Timestamps 1). Sex and attachment 0:31 2). Caring about each others needs 1:55 3). Is there (literally) romantic chemistry 3:07 4). Do you feel the same after sex 4:13 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
To engage in sexual contact of any kind with your partner means that you now see them as someone whom you're able to do more exploring with than anyone else you've ever had in your life. If it's with someone that doesn't have your best interest, it can get dangerous really quickly. However, if your partner genuinely cares about you with or without sex or intimacy, and wants you specifically to be happy with your life, regardless of what you choose to do, that's a sign that you are with someone that has your back, possibly forever, and that engaging in sexual or intimate activities with them will be because of their intense desire to connect with you even more deeply. Hopefully what I'm saying makes any sense. :)
I guess I just keep sending mixed messages if I ask about them having a boyfriend or not huh? Maybe it’s more important to show interest rather than tell cause… I won’t always know who exactly I’m interested in unless they decide to show some interest in me beforehand & whether I… feel like showing some of my interest in turn.
@@themidnightotaku22 It depends on who you're talking to, but I don't see asking about previous relationships as a negative thing so long as it doesn't dominate most conversations.
which is why i am afraid of going that route of having s*x with my partner. we may be still fresh in our relationship (4 months) and had some wild things in bed, but not the main dish. i have the desire, ofc i have if i am attracted to her, but its not this feeling of wanting it so deeply. we cuddle, we cook, we eat, we watch, we sleep together but the thought of "losing" interest for a short time after getting relief is killing me. hope it wont be like that
My partner and I truly love each other. We felt a deep connection with each other. He only cares about making sure he had a connection with my mind and heart. He’s respectful and understanding. Sometimes I just want cuddles or I’m dealing with a lot. I love doing stupid mundane stuff with him like running errands because we’re spending time together. Even if we’re doing our own thing at home, he appreciates that I still interact with him from time to time. Sounds simple, but I love holding hands with him. My ex didn’t do that a lot. There’s also a lot of stuff that my fiancé considers normal in a relationship that’s new to me like cuddles. Oh how I love cuddles
I really love this video. It expresses the feelings of romantic people who love the idea of sex with their partner but hate the idea of sex being the center or the main part of the relationship. I've seen so many people in comments sections trying to explain this mindset and they get absolutely flamed for it, saying their relationship is doomed to fail or the "man must be so miserable" and so on so forth. It's incredibly sad to see how people don't understand this, especially the adults of this generation. Sex is a great, emotional, bonding, connecting thing to share in reference to the long term relationship built on love and affection; but, it's just one aspect. I love having a relationship where every aspect is prioritized and participated in equally, like affection, romance, innocence, playfulness, things seperate from sex that just make the idea and the action much more comfortable and welcome and wanted when it does come around. It's lovely.
@@discoskull it's always great to finally find some mental clarity after figuring out how you feel about something emotionally impactful such as this! (:
I disagree with everything having the same priority, you need to understand what you and your partner need. Not understanding that can lead to many conflicts
I have a question. How do males and females bond with each other? I don't see how men and women can bond (especially romantically) with each other. Men and women think very differently from each other. It seems like it's impossible for men and women to emotionally connect with each other. I heard that gay and lesbian couples are happier than straight couples are, and I heard that gay and lesbian relationships are healthier than straight relationships are. The more similar you are to someone, the more easier it is to bond and connect with them. People of the same sex/gender understand each other more easily, and there are no inbuilt societal power imbalances as there are between opposite-sex couples. Gay and lesbian couples understand each other better than straight couples do (due to them being the same gender as each other). I heard that most straight couples are not happy being together, and I heard that people who are straight are much happier and much better off being single than they are being in a romantic relationship.
@@icysnow57cold64 first of all, thank you for your thoughtful comment and genuine question. The answer is, and I'm sorry to disappoint, there really isn't a single straight answer. I've heard a lot of the same things too, and you are right in your statement that at least on the surface, it's much easier to bond and connect with people who are similar to us, and that makes heterosexual relationships inherently hard. This is something I think about a lot actually, but the reality is it's all based on the individual. I don't believe it's down to sex differences, I believe it's down to the way society upbrings men and women and the contrasts it creates in the way they hold themselves, the way they think, approach things, what they value, etc. Without so much internet influence, heterosexual relationships are actually much better than they seem! I've found this out through my own relationship, when we had less outside influence and external guidance that was totally biased towards gender specific things and goals and etc, we were happier and grew closer together. We bond through shared experience, through communication and vulnerability, telling ourselves about one another and discovering new things about each other regularly, which is something that even years down the line is always possible. The ways we live, opinions we form, views we have, all eventually end up coming closer together and lining up because we are each other's biggest influence, goal, and priority. We want to think the same and have the same values, so the more we seek to understand one another through everyday openness, conversation, understanding, etc, the closer we actually come to that. Every individual will be different about this though. You can't guarantee someone wants the same things or sees relationships the same way that you do or values the same things to the same extents. That is what makes relationships hard just in general, but maybe it's where same sex versus opposite sex relationships differ in that one is easier than the other.. at least possibly. But, how people bond and connect is completely individual based.. and while gender can have an influence on that, I really believe it's beyond gender and more down to the person and who they are themselves. A lot of men (in my opinion) overvalue sex and undervalue the emotional, friendship side of relationships with women and women vice versa. Balance is much harder to find in these circumstances than same sex relationships; but it isn't always the case. All relationships when balanced (not just between sex and emotional value, but other things as well.. those are just the foundational aspects) are amazing, and bonding happens in relatively similar ways, it's just that possibly in same sex relationships, engaging in bonding activities (other than intercourse) are easier, more natural, and of higher priority more often than in opposite sex relationships and I can't really answer why that is. But it again all happens in similar ways. Sharing experiences, talking, communicating, having inside jokes, making things intimate and personal, consistency and building rituals, having fun by doing whatever you find fun personally and working to make ends meet. Even arguments can be bonding if they're done in healthy ways. Of course healthy physical intimacy, such as intercourse but other physical things like kissing, cuddling, hugging, are all big ways to bond as well. It's a lot of things and ways to bond get very individualistic and personal so, as sorry as I am for the monologue, it's really that simple 😂
This helped me realize that I DO have romantic feelings for the one I'm seeing. I don't just see them as a friend who I'm attracted to. I was always so worried about my mind being in the gutter, but even if we never kiss I'll still be happy with the relationship
0:00 intro 0:31 1. Sex and attachment 1:55 2. Caring about each others needs 3:06 3. Is there (literally) romantic chemistry 4:12 4. Do you feel the same after sex 5:15 conclusion 5:37 outro
This made me realize that I want to be more romantic towards my partner. I'm in love, my way of expression is very physical but hers is different, more words of affirmation and acts of love and I want to do that more now. Thank you
Sexual chemistry does definitely exist. It's possible for people to have an extremely intense physical connection. Probably the most tangible indicator of this is if a partner smells amazing. I think a guide to whether you want them is if you've had a passionate and physical night, you still eagerly look forward to their messages the next morning as soon as you're apart. To be physically satisfied, but still want them is important.
I just had a heartbreak 2 weeks ago with a girl that I’ve had a crush on for 3 years, and then I started watching your videos, I managed to find the definition of love and redefined myself. I just wanna say a big thank you!❤
Thank you so much for sharing something so personal with us. We wanted to ask, how are you doing now? Which videos do you think were helpful for you in defining love and redefining yourself?
I’m going through a heartbreak too. So, I feel you on that. The last time we had sex, they were very distant and aloof afterwards, but in the beginning they weren’t like that. I have to accept that they no longer want me and only desire me when s e x is involved. I know that they once loved me and I do still think that they love me. But, they just don’t want me anymore. They just want s e x. For me it was love making, but for them it wasn’t, even though I still loved me. It’ confusing, but I think that’s where we both stand. I just have to accept that I’ll never be with them again.
@@Psych2go Thanks for asking, I’m doing every time better now, and via your contents, I found out that I’m an introvert type of person even though I don’t believe it . I learned what makes introverts attractive and how to relate with them too. Also, I stopped chasing for everybody and took a little break thinking about what are the characteristics I want in a partner? And also what this video says: Do I still feel attracted by the other half after s*x? It really helped me a lot!
I've been watching this channel for years and I'd like to thank you guys for bring things up like gaslighting something my folks have done to me all my life... and so I love this so much
Clear your mind and cite one good thing in your life. Something you are grateful for. Something you are proud of. Something that makes you smile. Breathe in as you think of it.
