I stopped saying "I don't have time". I now say "I don't make time for it". Because that's the truth. I could do that if I wanted but I choose to do other things (or nothing). This way I take responsibility for it instead of blaming it on something else. Then I make time if I really want to do that thing. Just wanted to share this because it was something I realised late and I wish I had done it sooner in my life.
This was one of the upsides about working in an office, the commute home allowed for time to decompress afterwards. Finding it when working from home is a lot more tricky. I wind up staying up a lot later than I should.
If you can manage it I recommend trying a “virtual commute”. It’s a lot shorter than when I used to drive in, but I’ll shut down my work, and go listen to a podcast or music for 10 or 15 minutes and it really helps.
SO true! Something i've implemented recently is walking to work and back home - *_especially_* when i feel stress is increasing and i sense a lack of time creeping into my days. takes me 25mins a trip instead of 7mins on my bicycle, but i feel more at ease, energized and focussed afterwards. 🌱⚡
It depends what kind of commute it is... Taking public transportation can be very stressful. Or sitting in traffic knowing you already could be home with your kids is also stressful...
I've found the opposite. Sitting in traffic, and having no control over my time, was hugely stressful, especially knowing I'd have to go through the whole process of getting in the door, getting dressed, putting bags away etc. Nowadays, there's finally time to decompress. Everything is finally efficient as it should always have been in the first place 😌
@@huckleberry3522you shouldn’t even be awake for more than 16 hours and considering multiple hours of your time are probably going to work/school that’s very troubling
I realise Iv been doing this subconsciously by chosing to go on long walks for work rather than taking the bus, it just feels great to walk and reflect about your life
For those who are interested, I'd highly recommend assembling models and painting them. Keeps your hands occupied with the task that requires only patience, while keeping your mind free to roam.
@user-go1sl6rd7u It's such an odd comment to write down when I've never mentioned anything related to GW, Warhammer, or anything. If you don't know anything about Revell and their models of tanks, trains, or ships. Not like they are the only ones. From checking my collection, there is also Zvezda (better to avoid them in beginning, hassle to glue), Italeri, and Tamiya. Heck, I even paint my own stuff that I 3D print (not recommend for the starters also!), lots of interesting stuff you can design on your own, like buildings, landmarks or with the help from Blender, rip models from games and so on. The fact that you mentioned them when my post never did, tells me that you only invested in their miniatures, and never heard of others and developed old or new grievances due to their policies and actions (which are immoral, one must admit). Or you are throwing hate for the sake of hate. Either way, expanding your horizons will help you.
Phones use is so insanely weird because you don’t even notice how much time is passing. I used to feel like the days were way too short, first time I cut out phone usage, I was like. “I have too much time. Now what.”
It's kind of dishonest though. Like I'm literally using Google voice to dictate while I burn cardboard in the burning barrels and tree branches. So like Even if I spend 3 hours on my phone it's like 3 hours I was spending doing other tasks anyway. So literally I'm like being told to cut out 10 minutes here and there to free up an entire chunk of time which I wouldn't really necessarily have too decompress. I also don't have any problem sleeping whatsoever. Unless I'm like really excited and if I'm really excited not doing the thing I'm really exciting about is going to cause anxiety.
@@makaisenkiEvery one of those minutes you spent on your phone while doing some other task is a minute you could’ve spent decompressing instead. He’s not wrong.
@@babybirdhome I can't decompress while I'm doing yard work. Decompression is afterwards and a lot of my decompression is listening to stuff on my phone. If I spend 8 hours sleeping, 5 hours on my phone, 3 hours doing chores, 9 hours at work, 3 hours relaxing with my wife, and an hour on meals... That's 29 hours what gives? Oh cause most of my phone time I'm doing something else like driving, or running errands with my wife cause she loves to drive.
