Fun Fact: The kiss was actually unscripted, the Oscar actor just went with it, so you see everyone in the room's genuine reaction just like the viewer's.
Hi Dr.Elliot I absolutely love the office, thanks for this! Someone suggested reacting to the episode “safety training” where they talk about depression in the workplace. Another episode that I think is great is “counseling” where Michael has a therapy session with Toby. Love your content ❤
How I felt when he told Oscar “Go ahead and come out, however you want”? Horror, because the situation is so awkward for Oscar, like being pantsed by a child, whose parents’ favor you are currying.
Definitely Sense8! The sense of connection and the bond the characters share regardless of sex, gender identity, sexual orientation, skin colour, religion, past traumas, etc. made me feel like I could be accepted for who I am, if I just found the right people and the courage to be fully me
It wasn't exactly an awakening for me in terms of figuring out my orientation, but that series is absolutely wonderful & I'd even say it can give us a different kind of awakening in our humanity in general. I really loved Sense8, I rewatch it on occasion, one of my favourites for sure
Watching Cardcaptor Sakura made me feel so seen as a bi guy. The key part was Sakura's love interest also having a crush on her own crush, or her older brother being very clearly bi. I thought they were SO cool, the way a little boy does, and seeing them feel things I felt made me feel reassured in a way that stayed with me for years.
Also bi guy here and I feel that. I was so disappointed when they explained away Syaoran's attraction to Yukito as Syaoran's sensitivity to Moon magic. In my heart he shall always be bi... I also didn't care for the way they rushed Sakura falling for Syaoran. We had over a season to see Syaoran falling for her, but only an episode or two for the other side? Ugh.
I'm trans, and gay. I have shame around it and confusion. I also am afraid cis gay men would never accept me. Especially currently, as I am not fully medically transitioned. I've only had 1 cis man hit on me as if I was just a regular guy... we were in the psych ward though so weird circumstances. I have not told my family to consider me gay even though I am out as trans... It's all very messy.
As a cis gay man, it's possible gay men might not want to date a trans guy, but there's also gay men who put it their Grindr bio, "no fats, femmes, or blacks. Just a preference!" Consider it a bullet dodged. The best comment I've heard is that there's a difference between being attracted to men and being attracted to penises. Personally, I'd date what I'm hesitant to call a "pre-op" trans guy. Because personally I don't think everyone needs or wants bottom surgery. Just my 2 cents.
I think there can be a lot of toxicity in different circles. While sure, there are preferences, there are also men who don't care, who are pan, who are demi, who have a preference for trans men (though I don't know if that is really where you want to go). But a lot of the toxic stuff is that gold star gay shit, which I believe they consider a pre-bottom surgery trans man to count, because the "platinum gay" (i think that is what they call themselves) is someone who wasn't even delivered vaginally, they were born via c-section. I'm a bi cis woman, so I am mostly jist thrown into the many debates surrounding all this vs experiencing it, but I have a lot of trans friends. However, even as a woman I have had a gay man proposition me for sex, because I "only had sex like a gay man with tits" at the time. So there are definitely people out there for you, and I don't think it will even need to come with more transitioning (though, realistically that always increases chances). The more you feel ok as you, which is hard as it is, the easier it is going to be to find others. You're gonna do great ❤
I was outed to my extremely homophobic and conservative family by someone who I definitely should have been able to trust. I found out years later, and I felt SO unsafe, and it hit me like a fucking wall. The person said "why should you care if people know?" and just could not care to understand why coming out is a big deal and my choice. The fact that I was outed to the people I was... that made it so much worse.
“Why don’t you want everyone to know against your will? aRenT u pRouD?? U hAvE a whOlE moNtH aFterAlL!!” But to be serious for a second, I’m really sorry that happened to you:(
First, that absolutely horrific. I'm sure that was a frightening experience. It's also caused a lot of teen suicides in the 1980s. I hope you know you are loved. There needs to be some type of legislation or law written holding severe penalties for that happening. Especially, if it puts you in an unsafe environment! I'm so sorry that happened to you. Mean people suck!
So I grew up crushing hard on extremely fem cartoon characters, which looking back the sapphic vibes are really obvious - but because I'm a grey ace I've never really felt that inspirational moment connecting with media until I was an adult - Todd's arc in BoJack Horseman was the very first time I watched something and went "OH! That's like me!!" and it hit me like a ton of bricks that representation meant so much to me. I didn't know what I was missing out on until that moment, so Todd will always have a special place in my heart. I'd really like to see more healthy ace representation out there.
My wife likes to pick on me for my very specific and narrow form of gaydar. She has noticed a trend in the women I find attractive. They are almost always bi/pan. It's even like "oh I used to have a crush on that actress when I was younger" and she'll laugh because it'll turn out they later came out as bi. Specific example is Michelle Rodriguez. As you might have guessed, my wife is bi.
Glad e got you acknowledging the R slur and medicines part in that term being used towards any and all disabilities. Once again you’re the most based psychiatrist I’ve experienced so keep it up.
I love that Dwight also learned a lesson in the end! I have the same feeling for Dwight as you do for Micheal - he’s also naive and his goal is always about surveying for information about the betterment of the office
As the Pride in London start line manager, whose job it is to count all the people participating as they cross the start line. We have 30,000 participants in 600 groups, 1000 volunteers and 1.5 million visitors. Btw I just realised I'm on the banner on the PiL page. The purple haired wheelie with my blue haired partner leaning in. My favourite show was DS9. It would be 20 years until i realised why i connected with Jadzia!
In the movie "Bringing Up Baby" (1938) there's a scene with Cary Grant wearing Katherine Hepburn's peignor (due to screwball circumstances). A woman arrives at the front door and is confused. A frustrated Grant says "I went suddenly GAY this morning!"
I know it's cheesy and not the best representation, even for its time, but as a kid who grew up in a fundamentalist household, being able to sneak in some episodes of Queer as Folk (US) really changed my perspective on queer people in general, and helped me come to terms with my own Bisexuality.
Pride is still a protest here, in Hungary, and it's sad we need it. We luckily don't face a Russia-level systematic discrimination... yet. We're sloooowly getting there. The anti-LGBT measures are just the same as in Russia, only with a few years of delay. As for queer media that influenced me: the first gay series I've ever seen is an anime called Given. Made me understand a lot of stuff about myself (I'm bi), and also made me fall in love with rock music.