I had a loving desire towards another woman a few times, but no matter what I did to win her love in return she never had any loving desire towards me but for someone else. They say if you love and respect her, let her go. If she comes back, you two are meant for each other. If she never comes back, it was never meant to be. This is why I'm still single.
@@Psych2go I think attachment could be a fear of being alone or many other things. Love would be when you know the person is right for you. In other words attachment can be a one sided relationship
Yeaaaaah my ex was definitely just sexually attached to me Almost every time after we had sex he wanted to walk away or go do something by himself or turn off the lights. He was almost always rough and made me do things that didnt pleasure me and a lotta times hurt me. He always guilted me into doing rougher stuff because it was more “passionate” He also never wanted to do anything away from the house with just me and him. He always had to invite his friends to literally everything. What confuses me is that he didnt want to have sex very often. I think he had a porn addiction that he just never talked about even when I asked him. But it always made me feel not good enough. I genuinely learned to love him, and every time I had an issue in our relationship he would get angry and just turn off when I would try to fix it. And I never brought up an issue harshly or without grace. Maybe once. But regardless thank you for your help and guidance in this video
Sorry he treated you like that love. You didn’t deserve that and I’m glad he’s your ex. Don’t beat yourself up for the past. You’ll know better for the future. YOUR pleasure is important!!
I do not usually comment in videos but I am going to do it this time in sake of my inner thoughts. I believe I have acquired a great understanding on what is love and what does it convey in the real world (by books, videos, and taoist teachings and most importantly personal experiences). "Romantic" love does not exist. What exists is an agreement of two people to build a relationship. This video is based off on the fact that people are getting confused between "love"? and "sexual chemistry"? Love is a verb and it is infinite in that sense, so yes you can actually portray love (or not) to someone or "love someone" even if it is just a SEXUAL relationship. Very hard to understand since wellbeing of this culture is very much based around three words "i love you". Second of all, healthy and real relationships are composed of two things: love and eroticism. If is only love we are experiencing with someone, it is safe to say they are a friend, a colleague, a co worker, etc.. Now, if it is just eroticism we are experiencing with someone, then it is safe to say they are great partners in bed. This can be worked, of course, when two adults come and agree on forming a real relationship. It was pretty interesting to me when the animation came out of the two figures after sex sleeping. Let me tell you, if that is the case in a real relationship, then it is better to go to sexuality therapy or as a matter of fact read, watch, listen and experience on what sexuality really means because you cannot base the outcome of a relationship if they are hugging each other or not after sex- especially because the majority of people think that sexuality are two things: sex and orgasm. In conclusion, redefinition on our understanding of sexuality and real relationships (not "romantic"-disney movies etc type of thing) is definitely going to remove any over explanation and over identification on things that at the end of the day are very simple to understand....
Thank you for being positive in this video about people who have relationships that are primarily about sex and not making it all about love, because not every relationship will be about love both partners, and sometimes yes, one is in the anxious, avoidant trap, sex may be used to appease the other person by the more avoidant partner, but there may be love from the more anxious partner
I'm currently working on a love story between two unlikely characters that I previously had never put into a romantic relationship beforehand, so this video came at a solid time. :)
@@Psych2go Yeah sure! I already have a concept sketch of the two characters, but the story itself will take more time. Hopefully I can get started on it in the future. :)
In other words, this describes lust vs. love. Giving into lust is basically allowing ourselves to be led around by our libido like a wild animal. We have to keep that lust under control, because that is how we hurt others and hurt ourselves, and prevent ourselves from finding a true connection.
@@Psych2go Lust is pure sexual desire without love or true interest. The best way to distinguish between the two is to hold off on sex. Sexual desire is temporary and doesn't need to be satisfied immediately. That desire goes away and comes back. If you have the discipline to hold off and let the temporary desire go away, that'll help you see clearly and understand what you are feeling. That's the only healthy way to distinguish between the two. Love or even just a true romantic interest in a person is lasting and doesn't go away along with the sexual desire. A toxic way to know is to have sex with that person, and you'll know if an actual interest remains, but the potential damage has already happened by that point. You mentioned this method at 4:28. Another toxic way is to masterbate. This gets rid of the sexual desire immediately, and you'll know, but then the masterbation becomes like a drug to quell the sexual desire. It could become addicting which is like an abuse of orgasms, and you could become addicted to the thought of that person to get the fix.
@@Psych2go Its easy, Loving someone means you put them first before yourself, its selfless. Lusting for someone means you only want to use them, its selfish.
@@RockyAliTyson1 but that's not true. You can lust after someone withlist not using someone. Lusting is only having strong sexual desire for someone or a strong desire for something. It doesn't mean when you lust after someone you want to use them. You can also care for them just as much. After all you can't really not lust after someone you love unless you have no sexual desire to begin with. There are different kinds of love. Although even if you just lust after someone like i said doesn't mean you automatically want to use them.
I feel like this channel is stalking me. Last few vids are SPOT ON in terms of what information Im searching for currently. Absolutely perfect. Thank you!
Everyone around me always talked about sexual chemistry and I thought I was weird, because that's not how I feel about my partner when I watch them regularly. I just get mesmerized by every particular on their face, I didn't knows it was romantic chemistry 😅😅
I wish I understood this 10 or 20 years ago. "Is this love?" "No, it's sexual chemistry". I probably would have still taken that road, but I likely wouldn't have tried to turn it into more than what it was.
I'd like to point out some things related to relationships with any strain where BDSM has a significant presence. BDSM (pain and/or restraint play) of course isn't depraved by its nature as it has a reputation for being to some, but that said, couples who partake in it can benefit from bonding over discussing their proclivities toward bondage! There are three main sources of those inclinations: The one that's the first assumption for a lot of people is that enjoyment from it can be the result of trauma from past sexual assault, where the victim was forced to pretend to themselves or their attacker that they enjoyed what was happening, and that developed into a coping mechanism which just persisted into their standard relationships, but there are two more (and then some) still not very positive, but not always outright negative sources of those inclinations too. In a serious relationship, accepting your partner's interest in the practices of bondage doesn't have to be problematic for benefit to be had from discussing what about its appeal is its nature and origin for each person. Thinking about what it means to you, and/or means to them, can be profoundly helpful to better understanding your relationship with yourself and with your partner in a way that can have uses even outside of the bedroom. That style of sexuality always has a reason/origin (Are you a Scorpio? :}) and if you don't know it, it can be fun and insightful to consider. It can also sometimes help diagnose core issues in a relationship which are seemingly unrelated also, though. The two remaining primary origins are --- 1.) it can stem from the subconscious (and rarely, the conscious) desire to use it as a source of 'fuel' toward one's will to live, which doesn't necessarily mean that it staves off peoples' minds falling into suicidal territory, though in extreme cases, it can. It just means that it's the equivalent of thrill seeking for some more indoorsy types, and stimulates the body and mind into experiencing some, or many, symptoms of the fight or flight response, making the conclusion of each session psychologically rewarding to its participants. Low self-esteem or otherwise a person's lack of making a habit of setting short-term, easily-achievable, trackable goals for themselves (basically, the chronic lack of stimulation to the reward centers of the brain) can definitely contribute to making bondage, and particularly the elements of breath play and roleplay specifically involving power play (the sub playing willful/hard to get). The latter being a preferential thematic to someone might be indicative of trauma, perhaps even unrealized trauma, in their lives regarding them having, or at one time having had, a feeling of powerlessness over certain elements of their lives. Which leads to 2.)--- ---2.) It can also stem from a person's intense focus on principals regarding their rights of self-expression, which may or may not be a focus for them based on their personal experience in feeling that what makes them, *them*, has been disrespected at times. It's not to say that BDSM is any more common in, for instance, homosexual relationships, but it *is* to say that homosexuals are less likely to view BDSM as being fundamentally in the interest of depraved individuals, because when BDSM behaviors being associated in a person's mind with their rights of self-expression and personal freedoms are determined to potentially be the actual cause of their interest in it, it can sometimes then be said to stem from that person experiencing it as a kind of rebellion against conformity---a private sort of activism that they can share with others who are likeminded. Which isn't a bad thing at all! An example of problems in relationships which might not seem to be related to BDSM being a part of a couple's bonding behaviors though, but that knowing their origins may be able to help in troubleshooting, is when one partner makes it their personal goal to help the other be more open in the bedroom because they feel like that's what their partner wants (and often, that partner will have said as much), I've seen it happen more than once that the more open person in the relationship can begin to feel that the more reserved person is judging their 'wild side' as being deplorably depraved, or being symbolic of some negative trait about them that they in any case refuse to admit to feeling about them, simply because the boundaries that that person sets for either themselves, or their partner, or both, are. In other words, obviously a successful BDSM relationship is founded on mutual trust and respect and the knowing of each others' boundaries and practicing them, but sometimes the nature of those boundaries either being crossed, or being something that one of the participants would prefer that the other allow to be crossed isn't as much a matter of them being fundamentally disrespectful people as it might initially seem. Sometimes people into the lifestyle don't even realize that they view others declining to partake in their more extreme preferences as them saying, without actually saying, that they find certain interests of theirs to be repulsive. When that's the case, it doesn't mean the relationship is doomed because it's going to rely on the partner accepting their more enthusiastically wild companion's preferences or it's a deal breaker. It just might *seem* that way, if one partner feels that the other is refusing to be open and honest because they're saying "I'm not into that", while they suspect that the partner is really thinking "You shouldn't be into that, because that's awful", putting their honesty into question, rather than their willingness to leave their comfort zone being the true problem. Sometimes, that really is the case. But sometimes it's not, and the person just feels that their lover is willing to not be open and honest with them at all times if the consequence of that would be them risking hurting their feelings. Basically, sometimes communication issues stem from trust issues and BDSM is just about the most trust-oriented relationship element couples that partake in it share, so it's a trust-building activity, and any trust issues in bed obviously need to be addressed ASAP, but it's a bit more easy to do that in a BDSM relationship sometimes, because how people feel about that hobby can reflect how they feel about, and relate to, many aspects of their lives. Oversimplifying others' issues and your issues with them is a huge common cause of strife in any relationship, so don't do that! But, if you can find the true heart of a conflict by trying to understand the ones you love from their own perspectives, based on their base reasonings and the causes of things in their lives, that's always going to be more helpful than looking at the consequences and effects and trying to work out what they mean all by yourself. If someone's right for you, if you help them to explore themselves, they won't be upset with you for 'prying'---they'll love you all the more because you care! Take care, and find happiness anywhere you can, everyone!
