Hey I got a request it's not different from this video but thought it was relevant why sigmas are abandoned by family or sigma characteristics that push everyone even family away?
You don’t become a Sigma, you were born with that personality trait and at sometime it took over your life. Your personality has poor ability to communicate because you have an inability to be authentic with your needs and feelings. Listen to the words of the artificial intelligence speaker carefully. This is a personality disorder and that isn’t something that you develop. God made you differently. You can be highly intelligent in many aspects but some common sense social traits get lost. Pretending you’re perfect isn’t the case, just different.
I walked away from my entire family about 10 years ago. All of my siblings are Toxic and do everything they can to harm me. They show me absolutely Zero Respect and breach my boundaries constantly. As none of them have ever apologized for their behavior I assume they are passing on their Toxic mentality to their children, so I blocked their offspring too... I am now completely alone in life, but for my friends. Should a friend demonstrate toxic behavior, I remove them too... Life is too short to tolerate dysfunctional people... End the behavior now and don't allow it to continue. It has been a lonely road, but I feel better for it. Thanks for the insights and affirmations in this video... 🙂
Have done the same thing almost two years ago. Cut out some of the last friends I had a couple of years before family. I'm not going to say it's been easy but it's getting better and I've learned a lot about myself recently. Didn't even know anything about Sigma traits until three months ago. Stay strong, you're not alone.
I agree with you. They don't apologize because they can't see you or themselves. They are living in their heads and have taught their offspring to do the same.
That's a courageous power move of self respect and self love.. Did the same as a Sigma female. Walked from all of them...Got peace, freedom and sanity . No compromise.
I can relate. I have nothing in common with my family and only see them when I have absolutely got to. going through it right now. I have to just get away to do my own things again.
My wife’s family was the narcissist I had never heard of the word didn’t even know what it meant until recently. After 20 years of marriage and seven kids together, she turned into one, after an additional 18 years of enduring verbal abuse. I finally had enough.
I considered leaving my family at the age of 18. But I finally did in my early thirties. I did it incrementally and quietly. A therapist suggested the decision. When I started doing it, it felt like a load of stones was lifted off my shoulders. And yes, the family was in shock. It hadn't expected that. It would avenge that defeat. So it was revenged. But even though the price was very high, I have not regretted it.
Yes, this is right on. I am the patriarch of my family. I am the fixer, the responsible one and the one everyone relies on. Those days are numbered. They may never hear from me again, and I am okay with that. Thank you for this video.
It’s hard! I actually moved back home with my parents last year jobless and it was the worst decision of my life. I got super depressed after a month then had a dream which I translated to my parents being demons basically and causing my depression. I realized they were evil and changed my life accordingly(over a year). I am completely emotionally detaches from them at this point. It’s like they died and I mourned their deaths. Keep growing your desire to leave them and find peace. It will happen.
As a Sigma female, I too walked away from toxic family and so called "friends " five years ago. Kept only a couple of true friends who respect my individuality and accepts me for me. Gained peace, happiness, freedom removing the " deadwood". My alone feels so good. I'll have you only if you're sweeter than my solitude. Not to be compromised ❤
Hey Wendy. May I ask you a sincere question, which I was not able to answer for myself so far: Since a woman is hardwired for children, there is no chance for a fulfilling life without them, is it? In the eyes of childless older woman I have met in my life so far you can see nothing but emptiness and grief. I always wanted to talk to a childless sigma woman and ask about her experience. Is it possible for a woman to find peace and happiness without an own child?
I went no contact. I tell people it’s like this: “Hey, do you know that you’re always wrong, and what you like isn’t really good? Now, listen to me complain, but don’t offer solutions, because you’re always wrong.” (After years of this) “Hey, where did you go?”
I am Japanese-American, male, heterosexual, born in Seattle in 1973, where I grew up. A Sigma Male. I loved my Dad, BUT I seriously think that, to some degree, he felt that "just because somebody is older than you, that automatically gives them the right to trample on you." With this thinking, I do not agree.