6:00. I know someone who was ashamed because he had always wanted kids. He didn't like the idea of not having his own or even raising kids with a two-father household. He had a lot of self-resentment for that. I don't know where he stands now as far as kids are concerned, but I guess things have improved somewhat. He finally introduced his boyfriend to his family last year and they now live together
Seeing the film Philadelphia was definitely a formative thing for me in how I see the LGBTQ+ community (I'm straight, but it came out when I was 12 or 13 so right as I was starting to mature and get a fuller view of the world at large), but honestly, Queer Eye (the original run) was maybe the most impactful for me, even if I think the new version is leaps and bounds better because, as much as I love the original cast, it felt like they were trying to caricaturize them a bit and lean into stereotypes a little more. It definitely had a big impact when I was watching a later season episode that featured a trans man, and I realized about five minutes in, it was a high school classmate of mine (who, incidentally, gave me one of the best compliments I've ever received when we peer-reviewed each other's papers freshman year in English class, and you know it must have been good because I'm 43 and still remember the exact phrasing he used).
Please Like Me! Beautifully crafted autobiopgraphic story of Josh Thomas, a gay comedian who later on got an autism spectrum diagnosis. The series explicitly deals with mental health and complicated relationships, growing up gay and the beauty of life. Every episode is named after a meal that is prepared during the opening credits to a song called "I'll be fine" The character of Josh was the only character on TV I felt truly represented by as a teenager. When the actor shared his diagnosis, it got me interested in neurodivergence. Which was an important development step for me, let's just say that
At the time of that episode, I was following a lot of queer websites because I had a lot of quee friends. Towleroad got mad because Oscar Nunez described the kiss as awkward and thought he was saying kissing another man was awkward.
Being a kid in the 90's was weird... Everyone's Kryptonite was being called gay... but the actual gay kid in the corner talking about Aaron Carter with the girls wasn't picked on. This feels like a bunch of teenagers trying to prove they aren't gay...
I'm not gay, but there are some queer shows that I like. Mostly anime though like "Sasaki and Miyano" and my personal favorite "given". It's really fun watching them not knowing what to do. They tried to convince themselves that they aren't queer, but everyone watching knows that they definitely are. Making the moment where they actually get together even more precious to watch.
from an autistic person, my head cannon is Michael Scott's autistic, or at very least neurodivergent in some way. in a way it's also through counter transference. I find, though I was late diagnosed, the people who made me cringe the most, to the point i couldn't watch them were coded autistic. plus, michael just reads everything soooo wrong.
Matt Baume does a great job of exploring gay representation in popular media, and many of the well-intentioned "progressive" depictions from '70s and '80s TV he has looked at could give Michael Scott a run for his money in terms of cringe-factor, but I still think one of the first to do it got it right; Billy Crystal, playing 'Jodie', in 'Soap'.
I am one of those who thinks Will & Grace is really way too loud, but it is just the 2 exuberant characters who aggressively overshadow the needs of those around them. In real life I find gay people to be just as self-aware as straight people, and maybe even more so since they lack the entitlement of being "standard". I think my gaydar comes down to recognizing when people have their guard up, and the relief in their demeanor when I mention my ex-girlfriend.
As someone who was outed, I freakin' hate Michael outing Oscar. The kiss is positively painful. The word "queer" used to be hurled at me like a dagger. I take pride in reclaiming it as my label.
There's a deleted scene where Oscar says he tried to come out to Michael in his interview but Michael thought he was joking...and that's the only reason he didn't come out at the office.
I am SO excited for you to start looking at episodes of the office (US). It's all-time favourite show and there are so many amazing episodes. The counseling episode where Toby tries to counsel Michael is excellent, the relationship between Michael and Jan (especially episode Dinner Party) is absolutely worth looking at, and Creed as a human being is... a lot 😂
I was still (technically) a teenager when Moonlight, Call Me By Your Name, Sex Education and the Spanish TV series Elite came out. They really gave me the boost I needed to come out. When I was younger I also remember the conversation around Milk and Brokeback Mountain. I grew up in Ecuador where homophobia IS still a big deal, but having the most talked about TV shows and movies depicting well rounded portrayls of LGBT people does go a long way.
14:15 While the Sexual Offences Act 1967 was passed in the UK, but it didn't apply to the whole of the UK, only England and Wales. Scotland and Northern Ireland's updates came later. In the case of NI, it took the involvement of the ECHR via the Dudgeon case. That was an important case here in Ireland (Republic), as it was cited when Norris went through the same process with the ECHR.
I definitely think gaydar is a thing, but mostly for other queer people. The vast majority of the time I wouldn't be able to tell you HOW I know, it's just an overall vibe, usually before my brain has even had time to do any conscious evaluation. Sometimes there are concrete things I can point out that reinforce my hunch, but usually I just...know. I don't think I've ever had somebody come out to me and I hadn't already suspected.
re: your very first point, about the f-slur originally being about women: I think a lot of people would be surprised to learn how consistent this actually is! Many of the "historical" derogatory terms for gay men were not necessarily about homosexuality at all, they were often words very specifically referring to someone who is on the, shall we say, receiving end of sexual acts. It was, for a very long time, seen as degrading for a man to be in what was seen as a submissive sexual position, because it was like being a "woman." Homophobia and misogyny are ugly cousins ):
The first depiction of homosexuality I ever saw on TV was the American TV series "SOAP". Billy Crystal played a gay man. There was some stereotyping, but the humor was directed at the stereotyper (not a real word?), not at Billy Crystal's character. As best I can recall. That was probably 50 years ago now.
I am LGBT Gen X and DEEPLY resent the word Qu*r and the word D*ke. Every time I hear it, no matter who says it, I feel it like a hammer to the heart. I fully realize that is oversensitivity on my part, but it is what it is.
I didn't realize I was queer until 19, I grew up thinking what I felt (demisexuality and nonbinary) was something humans felt in general. I thought everyone else felt sexual attraction the same way and had times they inexplicably felt genderless. Until I came across a, "what asexuality are you" OKCupid quiz- had no idea what asexual was. Then I discovered nonbinary not long after because I went to a year-long hyper-fixation on gender and sexualities ADHD used to be called: Brain-injured Brain-damaged Clumsy child syndrome Minimal brain dysfunction Nervous (a "nervous child") Organic brain disease
for a long time my gaydar was so bad, after spending some time around gay men ive realised that men who present themselvs in a flamboyant manner (aka power bottoms) are the only ones you can tell are gay from looking at them. For the others you would need to talk to them and get an understanding of their pop culture references and their interests before being able to tell without asking. For me as a woman, most of the time i know because i dont feel like theres a chance they will hit on me, aka i can relax around them. Its obviously not all men though but thats how i figure it out. Gay men are usually pretty clued in to human rights or womens issues way more then hetero men, aka they can recognise misogyny way faster whereas hetero men go cave man brain about it.
I know the f-word is awful to hear for a lot of fellow queer people, but even as someone who has many times been on the sharp end of that word, I cannot stop myself from laughing at Michael Scott saying "faggie" and then feeling bad about it. Like any other slur or variation of a slur wouldnt have worked. It's just perfect. I love this episode. It honestly did a hell of a lot to ease network audiences' wariness about "the gays." Like, I prefer my workplaces with NO sa obvs, but in a sitcom, it's nice to see the aggressor being the cishet normative one.
