GAY DOCTOR REACTS TO CONVERSION THERAPY | Psychiatry Doctor Analyzes Gay Conversion Therapy [Vice]
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 ต.ค. 2024
- #doctorreacts #conversiontherapy #vice #drelliott
Conversion therapy is still legal, and I'm pretty sure there are psychiatrists out there that are contributing to it. As a gay psychiatry doctor today, that really saddens me. This reaction video is watching a great Vice documentary on conversion therapy in America. I'm particularly interested in why people want to undergo conversion therapy, and why do people facilitate it and run these groups?
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"the parts don't fit"
"Oh, honey they do."
XD haha thank you for that!
you beat me to it!
This part made my day, was not expecting to laugh at any point in this video haha
came here to say this lol
@L Train45 ever heard of ~*fingers*~
That line had me on the floor laughing.
"Oh, honey, they do." XD
I laughed out loud at this point.
I lost it when u said that HAHAHAHA 😂😂😂
I'm so glad you brought this topic up. I too was forced to go to a Conversion therapy that was run by a Psychiatrist who was in fact a Registered Medical Practitioner. He had hounded on multiple kids like me. I am 25 now, I am studying to become a Psychiatrist myself, in the UK. The world needs better Psychiatrists and I'm going to be the person I wanted when I was a kid.
You are the type of person very much needed in our mental health system good luck to you with everything you do
@@emilyday3211 I agree
I’m so sorry you had that forced on you as a child, you deserved better. I wish you every success for the future x
I admire your resilience and your dedication to make things better so, so, so much. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for being who you are. I am so sorry you had to go through that experience, I wouldn't wish it upon anyone, but it makes me glad to see that you are the kind of person who, after having suffered personal trauma, turns it into a driver to make sure none of that ever has to happen to anyone else ever again. The world needs more people like you, and not just in psychiatry. We need more people like you who have the love and compassion it takes to make such a decision. Some people (too many, unfortunately) process their suffering by passing that suffering on to others - hurt people hurt people - but some, like you, have such compassion for others that it powers you to change things. I can't thank you enough for being who you are. I wish you all the best in your endeavors!
@@MerelvandenHurk Thank you so much for your comments. I'm feeling inspired as ever 😇❤️🙏🏻☺️
If homosexuality is a social construct, so is heterosexuality and we are all bi
Very true. We are all in the spectrum. Sometimes few of us in the respective far ends. But mostly within the spectrum.
Legitimately both religion and psychology are social constructs. Different avenues of human-created ideology use to define our humanity. Our sexual preference is much more inherent to our nature than either of those.
I'm not the least bit bi.
Women do nothing for me.
nice try, freud
Based
One of my friends was sent to conversion therapy when I was young. He tried to kill himself when he got home. He told me what happened there and it was literal torture. No exaggeration. And people wonder why I never came out to my family and haven't spoken to them in 4 years. If I had been honest with my family about my sexual orientation, I would've been in that camp right along with him.
They should be allowed to use the word therapy... there is no therapy happening in those places. I hope you and your friend are doing well now x x
Wow thats awful. Really sorry to hear that. Unfortunately I think there are many stories of that around the world that are still happening to this day
@@DoctorElliottCarthy My friend is doing well now. It's been nearly 18 years, and he's had quite a bit of time away from his family to heal. I'm grateful that it's now illegal for minors in Colorado where I am. Our governor is gay and one of his first actions was to ban conversion therapy on minors, but it's still available for adults and that makes me sad.
Hey, you're not burning down a camp, it's just good forestry...
Hint-hint...
Hey Elliot, you should do a video on autism speaks and how horrible they are. Also, they support an organization that uses shock therapy on autistic people.
That sounds like a huge trigger for me, ngl.
Yes, that would be great! As an autistic person I want to offer any and all help I can give, maybe by sharing my personal experiences with my autism or just a sounding board or whatever. Any way I can help
Omg, that's messed up.
Yep. A horrifying amount of autism 'treatment' programs are actually conversion programs. It's completely inhumane.
I hadn't heard of this WTF. Surely that would be illegal
"Oh honey, they do."
Eeeeeyyyyy. That's my guy! 😎
I know right I was like 🤘🤘🤘🤘🤟🤟🤟yesssssssssdd
Videos like this are so hard to watch but so necessary, the idea that people out there persecute others and try to mentally torture them is a horrible one to think about
It's a hard topic. I actually dont think most of these people have a malicious or sinister intent, but are probably struggling with the same issues that people go to these camps in the first place for. They're a symptom of the societal homophobia but one of many I suspect
"honey we need to talk, they fit fine"😂😂😂I'm living for this Doctor😂😂😘
Me to I laughed plus I was like I agree🤟🤟🤘🤘🤘😊😊😊😊
It seems to me that, to the extent there's more promiscuity and "one night stands" and so on in the gay community than the straight community, one of the things that contributes to that is homophobia and lack of societal support for gay long term relationships.
