Editing YOUR College Essays | The BEST Essay I've Read So Far

แชร์
ฝัง
  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 2 ต.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 169

  • @elevatedschool
    @elevatedschool  2 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    Since 2022, we’ve edited more than 3300 college essays and helped hundreds of seniors from around the world gain more than 600+ acceptances to top 20 schools. If you’d like your essay professionally edited, we’d be honored to help!
    Visit: www.elevated.school/editmyessay
    Where our students got in: www.elevated.school/2024results

  • @sumaiyatahsin4707
    @sumaiyatahsin4707 ปีที่แล้ว +113

    These analysis videos are so much better than watching dozens of TH-cam tutorials and reading tons of sample essays.
    Thank you!

  • @systemloading45
    @systemloading45 ปีที่แล้ว +78

    You don't understand how helpful you are!!!!!!!!!!!!! Your work is soooo appreciated

    • @bgavd3695
      @bgavd3695 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hey, I have a question that if I can use Chatgpt to improve grammar and punctuations.

  • @huntertharpe1917
    @huntertharpe1917 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    More great work from Kevin! I especially love how Kevin points out specific places where the student can explain themselves in more detail to create natural transitions!

  • @GabeHoffman-p5m
    @GabeHoffman-p5m 15 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Love seeing the live editing play-by-play!

  • @elevatedschool
    @elevatedschool  ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Hi friends! It's happening again! From now until September 28th, we will be reviewing YOUR supplemental and UC essays for free! Send them to essay@elevated.school with the subject line "TH-cam Review" for a chance to have your essay analyzed on our channel! If you are comfortable having me workshop your common app essay in a TH-cam video, I would be more than happy to do it completely free for you (we will anonymize your names of course!)! 😊😊😊

    • @analu2821
      @analu2821 ปีที่แล้ว

      this is amazingggg thanks

    • @meeqvin
      @meeqvin ปีที่แล้ว

      where i can send commonapp essay?

    • @Wirunaga
      @Wirunaga 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@meeqvin essay@elevated.school broo, he typed that

  • @Sara-gm4qz
    @Sara-gm4qz 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    How do people write like this? I don’t stand a chance 😭

    • @heloooooDiana
      @heloooooDiana 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      😭😭ikkkkk it's so hard

  • @MariaRita-zg9sb
    @MariaRita-zg9sb 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    Hello from Brazil! First, I would like to say thank you SO MUCH for this and all your other videos, I'm definitely taking notes! From this video I learned the how to write continously ( don't want to do "The Eureka Problem") and to worry less, I just need to be myself and share my history, but in a unique way. I would love to get my essay reviewed by you, because here in Brazil we use "reais", not dollars, and '"1 real" its 6 dollars, and unfortunately I can't afford that :/ I hope I have this opportunity, and thank you for giving to me and all the students around the world, It means a lot to us who have a big dream waiting to be fulfilled in our hearts :)
    Yours sincelery, a girl who dreams a lot and its giving her best (or just Maria)

  • @elevatedschool
    @elevatedschool  ปีที่แล้ว +71

    Hi friends!! For the next month (until 11/1/23), we’ll be selecting 3 of the commenters on THIS video for a FREE essay review! To qualify, all you have to do is like and reply to this comment with something you learned from this video :) FYI normally, we charge $225 for a professional common app review with feedback from two of our ElevatEd consultants!

    • @aarohikulkarni8524
      @aarohikulkarni8524 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hey! Thank you for this video. I'd say I learnt the importance of analyzing other people's essays. Also, I really liked the tip about the usage of fun verbs, and how it just makes the essay so much more lively.
      I'd love to get my essay reviewed by you :)

    • @sarahcarroll520
      @sarahcarroll520 ปีที่แล้ว

      This video honestly helped me so much with writing my Nat Merit Finalist app essay. I learned that talking about the process, adding specifics (even if they feel kinda niche), being vulnerable, and talking more about the solution than the problem helps to make all my Common App essays better 😊

    • @pranavidantuluri1685
      @pranavidantuluri1685 ปีที่แล้ว

      This video was super helpful in writing my UNC Chapel Hill supplementals. The specificity was something I was clearly lacking, and this video highlighted that the more specific and personal, the better. This series motivated me a lot to think outside the box when writing my essays and I hope you continue it!

