@@servantbee. ok, if you wanna split hairs: If you are a cop, you also don't have the right to stalk random people unless you have reasonable suspicion of them having committed or about to commit a crime and are on the clock right now.
@@f1mbultyryet a lot of them still do and use their databases to stalk and harass women they feel like. Happened to my sister and I at different times after presenting statements (car accident and burglary…) so yeah, they face zero consequences for abusing their power.
Can't help but think of Judy Garland and Marylin Monroe who destroyed themselves, and then of people like John Lennon and more recently Christina Grimmie who were LITERALLY KILLED by FANS. Yeah, they don't owe us shit. We collectively have to grow tf up and learn to appreciate the art, and show appreciation to the artist for their work in a way that is not so viscerally invasive to them as a person. Like yeah, sure you have some understanding and you "know" some parts of that person through their art and public appearances, but like everyone else, they also contain multitutes. You don't "know" them, only what they've chosen to share with the world. It's time for us to grow up.
I love what John Green said on Twitter: "People say 'she's not fit for fame' but literally no one is fit for fame now. The culture does not allow you to be known and safe at the same time, so you're in a constant state of vigilance and anxiety."
Best way of putting this!! Chappel roan is a musician and amazing artist and wanted to share her music, that does NOT mean she asked to be incessantly stalked online and in person.
“fame is abuse” is a concept i learned from the You’re Wrong About podcast about Princess Diana. it’s a short phrase that has reframed a lot of how i think about celebrities tbh
I think this is a good metaphor for people who don't understand: Imagine conventions. It's normal to ask cosplayers for pictures there and it's a part of life, UNTILL they take their costumes off. Then if you follow then home still asking for pictures, it's weird af.
Even if you don’t follow them home, if after a few days, you recognize them at a grocery store (shopping, not in cosplay)- going up to them to ask for a picture is creepy regardless of how “respectfully” you ask and regardless of their response.
It's great to ask permission for pictures at a con. It's still creepy and weird to stand about twenty feet away, very obviously pretending not to look, while holding a phone at an angle to get a picture without asking. This is one of the facets of cosplay is not consent. The other part, obviously, is touching without permission, or even pestering to get permission to touch. The worst I've personally seen was a Lady Dimitrescu on stilts with a _physical safety concern_ because men kept approaching her to grab her legs.
But that’s not and has never been how celebrities work. We don’t see someone in a movie and be like oh well I really liked that character but you know the actor isn’t playing them RIGHT NOW CURRENTLY so I guess I can’t ask for an autograph. Like that makes zero sense lol
In 2006-09 when Brittany Spears ran from paparazzi, crying and breaking down, people said "she shouldn't have chosen this career if she can't handle the public attention." Across the late 90's and early 00's when Jessica Simpson, Anna Nicole, Kelly Clarkson, America Ferrara, Jennifer Hudson were all relentlessly fatshamed, people said "they shouldn't have chosen this career if they can't handle the public attention." In 2006 when Pete Wentz's nude photos leaked and legitimate reporters were sharing them everywhere, including to his family, friends, and loved ones, and he expressed embarrassment and a desire for privacy, people said "he shouldn't have chosen this career if he couldn't handle the public attention." To this day, when celebrities ask people to not show up at their private homes, people say "they shouldn't have chosen this career if they can't handle the public attention." In 2016 a man set himself on fire and then took his life on the lawn of Miranda Cosgrove, making her stay with her parents for days on end because she could not feel comfortable and safe in her own home. Selena Gomez had a stalker break into her home after she repeatedly identified him as a threat, and she felt so unsafe she sold the home and moved. "Celebrity" and what fans "deserve" are social constructs. They change with time. The only way they change is if they're called out... or someone dies. I prefer Chappell Roan's approach.
And then 2 decades down the line everyone and their mothers look back and say “Britney deserved better, she didn’t deserve that” and yet… here we go again doing the same damn thing to another pop princess.
the only thing fans deserve is when a celebrity actually does something bad like promote a scam that results in fans losing their money (eg. Matt Damon and the crypto company he advertised for, or hell even the celebrities that promoted Fyrefest) or doubling down on bigotry/mistreatment of others. No one deserves the blatant dehumanisation that comes with becoming famous or popular
Björk got sent a nailbomb by a crazed stalker who was angry about her dating a black man and got dragged for punching a paparazzo who had been tailing her for weeks and tried to approach her son. People are so shockingly entitled when it comes to celebrities, particularly artists and performers, that it seems that they forget that they are human beings capable of fear and pain. Good on Chappell for drawing a line in the sand about wanting to be treated like a normal human being.
And on the guy’s funeral she still sent flowers to the family, because according to her, they still lost a family member and she sends her condolences.
exactly what i was thinking about, it's kind of sad we have some well known extreme cases in media (like björk's) and people still treats it as just some stan twitter drama...
Celebrities have been killed by crazed stalkers. That’s how we lost Christina Grimmie (Rest in peace) 🕊 Chappell has every right to protect herself, and anyone who’s angry at her over such a thing is super weird.
bjork had a near-miss in the nineties, where a mentally ill fan tried to mail her a bomb. thankfully it was intercepted. rebecca schaefer was killed by a stalker as well.
@@sh4rkb4itYes! Those are both extreme examples of why this behavior is creepy. I was thinking of her, but I forgot her name. It was Rebecca Schaefer- thank you!
I think the thing that pisses me off so much is that one person who commented that this is just the way that things are and it won't change anytime soon - like you could be that change! You could start acting differently around celebs! You could pump the fucking breaks and respect these people's boundaries! Be the change you want to see in the world etc
The irony is that if people did that, she wouldn't be as famous as she is. I'd never heard of her until she started complaining about being famous. It's a lot like the previously unknown comedians getting fame by complaining about being cancelled.
It’s strange to me that women always have to sugarcoat things to not offend people. The language Chappell used was straight forward and assertive, and people got offended. Good for her
a huge part that bothers me is that probably a lot of people invading her space are young women who say these exact same things to other people (women don’t owe you shit, she chose to wear a skirt she didn’t choose to be harassed/etc, creepy behavior is unacceptable, all of the logical things she said shown in this entire video), but since it’s woman to woman and one of those women is famous the logic suddenly is lost.
i ain't a swiftie but taylor was right when she said something along the lines of "when a woman does something, it's immediately seen as an overreaction"
@@MiasmicBlightThey didn’t say “only” they said “generally more.” If you don’t notice the ways women generally face more pressure to be “likeable” you’re most likely not paying attention. Having worked in customer service with both men and women, the difference in how they’re treated is abhorrent.
Usually yes, but there are some situation where you do have to take consent from someone. Like when you need to put a serial killer into prison, they probably won't consent.
@@lorenzreiher1407they don’t literally mean “never” with absolutely no exceptions, it’s more like “never (in a scenario like this)” as it pertains to the video, if that makes sense
@@megidolaon384 ? I never said anything about China, I just wanted to add some nuance to op's comment, which is conveniently placed above me if you want to reread it.
The idea that Chappel Roan isn’t cut out for stardom is reminiscent of women being told they’re not cut out for male-dominated fields because they won’t tolerate being harassed and assaulted. Telling women to accept their lot in life and to not try to improve anything doesn’t sit right with me.
TRUE! I’m a 23 NB (FtNB) and I work in marine biology + genetics research. I have been told this exact thing and have also been harassed & intimidated by significantly older colleagues, even professors. Sure it’s happened 2-3 times but that is 2-3 times TOO MANY!
@@radish6740 yeah sure but if you pay money to support her, you are not buying the right to invade her privacy. You’re also not paying for her “yes” to photos or interaction
@radish6740 entitled? Is she entitled to want privacy, for wanting peace of mind when she leaves the house? She is not entitled for wanting to feel safe, just like you and I aren't entitled for wanting the same thing. Nowhere in this did she say she didn't appreciate the support and love her fans give her, she explicitly said she doesn't condone or want the creeps of the world to all come flocking to her at every waking moment. She is still human. She is still like us. The only difference is that she made music that got popular. That doesn't make her any less valid or deserving of respect.
@@radish6740is there a reason you think buying an album gives you the right to someone else’s body, time and privacy? what the actual fuck is wrong with you
My favorite line was “this is not a group conversation” because someone’s personal boundaries are not up for debate. No one cares about your opinions on it. A human has a right to say no. Period. End. Fin.
Yes!! I only knew of Chappell very vaguely through a friend before this video, but she has my full respect after reading those lines of "I'm not looking for anyone's response. This isn't a group conversation." Honestly, for entitled fans who feel the need to give their commentary on everything, that is one of the most powerful things she could've done, she literally said I don't care if you don't like it lol. She gave a great example of how to set boundaries.