If you live in a society where you know you'll suffer ostracism, discrimination, legal consequences and maybe even physical harm for being gay, which was very much the case in places like the US and UK until recently (and in a lot of ways, still is), it's much safer in immediate terms to have anonymous sex with someone you'll never see again. You can hide that. It's much harder to hide a long term relationship with someone, knowing if your relationship comes out you could be disowned, lose your job, lose your home, etc.
Meanwhile, among straight couples, monogamy and long term relationships are not just accepted, but promoted and celebrated. Look at the immensely profitable wedding industry, or celebrations of couples who have been married for 50 years, and so on.
So if these people are unhappy with the amount of promiscuity in the gay community, it seems like their most effective tactic to stop it would be to celebrate gay relationships and fight against homophobia and discrimination.
Also in a gay one night stand there's no risk of pregnancy. I always thought that was something to do with it but I might just be speculating.
Not just promoted and celebrated but oppressed. As a bi male figuring out what I wanted from a life partner wasn't simple, and my family never missed a chance to prod me about how I should be getting married and starting a family as early as my teens.
I honestly think the problem is actually a little more fundamental. Literally. The UK and US have pretty puritanical views on sex and sexuality, with a strong inclination towards conservatism. The idea of people having sex solely for personal pleasure is anathema to many folks. Marriage, long-term relationships, and monogamy are the only way many people are comfortable with expressions of sex. Those industries and beliefs that surround the notion that these are things to strive for - and the implication that something is wrong with you if you can't get that or don't want it - really tell you all you need to know about how society feels about how sex should be seen. Marriage is the most important day of your life; Monogamy is sacrosanct; Long-term relationships are the most fulfilling etc. All of which you are meant to do while you are young and productive.
I think this is further compounded by the fact that to be acceptable, LGBT+ folk needs to be seen as being the same as straight people in as many ways as possible (which to me defeats the purpose of acceptance or even tolerance. For example, I may have many things in common with white folks but I don't want people to TREAT me as if I am not Black; I simply don't want to be penalized for being a Black person) to be seen as people, to begin with. So many LGBT+ folks find themselves internalizing and then shaming others for not conforming to these unexamined notions.
I think the real work is much more basic: let's recognize that there isn't anything inherently wrong with non-monogamy, sex between consenting adults should be their business alone and whatever kind of relationships consenting adults want, the only real concern should be the wellbeing of the parties involved.
I’m a bi woman who wasn’t the direct target of these sorts of things growing up, but I had to conceal the non-hetero side of my identity even from myself for most of my childhood because of a combination of internalised homophobia and having seen what non-straight-passing people in my community and in my church went through.
This kind of treatment has ripple effects. It’s indirectly destructive to closeted people, straight-passing people, and people who are trying to get a grip on what their identity is.
I'm all here for your LGBTQIA+ content, thank you so much for speaking up and educating your following! And thank you for speaking up not only on gay but also trans issues!
My pleasure. Thanks for supporting the channel 🙂
as a gay teenager i personally haven't gone to conversion therapy it was a sort of 'social conversion therapy' everyone in my school would just hammer into especially the males that me being gay was wrong and going against gods will whatever that meant. this made me 'act straight' i would be more 'masculine' i had girlfriends(who both turned out to also be gay) all in an effort to appease the bullying and fit in. lol love the UK
Sorry for bringing up an old comment, but this rings so true to me. I'm trans and didn't fully understand what I was fighting for during my younger years (since I only had the Hollywood trans identities of the 90s and early 00s to inform me, which are not actual trans identities but a demonisation of them). I too was bullied constantly for breaking the masculinity norms and being "unmanly", turns out there's a reason I didn't fit the mold. But the social pressure to conform is really destructive, even when it isn't the case of a systematic "therapy" involved. I hope you have escaped your past in the ways you need to and that you have found your life as it should be! Much love!
Also, cudos to you for helping your lesbian sisters cope - and to them for helping you. Even though we both wish it hadn't been called for.
@@lynxgoddess thank you xx
What overall makes zero sens, since you are literally born that way, so when you believe in god, it's god who created you that way.
Overall just typical nonsense from peopel who got zero clue what they are talking about.
@@miriamweller812 nice dude real coherent comment
While all aspects of the conversion "therapy" are horrendous, I find the repeated emphasis on normal/ity to be particularly awful. The assumption that there is a normal, an universal baseline, of human sexuality is ridiculously false* and automatically creates a separation between sexualities. Yet I find in most discussions around sexualities, this baseline "normality" of heterosexuality is maintained especially in discussions of inclusivity - the idea that people who had been excluded from "normal" society (e.g. heterosexual society) would want to be included back within the same society is peculiar to me (but that's just one asexual's opinion).