    • @emilybaraceros4344
      @emilybaraceros4344 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thank you so much! for all of your college writing tips! Your video has taught me to watch out for cliches in my essay and to be as descriptive as possible (show don't tell!). Looking forward to watching your next college essay editing video! :)

    • @passionateeditsandtutorial5638
      @passionateeditsandtutorial5638 ปีที่แล้ว

      This video provided me with a reminder that the tone of the essay is really important, and being able to use different word choices to reflect and balance different tones can help an essay stand out.

  • @marina3934
    @marina3934 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    This is so so helpful! After watching this, I cut own a few sentences that I didn’t need and elaborated on certain things! Much appreciated!!

    • @izzatillousmonov5126
      @izzatillousmonov5126 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hey, I think we can help each other. I need a partner on this. What do you say

  • @elevatedschool
    @elevatedschool  ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Hi everyone! It's been 2 years since we started this TH-cam channel + launched this agency to help kids get into colleges. So far, we've helped more than 70+ students from all across the world and every background imaginable get into every single Ivy League School, Stanford, MIT and more! If you'd like your essay by us, just visit our website! www.elevated.school/editmyessay

  • @natinati9166
    @natinati9166 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +21

    00:02 Learn how to make your college essays stand out and get into your dream schools.
    01:52 The student's mother was diagnosed with breast cancer.
    03:35 Gradual transition after witnessing mother's chemotherapy
    05:26 Teaching basic survival skills and saving lives
    07:15 The student's essay lacks specific details and needs more profound reflection in the conclusion.
    09:05 The meaning of life shifted for the speaker from pursuing joy to serving others
    11:23 Creating the ultimate chocolate chip cookie experience and sharing it with others.
    13:10 The organic chemical reaction between amino acids and reducing sugars creates melanoidin compounds that provide color and flavor to brown foods.
    15:09 Baking as an expression of admiration
    16:55 Value the process of creating something remarkable
    18:31 The essay started off strong but fizzled out towards the end.
    20:06 The video discusses the emotional impact and authenticity of a college essay.

  • @sarthak1448
    @sarthak1448 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Let's get bro to the 1M

  • @elevatedschool
    @elevatedschool  4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    From now until August 2024, I (Kevin) will offering doing FREE intro calls with students (and parents!)
    Visit: linktr.ee/elevatedschool
    Thank you watching our videos! Your support seriously means the world to us!!

  • @bernardafrifa4587
    @bernardafrifa4587 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    This has really build my confidence to send you my essay and I’m thankful for that

  • @tanvi6033
    @tanvi6033 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    this is by far one of the best series/programs you have implemented- seeing the edits hands on is more helpful than you could ever imagine

  • @ngwuemeka1838
    @ngwuemeka1838 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you for this . I was able to cut down a few sentences from my essay 😊

  • @arnavmiranda
    @arnavmiranda 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Hey Kevin! Love the video!
    Quick question, after watching pretty much every video on your channel I've noticed how you place heavy emphasis on the P/S ratio. However, the second essay you've displayed here, the one you gave an 8 to, doesn't really display much of either a problem or solution. Does this mean that it is possible to draft good essays that don't need to stick to the double problem solution format? Asking because mine is similar to the essay in question here, and I'm a little anxious 😅😅

    • @KumudKhattar
      @KumudKhattar 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Yes I would like to know this as well. Thank you!!

  • @chirmidetha4939
    @chirmidetha4939 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    You are amazing. This is what we need. I would love to get my essay reviewed by you.

  • @PoodleVR
    @PoodleVR 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    funny enough, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer my sophmore year too. All my grades went down that year and i haven't been sure if i should mention that to colleges to give reason to the drop in grades. I'm worried it will make it look like an excuse though.

    • @elevatedschool
      @elevatedschool  2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      You can mention it in the Additional Information section of your application!

    • @elevatedschool
      @elevatedschool  2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Sorry to hear about your Mom :( is she doing alright?

  • @yea364
    @yea364 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I’m applying to Northeastern as my ED school. Since they don’t have any supplementals this would help a lot!