that's a lot longer than i expected, and being open and trusting your partner and also further understanding them is indeed necessary for a relationship, but this is really helpful information to know thank you!
@@iamengie2573 Okay, then don't. There a reason you're commenting, then? Or just exercising the ole phalanges to illustrate the average length of your preferred reads?
Do people normally get confused between love and sexual attraction? I mean… 😂😂😂 it cannot be more clear. If you miss the person & you wanna talk to him as much as possible, you care about his well-being, you want to see him being successful with or without you… this is love. While sexual attraction doesn’t involve most of the above mentioned points, you will miss him & his body & your memory about him is the good sex you had. 😂You care about his life in general but not too much.
It largely has to do with your attachment style too I suppose. For anxious preoccupied people it is easier to form romantic feelings / feelings of love through sexual intimacy, while for avoidant people they seem to be in completely different worlds, compartmentalized in the brain.
I really needed this video at this moment, it’s like the first time I feel like my phone is listening to me and its not creepy 🎉❤ And I hope we all find both in our life time ❤;) Thank you psy-to-go🌸
Me and my girlfriend have decided to get ourselves indulge into a healthy sexual relationship... In such a time, the video really helped and it means a lot... Keep it up
Thank you! We wish you the best of luck in your intimate relationship with your girlfriend! We want to ask, which part of the video was helpful for you?
@@Psych2go The entire video was really good to be honest... But the best part was when you discussed the attachment style, this made me think that good sex can happen only when you are attached to your partner in a healthy way I suppose because unhealthy attachment somewhere reflects in sexual attachment as well I think. This thought that got provoked while watching the video really made me more confident about my first time sexual experiences... I mean before, I was sort of nervous whether or not I will be able to perform well but now I am confident that whatever it will be, it will be enjoyable for both of us as I have trust that my relationship and non sexual chemistry is pretty strong with her (even she said that she'll enjoy sex with me and I shouldn't be nervous about performance or anything as it will go well) So thank you for clearing it out. I am from a society where sex is a pure taboo and youngsters like me are unable to get healthy advices about such things... Keep going Psych2Go❤
I really want you guys to make a video on pmdd because we don’t see much about it and people try to make it seem as it’s the same thing as pms when they are totally two different things. I hope you could make a video on this in honor of pmdd awareness month🎗️💗
Just FYI, Dr. Emily Impett is not the lead researcher on any of the research you shared in this article. Don't get me wrong, she has contributed greatly to over 100 peer-reviewed journal articles, but to give her seemingly sole credit or head credit on the referenced research is seemingly taking away from the others, especially the lead researchers. I understand that it is easier to reference someone who has been involved in a lot of different studies about love, passion, sex, etc, but it is also important to credit the correct individuals when citing certain studies.
Good to know that I really feel love for my boyfriend and not just sexual desires🥰 this weekend we had a party and we later on the couch the whole night, trying to sleep but we couldn’t sleep so we just cuddled all night long with here and there a little kiss. And idk about him, but I didn’t think about sex at all, I just filled up with love for him and from him and I just wanted that moment to never end🥰🥰❤️
Hi phsych2go I'm such a big fan and ur videos always make me smile, I was really hoping to ask u a question but never was able to, Is it OK if I ask now?
Essentially this is a matter of Love vs Lust. Feeling of love; romantic sexual attraction; affection; friendliness. Lust: desire, appetite; inclination, pleasure; sensuous appetite. From the beginning, Love isn’t a mood. It’s a decision as much as it is a commitment, even when you’re not in the “mood” for it. The nature of lust however, comes and goes, as it lacks any desire to comprehend or integrate the necessary elements of its refined form..Love. Lust or sexual chemistry in this case, is one’s misinterpretation, misinformation, speculation or fear of commitment, attachment or perceived need of “freedom”, sexual or otherwise. The goal is to raise one’s consciousness and acknowledge that these supposed differences are only a matter of degree and when worked on properly, can be refined and aligned for better outcomes and fulfillment.
At this point, it's no longer surprising that Psych2Go will talk about sex. But in all seriousness, I do appreciate learning about the concept of sex from a psychological standpoint. Even if I still haven't partaken in it, let alone currently be in a relationship.
As much as I want to be in a loving and romantic relationship, I just can't help but not know what qualities I'm looking for in a partner and it's kind of frustrating and confusing for me who keeps complaining about wanting a gf. Doesn't help that I have this intrusive thought that every girl I interact with may be a potential date or something like that. I push those thoughts away so I can treat girls like any other human being but it's tiring. Anyone else can relate to what I'm going through?
I can definitely relate to this, thanks for sharing! It makes me feel less alone, and it’s hard for me to figure out what I want in someone as well ^^; I found myself rushing into relationships because I didn’t know what I wanted
I kinda have a problem that I’m dealing with, that being identifying if I just love that person platonically or romantically. These past few days have me feeling like I’m (romantically) in love JUST to end up feeling like I love them platonically. So is there an actual way to differ between platonic love and romantic love?
Omg i have the same exact problem, we were good friends beforehand and for the past year i’ve been kinda depressed and i don’t know if my (lack) of romantic feelings have to do with that or did the relationship just ran its course and all thats left is just really good and comfortable friendship so i can totally relate
I have the same problem, but what i do is(i don't know if this is the right method) i see how much i love that person. If i wanna determine if i love them platonic, i would think of my relationship with my parents, or friends, or siblings. U love them sooo much, but u don't have any desire of lust. But with my partner, i soemtimes feel lust. Although it's not often (cuz i am not used to the idea of lust) it helps me determine or draw a line. Idk if it helped u, but good luck
When you love someone a lot you usually break the barrier of friendship first step... Second step is when the fire goes down a subtle romance should be in place you should still enjoy that persons company until it comes back... Third step You make more effort and time to do new things and they reciprocate that feeling being more open and vulnerable deepens intimacy creating a more solid bond Fourth step Holding each other accountable to grow I lose a lot of ppl at this stage it is important that the love is actually growing this tends to be at the one year mark when everything is going cool...now there are things to work on and improve and usually ppl will break their patterns to excel with you or they won't take it further and that happens sometimes... Good luck
Though this does not help me in anyway since I am not in a relationship yet, but it does help me get ideas on my stories who have characters that want to be more than friends *and no it is not NSFW*
Thank you for sharing! And though you may not be in a relationship yet, maybe the videos can prepare you for when you do! :) We also hope that the videos will give you more insight when writing your stories! Good luck!
