MY FIRST SUICIDE ATTEMPT WITH A ROPE. HANGING MYSELF... WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW.

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 24 มิ.ย. 2024
  • ======================================================
    Episode 12 | FAQ: I want to commit suicide...
    ======================================================
    National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
    Call 1-800-273-8255
    Available 24 hours everyday
    ======================================================
    My name is Travis Balitz. I have been living with Bipolar Disorder since 2008. I have had many other diagnosis such as anxiety, depression, schizoaffective disorder and bipolar type 2 . I am currently diagnosed with bipolar type 1. There have been many ups and downs in my life. Here on this channel I am advocate for Mental Health. I share my experiences, good and bad and in between. I also give advice and share my general experience with hospitalizations, partial hospitalizations, group homes (IRTS), dialectical behavioral therapy, personal therapy, psychiatric experiences and my knowledge on all of the medications I have been on. I hope you can learn something from my channel. Also do not be afraid to reach out if you are in a dire situation. Please contact the suicide hotline if you are at a risk for your mental health. Number is here: 800-273-8255. Text BRAVE to 741741. Thank you.
    ======================================================
    Hi guys, this is Travis. I have a passion for art and music. Please check out my other links below and support me and my cause! I am now accepting commission work for traditional hyperrealistic drawings and airbrush portraits, hybrid realism and abstract acrylic art, and graphic design. I also make websites. Below is access to my music which can be bought and downloaded. I also commission beats, soundtracks and songs.
    My Songs:
    / realgroupstation
    realgroupstation.bandcamp.com
    www.soundclick.com/travist
    My Soundtracks:
    / 2uo7rax
    2uo7rax.bandcamp.com
    www.2uo7rax.com
    My Piano Covers:
    / 2uo12iano
    / 2uo12iano
    Music Instagram:
    / its.travist
    Art:
    www.travisbalitz.com/artwork
    / artworkbytravis
    Fitness:
    I recently lost over 55+ lbs in 2 years. I plan on making a TH-cam Channel called Beyond Bipolar Fitness. Here you will see an hybrid of fitness with an emphasis on mental health.
    / beyondbipolarfitness
    Business:
    Portfolio: www.travisbalitz.com
    Facebook: / its.travist
    Instagram: / travis.balitz
    LinkedIn: / travisbalitz
    ======================================================
    Mental Illness Music I Composed, Wrote And Sung:
    • Official Music Videos ...
    Beyond Bipolar Fitness:
    • DESIRE: The FUEL For ...
    Motivational Speeches:
    • Words Of Wisdom
    Reaction Videos:
    • Reaction Videos
    Mental Health Video Documentaries:
    • Mental Health Video Do...
    Mental Health Awareness:
    • Mental Health Awareness
    Classic Mental Health VLogs:
    • Classic Bipolar Vlogs
    That's Mental:
    • That's Mental
    ======================================================
    / beyondbipolarblog
    / beyondbipolari
    ======================================================
    #mentalhealth #bipolar #suicide #depression #anxiety #mentalhealthawareness #borderline #psychology #psychiatry #therapy #mania #lithium #schizophrenia #personalitydisorder #vlog #anorexia #addiction #adoption #adoptee #koreanadoptee #kad #education #inspirational #nami #hospitalized #drugs #psychosis #mentaldisorder #disabled #fitness #workout #bodybuilding

ความคิดเห็น • 144

  • @richardlongmore9301
    @richardlongmore9301 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +49

    I don’t want support I’m mentally ill and sick of this soulless cruel life

    • @MrDanga
      @MrDanga 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I hear you

    • @deimosok2003
      @deimosok2003 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      That part of the brain which wants our DNA to survive brought us here

    • @danika6192
      @danika6192 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hey idk what you are going thru but the Lord Jesus really saves, i was in the same place as you but the love of Jesus really saved me. You are never alone Jesus is always with you and he loves and cares for you. Once you let the Lord into your life you will always feel happy, pleasant and content you will honestly never feel sad again because you know the Lord is on his throne and he loves you and everything is gonna be okay. May God bless you and take care of you. I love you

    • @user-vw8dj1it1x
      @user-vw8dj1it1x 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I feel you man

    • @joannmarie1971
      @joannmarie1971 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      The fact that this society depresses you shows you have depth.

