her, but again, no order hasn’t been signed…. He has been getting visitation now and I’m trying to do everything I’m supposed to do even though he hasn’t given me any support wish me luck on doing the right thing… yes I still mess up and feed into the drama and get annoyed at them because of all the stuff they say, but I’m trying to work it all out and I think it will get better after the court date next month.
This is Exactly what happened with our current custody battle. Evaluator sided with my husband and I over his two children. Mom is unwilling to admit any fault, recorded her children, all she talked about is what happened 10 years ago. We were very careful, respectful and henremained humble through this process and we are pleased it served him. I am thankful for your videos. Wish us luck we are nearing then end of year battle hopefully. Thank you again from Idaho
What if a mother has a second child from another Father and tells that child negative things about the child’s siblings Father? Dealing with custody battle, I was visiting the mom to see my child, and whenever she would leave the room, her 10 year old son would come out his room, stand there, to “supervise” me and return to his room when his mother came back. Is that not considered negative?
Sometimes a person might not "feel" it. But I can say after several decades of marriage to the same person, that it has a lot to do with action. Do you love your spouse? Then ACT like you do. Sometimes it must be really hard if there is abuse of family members or drugs or crazy spending, etc., but apart from that and maybe sometimes even then, many marriages could be restored and better than ever. ACT like you love the person you promised to love "till death do us part." Maybe it's because my parents & grandparents showed how it was done. I saw my grandma take grandpa out of the smoke shop by the ear; he was bent over saying, "Ouch, ouch, ouch!" Today in such a situation it would have been different, different language too. (Baron Montesquieu speaks of nations being destroyed by reprobation/demoralization/lack of virtue. 1962 & 1973 were huge steps in that direction for the USA.) What was the ear pulling about? Grandma was afraid Grandpa was going to gamble away the family farm. After that, he continued to visit the back of the smoke shop to play cards. Whether he was gambling big before or not, I do not know; but after that, it was just about cards. He would bring his winnings home in candy bars.
If you find yourself being consoled by your child or ostracized because of the other parents actions or hatred. How should the consoled or ostracized parent approach that with their child?
Seeking Justice, if I understand what you are asking, look at this situation as an opportunity for your child to use empathy and kindness, don't bring them any further into the situation or have them feel responsible in any way for what is happening. You can let your child know how you are sad and tell her hugs make you feel better. For a small child, this is enough.
I’ve tried time after time after time to repeatedly try and get my daughters mom to try and be close to my daughter she gave her to me a little over 6 months ago but she ultimately doesn’t want anything to do with my little girl so I pretty much give up on that we have court in about a month so fingers crossed I’ll get custody of her
I’m dealing with a narcissist and an abuser please I need help I wanna get child support and get full custody of my child my daughter dad can’t even cook for himself let alone feed my child he would rather spend money on beer than buy food for my kid and it’s his kid too he doesn’t deserve her at all I tried my hardest to keep him happy but he’s a narcissist and emotionally abusive I need help what can I do ?
So I don't know if anybody will read this, but in the divorce my ex-wife claimed 100% physical custody of my kids, and then my middle son told me, that Mom will spend two or three nights at a time, away from home. Should I see about getting the court to intervene? As a follow-up, a private investigator confirmed that she would spend two or three days away from home at a time.
What happens when the other still pursues a relationship with you when you don't want them back because they cheated.. They come by without calling, etc.. No boundaries..I get worried about stalking and them not having anything to do. When does the court see this for what it is and could become? And that they talk bad about your family, too.
Sherri Kins, if you are afraid you should get a restraining order so you have protection and it is documented. See an attorney for advice on this matter. Your safety is paramount.
This where I am. Custody battle in progress. I am tasked with developing a phased step up parenting plan. Meanwhile, the father is 100% on the smear campaign...
In my case my ex has put the kids in the middle he's been telling the children to keep secrets against me and continues to say negative comments I have not said anything about their father in front of them I rose above what has gone on he has been dishonest in court. I don't claim to be perfect I went through parenting classes and communication workshop with the court he hasn't been honest through the entire process unfortunately my ex has used them as pawns. I don't say anything to the children he's doing it unfortunately on purpose I haven't said anything unfortunately in my case there's conjugal abuse It's very difficult the court here doesn't look at it as a pattern of abuse I find it very difficult I'm being the better parent I'm legally not allowed to say anything in front of the kids I can't even say when they look unbathed and nails dirty and uncut I'm not even allowed at all I've been keeping a journal for behavior I've noticed, but say nothing to them of what I observe. My ex hasn't paid any child support hasn't brought them to doc appointments or dentists me and my parents it has fallen on our plates as extra responsibilities and expenses unfortunately It's documented in a binder for court I find the system here is very difficult he's stolen from me and has gotten the kids to steal and hasn't been honest I can't even ask the kids about the items I will not put my kids in the middle I love my kids with all my heart and will fight for them.
Robyn Edward, I appreciate you watching, however there is not much we can help you with in terms of legal advice. We have several videos on our Child Custody playlist - th-cam.com/play/PLq2mRDkHEBPBhTE4dbqLMBrRk8Uop0jgd.html, and I hope you can find some value there. Being a single parent is so hard; we also have a Positive Parenting playlist to help you out with that: th-cam.com/play/PLq2mRDkHEBPCclxt6agg3wrLBRkL7CCwU.html. You may particularly like "How To Be A Single Parent After Divorce" - th-cam.com/video/G4hjN5B1-AE/w-d-xo.html and "How To Make Ends Meet As A Single Parent" - th-cam.com/video/btNvSj7fOxQ/w-d-xo.html Best wishes.
@@t.c.2402 I told the truth in my case my ex didn't tell any truth he's the man It's been very difficult he said I left for 3 months and willing left him the lease in reality he changed the locks and booted me out I had to go buy shampoo and other items and stay in a hotel and buy clothes for court I have a bank statement to prove other things about what happened at the time. It was very difficult at the time we were one week custody and I'd leave when it wasn't my week he didn't care if I was homeless and lock the door handle to the handle I didn't have keys for preventing me from entering when we were both on the lease and yeah it wasn't good long story short he ended up stalking me and harassing me and ended up threatening me in the end I was able to get a restraining order and he's continuing to put the children in the middle on a brighter note I was able to get a lease in my name. I have to prove that the kids are in the middle on his side he wasn't honest to the social worker from the court and they believed him the problem with the system they aren't trained to deal with narrascist he's basically a Trump bullying and intimidation tactics I got stronger and didn't let him bring me down
I have a child that has just turned 8yrs old. I have him on Fridays after i finish work until Sunday then he goes home to his mother. A few weeks ago my son told me his mum sold little white bags out of her car. I took my son off her for a few weeks and then I tried to work things out because she had denied any knowledge. And now my son is back with his mother he is sleeping at her house, stays at her friend's and new boyfriends house. My son told me that he had stayed in his mums friend's bed with him and his mother but my sons mother stayed in the next room in the house.. my sons school phone me up whilst I'm working nearly everyday asking why my son is not in school. My son does not eat much or wash at home because his mother does not prompt him to. What should I do? Should I take his away from her and make her go to court? I am stressed everyday worrying where my son is and I have spoke to the social services, they just keep saying they think I should do what I think is right for my son they can't tell me what they think I should do. It would be really helpful for some good advice I don't really have anyone that can talk and help me out.. the social services have been on my sons mums back for a few years now and I have no bad records at all. Help me out please
I know you don't want to hear this, Ray, but you are the one that has to make the decision. What is holding you back if you are stressed or concerned? Figure out what that is and deal with it first so that you can decide and move on. You may need some help and can schedule a call with one of our coaches to help you, www.drpauljenkins.com/breakthroughcall.
Idk, my mom flagrantly violated all these. It was documented by 2 court appointed psychologists and the GAL. All my dad got was a court order for 2 days a week visitation. My experience has been women can literally kidnap their kids and flee the state in defiance of court orders, and still retain primary custody. But my experience is admittedly an anecdote
I have trial on a couple months, haven t been allowed to see my daughter in nearly 1 1/2 years. 5 years old. I have done no wrong and me and my daughter had a great relationship. I’m subbing because I need all the help I can get. Can’t afford a lawyer
Thank u guys so much for taking ur time to do this I have a daughter I lost years back turned my life around and got my children back its been 4 yrs so my oldest lives with her dad she calls her step mom mom and called me allison for a while she still calls her step mom mom im trying super hard to be supportive for my daughter but I will admit sometimes its super hard to not let my feelings get in the way but I dont know what to do she completely ignores me when we are all together. Itd total heart crushing can u please help with some advice
we are dealing with flying monkets. my partner has supervised phone calls and then supervisor is his daughter's baby sitter. 15 phone calls were missed and she has assisted the girl in leaving voice-mail wiht false and already recanted abuse accusations. we finally got a call on fathers day and the daughter told us that mom didn't want her to talk to dad. supervisor won't respond to messages asking to confirm this.
I have domestic violence being victim 4 years ago after 2 years fighting in the court the father win after that I lose my daughter get kill by his father none believe if my ex is violence thanks for the justice of getting making wrong choice
I have a case where my stepson keeps telling us he gets hit by his stepdad and whenever my husband brings it up, mom says dad is making up things because he is jealous of her new relationship. We’re currently dealing with cps because my stepson came with shoe imprints on his bottom and mom keeps saying her son is lying and that dad is putting things in his head. Her husband did admit to hitting him right in front of her but every time her son, 4, asks why do you let him hit me? Mom keeps calling him a liar. My stepson even told me once he knows his mom doesn’t like his dad but he does. So I’m sure there’s some parental alienation going on there. Any advice for us? We’ll be going to court as mom wants to modify a court order on his visitation being supervised because cps is investigating her husband and her for child abuse.
