WHAT HAPPENS AT A JEWISH FUNERAL? Talking with my Rabbi
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ต.ค. 2020
- In today's video I'm talking with Rabbi Mitchell Berkowitz about what you can expect if you're attending a Jewish funeral or going to a house where the family is sitting Shiva. He shares with me what to say to Jewish mourners, what the funeral and cemetery look like and what happens there and then we talk a little bit about the Jewish spiritual philosophy about what happens when we die. Thank you so much to Rabbi Berkowitz of B'nai Israel Congregation for your help on this video!
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I swear, all Rabbi's I've come across have the nicest, most honest eyes ever. Yours is no different!! Tell him we say thank you for him doing this.
Lol I agree, it must be all the wisdom they have along with that they spend their days helping people!
@@MyJewishMommyLife completely agree!!!
Beautiful tradition. I love that everything has such meaning, respect, and thought. Thank you for sharing with those of us with different traditions. We are one in heart. I love these rituals! (Rabbi is so right about what not to say!)
I can certainly relate to my grandmother’s and mother’s passing. Both involved having women present with them at all times until the funeral. These women not only prayed, but washed and dressed them. Your Rabbi is a nice guy. Marion, congrats on 30K!
I can’t imagine performing such a role but I think those people are doing the most selfless act for sure. I’m sorry for your losses and thank you so much 🙏
Great presentation as always. I was 10 years old when my father’s aunt passed away and my parents took me to her funeral to pay respect for our family’s loss. I learned to appreciate our traditions.
Marion, I’ve been to that synagogue for the happy occasion of a couple of
bat mitzvahs.
That’s beautiful 🙏 thank you so much for sharing!
My father in law is also a Rabbi here, thanks for a wonderful content you shared. 😘❤️
Thank you for this I am not Jewish. I just lost a WONDERFUL Jewish friend and appreciate the time you took to create this video. ❤️ as I am attending the last day of Shiva at their home tomorrow. I heard not to speak unless spoken too.
I'm agnostic but I love all Jewish traditions...so incredibly beautiful and wise
And thanks so much for the work that you put into all of your videos!
Lovely and sensitive. Thank-you very much. Well presented.
Thank you so much for your kind words 🙏
Thank you so much for this, I love all of your videos but think these have been so beautifully explained, that I find it comforting in a way. I'm not Jewish but I connect so deeply with your faith and am considering conversion so I am learning as much as I can. 🥰🙏❤️
That is so nice to hear, I'm glad these videos have resonated for you in that way!
This was extremely interesting, I would love to know more about it!
I was raised Catholic but my family (just from my mother's side) used to be Jewish. For this reason we still have a family tomb at the Jewish cemetery in my hometown, which we usually visit once a year to read some psalms and to place some stones on it. Unfortunately, we know very little about Jewish customs, especially concerning this topic; I truly hope that me and my family didn't do anything disrespectful so far.
I'm sure not, it sounds like you are doing everything with respect and love in your heart and I'm sure that that is what matters most!
@@TheMassimorai For example when the AncestryDNA comes back 3% Ashkenazy Jewish , then you are Jewish? even though you’ve been baptized Catholic your whole life?
If your mother is Jew you are Jew, in Judaism the religion is given by the mother
meaning if your grandmother was Jew that mean your mother is Jew and therefore you are Jew also
I see that you all are jews. As a jew you have father/ grandfather jew than you jew by the Israel country law, jew. If your mother/grandmother jew you are jew by the law and by the religious law.
You don't have to believe or practic anything.
As a jew you can get help and gaid by rabbi that can run the process for you.
Your rabbi has a very calm voice to listen to. This video was so interesting to me as someone who is Christian, but is very interested in learning about other religions. These traditions surrounding death are really beautiful. They seem to give a lot of dignity and comfort to people while they are mourning. I hope to be able to meet more members of this faith which has so many commonalities with my own beliefs. Thanks for making this for us!