I asked my closed off husband to watch this with me. He said he won't watch a cartoon about relationships and to find one that is Biblically based and not a cartoon. I feel so uncared for. I love the Bible too but these things aren't being talked about alot on TH-cam. Not decent things anyway. I want to cry because I feel alone and trapped.
Your feelings are valid and it is normal to feel that way so don't let people gaslight you otherwise. Unfortunately, as the woman in a shaky Christian relationship you are at a clear disadvantage, especially if your husband will not listen to any other advice unless it's Christian. You do not have the support of your partner nor the support of your faith. Also, refusing to watch something because it is drawn, besides being shallow by focusing on the form instead of the content, is teenage immaturity. Watching a cartoon does not make one less of an adult or less of a man.
@Alexandru Voda thanks for the validation. I need that especially because of the gaslighting. I walked away from a conversation (useless and frustrating) thinking I might be crazy. He couldn't understand what I was saying. Sadly I was asking him to watch in an attempt to open the door to intimacy between us. The last time I talked told him something I wanted of that nature he said that he didn't have time for that and later complained that we're never together anymore. And he tells me that I'm crazy. People at church don't know and I can't tell them.
@@lisacurtis8162 you are not crazy. If you believe your husband can change, if you believe he loves you, then I hope you find a way to get through to him. However, if your husband gaslights you and consistently refuses to listen to your concerns, if you genuinely feel trapped with him, perhaps divorce might be an idea worth considering, even just for the sake of your mental wellbeing. I don't know how bad your situation is though, so I wish you the best of luck regardless. Listen to your gut and do whatever feels best for you.
I just don't need sex and something like that I just want her by my side I just like to see her happy and always laughing. I like when she smiles because of me but recently we broke up because she said she just lost interest in me cause she started getting attached to her friend and one day she said I don't want this relationship anymore I'm not happy I did everything I can to convince her but you can't force people to stay in your life right ? now I'm really anxious I just feel like I lost everything I can't even focus on my studies my recent exam didn't go as expected . I'm really hurt 😞 she is not the same person anymore she used to care for me a lot I never thought she'll just leave me like this . I'm completely lost my concentration and interest in other thinks . Every night I just cry knowing that she'll never be back 💔 But at least one of us is happy I just wish for her better life .
wow that's true love: wanting the other person to be happy, even if that means they're not with you. it takes time but i'm sure you'll move on and find someone who truly loves you back 🙏🏻 wishing you the best!
Timestamp about 4 Love vs Sexual Chemistry? How You Can Tell 0:00 intro 0:30 Num 1# Sex & Attachment 1:54 Num 2# Caring about each other's needs 3:05 Num 3# Is there (literally) romantic chemistry? 4:10 Num 4# Do you feel the same after sex? 5:15 Outro end here. @Deadly A55a551n5
There's a lot of things that I just sort of understand but I have problems putting into words. This video is one of those things. I can have HUGE lust for someone but after a while I stop caring as much and just want to enjoy my hobbies with them. Being lusty is fun, but most of my time will be spent not being lusty! Maybe slight pervert 👀BUT when The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom comes out there will be no lusting, only hobbying! I would feel disconnected if the only time I could enjoy a significant other's presence is during nighttime fun ._.
In my opinion..it's everything that happens and goes on before that ..all the flirting and playing and teasing.. it's what you say and how you act.. knowing it's gonna happen.. but making it so darn fun and exciting.. the build up.. YEAH..THATS HOW I SEE IT
I'm confused by the drawings with eyes or eyebrows with inward pointing angles, they mean to me the look of someone with selfish and often destructive intentions. But when I was in Korea, I saw it meaning a serious person, someone who does the right thing. What was your meaning here?
@@Psych2go we’re always affectionate and loving no matter what mood or what we’re doing. Like your video said, even after sex or before we treat each other the exact same way
Dang the one time I'm early, it happens to be a video on love and sex. I think the universe is tryna tell me something (or rub my singleness in my face lmaoo)
@@Psych2go all of it, but esp. The part when you talked about the 2 different reasons to have sex. Either for temporary gratification/something else or to Express love.
Love and sexual chemistry are two different things, although they may overlap at times. Love is an emotional bond between two people that involves caring, trust, and a deep connection, while sexual chemistry is a physical attraction that arises from pheromones and other biological factors.
Pro-tip for guys: if you get post n-t clarity months into the relationship u're probably not in love. If it's the opposite & you still feel the same for them like described in the video, it's likely more than just sex to you. 😌✌🏻
Timestamps
1). Sex and attachment 0:31
2). Caring about each others needs 1:55
3). Is there (literally) romantic chemistry 3:07
4). Do you feel the same after sex 4:13
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
Oh no, Timestamp, Great work and Quick fast. 👍
@@sbplankton_1999 thank you
@@A55a551n No problem, :)
Saves time. Thx🥳
@@Anthony-dj4nd not a problem happy to help
To engage in sexual contact of any kind with your partner means that you now see them as someone whom you're able to do more exploring with than anyone else you've ever had in your life. If it's with someone that doesn't have your best interest, it can get dangerous really quickly. However, if your partner genuinely cares about you with or without sex or intimacy, and wants you specifically to be happy with your life, regardless of what you choose to do, that's a sign that you are with someone that has your back, possibly forever, and that engaging in sexual or intimate activities with them will be because of their intense desire to connect with you even more deeply. Hopefully what I'm saying makes any sense. :)
beautifully put
@@lydiahiksan1232 Thank you! I try to help as best as I can.
I guess I just keep sending mixed messages if I ask about them having a boyfriend or not huh? Maybe it’s more important to show interest rather than tell cause… I won’t always know who exactly I’m interested in unless they decide to show some interest in me beforehand & whether I… feel like showing some of my interest in turn.
@@themidnightotaku22 It depends on who you're talking to, but I don't see asking about previous relationships as a negative thing so long as it doesn't dominate most conversations.
which is why i am afraid of going that route of having s*x with my partner. we may be still fresh in our relationship (4 months) and had some wild things in bed, but not the main dish. i have the desire, ofc i have if i am attracted to her, but its not this feeling of wanting it so deeply.
we cuddle, we cook, we eat, we watch, we sleep together but the thought of "losing" interest for a short time after getting relief is killing me. hope it wont be like that
My partner and I truly love each other. We felt a deep connection with each other. He only cares about making sure he had a connection with my mind and heart. He’s respectful and understanding. Sometimes I just want cuddles or I’m dealing with a lot. I love doing stupid mundane stuff with him like running errands because we’re spending time together. Even if we’re doing our own thing at home, he appreciates that I still interact with him from time to time. Sounds simple, but I love holding hands with him. My ex didn’t do that a lot. There’s also a lot of stuff that my fiancé considers normal in a relationship that’s new to me like cuddles. Oh how I love cuddles
Awww!
That's so nice and romantic of him to do that.
I am very happy that you are happy. I wish u it last forever
I really love this video.
It expresses the feelings of romantic people who love the idea of sex with their partner but hate the idea of sex being the center or the main part of the relationship.
I've seen so many people in comments sections trying to explain this mindset and they get absolutely flamed for it, saying their relationship is doomed to fail or the "man must be so miserable" and so on so forth. It's incredibly sad to see how people don't understand this, especially the adults of this generation.
Sex is a great, emotional, bonding, connecting thing to share in reference to the long term relationship built on love and affection; but, it's just one aspect. I love having a relationship where every aspect is prioritized and participated in equally, like affection, romance, innocence, playfulness, things seperate from sex that just make the idea and the action much more comfortable and welcome and wanted when it does come around. It's lovely.
I feel like I finally figured out what kind of person I am (when it comes to this).
@@discoskull it's always great to finally find some mental clarity after figuring out how you feel about something emotionally impactful such as this! (:
I disagree with everything having the same priority, you need to understand what you and your partner need. Not understanding that can lead to many conflicts
I have a question. How do males and females bond with each other? I don't see how men and women can bond (especially romantically) with each other. Men and women think very differently from each other. It seems like it's impossible for men and women to emotionally connect with each other.
I heard that gay and lesbian couples are happier than straight couples are, and I heard that gay and lesbian relationships are healthier than straight relationships are. The more similar you are to someone, the more easier it is to bond and connect with them.