I got pregnant with my child’s biological father after knowing him for 5 weeks. He wasn’t involved with me much and I was trying to make him be involved. I moved in with him and his parents about 2 weeks before she was born. I found out he was on tinder. He was with me at hospital and name on birth certificate. I didn’t get along with his family and he barely helped me. I left him right after she had turned 1. I moved back in with my parents. He told me I had to co parent with him because children need a father. He asked me to co parent with him. He was verbally abusive to me when I was with him. He would always yell at me in front of my daughter. I left because of him being on tinder and because of all the yelling. He said I would have her 4 days and he would have her 3 days. It kind of worked up until he started seeing his ex. He then got engaged to his ex really fast. Then he moved in with her. After that happened he started changing the co parent plan. Every time I saw him he would say something negative to me. She started saying all these diff reasons how she was sick. At first it was believable. Then she started to say she didn’t want my daughter at her house if she had a cold or anything. Although if she got sick there she was sent back to me sick no exceptions. So sometimes my daughter would be with me 3 weeks in a row. Sometimes his mom would watch Lily too. But his fiancé continues to say she is sick. She said she had pink eye in her stomach. Said she was immune compromised. Said she had leukemia.said she had arthritis. Said she had cyhrosis of the liver. He told me I wasn’t aloud to date anyone else. I have to keep my relationship with my bf completely secret or else get yelled at by him and her. The last time I saw them, his fiancé was screaming at me saying I was trying to kill her because she woke up on a Saturday throwing up. They took my daughter to the er. She had a virus. Now they are saying they are taking me to court and going to take my daughter from me, but then also said they can’t see her for 6 weeks. I went on his fiances social media and she isn’t sick in any of her videos. She had a video of her making my daughter wrestle her son. Has a lot of videos about smoking weed. She had a video she went to the hospital for punching a wall, saying she has anger issues. My daughter told me her dad yells at her and she’s scared of him, and that he hits her. She is 4 so I don’t know what’s true or not. I was never out to get him. They seem to be out to get me. What do you do? I have a low income and when they said we are taking u to court and taking ur daughter away… I had suggested going to a mediator. But what I meant was like a family therapist. They just kept yelling at me and wouldn’t listen to Me. I have no idea what I’m supposed to do. My gynecologist had told me once, don’t worry about what he does, worry about your daughter. I tried to involve him with my child. What do you do? His fiancé forces my daughter to call her mama and she seems severely mentally ill and delusional. I’m not someone who is out to get people. I dotn have thousands of dollars to go to court. Does anyone have suggestions ?
You are giving them control where they don't have it. You will probably have to go to court to put a parenting plan into place and you don't need a lawyer for it, though it would be better to be represented. Keep a file with everything in it so you can present it to the court.
Me and my GF just moved from CA to NC in search of a better much more affordable lifestyle. We have a 7 month baby boy and want nothing but the best for him. In CA we where living with her moms now in NC we're living with my parents. She decided that it'll be better for us to move to NC sonner than what we had planned because she couldn't put up with her mom and dad anymore there was always problems amongst them and it was affecting our relationship. So we made the move i resigned my job made some calls and bought our tickets to NC. She would always say that moving in with my parents would better our relationship and we wouldn't be putting up with her families drama in CA and it wouldn't be toxic. Now that we're here in NC we found jobs and my parents love and care for my son and my GF . my mom always going above and beyond for us , cooking and cleaning for us and caring for my son which is something I've never felt from her family side and im happy here in NC. Long story short I've started to notice a change in her like she's always on her phone or sometimes it looks like she's mad and won't talk to anybody which makes it awkward because my family is full of joy and happiness. I brought it up to her attention and all hell broke loose started saying that im wrong for saying such things and that she's been doing everything for my son. So we stepped out the house because I didn't want my parents to hear us arguing so i had my mom look after my son and she told me exactly how shes been feeling lately, and how she doesnt feel the same for me anymore. Hearing her say that really hurt me so much being together for 3 years being the best father with my son and helping her throughout her pregnancy when her mother was really never there. She told me that my mom does so much for me like cook, clean and is very loving with my son and that she regrets moving so soon because her family back in CA didn't spend enough time with my son. She sees how happy my son is ever since we arrived at my parents and how caring they are with him and I think she gets jealous because her parents where never like that with my son and all of a sudden she wants to return back to CA back to the same family drama that she had before we moved to NC. We just have a month since we moved and I dont see her happy and im afraid that one day she'll decide to leave with my child back to CA and to try something sneaky behind my back. I honestly don't see our relationship lasting that long, and what can I do now before something like this can happen? Help plz 🙏
IvanDeeTerrible, please get some help with communicating for the two of you. If you do part ways, you need to be able to communicate so that both of you have a place in your child's life.
My ex has alienated my children from me and used the courts to take away my visitation. It is heartbreaking. I want a good relationship with my children AND my ex husband. I left him because we had a toxic relationship. He believes that because I’m an ex wife, I should be an ex mother. I haven’t seen my boys for a year and my daughter for 4 months. I have done all in my power including $30,000 in legal representation to try and get some visitation and am now waiting on reconciliation counseling. My ex has sabotaged it up until now.
Nikki Bentley Is My Angel My children are 24, 19 and 14. I moved next door so they could go back and forth. It is very hurtful to have people say things about circumstances they know nothing about. The trauma is bad enough that to be re traumatized again trying to explain is a huge trigger. When someone asks, how can children turn against a loving parent? Or what have you done that your children want nothing to do with you? Is heartbreaking. I love my children with all my heart and had a beautiful relationship with them up until I left my abusive spouse. He then used them as pawns.
@@suddenlyhope Not everyone believes as this other viewer does. I am very sorry to hear about your situation. I can't imagine the pain your heart must be going through. I sincerely hope that you can reconcile soon and be in your children's lives again. Despite evidence, the world isn't all bad. I love this channel, & hope you feel supported by Dr. Paul & his team, as so many of us do. 💚
Tecumseh A. Thank you for your kind words. Love and Kindness goes a long way in this world. I am grateful that God has got me this far. And I know he will be with me and show me how to reconcile and renew relationships with my children. I am praying for them daily.
@@suddenlyhope I love your attitude & faith. 🙂 Please don't take this as being preachy... think of it as a friendly reminder, as I'm sure you've heard this before. Remember: God's timing is not our timing. I prayed for 12 years to have children with my husband. Finally He gave them to me, & I spent the next 8 years praying for help to be a good parent! 😆 Then He directed me to Live On Purpose TV. It's so hard to be patient when we want good things, but the Lord's timing will serve us best in the end. Merry Christmas to you. 🎄
SuddenlyHope, it sounds like you love your children very much and are trying to have a positive relationship with them. That is great. Keep that up, even tough it's hard. I have a whole Child Custody playlist; if you want to see if there is anything more helpful, please check it out: th-cam.com/play/PLq2mRDkHEBPBhTE4dbqLMBrRk8Uop0jgd.html Thank you for watching, and best wishes.
Mine is so much diffrent my children are with md as a dad on and exparte because moms boyfriend is under investigation of sexualy assault of my 2 and 4 year old girls she never left him tryed to help financially or emotionally still with man under investigation kids are with me the father till november 20 th for final hearing
"It would be best if they could co-parent or parallel parent" Yeah no duh. But if the two people were capable of cooperating, they would still be together.
Stricken Baseball Series, not always. I have seen people who can't get along being married, but are able to successfully co parent. They have to be mature and focused.
No that's totally different. We're not married anymore, so he may treat me like crap and I stay friendly and obedient, as long as I can see my kids. When we were married I would get mad. Now I say yes sir. What do I care? Over the years he started to treat me quite normal.
I need help with a When vindictive mother makes false claims and statements leaves them on talking parents and I’m stuck with: 1) Not to respond to it and dose it look like I accepted her claim? 2) Response in the attempt to professionally defuse the conflicting conversation of false statements in somewhat defend myself?
This was good info but I feel like I have special surcomstance in obeying the court order, let me explain. I take my daughter out for the exchange as the court order requires it to be at curbside of the home. Her father parks down the road at someone else’s residence and will not park at mine, then when my daughter fights me about going and I keep saying why and you say you have fun when your there and it’s your dads time she just cries. I ask for his assistance and he threatens to file contempt and has, we are going to court for it, but then says if she doesn’t get into his car with 15 min he’ll leave and file contempt. Now he is using that against me trying to get full custody, they have combined the contempt and the custody trial. I don’t understand, I did everything I could to get her to go aside from dragging her and throwing her in his car, I did record it. He tries to create situations and say I’m not following the court order. Just something for you guys to think about I guess. Not sure what that means but I even ground my daughter when she does this because he is not listening and that still doesn’t help. Side note, my daughter has also been diagnosed by a court appointed evaluator to have separation anxiety.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV Thank you, and I plan on it. I guess I was rambling a bit bc it makes me feel like I’m doing something wrong at the same time knowing I’m not, I’m honestly trying to do my best to work with the other parent so it’s just stressful and I know if it is on me I can only imagine the kiddos!
What about when there's DV involved and the other parent is actually a concern? I have a protection order against dad, but I still want whatever is best for baby, so I play his game and try to co-parent. Whatever happened between he and I isn't my child's fault, but he isn't a safe person for me. He's also in another state where the PO isn't able to be enforced...
sadrina mota, I do appreciate you watching, but there is little I can do. You would be best off finding an attorney to help you with this situation. We do have a free coaching call available, if you would like to try that. It won't help you with your case, but possibly the way you are dealing with it internally, psychologically. You could try to schedule a call with my guest in the video, Sid Unrau who is an attorney and a coach. Here's the link: DrPaulJenkins.com/breakthroughcall
i have an established court order and it is 50/50 with my daughters mom since 2015 . for years she has not complied and i know i should have took legal action sooner . but she moved out of riverside county to san diego county without a 45 day notice which is required in our orders.. she wants to switch her schools also and i do not agree . we both agreed on where she would go to school back in 2018.. i have now filed for modification of child custody and visitation and put in my stipulation that i would want to have our daughter majority of the time and put in it as well each violation of non compliance in our agreement and provided proof through text messages. i hope this works . i have majority custody not through court for a month now which is m-f and mother has her on the weekends only ..