Doesn't even have to be all at once either. Just take space in quiet moments to mull over things. While you're waiting for your food in the microwave, or walking between buildings at your college, or when you have downtime at work, or even just in between games of league when you're getting a snack. You don't have to fill every moment of your life with entertainment. Take those moments and think about stuff, think about how your relationship is going and how you feel about it. Think about your friends or family and how you feel about them. Think about how you've been doing lately. Just take some time to think stuff over even if it's not strictly an emotional thought. It helps so so much
I don't usually write on youtube videos, but I have to say thank you! After very hard years, I started to really change things and one of the things that helped me the most in my worst days were your videos! I never thought it was possible to get completely out of that darkness I was living in! And now I am out!
Dr. K's comment just made me realise how good it is for my mental health to not own a personal smartphone. Commuting and working out gives me multiple hours per day where my mind can just wander.
That is very scary, I don't trust my brain not to be constantly stimulated, I listen to a book or TH-cam all say everyday from when I wake to to i fall a sleep, I have had many depressive episodes and I don't trust my brain to not jump down a rabbit hole of logic that brings me down. No mental activity besides studying then I listen I listen to music to keep my brain from self deleting
Playing music as you start this practice won’t hurt - as long as it doesn’t distract during mental exercise. Music can actually compliment activities such as meditation or journaling. I wouldn’t take “don’t use your phone” too literally. Yes don’t scroll on the phone when you’re meditating but using it for music can help.
That does mean that you are still engaging in the use of media and you’re not allowing your brain to fully disconnect/decompress during that time. You’re still feeding it information.
I'd also like to add a caviat that you should do this these things without listening to music (with words), a podcast, etc. Giving your mind time without other people's voices is important
This is excellent advice and god I wish it wasn't so addictive but yeah gotta get that meditating, journalling, or just sitting doing nothing/being with ur thoughts back. I will say tho I often have to walk/take transit so that's a good amount of time
Maybe it’s the ADHD, but I can’t be left completely to my own thoughts. I have to listen to something or be Very focused, otherwise my mind goes round in circles, I can’t think properly, and/or start to spiral 🌀
You are not alone bro. The fact that you felt the need to analyse yourself and give a reason in the reply section, says more about your ADHD. Its not your fault bro. Its the same for me too
no that is exactly what they are saying. you need to find alternative ways to deal with your throughts instead of just avoiding them by numbing or distracting. Its not that you can't by design, even though it may fairly be harder, its that you have developed a coping mechanism that isn't gonna help fixing it. Hope you find some ways to start feeling better. Good luck, I know its damn hard but worth trying
@@kani-licious yes, same. Your thoughts aren't bad or don't have to be. If they are overwhelming or stressful you can train to take breaks. Saying "this is what it is" doesn't mean "this is what it always has to be". Hope you find a way to make it better
This reminds me of what I think was a Zen Buddhist monk who said everyone should spend 30 minutes per day meditating, unless they don’t have time, in which case they should spend one hour a day meditating. That kind of wisdom hits so hard!
Most of the time on my phone each day is honestly my 3k plus music playlist on TH-cam. I probably spend actually 2-3 hours on the phone a day but my usage averages between 8.5-14 hours a day. I listen to music when driving, chilling, working, and doing nearly everything unless something I need to pay full attention to instead of listening to music. Although I try to listen to classical/baroque/romantic symphonies when it’s later at night or if I’m actually studying any topic that I’m trying to retain the information with less effort. I wasn’t the biggest fan of it most of my life with the exception of a few songs but in college music appreciation I ended up learning that it helps you actually focus. I tested it out when I was in 4 science major classes (4 hour classes each) and calculus I in the same semester which was 20 credit hours. If it wasn’t for the primarily baroque and classical music I would’ve had a much more significant time studying and retaining the information. When doing the test I would have headphones on listening to a mp3 player playlist that I let my teacher load on my device to ensure there wasn’t cheating because I put it on their computer. Was able to just listen to the music and all of the studying would come into vision in my minds castle with great ease even in highly intricate physiological processes.
Idk if anyone will see this but I would recommend if you go to the gym to not wear headphones in the gym, this can make workouts go faster and allow you to decompress. It can also lead to more conversations in the gym as well.
