@@agaborys3512 He was. He was truly something. He brought as much joy if not more to people than watching TV or doing something else. Whenever he would respond to someone he would make their day, week or even month depending how rough it was for someone.
@Irene rogers you are right, he was lying when he told us he was finally happy, that’s a sign of mania. People will often seem to be getting better just before things take a turn for the worse. It’s truly a shame we lost Byron.
Byron look im still here, even tho you are gone its a bit rough without you and your lovely content im sad and happy at the same time for you if you are reading this from heaven, you escaped the terror and darkness of this cruel world and free now but also feeling lonely and sad without you, i still cant believe i will never see you again until i die. Love you byron and praying for your father and mother.
do u think we all go to heaven even those who dont believe? maybe when death hits everyone will get the chance to stand in fromt of Jesus i hope. maybe its all a story but i choose and hope to believe❤
Seeing him say I am fine now hurt so bad. I miss Byron even though we only had a few interactions online together, he will always be an inspiration to me. R.I.P. Byron. Miss you homie.
Reckful is seriously way to humble and wholesome... This legend deserved way better... I'm so sorry you had to go through this, and that it led you to this point. Rest in peace legend.
Thank you for sharing that story Byron. You help others deal with similar situations and give us hope that we can reach a happy place in life. Keep up with the positivity
@@833tr00t I think that's what it is. Like, consciously, you hate your life and want to die. But when you can no longer fight for yourself, your subconscious brain, and animalistic will to survive rears its head. His brain loves life, his heart, not so much. I look forward to the day his heart and his brain are able to meet, have a chat, and leave each other with a sense that both sides can win.
@@FoulBundy I think that day is soon to come. He's already feeling a lot more positive about life, and it's quite clear when you watch his latest streams. I think he's finally coming to terms that things are going to be okay.
@@KubeKraft I agree. It's almost like, "Okay, now he's a """"""healthy""""" depressed." I use that term, very very loosely. Dr. K....... What a gem, he is. I feel like Byron got that new perspective. I was afraid it may have been a, "Pink cloud," of happiness. Seems to be more of him allowing himself to feel. He's becoming more human with every stream. I'm glad I found this guy back in the day. Not many people would show emotion on stream, in front of thousands. It's appreciated to see a fellow human struggle, but then start to find the rungs on the ladder to make it out of that hole.
Anti Parazi its me, El-Diablo fron Darktide! As a person who played this game for over a decade, I can honestly attest to the fact Anti Parazi was by far the #1 best dueler of Darktide and all of Asheron’s Call. He used to fight on a level 80 hero so he could kill people hundreds of levels higher than him in duels.
@@bennyadvent Don't worry, that was just a troll trying to make himself feel superior. I also hope he sees this. That would be some awesome Nostalgia for him.
Man he was an amazing, lovely, human being. It really says a lot about the world we live in. RIP Byron, I really hope that you can feel in anyway the changes you´ve made in peoples lifes.
man, i miss him alot, everything still feels so unreal. I just want to be able to come home from work and watch reckful go live again. Rest in peace, thank you for all the years of content, laughs, and enjoyment. Until next time Byron, until next time.
Viewer since 2011... All the reckful videos, inspiring me to play rogue.. The guy excelled at everything he put his mind to.. I think focusing on these things helped him escape his reality his brain created for him.. He was one of the few genuine streamers who had a contagious spirit for enjoying life. I'll always remember him. It's sad as a non religious person to imagine whats after death, why must we lose a individual like Byron in this world, but i'm happy he's not enduring pain anymore.. RIP Reckful, i'll carry your infectious spirit with me for life.
I hope and have chosen to believe in life after death. No matter what I respect Reckful and know hes in a better place now, no matter if thats the void after or in heaven. ❤
Wish I watched his streams back then. I was aware of him, saw him a few times as the most viewed person in whatever category he was in, must've caught a few streams of his... but I never really cared about Twitch or whatever around that time. Man, catching up on all his stuff now, makes me miss him so much and I regret not spending the time to actually watch him when he was alive. RIP Byron, wherever you may be now, hope you're taking it easy my man.
I never knew or met reckful. But watching all of these old videos makes me think everyone that had a chance to know him was blessed. Life is to short boys, cherish it while you can. RIP this beautiful person Byron.