Degrassi was a great show that I grew up with awesome Trans/non-binary rep. Adam Torress, played by Jordan Todosey - played a trans guy. The actress I watched from a prior show - resonated with me prior to coming out as first non-binary, and then also trans. Similar, Yael - first non-binary character. I very much appreciate from a teens perspective - really dealing with those issues and I feel really was the gateway show for other tv shows to follow I think too many shows are trying to exclusively get gay/trans people to play gay/trans characters. Sometimes, I think it is appropriate but I do not think trans/gay people need to exclusively play gay/trans characters. Sure, if it historically makes sense - than sure, getting certain people - especially when it makes sense from a racial/ethnical perspective, but as a trans asian, I dont need every trans person on tv to be played by a trans person. But that's just me. So long as the role is played authentically - than that works for me.
Back in the 90s, when I was at university, I used to love to spend time just browsing the school's massive research library. The university had both a medical school and an engineering school I one time came across a very old book on the shelf, from the early 1900s, titled, The Care and Treatment of Idiots and low-Grade Morons, or something to that effect. I was shocked by the title but I realized these were once medical terms but as soon as they enter the common lexicon they become insults that can no longer be used in medicine. I believe an "idiot" was someone who today would be classified as non-verbal and low-functioning, such as incapable of feeding themselves, using a toilet, etc. A moron would be a person more ambulatory and verbal but in the case of "low-grade" needing constant care and supervision. This was a book about how to take care of the more severe cases usually found in mental institutions.
It's not specifically a queer show but Degrassi had a big impact for me. I was in high school at the time so I could relate to some of the stuff they were going through in general but also seeing gay people in the show helped make it so relatable for me. Seeing the struggles they went through with accepting their sexuality, with being scared to come out, and being terrified of people finding out. I was so worried my family would find out I watched the show and would have the volume low and sit right in front of the tv so I could hear it but no one else could. But seeing Riley and Zane's relationship in the show really had an impact on me.
Wasn't heterosexuality in the same "seminal " text also defined as deviant because it meant something like single people in multiple non-procreative relationships?
I fought the gayness in me because I didn't want to be even more different being autistic was enough and didn't want to give the bullies another reason for going after me. I don't think I have gaydar. I do have wishyouaregaydar and it often does not work ;)
I weirdly grew up mainly encountering gay rep from the 1950s and 1960s - William Burroughs and Round The Horne. I think I liked gay rep in shows like Ab Fab and Gimme Gimme Gimme and Six Feet Under because even bit parts felt less like representation and more like characters in a story with a purpose.
Your point about being gay *being* the joke nails why Dave Chapelle is so unfunny now even though I think he used to be hilarious. It's totally possible for jokes to be about the trans experience and be funny, but (since he knows nothing about that experience) that's not what his jokes are, being trans is always the punchline and even aside from how childish it is to intentionally try to offend people, not to mention to constantly complain about being "canceled" while releasing multiple specials that are doing very well, the jokes are just lame because of it.
Best queer show I’ve seen and means so so much to me is Our Flag Means Death and to about pirates The representation there is so great there’s no such thing as even having to come out it’s just all normalized without making it look forced
im back Elliott.... where are youre plants Elliott.....Where are the plants Eliiott! Did you water them, or did you let the dryout! Where ARE THE PLANTS!?!?!?!
I would love love love for you too analyze some of Six Feet Under as that was the formative portrayal of gay characters on TV i first saw. I mean i guess before that i saw Ross's ex wife on Friends and knew gay people existed... my mom watched Will & Grace and i saw it in passing. But nothing quite as sympathetic and in-depth as Six Feet Under which was really not afraid to show what it feels like to be gay in a society that still has a lot of homophobia, to be gay and religious, to be gay and in a very masculine career (Keith is a police officer) etc etc. I may have seen the Desperate Housewives arc someone else mentioned first too. Andrew being gay and how Bree handles it would be so fun to see your reaction to too. But i don't think i learned as much from that. Btw i was asexual (and gray-panromantic, dating people of any gender but without kissing etc) all along. I then got into Skins UK partially because of Emily/Naomi and then watched the very queer shows of Glee and The Fosters and got really into them. I crave a lot of queer media in my life. Faking It was weirdly compelling. Love, Victor was actually really good and unique in many ways. Etc etc.
I know it's by far not the same, but I heve severe chronified eating disorder (and other mental health issues). After my parents divorce when I was 15 years old we had no contact with my father for over a decade. The eating disorder had developped after the divorce. It was initially me who after all that time took a step towards my father again, and my sister "joining in" after a while. He knew nothing about my issues, and my sister blackmailed me into "coming out" to him (by telling she would deny every contact with him if I did not and then would have to tell him why she did). I was not ready. It was terrible... I understand it was not all easy for her either, but that does not make the distress I felt any less. I don't want to disregard any of the queer experience whatsoever (I'm also ace, almost nobody knows). I just imagine it might feel similar, since there is so much shame and feelings of guilt coming with my issues. I may be all wrong with that. And exactly because my sister and father are pretty judgemental and let's say "rainbow flag phobic" and ridiculing, I have not and most likely will not out me as ace towards them. I'm not begging to be hurt even more. Anyway, for whatever the reason might be, I can relate to the devastating pressure of giving away sth very pesonal and sensitive to others when you are not ready, not comfortable with, and being forced to by someone else.
Every time I watch this episode, certain scenes make me so uncomfortable. Just like Oscar is while they’re in the meeting room. You can also see that everyone else is horrified and on Oscar’s side of the situation. Just look at Meredith’s face.
Watching this makes me realize how autistic I am, I thought the Angela was saying that will and grace was too loud as in volume, didn't realize you were gay, I believed Oscar when he said he wasn't, and I was momently confused why he lied, I didn't pick up on the HR guy being honest about outing Oscar until he said it like three times, and I thought Oscars Boyfriend was his roommate for wayyy to long.
Growing up in the 90s, everyone I knew said gay as a way to describe something lame. But it was never a hate word against gay people, we didn't even know anyone who was gay. Words are weird
Being a gay person who grew up in the 90s, yes, it absolutely was used disparagingly towards anyone who was even suspected to be gay, or even to straight boys if someone wanted to insult them. But people also said f****t rampantly back then.
Oh the Queer rep in shows and movies angle: I definitely watched the usuals like Queer as Folk, but I saw things like Oz sooner, but I connected more with movies and shows where being gay was just part of the characters and it was "allowed" to be shown as 'normal', not hidden, not "uniquely" celebrated. The movie Go sticks out to me a lot with Jay Mohr and Scott Wolf and they are just two actors dating and bickering with each other over petty issues and it wasn't different from a bickering petty straight male/female couple. It wasn't "who was top or bottom", it was "there's a problem or drama and we need to fight it out and be just as immature." I will say that The Office is often a show I avoid watching because I can't deal with the cringe. I love Parks and Rec and other "Office-style" shows, but not the Office.