  • @abdelhamidsherif4995
    @abdelhamidsherif4995 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +30

    Well, I live with the fact that I am going to end it all one day; I just defer the action one day at a time...... it is very strange to live on autopilot, cooking, cleaning, going to class, or doing work when you know for sure that you would end it one day.......

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      depression can kill you... hopefully there are ways you feel hopeful. if not hope you find away to solve the problem

    • @abdelhamidsherif4995
      @abdelhamidsherif4995 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I know it can kill me and it will eventually, I am afraid I cannot find any of those ways @@BeyondBipolarBlog

    • @darrenjamesburnside
      @darrenjamesburnside 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I'm always here to talk to or be a friend if you need it.

    • @danika6192
      @danika6192 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hey idk what you are going thru but the Lord Jesus really saves, i was in the same place as you but the love of Jesus really saved me. You are never alone Jesus is always with you and he loves and cares for you. Once you let the Lord into your life you will always feel happy, pleasant and content you will honestly never feel sad again because you know the Lord is on his throne and he loves you and everything is gonna be okay. May God bless you and take care of you. I love you, you can do all things thru the LORD who strengthens you. YOUVE GOT THIS AND YOU MATTER!!

  • @fren2424
    @fren2424 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +24

    I tried it, first my whole body got tingly and my breath got cut off, then I started to fade away, I got regret and fortunately there was a box where I steped on so I survived, it is impossible to survive without anything to step on.
    I cried a lot...

    • @danika6192
      @danika6192 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Hey idk what you are going thru but the Lord Jesus really saves, i was in the same place as you but the love of Jesus really saved me. You are never alone Jesus is always with you and he loves and cares for you. Once you let the Lord into your life you will always feel happy, pleasant and content you will honestly never feel sad again because you know the Lord is on his throne and he loves you and everything is gonna be okay. May God bless you and take care of you. I love you

    • @BrostroTheWizard
      @BrostroTheWizard 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      the fact you left the box there means you never wanted to do it. glad you are okay.

    • @IrfanAhmad-yc7tw
      @IrfanAhmad-yc7tw หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      At what point you feel that you are going to be no more.

    • @Tethloach1
      @Tethloach1 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@IrfanAhmad-yc7tw
      Lucky few - ends 10 sec to 30 secs
      Most people - 1 min to 5 min (slow process)
      Unlucky ones - 10 min to never (brain damage/life support)

  • @shirooni111
    @shirooni111 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    I'm guilty, for ruining my own life and having problems. I'm guilty for feeling the way I feel about miniature problems that I blow out of proportion while there are literal children thar are dying of hunger somewhere. I'm guilty of feeling this way given how privileged I am. I'm so guilty.

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      guilt is a problem of depression and medication can help relieve that guilt. It is all based on mood and perspective if you feel like crap your world feels like crap and it can help a ton while being on the right medicaoin.

    • @danika6192
      @danika6192 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hey idk what you are going thru but the Lord Jesus really saves, i was in the same place as you but the love of Jesus really saved me. You are never alone Jesus is always with you and he loves and cares for you. Once you let the Lord into your life you will always feel happy, pleasant and content you will honestly never feel sad again because you know the Lord is on his throne and he loves you and everything is gonna be okay. May God bless you and take care of you. I love you

  • @TugomaHughJohnson
    @TugomaHughJohnson ปีที่แล้ว +14

    There's the fear within me of who my death would hurt. Every day I feel as if I'm only alive to prevent hurting others, although I feel like I've been a burden to everyone I've ever met regardless. I just wish I could start my life over or simply materialize out of existence, having any memory of me purged from everyone's minds.

    • @snoopy1390
      @snoopy1390 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I want to personally assure you that you are NEVER a burden. I don't care how rough it feels some days, how stressful you may feel in dealing with family or friends. I can promise you that if you take your life, you would be leaving your loved ones with a far greater pain than you can imagine. I just lost someone so dear to me by suicide and it has broken me like nothing ever has. I went from being the most faith filled person, the most positive joyful person to now being a crushed shell...when you take your life, it actually puts all your loved ones at a closer risk of taking their own.
      God has created you with LOVE and a special purpose that only YOU can fulfill. You may not even see that purpose, but trust me it's there.💙🩵