Damn Byron/Reckful's stories are all crazy, He has been so talented even at the age of 10 in MMORPGs it really is impressive to me as an MMO enthusiast who started at the age of 13. I was far from being that good and even if I don't know him as much as some of you guys I really do feel sad for what happened to him. I do believe that he was an incredibly genuine person and what he managed to achieve despite all the adversities he's been through just make him even more deserving. R.I.P Reckful and thank you for having been part of our journey.
I think there was a method to his madness, able to zone out his depression and funnel into games where he could hyper focus... He was so talented and he never even knew it, i miss him a lot.. Twitch really enjoyed a space where his genuine personality shined.
Reckful you mean the world to so many people and you made so many people happy when they were down with your amazing personality including me ❤️❤️❤️ we love you Byron
My parents were both heroin addicts and Ive had a shitty childhood too, got diagnosed borderline recently (21 now) constantly feeling depressed/empty/goal-less, so sad honestly when I see you becoming emotional on the end here :/ I relate allot to how you feel its very hard to open up sometimes thanks man! You inspire me
I know you were hurting Reckful, I as well as a lot of others think the same as you, but now we all carry this pain. I know it makes no difference but I wish something could have helped you carry on. I felt the same about Byron's passing as I did my 16yo cousin who took her life too last year. She was the only friend i had made in 7 years. I love and miss her and Byron so much I don't have the words. We pissed chat :(
That story at the end about him trying to kill himself and being sad that he woke up alive and then him finally being happy now really hits different in light of recent events. Rest in peace man.
I'm happy that reckful is never again miserable. That being said I'm devastated since I identify so hard with him. Obviously he's had it tougher than I, but I always found comfort in that if he can pull through then so can I. I don't think twitch will ever feel the same again.
Same the only difference is that he's the one we lost, he was like that cool goofy uncle i never had he was smart and strong and talented and friendly. I would've left the world with him but i have a little brother myself and don't want to repeat the cycle. I just wanna hug him and say thxs.
Damn, it was actually almost a miracle he didn't pass the first time.. Even as sad as it is that he went in the end, I'm very glad that he managed to survive his first attempt and to go on to spread joy for others for quite some time before it finally took him away from us. A real legend, shame he never got the help he needed.
I have so much more respect for him now that I know some of his life story❤️ Just know at times your not alone and that other people might be struggling with similar problems ❤️
i come to this video every now and then, its like he tried to trick himself in the end by atleast lying and saying its an happy ending, he tried to jinx himself into feeling happy, but its never that easy, its like a dark pit inside that slowly consumes you
Man Byron, every time I watch these videos of yours I can't help but get this overwhelming feeling that we understand each other way more than you even know. I'm the same age as you and I also started playing WoW in TBC, and have dealt with very similar social issues, depression, etc. I used to watch your stream all the time back in the day, and I even donated some money to you once to share a liquid dnb mix that I made with you. Months later I found out that you were still playing that mix and it made me feel really appreciated. It was the one that had the song "I need a dollar, dollar, dollar that's what I need. hey hey!" I thought it was so perfect because it always seemed to get you some extra donations hahah. I loved watching Talb stream too. You guys are good dudes and I wish you the best. Maybe I'll apply for a position helping develop your game when one opens up. I'd really like to spend my life with more like-minded people rather than living so alone and isolated. Keep up the good work!!