I feel like the only people who are actually mad at her are exactly the people she's calling out 😭 those are just the people the most chronically online so they make the most noise
@@Kittyka2345I saw 1 girl comment on all the videos. The SAME girl being mad. Saying she 'doesn't know who Chappell Roan is but Chappell Roan signed up for this'.
@@bees.857nah a lot of people on twitter are dragging her and saying she should be “grateful” bc they pay her bills. the entitlement makes me sick ppl are so disgusting
When you get to see her at a concert, you get what you pay for. When you buy her merchandise, you wear it and you got what you paid for. When she entertains you on social media, you get what you pay for. That's it. That's how far the exchange should go. If you expect her to accept your demanding access to her personhood and bodily autonomy, you're out of your mind. Her giving you her autograph, taking a picture with you is a bonus, not an entitlement. This is especially crazy considering how many celebrities have literally died from their fans.
To be fair this should also be said about JK Rowling to the fans who think she owes them a certain worldview or she should retcon certain characters to be LGBTQ
@@TEFFTPATTERN Nope, not the same. Expecting a person to be a descent human being and respect people different from yourself is not the same as expecting love, admiration and a higher level of appreciation from them just because you're a fan. It's like with Nicki Minaj being called out for marrying a registered sex offender and bailing her now convicted paedophile brother out of jail. We expect common human decency from ANYONE... not just a celebrity. You're making an apple and oranges argument here.
@@TEFFTPATTERN Again... I don't think she owes me anything as a fan of her books, but as a human being, she owes other human beings common decency. Am I speaking Spanglish? Anyone can call out another person for their wrong behaviour, she just happened to be famous and therefore, there are more voices calling out her behaviour. If I could dumb it down further, it's like saying nobody should expect Keanu Reeves, as a KKK member, to respect black people because his role in society ends with him being an actor.... that's stupid.
9:06 "I don't care that abuse and harrasment/stalking is normal for famous people." My mom used to say it best: "Just because it's common doesn't make it normal. Bad things are socially accepted sometimes. You're bigger than that.
Racism was socially accepted and so is misogyny in some places. Doesn’t make it right at all. She has ever right to say no and I’m sure all the celebs love her even more for saying something they never felt they could🎉
I'm so glad she bluntly said what fans of celebrities desperately needed to hear for decades. Sucks that some ppl felt offended+rejected. But to imply that those feelings should be more prioritized than someone's bodily autonomy+sense of safety is WILD
I kinda feel like most people these days are just inherently entitled, I think social media, same day delivery and other dopamine raisers has turned people into children in some ways honestly. It also doesn't help how we don't see celebrities like people, granted in some ways you can argue they aren't like us, but agreed everyone deserves bodily autonomy
@@devinkii1727it’s not new. Not even remotely. It’s just that we have a clearer lens to look at the fans now, and more ways for celebrities to talk directly to others through social media. It was arguably worse in the 60s and 80/90s with Elvis, the Beatles, Madonna, Michael Jackson etc etc. My mum experienced the complete bonkers situation of The Beatles in person at a concert when she was 11. It makes anything Chappell Roan is going through look normal, sadly. The only difference now is social media and people always have a camera on them and that has an amplifying effect on what has been a thing for a long time.
Obviously stalking is wrong, but caring about how others feel is a two-way street. If she's not worried about offending, then she can't say that people shouldn't be allowed to come up to her on the street. That's not stalking. That's not wrong. It's a request, because coming up to her on the street makes her feel uncomfortable.
@@chan_martin I honestly think that's going too far the other way, and comes off as hateful. The phrase "I'm not your friend" or "we're not friends" has long been what you say to someone who don't like at all. And the people I've heard say it onlin tend to be hateful with it. The line should be "we don't really know each other," in a kind tone. That's what it really is. People forget that they don't actually know the person on the other side of the screen.
@@bethanychatman9531emphasizing that she’s a female celebrity does not mean they think it’s okay to stalk and harass male celebs. “All lives matter”-ass comment
@@KaptainVincent I wouldn't say it happens to women more often. It's that people are more aware of when abuses happen to women than they do to men. Almost every male celebrity in the pop, rock, alternative, and K-Pop genres has been subjected to some form of fandom stalking and harassment.
@@rileysjonger4192 im not trying to deny what youre saying, but women are *more likely* to receive this sort of treatment than men, and often times it *is* women that feel unsafe in their homes because of fans who exhibit the creepy behaviour roan is criticising. claiming that people are more aware of when women are harassed than men is missing the point, and to be honest, comes across as you downplaying an actual issue not trying to fight you or anything, but i notice that this point is brought up a lot when people talk about female victims. "there are male victims too!" and "women are more at risk of being victimised" can be true at the same time
As an artist, she's already sharing A LOT with the public, way more than most of us ever will. Musicians do give a lot to listeners, and often set up events where meet and greets can happen. When they're off the clock, let them be. Would you want randoms asking for hugs at your job? Or demanding you do work while you're on your own time? Let them be people, and realize they don't know who you are, despite being able to know a lot about them.
john lennon was literally killed by a crazed "fan". he was just walking out of his apartment building with his wife when he was shot on the street. it is THAT easy, and i don't think anyone that hasn't reached that level of fame should tell her how to feel.
@@emiliasteilsson7910 exactly 😭 There are legit crazy people out there who will stalk and have intentions to harm someone, literally regardless if they’re famous or not
@@emiliasteilsson7910Selena is a little different because she had been working with that “fan” who she confronted for stealing money. But it’s still truth anyone can kill you, and when so many people are obsessed with you you never know who will go through with a plan
They view the artists as a product to consume. I mean yeah theres always going to be a certain level of consumerism when it comes to art and music, but i feel like stan culture has really amplified artists being treated like products for you to consume and not individuals creating art that they want to share with the world
@@hitfasthithardsome of it is mental ill behaviour, but a lot isn’t yet it’s still not acceptable. A lot of it just spills into people believing they’re owed something by someone they’ve never met because they gave them money and attention.
there is a video from a few years ago where chappell basically says “when i get famous and yall start being weird, i’m going to be a c*nt.” i feel like the people who are angry are also mainly the people she called out.
I agree, those that are complaining and hating on her are the one's she's specifically speaking to. They're the same that cross boundaries and do creepy ish.
@@turkeypedal I think you might be reading too deeply into it. When she said she’s going to be a c*nt she meant from the perspective of the people she’s setting boundaries with. Obviously she’s not going to be an awful person but THEY’RE going to view her as awful or a c*nt. Also I don’t think c*nt is a misogynistic slur, b*tch maybe but c*nt just means 4sshole tbh
@@turkeypedalother people are already ignoring how SHE feels though? i dont blame her for getting mean if she has to, i would probably be the same if people were doxxing my family, following me, touching me without permission, interrupting me while on a call to my therapist??! these are all things that have happened to chappell because of her fame, and being nice to the people being weird to her isnt going to solve the problem. people treat chappell not as if shes a human, but as if shes only there to entertain them and bend to their will. shes not saying that shes just going to be awful to everyone point blank, but that if people are going to be weird and creepy to her, shes not going to be nice back.
@@turkeypedal read the comment again. Chappell says she'll be a c*nt if the fans start "being weird". If y'all don't want Chappell to be a c*nt then don't be weird! It's that simple. I'm tired of weird behavior being rewarded with passive silence or long-suffering patience. It's time to fight back to the weirdoes (like Trump, JD Vance and all these delulu stans, cause they're all equally weird)!!!
The title had me SO nervous because you have a history of good takes and mature opinions. I’m happy that we feel the same. I actually paused to watch one of her performances and almost cried. This woman Loves making art and Loves performing her art. She deserves respect and kindness.
John Lennon was shot by a fan, Christina Grimmie was shot by a fan, Selena was killed by the president of her fanclub… It’s not unreasonable as a celebrity to be cautious of fans ESPECIALLY if they’re harassing and stalking you or your family.
@karinalumen9722 From what I have heard from interviews from family of Selena, Yolanda was very possessive of Selena and had a complete shrine of Selena covering her home from head to toe.
That Taylor argument infuriated me, because the casual fan forgets that she has been forced to get used to HUNDREDS of fans sitting OUTSIDE OF HER HOUSE WAITING FOR HER TO COME OUT. THAT’S SO FUCKED UP. Even Justin Bieber had this issue and when he called the fans out on it outside of his home, people thought that HE was being the asshole. For the love of god can we please bring personal shame and embarrassment back??