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      i think to get things started it is best to at least be honest about your thoughts which is pretty decent here. But really the next step is trying to find other methods to manage a better life. It isn't going to be perfect, and rarely ever good for that matter, but the fact you got through the day deserves a pat on the back. Essentially I have been really struggling this past month after my dog died, and essentially this past 3 months really, but things seem to get better, unsure why maybe I really did hit my head and just went into a spiral, it is to the point where the psyche has been really encouraging me to do TMS, but i dont know really trying to hold back from it, and take it day by day. Finding a purpose is crucial to maintain the will to live. A journal of goals, building a social network is hard, but it is essential to figure out what to do, whether it is med discussion therapy, a part time job, volunteering, explore all options, it really sucks during the worst days, but hopefully during the good days you have enough motivation to get started, I do hope you find ways to make peace, Trav

    • @Gautam1108
      @Gautam1108 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Please read this book called "The courage to be disliked"

  • @CrackDCat
    @CrackDCat 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    Hey, thanks for putting yourself out there and telling us some of this it takes tremendous courage. Thank you for staying with us, to share this advice, I and I'm sure others definitely appreciate it :)

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I appreciate that!

    • @CrackDCat
      @CrackDCat 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@BeyondBipolarBlog It's no problem mate, stay safe, like you told us, you're a strong person that's endured hardship and come out hardened, in mentality, a warrior. Have a great day :)

  • @davider3568
    @davider3568 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Travis, glad you are still with us and hope that things are getting better for you.

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      thank you i am doing much better

  • @nancygee3137
    @nancygee3137 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    I dont have family or friends that care. I dont have money to live. I dont want to die. I just can't afford to live.

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      if it gets that bad time to consider medication or a hospital stay. Perhaps try to get on disability if its that invasive. If at all possible. If not, therapy can help as well.

    • @noname29288
      @noname29288 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Same here

    • @g-yu6yj
      @g-yu6yj หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      ​@@BeyondBipolarBlogi tried medication it makes it worse

    • @MisterMooster
      @MisterMooster 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@BeyondBipolarBlog Sadly most people report that these hospital stays make things worse, that they keep you trapped and don't offer much therapy, just medication, not solutions. Dr Jordan Peterson has good ideas on this- people needs friends, family, money, ideally a partner- people need solutions for these problems, which the hospitals don't offer. A good therapist can help if they focus on these issues, but so often they use ineffective therapies they were taught in school.

  • @Crystalquartz964
    @Crystalquartz964 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    I lost my friend to hanging last week. It is a devastating loss. She was 67 years old

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      so sorry to hear that, i hope you are coping with it.

  • @Quinnbaby
    @Quinnbaby 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    I was having thoughts today . And TH-camd how to do this . And your video was the first . Thank you so much. Because of you, my kids still have their mom.

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      ah awhile back ago hoep you are safe and sound. Kids should mean a lot to you as a mother, i dont have children but im close to my family, and i know regrets come and go the selfless thing is knowing you are their for your family. I hope you do your best to live the best life. cheers.

    • @deimosok2003
      @deimosok2003 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      You have a family why tf do u want to do that to urself? I wish I was you. I have diabetes type 1 since I was a kid and severe tinnitus for 24/7 while jobless and hopeless. Think again would your life be better if you were me? I have TRUE reasons to do that. You don’t. Don’t you have a husband? he can provide for you you know

    • @danika6192
      @danika6192 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hey idk what you are going thru but the Lord Jesus really saves, i was in the same place as you but the love of Jesus really saved me. You are never alone Jesus is always with you and he loves and cares for you. Once you let the Lord into your life you will always feel happy, pleasant and content you will honestly never feel sad again because you know the Lord is on his throne and he loves you and everything is gonna be okay. May God bless you and take care of you. I love you

  • @joannmarie1971
    @joannmarie1971 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    i am glad you are still alive!!❤

  • @NoNarcotics
    @NoNarcotics 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    I know I'm here for other reasons but holy fuck this mic quality is insane 💀

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Haha just a decent video recorder thanks for watching

  • @user-ui5wz7gj7s
    @user-ui5wz7gj7s 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thnk u for this man fr u gota good heart

  • @soranightstorm9262
    @soranightstorm9262 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    hey there i'm currently writing a story that has a character trying to commit such acts after being abused for who he is the story isn't done yet but it's heavy with different types of topics being put among the pages so far i have put up to nine chapters so far trying to try for 18 chapters now