Ayyy, another highschool dropout. I dropped out of high-school as well due to quite a few things. my brother passed away due to pneumonia on February 5th, 2013 at 11:05 pm, he was 19 and I was 14 at the time. I remember it like it happened yesterday because I looked at the time for some reason as soon as he fell to the floor. I was also playing a game called 10 million on the phone.. that night I listened to a song called Dreamer by tunedef for a while and can't listen to it anymore because every time I do, I start to feel how I felt that day. a year later I start cutting myself and then go through a few bad relationships. fast forward to 2015 and I'm going through a major surgery at Toronto sick kids. I had this weird thing called "Pectus Carinatum" where my chest sticks out weirdly and wanted it fix. so they cut my chest open and fixed her up after about 9 and a half hours. I was there for a week and came out a new man, a new me - or so I thought, it didn't cure my self-esteem but I suppose it did later down the road. that year I dropped out, at the age of 15 going on 16. I got my first job at subway in 2016.. then quit after 6 months (I hate people, not really but I am introverted) and got a new job as a dishwasher in 2017, which lasted for 2 and half months because I got laid off, everyone did actually. funny story, 2 days before we all got laid off, we only had a single person come in. a regular who only grabbed a beer. yes, I still got paid that day. 2018 I got another job as a dishwasher which lasted a year and 1 month, quit due to really bad anxiety. oh, 2017 was also the year where my mental health started to get better because I was tired of being sad, and I wanted to get better. 2019 was pretty meh, started selling League of legends accounts for money. making a whopping $38 CDN for 9-12 hours of work. I live in a small town of 12,000 people and finding work is pretty rough to say the least, especially since it's winter but it is what it is. I do have other interests though, back in 2017-2018 I was trying to find my passion and was thinking what I liked as I child. it was writing, so I tried writing stories and kinda got it into. I got bored, then started doing screenwriting.. I enjoyed that a lot and actually made a 92 page script, but nothing came of it so I stopped. later in 2019, I started to write poems out of all things and enjoy it tremendously. I've written over 65+ poems since last October and still going at it just for the joy of it. not sure what my plans are for the future but that's alright, I'm only 21 and have like 60-70 years to go right? oh boy! lol. I'm a lot better though compared to how I was 4 years ago. my teenage life was pretty brutal especially since I had depression that entire time, but hey, if I didn't go through that then I wouldn't be who I am today. that and if I did stay in school, then I would have been brainwashed into thinking there are 52 different kinds of genders eh? anyways, this video made me realize that I still have a chance to prove everyone wrong, to prove that I can still be successful. Thank you reckful. and sorry for this long ass comment, I tend to do it a lot nowadays. probably because I don't talk to anyone due to the fact that all my friends have gone to college. they've been gone for years now and my best friend just left last year, he's doing game design. I wrote the lore for the weapons, characters and locations for one of his games, so that's cool. anyways, I hope you all have a wonderful day and for those who are young, cherish every single moment with your friends. seriously.
I dropped out into homeschooling because I was dealing with a high functioning sociopath, and no this isn't some assuming bs I know my stuff he was definitely one.
I never write comments or read long ass paragraphs, but fuck thanks for sharing. You’re quite good at writing. Keep up the good energy bro, you got something good coming, I feel it.
I'm so glad you woke up that morning and I'm very happy that you are doing better now. Please keep working with Dr.Kanojia and stay on this path. You have so much potential and the opportunity to help others who have been in your position.
I will never forget you Byron. You were an inspiration to us all and you helped so many people in this world realize their worth in life. I hope you're finally happy in the next adventure after this life. RIP
Man I didn't know him but my heart is f... broken after watching this. I wish he never did that such an AMAZING and humble person suffering inside for many many years. So sad story...
I watched this live, but I wasn't paying attention at the end when he told that last little bit, I heard the crying and turned and watched, but missed the context of it. Glad this video was made. It truly is always better over time. Best advice when you are sad, it will get better! you need hope.
I hope that if there is anyone who is going through similar things as you were, they get discouraged to do it because of this. I feel sorry that you had to go through this, and I'm glad that you are better now. ❤️
Idk if you will read this but people love you, and you being open with your stories and experiences truly help people, you make a difference and the world is a better place with you in it. Take care.
I'm not okay. He wasn't okay. I would give anything to still have him alive and be his friend. We have to re-connect as a species. Love can overcome anything.
25:20 poisoned my mind, straight choking up on lies. I know he passed, but it's obvious in this clip he is still living in that field the morning after just having woken up all sad, wish someone coulda been with him and steered him to a safer coping mech, so fucking tragic. Think you and I are similar in how emotional these digital spaces make me feel, seriously think we might've just been to autistic for the world to recognize our suffering. fucking miss watching you, it made me feel cool and happy dude
I can relate to getting made fun of at school for being smart, and giving up on trying. Funnily enough by the time I graduated high school, all the bullies were nice as pie. Turns out when they know you have been training kick boxing for a few years they get worried you might smack them in the mouth. It has had a lasting effect on me regardless. RIP mate, I'm sorry you couldn't find peace in this life, hopefully you are at peace now.
RIP i went through the same thing when everquest died i was 11 when i started, then maplestory then WOW because friends made me play then that died, its like having lifes you cant go back and revisit even tho most of us called those places home
You know what's wild? When you mentioned Thousand Oaks in the video. I don't live there anymore but when I was the most into WoW i did live there. I remember Reckful 3 being basically the coolest thing I had ever seen. So thank you for that. Anyway, glad you're still here with us. Hope you stay for a long time too.