Taylor was a kid back in the days before social media became what it is today. It's sad to see that little girl who really didn't know what was coming and making the best of it, and then today seeing stalker photos of her at her home plastered all over social media.
it's also like...that's an 18 yo kid with a newfound fame that is talking. Ofc she'll have a bad take. All this proved is that the person posting it is immature.
Granted I don’t follow Taylor but didn’t her stalker(s) legit break into her home multiple times? And slept on her bed? And you have people shitting on Chappell for calling out creepy, parasocial behavior???
I guess people are more used to celebs that take advantage of stan and celebrity culture relentlessly. Ariana, Nicki, Eminem ironically, so on and so forth. Because she's seen as an "icon", or as she said herself "your favorite artist's favorite artist", people expect her to be the same. People expect her to be as shallow or self important, but the moment she places a very real and very important boundary, she's then shallow and arrogant in a way they don't like. It's kind of an opposite situation with Dogs Cat, with her calling her fans jobless just for having a fan name, and calling them stupid for liking her old "trash pop" music...as if her current music isn't the exact same stuff. But there's also the ingrained problem with paparazzi and obsessive reporters mainly going uncriticized for the stalking and surveillance they essentially do, and that being a thing (at least in america) for decades now. People want to know what a celeb's house looks like, what their kids are doing, their relationship status, all things that start out inherently unnecessary but quickly become creepy.
they are legit but its the question if you can uphold that boundrie and have any control over others. Its good she is at least saying it and hopefully this changes over time
She can do whatever she wants, but she’s being rude about it and people are allowed to call her out for that. Without those fans, she’d be no one. It goes both ways, respect does.
She is not a normal person. If she wants anonymity then she cant also be famous. Entitled rich white girls will cry if they cant have literally everything
Women shouldn't have to relinquish their autonomy to go for their dreams. So many women i know shrink themselves or let things happen that shouldn't in order to keep or further their career. No one should put up with that because it perpetuates the issue and makes it worse. So, i hope women and everyone else follow Chappell's example within their careers and lives and call out the BS and harassment
15:13 also chappell roan has been so intentional with separating her art and persona from herself….its not like she suddenly switched up. she’s been saying these things for years, even before she got this massive platform
Same thing with Beyoncé. She said recently she's worked really hard to keep her career and on-stage persona separate from her personal life and her family life. I love that people like Beyoncé and Chappell Roan are realizing that their mental health and their personal space is more important than pleasing their fans. As a performer myself, I know people-pleasing is part of the job, but not when it invades your privacy or puts you in danger in any way. Nobody knows me, I'm a small independent artist in a tiny town no one's heard of, I have 4 monthly listeners on Spotify, but I've had stalkers, and it's very unsettling, to say the least!
i think chappell is really cool for attempting to FINALLY set a standard for boundaries for celebs and their fans. there is no “thats the way it is” when we can actively change it
That goes for many things. It's amazing how many people have made up their minds they will never question anything their culture does or try to change anything...especially when so much should change.
ABSOLUTELY. I've been a crazed fan, that was pretty much the theme of my early teens... And I never understood why fans would WANT to act like this. I may have married someone in my head, but I understood that it wasn't reality 😅 that was before social media but I had been one of the lucky ones - I discovered a fan chat room where the lead singer/object of my obsession actually popped in occasionally. I felt like I was privileged to get updates straight from him before everyone else, so the LAST thing I would do is say something that would make him creeped out or scared off. If I could figure that out, anyone can. It's just the FANS who are "entitled" and need to realize they already get SO MUCH from celebrities. Maybe too much. But that's clearly an issue with society and it's not going to get better if those who are the victims of fan entitlement don't scream about it.
Didnt really vibe with her music at first, but she is just such a breath of freshair for the pop community. She has such a distinct vision that shes absolutely dominating. Most rising stars like her tend to keep quiet and let the fame ride in order to get people to like them, but she does NOT care. No doubt shes gonna change the industry, and I love her for it.
To quote good convention rules: “Cosplay is not consent!!!” That rule is easily used here; “Fame is not consent!” “Wealth is not consent!” “Yes,” “sure,” or “okay” is consent. And yes, consent can be revoked in *any* situation.
@@Youokhun “do you want to ride this rollercoaster?” “Sure. Sounds fun.” “Would you like a soda” “Sure. What kind do you have?” It *is* a form of consent. “Sure” is a conformation word. The definitions of “sure” are; 1. Confident, as of something awaited or expected. *I am sure we will win the game.* 2. Impossible to doubt or dispute; certain. *We have sure proof of his innocence.* 3. Bound to come about or happen; inevitable. *a sure victory for the team.* No version of this word is negative. If someone says “sure” but they don’t mean it, that’s a form of passive aggression. That’s a toxic person. “Do you want a soda?” “Sure” **gives soda** “Excuse me?!? You should have *known* I didn’t want a soda!!!!”
@@SilverRagaire anything other than a yes is a no. That is the consensus. Many English speaking countries say “sure” but it doesn’t always mean a 100% yes. It can actually show uncertainty
"This generation is so soft" is such a truly stupid thing to say. Fame isnt the same anymore, with social media and the internet, its way worse to deal with.
And there were always famous people struggling with mental health issues brought on by fame/crazy fans. This generation is finally speaking up and breaking the cycle! We should be proud of that ❤
Just now remembering when Justin beiber had to say “hey can you please not show up at my house?” And one of the girls was like “can I still have a hug?”
he was way nicer than i would've been too... Like i remember some situations where he wasn't too nice about it and ppl got upset at him. As if he's not literally being stalked.
all the "not cut out for it" and "this generation is so soft" crowd really needs to take a tally of all the musicians and perfomers of their respective generations who either took their own lives directly or OD'd trying to numb out how insanely unbalanced their lives had become. 27 club anyone?☹
ppl blame "this generation" because they're blind and don't want to take accountability for the fact that they actively perpetuate this type of behavior smh
The same people who say 'this generation is soft' are the same people who think drag shows/concerts shouldn't have kids in the audience. I wonder why they flip-flop their moral outrage like trying on a new outfit
"It's part of the job!" is such an insane way to defend other people's inappropriate behavior. I work in an extremely male dominated industry where sexism/misogyny is very much a common experience that sort of "comes with the job" but that doesn't mean it's okay?? Or that I should just be cool with it cause I like this kind of work
They’re basically outting themselves that they think people with whatever arbitrary amount of fame they decided was the line today don’t deserve basic human rights or respect because they say so. Imagine if we held this thought for every job. “Oh you got your hand cut off at the factory? Well maybe have you thought that that *comes* with being a factory worker, hm?” The absolute cognitive dissonance of some mfers….
Did we all forget Christina grimmy? Having random strangers come up to you while you are just trying to live your life is annoying and frightening. You don’t know peoples intentions or boundaries
Thats like if a factory worker complained about getting cancer from the things they work with and their boss just replies with that its “its just apart of the job”
During one of her concerts around 2016 someone yelled i love you at her and she went "thats sweet but you dont actually know me so dont say that" (or something like that) and tbh good for her
Same reason why Ethel cain deleted her tumblr. Fans felt entitled to her attention and wouldn't stop crossing boundaries. If people want their favorite celebrities to stick around and make more content, they shouldn't be purposely doing things to cross their boundaries. It's sad that people who want to make performance art are put through this.
People like “hmmmm but she still wants money right???” Yeah. If you want to listen to her music you pay to LISTEN TO HER MUSIC! Access to her body is not for sale. Her personhood is not for sale. Her autonomy is not for sale. Her MUSIC is for sale. Her PERFORMANCES are for sale. That’s it. Try going to wal-mart and telling the cashier that because you bought cheetos you also get the register. THE REGISTER IS NOT FOR SALE. Edit: people pretending this is literally only about ASKING to take pictures is are so predictable. Did y’all not watch the entire video??
Chappell is completely right. American celebrity culture is incredibly creepy and obsessive. It's a job. They're just normal people who happen to be entertainers. We need to stop putting these people on extreme pedestals.
it’s not only american celebrity culture. i think it’s a worldwide phenomenon bc look at how some stans dictate a kpop idol’s life. something needs to be done bc this is getting too crazy
@@dramaticvirghoe there are many cultures around the world where things like paparazzi, obsessive stalking, of celebrities and well-known individuals is actually a faux pas, and not considered socially acceptable.
@@VSytstolemyhandleforacorpi agree with you on that. there needs to be a cultural shift bc i’d hate to see this situation turn foul. artists like chappell roan need to be protected. doxxing and stalking is never okay
Chappell doesn't owe people hugs or her personal time. She's a performer so you get to watch her content, do official meet and greets, and come to see her shows. She doesn't owe anyone more than that. She's allowed to set her own boundaries. Imagine if you worked for Amazon and after hours people would come to your house, look through your windows, and ring the doorbell telling you that you needed to process their refund right now AND hug them. WTF? It's weird to expect that of anyone.