  • @snoopy1390
    @snoopy1390 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    To everyone here, he's right, YOU MATTER. I just lost someone to suicide and cannot tell you the immense pain it leaves in the world. I know in those horribly low moments you're deeply entrenched in your own pain, I get it, truly.
    But the part you don't think of is that if you take your life, you now leave all the rest of your family and friends with your pain. All of them now have na higher risk of suicide...all of them are left guilty and confused without answers, and wishing they could've showed you how much you matter. Please know that you are in my prayers, we don't have to know each other personally, fact is YOU ARE IN MY PRAYERS. 💙

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      it is so crucial to reach out, cause that split second decision could actually save someone. And this is critical to the one in question regarding wanting to take their own life. It is so hard if you are depressed, hopeless and cant see the value, but thats why during good days it is very critical to reach out cause at least you have the energy to try. However, during the bad days, it is critical to find someone to rely on, and that is really hard cause I know when down you want someone to reach out to you you just dont know where or how at that moment. Sometimes finding ways to relax, sleeping it off, no matter how uncomfortable it is, doing alternative methods music art therapy, or journaling, reading whatever can distract at that moment is helpful. I dont have all the answers, but I do know what has worked for me. And for the most part trying to sleep it off is essentially better than me wanting to risk getting up and doing something harmful. I just know when I am like that I think it, but the fact that I dont act on the impulse takes training and you can find ways to save youreslf from bodily harm.

    • @snoopy1390
      @snoopy1390 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @BeyondBipolarBlog Absolutely, reaching out is key, to find someone you trust who won't panic or judge you in that moment but simply BE THERE for you to get through it. Sadly the man I loved tried reaching out in a couple ways to myself and his family the day he took his life...we didn't realize that he was actually thinking of doing it. We knew hr was having a rough day but he didn't actually tell me he was thinking of harming himself. He truly tried hard to stay with us 😣 He even told me he was so depressed about something that he might just "try and sleep it away" as you mentioned as well. Apparently later in the day he did tell a family member he was "afraid he might do something bad". All just so heartwrenching for all of us after we put the pieces together and found him days after he'd taken his life. So to all reading this, PLEASE do reach out to anyone, doesn't even matter who, just someone who can be there with you, stay on the phone with you, come over and stay with you. Your life matters and your fellow humans will gladly be there with you to help.

  • @SoulButterflyXo
    @SoulButterflyXo 16 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Two of my friends passed away this way 😢 they were only teenagers, 12 years later I’m still processing it. RIP Taylor & Vicky 👼 👼 ✝️

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  16 วันที่ผ่านมา

      ah so sorry to hear that. I hope they found their peace as you as well.

  • @darrenjamesburnside
    @darrenjamesburnside 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    If anyone needs someone to talk to or be a friend, I'm right here. I care about you if you feel no one does.

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      hopefully people respond. 95% of the people that view this video is actually people that search up suicide according to analytics on this video, far out reaching recommended pages.

  • @Materialgirl_3
    @Materialgirl_3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I can’t seem to think about my family. There are things that I cannot take nor deal with much longer. It’s stuff that is out of my control and stuff that stays in the back of my mind. This is the worst it’s been by far

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  หลายเดือนก่อน

      sorry about the late comment. I hope today you are in better spirits. Life can get tough for the lot of us, some more than others. I hope whatever you are going through, you can find a way to get through this. About 1000 people view this post and very few reach out so its a good thing you did, perhaps other people who do see this comment will realize that they aren't the only ones that are out there struggling. I hope you come to a place where you can look back upon and say I am glad I got through this, and I made it to another day. In that state of mind where you aren't it makes life unbearable to live but if you try to keep finding ways to strive forward via therapist, med change, or psychiatrist, or new people to reach out to, even a hospitalization, anything that could keep the ball rolling is better than sitting there and being uncomplacent. Its hard when your down you don't want to do anything but I encourage you to try and get yourself out there. Cheers.

  • @chuahping9299
    @chuahping9299 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Antipsychotic made me feel depressed. When I stopped taking it, I was so much happier.