Another case of the algorithm reading my mind lol have been struggling with this for the last 2 months. Literally falling asleep at night watching shows, reading, etc but the moment I get in the bed, all my worries sprout out and I ended up sleeping 3 to 4 hours after trying. Sometimes even coming back up again tired of rolling around bed doing nothing and I even went to work few times with less than 2 hours sleep (once without having slept at all) The advice to spend one hour before bed even if it's really late and 'there's no time' to have a walk and think is spot on and will totally try cause at this point just getting 4 hours of sleep is a win to me. I go on ignoring my problems cause they're not urgent but then at night for some reason can't stop thinking and planning and worrying.
I recently watched your video on self control and it was great. Thank a lot. Still really love these short things. After hearing this I will try to journal before bed, like I've been called to. Thanks again ❤🙏
I suggest biking. Biking can be intense or can be leisure paced. You can space out riding a bike as long as the road condition is safe. You get a good amount of work while thinking about your emotions. That's a big time saver here
Cut 30 minutes to an hour out of your daily youtube, tiktok and instagram time, and spend that time listening to some of that music you used to love listening to. You can do other things that doesn't require significant focus or concentration while you do so - just allow yourself some time and space to think.
I started walking down to my small towns port every week and it's been very relaxing. Sadly it's also been really cold recently. And it takes 3 hours out of my week end so it's hard to find a spot to be completely unavailable.
I had emotional issues even back in the day before the internet, and I still isolated alone in my room, doing nothing but staring at the wall. And still do, 30 years later.
Driving. If I just want time to decompress, I hop in my car and drive around on the freeway for 20 minutes. This used to be at an office, but I’m wfh now and have to consciously drive to nowhere now.
I laugh so much internally when people tell me they dont have time. Because yea. I now make use of all youtube time for cardio or lifting. So when i look st my daily usage. I can proudly say 80% of that usage is pure working.
I have an hour to worry each day. Absolutely. And even if I’m on my phone, I can still worry. But the problem with that is that I’m constantly worrying about everything. My mom used to worry a lot, and it got modeled and projected into me. But I have to be a chain breaker. Even though she used to read the Bible she never took the time to heal. And healing can be hard in some places. I’m still trying to remind myself to save more money, but if I save $0, then it’s still $0. You can make something out of nothing. Anyway, I just try not to worry as much because I now know that I’m a child ofGod , the king, and I remind myself of Bible verses about not being anxious, and praying if I do feel anxious. So yeah, I absolutely could worry for an hour. Or even hours on end. But what good does it to me? Will I get all of those hours back? Or could I be using that time much more wisely.
In the past, people needed to create things irl to kill time. There were arcades, theme parks, food fairs, carnivals, events, sports, hobbies, clubs, books, etc. Going out was fun, and importantly, affordable. Nowadays, everything fun is (created) digital(ly), and too much time is killed. (See: the army of SWEs. Who knows how to run a carnival nowadays?)
I've been doing this daily for years and no one told me to. It just seemed like the natural thing to do. I usually do this before sleep for a few minutes, or while I'm cleaning the house since it helps pass the time faster and because I don't use that much brainpower to clean.
I have to journal like, a lot. Sometimes to even get up. I listen to subliminals while i do it but i don't think rain noises are the most stimulating lol. 😂
This really works with falling asleep. Some nights when I'm really wired, I have to force my brain to "turn off", and then my body just sinks into the mattress. About 10 minutes after that, I'm finally asleep.
Can I listen to music for this? Because I often listen to music, and completely stop paying attention to it, and like zone out. Like, my body will kinda dance to the music, but I’m 100% not listening to the music.
IDK when I listen to music I focus on the music 100 percent. So I think you should cut the music off if you want real space. This is easy to say but it's actually really tough for me personally. Glad you asked this though because I feel it's definitely easier to solve other people's problems than your own.
i think the point is to let your mind get bored and untangle its thoughts. Listening to music is still a form of distraction, similarly to how scrolling through social media is a form of distraction.
I have a bedtime routine that works. I've had it since I can remember, and I kept to it. Works like a charm. It's secret, though. Can't give away success for free.
Phone use is odd because of how many different things we use them for. Music, television, reading, recipee while cooking. That's not even considering talking, texting, video chat. There are some things I absolutely have to have my phone.