Thank you so much. I especially appreciated hearing about the custom of tearing the cloth and sitting in the low chair as well as thoughts about the soul. All of the information was very informative.
I’m so glad to hear it was interesting and appreciated 🙏
While it is different than Christian ceremonies, it's also similar.
I think all people depend on traditional rituals for comfort.
Very wise, I agree indeed!
Of course similar, all the cristiatu begun as judaism during 500 years before the empaier seaser ordered to make some changes to devide judaizm of the jews from the religion of the empaier jenties for example to move the shabbat from Saturday to Sunday - to worship the sun.(& it took 700 years to complete by force and punishments (of the inquisition) the changes because the people did not want the changes.
Thank you this was very informative 👏
Great video! Would you consider doing a video on the ins and outs of the synagogue? How to act, what the holy books are, how to behave, etc.?
I love this idea!! Yes I'll try to cover that, thank you for the idea!
SHABBAT SHALOM ,JEWISH MOM AND RABBI.. WHAT A BITTER SWEET VIDEO, BITTER THE PERSN DIED BUT SWEET THAT YOU CAN TEACH ALL ABOUT THE JEWISH FAITH FUNERALS.. TODAH..
Such an informative vlog! Love the traditions!
Thank you both for sharing. Sounds like a beautiful and very meaningful ceremony.
You are so welcome, thank you for watching!
Excellent and beautiful! Thank you!
Congratulations on 30K subscribers! Very interesting video. Gave a thumbs up, thank you!
Thank you very much!
Beautiful synagogue. Very interesting, as always Marion. 🥰
Glad you enjoyed it!
Thank you Marion. Jewish life offers so much. Nice to see you and Rabbi Mitch working on these videos together.
Thank you so much! So glad you liked this one!
this video gives me sooo much clarity, Marion. I think back to my grandpas funeral, and it all makes sense now. I wondered why we all took turns with the shovel!!
I'm so glad to hear it!!
Great Video ❤
Thank you for the video!! I had learned some of the traditions from a documentary I found on TH-cam and the folks who had a death of the matriarch actually ripped their clothes and the men didn’t shave and couldn’t celebrate holidays (the death occurred around Hanukkah) and that was enlightening. I think they were more orthodox too to go to those lengths. But to each their own. Love what you share!!!
Your Rabbi is so inspiring and you're such a wonderful lady!
Thank you for not being afraid of touching such a subject. I personally lost my mama a year ago, she was a true Tzaddika and although we're not orthodox we kept most of the traditions.
Hopefully, once Moshiach comes she will return to us.
Thank you so much! I am so sorry for your loss, may her memory be a blessing.
Excellent
Thank you and God bless you All !
And to you!
I like your Rabbi, not only is he very informative but he also seems very approachable and easy going. I've never been in a synagogue but was alway curious how the interior laid out compared to a traditional Protestant church. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for this informative presentation. I was a part of the Cheva Kadisha, and learned some things too. I enjoy all your presentations.
Wow that's amazing, what a mitzvah!!
Thank you for sharing. ☺️ God Bless this synagogue 🕍 🇮🇱 🙏🏼💕
Thank you!
Why would all congregants not be eligible for a funeral service in the synagogue? Is there a hierarchy within the community? Do rabbis ever perform graveside services for someone who had no one to bury them and say redemptive words to see them off into the next life and give some comfort to their loved ones, even though if they were not members they would not have a service in the synagogue? Does the synagogue service differ significantly from that held in a 'religiously appointed' auditorium/chapel at a Jewish mortuary prior to going to the cemetery? After the first shovelsful, we have always just picked up dirt from the grave and filed past to drop it into the grave without an implement. Is that common? Is there also any symbolism of the tear/rent in the time-space continuum we inhabit when someone passes from this world to the next through, what could be called, the portal of death? Can one say the appropriate statement about the mourners needing comfort in English, if you remember that and not the Hebrew? So true: sometimes we attend a funeral to honor the dead person whom we'd known in some manner and at other times we are there to support the family of a dead individual whom we did not know, but do know some of the family who've suffered the loss quite well. So often the way we have a sense of the presence of someone who's gone is through sensory experiences of a smell or sound or unusual sight. Is there any Jewish teaching about the connection to the dead continuing through ongoing prayers of the living and the dead or is the understanding not that the dead would pray to God, pray for us, or praise God perhaps any longer? It is never a good idea, except in the most fatalistic beliefs, for any of us to tell someone that they should be happy their loved one is out of pain or somewhere better or any of those odd constructs. We know our beloved is in a sense displaced and we are bereft of them. It is better to sit quietly with someone, hold their hand, and weep with them. Be present.