Sugar Ray Robinson is widely considered the greatest boxer of all time by people who really know the sport. The most interesting thing about Sugar Ray Robinson (Ray Leonard knowingly borrowed his nickname later, with Robinson's eventual blessing) is that his name wasn't Ray, or Robinson. His real name was Walker Smith, Jr. And Walker Smith Jr. wasn't quite old enough to enter his first AAU tournament when he thought he was ready, so he borrowed his buddy's AAU boxing card and entered as him. His friend's name was Ray Robinson. Sugar Ray won that tournament and many others, earning the "sugar" part of the moniker for himself. And then he boxed his whole career -- the greatest in the history of boxing -- under his friend's name. Anyway it's a good thing he didn't get a lifetime ban for account sharing. RIP man.
I just realized Reck's dad had a rough life. His familiy passed away in nazi germany and now 2 of his sons are gone and he has 1 son now. peace and love to his Dad and reckful's family this must be hard to cope with man
im gonna miss his laugh the most it was just awesome i would smile everytime and that ending.... you can really tell struggled alot in his life RIP byron we will see you in the next 70 years anyway or so
R.I.P Byron, you were a Champion among men
So are you Jay Sea. You have great supporters behind you! stay awesome
champion among men? rofl
@@agaborys3512 He was. He was truly something. He brought as much joy if not more to people than watching TV or doing something else. Whenever he would respond to someone he would make their day, week or even month depending how rough it was for someone.
hey Jay Sea
@Seth Belfort lol why so mad?
The ending broke my heart.
it's so sad
i miss him so much
@Irene rogers you are right, he was lying when he told us he was finally happy, that’s a sign of mania. People will often seem to be getting better just before things take a turn for the worse. It’s truly a shame we lost Byron.
You people all disgust me
Byron look im still here, even tho you are gone its a bit rough without you and your lovely content im sad and happy at the same time for you if you are reading this from heaven, you escaped the terror and darkness of this cruel world and free now but also feeling lonely and sad without you, i still cant believe i will never see you again until i die. Love you byron and praying for your father and mother.
do u think we all go to heaven even those who dont believe? maybe when death hits everyone will get the chance to stand in fromt of Jesus i hope.
maybe its all a story but i choose and hope to believe❤
you are not alone bud
hearing him say im actually happy broke me so damn much
This is so sad man... I never wanted this day to come. You will be missed Byron. Rest in Peace. ❤
Seeing him say I am fine now hurt so bad. I miss Byron even though we only had a few interactions online together, he will always be an inspiration to me. R.I.P. Byron. Miss you homie.
Reckful is seriously way to humble and wholesome... This legend deserved way better... I'm so sorry you had to go through this, and that it led you to this point. Rest in peace legend.
You are actually one of the realest. No fake shit. No forcefull content creating. Just you.
The ending just fucks me up now, fucks me up so hard. I love you Byron.
You never even knew who I was, but I'm gonna love you anyhow.
Ah Waltz #2. Reckless was an Elliott fan as well.
love you m8. Not gonna lie it tears me up every time, i hope you can stay happy
I love people like you dude.
Such a tragedy, he was such a humble guy. RIP Legend :(
so sad seeing this now...this was my favorite video because of the inspirational ending...but now he's gone and I'm broken
Also I'm a therapist and I've made a discord support group to help reckful fans cope discord.gg/wmAj3V
@@Dudewithalaptop Link doesn't work :(
@@Dudewithalaptop Yeah the link doesn't work :/
Thank you for sharing that story Byron. You help others deal with similar situations and give us hope that we can reach a happy place in life. Keep up with the positivity
He unconsciously saved his own life in the car that night pretty wild
what do you mean? by ripping the bag of his head and not remembering that he did that then waking up and seeing he ripped the bag off his head?
Knave very wild
@@833tr00t I think that's what it is.
Like, consciously, you hate your life and want to die. But when you can no longer fight for yourself, your subconscious brain, and animalistic will to survive rears its head. His brain loves life, his heart, not so much.
I look forward to the day his heart and his brain are able to meet, have a chat, and leave each other with a sense that both sides can win.
@@FoulBundy I think that day is soon to come. He's already feeling a lot more positive about life, and it's quite clear when you watch his latest streams. I think he's finally coming to terms that things are going to be okay.