  • @Jello-Biafra69
    @Jello-Biafra69 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thanks for this

  • @andrewamani
    @andrewamani 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    It hurts so bad but i don't want to hurt my family and give them more pain. I don't think im strong enough for this life

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      its so hard especially when you are at the moment of wanting to take your own life... but yeah, i was pretty much like that yesterday, but often after a long day, and in spite knowing, I do have passing thoughts of the loved ones, especially my twin brother, but sometimes i think of chester bennington of linkin park, and of course chris cornell... ideally i dont want that to be me... however, i feel there are other methods that are less harmful including self injoursy behavior alchohol drugs, and I turn to music, i turn to my hobbies, things to keep me busy, and of course if it dont work, just trying to find a place in my bed to rest my head to curbe these thoughts, cause i know the next day it isn't so bad. Having a pet to get close to helps, and ideally having family or friends that you really care about, and if not now is the time to start soul searching. cause once you find it, its gonna be much harder to end your life.

    • @andrewamani
      @andrewamani 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@BeyondBipolarBlog I want you to know you matter so much. Even to people you haven't met. I hope you do find peace in your mind. We're going to be okay eventually and it will all be worth it

    • @danika6192
      @danika6192 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hey idk what you are going thru but the Lord Jesus really saves, i was in the same place as you but the love of Jesus really saved me. You are never alone Jesus is always with you and he loves and cares for you. Once you let the Lord into your life you will always feel happy, pleasant and content you will honestly never feel sad again because you know the Lord is on his throne and he loves you and everything is gonna be okay. May God bless you and take care of you. I love you, you can do all things thru the LORD who strengthens you. YOUVE GOT THIS AND YOU MATTER!!

  • @casuals.3.19
    @casuals.3.19 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I was doing fine after a suicide attempt I had fits of depression and all but yesterday something just changed back to the way it was before. It felt honestly like I was masking it all but in the end this entire time where I was okay I was just lying. Everything I did was a mask and I hadn’t changed it’s pretty dark honestly. Honestly I’m once again at the weird stage where I’m planning my suicides but never do I go through with them. This will build up to actually committing suicide again but this time it’ll probably be more lethal.

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      if it gets that bad time to get to a hospital and hopefully down the line properly medicated. This post is a little old so I hope you found ways to resolve your pain. Gettin a psychiatrist is really difficult in some areas and most important trying to find the right one is even harder as well as finding the right medications. I hope you find a way to heal in life.

    • @danika6192
      @danika6192 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hey idk what you are going thru but the Lord Jesus really saves, i was in the same place as you but the love of Jesus really saved me. You are never alone Jesus is always with you and he loves and cares for you. Once you let the Lord into your life you will always feel happy, pleasant and content you will honestly never feel sad again because you know the Lord is on his throne and he loves you and everything is gonna be okay. May God bless you and take care of you. I love you

  • @northlanedarko771
    @northlanedarko771 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    It sucks cause everyone will tell you ...support . Souround your self woth support and loved ones get out and make your mind distracted .
    Think about the loved ones and how hurt they'll be .
    But what if you're the guy that you hear about on the news that your body was discovered 3 months later by the smell and some stranger smelt it walking past
    I am completely alone .

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  ปีที่แล้ว

      so sorry for that... honestly its hard to want to open up to people and the way to do it sadly is social media, many bipolar groups and some chats exist in irc. I spend more time on facebook, but this can also include social circle besides close family members, perhpas you could be friend someone my accident who knows. doesnt hur to try.

    • @snoopy1390
      @snoopy1390 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      You are not alone friend.💙🩵 I hope this message finds you doing alright currently, but please know that no matter how you may think we are strangers, YOU MATTER and are in people's prayers, my prayers tonight dear friend. God is bigger than it all, there is no depth that we can sink to that He cannot reach us and pull us back up.

    • @jessicam9021
      @jessicam9021 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Bro get a cat they are pure heart creatures ❤and you are not alone we are here if you wanna talk

  • @karellt2355
    @karellt2355 2 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    There was NO ONE good 2 me. Mostly family screwed me. Ok, a few good people but most in my life didn't give a FUCK about me.

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  2 วันที่ผ่านมา

      hang in there, always count your blessing and the few that do matter, the more you focus on those that don't the more bitter you get. Its hard to get over it but everyones gotta start somewhere even if its from scratch. Hopefully you do come to terms and find ways to explore other ways to expand your network of friends. Good luck.

  • @fortniteobadietsch
    @fortniteobadietsch 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    My friend hung himself this weekend and i watched this video to kind of see what he maybe went through

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ah so sorry to hear that, i hope you are coping with it. Everyone has different reason to why they do it, but it is never your fault for what has happened so in spite all concern i hope you are dealing with it okay. Have a good day.