People of the same sex/gender understand each other more easily, and there are no inbuilt societal power imbalances as there are between opposite-sex couples. Gay and lesbian couples understand each other better than straight couples do (due to them being the same gender as each other).
I heard that most straight couples are not happy being together, and I heard that people who are straight are much happier and much better off being single than they are being in a romantic relationship.
@@icysnow57cold64 first of all, thank you for your thoughtful comment and genuine question. The answer is, and I'm sorry to disappoint, there really isn't a single straight answer. I've heard a lot of the same things too, and you are right in your statement that at least on the surface, it's much easier to bond and connect with people who are similar to us, and that makes heterosexual relationships inherently hard.
This is something I think about a lot actually, but the reality is it's all based on the individual. I don't believe it's down to sex differences, I believe it's down to the way society upbrings men and women and the contrasts it creates in the way they hold themselves, the way they think, approach things, what they value, etc. Without so much internet influence, heterosexual relationships are actually much better than they seem! I've found this out through my own relationship, when we had less outside influence and external guidance that was totally biased towards gender specific things and goals and etc, we were happier and grew closer together.
We bond through shared experience, through communication and vulnerability, telling ourselves about one another and discovering new things about each other regularly, which is something that even years down the line is always possible. The ways we live, opinions we form, views we have, all eventually end up coming closer together and lining up because we are each other's biggest influence, goal, and priority. We want to think the same and have the same values, so the more we seek to understand one another through everyday openness, conversation, understanding, etc, the closer we actually come to that.
Every individual will be different about this though. You can't guarantee someone wants the same things or sees relationships the same way that you do or values the same things to the same extents. That is what makes relationships hard just in general, but maybe it's where same sex versus opposite sex relationships differ in that one is easier than the other.. at least possibly.
But, how people bond and connect is completely individual based.. and while gender can have an influence on that, I really believe it's beyond gender and more down to the person and who they are themselves. A lot of men (in my opinion) overvalue sex and undervalue the emotional, friendship side of relationships with women and women vice versa. Balance is much harder to find in these circumstances than same sex relationships; but it isn't always the case. All relationships when balanced (not just between sex and emotional value, but other things as well.. those are just the foundational aspects) are amazing, and bonding happens in relatively similar ways, it's just that possibly in same sex relationships, engaging in bonding activities (other than intercourse) are easier, more natural, and of higher priority more often than in opposite sex relationships and I can't really answer why that is. But it again all happens in similar ways. Sharing experiences, talking, communicating, having inside jokes, making things intimate and personal, consistency and building rituals, having fun by doing whatever you find fun personally and working to make ends meet. Even arguments can be bonding if they're done in healthy ways. Of course healthy physical intimacy, such as intercourse but other physical things like kissing, cuddling, hugging, are all big ways to bond as well. It's a lot of things and ways to bond get very individualistic and personal so, as sorry as I am for the monologue, it's really that simple 😂
This helped me realize that I DO have romantic feelings for the one I'm seeing. I don't just see them as a friend who I'm attracted to. I was always so worried about my mind being in the gutter, but even if we never kiss I'll still be happy with the relationship
Most wholesome comment in history.
0:00 intro
0:31 1. Sex and attachment
1:55 2. Caring about each others needs
3:06 3. Is there (literally) romantic chemistry
4:12 4. Do you feel the same after sex
5:15 conclusion
5:37 outro
Copied
This made me realize that I want to be more romantic towards my partner. I'm in love, my way of expression is very physical but hers is different, more words of affirmation and acts of love and I want to do that more now. Thank you
Sexual chemistry does definitely exist. It's possible for people to have an extremely intense physical connection. Probably the most tangible indicator of this is if a partner smells amazing.
I think a guide to whether you want them is if you've had a passionate and physical night, you still eagerly look forward to their messages the next morning as soon as you're apart. To be physically satisfied, but still want them is important.
Great insight! We also recently made a video about the importance of smell so we're happy to see that you brought up smell as one of the factors! :)
What about for me as I strewing really bad breath and BO no matter how clean I am. Should I just stop looking for a partner?
@@feeya2487 There is probably someone who finds your smell attractive
@@Psych2go where is it? I can't find it.
High Sexual Chemistry is Dangerous and can mean Childhood Trauma.
I didn't know how much I needed to learn about these differences. Thank you guys!
I just had a heartbreak 2 weeks ago with a girl that I’ve had a crush on for 3 years, and then I started watching your videos, I managed to find the definition of love and redefined myself. I just wanna say a big thank you!❤
Thank you so much for sharing something so personal with us. We wanted to ask, how are you doing now? Which videos do you think were helpful for you in defining love and redefining yourself?
I’m going through a heartbreak too. So, I feel you on that.
The last time we had sex, they were very distant and aloof afterwards, but in the beginning they weren’t like that. I have to accept that they no longer want me and only desire me when s e x is involved. I know that they once loved me and I do still think that they love me. But, they just don’t want me anymore. They just want s e x. For me it was love making, but for them it wasn’t, even though I still loved me.
It’ confusing, but I think that’s where we both stand.
I just have to accept that I’ll never be with them again.
@@Psych2go Thanks for asking, I’m doing every time better now, and via your contents, I found out that I’m an introvert type of person even though I don’t believe it .
I learned what makes introverts attractive and how to relate with them too.
Also, I stopped chasing for everybody and took a little break thinking about what are the characteristics I want in a partner? And also what this video says: Do I still feel attracted by the other half after s*x?
It really helped me a lot!
i think she felt the same too. (...both crushed.) tear. hehe
I've been watching this channel for years and I'd like to thank you guys for bring things up like gaslighting something my folks have done to me all my life... and so I love this so much
Clear your mind and cite one good thing in your life. Something you are grateful for. Something you are proud of. Something that makes you smile. Breathe in as you think of it.
I had a loving desire towards another woman a few times, but no matter what I did to win her love in return she never had any loving desire towards me but for someone else. They say if you love and respect her, let her go. If she comes back, you two are meant for each other. If she never comes back, it was never meant to be. This is why I'm still single.
Reciprocity is the only true test of genuine love. It is rare
Raise your hand if you've been watching Pysch2Go for a long time🤚
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Most botlike comment ever but I've been here for a while
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I love the little leaves that are above the characters heads. It's so cute to me 😊
I'm so early that the video hasn't been published yet 👀
how the
Bro is from mars
Wait what how?!
channel membership
HOW THE FU-
If you enjoyed the moment of sex with a person, you will feel attachment but that’s not love. You’re just in love with the memory of it.
Very interesting insight. In your opinion, what is the difference between attachment and love? How does one tell the difference?
@@Psych2go I think attachment could be a fear of being alone or many other things. Love would be when you know the person is right for you. In other words attachment can be a one sided relationship
Yeaaaaah my ex was definitely just sexually attached to me
Almost every time after we had sex he wanted to walk away or go do something by himself or turn off the lights.
He was almost always rough and made me do things that didnt pleasure me and a lotta times hurt me.
He always guilted me into doing rougher stuff because it was more “passionate”
He also never wanted to do anything away from the house with just me and him. He always had to invite his friends to literally everything.
What confuses me is that he didnt want to have sex very often. I think he had a porn addiction that he just never talked about even when I asked him. But it always made me feel not good enough.
I genuinely learned to love him, and every time I had an issue in our relationship he would get angry and just turn off when I would try to fix it. And I never brought up an issue harshly or without grace. Maybe once. But regardless thank you for your help and guidance in this video
Sorry he treated you like that love. You didn’t deserve that and I’m glad he’s your ex. Don’t beat yourself up for the past. You’ll know better for the future. YOUR pleasure is important!!
I do not usually comment in videos but I am going to do it this time in sake of my inner thoughts. I believe I have acquired a great understanding on what is love and what does it convey in the real world (by books, videos, and taoist teachings and most importantly personal experiences). "Romantic" love does not exist. What exists is an agreement of two people to build a relationship. This video is based off on the fact that people are getting confused between "love"? and "sexual chemistry"? Love is a verb and it is infinite in that sense, so yes you can actually portray love (or not) to someone or "love someone" even if it is just a SEXUAL relationship. Very hard to understand since wellbeing of this culture is very much based around three words "i love you". Second of all, healthy and real relationships are composed of two things: love and eroticism. If is only love we are experiencing with someone, it is safe to say they are a friend, a colleague, a co worker, etc.. Now, if it is just eroticism we are experiencing with someone, then it is safe to say they are great partners in bed. This can be worked, of course, when two adults come and agree on forming a real relationship. It was pretty interesting to me when the animation came out of the two figures after sex sleeping. Let me tell you, if that is the case in a real relationship, then it is better to go to sexuality therapy or as a matter of fact read, watch, listen and experience on what sexuality really means because you cannot base the outcome of a relationship if they are hugging each other or not after sex- especially because the majority of people think that sexuality are two things: sex and orgasm. In conclusion, redefinition on our understanding of sexuality and real relationships (not "romantic"-disney movies etc type of thing) is definitely going to remove any over explanation and over identification on things that at the end of the day are very simple to understand....