@@KubeKraft I agree. It's almost like, "Okay, now he's a """"""healthy""""" depressed." I use that term, very very loosely.
Dr. K....... What a gem, he is.
I feel like Byron got that new perspective. I was afraid it may have been a, "Pink cloud," of happiness. Seems to be more of him allowing himself to feel. He's becoming more human with every stream.
I'm glad I found this guy back in the day. Not many people would show emotion on stream, in front of thousands.
It's appreciated to see a fellow human struggle, but then start to find the rungs on the ladder to make it out of that hole.
we member you everyday bro, thx for being part of our life.
25:00 Ouch, that's hurting my heart. Hope you are in a happier place now Byron, hope you found piece
Anti Parazi its me, El-Diablo fron Darktide! As a person who played this game for over a decade, I can honestly attest to the fact Anti Parazi was by far the #1 best dueler of Darktide and all of Asheron’s Call. He used to fight on a level 80 hero so he could kill people hundreds of levels higher than him in duels.
@@CARLSOLBERG bruh what
sick dude! Hope reckful see's this!
@@bennyadvent Don't worry, that was just a troll trying to make himself feel superior. I also hope he sees this. That would be some awesome Nostalgia for him.
Just an FYI, he doesn't check his youtube. Send this on Twitter and he might see it.
Hes fokkin dead now...
Man he was an amazing, lovely, human being. It really says a lot about the world we live in. RIP Byron, I really hope that you can feel in anyway the changes you´ve made in peoples lifes.
The legend has fallen. Rest in peace Byron you will never be forgotten.
I think about him everyday, i really wanted to meet him
This video just got 1000x Sadder
man, i miss him alot, everything still feels so unreal. I just want to be able to come home from work and watch reckful go live again. Rest in peace, thank you for all the years of content, laughs, and enjoyment. Until next time Byron, until next time.
Yeah, man, I do too. RIP
Viewer since 2011... All the reckful videos, inspiring me to play rogue.. The guy excelled at everything he put his mind to.. I think focusing on these things helped him escape his reality his brain created for him.. He was one of the few genuine streamers who had a contagious spirit for enjoying life. I'll always remember him. It's sad as a non religious person to imagine whats after death, why must we lose a individual like Byron in this world, but i'm happy he's not enduring pain anymore.. RIP Reckful, i'll carry your infectious spirit with me for life.
I hope and have chosen to believe in life after death. No matter what I respect Reckful and know hes in a better place now, no matter if thats the void after or in heaven.
❤
Love you, man. Rest in paradise❤️
Wish he could see how many people looked up to him, love him and miss him. Rest easy
Wish I watched his streams back then. I was aware of him, saw him a few times as the most viewed person in whatever category he was in, must've caught a few streams of his... but I never really cared about Twitch or whatever around that time. Man, catching up on all his stuff now, makes me miss him so much and I regret not spending the time to actually watch him when he was alive. RIP Byron, wherever you may be now, hope you're taking it easy my man.
I truthfully miss this guy so much. He was a real dude.
he missed lethal, but he hit my heart
Although he's depressed and he has been through a lot yet he's still full of life; love you reckful it's good to see you happy
I feel his pain. The world is a hard place to be in. I love you reckful you will be missed
Damn... young Reckful was a good looking chad top-tier gamer, rather ahead of the curve
Yeah, back in the day reckful was gl dude, slayed chicks
9 fucking years ago, holy fucks time flies. instagram.com/p/TYD5/?igshid=b79absl2vdly
@@Copemaxx slayed bro !!!
@@Copemaxx reckful is still a pretty good looking dude tho
@@MattIsLoling cant argue, fucker got lucky with looks, only baldness stroke him hard, can be another reason why he was/is so depressed
I loved you so much man. I will never forget you Byron. I hope you’re better
off now.
I love you reckful. I felt like I knew you. Rest in peace man.
Glad you're feeling better man, depression really sucks. Love ya bro
I never knew or met reckful. But watching all of these old videos makes me think everyone that had a chance to know him was blessed. Life is to short boys, cherish it while you can. RIP this beautiful person Byron.