What do you do when the other parent is an abuser and an alcoholic? My wife and I have been together for 6 years and have I have a strong relationship with her 2 daughters. There mom lost custodial to their dad who berated, beat, and stalked her while they were together and afterwards. She had no lawyer and he had a lawyer. The house they bought together went to him cause he only put it in his name. He is just a trash person. He constantly tried to drage the kids into every little disagreement. He has called the police because they girls didnt want to speak to him during our custody. The kids gave even asked me if I could be their dad instead which breaks my heart. We have tried co parenting with him it is impossible. We invite him to their birthday parties and I even had to kick him out omce because he slapped the oldest daughter. I really could use some advice. No idea how we could get custody back so the girls dont have to keep suffering in that toxic alcoholic environment.
My girl wants to move out of town with her mom because shes going to be lonely and also takes my kids away from me. We dont have problems at all but what am not agree on is that my girl choose her mom 1st instead of me. I mean we have a family we supposed to stay together and not living with their parents but she dont want to leave her mom... What you guys think i need a suggestion???
3 years now my ex says shes moving to texas from Kansas and my 10 yr old daughter says she doesn't want to go to texas and say with me. 3 times my ex moved and I had my daughter 3 times she moved back later in the year and took kid back. I still pay support to mom and I've never got to claim kid on taxes. 2020 was a hard year financially I recieved no child credit or stimulus or claimed kid. Mom did. I was not behind until end of 2020 on support. Now they are taking my return for arrears and a bill from the mom when we were married 10 yrs ago and a tag on car violation from 2013. I've had tags every year since thin and renewed license never was informed of violation. Now all tax return is gone to ex and state. I've recently seen where irs and state only abide by state when it pertains to the mom benefiting. I drive every weekend or every other weekend and its 8 hrs of driving shes never made the drive except 1 time since divorce. I'm at my end. I have 1 other kid over 20 with another woman and I never was allowed to claim kid even with court order custodial has to fill out a form allowing me to claim . Court has no power I guess and she left for 8 years. Judge said he couldn't do anything. And whe my ex takes daughter back it's a few months and a phone number change and talking to her friends before contact is established and I get to see my kid again. I've seen how worse the rules have gotten I've tried for over 20 years to be a dad. It does get frustrating.
We do not have a current custody order and me and my ex live in 2 different counties. The kids were going to school in my county for the past 10 years. 6 years in this current county. He has now kept them in cyber and I haven’t seen them in person for 64 days. I’m guessing I will definitely get them back but this is taking way too long. Mother’s Day is in a few days and he said he needs to ask his lawyer if the girls should see me. It’s sick. I’m waiting on a court hearing for an Expedited Answer and Counter Claim that I put in. It’s been 3 weeks since that.
I wish there were no alienation, ann kogut. It would be wonderful if both parents loved their children, and the children loved both parents, and the parents were respectful. Even after divorce, there can be love. Thanks for watching.
I live in nh my mom accused me of things that never happened all she has is hearsay but i have evidence she is lying? How common would a judge decide to not give my daughter back?
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What If My Child Just Doesn't Care About Consequences - th-cam.com/video/Eu9_EXaVzOo/w-d-xo.html
This works great if you’re NOT dealing with a Narcissist!!! You guys have no idea how hard it is to work with them. They are impossible!!
Claudia Coury, I do feel your pain, I have worked with narcissists in my practice. Hang in there for the kids.
exactly. My husbands wife is a narcisist. OMG it's impossible. They suck your energy and they are never satisfied
@@dispertamenina STAY STRONG, STAY CALM AND WITH CONFIDENCE. HAVE GOOD BOUNDARIES! TREAT THEM FAIRLY REGARDLESS OF HOW THEY ACT. YOUR KIDS ARE WATCHING 💖💖💖🙏🙏🙏
@@LiveOnPurposeTV I get you. I’m going CRAZY
@@LiveOnPurposeTV have you worked with Covert Narcissists? So baffling...
I’m going through this right now. 100% spot on. Mother constantly accuses me of disgusting things. It’s so sad that good dads (or moms) have to go through stuff like this.
Ernesto Moraila, it really is. It just makes everything more difficult for everyone.
@Mister Incognito attack after attack, I stay strong for my baby
@Mister Incognito always man. Thanks for the advise 🙏🏼
Then recommend a change in custody, problem solved. But you don’t as it’s “traumatic” for the child. It is only traumatic if the decision would be in favour of the child father relationship. Who snatched away the child first and makes accusations and establishes a new status quo “wins”. You (custody evaluators) could change it but you don’t.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. My son is going through the same issues. My son doesn’t even have his name on the back and the woman is stating my son is abusive with no merit.
I’m am a father with residential custody. I went to pick up my kids for my parenting time and their mother had moved out of state, 1,250 miles away from me. So, it can be done guys. Document everything and follow the court order to a T. I even went as far as completely quitting drinking. Also, hire an attorney! Focus on your kids. They’re only kids for a short time. Good luck guys!
Thank you for encouraging others. Glad it worked out for you.
Were you completely dependent on drinking? Like were you sick?
This is an excellent video, far too many parents in this situation are more concerned with "winning" than they are with what is best for the child.
Alex Magnus, agreed. We don't want to be keeping score with our children.
That's because we have a antiquated judicial system.
I’m sincerely dealing with that mess . First court date Wednesday
Alex your so right in my case the other parent lying manipulation just to win I have been honest from the beginning and will fight for the best interests of our kids Emotionally abuse is not whats best by any child their not a trophy to win our actions effect our children. Your so correct I'm sticking with facts honesty and truth and facts and our kids are all that matters in all this
@@dc3011 hope it went well. I am 2 days away from round 2. Stay strong either way. I’m a father and this sucks. Children always loose in this crap.
We give God all the glory. I have gone to court on two other different cases without a lawyer and won. There are times when a lawyer is needed, so let the Holy Spirit lead you. Prayer and fasting always work for directions. You never, never assume anything. Always seek the Lord's face before you do anything legally. Chaplain Hope
Thank you.
Amen .
Yes!
I agree Amen!
Amen
I have a friend and her ex-husband who honestly handled custody of their daughter better than anyone! These two despised each other, their divorce was a nightmare. Then came custody, they turned into very different people. Dad stayed in the home, Mom moved two blocks away. Their daughter was 14 at the time of the divorce, at the time it was safe for the child to walk between the two homes. Basically the child lived with Mom, but could go to Dad's anytime and often stayed overnight at Dad's during the week or weekends. Both parents were able to constructively talk to each other when it came to their daughter. When it came to money again no issues, Dad offered to pay support but Mom was able to take care of her own bills. In the end both patents just equally bought things as needed, paid fees or whatever again somehow both parents were able to communicate. I believe they both understood they were equally responsible for paying their daughter's bills. If my friend had unexpected bills, her ex had no problem paying for things that my friend usually paid.
Weirdest thing that they could make parenting work but not their relationship.
Melissa Now, this is a rare story in the world of divorce and parenting. It is wonderful to know the adults are acting mature and working together. Think of the lesson their child learned.
Great point. More situations would be easier if the parents put their children's needs first.
unfortunately the state is incentivized financially to put one of the parents on child support regardless of what the parents agree on. also in many states, the judges are also financially incentivized to do this. CSEAs have been turned into money farms for the state... policy has supplanted morality
There are parents who are highly manipulative; I'm dealing with one. All custody evaluators and GAL's should have extensive trauma and psychological abuse training.
Von, agreed. Over time most learn to see the signs. Good luck!
I know how you feel. My ex is narcissistic and lies so much to make everyone else to be the cause of all problems. Never received my day infront of the judge and now I've given up all rights to them to rid myself and my future of the ex and her destructive nature.
@@coltonbrown3282 nobody should have to do that, but sometimes it is the best decision.
@@coltonbrown3282 omg! My husband is in the same situation with his ex wife
@@coltonbrown3282 I'm about to do the same. Really sucks.
I think using custody to enforce court orders when it is detrimental to the child is wrong. I think the proper way to deal with disobedience of court orders is with a contempt petition. In my case, from day one my daughter's dad lied and also asked for court orders just so he could claim I was violating them. He actually filed a petition for contempt which was totally bogus, but within a few months I was violating orders. So he supplemented the contempt petition. I got some gag orders overturned on appeal, but you are supposed to follow them until they are overturned. I cannot follow a court order if it is going to hurt my daughter mire in the long run. Sometimes having custody is not the most important thing, protecting the child from additional trauma is. The courts really failed us, but I trusted the system at first and was compliant and cooperative. When I figured out what was going on, I had to push back. In my case, we had never been married. We worked from an agreed order until our daughter was old enough to go to school and then he decided to cut me out of her life. I could not afford a lawyer and he had one that lied with impunity. I always supported my daughter's relationship with her dad. He completely erased me. I am appealing the latest custody modification order. I can see very easily why some parents walk away. I have known many parents whose children were torn apart like a piece of meat two dogs were fighting over. Some kids committed suicide or ended up in mental hospitals. It is so sick.
Lydia Hubbell, I hope you are able to prevail, I know this is a tough time for you and I sympathize with your plight. You are right that our children need to know that we love them no matter what.
Im so sorry this happened to you. I appreciate your recognition of “what is best for the child”. It’s like the old bi me tale of the women who said “cut the child in half” . The king knew immediately she was not the mother. A mother will walk away before inflicting more pain
My in-laws are acting so much like that mother, who is completely obsessed with what I do. My inlaws reach out to family members of mine that don't like me, and they have made 10+ CPS complaints, etc and have made many threats to take my child away. This anxiety inducing behavior is very bad. They are so focused on ruining my life and relationship with my child that it has cost me so much money and time away from my child. I have struggled with work and keeping up with my life. In addition, the damage they have done to my family is irreparable. They were granted visitation even though they are the step great-grandparents, but they are given many decision making rights over my child. My child is being used as a pawn, and then this is corrupting our lives. I am appealing this order, but I am considering suing my inlaws for all of this emotional and mental anguish.
I can't believe CPS hasn't caught on to what they are doing. Having no finding in the 10+ incidents will help you.
The “expert,” opens up with “almost unthinkable for a mother to lose custody…” Absolutely perfect opening because it exposes the bias towards fathers. And this is coming from an expert who’s a man. God bless you for your inadvertent transparency.
Just my experience working in the court system.
That’s what makes it remarkable. The fact that it is so rare speaks volumes about how sexist the family court system is against men. I say this as a man that has 100% custody of my child.