Thank you for being positive in this video about people who have relationships that are primarily about sex and not making it all about love, because not every relationship will be about love both partners, and sometimes yes, one is in the anxious, avoidant trap, sex may be used to appease the other person by the more avoidant partner, but there may be love from the more anxious partner
Thank you for your comment and insight! In your experience, what do you personally look for in a relationship?
I'm currently working on a love story between two unlikely characters that I previously had never put into a romantic relationship beforehand, so this video came at a solid time. :)
That sounds interesting! Will you drop the link when you finish it? :)
@@Psych2go Yeah sure! I already have a concept sketch of the two characters, but the story itself will take more time. Hopefully I can get started on it in the future. :)
I’ll be waiting too 😄 i’d love to read it in the future 🥰
@@bayuntorowiyono7378 You a fan of Super Smash Bros?
lmk when you're done :D
Great video. Short and well thought out. Thank You!
In other words, this describes lust vs. love. Giving into lust is basically allowing ourselves to be led around by our libido like a wild animal. We have to keep that lust under control, because that is how we hurt others and hurt ourselves, and prevent ourselves from finding a true connection.
Nah bro. Nah.
Thank you for your insight. In your personal opinion, how do you distinguish the difference between love and lust?
@@Psych2go Lust is pure sexual desire without love or true interest. The best way to distinguish between the two is to hold off on sex. Sexual desire is temporary and doesn't need to be satisfied immediately. That desire goes away and comes back. If you have the discipline to hold off and let the temporary desire go away, that'll help you see clearly and understand what you are feeling. That's the only healthy way to distinguish between the two.
Love or even just a true romantic interest in a person is lasting and doesn't go away along with the sexual desire.
A toxic way to know is to have sex with that person, and you'll know if an actual interest remains, but the potential damage has already happened by that point. You mentioned this method at 4:28. Another toxic way is to masterbate. This gets rid of the sexual desire immediately, and you'll know, but then the masterbation becomes like a drug to quell the sexual desire. It could become addicting which is like an abuse of orgasms, and you could become addicted to the thought of that person to get the fix.
@@Psych2go Its easy, Loving someone means you put them first before yourself, its selfless. Lusting for someone means you only want to use them, its selfish.
@@RockyAliTyson1 but that's not true. You can lust after someone withlist not using someone. Lusting is only having strong sexual desire for someone or a strong desire for something. It doesn't mean when you lust after someone you want to use them. You can also care for them just as much. After all you can't really not lust after someone you love unless you have no sexual desire to begin with. There are different kinds of love. Although even if you just lust after someone like i said doesn't mean you automatically want to use them.
I feel like this channel is stalking me. Last few vids are SPOT ON in terms of what information Im searching for currently. Absolutely perfect. Thank you!
What a pleasant coincidence! Or is it...?🤫😉
Everyone around me always talked about sexual chemistry and I thought I was weird, because that's not how I feel about my partner when I watch them regularly. I just get mesmerized by every particular on their face, I didn't knows it was romantic chemistry 😅😅
“Chemistry”, pffft. Never liked that term.
I wish I understood this 10 or 20 years ago. "Is this love?" "No, it's sexual chemistry". I probably would have still taken that road, but I likely wouldn't have tried to turn it into more than what it was.
Thank you for sharing your personal experience. In your experience, what was the key difference between love and sexual chemistry?
I'd like to point out some things related to relationships with any strain where BDSM has a significant presence. BDSM (pain and/or restraint play) of course isn't depraved by its nature as it has a reputation for being to some, but that said, couples who partake in it can benefit from bonding over discussing their proclivities toward bondage! There are three main sources of those inclinations: The one that's the first assumption for a lot of people is that enjoyment from it can be the result of trauma from past sexual assault, where the victim was forced to pretend to themselves or their attacker that they enjoyed what was happening, and that developed into a coping mechanism which just persisted into their standard relationships, but there are two more (and then some) still not very positive, but not always outright negative sources of those inclinations too. In a serious relationship, accepting your partner's interest in the practices of bondage doesn't have to be problematic for benefit to be had from discussing what about its appeal is its nature and origin for each person. Thinking about what it means to you, and/or means to them, can be profoundly helpful to better understanding your relationship with yourself and with your partner in a way that can have uses even outside of the bedroom. That style of sexuality always has a reason/origin (Are you a Scorpio? :}) and if you don't know it, it can be fun and insightful to consider. It can also sometimes help diagnose core issues in a relationship which are seemingly unrelated also, though.
The two remaining primary origins are
--- 1.) it can stem from the subconscious (and rarely, the conscious) desire to use it as a source of 'fuel' toward one's will to live, which doesn't necessarily mean that it staves off peoples' minds falling into suicidal territory, though in extreme cases, it can. It just means that it's the equivalent of thrill seeking for some more indoorsy types, and stimulates the body and mind into experiencing some, or many, symptoms of the fight or flight response, making the conclusion of each session psychologically rewarding to its participants. Low self-esteem or otherwise a person's lack of making a habit of setting short-term, easily-achievable, trackable goals for themselves (basically, the chronic lack of stimulation to the reward centers of the brain) can definitely contribute to making bondage, and particularly the elements of breath play and roleplay specifically involving power play (the sub playing willful/hard to get). The latter being a preferential thematic to someone might be indicative of trauma, perhaps even unrealized trauma, in their lives regarding them having, or at one time having had, a feeling of powerlessness over certain elements of their lives. Which leads to 2.)---
---2.) It can also stem from a person's intense focus on principals regarding their rights of self-expression, which may or may not be a focus for them based on their personal experience in feeling that what makes them, *them*, has been disrespected at times. It's not to say that BDSM is any more common in, for instance, homosexual relationships, but it *is* to say that homosexuals are less likely to view BDSM as being fundamentally in the interest of depraved individuals, because when BDSM behaviors being associated in a person's mind with their rights of self-expression and personal freedoms are determined to potentially be the actual cause of their interest in it, it can sometimes then be said to stem from that person experiencing it as a kind of rebellion against conformity---a private sort of activism that they can share with others who are likeminded. Which isn't a bad thing at all!
An example of problems in relationships which might not seem to be related to BDSM being a part of a couple's bonding behaviors though, but that knowing their origins may be able to help in troubleshooting, is when one partner makes it their personal goal to help the other be more open in the bedroom because they feel like that's what their partner wants (and often, that partner will have said as much), I've seen it happen more than once that the more open person in the relationship can begin to feel that the more reserved person is judging their 'wild side' as being deplorably depraved, or being symbolic of some negative trait about them that they in any case refuse to admit to feeling about them, simply because the boundaries that that person sets for either themselves, or their partner, or both, are.
In other words, obviously a successful BDSM relationship is founded on mutual trust and respect and the knowing of each others' boundaries and practicing them, but sometimes the nature of those boundaries either being crossed, or being something that one of the participants would prefer that the other allow to be crossed isn't as much a matter of them being fundamentally disrespectful people as it might initially seem. Sometimes people into the lifestyle don't even realize that they view others declining to partake in their more extreme preferences as them saying, without actually saying, that they find certain interests of theirs to be repulsive. When that's the case, it doesn't mean the relationship is doomed because it's going to rely on the partner accepting their more enthusiastically wild companion's preferences or it's a deal breaker. It just might *seem* that way, if one partner feels that the other is refusing to be open and honest because they're saying "I'm not into that", while they suspect that the partner is really thinking "You shouldn't be into that, because that's awful", putting their honesty into question, rather than their willingness to leave their comfort zone being the true problem.
Sometimes, that really is the case. But sometimes it's not, and the person just feels that their lover is willing to not be open and honest with them at all times if the consequence of that would be them risking hurting their feelings. Basically, sometimes communication issues stem from trust issues and BDSM is just about the most trust-oriented relationship element couples that partake in it share, so it's a trust-building activity, and any trust issues in bed obviously need to be addressed ASAP, but it's a bit more easy to do that in a BDSM relationship sometimes, because how people feel about that hobby can reflect how they feel about, and relate to, many aspects of their lives.