When it comes to my "Older automatically means > the younger person" misconception, I DO think that my Japanese-American heritage is a factor, in my family feeling this way. It also has much to do with the time period my father was born and raised in, too (born in 1939 in Seattle).
Wow another one that resonates. I've walked away from both sides of my family and countless so called friend. Toxicity being the main reason and for nearly all the reasons mentioned in this vid. Awesome thank you
This is exactly how i see it and showed me why i don’t have anything to do with my family. It described it perfectly and gave me greater understanding of how i came to my decision and why i chose to live the way i do.. Thank you
In my own family, I was told that: - "You have changed !" - "If you can give, you have to give !" - "I have paid everything for you and you don't give me anything" - ... I felt so bad on those moment. I felt so guilty. But I realized that they did nothing to make our family situation better. They are capricious, don't make the effort to have a better situation or even worst, they don't bring a moment of peace. Because I have a good job, they asked me to pay for everything. I was helping a family member to have a better situation for 4 years. I just started to help a few month after getting my first job. Words don't work with this kind of person, the only way to have peace of mind was to walk away stealthly over the years.
Sigmas walk away from family because they were treated like punching bags. Videos about sigmas should carry the label: For sigmas to discover themselves and know they're not alone only-not for everyone else to try to be one.
Very true. I have a verbaly abusive sister who plays the victim card when confronted with facts. Always welcome for conversation when self reflection and respect are obvious, otherwise; have a great and nice life. All the best
I walked away from what is left of my family ... the total disrespect was too much. Not the first time, but this time it's different and my wife recognized it. Scared her a little but she realizes she safe. My mother's side booted me many years ago and I laughed all the way to the bank !!! ... whose going to bail you out now when you can't make the rent?
I walked away from family in 2019 and finally broke the generational curse. Having to basically hurt the entire family to my point across that none of their b.s will be tolerated by no means nor does guilt trips work.
yes, and I have just started the process which is amazingly gratifying. and oddly enough, I have no regret and nor should I the tank is full. I can’t use any of this tournament in this content as a catalyst of growth. I’ve reached my plateau and gained skills that oddly enough they help me wailed so so long and thanks for all the fish !! ❤
I naturally evolved into a Sigma mainly because my parents were mentally ill, brainwashed child abusers. They never showed any affection, encouragement, or validation to me and my six siblings. They never stopped trying to dictate to us what we could think say and do even though their lives were a dysfunctional shit show. I learned at an early age how to be self sufficient out of necessity and stopped talking to them for the last 20 years of their lives. I never want to see them again anywhere.
I was never anybody's fixer, not that I wouldn't ever fix things. Maybe the one thing that kept that pretty much away, is me just giving it, mostly out of speaking of scenarios where their problem could possibly be saved another way. IOW, just like how I led when I was boss at work, I present some direction I can get your mind to thinking on, and usually not much more (I'm giving them something of a broad outline, then they apply their specific details to fill in). If they counter or come up with another move, I'm looking at that too. I never believed much in waiting for somebody to ask my advice, because it never is asked that way, or, most likely, they see me too humbly to think I could help all that much. Part of my family's problem is that we just get it right in the first place so much, there's no need to ask advice. Like I've said in recent days, if I always make a decision which is only 1% better than the alternative, I've done the best I can, and doing that over a long period of time, with many instances being more dramatic than that, you'll be very surprised how well you find yourself at retirement. I'm just smiling ear-to-ear these days, if I would, because you can say "I've made it!" and of course, I'm not letting up, but probably accelerating. The freedom of being over with schooling after high school, and the freedom of not working for the man much later, is just awesome - true living. For anybody that's curious, I didn't grow up in a dysfunctional family, though compared to society it was, but then society is dysfunctional, at least for the last forty years. We pretty much lived a sigma family existence at least with not having much of anything to do with friends, etc. We were all just quite private people, probably mostly because the personality of the family largely got lost (mom) by losing her hearing. If mom didn't lose her hearing, and people weren't treating her like crap so much, I might've never went sigma all that much, but her losing that, it really set us apart from society (so see, that's not really dysfunctional).