I go on bikerides on the trail. Spent 1100 dollars on a brand new bike. best money i ever spent. i dont even have to go very far but im getting better. I just go till i feel like turning around. Usually 3 or 4 miles out and then 4 miles back in thats a good amount of time all by yourself
It's not that i disagree with the suggestion. But, you can't equate cumulative daily phone consumption time with having access to an uninterrupted 1hr time slot before bed....to be alone. This won't work for a lot of people.
Bro I'm gonna need more suggestions than just "go for a walk" or "journal if you want to." Walking at 8pm isn't really an option for me and I don't think I can journal for an hour straight
My job requires use of phone so my usage would probably be skewed in what was for work and what was for entertainment purposes. But it is p insane we use it every waking moment of our lives
Unfourtunaly, i just checked my phone's recorded screen rime stats. Now im depressed. I thought you were supposed to HELP me Dr.K! 😭. Nah im kidding but if you have a Android device, rhe digitatal wellbeing function is somthing that either helps you or hurts you lol
![[Full] 4 ต่อ 4 Celebrity EP.920 | 3 พ.ย. 67 | one31](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/KwiW2M_kAg4/mqdefault.jpg)
For everyone asking, the full video was posted about a month ago and is titled ‘Why Having A Bedtime Routine Doesn’t Always Work’
gods work
THANK YOU
thank you😊😊
They should go back to putting the link. Surely that's not too much work for editors.
You're a gem, thank you. 🙏
I love the "Don't bullshit me" attitude from Dr. K on this one.
I stopped saying "I don't have time". I now say "I don't make time for it". Because that's the truth. I could do that if I wanted but I choose to do other things (or nothing). This way I take responsibility for it instead of blaming it on something else. Then I make time if I really want to do that thing.
Just wanted to share this because it was something I realised late and I wish I had done it sooner in my life.
That's great!
This was one of the upsides about working in an office, the commute home allowed for time to decompress afterwards. Finding it when working from home is a lot more tricky. I wind up staying up a lot later than I should.
And energy from work stays at home it’s hard to escape. I try to set time and room/space boundaries
If you can manage it I recommend trying a “virtual commute”. It’s a lot shorter than when I used to drive in, but I’ll shut down my work, and go listen to a podcast or music for 10 or 15 minutes and it really helps.
SO true!
Something i've implemented recently is walking to work and back home - *_especially_* when i feel stress is increasing and i sense a lack of time creeping into my days. takes me 25mins a trip instead of 7mins on my bicycle, but i feel more at ease, energized and focussed afterwards. 🌱⚡
It depends what kind of commute it is... Taking public transportation can be very stressful. Or sitting in traffic knowing you already could be home with your kids is also stressful...
I've found the opposite. Sitting in traffic, and having no control over my time, was hugely stressful, especially knowing I'd have to go through the whole process of getting in the door, getting dressed, putting bags away etc.
Nowadays, there's finally time to decompress. Everything is finally efficient as it should always have been in the first place 😌
today is the day I realized that 5-6 hours of screen time a day is ABOVE AVERAGE??? this is troubling news… 5-6 hours is a pretty good day for me 😭
FR
Dawg…it’s like 15 hours for me…
its 10 hours for me its so over
@@huckleberry3522HOW?
@@huckleberry3522you shouldn’t even be awake for more than 16 hours and considering multiple hours of your time are probably going to work/school that’s very troubling
I realise Iv been doing this subconsciously by chosing to go on long walks for work rather than taking the bus, it just feels great to walk and reflect about your life
For those who are interested, I'd highly recommend assembling models and painting them. Keeps your hands occupied with the task that requires only patience, while keeping your mind free to roam.
I was actually going to ask if this should work for people with ADHD, but it sounds like this would be the answer.
Games Workshop agent spotted
@user-go1sl6rd7u
It's such an odd comment to write down when I've never mentioned anything related to GW, Warhammer, or anything.
If you don't know anything about Revell and their models of tanks, trains, or ships. Not like they are the only ones. From checking my collection, there is also Zvezda (better to avoid them in beginning, hassle to glue), Italeri, and Tamiya.