A woman is not necessarily the best person to look after a child. Sometimes the man is the better parent
Ellis Maytham, I agree. The child needs to know that both parents love them and are there for them.
@Nikki Bentley Is My Angel I sincerely am sorry that is your experience. I personally know so many wonderful fathers - hundreds of men that love their wives & children. This world would crumble without good fathers; they are so necessary.
@chuck wood exactly Chuck and I'm one of the unlucky guys who ended up having to deal with one of these crappy individual's I've been taking care of my daughter also since birth since you was born December 13th 2019 currently going through the process now I was trying to establish paternity and get some kind of custody
Ellis Maytham Amen. My son is going through this now. He loves his daughter. His ex won’t let him see her. She has been abusive to my son. She can’t see denying her daughter contact with her father. Is abusive to their daughter.
chuck wood Yeh. That’s mean. I think you meant men can be good parents too. Stop saying things that are generalized judgements and can be viewed about you too. Please. This isn’t about which gender is better. It’s about being a good parent. Your children are half your partner. If you hate women you will be destructive to your children. They are their mother too.
I know several instances where older children, usually around twelve, decide to go live with the other parent, usually dad.
Osman Vincent, it happens.
Nope, my boy is almost 14 and he wants to stay with me. We are moving six hours away and the biological father is upset even though Visitation isn’t changing much and we meet halfway he’s being ridiculous.
Nope, my boy is almost 14 and he wants to stay with me. We are moving six hours away and the biological father is upset even though Visitation isn’t changing much and we meet halfway he’s being ridiculous.
@@MrNMrsBundythis is called an anecdote, you can’t simply say “nope”
I’m so cordial with my sons father! I’m so accommodating for him to even see my son. And now out of no where he isn’t allowing my contact w my son and texted me that he isn’t coming back and that he has a protective order for them! If he wanted to get custody why didn’t you just go thru the court? But your sole focus is to keep me out his life! His mom that has been raising him his whole life! I’m so lost and scared that I will never see my baby again
I am sorry you are going through this, it is so painful not to be able to see your son. I hope you can work through this.
I am going through the same thing right now! My ex called DFCS and falsely accused me of things and with no investigation the case worker awarded him custody and gave him permission to leave the state with my daughter! Now I have a court date in a different state scheduled in October and I don't even know what the accusations were to defend myself! I didn't find out he did this until I went to the sheriffs Dept to press charges for him taking her out of state and only then did I learn about the custody change with DFCS that I never seen signed by a judge but the investigator said there was nothing he could do! I feel so violated! How did they arrive at such a serious decision with only half a story? I wasn't given a fair or much less a chance at all! Nothing! I'm learning how to file a law suit myself for the emotional distress this has brought both me and my daughter because of their grossly negligent decisions mine and my daughters relationship has been damaged and sabatouged! I am pissed at all the lost time wasted of mine and my daughters life we can never get back that was so unnecessary. Only when they are made to be accountable will they learn to stop making these mistakes that are so damaging to the mental health of children for an indefinite amount of time. If they can accept appreciation then they should be able to accept criticism as well. I get so mad just thinking about it!! How dare her take away my biological rights without discussing it with me, notifying me, nothing!!! And then turn around and give him the go ahead to take off with my little girl out of state.. what in the hell was she thinking? She knew I was around my daughter because in the parenting plan it clearly states that if she leaves with me to call law enforcement. She believed every filthy word he said without batting an eye and fell hook, line, and sinker. These people need some serious training! If a child has two living parents discuss situation with both before you make a decision!!!!! Accept they're are liars in this world that unfortunately made it to be parents!!! It is the case workers responsibility to make the best decision for the child and if you can't do that well get someone that can! Don't just go out on a limb and hope for the best! Don't believe they have a goat just because one says they have a goat. Go look for yourself!!! I'm sorry for going off on a tangent but it frustrates me to no end and how such ignorancy there still is with this matter. New policies should have been made yesterday to stop this yet it keeps on and on and there is just no excuse for it. We're supposed to be smarter than this and more caring about human life than this yet we keep pussyfooting around like it's not important. I don't get it. When did teaching kids to hate their parents become acceptable and okay? And we wonder what has happened to our society? Why kids act out.. with the arise of narcissism now more than ever. The abuse from them is serious and some will go as far as murder. With over 158 million Americans effected by their abuse why is the effects on children being ignored and taking up so much time in our family courts? We don't turn our head on our veterans do we and pretend they don't need help? We don't turn our head on animal cruelty and pretend they don't need help? Foreign affairs? Why our children? Please someone help me understand why we haven't done one thing to stop this?! To prevent this?!
@@Lisa-ub6zl omg I’m going threw something slightly similar my heart is broken into pieces the system has failed me and my babies and idk for how much longer can my heart take 😔
Same situation Sus
@@Lisa-ub6zl same sus
In my situation, me and my ex-wife agree. That the courts took advantage of us. She was coached in the decisions that she's didn't want to do. In return she lost rights. Not only had to jump through hoops of life. But jump through someone else's hoops that has no connection or understanding. Child support is a corporation. By law and actually has nothing to do with the quality of life of the child. The House Always Wins
Mr. Fox, I am glad you and your wife agree and hopefully you are working everything out.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV I appreciate the videos, research is the key to understanding situations.
This video was nice but it just makes me mad that I'm even here, I just wanted a family. It's not that hard to just be a decent person. I just got this overwhelming feeling to have things be simple and normal because this is just too much. Together and happy it seems so simple.
Gabriella D, I am sorry for you disappointment. I always say simple is not easy. We can't control or dictate what another person does. I hope you find peace.
I feel you
@gabriella d man you just don’t know I want my family too and I’m the man and most men just leave I didn’t I stayed and I tried I did everything I could and now I’m dealing with allegations of physical abuse of her and our son which is so untrue I love them both
@@donovancarney dam g , u tripping
Son's father has focused on me, it's just the beginning of my battle, my ex has just trashed me, and hasn't thought about our son, he abandoned me, took all the money and I absolutely don't know what to do, he's alienated me from our son and has the courts on his side, I have no attorney and he is just trashing me all over to get our son
Silver Seraph, this is so sad to hear. There is not reason and in the end, usually it hurts the one doing it when the child grows up and begins to see what happened.
I'm somewhat in the same boat any advice?
I’m going to court to battle my husband Wednesday. He is an evil person who just wants to hurt me. It’s maddening because I know he can charm and talk his way out of anything. First time dealing with anything like this and I’m terrified because of all the allegations he’s made
@@dc3011 how did it all go in the court please? Did the judge saw through his lies?
Malicious parent syndrome is a very real thing.
And damaging.
Everything you’ve said is happening to me and I’m the mom. His focus is me and not the child. But they gave him physical custody of my kid
I am sorry you are going through this. I hope you still have time with your child.
I have full custody of my Daughter and I was awarded supervised visits at my discretion because my ex wife was on drugs and abandoned her and left for over 9 months and now is trying to get visits without paying child support or doing the required classes for visiting and is very verbally abusive so in that aspect what do I do
Ronnie Martin, I appreciate you watching Live On Purpose TV; please know that I cannot give specific legal advice. You can watch more of my child custody videos on this playlist: th-cam.com/play/PLq2mRDkHEBPBhTE4dbqLMBrRk8Uop0jgd.html, but that is all I can say. For more in-depth help, you would need an attorney to assist you with your case. Best wishes.
Thank you so much, my brother is going through something similar and I think this is encouraging.
Hope it helps. Glad you are there for him.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV Yeah, he is having a very hard time and I hope my brother definitely makes good improvements.
I’m one, separated from my children, court supported my estranged husband... 2001 gained temporary sole custody. He had immigration pick me up, processed and then took my kids out of state...even refusing to pay for court ordered guardian ad litem, and counsellors for my kids. We divorced in Dec 2006.
I am sorry for the tough time you endured, Claire Will. I hope you will be able to see your kids again.
I'm such a fan of your content! While I'm a father going through a divorce/custody battle, I truly just enjoy your content as it is furthering my education as a parent. Regardless of any outcome, I believe in progress not perfection. So any knowledge to help me better coparent is more than welcome
Wow, thank you! I think you will have a fantastic relationship with your children, Boss Ton.
I represented myself both times I was up against the fathers of my children-I couldn’t afford an attorney, and wound up doing it myself. What I learned is to win, which I managed each time, considering ANYONE’S benefit other than the child’s will not serve you well, and it shouldn’t. In the state of Utah, women rank in the bottom 5 states even it comes to having rights. This isn’t a discussion point, we’ve ALL seen it, unless you’re blind. However, when responsibility is sought for the child, irresponsible parents, whether female or male, will more than likely have a selfish glow that’s nearly visible. Occasionally, you’ll meet a parent whose ONLY interest is claiming something meaningful from the other person. With the most meaningful right being the children, unfortunately, this needs to be factored in. With one of my exes, that was the ONLY reason he fought for custody. Needless to say, the judge picked up on it. That ex hasn’t laid eyes on his beautiful daughter, living half an hour away, in over a decade. He hasn’t called for holidays or written cards for birthdays, because he’s selfish. Thank god that glowed! Remember, put your own differences aside for the interest of your child-not for custodial reasons; because that’s what your child deserves!
Thank you for sharing and helping us remember what is important.
Not only that they moved so that way I couldn't find them or find out where my son is
sadrina mota, does your ex have family or friends that would be willing to help you locate him?
Mother of my child left home and took my child to a guys house that lives 5 hours away and put child support on me while we are pending a child custody court case
I hope you can see your child and continue your relationship.
I watched all the way through, my ex is the one I have to worry about this happening, he's wanting to battle this out
Silver Seraph, so much is lost, money, time, relationships when we go to battle. I hope he changes his mind.
My daughters mother is a heroin addict / narcissist and has been keeping my daughter away from me the past month so that she could take me to court for not seeing my daughter.
We split the driving 50/50 for the past 6 years and in January she lost her ability to drive so instead of finding another way to transport, she filed a restraining order to keep me away so that she could say I'm not around.