Before beginning the video, I'll answer the title quandary, from 'MY' perspective: Because, with a 'modern family' comes expectations, just as the show 'Modern Family' relays (I've never watched it, but from the reviews and clips, it's quite clear). 'Modern family' requires constant conformity to society's sociopathic tendencies to change definitions and 'laws' at a whim...as if that's really possible. No, rather than stay imbedded in insanity, we separate ourselves from it.
Growing up, I was the main achiever among my siblings. My parents made me feel guilty whenever my younger brothers struggled to find or keep jobs. They learned to exploit my loyalty by guilt-tripping me into “doing more” for everyone in the family-and I did. They benefited tremendously and continue to reap the rewards of my labor and money. Eventually, they fabricated reasons to remain displeased with me. I had enough. I remained quiet and composed but secretly planned my emigration to the other side of the world. Now, I suspect they may be narcissists.
I've completely abandoned my family mainly due to my narcissistic mother. I'm not trying to say I'm sigma I'm pretty torn between weather I'm intp or infj. Mostly likely an intp that admires the thought of being a sigma. But I do relate a lot with the sigma mindset and feel like to be my best self this is the best direction to go. It's been nearly 3 years since I went no contact and it's the best decision I've ever made in my life it's just a shame I had to live through 35 years of toxicity before making that decision.
I left my family twice because I didn't feel as if I was part of the family.. They looked for me, obviously! And wondering "why" I left. Besides my sister's, I haven't spoken to any family! Cousin's, Aunt's, Uncle's, my Godmother/Godfather, etc, etc. I only see them I feel like only when I have too, my sister's make me come to the family gathering's and holiday's.. The whole "hi! How you been"? "We've missed you"! Is so fake!!
Years ago, I had to step away from many of the family get togethers, because my family were hard drinkers and partygoers. I didn’t want that for my boys so I stayed away during those times. My boys are now in their 30’s. We’re still not drinkers. I stopped that generational trend. Unfortunately, my father died from cirrhosis of the liver many years ago, though we did get to say our goodbyes.
Sigma: I want to take care of you. I'm successful, I have wealth and a home with space for you, all you have to do is come to me. Family: No, we won't leave this place because we've never lived anywhere else. But you owe us, so just give us all your money. Sigma: Click.
Sometimes, both people are born into families with significant family of origin issues. That ticking time bomb became apparent to me during the conflict or crisis, of whether or not to have children. Having kids to save the broken marriage was not an option for me, despite all the guilt tripping and gaslighting. Healing ourselves as individuals, then as a couple, was a necessary prerequisite,IMHO, before parenting. As My partner's bio clock was ticking, divorce threats became more frequent . During/after the separation/divorce, i pursued individual and group therapy. It changed my life-i broke past historical patterns, retooled my career. All for the better. I honestly believe a childless life was better for both of us.
I cut ties with family about 15 years ago and no way I will go back No respect no boundaries always blame for something and my hard work money belongs to them? F no I'm out The rest of the family might be next
The "toxic elder" thing rings true. Back in the 1990s I interviewed candidates for a position in my company. One was a young Russian man about 23. I asked him what was the biggest problem he had working in Russia. He said, "It's because in Russian culture, you have to respect your elders, and show deference even when you know they're wrong." I told him, "You want have that problem in America, because here young people think anybody older than they are is stupid. And they are not afraid to say so." He about fell out of his chair laughing and said, "I love America!"
POINT 2 is certainly contentious… What you don’t understand, is the freedom that comes from following the Biblical pattern of forgiveness….of respecting your elders regardless…not being a door mat, but respecting There is GREAT freedom in letting go and being respectful even to people who don’t deserve respect At the same time, you don’t just doll out respect Willy Nilly, TRUE RESPECT IS EARNED….but you can still CHOOSE to act and speak respectfully, even to a total fool ESPECIALLY your elders….THIS is the sigma way….the other description given is one of a self centred embittered sigma…who has no stoic self control BIG DIFFERENCE !! Blessings to all who read.