  • @SammettaWorzie
    @SammettaWorzie 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    This video was soo helpful! Thank soo much!

  • @KhanhKrafts
    @KhanhKrafts 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I love all you guys do! Your videos are great and really helpful. I love writing and watching these videos has helped me a lot :)

  • @adedunnipinheiro3344
    @adedunnipinheiro3344 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    You’re so nice! I appreciate your channel! Thank you

  • @СамираШангареева-и3ю
    @СамираШангареева-и3ю วันที่ผ่านมา

    Hi
    I was wondering if you guys review essay for New York university?

  • @angThiDiemTrinh
    @angThiDiemTrinh หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I amm so grateful for your mission, you should be more popular!!! Hope to see more valuable advice from you!!! I really appreciate your dedication and kindness!

  • @swayampathak4273
    @swayampathak4273 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

    i thought this was kevin leonardo

  • @bsimret
    @bsimret 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    So helpful to see your editing process! Very helpful as partent to know how to give helpful feedback.

  • @Nyumnyum122
    @Nyumnyum122 หลายเดือนก่อน

    the second one was definitely edited by ai

  • @r22gamer54
    @r22gamer54 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    what colleges did they get into?

  • @KokeAlmaz
    @KokeAlmaz 11 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I'm Ethiopian student.
    I like all the reviews you have made.
    So helpful🙏

  • @alisonaldrich648
    @alisonaldrich648 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Great info. Wondering why you didn’t talk about the frequent use of passive voice in this essay.

  • @fozilmamadaliyev7171
    @fozilmamadaliyev7171 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thank you, Kevin. We're learning a lot from you. I hope you will do this free editing again soon!

  • @jbabarquez
    @jbabarquez 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    WOW. It's a good essay but life doesn't happen in that order, right? That's my struggle now. My life is all over.

  • @davidmasneri3505
    @davidmasneri3505 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    If I deleted the cliche hook, would I keep my opening two sentences or add more?

    • @diegonunez4085
      @diegonunez4085 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ermmm I think one or 2 sentence hooks are good bc they kind of demand the reader to keep looking for answers to your hook yk. Your hook should kind of leave the readers a little bit confused which would result in them lookikg further into your essay to understand the mystery you portrayed in the opening

  • @sabeennawaz5830
    @sabeennawaz5830 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Brilliant!! A lot of learning for everyone

  • @fozilmamadaliyev7171
    @fozilmamadaliyev7171 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I am wondering if we also can have access to the elevated essay rubric.

  • @lukesanborn
    @lukesanborn 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I ❤ common app essays

  • @nabhaf2796
    @nabhaf2796 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you so so much for your video ❤✨

  • @rubenbartlett2225
    @rubenbartlett2225 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    What question does these 2 essays apply to? Is it just the general/personal essay?

  • @GabrielleWatry
    @GabrielleWatry 16 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    🎉

  • @kadirimariamdamilola9905
    @kadirimariamdamilola9905 ปีที่แล้ว

    Please can I submit my essay for review but not have it included in the video

  • @kazishahjalal6852
    @kazishahjalal6852 ปีที่แล้ว

    Can anyone please tell me whether fictional essay is allowed in common app or not? Different people are saying different things. 😊

  • @snake_05
    @snake_05 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Couldn’t have come at a better time 😄

  • @joshuabober9171
    @joshuabober9171 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Rewriting my essay with only a week left til ED 😅

  • @visionaryscenario
    @visionaryscenario 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Do you review common app essay for free?

  • @NahumX-d5k
    @NahumX-d5k ปีที่แล้ว

    Thanks for the video!. It saved my life😆😆😆😆

  • @davidbaker8294
    @davidbaker8294 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you very much!! Very helpful and I havent even started my draft yet!

    • @elevatedschool
      @elevatedschool  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Glad it was helpful! We'll be doing this series again in the fall!

  • @Prometheus--
    @Prometheus-- ปีที่แล้ว +1

    good morning y'all

  • @tobalaseoyewusi6199
    @tobalaseoyewusi6199 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Where have you been all through my college applications? So good.

  • @opensales1499
    @opensales1499 15 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Great content. Thank you.