Beautiful Synagogue your Rabbi seems like an awesome guy and very interesting video
Thank you so much!!
Hello, thank you for very informative and helpful video.. Can I ask you and your Jewish followers - what food is appropriate to bring for comfort and what else except food is appropriate to bring ..?? Also I would love to know if candles and music(and what) is involved in process of funeral and following week ?
A daily food. It is not party its mourning situation the close relstives can not taking care of themselves they need people to take care of the.
Yippee 😁 you made 30k. Wonderful.
Thank you so much ☺️
So what do we do when we go in? Meaning if not to be spoken to. Are we to shake hands?
Just wanted to say thank you for enabling captions for a video where masks are worn 💕
Lol yes I also always caption my Instagram stories as most of the time I'm watching things on silent anyways!
In Judaism, I know that the custom is for the deceased person to be buried quickly. I’m wondering, is it customary for the deceased person to be embalmed? If so, is there a “kosher” method of doing this?
I’ve heard that in Israel, the bones of the deceased are collected a year later. Is this still practiced?
Thanks you both for this video. I have been to 3 Jewish funerals in Dublin, Ireland. All neighbours. All Orthodox. Dublin has only a very small Jewish Community. All funerals services were in a small Shul in the cemetery. The Rabbi lead all the prayers. Then the congregation followed the casket to the grave. The casket was just a wooden box. I am sure the prayers were similar to what the Rabbi said. After burial we went back to Shul for more prayers and announcements like what times Shiva would be sitting. Then before leaving cemetery we all washed our hands. I found it all very moving. I also understand the year of mourning or sometimes I think some people in Ireland do 6 months. Not sure. My neighbour when her Mum died she did not play music for a year. She shredded a top she was wearing and wore it for the 7 days of Shiva.
I know afterwards sometimes there is a memorial in the Synagogue. Very interesting. I really enjoy your videos and the nice family values you have.
Thank you for sharing these experiences, it’s so nice to see how traditions are held all over the world.
Marion, I just had to share this great new with you! I had my virtual Beit Din today and am now officially a member of the tribe:) I mentioned your channel to the rabbis and sent them a link. I hope they will be able to use your channel as a tool for other future converts. Jewish afterlife is something I actually talked about in my Personal Reflection essay they made me do and it's such a polarizing and interesting topic. Thanks for the video on it!
That is so awesome and Mazal Tov! Thank you so much for sharing my videos, that is so kind of you. Amazing that you've been researching the afterlife, indeed it is so interesting!
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Is it okay for me to bring baked cookies I watched all is round. I know flowers are not welcome as much as donations to charities. Rocks could you talk about the Rocks. Are they only for visiting the grave site?
I could not find this answer on google do people still bring food to a family friend even with Covid
Yes. It's rude not to
Hi beautiful lady Marion I have a question do they allow in synagogue not covering of hair when you are in?
Yup! Conservative schul so I don’t cover my hair, I actually have never covered my hair.
@@MyJewishMommyLife your hair is to beautiful to cover. Be natural and not a sub servant to mankind.👍
@@MyJewishMommyLife I understood Jewish women who are married are required to cover the natural hair, either by wigs or head covering.