*not to mention a direct product of Western scientific thinking
I would highly recommend the documentary “Believer” by the band imagine dragons. It talks a lot about the Mormon church’s homophobia, and the turmoil gay Mormons go through where their religion and sexuality are at war.
Woahhh, I had no idea! I love their music!
Where can I find this documentary to stream
What pisses me off as a Native American is that there are conversion camps in places like South Dakota (where my dad’s from) home of the Lakota tribe, where the gay people were originally celebrated as me accepted. And Native parents sent there kids to said camps (especially in the late 20th century) smh 😠😡🤬😤
I'm Canadian, but both the U.S.A and Canada have a horrid history with treatment of indigenous cultures. Over the last couple years there has been a terrible uncovering of unmarked graves of young innocent children who died on Canadian residential schools and never returned to their families they were forcefully taken from. I'm not Indigenous myself. But it's not particularly the fault of the current Lakota generations for treating sexuality and gender identity the way they do. Generations upon generations of Native cultures were forced to go to schools run by both government and the Catholic Church designed specifically to turn everyone into white Christian traditions. I know there is more of a movement these days for North American Indigenous groups to reclaim the two spirit communities which was supposedly a very important and sacred understanding upon many Native tribes.
I’m literally shouting “straight people do that to” at the screen all the same times you were. It makes me so sad that people still can’t accept that love is a beautiful thing, regardless of which gender the participants are. I feel like if God really is the God of love as people say, then he would feel the same, and would bless you. ♥️
Inadequate parenting! Wow my daughter told me at 12 years old that she is gay. I guess I’m a terrible parent then!
Just because you haven't gotten a homosexual attraction doesn't mean it's a social construct. I haven't gotten a heterosexual attraction all my life and I'm not out here saying that heterosexuality is a social construct.
Have you watched the movie, But I'm A Cheerleader? It's about a conversion camp but it's really sweet and funny
The weird thing is i've heard of religious leaders Condemning people transitioning their gender while also promoting Gay conversion. It's almost like changing "who God made you" is wrong only when it doesn't align with their beliefs.
So glad to see this content. I was sent to conversion therapy at my church ten years ago this month and it was horrific. So relieved to know people are fighting against this brutal practice.
Read Dr Helminiac’s book “What the Bible really says about homosexuality” it will change your entire world view of Christianity and homosexuality. He lectured when I was at west Georgia. Basically the VAST majority of Christian scholars acknowledge that the bible does NOT oppose homosexuality.
You should react to black mirror. Specifically the episode "white Christmas" lots of psychological stuff to analyze
❤️🧡💛💚💙💜 Love your videos!
Thaaaaanks and love the rainbow hearts
The fact that this is still legal anywhere and that it is even supported by health care professionals infuriates me, thank you for being a public voice standing against awful discrimination and treatment be it people with highly stigmatised mental illnesses or people who regularly experience discrimination as a consequence of their sexual preference or gender identity. Side note I am very impressed with your alcohol collection and your restraint because most of the bottles look pretty full 😂
as a gay born in a very religious family being forced to do this bs was trully my biggest fear
i dont get why people care what others do in their bedroom. look, as long as all participants are consenting, why would anyone care. I kinda get why people dont want you to do things in public, but personally, i can look the other direction if i dont like what i see.
Being autistic, all these "cures" leave out one inportant component - does the one you want to help....actually want the help? I am very happy with my autism and even if there was a magical cure to make my brain go neurotypical....i wouldnt want to be neurotypical. I adjusted my entire life to be the way i am and while it has its drawbacks it also has its perks.
If you are gay but somehow dont want to be...well, i guess you can try changing though i doubt it works, but heck, that is no one elses business, and i am disturbed people are divided by sexuality. That said, shouldnt men celebrate others being gay? maybe its my autism but, the more men are gay, the more women are avalaiable for the heteros XD
I love your channel so much. I think a lot of people think, "Oh, we've made a lot of progress, everything is fine for gays now." But, rather than true progress, I think society has just made it unacceptable to voice and act on prejudices instead of eliminate them. Indeed, eliminating them is probably a pipe-dream, but the danger here becomes that people who think that they're not prejudiced and society is accepting become complacent. So when members of the LGBT community say, "Hey, we have a problem here. This thing isn't right," people are less inclined to be outraged at injustice and dismiss it as the fringe group that just happens to be overly vocal. In essence they think, "Oh come off it, everything is fine, there's no prejudice or stigma anymore. That's all in the past." We need a lot more things to change. In addition, perhaps, for example, things are better for kids in school now *in some places* but a lot of places in the US South are just as bad as they ever were. We can't rest on our laurels because we selectively see progress in *some* areas. We must strive for equality for ALL, EVERYWHERE.
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
Great video. Such a hard topic to discuss but oh so very important to do. Thank you!