Damn Byron/Reckful's stories are all crazy, He has been so talented even at the age of 10 in MMORPGs it really is impressive to me as an MMO enthusiast who started at the age of 13. I was far from being that good and even if I don't know him as much as some of you guys I really do feel sad for what happened to him. I do believe that he was an incredibly genuine person and what he managed to achieve despite all the adversities he's been through just make him even more deserving.
R.I.P Reckful and thank you for having been part of our journey.
I think there was a method to his madness, able to zone out his depression and funnel into games where he could hyper focus... He was so talented and he never even knew it, i miss him a lot.. Twitch really enjoyed a space where his genuine personality shined.
Reckful you mean the world to so many people and you made so many people happy when they were down with your amazing personality including me ❤️❤️❤️ we love you Byron
Sadly he doesnt read comments on youtube rip
That ending hurts so much, RIP Byron
2022... still here dog never forgotten.
My parents were both heroin addicts and Ive had a shitty childhood too, got diagnosed borderline recently (21 now) constantly feeling depressed/empty/goal-less, so sad honestly when I see you becoming emotional on the end here :/ I relate allot to how you feel its very hard to open up sometimes thanks man! You inspire me
Aww Reckful, we all love ya so much. You're stories always leave an impact on me.
I know you were hurting Reckful, I as well as a lot of others think the same as you, but now we all carry this pain. I know it makes no difference but I wish something could have helped you carry on. I felt the same about Byron's passing as I did my 16yo cousin who took her life too last year. She was the only friend i had made in 7 years. I love and miss her and Byron so much I don't have the words. We pissed chat :(
My heart cried when he started to, holy shit i've gown attatched to that man!
I wish I got to hang out with you just one time friend. Reckful we are all still mourning :(
That story at the end about him trying to kill himself and being sad that he woke up alive and then him finally being happy now really hits different in light of recent events. Rest in peace man.
I'm happy that reckful is never again miserable. That being said I'm devastated since I identify so hard with him. Obviously he's had it tougher than I, but I always found comfort in that if he can pull through then so can I. I don't think twitch will ever feel the same again.
Same the only difference is that he's the one we lost, he was like that cool goofy uncle i never had he was smart and strong and talented and friendly. I would've left the world with him but i have a little brother myself and don't want to repeat the cycle. I just wanna hug him and say thxs.
Damn, it was actually almost a miracle he didn't pass the first time.. Even as sad as it is that he went in the end, I'm very glad that he managed to survive his first attempt and to go on to spread joy for others for quite some time before it finally took him away from us. A real legend, shame he never got the help he needed.
This is a such a genuine way to look at his impact and gratefulness of him being him for 30+ years. Thx for ur comment
I have so much more respect for him now that I know some of his life story❤️ Just know at times your not alone and that other people might be struggling with similar problems ❤️
Damn man, I miss you so much and it's only been a couple of days. RIP Byron!
Wt a Legend...! You Will never be forgotten brother
i come to this video every now and then, its like he tried to trick himself in the end by atleast lying and saying its an happy ending, he tried to jinx himself into feeling happy, but its never that easy, its like a dark pit inside that slowly consumes you
Man Byron, every time I watch these videos of yours I can't help but get this overwhelming feeling that we understand each other way more than you even know. I'm the same age as you and I also started playing WoW in TBC, and have dealt with very similar social issues, depression, etc. I used to watch your stream all the time back in the day, and I even donated some money to you once to share a liquid dnb mix that I made with you. Months later I found out that you were still playing that mix and it made me feel really appreciated. It was the one that had the song "I need a dollar, dollar, dollar that's what I need. hey hey!" I thought it was so perfect because it always seemed to get you some extra donations hahah. I loved watching Talb stream too. You guys are good dudes and I wish you the best. Maybe I'll apply for a position helping develop your game when one opens up. I'd really like to spend my life with more like-minded people rather than living so alone and isolated. Keep up the good work!!