Well not all of us walked a way some are pushed a way still if you made it and survived that means you have achieved it's not easy but well worth it plus we are not alone so many of us Sigma's lone wolf's are the true winners 🏆🥇🏆 big up boys and girls.😊
These common beliefs, like "blood is thinker than water," "respect your elders no matter what," "family is everything," "you owe me respect," are all the same! In plain English, utter BS accepted by society and society gets mad when we sigmas question it all!
Both my parents are narcissistic sociopaths, clingy & overly controlling I will be walking away from them very soon once I find work in the country where my wife lives
Idk if i can say this is a sigma characteristic vs just someone whos healthy . I mean if we want to name it sigma fine . But plenty of people get healthy , learn lessons , and implement all these things listed .
We are born alone, and we die alone. Some are under the illusion that we can expand ourselves while living with others. The reality is that everyone thinks of themselves first. Participation with others only exists where participation costs do not exceed acceptable loss. Beyond that, self-preservation clicks in, and "like everyone else," we look after ourselves. We understand that each person is responsible for themselves in reality. I will risk my life for my brother because I place his value equal to the value I have for myself, so again I am my primary concern. His loss is not acceptable to me. This is the way it is for everyone except masochists and those who choose to live in their heads outside of reality.
This sounds like a rebellous young generational "idiot's" excuse for why HE refuse's too value there PARENTS REARING of Good Proven VALUES! Thus,, ran away from HOME and now REGRETS being exsposed too thee enviroments of weather and abuse. And instead of falling inline is now attempting another manipulative move of; its your FAULT that poor me is isolated, hungry, cold and wet! And I am only 40 years old! How dare you cut tyes and abandon me!
This comes across as a feel good exercise and justification for every choice a “sigma male” makes. They are fallible and imperfect just like all of the other letters in the alphabet.
Agree with it all. I look back at my five siblings & think they are pathetic. “The family is nothing more than the first link in a chain that binds the individual to an existence of suffering." Albert Caraco.
Hey everyone! Thanks so much for watching. If you enjoyed the video, drop a like on it and subscribe for more! I really do appreciate it! 👍🏻👍🏻
Hey I got a request it's not different from this video but thought it was relevant why sigmas are abandoned by family or sigma characteristics that push everyone even family away?
Most of the time we became a sigma because we grew op in a narcissistic family
Confirmed!
You don’t become a Sigma, you were born with that personality trait and at sometime it took over your life. Your personality has poor ability to communicate because you have an inability to be authentic with your needs and feelings. Listen to the words of the artificial intelligence speaker carefully. This is a personality disorder and that isn’t something that you develop. God made you differently. You can be highly intelligent in many aspects but some common sense social traits get lost. Pretending you’re perfect isn’t the case, just different.
Yep!
We were forced to learn to run primarily on our own sense of internal validation, as we just didn't much external validation growing up.
True
💰
I’m sick and tired of the guilt trips, disrespect, and judgments.
Sorry, you're not a sigma
I walked away from my entire family about 10 years ago. All of my siblings are Toxic and do everything they can to harm me. They show me absolutely Zero Respect and breach my boundaries constantly. As none of them have ever apologized for their behavior I assume they are passing on their Toxic mentality to their children, so I blocked their offspring too... I am now completely alone in life, but for my friends. Should a friend demonstrate toxic behavior, I remove them too... Life is too short to tolerate dysfunctional people... End the behavior now and don't allow it to continue. It has been a lonely road, but I feel better for it. Thanks for the insights and affirmations in this video... 🙂
You're awesome as you are in peace, but you already know that. 👍
Have done the same thing almost two years ago. Cut out some of the last friends I had a couple of years before family. I'm not going to say it's been easy but it's getting better and I've learned a lot about myself recently. Didn't even know anything about Sigma traits until three months ago. Stay strong, you're not alone.
Same here ,its definitely better and worth it ,look ahead always
I agree with you. They don't apologize because they can't see you or themselves. They are living in their heads and have taught their offspring to do the same.