It reminds me of a news article I read a few weeks (I think, time's weird in 2021) of the Dutch government (I'm Dutch) wanting to ban conversion therapy in The Netherlands. Even though the majority of the government agrees, the cabinet is all shady (idk the details of it, I've been very wrapped up in finishing my dissertation and preparing a proper defence to really stay up to date news-wise) about it. They were all "yeah theoretically we agree but practically it's difficult because so much of it happens under religious guises and like religious freedom and shit and we can't do anything about that". Like excuse me, yes you can. it's not "too difficult" to define these types of practices (even when they happen under so-called religious guises), that's your fucking job so go fucking do it
Also, it reminded me of all the instances that I, or any of my LGBTQIA+ friends for that matter, have walked down the street in the town where I live, just doing our thing, minding our own business, perhaps holding hands with someone (oh no, (same sex) pda am I right) and being approached by someone telling us that we need God in our lives. And then have the utmost audacity to be offended when told off. It's not nowhere near the league of the bad things that happen during conversion therapy but it is telling of how much still needs to happen and how much people can get away with under the guise of religious freedom.
Absolutely horrifying that shit like this is still in practice. Thank you for talking about it - great video and input as always 🤍 And happy pride month 🏳️🌈
hi Elliott, dont know if you have seen Boy Erased, if not it deals with conversion therapy and is based on a true story. I would love to see you react to it. Another film is Girl Interrupted but not based in conversion therapy but mental health in the 60s and is adapted from Susanna Kaysen's eponymous book about her experiences when she was in a psychiatric hospital.
When you mentioned about people who are unhappy that’s just them projecting themselves onto you is 100% true. I learned this the hard way
The one thing I would disagree with here is where you say you can be religious and gay. I was a Christian and a minister for (too many!) years and I'm afraid the Church (of England, in my case) is institutionally queerphobic. At best - and rarely - they'll allow you to exist in relative peace if you role-play as a well behaved heterosexual. As a minister, I faced almost daily homophobia from colleagues and congregation, partly, I think, because I refused to re-enter the closet. These days I tend to describe myself as a survivor of Christianity, and my advice to gay Christians is simple: run.
Can I get an amen?
Gaymen!
On this topic, Id love to see you react to Girl Defined.
I don't understand what you're complaining about. You subscribe to psychoanalytic erm .. let's call it, theory and that means that you believe that desire and behavior is shaped by early unconscious experiences, parental prohibitions, etc. These people are simply following the same idea, just not in a direction you like. It's all voluntary, anyway. "Ego-dystonic" is a legitimate clinical category.
I'd love to see your take on the movie "But I'm a Cheerleader." It's a fictional film about a teenage girl who attends a "conversion therapy" camp. It's very much a dark comedy.
to "all people are naturally heterosexual" nope...nope. We see gay animals too, theres some species that manage to survive despite a majority being gay. The INTERESTING part is, i think, that apparently more and more gay people emerge the denser the population is in an area. It almost looks like a built in balance of nature to control a population, but apparently the higher the population density in an area - human or animal - the higher the percentage of gay individuals, just as if nature said "theres too much mouths to feed so lets cut the reproduction for a bit"
- and i think that would be genius, if evolution was aware. Indeed thats a point, i, as atheist, would give towards the idea of "god created it" cause it seems very unlikely, though not impossible, that natural selection does this.
EITHER WAY - being gay is something you are born with, i dont know what area of the brain or what hormones trigger it but its certainly not a choice you are making, you feel attracted to whatever you feel attracted, cant help that. All you could do is make your own life miserable and go against your own desires, so yes having a gay relationship is kinda a conscious process that you willingly persue but who the FU*** has the right to demand others sacrifice their happyness to make themselves feel a bit more comfortable.
My suspiscion is that people that want others to be heterosexual are actually a bit gay themselves and need others to reinforce their worldview because they feel so insecure, and have a mindset of "if i dont egt to be happy no one else is either"
If you were fully heterosexual youd want MORE MEN to be gay....cause more gay men means more avalaiable women for you
10:56 The pain these people feel is terrible. They really move me. And I find it so sad that they have to get to this point. If I've learned anything, it's that the best human relationships, I mean the most significant relationships one has with other people, those that mark your life... are never sexual. I really believe that there is a serious confusion and above all an overestimation of the importance of sexuality for the full development of a person. Whether or not you are comfortable with your sexuality, none of it should cause you to suffer this much, because sexuality is but a part of the individual and no individual lives or dies in vain. Everyone is valuable and should know it. It breaks my heart that no one often tells them: Of course their lives are valuable! What's more... ¡They are invaluable! ¡Because they are human beings and human life is sacred!
Thanks for uploading the video. " can I get an amen?" amen !!!
Amen!
7:34 You are absolutely right in saying that constantly changing partners is not something exclusive to homosexuals. In fact, I have known many heterosexual men and women who suffer from this type of compulsive behavior to change partners and they all stemmed from the trauma of being abandoned by their parents. But what remains true is that if a person cannot stop changing partners, it is because something is wrong in his emotional world.