This is the line that is used on everyone asking to be respected. "You're a celebrity, get used to it", "you're a mom, get used to it", "you're a woman, get used to it", etc.
Have people forgotten that Christina Grimmie, Gianni Versace, John Lennon, Dimebag Darrell, and Selena, to name a few were killed by “fans”? Maybe they need to be reminded that Björk had an acid bomb sent to her by a “fan”, Jackson Wang got involved in a car accident after being closely followed by a “fan”, a deranged “fan” broke into Seo Taiji’s home and sat in his car. In November 2009 2PM’s Taecyeon had a letter sent to him written by a “fan” in menstrual blood, a month later Lee Joon from MBLAQ received a letter from a “fan” written to _him_ in blood, and then a month after that, a “fan” of Wonder Girls cut her wrist, and took photos of her slashed wrist and the message “come back Wonder Girls”. Or perhaps people need to be reminded that a “fan” once waited for actor Kristin Cavallari to leave the gym, followed her, and then told her that she had a flat tire, all before the flat tire alarm in her car went off. He had slashed it himself. A “fan” of Miranda Cosgrove shot a woman who looked like her, and then shot himself and set himself on fire _in her front garden_ One of Jodie Foster’s “fans” became so obsessed with her that he stalked her when she was studying at Yale, and then tried to assassinate Ronald Reagan. Trixie Mattel and Katya Zamo have repeatedly said that the trauma dumping done upon them by fans is unfair and stressful. Being a fan doesn’t entitle you to the time or the life of another person. Sure the examples listed above are extremes but to the person stalking or harassing a celebrity, they think what they’re doing is normal, and that’s why Chappell is completely 100% in the right to say that she wants to limit interactions with fans.
All of this. And to add one of the "classic" celebrities, Marilyn Monroe continues to be disrespected even after her death. She was entombed in a mausoleum and not only did a stalker/superfan manage to get himself entombed next to her because of his obsession, but the random-ass dude entombed above her PAID to be set face-down so he could be "on top" of her. Society needs an overhaul at this point.
So glad I’m not the only one who remembers all this wild “fan” (STALKER) behavior. And the sad thing is you didn’t even touch on all of them. It’s insane the entitlement some people have. And it honestly shows the lack of mental health awareness worldwide.
Technically Princess Di was killed by a crazed 'fan' too-- paparazzi but still was acting like a rabid fan like Taylor Swift was talking about those crazies in Nashville on Highway 65 driving with one hand and trying to take a video for clout with the other hand--I'm surprised Swift didn't end up like Princess Diana with the amount of drunk drivers here in Nashville
I used to do music as a teenager. Like competitions on a local, state, national, and international level, doing paid gigs, etc. I knew a lot of other people my age who did the same and some went on to get record deals. I chose to stop my dreams of music entirely at 18 because I started being stalked by a man who was VERY upset i wasn't dating him. Full on showing up at my shows, my school, and my home. I was by no means famous, barely a known person in the circles i performed in, but because i put myself out in the world a person felt entitled to my time, energy, body, and life. I had to move, first across town and later out of state. I stopped doing music so it wouldn't be advertised where i was. I stripped every video of myself off the internet i could. And he DID NOT GIVE UP. After a year of being genuinely scared he would follow through on his threats to break into my home, violate me, kill me, and destroy my body, i dropped out of college and moved 3 states away. I cannot imagine how awful it would be on a greater level
Thank you for sharing this?! People forget that ANYONE can be stalked, and celebrities especially can have a harder time keeping them away due to how schedules are visible to the public. Hence why this behavior is COMMON but should NOT be normalized. I'm sorry you went through that, however, and I hope you're okay 🫂
Did we all forget how billie was treated in her documentary? Chappell Roan is 100% in the right. Leave celebs alone. They don't know you, you don't know them.
Another aspect to this-Chappell is open about being a lesbian, but that doesn’t mean all her superfans are queer. Recently I saw a short video of a fan who coincidentally was on the same plane as her, and that fan mentioned how there were several men at the gate who seemed to be there bc they were following her, luckily she had security with her so she was protected. Still, as a lesbian myself the mere thought of having random men know of my sexuality, know my name *and deliberately follow me* would honestly make me fear for my life/physical wellbeing. Like, especially as a famous queer person I imagine there’s also the aspect of “is this an overexcited fan with poor boundaries or am I about to get hate-crimed??” Edit to clarify (bc I didn’t anticipate that my quick comment would get much attention): my comment was about the added aspect of lesbiphobia that applies here. Yes, obsessive stalker fans can be of any gender/sexuality. However, I singled out cishet men here bc Chappell appears to have male cishet stalkers and she‘s openly living as a lesbian. Lesbiphobia can vary between openly aggressive & volatile vs. more covert, a cishet man obsessively stalking an open and proud lesbian will most likely be of the openly aggressive kind. The one where a man is deeply offended that a woman he’s attracted to refuses to be sexually available to any man, *even him*. It’s a mix of a predatory challenge, a sense of entitlement, and contempt for the blanket rejection (that stings double when they believe that your sexual orientation is just a choice you “frivolously” made), often with the added feature of discriminatory fetishisation. If you’re not a queer woman you might not comprehend where in this explanation the difference to “regular” sexual harassment is, but as a lesbian who only started living openly “later in life” and was previously perceived and treated like a straight woman, I promise you there is a difference. I have never felt unsafer around men than I do now, including the times where I was still deeply closeted and found myself in unsafe situations with a straight man.
Dude me being a nobody and a (masc presenting) lesbian already scares the heck out of me when I'm out there alone, I fear for my life. I can't even imagine being in her shoes, having so many people knowing who you are being THAT famous. People these days just make shit up to hurt each other for no reason, I'd be paranoid at all times. lol
The guys could be gay also. But yes. And as a straight woman, same. And there are very dangerous women out there, too, don’t assume they are ALL men because the majority are. Stay safe sister. ♥️✌️🗳️🟦
ANY PERSON setting boundaries and demanding they be respected is so valid. It's THEIR boundaries, it's their autonomy, it's their body and their space. Good for her, she's holding people accountable and shining a light on toxic ass behavior. Celebrities are people. Period.
Chappell Roan isn't entitled. She said "fame isn't worth this" and that she'd drop the fame to stop this fear and discomfort. "I'll stop doing any of this if I need to get security." That's not entitlement.
Im sorry, she soent 10 years trynna be famous and then said that. Dont forget, she totally knew what the industry eas like before she entered. Im not saying she has to deal with it but then she shouldnt have tried so hard
@@SpaceBoyDigitalshut up, one works hard to get the work done, not to get stalked. Stop being a weird entitled stain of a human. Fame shouldn’t be the price of being great at your job, only the people unable to achieve anything worthy for themselves are the ones that believe so. Stop being a creep.
the decent response to a "no" when u ask a celebrity for a picture is to just go "ok! im a huge fan, have a wonderful day" or smth along those lines, its not that hard edit: the fuck is going on in these replies get out of my house (/j)
I dont think most people who are mad at her disagree with this sentiment. I think they agree that Chappelle has the right to decline, the thing they take issue with her lumping in the act of asking a celebrity for a picture with "creepy stalker behavior". Like the issue they are having is specifically framing simply asking for a picture as inherently creepy and immoral, regardless of how respectful the fan is if the celeb declines
@@botanicalitus4194 Like Chappell says herself, "if you have a problem with me asking you to not stalk me, stalk my family, touch me, or get pissed when I say 'no' to a hug/picture that THAT IS A YOU PROBLEM" She shouldn't have to feel bad that somebody thinks that Chappell is talking about them when she says "creepy"-- just stop being creepy #simple
@@botanicalitus4194she wasn't talking about respectful sane fans. She's talking about the creepy weirdos who can't take no for an answer, or get offended that she declined. If normal fans are getting upset over that, then it tells me they must be very young and don't understand what she said in her video explaining it, cause it's pretty clear what type of person she was describing: the stalker creepy weirdo kind.
Yeah what’s sad is it’s been going on well before the sick harassment Britney went through. Like Bjork’s stalkers attempt to harm her with an acid bomb that actually reached her residence! Or even John Lennon was killed by a stalker fan just leaving his apt. So scary and sad
The people who say this shit about Chapell will scream “FreeBritney” while claiming they didn’t play into her downfall in the 2000s. Hindsight is 20/20 and somehow nobody sees the fault in themselves…interesting.
Do people genuinely think that once someone is well known they are no longer human? Old stars (especially in the 60s-80s) would constantly od and off themselves from the stress that she's asking people to stop putting on her.