I'm queer (& use that word with the most positive connotation). As for lgbt shows... Oh, gosh, I could not watch the L-word (only recently saw the 1st season) because it was too melodramatic, soap-opera kind of drama constantly, but I can understand why it was groundbreaking at the time. The shows I did like were Will& Grace and Queer as Folk (the US version - I know there's a previous UK version that's great, but unfortunately I never saw it), then I started watching a lot of other LGBTQ content (films mostly - there are some truly wonderful ones, especially in the last 10 years as we have moved away from the need to have gay characters always end up tragically). These days, I'm also glad to have discovered the so-called "bl-series" from Asia. There's quite a lot of them now and like in any "industry" there are some problematic ones or, again, too melodramatic &sappy for my taste, but then there are some ABSOLUTE GEMS . Yes, representation matters, though I enjoy watching stuff that reflects other queer experiences (for instance, I may not be trans or a gay man, but I will enjoy a good story where the main protagonists live those experiences). I am also drawn to queer content because I'm kind of fed up with all the hetero content. For every queer story, there's a thousand hetero stories and after a while, most of them are pretty much the same, it gets boring lol. Good to have some diversity in what we watch or read!
I've realised something, when I watched this episode. Please correct me, if this thought is somewhat stupid. You have a right to be oblivious or ignorant about the knowledge of other people's individual traits. The only thing, I want you to make sure, you did right, is to ensure, that everyone in your company is feeling physically and mentally safe around you (that means, try to modify your behaviour towards the others, when you see clear signs of distress; and if you don't know what to do - just ask them what seems to be the problem, what can I do to help; that's it).
As a straight dude, i find myself wanting to hang out with gay guys more than straight ones. I think its because dude - dudes, well, ya cant really talk to them about things in ways that straight dudes would fifd uncomfortable, its like talking to a straight dude about dude issues, but talking about it to and with a dude that isnt going to break your balls over it or dismiss what you say or how you feel, or even simply just shut down and act like it was never brought up. Trying to talk to my straight friends about how im feeling about the stresses of work and bills and the expectations that my family has of me, they just say , "Yeah, i know, it sucks." you know dude stuff, which i get it. Im a dude, but this is why i say it nice to sometimes talk to gay dudes about stuff like that, cuz they still get what its like to be a man, but they are less inclined to have a guarded outlook on the conversation. I dunno, its hard to explain. Its kinda like, youd figure, coming from a straight dudes perspective, that a dude on dude relationship would be perfect at times. I imagine it would be like dating and living with your best bro, dont gotta argue about food stuff, or gaming too much, i bet you can both watch the game, your wardrobe doubles if you are the same size, all good things right? .... It makes more sense, two dudes doodlin, and dating rather than two girls, dudes would just like, bro out. Right? The only issue i would have with it all would be when push came to shove and cloths started comeing off, betwixt the steamy fold of sheets i dare not go with my bro lol... But wait, then thats just two straight dudes living together, isnt it?... see, this is the issue, this is all from a straight guys perspective, so of coarse its gonna make sense when i look at it that way lol im just saying, me and by guy friends get along blissfully without women around, sure, we dont have tickle fights and cuddle either, and dont talk about personal stuff lol but other than that its stress free, as oppose to dating a woman, like 90% of the time. What can i say, i love women, well... parts of them. The squishy soft parts. The talking, nagging, annoying parts...those parts suck. guess its a double edged sword.
@@blustery_tabletop Ya win some, ya lose some. lol I think i was just taking yall along with me on my roll coaster of random thought i have when i should be paying attention at work.
It's almost more strange to me that everyone isn't pan. I have a terrible gaydar, I think, because I naturally assume everyone is pan or bi or any other variation and I have to stop and think like "is this person really lgbt+ or are they cishet?"
Another thing about having Michael being a bumbling idiot is how it means the show can tackle what would otherwise be a somewhat heavy subject (homophobia) somewhat serious. While still being relatively lighthearted. If a serious show had to make this episode tackling these same problems (using slurs, outing people) youd have to be angry at people in the episode.
Personally, i don't think there's a meaningful distinction between using the term mental retardation and intellectual development disorders. The main problem i have is that its obviously the connotation of the word the professionals are trying to avoid, but slur tends to follow slang, so eventually some derivations of "disorders of intellectual development" will be used in the pejorative, its nothing more that kicking the can down the road.
This episode was always so cringy and difficult to watch. 😬 Your evaluation of it was great. Being outed at work would be terrible. Watching the show as an adult, I see how much therapy Michael Scott needs
Fun Fact: The kiss was actually unscripted, the Oscar actor just went with it, so you see everyone in the room's genuine reaction just like the viewer's.
That’s amazing 😂😂
i heard he won an Oscar for it as well.
Actors staying in character to “genuinely react” isn’t a genuine reaction
This was light on Psych commentary but heavy on the history so definitely appreciate that
Hi Dr.Elliot I absolutely love the office, thanks for this! Someone suggested reacting to the episode “safety training” where they talk about depression in the workplace. Another episode that I think is great is “counseling” where Michael has a therapy session with Toby. Love your content ❤
or the episode “grief counseling” when Michael talks about his loss of his boss and insist everyone attend grief counseling
Bree's relationship with Andrew on Desperate Housewives was probably one of the first major storylines that I can remember and was it a wild ride.
How I felt when he told Oscar “Go ahead and come out, however you want”? Horror, because the situation is so awkward for Oscar, like being pantsed by a child, whose parents’ favor you are currying.
Oh a psychoanalysis of Michael Scott? We’re in for a treat! 😀
Definitely Sense8! The sense of connection and the bond the characters share regardless of sex, gender identity, sexual orientation, skin colour, religion, past traumas, etc. made me feel like I could be accepted for who I am, if I just found the right people and the courage to be fully me
That show does not get the recognition it deserves
Seconding this! Such a good show.
It wasn't exactly an awakening for me in terms of figuring out my orientation, but that series is absolutely wonderful & I'd even say it can give us a different kind of awakening in our humanity in general. I really loved Sense8, I rewatch it on occasion, one of my favourites for sure
Watching Cardcaptor Sakura made me feel so seen as a bi guy. The key part was Sakura's love interest also having a crush on her own crush, or her older brother being very clearly bi. I thought they were SO cool, the way a little boy does, and seeing them feel things I felt made me feel reassured in a way that stayed with me for years.
Also bi guy here and I feel that. I was so disappointed when they explained away Syaoran's attraction to Yukito as Syaoran's sensitivity to Moon magic. In my heart he shall always be bi...
I also didn't care for the way they rushed Sakura falling for Syaoran. We had over a season to see Syaoran falling for her, but only an episode or two for the other side? Ugh.