Oversimplifying others' issues and your issues with them is a huge common cause of strife in any relationship, so don't do that! But, if you can find the true heart of a conflict by trying to understand the ones you love from their own perspectives, based on their base reasonings and the causes of things in their lives, that's always going to be more helpful than looking at the consequences and effects and trying to work out what they mean all by yourself. If someone's right for you, if you help them to explore themselves, they won't be upset with you for 'prying'---they'll love you all the more because you care!
Take care, and find happiness anywhere you can, everyone!
that's a lot longer than i expected, and being open and trusting your partner and also further understanding them is indeed necessary for a relationship, but this is really helpful information to know thank you!
@@emericolomibaoiii766 You're verily welcome! All the best hopes and wishes to you!
@@Veldrusara thank you, you too.
Bro I don’t know if I wanna read a whole dam essay on this
@@iamengie2573 Okay, then don't. There a reason you're commenting, then? Or just exercising the ole phalanges to illustrate the average length of your preferred reads?
Do people normally get confused between love and sexual attraction? I mean… 😂😂😂 it cannot be more clear. If you miss the person & you wanna talk to him as much as possible, you care about his well-being, you want to see him being successful with or without you… this is love. While sexual attraction doesn’t involve most of the above mentioned points, you will miss him & his body & your memory about him is the good sex you had. 😂You care about his life in general but not too much.
What if it's the opposite?
I agree. It really isn't that difficult to tell the two apart. But that tells me where this culture is at, or at least where it's headed...
@@MyFatherIsTryingToKillMe 😹well at least in my own experience it’s like this
It largely has to do with your attachment style too I suppose. For anxious preoccupied people it is easier to form romantic feelings / feelings of love through sexual intimacy, while for avoidant people they seem to be in completely different worlds, compartmentalized in the brain.
That’s why you get to know them
Love is chemistry💟+ engaging💟+understanding💟
thanks for the information it actually helped
You're welcome! Could you tell us which part of the video you found helpful?
I really needed this video at this moment, it’s like the first time I feel like my phone is listening to me and its not creepy 🎉❤
And I hope we all find both in our life time ❤;)
Thank you psy-to-go🌸
Me and my girlfriend have decided to get ourselves indulge into a healthy sexual relationship... In such a time, the video really helped and it means a lot... Keep it up
Thank you! We wish you the best of luck in your intimate relationship with your girlfriend!
We want to ask, which part of the video was helpful for you?
That's great! Hope it works out for you! :D
Nice!
Hope it works out for you.
@@Psych2go The entire video was really good to be honest... But the best part was when you discussed the attachment style, this made me think that good sex can happen only when you are attached to your partner in a healthy way I suppose because unhealthy attachment somewhere reflects in sexual attachment as well I think. This thought that got provoked while watching the video really made me more confident about my first time sexual experiences... I mean before, I was sort of nervous whether or not I will be able to perform well but now I am confident that whatever it will be, it will be enjoyable for both of us as I have trust that my relationship and non sexual chemistry is pretty strong with her (even she said that she'll enjoy sex with me and I shouldn't be nervous about performance or anything as it will go well)
So thank you for clearing it out. I am from a society where sex is a pure taboo and youngsters like me are unable to get healthy advices about such things... Keep going Psych2Go❤
I really want you guys to make a video on pmdd because we don’t see much about it and people try to make it seem as it’s the same thing as pms when they are totally two different things. I hope you could make a video on this in honor of pmdd awareness month🎗️💗
Just FYI, Dr. Emily Impett is not the lead researcher on any of the research you shared in this article. Don't get me wrong, she has contributed greatly to over 100 peer-reviewed journal articles, but to give her seemingly sole credit or head credit on the referenced research is seemingly taking away from the others, especially the lead researchers. I understand that it is easier to reference someone who has been involved in a lot of different studies about love, passion, sex, etc, but it is also important to credit the correct individuals when citing certain studies.
Good to know that I really feel love for my boyfriend and not just sexual desires🥰 this weekend we had a party and we later on the couch the whole night, trying to sleep but we couldn’t sleep so we just cuddled all night long with here and there a little kiss. And idk about him, but I didn’t think about sex at all, I just filled up with love for him and from him and I just wanted that moment to never end🥰🥰❤️
That's great!
best comment
Three words, Oxytocin, Serotonin, Dopamine.
Hi phsych2go I'm such a big fan and ur videos always make me smile, I was really hoping to ask u a question but never was able to, Is it OK if I ask now?
Pysch2go is helping couples improve their relationship and singles are watching this for education purpose 😂
Exactly! 😂
I struggle with being open minded towards sex sometimes, most likely to how I was raised. Am grateful go this channel for opening my mind tho
Thank you so much for sharing your personal experience. In your opinion, do you think you will ever be 100% openminded about sexual intimacy?
@@Psych2go i believe i can, it might just take some time
Essentially this is a matter of Love vs Lust. Feeling of love; romantic sexual attraction; affection; friendliness.
Lust: desire, appetite; inclination, pleasure; sensuous appetite.
From the beginning, Love isn’t a mood. It’s a decision as much as it is a commitment, even when you’re not in the “mood” for it. The nature of lust however, comes and goes, as it lacks any desire to comprehend or integrate the necessary elements of its refined form..Love.
Lust or sexual chemistry in this case, is one’s misinterpretation, misinformation, speculation or fear of commitment, attachment or perceived need of “freedom”, sexual or otherwise. The goal is to raise one’s consciousness and acknowledge that these supposed differences are only a matter of degree and when worked on properly, can be refined and aligned for better outcomes and fulfillment.
At this point, it's no longer surprising that Psych2Go will talk about sex.
But in all seriousness, I do appreciate learning about the concept of sex from a psychological standpoint. Even if I still haven't partaken in it, let alone currently be in a relationship.
As much as I want to be in a loving and romantic relationship, I just can't help but not know what qualities I'm looking for in a partner and it's kind of frustrating and confusing for me who keeps complaining about wanting a gf. Doesn't help that I have this intrusive thought that every girl I interact with may be a potential date or something like that. I push those thoughts away so I can treat girls like any other human being but it's tiring. Anyone else can relate to what I'm going through?
I can definitely relate to this, thanks for sharing! It makes me feel less alone, and it’s hard for me to figure out what I want in someone as well ^^; I found myself rushing into relationships because I didn’t know what I wanted
It doesn’t help that the girls themselves automatically jump to the conclusion every interaction is sexual
What am I doing here?
FABULASTIC 🌟Does this really Work ?❤️ *LOVELOVELOVE* ❤
I kinda have a problem that I’m dealing with, that being identifying if I just love that person platonically or romantically. These past few days have me feeling like I’m (romantically) in love JUST to end up feeling like I love them platonically. So is there an actual way to differ between platonic love and romantic love?
Omg i have the same exact problem, we were good friends beforehand and for the past year i’ve been kinda depressed and i don’t know if my (lack) of romantic feelings have to do with that or did the relationship just ran its course and all thats left is just really good and comfortable friendship so i can totally relate
But please do tell if you find out the answer to your question
I have the same problem, but what i do is(i don't know if this is the right method) i see how much i love that person. If i wanna determine if i love them platonic, i would think of my relationship with my parents, or friends, or siblings. U love them sooo much, but u don't have any desire of lust. But with my partner, i soemtimes feel lust. Although it's not often (cuz i am not used to the idea of lust) it helps me determine or draw a line. Idk if it helped u, but good luck
@@randomytuser5827 thank you so much! I really appreciate it. :D
When you love someone a lot you usually break the barrier of friendship first step...
Second step is when the fire goes down a subtle romance should be in place you should still enjoy that persons company until it comes back...
Third step
You make more effort and time to do new things and they reciprocate that feeling being more open and vulnerable deepens intimacy creating a more solid bond
Fourth step
Holding each other accountable to grow I lose a lot of ppl at this stage it is important that the love is actually growing this tends to be at the one year mark when everything is going cool...now there are things to work on and improve and usually ppl will break their patterns to excel with you or they won't take it further and that happens sometimes...