Heck, I even paint my own stuff that I 3D print (not recommend for the starters also!), lots of interesting stuff you can design on your own, like buildings, landmarks or with the help from Blender, rip models from games and so on.
The fact that you mentioned them when my post never did, tells me that you only invested in their miniatures, and never heard of others and developed old or new grievances due to their policies and actions (which are immoral, one must admit). Or you are throwing hate for the sake of hate.
Either way, expanding your horizons will help you.
Dr. K HITTING US WITH THE FACTS I DEF USE MY PHONE FOR LIKE 5 HOURS A DAY
Phones use is so insanely weird because you don’t even notice how much time is passing. I used to feel like the days were way too short, first time I cut out phone usage, I was like. “I have too much time. Now what.”
It's kind of dishonest though. Like I'm literally using Google voice to dictate while I burn cardboard in the burning barrels and tree branches. So like Even if I spend 3 hours on my phone it's like 3 hours I was spending doing other tasks anyway. So literally I'm like being told to cut out 10 minutes here and there to free up an entire chunk of time which I wouldn't really necessarily have too decompress.
I also don't have any problem sleeping whatsoever. Unless I'm like really excited and if I'm really excited not doing the thing I'm really exciting about is going to cause anxiety.
@makaisenki OK, why does your personal experince make the op's personal experince dishonest??? How does that work???
Exactly. Same with me
@@makaisenkiEvery one of those minutes you spent on your phone while doing some other task is a minute you could’ve spent decompressing instead. He’s not wrong.
@@babybirdhome I can't decompress while I'm doing yard work. Decompression is afterwards and a lot of my decompression is listening to stuff on my phone.
If I spend 8 hours sleeping, 5 hours on my phone, 3 hours doing chores, 9 hours at work, 3 hours relaxing with my wife, and an hour on meals... That's 29 hours what gives? Oh cause most of my phone time I'm doing something else like driving, or running errands with my wife cause she loves to drive.
The idea of my mind being unoccupied and able to decompress feels like a pipe dream
Hey usage used to be 11-12 hours..its usually 7-9 now every week. Im trying dr.K. IM TRYING I PROMISE 😣
Well done! You’re making progress and that’s awesome. You should be proud of yourself for that. Don’t give up!
Any progress is progress 👍 great work
awesome ❤
wishing you more success with your progress! You got this!
You know what? You are not just "trying", you already put your sh*t together...just keep doing one day at a time 👍
This man is changing my life a video at a time
The gym is a great place to do this for most people.
Out of all the sleep hygiene tips this one is the most important to me. I need that space to decompress after activity and especially screen time.
I usually hit 14-16 hours a day on my phone but it's watching Dr K vids in background.
Did you watch the video where he said that the best way to consume his content is to only watch 1 video and then think about the topic discussed
Evidently not @@talosgak1236
@@talosgak1236 Exactly. Otherwise most people just binge watch helpful videos and many of them don't even execute, just think.
Doesn't even have to be all at once either. Just take space in quiet moments to mull over things. While you're waiting for your food in the microwave, or walking between buildings at your college, or when you have downtime at work, or even just in between games of league when you're getting a snack.
You don't have to fill every moment of your life with entertainment. Take those moments and think about stuff, think about how your relationship is going and how you feel about it. Think about your friends or family and how you feel about them. Think about how you've been doing lately. Just take some time to think stuff over even if it's not strictly an emotional thought. It helps so so much
I don't usually write on youtube videos, but I have to say thank you! After very hard years, I started to really change things and one of the things that helped me the most in my worst days were your videos! I never thought it was possible to get completely out of that darkness I was living in! And now I am out!
Dr. K's comment just made me realise how good it is for my mental health to not own a personal smartphone. Commuting and working out gives me multiple hours per day where my mind can just wander.
When I was depressed my average was 15... hours a day. Now it's 6 and I still have a long path of healing~
I'm watching this while procrastinating on my phone before sleeping.
This is really healthy advice!! So helpful! Thank you!