I'm trans, and gay. I have shame around it and confusion. I also am afraid cis gay men would never accept me. Especially currently, as I am not fully medically transitioned. I've only had 1 cis man hit on me as if I was just a regular guy... we were in the psych ward though so weird circumstances. I have not told my family to consider me gay even though I am out as trans... It's all very messy.
As a cis gay man, it's possible gay men might not want to date a trans guy, but there's also gay men who put it their Grindr bio, "no fats, femmes, or blacks. Just a preference!"
Consider it a bullet dodged.
The best comment I've heard is that there's a difference between being attracted to men and being attracted to penises.
Personally, I'd date what I'm hesitant to call a "pre-op" trans guy.
Because personally I don't think everyone needs or wants bottom surgery.
Just my 2 cents.
I think there can be a lot of toxicity in different circles. While sure, there are preferences, there are also men who don't care, who are pan, who are demi, who have a preference for trans men (though I don't know if that is really where you want to go). But a lot of the toxic stuff is that gold star gay shit, which I believe they consider a pre-bottom surgery trans man to count, because the "platinum gay" (i think that is what they call themselves) is someone who wasn't even delivered vaginally, they were born via c-section. I'm a bi cis woman, so I am mostly jist thrown into the many debates surrounding all this vs experiencing it, but I have a lot of trans friends. However, even as a woman I have had a gay man proposition me for sex, because I "only had sex like a gay man with tits" at the time. So there are definitely people out there for you, and I don't think it will even need to come with more transitioning (though, realistically that always increases chances). The more you feel ok as you, which is hard as it is, the easier it is going to be to find others. You're gonna do great ❤
I am gay 🎉
Love yourself as your are. God makes no mistakes and he made no mistake creating u the way u are. The enemy will always try to tell people otherwise
Love the combination of psychological insight and historical information. And Etymology, which I really am very curious about in general.
I was outed to my extremely homophobic and conservative family by someone who I definitely should have been able to trust. I found out years later, and I felt SO unsafe, and it hit me like a fucking wall. The person said "why should you care if people know?" and just could not care to understand why coming out is a big deal and my choice. The fact that I was outed to the people I was... that made it so much worse.
“Why don’t you want everyone to know against your will? aRenT u pRouD?? U hAvE a whOlE moNtH aFterAlL!!”
But to be serious for a second, I’m really sorry that happened to you:(
@@allisoncastle thanks 💙
I was outed too. It sucked.
First, that absolutely horrific. I'm sure that was a frightening experience. It's also caused a lot of teen suicides in the 1980s.
I hope you know you are loved.
There needs to be some type of legislation or law written holding severe penalties for that happening. Especially, if it puts you in an unsafe environment! I'm so sorry that happened to you. Mean people suck!
So I grew up crushing hard on extremely fem cartoon characters, which looking back the sapphic vibes are really obvious - but because I'm a grey ace I've never really felt that inspirational moment connecting with media until I was an adult - Todd's arc in BoJack Horseman was the very first time I watched something and went "OH! That's like me!!" and it hit me like a ton of bricks that representation meant so much to me. I didn't know what I was missing out on until that moment, so Todd will always have a special place in my heart. I'd really like to see more healthy ace representation out there.
Me too!!! Bojack Horseman is an S-tier show for me. I’m ace so Todd being ace was the best and I love him as character
My wife likes to pick on me for my very specific and narrow form of gaydar. She has noticed a trend in the women I find attractive. They are almost always bi/pan. It's even like "oh I used to have a crush on that actress when I was younger" and she'll laugh because it'll turn out they later came out as bi. Specific example is Michelle Rodriguez.
As you might have guessed, my wife is bi.
Glad e got you acknowledging the R slur and medicines part in that term being used towards any and all disabilities. Once again you’re the most based psychiatrist I’ve experienced so keep it up.
I love that Dwight also learned a lesson in the end! I have the same feeling for Dwight as you do for Micheal - he’s also naive and his goal is always about surveying for information about the betterment of the office
As the Pride in London start line manager, whose job it is to count all the people participating as they cross the start line. We have 30,000 participants in 600 groups, 1000 volunteers and 1.5 million visitors.
Btw I just realised I'm on the banner on the PiL page. The purple haired wheelie with my blue haired partner leaning in.
My favourite show was DS9. It would be 20 years until i realised why i connected with Jadzia!
In the movie "Bringing Up Baby" (1938) there's a scene with Cary Grant wearing Katherine Hepburn's peignor (due to screwball circumstances). A woman arrives at the front door and is confused.
A frustrated Grant says "I went suddenly GAY this morning!"
If anyone ever tells you you’re “too much”, just tell them they’re free to go and find someone who’s less than you are.
Loved this episode!! You should watch the one where they look at SAD and depression in the workplace!
I know it's cheesy and not the best representation, even for its time, but as a kid who grew up in a fundamentalist household, being able to sneak in some episodes of Queer as Folk (US) really changed my perspective on queer people in general, and helped me come to terms with my own Bisexuality.
Pride is still a protest here, in Hungary, and it's sad we need it. We luckily don't face a Russia-level systematic discrimination... yet. We're sloooowly getting there. The anti-LGBT measures are just the same as in Russia, only with a few years of delay.
As for queer media that influenced me: the first gay series I've ever seen is an anime called Given. Made me understand a lot of stuff about myself (I'm bi), and also made me fall in love with rock music.
6:00. I know someone who was ashamed because he had always wanted kids. He didn't like the idea of not having his own or even raising kids with a two-father household. He had a lot of self-resentment for that.
I don't know where he stands now as far as kids are concerned, but I guess things have improved somewhat. He finally introduced his boyfriend to his family last year and they now live together
Seeing the film Philadelphia was definitely a formative thing for me in how I see the LGBTQ+ community (I'm straight, but it came out when I was 12 or 13 so right as I was starting to mature and get a fuller view of the world at large), but honestly, Queer Eye (the original run) was maybe the most impactful for me, even if I think the new version is leaps and bounds better because, as much as I love the original cast, it felt like they were trying to caricaturize them a bit and lean into stereotypes a little more. It definitely had a big impact when I was watching a later season episode that featured a trans man, and I realized about five minutes in, it was a high school classmate of mine (who, incidentally, gave me one of the best compliments I've ever received when we peer-reviewed each other's papers freshman year in English class, and you know it must have been good because I'm 43 and still remember the exact phrasing he used).
Please Like Me!
Beautifully crafted autobiopgraphic story of Josh Thomas, a gay comedian who later on got an autism spectrum diagnosis. The series explicitly deals with mental health and complicated relationships, growing up gay and the beauty of life. Every episode is named after a meal that is prepared during the opening credits to a song called "I'll be fine"
The character of Josh was the only character on TV I felt truly represented by as a teenager. When the actor shared his diagnosis, it got me interested in neurodivergence. Which was an important development step for me, let's just say that
That show was fantastic!
"Why not use lame" that's just a slur for a different group of people!
Is it?