Good luck
Psy! You are a genius!!!! You told us the real connection between the body and soul❤ over both perspectives! Tks a bunch
Please do a video about anxiety narcissism
Yes please do
Though this does not help me in anyway since I am not in a relationship yet, but it does help me get ideas on my stories who have characters that want to be more than friends *and no it is not NSFW*
Thank you for sharing! And though you may not be in a relationship yet, maybe the videos can prepare you for when you do! :)
We also hope that the videos will give you more insight when writing your stories! Good luck!
Im glad i answered all of the questions with a yes at around 4:20. Nice
I asked my closed off husband to watch this with me. He said he won't watch a cartoon about relationships and to find one that is Biblically based and not a cartoon. I feel so uncared for. I love the Bible too but these things aren't being talked about alot on TH-cam. Not decent things anyway. I want to cry because I feel alone and trapped.
Your feelings are valid and it is normal to feel that way so don't let people gaslight you otherwise. Unfortunately, as the woman in a shaky Christian relationship you are at a clear disadvantage, especially if your husband will not listen to any other advice unless it's Christian. You do not have the support of your partner nor the support of your faith.
Also, refusing to watch something because it is drawn, besides being shallow by focusing on the form instead of the content, is teenage immaturity. Watching a cartoon does not make one less of an adult or less of a man.
@Alexandru Voda thanks for the validation. I need that especially because of the gaslighting. I walked away from a conversation (useless and frustrating) thinking I might be crazy. He couldn't understand what I was saying. Sadly I was asking him to watch in an attempt to open the door to intimacy between us. The last time I talked told him something I wanted of that nature he said that he didn't have time for that and later complained that we're never together anymore. And he tells me that I'm crazy. People at church don't know and I can't tell them.
@@lisacurtis8162 you are not crazy. If you believe your husband can change, if you believe he loves you, then I hope you find a way to get through to him. However, if your husband gaslights you and consistently refuses to listen to your concerns, if you genuinely feel trapped with him, perhaps divorce might be an idea worth considering, even just for the sake of your mental wellbeing. I don't know how bad your situation is though, so I wish you the best of luck regardless. Listen to your gut and do whatever feels best for you.
@Luc ty for your comment. It's definitely one of the things I consider everyday when I'm trying to figure out what to do and how.
Leave him if he can’t appreciate you than he’s not the one for you
Yes i want
I just don't need sex and something like that I just want her by my side I just like to see her happy and always laughing. I like when she smiles because of me but recently we broke up because she said she just lost interest in me cause she started getting attached to her friend and one day she said I don't want this relationship anymore I'm not happy
I did everything I can to convince her but you can't force people to stay in your life right ? now I'm really anxious I just feel like I lost everything I can't even focus on my studies my recent exam didn't go as expected . I'm really hurt 😞 she is not the same person anymore she used to care for me a lot I never thought she'll just leave me like this . I'm completely lost my concentration and interest in other thinks . Every night I just cry knowing that she'll never be back 💔
But at least one of us is happy
I just wish for her better life .
I know it hurts. I’m sorry she wasn’t the one for you. Your person is still out there, keep improving yourself and you will find them
@@robopenguin5501 thanks I think moving on is the best option 😔
wow that's true love: wanting the other person to be happy, even if that means they're not with you.
it takes time but i'm sure you'll move on and find someone who truly loves you back 🙏🏻
wishing you the best!
Me watching this knowing that i'll never, ever, ever participate in something like that lol
Me who has no chances of having sex anytime soon still watching this:
The attachment segment was...insightful. Avoidant and anxious types really are a match made in hell.
Must be nice to have something to tell a difference from
to be honest, thank u very much :3 i falling in love the video cleared up some troubles that came to my mind. Thank u and keep up the good work
Timestamp about 4 Love vs Sexual Chemistry? How You Can Tell
0:00 intro
0:30 Num 1# Sex & Attachment
1:54 Num 2# Caring about each other's needs
3:05 Num 3# Is there (literally) romantic chemistry?
4:10 Num 4# Do you feel the same after sex?
5:15 Outro end here.
@Deadly A55a551n5
Why do you still watch a cartoon that’s not for you? Go do something else you weirdo.
Nice timestamp 👍👍👍👍💙💙💙💙
@@A55a551n Thank You, I Always like this. ❤❤❤❤
@@sbplankton_1999 not a problem 💙💙💙💙
Now this a great topic - Thanks 2Go 👌
Glad you think so!
There's a lot of things that I just sort of understand but I have problems putting into words. This video is one of those things. I can have HUGE lust for someone but after a while I stop caring as much and just want to enjoy my hobbies with them. Being lusty is fun, but most of my time will be spent not being lusty! Maybe slight pervert 👀BUT when The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom comes out there will be no lusting, only hobbying! I would feel disconnected if the only time I could enjoy a significant other's presence is during nighttime fun ._.
It worked flawlessly thank you 😂😂❤❤😢😮🎉😅🎉😢😂😮❤😅❤
Can you believe that I analysed all of that all by myself without knowledge or tryouts?
As someone who plans to stay a virgin all my life this was very helpful and informative.
We're glad that you found the video informative! Out of curiosity, is there a reason why you plan not to be physically intimate?
@@Psych2go I just personally don't desire that kind of interaction.
@@chwaftka9775 You live in Poland?
@@chwaftka9775 do you identify as an asexual person?
@@Traxl21 Asexual Panromantic
Wow really opened my eyes 😢
Good one. Thanks!
This should also be a part of sex ed or psych classes in hs
Completely agreed as a highschool student myself.
Thank you.. I did learn something
In my opinion..it's everything that happens and goes on before that ..all the flirting and playing and teasing.. it's what you say and how you act.. knowing it's gonna happen.. but making it so darn fun and exciting.. the build up.. YEAH..THATS HOW I SEE IT
I'm confused by the drawings with eyes or eyebrows with inward pointing angles, they mean to me the look of someone with selfish and often destructive intentions. But when I was in Korea, I saw it meaning a serious person, someone who does the right thing. What was your meaning here?
At some point even the narrator had eyes like this, thus me very confused...
Hey friend, I found your relationship videos informative, keep on uploading more interesting videos. 😊
Hold on to love ❤
That was nice! Thanks ❤❤❤
This is different!! 😮
I learned alot from this!
This video made me feel happy and secure about me and my girlfriends relationship because we have exactly this
Thank you for sharing! We're so glad that you're able to find the video relatable! Which part of the video did you resonate with the most?
mr bombastic LOL
@@deathlyshivers8601 hm?
@@Psych2go we’re always affectionate and loving no matter what mood or what we’re doing. Like your video said, even after sex or before we treat each other the exact same way
this video helped a lot tanks
Dang the one time I'm early, it happens to be a video on love and sex. I think the universe is tryna tell me something (or rub my singleness in my face lmaoo)
Same.
I feel like i can never find TRUE love, ever again….just because, I have a traumatic brain injury…..but that’s another story….😕
Does zodiac signs have to do with anything about love or this topic on the video
Thank you ❤
Age has a lot to do with it as our priorities and chemistry change at different life stages.
Amazing and informative video.
So nice of you! :) Which part of the video did you like?
@@Psych2go all of it, but esp. The part when you talked about the 2 different reasons to have sex. Either for temporary gratification/something else or to Express love.
We need to get to know each other better first.
Making love and having sex are too completely different things an this video explains it well
Love and sexual chemistry are two different things, although they may overlap at times. Love is an emotional bond between two people that involves caring, trust, and a deep connection, while sexual chemistry is a physical attraction that arises from pheromones and other biological factors.
u posted this at 5am my time 😂
Thank you Psych2Go for covering sensitive topics
Psych2go hits different at 3am when you should be sleeping 😭
The hardest thing to do to have a great sex is basically to find a partner
Thanks!
I needed this vid a long time ago
this was perfect
Pro-tip for guys: if you get post n-t clarity months into the relationship u're probably not in love. If it's the opposite & you still feel the same for them like described in the video, it's likely more than just sex to you. 😌✌🏻
I think so ✋
So people who have anxious attachment style enjoy pleasing their partners
And
People with avoidant attachment style have seggs to avoid conflict
Thank you for information i will never be able to use (i like genshin)
Can you make a video about not having a libido or not a high libido and what can help with it ?
This sounds like an interesting idea. If we were to make a video on this topic, what would you like to see in it?
Don't be afraid to pursue real love when you find it.
See...When you hear the word SEX...
Everyone's eyes bulge out and ears get raised and piloerection 😮
Psych2GO, please consider a video on limerence, a very confounding experience.