As far as I know, Christians don’t find things like “they’re in a better place/God chose this/God picks his favorites to become angels” either lol.
And if I haven’t said it yet, happy 30k!!!
Lol yes it definitely can hurt to hear even if it’s meant well 💯! And thank you so much ☺️
You did not mention how the body is buiried? I know in orthodox judaism it is forbidden to buiry the body in a coffiin ,is it also like that by conservative judaism?
שלום
How long does it take to convert to Judaism?
Great job!
Why bury quickly?
Why cover mirrors? Is it because of the soul coming into the house and so they don’t see that they are dead-part of Catholic traditions? Or is it so that the mourners don’t worry about their appearance
Bury quickly out of respect for the deceased. Covering mirrors is for the mourners so they can be focused on mourning and not their appearance
Thank you 🙏 yes that’s right bury quickly so the soul can rest and cover mirrors so mourners are less distracted.
Congrats on 30k!😁
Thank you so much for your support 🙏
Congratulations on the target you have reached as a channel👏👏👏👍👍👍🌹🌹🌹🎊🎉🎆🎈🤗♥🤗
You've worked so hard, and your dedication to your subscribers is wonderful, and most appreciated.😊💐
Thank you for all you do.
Shalom to you, and your wonderful family always.🤗🌺🌸🌼
Moira
From England.
@@contact3604 Aww thank you so much Moira!! I really appreciate all the support and encouragement along the way, it means so much to me!
@@MyJewishMommyLife
Your most welcome!
Moira 😊🤗
What about autopsy?
No autopsy unless mandated for crime purposes. No organ donation either
So it sounds like the soul goes to a place that makes it closer to God. Can this be considered Heaven? If not what is the name?
I thought Rabbi's couldn't have contact with the dead, or visit a graveyard. Am I wrong?
It is a pious custom for those who are Kohanim ("priests" who trace their lineage to Aaron the High Priest) to avoid contact with the dead. But not all rabbis are Kohanim, and not all Kohanim are rabbis.
@@mitchellberkowitz1865 All priests are Levites but not all Levites are priests.
Do Jewish people get cremated ever?
Really interesting video but wow, so many adverts!!
Sorry about that it’s just how TH-cam automatically does it but I’ll look into if there have been any changes!
What the heck kind of synagogue brings a dead body into the synagogue!?
Very enlightening, thank you...I have to say though, I was extremely surprised to hear that there are Jews who believe in reincarnation! I didn’t think that was part of an Abrahamic faith tradition..
Think about that today if the we can get alive cell with dna of any/male that dead 1000 years ago we can give him life again. Think about it...
Death is inevitable. It is the one thing that we can be certain about in life. We are born to die. Every soul shall have a taste of death no matter who they are. This is confirmed for us many times in the Quran:
“Every soul shall have a taste of death: and We test you by evil and by good, by way of trial. To Us must you return.” (21:35)
“Every soul shall have a taste of death: In the end to Us shall you be brought back.” (29:57)
The Jewish train of thought is very in line with my own personal beliefs. But I do tend to believe in reincarnation. Well, the strong likelihood of it. There is a whole unknown and uncertain, but I feel like I have been here before.
It psychology/spiritual Metter not religion & not in judaism
Actually the alternative is to wish the mourner "LONG LIFE", but this might not be an American thing
I’ve heard this too but my family
is South African so that may be why!
Are you guys conservative?
yes they are ;)
Yup!
@@MyJewishMommyLife Do you believe in Yeshua?
I just want to push back very gently and say that having a dead body in the synagogue is not in line with Jewish tradition, and that no one should take these videos as how to for how most Conservative Jewish people/ communities operate traditionally.
Definitely some synagogues where you won't see it and some where you will for sure!
I wondered about that too. Where does the body go in Conservative Judaism?
You can't put body in the synagogue because the Cohens &the Levi's forbiden be close to corps/unpure/ cemetery