That is very scary, I don't trust my brain not to be constantly stimulated, I listen to a book or TH-cam all say everyday from when I wake to to i fall a sleep, I have had many depressive episodes and I don't trust my brain to not jump down a rabbit hole of logic that brings me down. No mental activity besides studying then I listen I listen to music to keep my brain from self deleting
Playing music as you start this practice won’t hurt - as long as it doesn’t distract during mental exercise. Music can actually compliment activities such as meditation or journaling. I wouldn’t take “don’t use your phone” too literally. Yes don’t scroll on the phone when you’re meditating but using it for music can help.
My average time on the phone is 14 hours 40 minutes
😮😢
That is not something to flex
real
@@fettormia9633 I'm not flexing. I thought I was spending a maximum of 4 hours until I checked.
Yeah Bro 13 hours Clash royale huh?
Touché Dr. K❤
Dr K's advice is awesome. Thank you
Journalling has served me well with this
Journalying has done wonders to me in the past
I use my phone to listen to stuff whilst I do chores and activities.... so there's that
The chores would count as unstructured activity so just do them without listening to your phone :)
That does mean that you are still engaging in the use of media and you’re not allowing your brain to fully disconnect/decompress during that time. You’re still feeding it information.
If you remove the phone usage, you’ll be set. People used to have menial tasks and lots of time to think during them.
How much does it show?
@@jccuchvjvj show what?
Your right! Love this video.
i love journaling before bed
This is how journaling can help. Write out every thought and emotion and all of a sudden when you finish, your mind is quiet and empty.
I sometimes do my journal, meditation, reading and praying.
My 2 hours are spent watching you, great content, meditation is key before bed though, 100%
I'd also like to add a caviat that you should do this these things without listening to music (with words), a podcast, etc. Giving your mind time without other people's voices is important
This is excellent advice and god I wish it wasn't so addictive but yeah gotta get that meditating, journalling, or just sitting doing nothing/being with ur thoughts back. I will say tho I often have to walk/take transit so that's a good amount of time
Maybe it’s the ADHD, but I can’t be left completely to my own thoughts. I have to listen to something or be Very focused, otherwise my mind goes round in circles, I can’t think properly, and/or start to spiral 🌀
However, perhaps that’s because I never decompress my emotions properly 🤔
You are not alone bro. The fact that you felt the need to analyse yourself and give a reason in the reply section, says more about your ADHD. Its not your fault bro. Its the same for me too
no that is exactly what they are saying. you need to find alternative ways to deal with your throughts instead of just avoiding them by numbing or distracting. Its not that you can't by design, even though it may fairly be harder, its that you have developed a coping mechanism that isn't gonna help fixing it.
Hope you find some ways to start feeling better. Good luck, I know its damn hard but worth trying
@lightgivener my thoughts come on their own regardless if i do literally nothing. I can only kill it when i sleep
@@kani-licious yes, same. Your thoughts aren't bad or don't have to be. If they are overwhelming or stressful you can train to take breaks. Saying "this is what it is" doesn't mean "this is what it always has to be". Hope you find a way to make it better
This reminds me of what I think was a Zen Buddhist monk who said everyone should spend 30 minutes per day meditating, unless they don’t have time, in which case they should spend one hour a day meditating.
That kind of wisdom hits so hard!
I will give it a shot!
This is choice advice. Thanks Doc!
This is something I've discovered recently, and am trying to incorporate it into my daily habits
Most of the time on my phone each day is honestly my 3k plus music playlist on TH-cam. I probably spend actually 2-3 hours on the phone a day but my usage averages between 8.5-14 hours a day. I listen to music when driving, chilling, working, and doing nearly everything unless something I need to pay full attention to instead of listening to music. Although I try to listen to classical/baroque/romantic symphonies when it’s later at night or if I’m actually studying any topic that I’m trying to retain the information with less effort. I wasn’t the biggest fan of it most of my life with the exception of a few songs but in college music appreciation I ended up learning that it helps you actually focus. I tested it out when I was in 4 science major classes (4 hour classes each) and calculus I in the same semester which was 20 credit hours. If it wasn’t for the primarily baroque and classical music I would’ve had a much more significant time studying and retaining the information. When doing the test I would have headphones on listening to a mp3 player playlist that I let my teacher load on my device to ensure there wasn’t cheating because I put it on their computer. Was able to just listen to the music and all of the studying would come into vision in my minds castle with great ease even in highly intricate physiological processes.