Court is next Wed. None of her claims on the order are current. All are from our past relationship back in 2013. This is her claim for me not to be around. My daughter 10 year old doesn't agree.
I have physical evidence of her heavy drug use, a CVS clerk where she left my child at the counter for 15 minutes while she went and got high in the car and video evidence of her boyfriend assaulting me.
Any advice you can offer for the hearing next week?
Have your information showing that you are available and she has withheld the daughter ready to go.
Love your channel, it is absolutely purposeful & necessary. As for these 2 guys right here (a Physiologist & an Attorney) you guy's are intelligent both emotionally & cognitively. Thanks a lot and God bless you.
Wow, thank you!
Motherhood is not just about pregnancy and giving birth. It's about having a genuinely God-like power and influence over a vulnerable, impressionable, brand-new human being. The infant's base brain circuitry is set for life for better or worse by mom. My brain is a fried mess today, thanks to you-know-who. I am so tired trying to heal myself and I still have half a lifetime to get through! I am exposing my children to as many real-life positive role models as possible as I am aware of my own inner issues and limitations from my own upbringing. As a result, my kids are awesome and make me so happy! I am so proud of them! I am tearing up just typing this in.
citizenspace71, you are the mother your children need.
Being humble to feedback is hard for all of us but it's true.. You need to focus on self a bit. This is great content. I was a guardian ad Litem for a time. So get this..the kids need to not be put in the middle of the parents.
Jeannie Salinas, that is my wish, kids not to be used as pawns. Happens way too often. Thank you for your work as an ad Litem, not an easy job.
You two are way better then any professional iv met, help wise... For my whole proceedings currently two and a bit years..... very informative
Candice Jaid, thank you.
I was always video recording at every meet to get my kids. So one day my ex went ballistic, so I tried using the video footage in court, but later found out that its illegal in PA to record at the meet place.
Rip Van Winkle, I wasn't aware of that. I wish you luck.
Joint custody with children's dad. He's court ordered to get them every other weekend thur-sun since may 2018. Took them off his insurance 1 month after he was ordered to put them on. He doesn't call them. Doesn't know their teachers or doctor's names. Children are 5 and 7. He refuses to talk to me about the kids; constantly belittles and degrades me for not working like i used to. I want to move out of town where i'll have physical support so i can better provide for our children. He does pay child support, and makes more money now than when order went into effect. I don't want more money. I want him physically present. At the same time, i don't know how he'd treat them since he doesn't want them, (he's told me that). Our 5 year old had a twin brother who died at 3 days old from a heart defect.
She Monique, get clear on what you control and what you don't. Stay in the control lane.
I'm going through this right now my son is 4 years old and it sucks when they focused on you
Gerald Hill, it is a tough situation no matter the age. Stay strong, you can get through this.
How do you deal with a mother who withholds the child from visitation and won't obey court orders?
Does it hurt your chances as a father if your child has been away from you for a long time? My ex even tries to say that "Our child can't find peace, is struggling and has a very bad reaction after visitation (which is a lie).. but everything is "perfect" and our child is striving when only mom is in the picture"..
Bob Hope, thank you for watching and being involved.
Unfortunately, I am not able to give specific legal advice. However, my first thought is to remain positive through it all; easier said than done for sure, but remember you do have control over your emotions and actions. If you are worried about not staying involved in the child's life, try to work out with the mother if you can speak with your child over the phone and/or send cards or birthday gifts in the mail. As for the mother not obeying court orders, that is something the attorneys and legal system will need to work out. I would love to help where I can... I have a Child Custody playlist, if you want to check that out for more ideas: th-cam.com/play/PLq2mRDkHEBPBhTE4dbqLMBrRk8Uop0jgd.html. A couple videos that may be particularly relevant in your situation are "How To Have A Peaceful Joint Custody Agreement," and "Child Custody Mediation Strategies".
This works in reverse too. Men engage in this alienation conduct. They are describing parent alienation with calling it that.
Ellen Henderson, parental alienation is wrong, no matter who is doing it.
I would pin 📌 this comment.
You can make that argument for anything. That does not mean It's done equally between the sexes. It's disingenuous to comment in such a way that makes it seem like that is the case.
Man stfu everything works in reverse when talkin about women 🤦🏾♂️
You should start addressing the real problem which is the system that creates a situation where only one parent can win and they other has to pay
Angus Gow, there are problems in the system and imperfect people.
I'm dealing with parental alienation RN. This video helped.
I am glad the video helped. I wish you the best.
Good luck, I'm going through the same thing.
I am to but stick with it there is light at the end of the tunnel.
My sons mother believe it or not told me if I didn't marry her when I was 21 and now I'm 34 I would never see my child. Im soon upset but I know god knows the truth but I just got 50/50 custody of him few weeks ago. He is 13 now and I have missed everything.
I wanted to learn to change diapers and feed him when I was younger and she always gave me broken promises about seeing him and then denied he was mines which I showed the judge.
She showed her ass in court and argued with the attorney and the counselors advice. She even got mad about my wife's friends speaking about if my wife were around my son what they think. My sons mother thought they were trying to take my son from her but she don't even realize what is going on half the time.
Here's the worst part every time I ask bout my son she always switch convo or flirts with me out the blue and she is married!!! She even ask me meet her at hotel and stuff.
They tried to get me to pay $70k in back child support but it didn't happen and she denied all my help.
Me too. 30 days today no contact and she changed all there cell phones when I was paying or all the phones.
My husband is too but she messed up big time, now we have a very high chance of FULL CUSTODY 😭😭❤️😭❤️❤️❤️😭❤️
My baby mother is a deadbeat who doesn’t provide fir our daughter whatsoever. My daughter is 2 years old and she’s never had a job until now, only because the government provided her with housing so she has to pay rent. I have my 2 year old 24/7 and she comes to look at her like she’s a damn doll rather than a child. She has abandoned our child with me over 10x to where I had to put out missing person reports... I’ve been holding off for a over year not taking her to court for full custody just for the hope of her being here fir our daughter. In the end I still feel like a single father on the daily. It is definitely time for me to go to court, not for me, for this little girl
I wish you the best. Glad you are there for your daughter.
Hopefully, it’s not too late for me to fix these mistakes in my custody case!! Great points. 👏🏾
First time in front of a judge next month! Hopefully she just gives me a stern warning to stop my bad behavior towards the dad. 🤞🏾
Jess H, be calm and respectful. You can get through this.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV Thanks for the advice and all the helpful videos. It all turned out in my favor! 🙌🏾🙌🏾
Going to court scares me so much. We have an injunction right now and he has supervised visitation but they keep saying he’s going to go for 50/50 and it really terrifies me that he’ll get the kids more than I will. I love my kids with all my heart and I try my best to be an amazing parent
@@cheyennemccune7111 Why does it scare you that your children can possibly share equal time between both parents. This is why a lot of mother's are loosing custody or visitation time being leesen. You can be a perfect parent both the child still desrves to be equally with both parents as much as possible. A mother's love for her children does not superseide a father's love they are both equally important and needed. Mother automactilly feel like because we birthed the children well always deserve more of the child's time and love and thats not fair. I'm happy some court systems are finally starting to open their eyes up.
@@shirleyarmani7714exactly
On the other hand, there are family members who ignore abuse. (The Home School Legal Defense Association protected many of us when we were home schooling. Just an anonymous tip, and your kids are seized without any due process: speedy hearing with impartial jury. There is some sort of human trafficking going on in reprobate courts. In Florida well-to-do elderly are taken and put under guardianship so the courts, guardians, and lawyers can munch on their wealth.)
mourningwarbler, abuse should never be ignored. We have made progress in this area and much more needs to be done.
I’m so scared. We are going start mediation next week and I’m hoping and praying for my stbx to come to this with an open mind, willing to compromise, realize that me and him are the parents (not the grandparents), and most importantly that it’s not about winning it’s about the kids (not what is convenient with him).
He is trying to get full custody, majority parenting time, his mom as the babysitter/teacher because he doesn’t want them to go to school.
And even if it hurts I want to do 50/50 with him because it’s what’s right for our girls.
Denise Huerta, I hope things go well for you. You are the mother your children need.
Yes I do 50/50 0 I have my son Friday Saturday Monday morning to but dad stops me as he lied used my past against me..an£ he got temporary primary Carrer
,.
I understand what you're going through.❤
Yes, I needed to see this 💗Thank you!
You are welcome.
What if you have spent the last 8 years watching your child be endangered and your self being controlled with allegations stolen from cheated on and lied to? I struggle to treat my co parent with any respect after the treatment I have received from her and her parents.
mr machinist, I get what you are saying. You are also never wrong about how you feel, you are responsible for your behavior. It is natural to feel hurt when someone has lied and hurt our most precious relationships.
It happens to Moms too. Some people really know how to work attorneys like this who aren’t trained to work with those who undergo significant trauma and abuse but have remained the pro facia parent. But the court sure as heck better perform their due diligence and have all the necessary evidence in hand before making any assumptions.
In my case all talk no evidence
The paradigm has shifted way to much for this fantasy of both parents working with each other when some one benefits from the one gets less and other gets more this just keeps you paying into this
It is difficult for people who can't get along to stay married to be able to work together for the kids. It would be best if they could.
Thank you my son has 2 baby moms that treat him this way one constantly wants to arrest him for kidnapping on his weekends when he takes his son around family member she don’t like... well the son told his father all what mother was doing and his mother has mental abuse him he is 12 and wants to go live with his dad and well I have had to fill child abuse charges on her cause my grandson texted me and begged me to please make mom stop hit and punching me and calling me names...Mammoo make her stop!!! My heart drop I had to send the police for a welfare check!!! My son can’t afford a lawyer DCH finally got involved and we are working on trying to get him
Marie Smith, I wish you luck. I hope things work out for you.