That's a courageous power move of self respect and self love.. Did the same as a Sigma female. Walked from all of them...Got peace, freedom and sanity . No compromise.
I can relate. I have nothing in common with my family and only see them when I have absolutely got to. going through it right now. I have to just get away to do my own things again.
Respect 💯😎🫡
Totally agree, I’ve been on this for years now cut off all ties
I agree totally. It explains everything, and why I left.
Total and Compete in less than 10 Minutes..
My wife’s family was the narcissist I had never heard of the word didn’t even know what it meant until recently. After 20 years of marriage and seven kids together, she turned into one, after an additional 18 years of enduring verbal abuse. I finally had enough.
I considered leaving my family at the age of 18. But I finally did in my early thirties. I did it incrementally and quietly. A therapist suggested the decision. When I started doing it, it felt like a load of stones was lifted off my shoulders. And yes, the family was in shock. It hadn't expected that. It would avenge that defeat. So it was revenged. But even though the price was very high, I have not regretted it.
Yes, this is right on. I am the patriarch of my family. I am the fixer, the responsible one and the one everyone relies on. Those days are numbered. They may never hear from me again, and I am okay with that. Thank you for this video.
A stranger going through this how coincidence
It’s hard! I actually moved back home with my parents last year jobless and it was the worst decision of my life. I got super depressed after a month then had a dream which I translated to my parents being demons basically and causing my depression. I realized they were evil and changed my life accordingly(over a year). I am completely emotionally detaches from them at this point. It’s like they died and I mourned their deaths. Keep growing your desire to leave them and find peace. It will happen.
As a Sigma female, I too walked away from toxic family and so called "friends " five years ago.
Kept only a couple of true friends who respect my individuality and accepts me for me. Gained peace, happiness, freedom removing the " deadwood".
My alone feels so good. I'll have you only if you're sweeter than my solitude. Not to be compromised ❤
Rock on!!
Hey Wendy. May I ask you a sincere question, which I was not able to answer for myself so far: Since a woman is hardwired for children, there is no chance for a fulfilling life without them, is it? In the eyes of childless older woman I have met in my life so far you can see nothing but emptiness and grief. I always wanted to talk to a childless sigma woman and ask about her experience. Is it possible for a woman to find peace and happiness without an own child?
Once I left I’d stop by for the holidays to see my mother. After her sudden death I walked away for good.
Great informational video,keep it up.
Thank you!
Not just family I would like to add. I'm getting fed up with everyone with the mentioned qualities or lack off. 😉
Yes, I went no contact with the whole extended family, anyone they know and all but one of my friends. We are magnets for toxic people.
You nailed this! I am SIGMA, tried, and true to myself worth! Left the "family years ago 50 and counting.
Self love is the best love do what's best for you
I went no contact. I tell people it’s like this: “Hey, do you know that you’re always wrong, and what you like isn’t really good? Now, listen to me complain, but don’t offer solutions, because you’re always wrong.”
(After years of this)
“Hey, where did you go?”
Brilliant and true! 🤣
I am Japanese-American, male, heterosexual, born in Seattle in 1973, where I grew up. A Sigma Male. I loved my Dad, BUT I seriously think that, to some degree, he felt that "just because somebody is older than you, that automatically gives them the right to trample on you." With this thinking, I do not agree.
ME NEITHER!!! Such BS and is socially accepted! I'm the bad guy because I don't accept this!
My pop favorite my older brother and that's ok
When it comes to my "Older automatically means > the younger person" misconception, I DO think that my Japanese-American heritage is a factor, in my family feeling this way. It also has much to do with the time period my father was born and raised in, too (born in 1939 in Seattle).
Wow another one that resonates.
I've walked away from both sides of my family and countless so called friend.
Toxicity being the main reason and for nearly all the reasons mentioned in this vid.
Awesome thank you
I walked away from my family at 17 and never looked back. And then again at 36.
Very true . Excellent analysis
Absolutely my style, from A to Z. Nice video.