Yeah but that's the thing. Even when doing the most mundane jobs, don't use your phone.
He got me there.
Idk if anyone will see this but I would recommend if you go to the gym to not wear headphones in the gym, this can make workouts go faster and allow you to decompress. It can also lead to more conversations in the gym as well.
Another case of the algorithm reading my mind lol have been struggling with this for the last 2 months. Literally falling asleep at night watching shows, reading, etc but the moment I get in the bed, all my worries sprout out and I ended up sleeping 3 to 4 hours after trying. Sometimes even coming back up again tired of rolling around bed doing nothing and I even went to work few times with less than 2 hours sleep (once without having slept at all)
The advice to spend one hour before bed even if it's really late and 'there's no time' to have a walk and think is spot on and will totally try cause at this point just getting 4 hours of sleep is a win to me. I go on ignoring my problems cause they're not urgent but then at night for some reason can't stop thinking and planning and worrying.
I recently watched your video on self control and it was great. Thank a lot. Still really love these short things. After hearing this I will try to journal before bed, like I've been called to. Thanks again ❤🙏
terima kasih Dr K😊😊
Thank you
I feel proud of myself today. 30 mins on phone outside of using it to work. Rest of day was productive.
Yes sir! 🫡
I love this guy! He is so right about phones
I suggest biking. Biking can be intense or can be leisure paced. You can space out riding a bike as long as the road condition is safe. You get a good amount of work while thinking about your emotions. That's a big time saver here
I feel so caught
The realest 🙏
Cut 30 minutes to an hour out of your daily youtube, tiktok and instagram time, and spend that time listening to some of that music you used to love listening to. You can do other things that doesn't require significant focus or concentration while you do so - just allow yourself some time and space to think.
I started walking down to my small towns port every week and it's been very relaxing. Sadly it's also been really cold recently. And it takes 3 hours out of my week end so it's hard to find a spot to be completely unavailable.
i'll give it a shot!
ill usually listen to music and have a nice vibe before i get hit with the sleep dream knock out combo
I really was ready to say i use my phone an hour a day, but i checked and it says 2 hrs so far today. You win this one Dr.K
Good advice
I had emotional issues even back in the day before the internet, and I still isolated alone in my room, doing nothing but staring at the wall. And still do, 30 years later.
Dr K calling me out rn 😂
Wow! That was a perfect impression of me.
Ty
Driving.
If I just want time to decompress, I hop in my car and drive around on the freeway for 20 minutes. This used to be at an office, but I’m wfh now and have to consciously drive to nowhere now.
“Which we both know!” Oh god why do you know me so well.
The way he weaponized our doom scrolling for good 😮
Soo real.
I laugh so much internally when people tell me they dont have time.
Because yea. I now make use of all youtube time for cardio or lifting. So when i look st my daily usage. I can proudly say 80% of that usage is pure working.
I have an hour to worry each day. Absolutely. And even if I’m on my phone, I can still worry. But the problem with that is that I’m constantly worrying about everything. My mom used to worry a lot, and it got modeled and projected into me. But I have to be a chain breaker. Even though she used to read the Bible she never took the time to heal. And healing can be hard in some places. I’m still trying to remind myself to save more money, but if I save $0, then it’s still $0. You can make something out of nothing. Anyway, I just try not to worry as much because I now know that I’m a child ofGod , the king, and I remind myself of Bible verses about not being anxious, and praying if I do feel anxious. So yeah, I absolutely could worry for an hour. Or even hours on end. But what good does it to me? Will I get all of those hours back? Or could I be using that time much more wisely.
me looking at WEEKLY screen time on my phone:
_25 minutes_
well then... looks like I definitely, truthfully do NOT have time! :D
In the past, people needed to create things irl to kill time. There were arcades, theme parks, food fairs, carnivals, events, sports, hobbies, clubs, books, etc. Going out was fun, and importantly, affordable. Nowadays, everything fun is (created) digital(ly), and too much time is killed. (See: the army of SWEs. Who knows how to run a carnival nowadays?)