I agree that there are churches that welcome gay people with open heart. My problem though as an atheist is just that religions don’t have any evidence to backup their claims. Therefore I have zero interest in religion, not because I am gay, just because I do not think a rational person can believe in higher power, claim to care about facts but has flawed reasoning for their belief that is built on centuries old texts that lack epistemology understanding how we know something is and isn’t just because someone said so.
There's this police tv show that you should watch. It's called Perception and it's about a university professor with schizophrenia who helps his former student (an agent) solves cases. I would love your take on their depiction of schizophrenia ☺️☺️
7:45 the best part of this video. Anglican church, Waldesian Church, most of European Lutheran Churches, Old-Catholic of Utrecht Church are INCLUSIVE with all, also with women, gay, trans and queer
Hey guys does anybody else dislike this emoji:🤢🤮. I always see it in LGBTQ videos. These people always use it to call us disgusting.
I was watching a documentary about conversion therapy in the 80s and 90s. One woman who was part of such a group, identified as a lesbian before she 'changed' herself. She lost loads of friends to aids and I wonder how that impacted her and her idea of helping people 'convert' to heterosexuality! She's still married to her husband, but she's bisexual and tries to help lgbt people now in a good way
Does anyone know at what point this change occurred where pretty much all societies on earth became heteronormative? Many ancient civilizations were openly bisexual so I wonder if there is a particular time you could pinpoint and say that a change started occurring at this time.
when he describes being gay as bloody lovely it's the most English sentence I've heard
Thanks for this video. Instant subscribe from me. It needs to be said over and over again, until everybody finally gets it, that being gay is not something that needs to be fixed.
Being raised Catholic I was the most important thing is that God loves all people and I believe that God would rather have you honest and gay than lying about being straight
you should react to grand army!! particularly joeys storyline (episode 4 onwards) and Dominique’s storyline!!
4:32 A person is much more than their sexuality, that's true. That a person is homosexual does not make him less worthy or unworthy of respect, that is also true. But several things can be true at the same time.
First of all, the LGTBY Lobby also benefits financially from the suffering of homosexuals, and I am not going to say LGBTY Community because as far as I know, homosexuals from no country have come together to vote or elect them in any way as representatives, that is a title that they themselves adjudicated without permission. And you won't tell me they don't benefit financially from it.
Now, my question would be the following: What is the main purpose of sexuality? Isn't that reproduction? Isn't sex pleasurable precisely to encourage the species to reproduce? Isn't that the evolutionary goal of sexuality? So, is it true or not that homosexuality can be a biological obstacle to the reproduction of a species? And from that point of view... How can you assume that there is nothing wrong, defective or at least abnormal in homosexuality? I am not saying that the psychologists you have mentioned are right or wrong. I only ask you, is homosexuality really a normal condition of the human species or is it an abnormal condition?
If mental, physical, chemical and emotional processes are involved in sex, but it develops in a way that interferes with its normal development... is there really NO psychological or mental problem? Can you confirm this according to the scientific method?
And if there really is a problem... What's wrong with wanting to correct it? Isn't the fact that so many people seek to correct it proof that this is a necessity?
The reason I'm asking these questions is not to make anyone angry. ¡I really don't know! All the information I get about homosexuals is too vague no matter where I look. Even on the LGTBY + Lobby Web Page there is no precise definition, I repeat, "precise", of what homosexuality is. And this is an issue that has been on the table for how many years. ¡I don't understand how it is possible that we don't know more! The only thing that the media repeats to us is: Accept it as something normal and don't you dare to question it.
How is that an answer?
I personally believe that many of these people who "cure homosexuality" are indeed liars. But if they can thrive on this scam, it's largely because the psychologists, psychiatrists, and scientists who should be dealing with this condition aren't doing so. And the reasons for this are political, not scientific.
You are a gay man and a brilliant medical professional. Also, I love all your reaction videos, including this one. Please tell me what causes homosexuality and if you don't know, tell me who is investigating it.
PS: Sorry if my writing is weird, but I'm using google translate because I don't speak English.
We decide our own purposes. Some people have sex for reproductive purposes, but most sex doesn’t lead to children. Sex can also help with social bonding. If we look at our cousins the bonobos, they have sex for all sorts of reasons, with all sorts of partners, including infants. That’s nature. It just is; morality and happiness are often irrelevant. Whether something is natural or biological doesn’t tell us if it’s good or bad. We have to make that decision for ourselves.
Also, think of the clitoris. All it does is provide pleasure. It doesn’t aid in reproduction. In fact, oral sex often provides more pleasure than intercourse. Women often have better sex with women than with men. It’s called the orgasm gap.