@@TheIntimateAvenger yeah it's technically a slur against disabled people
@@mhernandez1345specifically it means your leg doesn't function well and you have a limp.
At the time of that episode, I was following a lot of queer websites because I had a lot of quee friends. Towleroad got mad because Oscar Nunez described the kiss as awkward and thought he was saying kissing another man was awkward.
Being a kid in the 90's was weird... Everyone's Kryptonite was being called gay... but the actual gay kid in the corner talking about Aaron Carter with the girls wasn't picked on.
This feels like a bunch of teenagers trying to prove they aren't gay...
Maybe that depends where you lived because it's not my experience
FYI to anyone who doesn’t already know, Creed is played by Creed Batton formerly a member of the 60’s hits
powerhouse band “The Grass Roots”.
I'm a 40-year-old bisexual woman and the shows Queer as Folk and The L-word were very monumental in my queer self-discovery.
I'm not gay, but there are some queer shows that I like. Mostly anime though like "Sasaki and Miyano" and my personal favorite "given". It's really fun watching them not knowing what to do. They tried to convince themselves that they aren't queer, but everyone watching knows that they definitely are. Making the moment where they actually get together even more precious to watch.
from an autistic person, my head cannon is Michael Scott's autistic, or at very least neurodivergent in some way. in a way it's also through counter transference. I find, though I was late diagnosed, the people who made me cringe the most, to the point i couldn't watch them were coded autistic. plus, michael just reads everything soooo wrong.
Matt Baume does a great job of exploring gay representation in popular media, and many of the well-intentioned "progressive" depictions from '70s and '80s TV he has looked at could give Michael Scott a run for his money in terms of cringe-factor, but I still think one of the first to do it got it right; Billy Crystal, playing 'Jodie', in 'Soap'.
Yes, love his videos as well. His stuff about Frasier, in particular, is something I go back and revisit from time to time.
I am one of those who thinks Will & Grace is really way too loud, but it is just the 2 exuberant characters who aggressively overshadow the needs of those around them. In real life I find gay people to be just as self-aware as straight people, and maybe even more so since they lack the entitlement of being "standard". I think my gaydar comes down to recognizing when people have their guard up, and the relief in their demeanor when I mention my ex-girlfriend.
As someone who was outed, I freakin' hate Michael outing Oscar. The kiss is positively painful. The word "queer" used to be hurled at me like a dagger. I take pride in reclaiming it as my label.
him fan girling over Jonathan Bailey was so cute and inocent
There's a deleted scene where Oscar says he tried to come out to Michael in his interview but Michael thought he was joking...and that's the only reason he didn't come out at the office.
I am SO excited for you to start looking at episodes of the office (US). It's all-time favourite show and there are so many amazing episodes. The counseling episode where Toby tries to counsel Michael is excellent, the relationship between Michael and Jan (especially episode Dinner Party) is absolutely worth looking at, and Creed as a human being is... a lot 😂
It's incredible how well this sitcom aged
Loved this!! You should do the episode on SAD and depression in the workplace!
Nickleback!!! lmao im dying, that was funny.
Queer as a 3 dollar bill is a line I have heard many times.
Ivanova's relationship with Talia on Babylon 5 might have been the first queer relationship I saw on tv. I still love that show.
"Just download Grindr! 😏" I SEE YOU, CHEEKY! 😂😂😂
Yay! The Office! Geez, I forgot how cringy this episode was.
I was still (technically) a teenager when Moonlight, Call Me By Your Name, Sex Education and the Spanish TV series Elite came out. They really gave me the boost I needed to come out. When I was younger I also remember the conversation around Milk and Brokeback Mountain. I grew up in Ecuador where homophobia IS still a big deal, but having the most talked about TV shows and movies depicting well rounded portrayls of LGBT people does go a long way.
14:15 While the Sexual Offences Act 1967 was passed in the UK, but it didn't apply to the whole of the UK, only England and Wales. Scotland and Northern Ireland's updates came later. In the case of NI, it took the involvement of the ECHR via the Dudgeon case. That was an important case here in Ireland (Republic), as it was cited when Norris went through the same process with the ECHR.
I definitely think gaydar is a thing, but mostly for other queer people. The vast majority of the time I wouldn't be able to tell you HOW I know, it's just an overall vibe, usually before my brain has even had time to do any conscious evaluation. Sometimes there are concrete things I can point out that reinforce my hunch, but usually I just...know. I don't think I've ever had somebody come out to me and I hadn't already suspected.
re: your very first point, about the f-slur originally being about women: I think a lot of people would be surprised to learn how consistent this actually is! Many of the "historical" derogatory terms for gay men were not necessarily about homosexuality at all, they were often words very specifically referring to someone who is on the, shall we say, receiving end of sexual acts. It was, for a very long time, seen as degrading for a man to be in what was seen as a submissive sexual position, because it was like being a "woman." Homophobia and misogyny are ugly cousins ):
The first depiction of homosexuality I ever saw on TV was the American TV series "SOAP". Billy Crystal played a gay man. There was some stereotyping, but the humor was directed at the stereotyper (not a real word?), not at Billy Crystal's character. As best I can recall. That was probably 50 years ago now.
As a black queer woman, Noahs Arc was essential viewing for me
I am LGBT Gen X and DEEPLY resent the word Qu*r and the word D*ke. Every time I hear it, no matter who says it, I feel it like a hammer to the heart.
I fully realize that is oversensitivity on my part, but it is what it is.
2:28, even 19th and early 20th Century books like Moby Dick, Alice in Wonderland, Sherlock Holmes and the Wizard of Oz, use “queer” to mean strange.
I didn't realize I was queer until 19, I grew up thinking what I felt (demisexuality and nonbinary) was something humans felt in general. I thought everyone else felt sexual attraction the same way and had times they inexplicably felt genderless. Until I came across a, "what asexuality are you" OKCupid quiz- had no idea what asexual was. Then I discovered nonbinary not long after because I went to a year-long hyper-fixation on gender and sexualities
ADHD used to be called:
Brain-injured
Brain-damaged
Clumsy child syndrome
Minimal brain dysfunction
Nervous (a "nervous child")
Organic brain disease
for a long time my gaydar was so bad, after spending some time around gay men ive realised that men who present themselvs in a flamboyant manner (aka power bottoms) are the only ones you can tell are gay from looking at them. For the others you would need to talk to them and get an understanding of their pop culture references and their interests before being able to tell without asking. For me as a woman, most of the time i know because i dont feel like theres a chance they will hit on me, aka i can relax around them. Its obviously not all men though but thats how i figure it out. Gay men are usually pretty clued in to human rights or womens issues way more then hetero men, aka they can recognise misogyny way faster whereas hetero men go cave man brain about it.
just fyi, being “flamboyant” =/= being a power bottom the way you imply it is here
“What is straight culture now?” I mean, you pretty much nailed it.