    • @elevatedschool
      @elevatedschool  14 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Glad it was helpful!

  • @badralbeity4645
    @badralbeity4645 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You are an absolute legend!!

  • @edidiongluke
    @edidiongluke 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Please do you review for graduate applicants too?

  • @gobelfury
    @gobelfury 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Can you edit mine?

    • @elevatedschool
      @elevatedschool  2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Sure! Keep an eye out for when we start asking for requests!

  • @qurbanalihussaini123
    @qurbanalihussaini123 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you so much for all your support! It's my dream to get into a top US college.
    Could you please let me know what kind of students you are looking to help?
    Thanks a again ❤

    • @elevatedschool
      @elevatedschool  3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      We help all kinds of students - feel free to apply for a scholarship on our website: www.elevated.school/getstarted

    • @qurbanalihussaini123
      @qurbanalihussaini123 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@elevatedschool OK, thanks 😊

  • @YilackNovesta
    @YilackNovesta 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Wow! Such a beautiful lesson

  • @gobelfury
    @gobelfury 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Oh my goodness! You're such an amazing editor❤️

  • @kazishahjalal6852
    @kazishahjalal6852 ปีที่แล้ว

    Anyone can help me please. Can I use rhetoric questions in my common app essay?

  • @Darskhan-bz4v
    @Darskhan-bz4v 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You are amazing. This is what we need.1
    would love to get my essay reviewed by you🎉❤

    • @elevatedschool
      @elevatedschool  2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Keep your eyes peeled for updates in the next 2 weeks where we'll be announcing opportunities for FREE essay reviews!

    • @Darskhan-bz4v
      @Darskhan-bz4v 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@elevatedschool I am looking forward to it 😊

  • @angeliqueordonez5233
    @angeliqueordonez5233 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Great and helpful video

  • @veronicasvideodiaries
    @veronicasvideodiaries 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I appreciate the help (:

  • @ItungoShunem
    @ItungoShunem หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thanks alot.

  • @ethelyntaylor6349
    @ethelyntaylor6349 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Is this 500 words

  • @helendobbyn8739
    @helendobbyn8739 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thanks for the great information

  • @samihaislam5070
    @samihaislam5070 ปีที่แล้ว

    Can we send supplemental essays then?

  • @melhemhayek1328
    @melhemhayek1328 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thanks for the vid!

  • @carlahau698
    @carlahau698 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    yipeeee manifesting

  • @thatUni-guy
    @thatUni-guy ปีที่แล้ว

    I also have a family based essay

  • @chinar_talks
    @chinar_talks 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Hey, how can I connect you to use your essay checking service?

    • @elevatedschool
      @elevatedschool  11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      visit our website! www.elevated.school/editmyessay

  • @abibibiiiiii
    @abibibiiiiii ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you ❤

  • @Anindolentzelda
    @Anindolentzelda 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You’re an amazing editor! So talented

  • @stevenxiang3632
    @stevenxiang3632 ปีที่แล้ว

    great video, it was so helpful! Do you think using quotes in the essay is valid?

    • @elevatedschool
      @elevatedschool  ปีที่แล้ว

      I typically don't recommend it... but there's an exception to every rule!

    • @elevatedschool
      @elevatedschool  ปีที่แล้ว

      if you mean quotes from famous people, I'd probably avoid - but if you just mean quotes from characters (like dialogue) that's ok!

    • @stevenxiang3632
      @stevenxiang3632 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@elevatedschool thank you!

  • @grahamkwaker3584
    @grahamkwaker3584 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Let’s seeeee

  • @studded8054
    @studded8054 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    dang

  • @angiejlho
    @angiejlho ปีที่แล้ว

    cant wait!

  • @cottencandy8073
    @cottencandy8073 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Very helpful!

  • @muhammadmustafotojimamatov1172
    @muhammadmustafotojimamatov1172 ปีที่แล้ว

  • @ray1084
    @ray1084 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    this is awesome. hope you release more of these next week!

  • @jennykuo4430
    @jennykuo4430 ปีที่แล้ว

    So helpful!

  • @orbit5311
    @orbit5311 ปีที่แล้ว

    Is it possible to submit my essay for advice but not have it included in a video?