    • @olwethuzuma544
      @olwethuzuma544 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      My best friend hung herself too end of December. It hurts more everyday knowing she's gone forever. I keep watching videos about death through hanging to understand what she might've felt in her last moments. I feel like a failure, and I just want to treasure everyone next to me. I want to go back to that last message she sent me and tell her that she matters. I cannot believe in her last moments she went through so much pain, I know she must've felt regret while going through the excruciating pain, and still, I wasn't there to give her ground so she can breathe and continue living.

  • @keivanhamidi
    @keivanhamidi หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I can tell you that in my life people won’t even realize that I’m dead, actually NO ONE will be sad (in fact it might be the opposite)

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  หลายเดือนก่อน

      I am so sorry to hear that that is how you feel. Cause when you feel that way you seem that the world is about to end and no one cares about you which is why its so important to get yourself into society and integrate whether it is a job volunteering, support groups, therapy to a psychiatrist doing anything possible to maybe benefit yourself. Id start with a journal to list goals so you have an idea with what you want to accomplish, cause that at first can give you a head start on where you should go from a state that is in no shape go for anyone. Cause once you start making progress you will never want to go backwards. Medications can do wonders if you find the right one and transcranial magnetic stimulation helped me and i am no longer on an antidepressant. You aren't alone and I am sure people struggle like you. But you have to try to get a mindset in which you can at least try to alter your state of mind cause once you try that things do get easier on you.

  • @martyjay1981
    @martyjay1981 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    What did it feel like?

  • @davidcapps5438
    @davidcapps5438 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    you have a very nice home. more than I have

  • @user-yh6ds3kf6v
    @user-yh6ds3kf6v หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    If you’re reading this I’m already dead, don’t ever try to commit suicide by hanging yourself. It hurts as much as you can think, your body starts to have an ache and your head starts to feel like exploding. please don’t experience what I did to my self please. Take care and love yourself and others ❤

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  หลายเดือนก่อน

      Late response, but hope you doing okay. Don't want you to already be dead. I am sure if you find a community, you will find people that cares about you. Find people that make a difference in your life and you can make one in theirs. Your life may change for the better. Cheers.

    • @erinhernandez5087
      @erinhernandez5087 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Please don’t kill yourself! There are people who want to help you! My son hung himself 18 days ago. I found him in our home and gave him CPR until EMS arrived. It took another 48 hours for them to be able to run test and see if there was any brain activity. Unfortunately there wasn’t; he was dead to long. Please, please don’t do this!

  • @amihodges4899
    @amihodges4899 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      welcome hope you are having a good day, good month, and good year and many to come.

  • @Goatnime
    @Goatnime ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This disease has taken my most important relationship from me, and has led me to several addictions that are so bad I couldn't even talk to a therapist about them without having to suffer some sort of consequence. this is the most painful possible life I could imagine.

    • @JoshJosh-ht6rq
      @JoshJosh-ht6rq 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Which diseases

    • @jessicam9021
      @jessicam9021 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@JoshJosh-ht6rqmental disease

    • @danika6192
      @danika6192 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hey idk what you are going thru but the Lord Jesus really saves, i was in the same place as you but the love of Jesus really saved me. You are never alone Jesus is always with you and he loves and cares for you. Once you let the Lord into your life you will always feel happy, pleasant and content you will honestly never feel sad again because you know the Lord is on his throne and he loves you and everything is gonna be okay. May God bless you and take care of you. I love you

  • @goodmiller4786
    @goodmiller4786 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    My nephew hang his self in jail and don't why he hang self

  • @apollyon9946
    @apollyon9946 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    My whole life has been like this. I've had 5 hospitializations and 4 or 5 PHP idk I lost count. Same with meds, been on everyrhing. I tried twice before to die. Overdosed on meds and then later hanging. I am only alive for others. That's it. I am trying to make it till my parents die. But it might still be too long from now. I often wish I was an orphan so no one would miss me. Worst part is no one really cared when I made my noose the first time and tied it up and everything. They thought i was faking. It hurts so much. Second time they listened because I actually hurt myself a bit. But off to a hosiptal and I come home they act the same. Like I don't matter. Most of the time I think they deserve to feel the pain. I am so angry towards people that keep me imprisoned for their own happiness, but offer me no relief.