I know the f-word is awful to hear for a lot of fellow queer people, but even as someone who has many times been on the sharp end of that word, I cannot stop myself from laughing at Michael Scott saying "faggie" and then feeling bad about it.
Like any other slur or variation of a slur wouldnt have worked. It's just perfect. I love this episode. It honestly did a hell of a lot to ease network audiences' wariness about "the gays."
Like, I prefer my workplaces with NO sa obvs, but in a sitcom, it's nice to see the aggressor being the cishet normative one.
Degrassi was a great show that I grew up with awesome Trans/non-binary rep. Adam Torress, played by Jordan Todosey - played a trans guy. The actress I watched from a prior show - resonated with me prior to coming out as first non-binary, and then also trans. Similar, Yael - first non-binary character. I very much appreciate from a teens perspective - really dealing with those issues and I feel really was the gateway show for other tv shows to follow
I think too many shows are trying to exclusively get gay/trans people to play gay/trans characters. Sometimes, I think it is appropriate but I do not think trans/gay people need to exclusively play gay/trans characters. Sure, if it historically makes sense - than sure, getting certain people - especially when it makes sense from a racial/ethnical perspective, but as a trans asian, I dont need every trans person on tv to be played by a trans person. But that's just me. So long as the role is played authentically - than that works for me.
6:00 The past hasn't gone anywhere, it is still here with other garments
Man, 2004 was a different time.
Back in the 90s, when I was at university, I used to love to spend time just browsing the school's massive research library. The university had both a medical school and an engineering school
I one time came across a very old book on the shelf, from the early 1900s, titled, The Care and Treatment of Idiots and low-Grade Morons, or something to that effect. I was shocked by the title but I realized these were once medical terms but as soon as they enter the common lexicon they become insults that can no longer be used in medicine.
I believe an "idiot" was someone who today would be classified as non-verbal and low-functioning, such as incapable of feeding themselves, using a toilet, etc. A moron would be a person more ambulatory and verbal but in the case of "low-grade" needing constant care and supervision. This was a book about how to take care of the more severe cases usually found in mental institutions.
It's not specifically a queer show but Degrassi had a big impact for me. I was in high school at the time so I could relate to some of the stuff they were going through in general but also seeing gay people in the show helped make it so relatable for me. Seeing the struggles they went through with accepting their sexuality, with being scared to come out, and being terrified of people finding out. I was so worried my family would find out I watched the show and would have the volume low and sit right in front of the tv so I could hear it but no one else could. But seeing Riley and Zane's relationship in the show really had an impact on me.
Wasn't heterosexuality in the same "seminal " text also defined as deviant because it meant something like single people in multiple non-procreative relationships?
There were a lot of things in that book but basically any sex that wasn't about making babies was heavily pathologised
Basically "what if Christian theology, but with longer words".
I fought the gayness in me because I didn't want to be even more different being autistic was enough and didn't want to give the bullies another reason for going after me.
I don't think I have gaydar. I do have wishyouaregaydar and it often does not work ;)
Queer as Folk and Modern Family were favs.
Edit: Would love your take on episodes of both shows ❤
I weirdly grew up mainly encountering gay rep from the 1950s and 1960s - William Burroughs and Round The Horne. I think I liked gay rep in shows like Ab Fab and Gimme Gimme Gimme and Six Feet Under because even bit parts felt less like representation and more like characters in a story with a purpose.
I've been watching for months and could have never guessed your orientation. Lmao had to blast it in my face for me to see
One of the reason why I requested that Frasier episode The Impossible Dream is because I'd like to hear your thoughts as a gay psychiatrist.
Your point about being gay *being* the joke nails why Dave Chapelle is so unfunny now even though I think he used to be hilarious. It's totally possible for jokes to be about the trans experience and be funny, but (since he knows nothing about that experience) that's not what his jokes are, being trans is always the punchline and even aside from how childish it is to intentionally try to offend people, not to mention to constantly complain about being "canceled" while releasing multiple specials that are doing very well, the jokes are just lame because of it.
James Acaster's stand up in response to exactly this is absolutely brilliant and definitely worth a watch
Best queer show I’ve seen and means so so much to me is Our Flag Means Death and to about pirates
The representation there is so great there’s no such thing as even having to come out it’s just all normalized without making it look forced
im back Elliott.... where are youre plants Elliott.....Where are the plants Eliiott! Did you water them, or did you let the dryout!
Where ARE THE PLANTS!?!?!?!
I would love love love for you too analyze some of Six Feet Under as that was the formative portrayal of gay characters on TV i first saw. I mean i guess before that i saw Ross's ex wife on Friends and knew gay people existed... my mom watched Will & Grace and i saw it in passing. But nothing quite as sympathetic and in-depth as Six Feet Under which was really not afraid to show what it feels like to be gay in a society that still has a lot of homophobia, to be gay and religious, to be gay and in a very masculine career (Keith is a police officer) etc etc.
I may have seen the Desperate Housewives arc someone else mentioned first too. Andrew being gay and how Bree handles it would be so fun to see your reaction to too. But i don't think i learned as much from that.
Btw i was asexual (and gray-panromantic, dating people of any gender but without kissing etc) all along.
I then got into Skins UK partially because of Emily/Naomi and then watched the very queer shows of Glee and The Fosters and got really into them. I crave a lot of queer media in my life. Faking It was weirdly compelling. Love, Victor was actually really good and unique in many ways. Etc etc.
I know it's by far not the same, but I heve severe chronified eating disorder (and other mental health issues). After my parents divorce when I was 15 years old we had no contact with my father for over a decade. The eating disorder had developped after the divorce. It was initially me who after all that time took a step towards my father again, and my sister "joining in" after a while. He knew nothing about my issues, and my sister blackmailed me into "coming out" to him (by telling she would deny every contact with him if I did not and then would have to tell him why she did). I was not ready. It was terrible... I understand it was not all easy for her either, but that does not make the distress I felt any less.
I don't want to disregard any of the queer experience whatsoever (I'm also ace, almost nobody knows). I just imagine it might feel similar, since there is so much shame and feelings of guilt coming with my issues. I may be all wrong with that. And exactly because my sister and father are pretty judgemental and let's say "rainbow flag phobic" and ridiculing, I have not and most likely will not out me as ace towards them. I'm not begging to be hurt even more.
Anyway, for whatever the reason might be, I can relate to the devastating pressure of giving away sth very pesonal and sensitive to others when you are not ready, not comfortable with, and being forced to by someone else.
Every time I watch this episode, certain scenes make me so uncomfortable. Just like Oscar is while they’re in the meeting room. You can also see that everyone else is horrified and on Oscar’s side of the situation. Just look at Meredith’s face.
Watching this makes me realize how autistic I am, I thought the Angela was saying that will and grace was too loud as in volume, didn't realize you were gay, I believed Oscar when he said he wasn't, and I was momently confused why he lied, I didn't pick up on the HR guy being honest about outing Oscar until he said it like three times, and I thought Oscars Boyfriend was his roommate for wayyy to long.