Absolutely. The whole “they signed up for this” mentality is so entitled and shameless. Cannot believe people are arguing the morality of policing other people’s boundaries.
I think saying “ do not ask me for a hug “ is better than saying “ it is weird to ask me for a hug “ . Like people in real life that ive spoken to for not too long have asked me for hugs before and I don’t automatically think they’re creeps for that . I think it’s irresponsible for D’Angelo to make such a bold statement like that . People are different just bc he has obviously has issues with being touched doesn’t mean everyone does
@@lalaland7961 Most of us are smart enough to know what he means. He's not responsible for anyone's understanding of how basic boundaries work. We're listening to him because he's a fun creator to listen to, not because he's our appointed moral guide.
@@f1mbultyr what the heck I’m not tone policing . I didn’t say she’s not a victim bc I don’t agree with one thing she said … learn what words mean before use please !
@@brett8259no, you have issues if you don’t hold the people who you give money as a hobby to some degree of moral responsibility. You’re out of your mind if you can willingly SUPPORT and FUND a person who’s doing completely reprehensible stuff behind their art. That’s literally the mindset that gets these athletes and frat boys out of criminals charges. Because they’re talented and making people money. Ridiculous.
@@PeripheralVisionary. " It is important that we extend the same boundary and societal expectations to Roan that applies to Bezos." People also shouldn't be stalking Jeff Bezos and then getting pissed at him for saying no to a picture/hug.
Anthony Mackie is well known for not taking random photos out and about. If he is not being paid to be there and do it, he doesnt. Someone tried to call him out once and was dragged bc it's so common knowledge. Celebrities deserve to feel safe, and we need to evolve as fans...period.
@@zoeisonline its controversial bc its not seen as normal for the fan celeb parasocial relationship most celebs agree to i give you art you give support i show my appreciation for you as a fan by taking a pic with you or talking with you or hug etc .
Same thing with Cillian Murphy, and MC Ride from Death Grips. It's not celebrities in general, because it seems like it's specifically young celebrities, especially women.
Ah yes, Chappell Roan is EXTREMELY ENTITLED for... *checks notes*... wanting her basic need for privacy, security, and basic human autonomy to be respected. How DARE she set boundaries and want to be treated with basic respect as a human being! This is an OUTRAGE!
As a woman who is *not famous* at all, and maybe the only agnostic on chappell roan (based on how famous she is), I can validate what she is saying 100%. I am a victim of stalking, and that is only one person interacting with me like this. I cannot imagine if my stalker were multiplied into hundreds without me knowing about them. Terrifying.
One of the most famous people George Harrison said "They [fans] gave their money, and they gave their screams. But the Beatles kind of gave their nervous systems. They used us as an excuse to go mad, the world did, and then blamed it on us." Fame sounds exhausting and honestly I think the majority of celebrities agree with Chappell Roan. Fans are not entitled to a celebrity's time or gratitude.
And people seem to have forgotten that George was stabbed 40 times by a fan in his own home. The only reason he lived is because his wife beat the guy with a lamp. His cancer was in remission at the time, but 18 months after the attempted murder, George was dead.
Even when I was a child, I always felt bad for famous celebrities especially in the 2000s paparazzis? Sheesh. Hard to understand how a child had more empathy towards these people than the grown adults now
People saying she “asked for this” is especially unhinged, because I’d be willing to bet money she didn’t dream of her and her family being STALKED? Also she wanted to make music… not to be watched by millions of people… The fact that the Industry requires the latter to justify giving you the ability to do the former isn’t her fault??????????🤨
Being stalked? No. Harrassed? Obviously not Being recognized and people wanting to talk to her? That's what fame is. Yeah, maybe she doesn't want to talk, and she has a right to say that, but people are going to come up to her. And, FYI, I don't know this woman. I'm not going to go up to her because I wouldn't even recognize her. I'm not saying this out of my entitlement. Just what I think is reasonable. Fame means people recognize you and want to interact with you.
@@turkeypedalshe’s not saying there’s anything wrong with recognizing her or interacting with her. she’s saying ppl need to respect her physical boundaries and remember she is a human being and deserves to be treated as such.
the fact that her fans doxxed pretty much her entire family is so horrifying. i hope everybody stays safe. also i feel like it must be so difficult for her to adapt to this sudden fame. not until long ago she struggled to pay her rent and now she is one of the most popular singers in the world? thats crazy. it must be so hard to go about her daily life, especially as nobody in her family or close friends is a celebrity. like she is not hanging out in gated communities or at beach resorts but at regular places where she is constantly exposed to her fans.
@@turkeypedalno one is even entitled to speak to her in public. I would never approach any celebrity unless it was at one of their shows and it was allowed. Why? Because I know these people just want to live too. They’re famous, but that does not make it so that I’m entitled to them as a person whenever I see them in public. They are fully allowed to have boundaries and should also be allowed to expect those boundaries to be respected because they are PEOPLE!!!
I saw a comment on her recent Instagram story thanking people saying she is now "dragging it out" as if telling people to not stalk you and your non famous family has an expiration date. Chappell Roan is 100% in the right and I am glad she has put up her boundaries stan behaviour can be terrifying.
I had a situation where I was walking down the streets last month and saw a celebrity. They were really kind and said yes to a picture, but by the time I had taken the picture, a crowd had formed behind them and my family and I agreed that they looked a little uncomfortable. So, now I'm thinking a lot about this chappell statement. I felt so sorry for that celebrity I took a picture with on the street, but those people forming a line behind them wanted to take a picture. Just like I had. My thought process before I asked for the picture was "well, I'm never going to see them again, might as well ask for a picture", as if they were a rarely-seen tourist attraction. That's just such a weird way of thinking about a person
@@2b00bsjohnson I worked in late night for 7 years. I never asked for a photo or went up to them unless I got explicit permission from talent (which I only asked for once for my favorite actor) and every other interaction was like just kind of in passing. for example once in a while I worked in the green room and so it would just be a constant battle in my head of whether to make conversation or just leave them alone. I'm not ashamed of my actions (I always made the right choice and suppress whatever it is I actually want to do) but I am ashamed of the desire itself, plus it makes me sad to know that my faves would lose respect for me if my love and appreciation for them ever came to light. It sends me into a depression spiral every time I think about it.
@@2b00bsjohnson actually I did get too drunk at the wrap party and talk to someone that I probably should have not talked to, had a panic attack right after and ubered home and cried for like 8 hours straight. but I woke up to discover that after I went home all of my coworkers got photos with them so I was like okay, I guess going up and saying hi was actually not that bad in comparison? but yeah that was probably the most guilty I've ever felt in my life. but I was so drunk
The clip of 18-year-old Taylor Swift is extra misplaced because of how publicly she’s been speaking about the fear and discomfort she experiences at her level of fame. There’ve been so many news articles about freaks breaking into her homes and even sleeping in her bed. She said in 2019 that she keeps military-grade clotting bandages with her in case she or loved ones get shot or stabbed. Artists like Christina Grimmie, Selena, and John Lennon were killed because deranged weirdos held unfounded delusions about the celeb’s fame and person. The reactions to chappell’s statements are so bonkers to me.
Great comment but you’re wrong about Selena. Yolanda wasn’t just a fan, she was employed by her, got caught stealing money, and killed her out of anger for confrontation or responsibility.
taylor swift can't even go to and from places within the stadium while she's touring!! she literally is driven around in a box disguised as cleaning supplies.
@@Petrichorus- I feel like it’s even worse that she got personally close to her and then killed her ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . if anything, that emphasises the point chappell’s point about how scary and dangerous it is for people to feel entitled to celebrities’ lives (literally and figuratively).
@@johanabi yes it proves Chappels point that fans are dangerous, but you lumping in Selena’s killer with others as having “unfounded delusions” about Selena is still _huge_ misinformation. She wasn’t a crazy Selena worshipper, she was fan who used her position to become a thief and then killed Selena due to greed, not some obsession over her. I understand that you weren’t aware of this which is why I commented a correction, because Chappell is correct to not trust strangers but I don’t want people to twist Selena’s tragedy to make it something it’s not. The tragedy is that she trusted someone who handled her business, not that someone was bananas over her.
I took the way Chappell said "random person" as just someone you have no relationship with. She's not your family, your friend, your coworker, your acquaintance, anything. She is a random person to her fans, just as we are random people to her.