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      i am sorry you are having a tough time. To be honest I have had bipolar for 15 years now and 8 hospitalizations. My 20s were not terribly good. But after some time things do get better (at least having that mindset can hopefully help you feel a little better about the outlook in life). For me it sucks to reach out beyond my extended family but I know for a fact that it can be very difficult if you feel you are not wanted. I think the misunderstanding can make things worse and can increase anxiety. I hope you find what you need to get better and live a happier life. I honestly am not a miracle worker but I do appreciate you watching this video. I hope it gives some closure for the experiences of feeling alone. Cheers.

    • @danika6192
      @danika6192 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hey idk what you are going thru but the Lord Jesus really saves, i was in the same place as you but the love of Jesus really saved me. You are never alone Jesus is always with you and he loves and cares for you. Once you let the Lord into your life you will always feel happy, pleasant and content you will honestly never feel sad again because you know the Lord is on his throne and he loves you and everything is gonna be okay. May God bless you and take care of you. I love you

  • @moneytips-smartgenuinequit300
    @moneytips-smartgenuinequit300 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Did you leave a note?

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  ปีที่แล้ว

      nah i was sorta thinking in the moment at the time

  • @dimitrijpospelov5269
    @dimitrijpospelov5269 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    i am not a quitter

  • @gkeralnttsoulai6499
    @gkeralnttsoulai6499 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I have nothing to look forward to. Everyone lied and played with me

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      hang in there... it sound stupid and redundant and I am pretty sure you don't feel that way but if you get some rest and try to reach out, get some help, things will get easier. Don't wait. I have done that and I could of saved my self a lot more time if I just got help much earlier.

  • @lewisariki7193
    @lewisariki7193 8 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I know that so many ppl who would celebrate my death. My mother is number 1. My oldest son also fighting for first position then my brothers would laugh themselves silly with joy. Fuck all ppl would either care or notice!

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  7 วันที่ผ่านมา

      i feel you, I hope you come to terms with your pain. Cause if you don't you are going to fight an uphill battle. It makes life much harder when your own family doesn't support you. However, you gotta do your damnedest to think positively. Its going to be challenging and you will always revert to negative thought patterns, I do the same, cause it is so easy to do, but if you consistently do that, its going ot make life that much more miserable. Try hard to not blame yourself or anyone else, but move and push forward, live a good life and do your best to set goals, life productively and have a reasonable set of faith. Good luck.

  • @cassiedege
    @cassiedege 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Unfortunately you are definitely not welcome into the Athletics Australia community if you are living with depression anxiety or any other mental health issues

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      stigma is everywhere but with the right crowd people are willing to be open minded in some cases. i hope you find that somewhere so you can find peace in your life.

  • @trypticon31
    @trypticon31 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I have physical pain with not able to sleep my family don’t care and I don’t have friends.

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      ah i am so sorry to hear that... it could be the wrong medication that may be inducing that or not enough or even the wrong one.

    • @danika6192
      @danika6192 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hey idk what you are going thru but the Lord Jesus really saves, i was in the same place as you but the love of Jesus really saved me. You are never alone Jesus is always with you and he loves and cares for you. Once you let the Lord into your life you will always feel happy, pleasant and content you will honestly never feel sad again because you know the Lord is on his throne and he loves you and everything is gonna be okay. May God bless you and take care of you. I love you, you can do all things thru the LORD who strengthens you. YOUVE GOT THIS AND YOU MATTER!!

  • @hadezmage
    @hadezmage 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I’m too fat the rope would break 😭

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      try to stay alive for the sake of people that care for you. and if not, you may not have any, people can care for you if you just reach out and find a network of people that may be in a similar situation as yourself. Get some sleep, get some help, find friends, don't wait to long cause the longer you wait the harder it is to bounce back, you can save yourself so much heartache if you just start making small decisions right now. Take care.

  • @ksosharissa6726
    @ksosharissa6726 หลายเดือนก่อน

    blackpill is real
    bruutal ..

  • @user-lj9ok3xp9u
    @user-lj9ok3xp9u 10 วันที่ผ่านมา

    All i want to know is too much painfull?

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  10 วันที่ผ่านมา

      suicidal thoughts is painful especially over a period of time, it can get really irritating cause you know you want to die. But if you have faith things will get better your entire outlook will change. So my advice is do your best to think positive inspite all of the shit you go through no matter how tough it is, it could just very well save your life. Cheers.