I’m currently going through a custody battle and due to the fact I have a criminal case pending to an alleged battery on an officer and my daughters dad, although I have no recollection. And him not knowing where I was but appeared there with a camera recording already. I honestly think someone roofied me & it wouldn’t surprise me if my daughters dad got someone to do his dirty deed. Now, he’s blackmailing me saying if I file paperwork I will lose all custody, in which I’m terrified. My daughter has always been with me since born, i breastfed for 3 years, and now she’s 5 and because I missed a court she was taken away from me over night and she is autistic. He doesn’t allow me to talk to her for weeks
At a time. And now I only see her twice a month. I have filed numerous police
Reports online of him violating our court order, I have a letter from his older sister stating My daughters best interest is with me. He’s had our autistic daughter hold a gun and
So much more…I need help and I feel like mo one is hearing my cries for help!
I am so sorry. Do you have an attorney? They would help you to navigate the system.
Thank you so much for making these videos!!!
They are very helpful for those of us who are new to this horrible situation.
You are welcome, merncat75. It's an honor to be on your team. Thank you for watching.
How to people hate this video?? This is straight facts when cooming into court!
Who knows? People have their choice to like or dislike. I want those who like to get the information.
I fought and won full custody of my son! She was stripped of all rights but to advise me of his best interest! Couldn’t come within 500 ft of us unless it’s supervised visits at my discretion and in a public place!
John Hamilton, I wish the best for you and your son.
Wow how did u do it as my violent ex won't let me see my son for 7 months..and he's on drugs .
@@annaclusker2261 I had documentation and a great lawyer! I dug in deep and took all the mental abuse my ex gave out! My circumstances was on my side from the get go! She abused her oldest son and was caught by a tenant and was reported to cps and after their investigation they declared her unfit but I didn’t know that at the time! I had school records of sons absentees and they were overly excessive (28 days or more). She scheduled an mhmr (mental health evaluation) for her oldest and she was a no show and got documentation on it! She just flat out told me of her and her boyfriends sex life in detail! I caught her in lies and also she never appeared in hearings nor did what the judge ordered us to do! I went very deep into that rabbit hole to ensure I got custody of my son and still paying the price of the mental and emotional abuse I endured and this all happened in 2009! I would do it all over again for my son cause he has grown into an awesome man and is going to have a great career ahead of him and we both know that he wouldn’t have had that with her! Wish you luck
@@LiveOnPurposeTV thank you! We are happy and doing great! He’s about to turn 20 and still ticklish and I’m still enjoying being his father! Lol
@@annaclusker2261 if he is not allowing visitation I would follow what the decree says and document several times he has failed to appear with your son and then seek help with legal counsel and action!
I have a detention report of verbal and physical child abuse against the mother of my kids who were took from her custody,, I want to know why if there is enough evidence to take our kids from her, WHY WAS SHE NOT CRIMINALLY CHARGED 🤔
Queen Love, I don't know, I wish you the best.
Well, sometimes the father is the BETTER parent. My bf is alienated from his children because his ex wife is angry that he didn't want to work out things with her. She would hit him etc. Days before the actual incident his oldest child was saying he was going to miss his side of the family and it's been almost 2 years he hasn't seen them and she talks ill of him on Facebook
Agreed. Children should have access to both parents.
I hate that I have tried my hardest to get along with the father of my child and his wife, I have been vulnerable, apologized when I was in the wrong, and not given into their drama as much as I could with nothing in return… no child support, nothing for our child, and no apology(which is the least of my worries)… we haven’t been to court yet because he said he was going to settle and sign the order but he hasn’t… but even though he hasn’t signed the order I still give him visitation…. I have been dumb and went like a month without letting him see her, but again, no order hasn’t been signed…. He has been getting visitation now and I’m trying to do everything I’m supposed to do even though he hasn’t given me any support wish me luck on doing the right thing… yes I still mess up and feed into the drama and get annoyed at them because of all the stuff they say, but I’m trying to work it all out and I think it will get better after the court date next month.
I am glad that you have tried. I do wish you the best with your court date. Hopefully that will wake them up.
This is Exactly what happened with our current custody battle. Evaluator sided with my husband and I over his two children. Mom is unwilling to admit any fault, recorded her children, all she talked about is what happened 10 years ago. We were very careful, respectful and henremained humble through this process and we are pleased it served him. I am thankful for your videos. Wish us luck we are nearing then end of year battle hopefully. Thank you again from Idaho
Crystal M, good luck to you!
What if a mother has a second child from another Father and tells that child negative things about the child’s siblings Father? Dealing with custody battle, I was visiting the mom to see my child, and whenever she would leave the room, her 10 year old son would come out his room, stand there, to “supervise” me and return to his room when his mother came back. Is that not considered negative?
So grateful 🙏 for both of you. Thank you for putting in the time to I form us, as we navigate this painful valley.
Our pleasure! Jeannette Miller, honored to be on your team.
Sometimes a person might not "feel" it. But I can say after several decades of marriage to the same person, that it has a lot to do with action. Do you love your spouse? Then ACT like you do. Sometimes it must be really hard if there is abuse of family members or drugs or crazy spending, etc., but apart from that and maybe sometimes even then, many marriages could be restored and better than ever. ACT like you love the person you promised to love "till death do us part." Maybe it's because my parents & grandparents showed how it was done. I saw my grandma take grandpa out of the smoke shop by the ear; he was bent over saying, "Ouch, ouch, ouch!" Today in such a situation it would have been different, different language too. (Baron Montesquieu speaks of nations being destroyed by reprobation/demoralization/lack of virtue. 1962 & 1973 were huge steps in that direction for the USA.) What was the ear pulling about? Grandma was afraid Grandpa was going to gamble away the family farm. After that, he continued to visit the back of the smoke shop to play cards. Whether he was gambling big before or not, I do not know; but after that, it was just about cards. He would bring his winnings home in candy bars.
Thank you for sharing. You are spot on, use love as a verb and the "feeling" will follow.
If you find yourself being consoled by your child or ostracized because of the other parents actions or hatred. How should the consoled or ostracized parent approach that with their child?
Seeking Justice, if I understand what you are asking, look at this situation as an opportunity for your child to use empathy and kindness, don't bring them any further into the situation or have them feel responsible in any way for what is happening. You can let your child know how you are sad and tell her hugs make you feel better. For a small child, this is enough.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV great advice, thank you.
I’ve tried time after time after time to repeatedly try and get my daughters mom to try and be close to my daughter she gave her to me a little over 6 months ago but she ultimately doesn’t want anything to do with my little girl so I pretty much give up on that we have court in about a month so fingers crossed I’ll get custody of her
Edwin, I wish you and your daughter well.
I’m dealing with a narcissist and an abuser please I need help I wanna get child support and get full custody of my child my daughter dad can’t even cook for himself let alone feed my child he would rather spend money on beer than buy food for my kid and it’s his kid too he doesn’t deserve her at all I tried my hardest to keep him happy but he’s a narcissist and emotionally abusive I need help what can I do ?
I don't know your situation, it would be best to work with someone who is familiar with your court system.
So I don't know if anybody will read this, but in the divorce my ex-wife claimed 100% physical custody of my kids, and then my middle son told me, that Mom will spend two or three nights at a time, away from home. Should I see about getting the court to intervene? As a follow-up, a private investigator confirmed that she would spend two or three days away from home at a time.
Get the evidence and calmly approach the court if that is what you want to do.
What happens when the other still pursues a relationship with you when you don't want them back because they cheated.. They come by without calling, etc.. No boundaries..I get worried about stalking and them not having anything to do. When does the court see this for what it is and could become? And that they talk bad about your family, too.
Sherri Kins, if you are afraid you should get a restraining order so you have protection and it is documented. See an attorney for advice on this matter. Your safety is paramount.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV thank you..I did one. He was served, already violated it.
This where I am. Custody battle in progress. I am tasked with developing a phased step up parenting plan. Meanwhile, the father is 100% on the smear campaign...
I need help getting custody of my child
I hope you find it, we don't do child custody cases any longer.
In my case my ex has put the kids in the middle he's been telling the children to keep secrets against me and continues to say negative comments I have not said anything about their father in front of them I rose above what has gone on he has been dishonest in court. I don't claim to be perfect I went through parenting classes and communication workshop with the court he hasn't been honest through the entire process unfortunately my ex has used them as pawns. I don't say anything to the children he's doing it unfortunately on purpose I haven't said anything unfortunately in my case there's conjugal abuse It's very difficult the court here doesn't look at it as a pattern of abuse I find it very difficult I'm being the better parent I'm legally not allowed to say anything in front of the kids I can't even say when they look unbathed and nails dirty and uncut I'm not even allowed at all I've been keeping a journal for behavior I've noticed, but say nothing to them of what I observe. My ex hasn't paid any child support hasn't brought them to doc appointments or dentists me and my parents it has fallen on our plates as extra responsibilities and expenses unfortunately It's documented in a binder for court I find the system here is very difficult he's stolen from me and has gotten the kids to steal and hasn't been honest I can't even ask the kids about the items I will not put my kids in the middle I love my kids with all my heart and will fight for them.
Robyn Edward, I appreciate you watching, however there is not much we can help you with in terms of legal advice. We have several videos on our Child Custody playlist - th-cam.com/play/PLq2mRDkHEBPBhTE4dbqLMBrRk8Uop0jgd.html, and I hope you can find some value there. Being a single parent is so hard; we also have a Positive Parenting playlist to help you out with that: th-cam.com/play/PLq2mRDkHEBPCclxt6agg3wrLBRkL7CCwU.html. You may particularly like
"How To Be A Single Parent After Divorce" - th-cam.com/video/G4hjN5B1-AE/w-d-xo.html
and "How To Make Ends Meet As A Single Parent" - th-cam.com/video/btNvSj7fOxQ/w-d-xo.html
Best wishes.