This is exactly how i see it and showed me why i don’t have anything to do with my family. It described it perfectly and gave me greater understanding of how i came to my decision and why i chose to live the way i do.. Thank you
All true thanks for sharing, i really appreciate this.
In my own family, I was told that:
- "You have changed !"
- "If you can give, you have to give !"
- "I have paid everything for you and you don't give me anything"
- ...
I felt so bad on those moment. I felt so guilty. But I realized that they did nothing to make our family situation better. They are capricious, don't make the effort to have a better situation or even worst, they don't bring a moment of peace. Because I have a good job, they asked me to pay for everything. I was helping a family member to have a better situation for 4 years. I just started to help a few month after getting my first job. Words don't work with this kind of person, the only way to have peace of mind was to walk away stealthly over the years.
A brilliant video. It sums up my experience exactly. Thanks for posting.
We all know people are toxic family or not... I fully understand sigmas 💛
Great Video. I lot of these points hit for me.
This also applies to one's country.
100%
Brought me to tears 💯
I'm 59 years old ,I have three kids of my own. You have just summed up my entire life and my mindset in this one brief video.
I Moved away and didn't tell them Where ! 😁🤕
Sigmas walk away from family because they were treated like punching bags. Videos about sigmas should carry the label: For sigmas to discover themselves and know they're not alone only-not for everyone else to try to be one.
This is REAL!! I've walked away from my family for years now
Very true. I have a verbaly abusive sister who plays the victim card when confronted with facts. Always welcome for conversation when self reflection and respect are obvious, otherwise; have a great and nice life. All the best
I walked away from what is left of my family ... the total disrespect was too much. Not the first time, but this time it's different and my wife recognized it. Scared her a little but she realizes she safe. My mother's side booted me many years ago and I laughed all the way to the bank !!! ... whose going to bail you out now when you can't make the rent?
I had to cut off all ties with my family. They became so draining and vexing. I only talk with my baby sister. Everyone had to go 💯
I walked away from family in 2019 and finally broke the generational curse. Having to basically hurt the entire family to my point across that none of their b.s will be tolerated by no means nor does guilt trips work.
yes, and I have just started the process which is amazingly gratifying. and oddly enough, I have no regret and nor should I the tank is full. I can’t use any of this tournament in this content as a catalyst of growth. I’ve reached my plateau and gained skills that oddly enough they help me wailed so so long and thanks for all the fish !! ❤
I naturally evolved into a Sigma mainly because my parents were mentally ill, brainwashed child abusers. They never showed any affection, encouragement, or validation to me and my six siblings. They never stopped trying to dictate to us what we could think say and do even though their lives were a dysfunctional shit show. I learned at an early age how to be self sufficient out of necessity and stopped talking to them for the last 20 years of their lives. I never want to see them again anywhere.
Spot On!!! I lived it.
I was never anybody's fixer, not that I wouldn't ever fix things. Maybe the one thing that kept that pretty much away, is me just giving it, mostly out of speaking of scenarios where their problem could possibly be saved another way. IOW, just like how I led when I was boss at work, I present some direction I can get your mind to thinking on, and usually not much more (I'm giving them something of a broad outline, then they apply their specific details to fill in). If they counter or come up with another move, I'm looking at that too. I never believed much in waiting for somebody to ask my advice, because it never is asked that way, or, most likely, they see me too humbly to think I could help all that much. Part of my family's problem is that we just get it right in the first place so much, there's no need to ask advice. Like I've said in recent days, if I always make a decision which is only 1% better than the alternative, I've done the best I can, and doing that over a long period of time, with many instances being more dramatic than that, you'll be very surprised how well you find yourself at retirement. I'm just smiling ear-to-ear these days, if I would, because you can say "I've made it!" and of course, I'm not letting up, but probably accelerating.