Anyway, I’m half asleep and my thoughts are all over the place, but I hope some of that made sense.
I am 19 & I am still currently living with my parents, I have come to terms & accepted my bisexuality but for now I know to keep that to myself and friends. My parents are religious, I am not, and to tell them that I am bisexual & that I do not follow their beliefs would be setting myself up for, in my current stage of life, conflict, shame & stress. I know I won’t be accepted by them and that if I told them whilst I was financially dependent on them still - I have no doubt in my mind that they’ll subject me to similar practices in nature to conversion therapy, any and all attempts to fix me and hide me away due to embarrassment. I don’t need that shit, I won’t tell them now but in the future when I am living my own life, it will be them who has to love me and accept me as I am just as I do them, otherwise they will have no place in my life. It’s a sad truth I’ve just had to come to accept but it luckily cause me no stress or anger. I wish the best and all the love for those in a similar position, or for those who simply fear telling their parents of their non-heterosexuality. We aren’t stuck with our biological families, I love and care for mine but I know my real family is out there and I will find others who not only love and care for me but truly accept me as a person.
I'm very straight passing, mostly i have oposite sex partners, and I didn't really experienced direct homophobia. But I live in a country that is extremly homophobic, my parents accept me, kinda, but they are older people, quite conservative, traditional. I am quite vocal about my orientation and my gender (nb). But I still experience internalised homophobia. I have more of it than the external one. Not only I don't really have in my country a lot of safe spaces for queer people, I wonder how much of my not-many-female partners is me being scared of girl being actively homophobic towards me, or becoming even more obvious "enemy" of society.
Watching this is... hard. Especially as conversion therapies are still legal in my country. Recently there was proposed a project that bans Pride Parades, probably even me hanging my pride flag on my window would be seen as "demoralising".
We, as society (internationally, internet-society) came a long way, but we still have a long way to go.
I never went to conversion therapy. However, I came out to my mother as trans when I was 12 (back in 2003), and she immediately talked to her brother about it (who's a licensed psychiatrist where I live), who then talked to her about "curing" and "fixing" the problem (he's became very religious after getting his M.D). He never used the words "conversion therapy", but that's definitely what he meant. As a frightened 12 year old, I realized that I'd be better off pretending to have fixed the "problem" myself than to actually face the fact I was trans. It took me 17 years to accept what I've known to be true since then and started transitioning at 29. Conversion therapy doesn't only hurt people who undergo it, the mere notion of that existing in the first place can create years of misery all on its own.
"gay doctor", a new Ph.D.
The torture the survivors went through made me so angry - the ultimate victory was the forgiveness in his own way.
My parents sent me to a therapist that did conversion therapy on the side at 14
Thank GOD she wouldn't do it without my permission and I actually got a little bit of real help for the depression I was also facing at the time. My parents still don't accept me, but I've got the rest of my family and friends who do accept me. We need an overall ban on conversion therapy and any therapist who has that mindset needs to get a new job or learn how to actually be helpful. ❤🏳️🌈
Here from Dr. Jake to check out this video. ❤️
This is so infuriating! What lets these people think they have any right to dictate how someone should be or try to make someone believe that being gay is wrong 😡 I can’t even find the right words to express how awful the concept of ‚conversion therapy‘ is!
It all comes down to the fact that are nowhere near close to eradicating homophobia, biphobia and transphobia. Lots of work to do still!
oh honey they do you should put that on a t-shirt
Person: You liking girls is unusual.
Me: What’s wrong with unusual?
The reason LGBT+ people have more casual sex and a culture around it is because of stigma. For most of human history the only contact people could have was casual and secretive sex. Being seen with a same sex partner or dressing in stereotypically opposite gender clothing was what made you a target. It's slowly changing as acceptance rises.
That’s true. Even my country had this one park in the capital city where gays would meet at night and have a little fun in the bushes. No one knew who were the gays so they had made this place to be so if you’re a man sitting on a bench in this park at 2am you most likely are there to have fun. (Note: it is not usual for people to sit in parks at 2am here so it makes sense why they had this technique.
As much as the awareness and acceptance is rising it is still quite slow. Here it was only 53 years ago that homosexuality was still illegal… there is also this apathetic attitude among people where they think raising lgbtq awareness is ”shoving shit down their throats” and anti-lgbtq harassing is in rise. It is weird that lgbtq is referred as pandemic - a way to make gays new norm over heterosexuality, yet we are only about 10% of the world population.
Pride has still lots of work to do so this apathetic attitude can be fixed. Our so callied ”allies” can say shit like ”I don’t care if you’re gay or not. Just don’t shove it down out throats” which is still this history long problem with gays only being allowed in private. That needs to change for real.
I can't believe a registered psychologist is this open about his bigotry against queer people after every peer-reviewed study that's against his view.
Does corticosteroid help tension headache ?