Women tend to exaggerate
@@t.c.2402 I told the truth in my case my ex didn't tell any truth he's the man It's been very difficult he said I left for 3 months and willing left him the lease in reality he changed the locks and booted me out I had to go buy shampoo and other items and stay in a hotel and buy clothes for court I have a bank statement to prove other things about what happened at the time. It was very difficult at the time we were one week custody and I'd leave when it wasn't my week he didn't care if I was homeless and lock the door handle to the handle I didn't have keys for preventing me from entering when we were both on the lease and yeah it wasn't good long story short he ended up stalking me and harassing me and ended up threatening me in the end I was able to get a restraining order and he's continuing to put the children in the middle on a brighter note I was able to get a lease in my name. I have to prove that the kids are in the middle on his side he wasn't honest to the social worker from the court and they believed him the problem with the system they aren't trained to deal with narrascist he's basically a Trump bullying and intimidation tactics I got stronger and didn't let him bring me down
@@t.c.2402 your probably right
I have a child that has just turned 8yrs old. I have him on Fridays after i finish work until Sunday then he goes home to his mother. A few weeks ago my son told me his mum sold little white bags out of her car. I took my son off her for a few weeks and then I tried to work things out because she had denied any knowledge. And now my son is back with his mother he is sleeping at her house, stays at her friend's and new boyfriends house. My son told me that he had stayed in his mums friend's bed with him and his mother but my sons mother stayed in the next room in the house.. my sons school phone me up whilst I'm working nearly everyday asking why my son is not in school. My son does not eat much or wash at home because his mother does not prompt him to. What should I do? Should I take his away from her and make her go to court? I am stressed everyday worrying where my son is and I have spoke to the social services, they just keep saying they think I should do what I think is right for my son they can't tell me what they think I should do. It would be really helpful for some good advice I don't really have anyone that can talk and help me out.. the social services have been on my sons mums back for a few years now and I have no bad records at all. Help me out please
I know you don't want to hear this, Ray, but you are the one that has to make the decision. What is holding you back if you are stressed or concerned? Figure out what that is and deal with it first so that you can decide and move on. You may need some help and can schedule a call with one of our coaches to help you, www.drpauljenkins.com/breakthroughcall.
I really appreciate all the great content! Thank you guys!
Glad you enjoy it! Luke O., honored to be on your team.
Idk, my mom flagrantly violated all these. It was documented by 2 court appointed psychologists and the GAL. All my dad got was a court order for 2 days a week visitation. My experience has been women can literally kidnap their kids and flee the state in defiance of court orders, and still retain primary custody. But my experience is admittedly an anecdote
It is shared by many, but some do not get away with it.
I love Sid! So much great information complete with real-life stories.
Sid is great, isn't he? Thank you for the positive feedback, Mona Jones.
I have trial on a couple months, haven t been allowed to see my daughter in nearly 1 1/2 years. 5 years old. I have done no wrong and me and my daughter had a great relationship.
I’m subbing because I need all the help I can get. Can’t afford a lawyer
Living Legend, I hope you are able to see your daughter. Thank you for watching.
You know in some states parental Alienation is illegal
Thank u guys so much for taking ur time to do this I have a daughter I lost years back turned my life around and got my children back its been 4 yrs so my oldest lives with her dad she calls her step mom mom and called me allison for a while she still calls her step mom mom im trying super hard to be supportive for my daughter but I will admit sometimes its super hard to not let my feelings get in the way but I dont know what to do she completely ignores me when we are all together. Itd total heart crushing can u please help with some advice
We are honored to be on your team. It may take some time, be open and loving, always. She is testing to see if you are going to be there for her.
we are dealing with flying monkets. my partner has supervised phone calls and then supervisor is his daughter's baby sitter. 15 phone calls were missed and she has assisted the girl in leaving voice-mail wiht false and already recanted abuse accusations. we finally got a call on fathers day and the daughter told us that mom didn't want her to talk to dad. supervisor won't respond to messages asking to confirm this.
Wow! There is a lot to track here. Keep a record and I hope it works out for you.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV thanks for responding. these videos are invaluable
I have domestic violence being victim 4 years ago after 2 years fighting in the court the father win after that I lose my daughter get kill by his father none believe if my ex is violence thanks for the justice of getting making wrong choice
MOnica Rante, I am sorry to hear what happened. We are here for you.
I feel your pain. Constitutional law is dead.
I have a case where my stepson keeps telling us he gets hit by his stepdad and whenever my husband brings it up, mom says dad is making up things because he is jealous of her new relationship. We’re currently dealing with cps because my stepson came with shoe imprints on his bottom and mom keeps saying her son is lying and that dad is putting things in his head. Her husband did admit to hitting him right in front of her but every time her son, 4, asks why do you let him hit me? Mom keeps calling him a liar. My stepson even told me once he knows his mom doesn’t like his dad but he does. So I’m sure there’s some parental alienation going on there. Any advice for us? We’ll be going to court as mom wants to modify a court order on his visitation being supervised because cps is investigating her husband and her for child abuse.
DuJoJo Eslie, it sounds like you are handling the situation. Good luck with your court date.
Update??
My husbands ex wife did everything she could to try to make him a bad guy. She lost custody and visitation.
Tammy Guess Beckham, Some men do win custody. Thanks.
Nice I don’t have kids but good to see it does happen
Why did she lose custody? If I may ask?
Im stepmom
wish the internet, social media, etc, was around or more vocal about this issue during my situation😔🙏🏼
I wish you the best.
Justice! That's how! Not all women are made out to be good mothers, same goes for fathers!
Google User, at the channel we seek to empower parents who want to learn how to be better.
I got pregnant with my child’s biological father after knowing him for 5 weeks. He wasn’t involved with me much and I was trying to make him be involved. I moved in with him and his parents about 2 weeks before she was born. I found out he was on tinder. He was with me at hospital and name on birth certificate. I didn’t get along with his family and he barely helped me. I left him right after she had turned 1. I moved back in with my parents. He told me I had to co parent with him because children need a father. He asked me to co parent with him. He was verbally abusive to me when I was with him. He would always yell at me in front of my daughter. I left because of him being on tinder and because of all the yelling. He said I would have her 4 days and he would have her 3 days. It kind of worked up until he started seeing his ex. He then got engaged to his ex really fast. Then he moved in with her. After that happened he started changing the co parent plan. Every time I saw him he would say something negative to me. She started saying all these diff reasons how she was sick. At first it was believable. Then she started to say she didn’t want my daughter at her house if she had a cold or anything. Although if she got sick there she was sent back to me sick no exceptions. So sometimes my daughter would be with me 3 weeks in a row. Sometimes his mom would watch Lily too. But his fiancé continues to say she is sick. She said she had pink eye in her stomach. Said she was immune compromised. Said she had leukemia.said she had arthritis. Said she had cyhrosis of the liver. He told me I wasn’t aloud to date anyone else. I have to keep my relationship with my bf completely secret or else get yelled at by him and her. The last time I saw them, his fiancé was screaming at me saying I was trying to kill her because she woke up on a Saturday throwing up. They took my daughter to the er. She had a virus. Now they are saying they are taking me to court and going to take my daughter from me, but then also said they can’t see her for 6 weeks. I went on his fiances social media and she isn’t sick in any of her videos. She had a video of her making my daughter wrestle her son. Has a lot of videos about smoking weed. She had a video she went to the hospital for punching a wall, saying she has anger issues. My daughter told me her dad yells at her and she’s scared of him, and that he hits her. She is 4 so I don’t know what’s true or not. I was never out to get him. They seem to be out to get me. What do you do? I have a low income and when they said we are taking u to court and taking ur daughter away… I had suggested going to a mediator. But what I meant was like a family therapist. They just kept yelling at me and wouldn’t listen to Me. I have no idea what I’m supposed to do. My gynecologist had told me once, don’t worry about what he does, worry about your daughter. I tried to involve him with my child. What do you do? His fiancé forces my daughter to call her mama and she seems severely mentally ill and delusional. I’m not someone who is out to get people. I dotn have thousands of dollars to go to court. Does anyone have suggestions ?
You are giving them control where they don't have it. You will probably have to go to court to put a parenting plan into place and you don't need a lawyer for it, though it would be better to be represented. Keep a file with everything in it so you can present it to the court.
Thanks again fir all your good advise guys xxx
grey wold, you are welcome.
Me and my GF just moved from CA to NC in search of a better much more affordable lifestyle. We have a 7 month baby boy and want nothing but the best for him. In CA we where living with her moms now in NC we're living with my parents. She decided that it'll be better for us to move to NC sonner than what we had planned because she couldn't put up with her mom and dad anymore there was always problems amongst them and it was affecting our relationship. So we made the move i resigned my job made some calls and bought our tickets to NC. She would always say that moving in with my parents would better our relationship and we wouldn't be putting up with her families drama in CA and it wouldn't be toxic. Now that we're here in NC we found jobs and my parents love and care for my son and my GF . my mom always going above and beyond for us , cooking and cleaning for us and caring for my son which is something I've never felt from her family side and im happy here in NC. Long story short I've started to notice a change in her like she's always on her phone or sometimes it looks like she's mad and won't talk to anybody which makes it awkward because my family is full of joy and happiness. I brought it up to her attention and all hell broke loose started saying that im wrong for saying such things and that she's been doing everything for my son. So we stepped out the house because I didn't want my parents to hear us arguing so i had my mom look after my son and she told me exactly how shes been feeling lately, and how she doesnt feel the same for me anymore. Hearing her say that really hurt me so much being together for 3 years being the best father with my son and helping her throughout her pregnancy when her mother was really never there. She told me that my mom does so much for me like cook, clean and is very loving with my son and that she regrets moving so soon because her family back in CA didn't spend enough time with my son. She sees how happy my son is ever since we arrived at my parents and how caring they are with him and I think she gets jealous because her parents where never like that with my son and all of a sudden she wants to return back to CA back to the same family drama that she had before we moved to NC. We just have a month since we moved and I dont see her happy and im afraid that one day she'll decide to leave with my child back to CA and to try something sneaky behind my back. I honestly don't see our relationship lasting that long, and what can I do now before something like this can happen? Help plz 🙏
IvanDeeTerrible, please get some help with communicating for the two of you. If you do part ways, you need to be able to communicate so that both of you have a place in your child's life.
My ex has alienated my children from me and used the courts to take away my visitation. It is heartbreaking. I want a good relationship with my children AND my ex husband. I left him because we had a toxic relationship. He believes that because I’m an ex wife, I should be an ex mother. I haven’t seen my boys for a year and my daughter for 4 months. I have done all in my power including $30,000 in legal representation to try and get some visitation and am now waiting on reconciliation counseling. My ex has sabotaged it up until now.