The freedom of being over with schooling after high school, and the freedom of not working for the man much later, is just awesome - true living. For anybody that's curious, I didn't grow up in a dysfunctional family, though compared to society it was, but then society is dysfunctional, at least for the last forty years. We pretty much lived a sigma family existence at least with not having much of anything to do with friends, etc. We were all just quite private people, probably mostly because the personality of the family largely got lost (mom) by losing her hearing. If mom didn't lose her hearing, and people weren't treating her like crap so much, I might've never went sigma all that much, but her losing that, it really set us apart from society (so see, that's not really dysfunctional).
Never heard a video explain me to me like this.Thanks
Thanks good job,
Before beginning the video, I'll answer the title quandary, from 'MY' perspective:
Because, with a 'modern family' comes expectations, just as the show 'Modern Family' relays (I've never watched it, but from the reviews and clips, it's quite clear). 'Modern family' requires constant conformity to society's sociopathic tendencies to change definitions and 'laws' at a whim...as if that's really possible.
No, rather than stay imbedded in insanity, we separate ourselves from it.
Yes definitely that no 1..and yes all of them not only to family..but toward everyone
1000% agree..
Growing up, I was the main achiever among my siblings. My parents made me feel guilty whenever my younger brothers struggled to find or keep jobs. They learned to exploit my loyalty by guilt-tripping me into “doing more” for everyone in the family-and I did. They benefited tremendously and continue to reap the rewards of my labor and money. Eventually, they fabricated reasons to remain displeased with me. I had enough. I remained quiet and composed but secretly planned my emigration to the other side of the world. Now, I suspect they may be narcissists.
Yes, I believe this ideology so much and should be the way to go for all else.
Family what's that
Broken, broke, alone and brutally honest
(Mattew 10:36) “And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.”
I've completely abandoned my family mainly due to my narcissistic mother. I'm not trying to say I'm sigma I'm pretty torn between weather I'm intp or infj. Mostly likely an intp that admires the thought of being a sigma. But I do relate a lot with the sigma mindset and feel like to be my best self this is the best direction to go. It's been nearly 3 years since I went no contact and it's the best decision I've ever made in my life it's just a shame I had to live through 35 years of toxicity before making that decision.
I left my family twice because I didn't feel as if I was part of the family.. They looked for me, obviously! And wondering "why" I left. Besides my sister's, I haven't spoken to any family! Cousin's, Aunt's, Uncle's, my Godmother/Godfather, etc, etc. I only see them I feel like only when I have too, my sister's make me come to the family gathering's and holiday's.. The whole "hi! How you been"? "We've missed you"! Is so fake!!
Cuz In a war, you always fight ones you're closest to.
Though heaven and earth only my peace is the untouched one.
Years ago, I had to step away from many of the family get togethers, because my family were hard drinkers and partygoers. I didn’t want that for my boys so I stayed away during those times. My boys are now in their 30’s. We’re still not drinkers. I stopped that generational trend. Unfortunately, my father died from cirrhosis of the liver many years ago, though we did get to say our goodbyes.
Most of the time our greatest enemies are our own family members.
Been there, done that (sadly).
I have walked away from the family I came from, the family that I married into and less my son, the family that I made.
Sigma: I want to take care of you. I'm successful, I have wealth and a home with space for you, all you have to do is come to me.
Family: No, we won't leave this place because we've never lived anywhere else. But you owe us, so just give us all your money.
Sigma: Click.
1000% true!!!!!
Sometimes, both people are born into families with significant family of origin issues. That ticking time bomb became apparent to me during the conflict or crisis, of whether or not to have children.
Having kids to save the broken marriage was not an option for me, despite all the guilt tripping and gaslighting.
Healing ourselves as individuals, then as a couple, was a necessary prerequisite,IMHO, before parenting.
As My partner's bio clock was ticking, divorce threats became more frequent . During/after the separation/divorce, i pursued individual and group therapy. It changed my life-i broke past historical patterns, retooled my career. All for the better.
I honestly believe a childless life was better for both of us.
It may be that we meet and mate, to contend with the archetypal issues that cause us to evolve by either converging or diverging.