Only problem when you got pockets of life where sitting with your thoughts causes insane distress.
I've been doing this daily for years and no one told me to. It just seemed like the natural thing to do. I usually do this before sleep for a few minutes, or while I'm cleaning the house since it helps pass the time faster and because I don't use that much brainpower to clean.
"look at your phone"
CRITICAL DAMAGE
"Look at your daily usage"
CRITICAL DAMAGE
Lol, that "look at your phone!" was personal
It doesn't stop after an hour dr.k
I have to journal like, a lot. Sometimes to even get up. I listen to subliminals while i do it but i don't think rain noises are the most stimulating lol. 😂
This really works with falling asleep. Some nights when I'm really wired, I have to force my brain to "turn off", and then my body just sinks into the mattress. About 10 minutes after that, I'm finally asleep.
I enjoy a game before bed and dont
have this problem. It seems like if i enjoy something in my head regardless of what im doing this isnt an issue
Can I listen to music for this? Because I often listen to music, and completely stop paying attention to it, and like zone out. Like, my body will kinda dance to the music, but I’m 100% not listening to the music.
IDK when I listen to music I focus on the music 100 percent. So I think you should cut the music off if you want real space. This is easy to say but it's actually really tough for me personally. Glad you asked this though because I feel it's definitely easier to solve other people's problems than your own.
i think the point is to let your mind get bored and untangle its thoughts. Listening to music is still a form of distraction, similarly to how scrolling through social media is a form of distraction.
I have a bedtime routine that works. I've had it since I can remember, and I kept to it. Works like a charm. It's secret, though. Can't give away success for free.
My thinking time is when I play grindy rpgs. Just mindless grinding gives me time to process stuff while still enjoying myself
Is journaling on your computer while listening to music (either relaxed or agitated) a good way to do this?
So one hour a day especially before bed doing contemplative or expressive activities works to manage emotions answer thoughts daily.
Phone use is odd because of how many different things we use them for.
Music, television, reading, recipee while cooking.
That's not even considering talking, texting, video chat.
There are some things I absolutely have to have my phone.
I go on bikerides on the trail. Spent 1100 dollars on a brand new bike. best money i ever spent. i dont even have to go very far but im getting better. I just go till i feel like turning around. Usually 3 or 4 miles out and then 4 miles back in thats a good amount of time all by yourself
Just do this during a walk and this way you get some fresh air and much needed exercise, even if you go to the gym, take that walk
Damn he called me out on my bullshit - guess I better get to writing my shit down now
It's not that i disagree with the suggestion. But, you can't equate cumulative daily phone consumption time with having access to an uninterrupted 1hr time slot before bed....to be alone. This won't work for a lot of people.
Makes sense
But how do you handle emotions in the moment?
wake up and immediately start thinking for the nexts nights sleep
But at that time i would still be preoccupied with my inner voices, i would have dialogues with myself that can lead to anxiety or exhaustion
Bro I'm gonna need more suggestions than just "go for a walk" or "journal if you want to." Walking at 8pm isn't really an option for me and I don't think I can journal for an hour straight
i get over 10 hours a day, mostly listening to music every day
My job requires use of phone so my usage would probably be skewed in what was for work and what was for entertainment purposes. But it is p insane we use it every waking moment of our lives
Unfourtunaly, i just checked my phone's recorded screen rime stats. Now im depressed. I thought you were supposed to HELP me Dr.K! 😭. Nah im kidding but if you have a Android device, rhe digitatal wellbeing function is somthing that either helps you or hurts you lol
I go for long walks and listen to your videos. That's two birds with one stone, right? :-)
Sadly some people really don't have the time. I don't even have enough time to sleep correctly...
So today I forced my self out of the house and went and journaled in a cafe for 45 minutes and then made a new friend! ☺️
Nice!