I don’t think celebs owe us a single thing when they’re not working. If they’re out and about in their day to day life they should be left alone. I live in NYC and have seen dozens of celebs in the last 11 years and for everyone who lives here there’s an unspoken rule that if you see a celeb in a bodega you can give them a smile and a nod, maybe a “hey love your work” and that’s as far as it goes. Sometimes the celebs will say “do you want a picture?” And if they offer them cool! But oftentimes they’re just trying to buy a bagel and appreciate being left alone. I’ve seen Mark Ruffalo, Tim Gunn, Kate Mulgrew, Samira Wiley, Lucy Liu, Orlando Bloom, Billy Porter and a few others over the years. You just let them be because they were literally all just trying to get errands done. Kate Mulgrew was at a butcher shop in my neighborhood. Lucy Liu was eating dinner at a restaurant I was a hostess for, and told me she liked my leggings so I gave her a big “thank you, I love your movies!” And let her eat her dinner in peace. I’m fully on Chappell’s side.
“She has every right to say no, BUT-“ “Yes people encroach upon your space and that’s bad, BUT-“ “Set the boundaries you need to set, BUT-“ do these people not hear themselves?? she’s asking to be treated respectfully and people are tying themselves in knots to justify why she’s not allowed that basic human dignity. it’s very plain and simple victim blaming. Chappell (and D’Angelo 💞) are 1000% correct in their assessments. this common behavior of stan communities is deranged and should be treated as such.
The bjork stalker incident from 1996 haunted me and really started my shift in how I see celebrities and their fans/the press. That and watching the many downspirals of young women who were celebrities in full public view. It's nothing less than cruel when you add everything up. One person asking for a photo is a novelty. The multitudes of entitled fans after a certain point becomes unfathomable
I think comparing invasive superfans to the 'where my hug at' dudes is the best take on this ive heard so far in all the discourse. Imagine the entire world coming at you like a where my hug at dude. Terrifying
I don't. They're very different. Not in the one is worse than the other, but that both can be okay, and both can be bad, for different reasons. The "where's my hug" guy is fine if they know you. The superfan is fine if they stay within certain boundaries.
@@turkeypedalthe issue with "where my hug at" guy is the entitlement. if you have an established boundary with someone where you hug them it is obviously fine. but pressuring someone to hug you by asking "where's my hug" is not okay and can make people very uncomfortable. i think you have a misunderstanding of what a "where my hug at" guy is lol
@@mppiyeah that was actually the only part of the video i disagreed with lol. i think fans that ask for hugs without considering "no" an acceptable response are like "where my hug at" dudes, but outside of that entitled approach its good practice to me. i guess i see it as checking if it would be an invasion of personal space rather than asking to invade... tho since chappell roan has established she does not like it, it would def be weird to ask at all now lmao
@@nicolejustkidding8662but why are you asking to hug and be in physical contact with someone you don’t know? like it’s still entitled, maybe not to the same degree as the “where my hug at guy”, to think just because you indulge in someone’s art that means asking for physical contact with them as a stranger is okay.
@@azari_osaka well humans are empathetic by nature, so while its not my cup of tea lol, there's a few scenarios i can think of where ppl who dont know each other connect on something and hug. like i've seen someone having a bad day and a stranger offers a hug. or a a person receiving an act of kindness from a stranger and they ask to hug them in thanks. or even something silly like two people wearing the same shirt and they ask to hug excitedly. i think it's weird for sure to think you deserve a hug in those moments. but to want one and to ask for one, to me, is saying "hugging would be a good experience for me right now, would it be one for you too?" so i guess i see the question in itself establishing that you dont know the person, or even just their feelings on being hugged. if that makes sense 😅 however it is absolutely creepy to walk up to an artist and ask for a hug without talking to them first, like what happened to hello? how are you? my name is? lmao
Let's think about WHY it was normalized to scream at, touch, run after, photograph etc celebrities. Because they were set as PRODUCTS. Because a label or an agency or a studio behind them would profit from this kind of behavior. By taking her carreer on her own hands Chappell, as well as Taylor, Kesha and others are breaking this awful pattern AS THEY SHOULD.
Current Taylor would definitely empathize with Chappell. Thirtyfour-year-old Taylor Swift doesn't feel the same as 18-year-old Taylor Swift about fame. She released this diary entry from 2013: (WARNING, this is long) "This week, I spent most of my time watching TV, some of it swimming in the pool, a significant amount of time feeling incomplete, then wondering why because I have the life I’ve always wanted. Then hating myself for feeling in any way ungrateful for this mostly perfect life. But this mostly perfect life can feel a lot like being a tiger in a wonderful enclosure. It’s pretty in there, but you can’t get out. It’s peculiar to me that after all these years, I still get so anxious when I see a group of people staring, amassed outside my house, pointing, camera phones up … They could never imagine how much that feels like being hunted. And no matter how big my house is or how many albums I sell, I’m still going to be the rabbit. Because the hunters will always outnumber me. The spectators will stand by, shaking their heads, going “That poor girl.” But the point is, they’re still watching. Everyone loves to watch a good hunt. I worry for my generation and the ones after that because they will never truly experience a moment without attempting to capture it and own it. I am of the generation where you see a beautiful flower growing up through the cracks in the sidewalk, and you pick it. You take it with you to show everyone you know. Whereas I think our ancestors might come upon a beautiful flower and stop and think ‘Wow. That is really beautiful.“ Nevermind that picking a flower kills it, the same way taking a picture of a moment can ruin it altogether. They needed to possess things. They need photographic proof that they were there. They need to then post that photo online so their friends can see it. So that they can spend all day checking the comments underneath. That level of possession worries me." She's also written about not feeling cut out for the pop girlie life in her song The Lakes: "I'm not cut out for all these cynical clones, these hunters with cell phones."
Oh man that’s so sad. Especially knowing how that was light compared to her life now. I think people really need to stop and think about what it must be like to be hunted like these super famous celebs are. I am 100% on Chappell Roan’s side and I’m so glad she came out and said it. I bet the Taylor of today cringes that she ever did that interview.
And her song I Know Places from 1989. The lyrics are literally “they are the hunters we are the foxes…..I know places we won’t be found and they’ll be chasing their tails trying to track us down”
My goodness I’m so glad to see such level headed people cause x formerly known as twitter is just a mess of parasocials and freaks on a hate train for this poor woman. Thank you so much dangelo I hope you have a blessed day ❤
It's so sad how she looks uncomfortable around her own fans. I've never seen an artist and a fanbase have such opposite vibes. She asked them to stop calling her mother because it made her uncomfortable and if you open her comment section it's all they say. They bark at her during very emotional moments of her show like it's funny. They turn everything she says or do into a meme like a humiliation ritual. Just weird.
Chappell has every right to set her boundaries with fans and she shouldn’t need to really sugarcoat it. It really shouldn’t be difficult for people to understand when she made her opinions clear.
Agree with the first part, but not the second. She should care about the feelings of her fans if she's asking them to care about her feelings. And one way that happens is that you "sugarcoat it."
@@turkeypedal...the entitlement is wild. anyone engaging in invasive behaviour absolutely does not need or deserve to have boundaries "sugarcoated". use common sense and be respectful or get rightfully told off
@@turkeypedal "You should be gentle and sensitive, or people are allowed to disregard your request for safe boundaries" You're literally a talking red flag.
@@turkeypedal if they're stalking and harassing her, they've already demonstrated that they don't care about her feelings. Therefore, it's not illogical to assume she should have no reason to give a damn about theirs. If someone's hurt by what she said then it says more about them than her.
I think what Chappell is doing is extremely necessary. As a society we place celebrities on such a pedestal. Just because someone is known for their art, doesn’t mean that they owe you shit. I think people should be allowed to be known for their job and nothing else and literally any person should be allowed to put boundaries in place, ESPECIALLY when it comes to safety. The fact that this is even an argument is so weird to me.. I wish it was normal to see a celebrity out & about doing normal shit like being at the supermarket and being like “oh that was Chappell roan, dope I love her music” and then move the fuck on with your day. The confidence people have to harass especially online is just such a gross and bizarre thing we have deemed as “normal” just because you think you know someone because of their job. If she dips off the music scene these fans only have themselves to blame
that is a very strange twisting of the narrative. Yolanda Saldívar wasn't some fan, she was literally Selena's employee - she was the manager of her boutiques and registered agent in San Antonio. And Selena was murdered because she fired Saldívar after finding out she was embezzling from both of her official Selena branded positions. Selena's murder was not some crazy stalker fan, it was it was an attempt at extortion by a business associate that escalated - She was meeting Saldívar to retrieve financial records Saldívar had been refusing to turn over, at the time of her death.
It was also her BEST FRIEND! If a “best friend” can do something so vile, what is stopping a complete stranger? I’m not saying she should be paranoid, but the wariness is definitely warranted!