Very true
I cut ties with family about 15 years ago and no way I will go back
No respect no boundaries always blame for something and my hard work money belongs to them? F no I'm out
The rest of the family might be next
The "toxic elder" thing rings true. Back in the 1990s I interviewed candidates for a position in my company. One was a young Russian man about 23. I asked him what was the biggest problem he had working in Russia. He said, "It's because in Russian culture, you have to respect your elders, and show deference even when you know they're wrong." I told him, "You want have that problem in America, because here young people think anybody older than they are is stupid. And they are not afraid to say so." He about fell out of his chair laughing and said, "I love America!"
I did it years ago with my Dad.
I thought it was just something wrong with me for not dealing with them!
It's an act of survival
POINT 2 is certainly contentious…
What you don’t understand, is the freedom that comes from following the Biblical pattern of forgiveness….of respecting your elders regardless…not being a door mat, but respecting
There is GREAT freedom in letting go and being respectful even to people who don’t deserve respect
At the same time, you don’t just doll out respect Willy Nilly, TRUE RESPECT IS EARNED….but you can still CHOOSE to act and speak respectfully, even to a total fool
ESPECIALLY your elders….THIS is the sigma way….the other description given is one of a self centred embittered sigma…who has no stoic self control
BIG DIFFERENCE !!
Blessings to all who read.
Agreed
I walked 🚶♀️ away
to see and do schön ist das
Well not all of us walked a way some are pushed a way still if you made it and survived that means you have achieved it's not easy but well worth it plus we are not alone so many of us Sigma's lone wolf's are the true winners 🏆🥇🏆 big up boys and girls.😊
All family isn't blood and all blood isn't family!
These common beliefs, like "blood is thinker than water," "respect your elders no matter what," "family is everything," "you owe me respect," are all the same! In plain English, utter BS accepted by society and society gets mad when we sigmas question it all!
Both my parents are narcissistic sociopaths, clingy & overly controlling I will be walking away from them very soon once I find work in the country where my wife lives
Idk if i can say this is a sigma characteristic vs just someone whos healthy . I mean if we want to name it sigma fine . But plenty of people get healthy , learn lessons , and implement all these things listed .
We are born alone, and we die alone. Some are under the illusion that we can expand ourselves while living with others. The reality is that everyone thinks of themselves first. Participation with others only exists where participation costs do not exceed acceptable loss. Beyond that, self-preservation clicks in, and "like everyone else," we look after ourselves. We understand that each person is responsible for themselves in reality.
I will risk my life for my brother because I place his value equal to the value I have for myself, so again I am my primary concern. His loss is not acceptable to me.
This is the way it is for everyone except masochists and those who choose to live in their heads outside of reality.
Ny family is two hours away. Love them but I will never live closer.
Not only males...
100%
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This sounds like a rebellous young generational "idiot's" excuse for why HE refuse's too value there PARENTS REARING of Good Proven VALUES! Thus,, ran away from HOME and now REGRETS being exsposed too thee enviroments of weather and abuse. And instead of falling inline is now attempting another manipulative move of; its your FAULT that poor me is isolated, hungry, cold and wet! And I am only 40 years old! How dare you cut tyes and abandon me!
You can only mock me so many times..treat me like a joke and I will leave like it's funny.
I hate those outdated mindset
Thank you. I am a Sigma female empath and I can relate to this! 💯🙏♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹😎
I wouldn't enjoy being the problem solver
God while place us in a toxic family
Nonsense
Thanks for your professional advice, champ. 🙂👍
Sorry... You're NOT a Sigma 🥶🥶🥶
Skibidi ohio
This comes across as a feel good exercise and justification for every choice a “sigma male” makes. They are fallible and imperfect just like all of the other letters in the alphabet.
Did someone leave you? Have you been hurt or are you the hurter?
@ Are you an iota male, with only an iota to offer?
Agree with it all. I look back at my five siblings & think they are pathetic.
“The family is nothing more than the first link in a chain that binds the individual to an existence of suffering." Albert Caraco.
Real
(Mattew 10:36) “And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.”
100%