🥺
Ayyy, another highschool dropout. I dropped out of high-school as well due to quite a few things. my brother passed away due to pneumonia on February 5th, 2013 at 11:05 pm, he was 19 and I was 14 at the time. I remember it like it happened yesterday because I looked at the time for some reason as soon as he fell to the floor. I was also playing a game called 10 million on the phone.. that night I listened to a song called Dreamer by tunedef for a while and can't listen to it anymore because every time I do, I start to feel how I felt that day. a year later I start cutting myself and then go through a few bad relationships.
fast forward to 2015 and I'm going through a major surgery at Toronto sick kids. I had this weird thing called "Pectus Carinatum" where my chest sticks out weirdly and wanted it fix. so they cut my chest open and fixed her up after about 9 and a half hours. I was there for a week and came out a new man, a new me - or so I thought, it didn't cure my self-esteem but I suppose it did later down the road. that year I dropped out, at the age of 15 going on 16. I got my first job at subway in 2016.. then quit after 6 months (I hate people, not really but I am introverted) and got a new job as a dishwasher in 2017, which lasted for 2 and half months because I got laid off, everyone did actually. funny story, 2 days before we all got laid off, we only had a single person come in. a regular who only grabbed a beer. yes, I still got paid that day. 2018 I got another job as a dishwasher which lasted a year and 1 month, quit due to really bad anxiety. oh, 2017 was also the year where my mental health started to get better because I was tired of being sad, and I wanted to get better.
2019 was pretty meh, started selling League of legends accounts for money. making a whopping $38 CDN for 9-12 hours of work. I live in a small town of 12,000 people and finding work is pretty rough to say the least, especially since it's winter but it is what it is. I do have other interests though, back in 2017-2018 I was trying to find my passion and was thinking what I liked as I child. it was writing, so I tried writing stories and kinda got it into. I got bored, then started doing screenwriting.. I enjoyed that a lot and actually made a 92 page script, but nothing came of it so I stopped. later in 2019, I started to write poems out of all things and enjoy it tremendously. I've written over 65+ poems since last October and still going at it just for the joy of it. not sure what my plans are for the future but that's alright, I'm only 21 and have like 60-70 years to go right? oh boy! lol.
I'm a lot better though compared to how I was 4 years ago. my teenage life was pretty brutal especially since I had depression that entire time, but hey, if I didn't go through that then I wouldn't be who I am today. that and if I did stay in school, then I would have been brainwashed into thinking there are 52 different kinds of genders eh? anyways, this video made me realize that I still have a chance to prove everyone wrong, to prove that I can still be successful. Thank you reckful. and sorry for this long ass comment, I tend to do it a lot nowadays. probably because I don't talk to anyone due to the fact that all my friends have gone to college. they've been gone for years now and my best friend just left last year, he's doing game design. I wrote the lore for the weapons, characters and locations for one of his games, so that's cool. anyways, I hope you all have a wonderful day and for those who are young, cherish every single moment with your friends. seriously.
I dropped out into homeschooling because I was dealing with a high functioning sociopath, and no this isn't some assuming bs I know my stuff he was definitely one.
Really enjoyed reading that, thank you for sharing! Best of luck to you in your future endeavors :D
I never write comments or read long ass paragraphs, but fuck thanks for sharing. You’re quite good at writing. Keep up the good energy bro, you got something good coming, I feel it.
Thanks for sharing man i loved reading your story , i really appreciate it ♥️♥️
Much love to you homie you're a strong individual
I'm so glad you woke up that morning and I'm very happy that you are doing better now. Please keep working with Dr.Kanojia and stay on this path. You have so much potential and the opportunity to help others who have been in your position.
Bro
That ending hit me too hard
missed lethal FeelsGoodMan
@Jano van Pelt im fucking crying
Same
Now, it hits even harder.
rest in peace man i loved your streams so much.. i miss you!
Miss you, man.
I didn't know about you until it was too late but it was great just listening to you talk. I hope you're in a better place now
I'm so sorry, Byron. You were so loved (by complete strangers no less). I hope you knew that.
I will never forget you Byron. You were an inspiration to us all and you helped so many people in this world realize their worth in life. I hope you're finally happy in the next adventure after this life. RIP
that story about sending pics of brother to Destiny's Cry is gold
rest in peace reckful you are truly a legend
Man I didn't know him but my heart is f... broken after watching this. I wish he never did that such an AMAZING and humble person suffering inside for many many years. So sad story...
I watched this live, but I wasn't paying attention at the end when he told that last little bit, I heard the crying and turned and watched, but missed the context of it.
Glad this video was made.
It truly is always better over time.
Best advice when you are sad, it will get better! you need hope.
I hope that if there is anyone who is going through similar things as you were, they get discouraged to do it because of this. I feel sorry that you had to go through this, and I'm glad that you are better now. ❤️
Idk if you will read this but people love you, and you being open with your stories and experiences truly help people, you make a difference and the world is a better place with you in it. Take care.
dammm went from happy to listening to the whole thing , ending just broke me .