Its crazy that people are using Taylor Swift as an example of "Oh look that's how you adjust with being a celebrity" when she has mentioned time and again in interviews and through her songs that she doesn't like this stuff! also in that clip, she is 18, and she is trying to convince herself that she chose this life so she has to live with the consequences! but what about her mentioning ""I'm not cut out for these hunters with cell phones"
people using taylor swift as an example of being well adjusted to fame seem to forget her disappearance during rep era. once that fame gets turned against you, it can be incredibly dangerous. people go from asking for hugs and selfies to death threats real quick. edit: to clarify, i think asking for hugs is gross behavior 100% but it's weird behavior that has a more "positive connotation" to it if that makes sense. cus people see it as fans being "sweet" but it's still a breach of personal space
I have a famous relative. They have to tell themselves things to help them deal with their reality. It sounds cool to be famous, until you personally know a famous person and realize that the lack of privacy can be absolutely miserable. My relative can’t even just go to the grocery store without weird randos taking their pic. We used to love going on late night runs to the store to get ingredients to make brownies, cookies, whatever we were feeling. I know it sounds so dramatic but I mourn the life I had before anyone knew my relative, when we could take our late night trips, be silly, do whatever we wanted as young free kids.
I similarly have a famous family friend, who hasn't really been in the zeitgeist since the 80s (but there is a non-0 chance of hearing them on any given day) and looks practically unrecognizable. When I finally met them as an adult, security was *tight*, even as a massive group we had a security detail because they were with us. But even having known them my whole life as "that famous person," the security detail, and seeing them right off the stage, it was *so easy* to see them as just a normal person that you could sit across the table from and talk about anything with. Though from the second hand experience I know it may not happen, or won't for a long time, I hope that some day things calm down and you can have another late night run with them.
Thank you for sharing your experience. I can't imagine just losing the opportunity to roll up to your favorite coffee shop after you become famous. Because people will stake it out just to see you/mob you. There's that concept of 3rd spaces; a space after your home and work space (office/studio/etc.) A bookstore, or even grocery store can be that third space that helps give your life space, breadth and opportunity for fun like you and your relative. Losing 3rd spaces can be alienating especially when fame at such a massive scale essentially strips it away from you.
genuinely it is so confusing to me how people can sit here and have all of the resources to see the pattern of people in the industry being stalked and harassed to the point of death and still think this behavior is okay. like this is something that’s been documented time and time again. chappell has EVERY right to place boundaries that protect her from that.
she said at the beginning her art was DRAG, complete art/artist separation. y’all don’t go around calling bob the drag queen a cvnt for saying no to a picture so why is she any different 😭😭😭
Actually entitled fans do go around calling anyone and everyone with even the smallest bit of following a cvnt for not listening to them. Celebrity culture is completely fucked
I know what you’re angling at, but tbh the misogyny is equally dished out here. When drag queens refuse photos, hugs, etc, people get mad at them because they subconsciously still expect anyone remotely feminine to be overly accommodating, nicey-nice and compliant with requests. Even small-scale performers. Its not as different to women in the entertainment industry as ppl might hope 😭
I'll say it. Drag fans are some of the most delusional people. I watched someone have a crying meltdown outside a drag show because they didn't get enough time with the queens. In the voice of Trixie Mattel, "Mary, you're one of 200 people in line for this meet and greet. This isn't the 'Only I meet and greet the cast' show.' " Like it's after the show and they're tired, about to move on to the next city. Say your quick piece and go. They're not your damn therapist.
i think Dolly Parton handled this best. You see, the trademark platinum blond has always been a wig. And she always appears to us dressed to the nines. But Dolly REALLY has brunette hair. And she goes out all the time and lots of people just don't see her because she is wearing "normal" clothes. She has been married for ages and is always out with her husband. I do think its awful that i am even saying this and i know it wouldnt work with someone like Taylor or Chappel now. I have seen lots of celebrities and purposefully did NOT approach them. I think people who do mob celebrities have no manners.
Chapell doesn’t have red hair though. Her name isn’t Chappell. The difference between her and Dolly is not their strategy, it’s the access their fans have to information. There are people who post her real name and her private social media as if they won a game for finding it.
as awesome for Dolly as that is, it’s important to not fall into the habit of blaming the celebrity. fans should respect simple boundaries, celebrities shouldn’t have to go out of their way to keep themselves safe
I think the major difference is Dolly didn’t come into fame at the height of social media dependency. Everything got exponentially worse after Covid with chronically online behavior. Even Taylor didn’t have that when she was 17-18, not like it is now. Chappell exploded in 4 months, had no adjustment period, and probably didn’t even have a security team in place until recently.
"Guys don't follow me around, harass the people in my life and try to learn every small detail about my life. Just enjoy my work and leave me alone." God she's such a diva, who does she think she is requiring privacy? 🙄
On a much smaller scale, when I was pregnant, strangers would walk up to me and put their hands on my belly. Some would ask, others would just do it. They felt entitled to touch me. It’s just so weird. I could not deal with fame. I feel sorry for them and will never understand people who lose their shit over celebrities or feel like they are entitled to anything involving another human being, especially a stranger.
The way regular physical boundaries with pregnant women just go out the window is weird as hell!! I don't think I could handle that. The list of people I am comfortable with touching me is short.
Wow that's crazy that anyone would think that was okay to touch you like that without your consent just bc you're visibly pregnant, damn people need to learn boundaries that is so freaking weird, I'm sorry you had to deal with that!
the “i made you famous, you’d be nothing without me, you owe me for everything you have” attitude is abuser shit, hate to say it. i feel bad for the people in these “fans” personal lives.
i don't understand why the word consent isn't being used more in this conversation! consent matters just as much for photos and physical touch for her as it does for anybody else.
@@reda-exeit’s important to point out for sure! Most people also don’t seem to understand boundaries. They think they’re more important and deserve to take up this persons time. It’s so gross.
i’m SO grateful beyoncé set clear boundaries back in 2012. there is NO parasocial relationship, she makes it clear she is the ARTIST and y’all are the fans. she has complete control over when y’all receive products to consume, how much access and insight she gives into her life, and when she disappears again. y’all do NOT know that lady!
@@carolitoffananot even a “you’re peasants I’m a queen” mentality. It’s literally were strangers. She’s cordial and grateful but she makes sure boundaries are CLEAR
that part! @fkfkfkl09505 she constantly sends out gifts to fans, pays their rent/ tuition, expresses her love & gratitude EVERY time she sees them on stage, posts them on her website, etc etc. but she’s always made it clear they’re STRANGERS and to respect her privacy/space - and it worked!
I’m 53 and I’ve never been lured into parasocial relationships. I’ve always been someone who just consumes content full stop. I think I’ve always recognized that PEOPLE create that content and they are HUMAN. I have enough with my real life/social humans who are lovely and complex and engage with me. I don’t have interest in the strangers who create media I may enjoy. The only basic exceptions if you call it that- are comments that boost algorithms but I always see that more as engagement with the community at large. Everyone is entitled to their boundaries- always have been - hope we start honoring them soon.
the only thing chappell has done wrong is not release a music video for 'good luck, babe' 😔
- me, from the main channel
real
the official lyric video feels like a baby sensory video which is pretty sick
so true 😔
I'm terrified for the day you don't upload and stop this streak you have going
Yes.
No one has the right to stalk people.
Yeah. It’s ridiculous that it needs to be said out loud.
@@servantbee. ok, if you wanna split hairs: If you are a cop, you also don't have the right to stalk random people unless you have reasonable suspicion of them having committed or about to commit a crime and are on the clock right now.
@@servantbee. So you need to correct everyone but then don't feel the need to be correct in your correction? You seem like a very unlikeable person.
No seriously it’s literally illegal! 😭😭
@@f1mbultyryet a lot of them still do and use their databases to stalk and harass women they feel like. Happened to my sister and I at different times after presenting statements (car accident and burglary…) so yeah, they face zero consequences for abusing their power.
"This generation is so soft" Like stars in old Hollywood weren't constantly overdosing on drugs and killing themselves from stress
Exactly.
Like there weren't stories of old Hollywood actresses breaking paparazzi cameras in order to be left alone.
This! And now there's this added expectation of new celebs doing the parasocial relationship spiel just because they're active on social media.
Can't help but think of Judy Garland and Marylin Monroe who destroyed themselves, and then of people like John Lennon and more recently Christina Grimmie who were LITERALLY KILLED by FANS.
Yeah, they don't owe us shit. We collectively have to grow tf up and learn to appreciate the art, and show appreciation to the artist for their work in a way that is not so viscerally invasive to them as a person. Like yeah, sure you have some understanding and you "know" some parts of that person through their art and public appearances, but like everyone else, they also contain multitutes. You don't "know" them, only what they've chosen to share with the world. It's time for us to grow up.