Sugar Rush that was on c4 in the early 2000s was definitely my queer awakening!
Growing up in the 90s, everyone I knew said gay as a way to describe something lame. But it was never a hate word against gay people, we didn't even know anyone who was gay. Words are weird
Being a gay person who grew up in the 90s, yes, it absolutely was used disparagingly towards anyone who was even suspected to be gay, or even to straight boys if someone wanted to insult them. But people also said f****t rampantly back then.
@@baixiaolangI'm sorry about that
I love this show. Also, I don’t even know where the term “gaydar” even came from. And no I do not think it exists
Oh the Queer rep in shows and movies angle: I definitely watched the usuals like Queer as Folk, but I saw things like Oz sooner, but I connected more with movies and shows where being gay was just part of the characters and it was "allowed" to be shown as 'normal', not hidden, not "uniquely" celebrated. The movie Go sticks out to me a lot with Jay Mohr and Scott Wolf and they are just two actors dating and bickering with each other over petty issues and it wasn't different from a bickering petty straight male/female couple. It wasn't "who was top or bottom", it was "there's a problem or drama and we need to fight it out and be just as immature."
I will say that The Office is often a show I avoid watching because I can't deal with the cringe. I love Parks and Rec and other "Office-style" shows, but not the Office.
Nickelback being straight culture is the funniest thing I've heard all day 😂
The gay television that affected me the most was the storyline from the fosters with jude
The gays could truly be anywhere! Maybe even on your screen…
i’d love to see your reaction to George Carlin “Soft Language”. especially after reacting to this episode
I'm queer (& use that word with the most positive connotation).
As for lgbt shows...
Oh, gosh, I could not watch the L-word (only recently saw the 1st season) because it was too melodramatic, soap-opera kind of drama constantly, but I can understand why it was groundbreaking at the time.
The shows I did like were Will& Grace and Queer as Folk (the US version - I know there's a previous UK version that's great, but unfortunately I never saw it), then I started watching a lot of other LGBTQ content (films mostly - there are some truly wonderful ones, especially in the last 10 years as we have moved away from the need to have gay characters always end up tragically).
These days, I'm also glad to have discovered the so-called "bl-series" from Asia. There's quite a lot of them now and like in any "industry" there are some problematic ones or, again, too melodramatic &sappy for my taste, but then there are some ABSOLUTE GEMS .
Yes, representation matters, though I enjoy watching stuff that reflects other queer experiences (for instance, I may not be trans or a gay man, but I will enjoy a good story where the main protagonists live those experiences). I am also drawn to queer content because I'm kind of fed up with all the hetero content. For every queer story, there's a thousand hetero stories and after a while, most of them are pretty much the same, it gets boring lol. Good to have some diversity in what we watch or read!
I've realised something, when I watched this episode. Please correct me, if this thought is somewhat stupid.
You have a right to be oblivious or ignorant about the knowledge of other people's individual traits. The only thing, I want you to make sure, you did right, is to ensure, that everyone in your company is feeling physically and mentally safe around you (that means, try to modify your behaviour towards the others, when you see clear signs of distress; and if you don't know what to do - just ask them what seems to be the problem, what can I do to help; that's it).
Oh, this is gonna be painful, I love it
As a straight dude, i find myself wanting to hang out with gay guys more than straight ones. I think its because dude - dudes, well, ya cant really talk to them about things in ways that straight dudes would fifd uncomfortable, its like talking to a straight dude about dude issues, but talking about it to and with a dude that isnt going to break your balls over it or dismiss what you say or how you feel, or even simply just shut down and act like it was never brought up.
Trying to talk to my straight friends about how im feeling about the stresses of work and bills and the expectations that my family has of me, they just say , "Yeah, i know, it sucks." you know dude stuff, which i get it. Im a dude, but this is why i say it nice to sometimes talk to gay dudes about stuff like that, cuz they still get what its like to be a man, but they are less inclined to have a guarded outlook on the conversation. I dunno, its hard to explain.
Its kinda like, youd figure, coming from a straight dudes perspective, that a dude on dude relationship would be perfect at times. I imagine it would be like dating and living with your best bro, dont gotta argue about food stuff, or gaming too much, i bet you can both watch the game, your wardrobe doubles if you are the same size, all good things right? .... It makes more sense, two dudes doodlin, and dating rather than two girls, dudes would just like, bro out. Right? The only issue i would have with it all would be when push came to shove and cloths started comeing off, betwixt the steamy fold of sheets i dare not go with my bro lol... But wait, then thats just two straight dudes living together, isnt it?... see, this is the issue, this is all from a straight guys perspective, so of coarse its gonna make sense when i look at it that way lol im just saying, me and by guy friends get along blissfully without women around, sure, we dont have tickle fights and cuddle either, and dont talk about personal stuff lol but other than that its stress free, as oppose to dating a woman, like 90% of the time. What can i say, i love women, well... parts of them. The squishy soft parts. The talking, nagging, annoying parts...those parts suck. guess its a double edged sword.
With you in the beginning, lost me at the end
@@blustery_tabletop Ya win some, ya lose some. lol I think i was just taking yall along with me on my roll coaster of random thought i have when i should be paying attention at work.
It's almost more strange to me that everyone isn't pan. I have a terrible gaydar, I think, because I naturally assume everyone is pan or bi or any other variation and I have to stop and think like "is this person really lgbt+ or are they cishet?"
lol yes straight culture is nickelback you nailed it
Another thing about having Michael being a bumbling idiot is how it means the show can tackle what would otherwise be a somewhat heavy subject (homophobia) somewhat serious. While still being relatively lighthearted. If a serious show had to make this episode tackling these same problems (using slurs, outing people) youd have to be angry at people in the episode.
This definitely proves that this show is better than the British version
You should do a episode about New Amsterdam
Weird fact: "fagott" is the Swedish word for bassoon
Personally, i don't think there's a meaningful distinction between using the term mental retardation and intellectual development disorders. The main problem i have is that its obviously the connotation of the word the professionals are trying to avoid, but slur tends to follow slang, so eventually some derivations of "disorders of intellectual development" will be used in the pejorative, its nothing more that kicking the can down the road.
This episode was always so cringy and difficult to watch. 😬 Your evaluation of it was great. Being outed at work would be terrible. Watching the show as an adult, I see how much therapy Michael Scott needs
Hey!....... you take back what you said about nickleback lol
Good Omens helped me realize I was trans.
What do you use? As a gay guy so far I always prefer lynx African, wish I knew deodorant my crush used in like 2012 was my favourite one to smell
I think Michael Scott is and very sympathetic doofus, largely due to Steve Carrell’s great acting. Michael always means well.
I like the term «vegetable»
I'd love for you to react to The Simpsons episode where Homer thinks Bart is gay. ❤