The man with the red mowhork had me crying
The episodes of House where he is in a psyc ward would be great.Season 6, Episodes 1 and 2.
I know I'm coming to this late, but that one statement that we are "physically, anatomically designed for the opposite sex" made me physically recoil. As an ace woman, hearing someone say and genuinely believe that I'm "designed for" men is massively unsettling on so many fronts.
Reducing anyone to disconnected body parts as though they are the sole purpose for our existence can never lead anywhere bad, right? /s
Hey, found your channel from the Bojackhorseman analysis and so glad to find out you're a fellow LGBTQ!
Love your content, I'm fortunate enough to have pretty good mental health but whenever I feel stressed your videos help me feel better :)
I have twelve words about this psychologist in the video, "Gambler's Fallacy"
"What is your greatest fear this weekend?"
Getting eaten by a bear
I hadn't heard that Alan chambers had come out. Every time I had seen him interviewed he came off as the most closeted man. On one level I'm glad that he finally acknowledged who he is but it's disappointing that his zeal was ultimately meaningless.
“I’m a big fan of Vice.” Aren’t we all.
I appreciated the comment on being able to find a church that accepts gay members. Go to any Unitarian Universalist Church and there is an accepting community for atheists, believers of any religion, as well as members of the LGBTQ+ community. The UU Churches officially recognized and performed gay weddings in the US as early as 1974. They are extremely welcoming.
My first boyfriend was sent to conversion therapy by his parents soon after we secretly dated when we were 15 and it basically ruined his life and he fell heavily into heroin use for like a decade. I was so angry at his parents.but could do nothing about it
As an individual that has extended relationships with both genders and solidarity. I found people on both sides tend to lash out because of their own unhappiness, fears and inadequacies.
The idea that people have to identify as a group instead of individuals only makes this worse. Groups have history if becoming immovable while an individual can become disconcerting.
I know Brazil has a very advanced LGBT+ rights but knowing it is still possible in UK is mind blowing. I didnt expect much from USA though.
Oh sweetheart, I love you, thank you. Im not clinical but I do work in the health service. I ran a focus group a little while ago and one of the comments was "I don't have poor mental health; I have poor mental health because the world won't allow me to be trans". That really stuck with me. Also, which you may appreciate... "How many trans people does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but you need seven clinicians to confirm that the room is dark." 😁 Keep doing what you're doing, my lovely. 😘
I talked to my previous therapist about my experiences with homophobia (I'm bi) and a couple of times she said: "Yes unfortunately this is how things are for now in our country but all people should be tolerated and understood." So I just assumed that she was at the very least not homophobic. But one time she said that this is a choice (being gay) that should be respected and I corrected her and said that it is actually not, people would not choose out of nowhere to be gay exactly because of the things you might experience. People just are. And imagine she goes:" Well a survey/research from not long ago concluded that only 6% of gay ppl are actually born that way and all the rest have become that way bc of trauma or sexual frustration. And at that moment I cannot believe what I heard, my eyes start to water a lil bit and I go: How did they concluded that, based on what, how do you measure that, how did they go from point A to p B...and she's like: I dunno...
I quit her the next day
Eugh that's awful. Sorry you had to experience that.
I just realized how much booze you‘ve standing around on your shelf. A man after my heart
But they're all full bottles so really, it demonstrates very good self control 🤣
@@DoctorElliottCarthy as well as demonstrating optimism: you‘re probably planning for the first post covid house party 👯 🥂🍻
Thank you for these videos. Would also love to hear your take on Applied Behaviour Analysis (ABA) ‘therapy’ for Autistic folks as it was founded by the same person as conversion ‘therapy’ (Ole Ivar Lovaas) and both based on behaviourism. The ‘science’ behind ABA is questionable at best as all reporting is based on parent, teacher, or practitioner reports rather than on experiences of Autistic folks themselves (most of whom characterize ABA as abusive and, in some cases, torture - not dissimilar to conversion ‘therapy’ tactics) and behavioural changes are highly context bound (meaning they only occur in the same context in which they were ‘trained’). I would love to hear your take on this aspect of neurodiversity and the harm that continues to be perpetrated by ABA & organizations that condone it, like Autism Speaks. Love your videos and your compassionate & inclusive take on mental health! ❤️
Hey Elliot, there was an episode on the most recent series of Call The Midwife where a young gay man struggling with his sexuality goes to a gay conversion therapy place. So sad and also set in the 60s when homosexuality was still illegal. Might be worth checking out :)
Great shout. Thanks a lot for the tip!
Specifically 1966. Spoilers.
The man had been avoiding getting treated for something on his back out of fear of the doctor realising he was gay because he'd been working as a prostitute but the call the midwife doctor and nurse try to tell him it's okay to be gay, then rescue him from the place he ran away to when they realised he'd gone there.
Interesting how that one guy completely absolves himself of any acknowledgement of his part in conversion therapy.