I'm not okay. He wasn't okay. I would give anything to still have him alive and be his friend. We have to re-connect as a species. Love can overcome anything.
25:20 poisoned my mind, straight choking up on lies. I know he passed, but it's obvious in this clip he is still living in that field the morning after just having woken up all sad, wish someone coulda been with him and steered him to a safer coping mech, so fucking tragic. Think you and I are similar in how emotional these digital spaces make me feel, seriously think we might've just been to autistic for the world to recognize our suffering. fucking miss watching you, it made me feel cool and happy dude
Love you dude
you are such a nice guy honestly
That ending got me. Rest In Peace.
HOW CAN I DOUBLE LIKE?!?! Wow reckful your best video so far!!! So intimate and inspirational :)
I love you, and miss you Byron. I hope wherever you are you've found solace.
Holy shit the end hit really fucking hard, it is amazing how open he is !
Itamar you have wonderful sons. Sending love.
Love you man thanks for being so open.
Thanks for sharing Byron. Love you long time
RIP my Brother. I'm sorry you couldn't find that peace. Damn shame! TY for your life! You will be missed!! Knowing how it all ended, MAN THAT ENDING!!
I can relate to getting made fun of at school for being smart, and giving up on trying. Funnily enough by the time I graduated high school, all the bullies were nice as pie. Turns out when they know you have been training kick boxing for a few years they get worried you might smack them in the mouth. It has had a lasting effect on me regardless. RIP mate, I'm sorry you couldn't find peace in this life, hopefully you are at peace now.
RIP i went through the same thing when everquest died i was 11 when i started, then maplestory then WOW because friends made me play then that died, its like having lifes you cant go back and revisit even tho most of us called those places home
You described the feeling so well, although in my case was a different game.
great video byron, awesome to see you feeling good!
Thanks for sharing your story man. You've always been my favorite streamer and WoW player!
You know what's wild? When you mentioned Thousand Oaks in the video. I don't live there anymore but when I was the most into WoW i did live there. I remember Reckful 3 being basically the coolest thing I had ever seen. So thank you for that. Anyway, glad you're still here with us. Hope you stay for a long time too.
Sugar Ray Robinson is widely considered the greatest boxer of all time by people who really know the sport. The most interesting thing about Sugar Ray Robinson (Ray Leonard knowingly borrowed his nickname later, with Robinson's eventual blessing) is that his name wasn't Ray, or Robinson. His real name was Walker Smith, Jr. And Walker Smith Jr. wasn't quite old enough to enter his first AAU tournament when he thought he was ready, so he borrowed his buddy's AAU boxing card and entered as him. His friend's name was Ray Robinson. Sugar Ray won that tournament and many others, earning the "sugar" part of the moniker for himself. And then he boxed his whole career -- the greatest in the history of boxing -- under his friend's name.
Anyway it's a good thing he didn't get a lifetime ban for account sharing. RIP man.
I just realized Reck's dad had a rough life. His familiy passed away in nazi germany and now 2 of his sons are gone and he has 1 son now. peace and love to his Dad and reckful's family this must be hard to cope with man
im gonna miss his laugh the most it was just awesome i would smile everytime and that ending.... you can really tell struggled alot in his life RIP byron we will see you in the next 70 years anyway or so
RIP bro. I have my own mental struggles
I love this man so much 💙 stay strong brother
Glad you're feeling better these days reckful. Remember we're all in this together, life hits harder sometimes but you deserve to be happy.
Thanks for being alive
I still play Asheron's Call on the Coldeve emu server.
somzbody must
much love man. stay amazing :)
I feel really bad for laughing when I saw someone say he missed lethal in the chat after the suicide story
Dude
not your problem
Didnt aged well.
@@odw1n307 Yeah, feels pretty bad. :( I miss him a lot.
Are you still laughing?
Love you reckful thanks for sharing. So glad you're doing better now!
It is really dark to know even when u are successful but still past is with you and u cant scape dark days u had😔
Oh he seem so sweet! Rest in peace 😢❤️
thanks for the lore
byron!! love you so much
Great story Reckful! Thanks for sharing brother!
Wish you were still here.
I wish we could go back and tell 6th grade Byron "WHO CARES if they like you? Being liked means nothing. Absolutely nothing."