Nikki Bentley Is My Angel My children are 24, 19 and 14. I moved next door so they could go back and forth. It is very hurtful to have people say things about circumstances they know nothing about. The trauma is bad enough that to be re traumatized again trying to explain is a huge trigger. When someone asks, how can children turn against a loving parent? Or what have you done that your children want nothing to do with you? Is heartbreaking. I love my children with all my heart and had a beautiful relationship with them up until I left my abusive spouse. He then used them as pawns.
@@suddenlyhope Not everyone believes as this other viewer does. I am very sorry to hear about your situation. I can't imagine the pain your heart must be going through. I sincerely hope that you can reconcile soon and be in your children's lives again. Despite evidence, the world isn't all bad. I love this channel, & hope you feel supported by Dr. Paul & his team, as so many of us do. 💚
Tecumseh A. Thank you for your kind words. Love and Kindness goes a long way in this world. I am grateful that God has got me this far. And I know he will be with me and show me how to reconcile and renew relationships with my children. I am praying for them daily.
@@suddenlyhope I love your attitude & faith. 🙂 Please don't take this as being preachy... think of it as a friendly reminder, as I'm sure you've heard this before. Remember: God's timing is not our timing. I prayed for 12 years to have children with my husband. Finally He gave them to me, & I spent the next 8 years praying for help to be a good parent! 😆 Then He directed me to Live On Purpose TV. It's so hard to be patient when we want good things, but the Lord's timing will serve us best in the end. Merry Christmas to you. 🎄
SuddenlyHope, it sounds like you love your children very much and are trying to have a positive relationship with them. That is great. Keep that up, even tough it's hard. I have a whole Child Custody playlist; if you want to see if there is anything more helpful, please check it out: th-cam.com/play/PLq2mRDkHEBPBhTE4dbqLMBrRk8Uop0jgd.html Thank you for watching, and best wishes.
Mine is so much diffrent my children are with md as a dad on and exparte because moms boyfriend is under investigation of sexualy assault of my 2 and 4 year old girls she never left him tryed to help financially or emotionally still with man under investigation kids are with me the father till november 20 th for final hearing
I hope you prevail and the kids are safe.
"It would be best if they could co-parent or parallel parent" Yeah no duh. But if the two people were capable of cooperating, they would still be together.
Stricken Baseball Series, not always. I have seen people who can't get along being married, but are able to successfully co parent. They have to be mature and focused.
Lots of people successfully co-pparent. I did with my ex-husband.
No that's totally different. We're not married anymore, so he may treat me like crap and I stay friendly and obedient, as long as I can see my kids. When we were married I would get mad. Now I say yes sir. What do I care? Over the years he started to treat me quite normal.
I need help with a When vindictive mother makes false claims and statements leaves them on talking parents and I’m stuck with: 1) Not to respond to it and dose it look like I accepted her claim? 2) Response in the attempt to professionally defuse the conflicting conversation of false statements in somewhat defend myself?
rey novelo, calmly and rationally present your side and don't look for anyone to validate you.
Wait! They "rehabilitate" mom and throw dad under the bus?!
matt071482, don't read too much into one conversation. There is a lot behind the story.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV thanks for replying! OK. I'll try not to. Thanks for the videos. I'm trying to learn
My daughters mother took her to buy drugs. And she gets wonderful treatment. And me. I am put under the bus.
Well yeah. The world is unfair and the court has bias. Toward mom
No the other parent dont want to participate or play the game
This was good info but I feel like I have special surcomstance in obeying the court order, let me explain. I take my daughter out for the exchange as the court order requires it to be at curbside of the home. Her father parks down the road at someone else’s residence and will not park at mine, then when my daughter fights me about going and I keep saying why and you say you have fun when your there and it’s your dads time she just cries. I ask for his assistance and he threatens to file contempt and has, we are going to court for it, but then says if she doesn’t get into his car with 15 min he’ll leave and file contempt. Now he is using that against me trying to get full custody, they have combined the contempt and the custody trial. I don’t understand, I did everything I could to get her to go aside from dragging her and throwing her in his car, I did record it. He tries to create situations and say I’m not following the court order. Just something for you guys to think about I guess. Not sure what that means but I even ground my daughter when she does this because he is not listening and that still doesn’t help. Side note, my daughter has also been diagnosed by a court appointed evaluator to have separation anxiety.
Natures 1st Green, we can only do our best. I would explain what is happening in a very calm manner and I bet the judge will listen.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV Thank you, and I plan on it. I guess I was rambling a bit bc it makes me feel like I’m doing something wrong at the same time knowing I’m not, I’m honestly trying to do my best to work with the other parent so it’s just stressful and I know if it is on me I can only imagine the kiddos!
Thank you for the information. So helpful. Being humble and improving myself. Such good advice
You're so welcome! Honored to be on your team, I S.
What about when there's DV involved and the other parent is actually a concern? I have a protection order against dad, but I still want whatever is best for baby, so I play his game and try to co-parent. Whatever happened between he and I isn't my child's fault, but he isn't a safe person for me. He's also in another state where the PO isn't able to be enforced...
India, it sounds like you are doing what is best for your child. I am glad you are able to separate the two.
What should I do I really need help
sadrina mota, I do appreciate you watching, but there is little I can do. You would be best off finding an attorney to help you with this situation. We do have a free coaching call available, if you would like to try that. It won't help you with your case, but possibly the way you are dealing with it internally, psychologically. You could try to schedule a call with my guest in the video, Sid Unrau who is an attorney and a coach. Here's the link: DrPaulJenkins.com/breakthroughcall
i have an established court order and it is 50/50 with my daughters mom since 2015 . for years she has not complied and i know i should have took legal action sooner . but she moved out of riverside county to san diego county without a 45 day notice which is required in our orders.. she wants to switch her schools also and i do not agree . we both agreed on where she would go to school back in 2018.. i have now filed for modification of child custody and visitation and put in my stipulation that i would want to have our daughter majority of the time and put in it as well each violation of non compliance in our agreement and provided proof through text messages. i hope this works . i have majority custody not through court for a month now which is m-f and mother has her on the weekends only ..
562 Made, I am glad you are there for your daughter.
You guys are awesome, I wish I could find a professional in my area like you gentlemen.
Thanks 👍
What do you do when the other parent is an abuser and an alcoholic? My wife and I have been together for 6 years and have I have a strong relationship with her 2 daughters. There mom lost custodial to their dad who berated, beat, and stalked her while they were together and afterwards. She had no lawyer and he had a lawyer. The house they bought together went to him cause he only put it in his name. He is just a trash person. He constantly tried to drage the kids into every little disagreement. He has called the police because they girls didnt want to speak to him during our custody. The kids gave even asked me if I could be their dad instead which breaks my heart. We have tried co parenting with him it is impossible. We invite him to their birthday parties and I even had to kick him out omce because he slapped the oldest daughter. I really could use some advice. No idea how we could get custody back so the girls dont have to keep suffering in that toxic alcoholic environment.
Work with an attorney and have the girls see a counselor for additional documentation if possible. Sometimes it can be done through school.
It’s funny how the court naturally chooses the mother as the base parent and paints the father as an evil being
DEATH CHARGE, there is cases where the father gets custody.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV about 10% 9f the cases. Not very equal.
I have the opposite situation and I'm the more stable parent
My girl wants to move out of town with her mom because shes going to be lonely and also takes my kids away from me. We dont have problems at all but what am not agree on is that my girl choose her mom 1st instead of me. I mean we have a family we supposed to stay together and not living with their parents but she dont want to leave her mom...
What you guys think i need a suggestion???
@@SACRAMENTO_916 if she quick to leave without worry about u leave her she’s not the one for you
3 years now my ex says shes moving to texas from Kansas and my 10 yr old daughter says she doesn't want to go to texas and say with me. 3 times my ex moved and I had my daughter 3 times she moved back later in the year and took kid back. I still pay support to mom and I've never got to claim kid on taxes. 2020 was a hard year financially I recieved no child credit or stimulus or claimed kid. Mom did. I was not behind until end of 2020 on support. Now they are taking my return for arrears and a bill from the mom when we were married 10 yrs ago and a tag on car violation from 2013. I've had tags every year since thin and renewed license never was informed of violation. Now all tax return is gone to ex and state. I've recently seen where irs and state only abide by state when it pertains to the mom benefiting. I drive every weekend or every other weekend and its 8 hrs of driving shes never made the drive except 1 time since divorce. I'm at my end. I have 1 other kid over 20 with another woman and I never was allowed to claim kid even with court order custodial has to fill out a form allowing me to claim . Court has no power I guess and she left for 8 years. Judge said he couldn't do anything. And whe my ex takes daughter back it's a few months and a phone number change and talking to her friends before contact is established and I get to see my kid again. I've seen how worse the rules have gotten I've tried for over 20 years to be a dad. It does get frustrating.
I can see how this is frustrating. I am sorry you are going through this. I hope your daughter can stay with you.
Thank you for this video
Chefiatou Falana, you are welcome.
We do not have a current custody order and me and my ex live in 2 different counties. The kids were going to school in my county for the past 10 years. 6 years in this current county. He has now kept them in cyber and I haven’t seen them in person for 64 days. I’m guessing I will definitely get them back but this is taking way too long. Mother’s Day is in a few days and he said he needs to ask his lawyer if the girls should see me. It’s sick. I’m waiting on a court hearing for an Expedited Answer and Counter Claim that I put in. It’s been 3 weeks since that.
Amber Bezzina, I am so sorry. I am glad you are documenting this, it will work against him in the end.
It’s ok for dads to alienate kids from mom , not, it works both ways!
I wish there were no alienation, ann kogut. It would be wonderful if both parents loved their children, and the children loved both parents, and the parents were respectful. Even after divorce, there can be love. Thanks for watching.
Sid is spot on.
Thanks, mr machinist.
The same reason a dad can lose custody of his child. Unfit parent.
Gordon Grandz, yes, thanks for watching.
But what if the unfit mother gets custody
I live in nh my mom accused me of things that never happened all she has is hearsay but i have evidence she is lying? How common would a judge decide to not give my daughter back?
Pj Gage, I have no idea of the specifics of your case. Please talk to a licensed attorney.