"We don't think that there's anything wrong with people who are happy being gay" okay... so why 'reparative' then? That strongly suggests brokenness.
It's times like this I'm glad I turned out bi. The worst I seem to get is being accused of not existing. But I do feel a weird shame about the gay part of me, and I know I shouldn't. It's mental really, because my friends and family would be very supportive if I had a boyfriend, but I don't know, I think there's some weird idealisation about the 'other sex' that got buried in me when I was young and I can't get it out. Also I'm an introvert and camp men are intimidating lol. Just rambling/sharing my experience over here.
Love your videos, very informative and you seem like an awesome guy. You probably know this but Wales just announced a ban on conversation therapy so hopefully the rest of the UK will follow suit
Being part of the lgbt+ is illegal where i am from but that doesn’t stop me from being who i am
Best wishes, be careful out there! ❤️
1:44 - 2:10 "You're worth more than what you can give to other people. You deserve love too."
- Mara, She-Ra and the Princesses of Power
6:38 That line cracks me up.
Weirdly, that whole "caused by prenatal intrauterine hormones" thing actually *still* has an immense degree of currency in trans theory, often most strongly espoused by trans people ourselves, as a sort of "born this way" rhetorical tactic. To me, it comes across as internalized transphobia mixed with an attempt to justify our validity on cisnormative terms. I think those of us who lean into that theory (often to the point of wildly exaggerating its degree of scientific evidence) believe, on some level, that if our brains were structurally aligned with our lived and identified genders, with some kind of identifiable physiological cause, this would make us somehow more "real", more like cis people. But it is, ultimately, conceding ground to the cisnormative concept that *biology* gets the final and definitive say in our identity and the legitimacy of our gender. Simply shifting that idea from urology / gynecology / genetics over to (hypothetical) neurology isn't actually challenging or moving past those cisnormative ideas. Ultimately, it is irrelevant if people are or aren't born trans / cis / gay / straight., or if it has a physiological cause. What matters is simply that we *are*, and that's not going away. Ultimately, it is irrelevant whether or not it is a choice to be trans, or to transition, or to be gay or bi, or to engage in same-sex intimacy. It's a choice we should absolutely have the right to make.
I've been grabbed by the shoulders and shaken and asked why I just cant pretend to be " normal " like everone else as a child. This happened when I was around seven. I had a headache gor a week and bruising. I was doing my best to pretend I was like everyone else. I though it was appropriate to hide when I got hurt, where I was different, and if anything was wrong.
I appreciate this video. We've got to get more info available. Masking is toxic and increases likelihood of victimization. We need access to care, compassionate educated care.
I literally just binged your videos lol. I was wondering if you would react to scenes from the office. I think it would be pretty humorous.
I have a grandfather who was married to a woman his entire adult life, he struggled with alcohol and drug abuse trying to self-medicate to deal with his PTSD from fighting in Vietnam. At some point he became a pornography addict, he would spend inordinate amounts of time searching for pornography of all kinds, gay, straight, and...other things that are uncomfortable to mention. For what it's worth he did go to jail...but when confronted about it, all he could say is, "Oh, I'm not gay, I swear," and in spite of us telling him that we don't care if he's gay, straight or otherwise, he just kept trying to reinforce the idea that he had no attraction to men. I feel like this is a lot more common in older men right now, men from a generation where the world was far harsher on the gay community. I often wonder if perhaps this was something he had been struggling with, and if maybe he had learned to accept his homosexuality/bisexuality/whatever may be the case, if he wouldn't have gone down the horrible path he did while trying to suppress those feelings.
I'm a British gay dude and I have seen this doc, it's infuriating and it's nearly all religion based.
Here is a thought experiment: I don't know but let's assume that God exists and think about the nature of that being. Omnipotent, knowing all at all times and created the Universe - a region so utterly vast where there are more stars in it than grains of sand on every beach on the planet. Yet this being cares about what one insignificant species does with it's sex organs? These things are cults.
BTW how much booze is on your shelf lol
Some mental health professionals also think something is wrong with single people . Not married? You can’t be happy.
I think when he said "the parts don't fit" he means "when put together the parts don't make a baby" which is, in my opinion, a bad way to think about hetero cis sex too. The fact that he said it in the most convoluted way possible (maybe because of some sort of shame...?) and therefore invalidating the sentence for me it's just hilarious
I came far too close to killing myself because of conversation therapy. I felt utterly hopeless with no way out. 3 other guys in my group succeeded. I came out instead.
"The parts simply dont fit" "Oh honey they do!" killed me
You’re an amazing psychiatrist, you are a blessing to those who need help, thank you!!!
Lol. Oh honey the parts do fit. YES THEY DO! Quite snugly!😂
Aversive stimulus is literally just trauma. You’re creating such a strong negative association that the person does everything in their power to avoid reliving that experience. That’s trauma