  • @td2658
    @td2658 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I know you mean well, but I have no one. I've called hotlines and they are aholes making you feel terrible and like loser.

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I understand what you may be going through, and it can be difficult when it comes to people on hotlines which is why its more important to find good friends. and that is even difficult to find but you have to keep trying cause when you do thats when life starts giving you meaning and you have people for support. Support groups exists and group therapy, its farfetched from real friendships, but volunteering may be hard and if worse come to shove, working partime as a distraction can help, I also workout 5 days a week so getting yourself out there is extremely beneficial even if you have anxiety, doing it several times is good for a period of time. I hope you find the support you are looking for.

    • @td2658
      @td2658 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@BeyondBipolarBlog thank you for taking the time to reply it means a lot ☺️

  • @nqx
    @nqx 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    As one who has suffered depression with suicidal thoughts, I'm glad I never did it because I found out that hell is real, and those who kill themselves go there. Let's carry our cross and avoid the terrible fate of eternal destruction. Let's accept God's promise of eternal life through Jesus Christ. Once we accept Jesus Christ as Lord and savior, we carry our cross, and we do our best in a rapidly dying world. We keep looking forward to God's promise in a world without evil. Let's be a positive force for suicide prevention by telling the truth: There's no forgiveness for suicide (John 8:21-22). Don't even think about it. Peace to all, and please ask anything.

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I hope people can find hope through your message. So many people shy away from religion due to various reasons but messages of hope is good in my book. All I do ask for people is to have faith in yourself that things will get better. Sometimes putting your problems towards something higher can absolve you of the pressure that you cannot handle alone. Best wishes.
      Trav

    • @nqx
      @nqx 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@BeyondBipolarBlog Me too, but here's the reality: We're going to need more than faith in ourselves. This is not a religion, and this is not a coping skill. This is the truth. Heaven and hell are real. When we die, we're going to get the best thing imaginable or the worst. This is not just a belief. The choice is ours. I hope people find hope in God's promise of eternal life through Jesus Christ. This is the only way to avoid the terrible fate of eternal destruction. God made it easy for us to be saved.

  • @irenevassallo4491
    @irenevassallo4491 20 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I will pray for you. Try Jesus he can give you peace in a storm

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  20 วันที่ผ่านมา

      appreciate it, this is a pretty old video so I am doing much better these days.

  • @shanefrance5071
    @shanefrance5071 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    All negative thoughts come from the mind..

  • @danika6192
    @danika6192 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Hey idk what you are going thru but the Lord Jesus really saves, i was in the same place as you but the love of Jesus really saved me. You are never alone Jesus is always with you and he loves and cares for you. Once you let the Lord into your life you will always feel happy, pleasant and content you will honestly never feel sad again because you know the Lord is on his throne and he loves you and everything is gonna be okay. May God bless you and take care of you. I love you, you can do all things thru the LORD who strengthens you. YOUVE GOT THIS AND YOU MATTER!!

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Amen!

    • @lottikaro596
      @lottikaro596 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Up io polo 🇼🇸🇼🇸🇿🇲🇿🇲🇼🇸😊 oh 😧😧😧

  • @saltqui7578
    @saltqui7578 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    5g

  • @saltqui7578
    @saltqui7578 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Ah bro just go to Germany or russia

    • @birdemki774
      @birdemki774 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Why?

  • @saltqui7578
    @saltqui7578 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Stop watching naruto

  • @rohnleidigh213
    @rohnleidigh213 8 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Yada yada yada. Do it

  • @FloridaSunandSand2005
    @FloridaSunandSand2005 หลายเดือนก่อน

    What if you don’t have anyone who gives a shit? Everyone disowned me.

    • @BeyondBipolarBlog
      @BeyondBipolarBlog  หลายเดือนก่อน

      thats whats most unfortunate and thats what takes the most work. You gotta try to reach out and find people that will care about you if you don't have any. If not, find people that would benefit you in your support network, a therapist, a psychiatrist, someone that you meet where you volunteer at, a session at a group therapy, a psychiatrist, a personal therapist, anyone that could help benefit your mental, it is no way to replace a relationship or friends but it is a start, maybe down the line they will have a someone in their friends connection that is a good fit for you. Never give up and keep trying. I hope you can find people that really care for you. Take care. Trav