As if Björk didn't literally jump a journalist who had been following and harassing her for weeks
I love what John Green said on Twitter: "People say 'she's not fit for fame' but literally no one is fit for fame now. The culture does not allow you to be known and safe at the same time, so you're in a constant state of vigilance and anxiety."
This!
Best way of putting this!! Chappel roan is a musician and amazing artist and wanted to share her music, that does NOT mean she asked to be incessantly stalked online and in person.
“fame is abuse” is a concept i learned from the You’re Wrong About podcast about Princess Diana. it’s a short phrase that has reframed a lot of how i think about celebrities tbh
Common John Green W
same guy who got cock monologues so he would know tbh
I think this is a good metaphor for people who don't understand: Imagine conventions. It's normal to ask cosplayers for pictures there and it's a part of life, UNTILL they take their costumes off. Then if you follow then home still asking for pictures, it's weird af.
This! People deserve space!
Even if you don’t follow them home, if after a few days, you recognize them at a grocery store (shopping, not in cosplay)- going up to them to ask for a picture is creepy regardless of how “respectfully” you ask and regardless of their response.
This is a FANTASTIC comparison
It's great to ask permission for pictures at a con.
It's still creepy and weird to stand about twenty feet away, very obviously pretending not to look, while holding a phone at an angle to get a picture without asking. This is one of the facets of cosplay is not consent.
The other part, obviously, is touching without permission, or even pestering to get permission to touch. The worst I've personally seen was a Lady Dimitrescu on stilts with a _physical safety concern_ because men kept approaching her to grab her legs.
But that’s not and has never been how celebrities work. We don’t see someone in a movie and be like oh well I really liked that character but you know the actor isn’t playing them RIGHT NOW CURRENTLY so I guess I can’t ask for an autograph. Like that makes zero sense lol
In 2006-09 when Brittany Spears ran from paparazzi, crying and breaking down, people said "she shouldn't have chosen this career if she can't handle the public attention."
Across the late 90's and early 00's when Jessica Simpson, Anna Nicole, Kelly Clarkson, America Ferrara, Jennifer Hudson were all relentlessly fatshamed, people said "they shouldn't have chosen this career if they can't handle the public attention."
In 2006 when Pete Wentz's nude photos leaked and legitimate reporters were sharing them everywhere, including to his family, friends, and loved ones, and he expressed embarrassment and a desire for privacy, people said "he shouldn't have chosen this career if he couldn't handle the public attention."
To this day, when celebrities ask people to not show up at their private homes, people say "they shouldn't have chosen this career if they can't handle the public attention." In 2016 a man set himself on fire and then took his life on the lawn of Miranda Cosgrove, making her stay with her parents for days on end because she could not feel comfortable and safe in her own home. Selena Gomez had a stalker break into her home after she repeatedly identified him as a threat, and she felt so unsafe she sold the home and moved.
"Celebrity" and what fans "deserve" are social constructs. They change with time. The only way they change is if they're called out... or someone dies. I prefer Chappell Roan's approach.
Nothing ever changes 😞
And then 2 decades down the line everyone and their mothers look back and say “Britney deserved better, she didn’t deserve that” and yet… here we go again doing the same damn thing to another pop princess.
the only thing fans deserve is when a celebrity actually does something bad like promote a scam that results in fans losing their money (eg. Matt Damon and the crypto company he advertised for, or hell even the celebrities that promoted Fyrefest) or doubling down on bigotry/mistreatment of others.
No one deserves the blatant dehumanisation that comes with becoming famous or popular
Well said. They owe us nothing but their work. And even that is their choice to continue making or not.
Chris Crocker was right all along.
Björk got sent a nailbomb by a crazed stalker who was angry about her dating a black man and got dragged for punching a paparazzo who had been tailing her for weeks and tried to approach her son. People are so shockingly entitled when it comes to celebrities, particularly artists and performers, that it seems that they forget that they are human beings capable of fear and pain. Good on Chappell for drawing a line in the sand about wanting to be treated like a normal human being.
And on the guy’s funeral she still sent flowers to the family, because according to her, they still lost a family member and she sends her condolences.
That’s fucking wild.
OH MY GOD I NEARLY FORGOT ABOUT THAT CASE that shit was so fucked up and ppl wanna be mad at CHAPEL????
exactly what i was thinking about, it's kind of sad we have some well known extreme cases in media (like björk's) and people still treats it as just some stan twitter drama...
That punch was epic too
Celebrities have been killed by crazed stalkers. That’s how we lost Christina Grimmie (Rest in peace) 🕊 Chappell has every right to protect herself, and anyone who’s angry at her over such a thing is super weird.
Selena Quintanilla too!
@@plasticjesus444one of the most tragic examples, yes 😢
bjork had a near-miss in the nineties, where a mentally ill fan tried to mail her a bomb. thankfully it was intercepted.
rebecca schaefer was killed by a stalker as well.
@@sh4rkb4itYes! Those are both extreme examples of why this behavior is creepy. I was thinking of her, but I forgot her name. It was Rebecca Schaefer- thank you!
YES. Normalizing this behavior has literally gotten people killed.
I think the thing that pisses me off so much is that one person who commented that this is just the way that things are and it won't change anytime soon - like you could be that change! You could start acting differently around celebs! You could pump the fucking breaks and respect these people's boundaries! Be the change you want to see in the world etc
The irony is that if people did that, she wouldn't be as famous as she is. I'd never heard of her until she started complaining about being famous.
It's a lot like the previously unknown comedians getting fame by complaining about being cancelled.
*harasses celebrity*
“that’s just how it goes!”
It’s strange to me that women always have to sugarcoat things to not offend people. The language Chappell used was straight forward and assertive, and people got offended. Good for her
@@MiasmicBlight assertiveness is generally more valued in men.
a huge part that bothers me is that probably a lot of people invading her space are young women who say these exact same things to other people (women don’t owe you shit, she chose to wear a skirt she didn’t choose to be harassed/etc, creepy behavior is unacceptable, all of the logical things she said shown in this entire video), but since it’s woman to woman and one of those women is famous the logic suddenly is lost.
i ain't a swiftie but taylor was right when she said something along the lines of "when a woman does something, it's immediately seen as an overreaction"
@@MiasmicBlightThey didn’t say “only” they said “generally more.” If you don’t notice the ways women generally face more pressure to be “likeable” you’re most likely not paying attention. Having worked in customer service with both men and women, the difference in how they’re treated is abhorrent.
@@MiasmicBlight it’s a statistically backed generalization, actually.
consent is something that should NEVER be taken from someone.
Usually yes, but there are some situation where you do have to take consent from someone. Like when you need to put a serial killer into prison, they probably won't consent.
@@lorenzreiher1407 What does that have to do with the price of tea in China?
@@lorenzreiher1407they don’t literally mean “never” with absolutely no exceptions, it’s more like “never (in a scenario like this)” as it pertains to the video, if that makes sense
@@megidolaon384 ? I never said anything about China, I just wanted to add some nuance to op's comment, which is conveniently placed above me if you want to reread it.
@@VultureSkins that seems more reasonable, but the upper case 'never' makes it seems very general.
The idea that Chappel Roan isn’t cut out for stardom is reminiscent of women being told they’re not cut out for male-dominated fields because they won’t tolerate being harassed and assaulted. Telling women to accept their lot in life and to not try to improve anything doesn’t sit right with me.
10000%!!!
I didn't even think of this but it's such a good point
TRUE! I’m a 23 NB (FtNB) and I work in marine biology + genetics research. I have been told this exact thing and have also been harassed & intimidated by significantly older colleagues, even professors. Sure it’s happened 2-3 times but that is 2-3 times TOO MANY!
!!!
1,000,000% spot on
Rebecca Schaeffer was shot and killed on her front porch by a fan. Chappell is right to set boundaries for her health and SAFETY
yes she is extremely famous. yes she tried to get famous. but she is 100% allowed to say no to literally anything
And ppl are 100% allowed to keep their money instead if forking it over to yet another entitled celebrity.
@@radish6740how is she entitled because she doesn’t want to be stalked and harassed?
@@radish6740 yeah sure but if you pay money to support her, you are not buying the right to invade her privacy. You’re also not paying for her “yes” to photos or interaction
@radish6740 entitled? Is she entitled to want privacy, for wanting peace of mind when she leaves the house? She is not entitled for wanting to feel safe, just like you and I aren't entitled for wanting the same thing. Nowhere in this did she say she didn't appreciate the support and love her fans give her, she explicitly said she doesn't condone or want the creeps of the world to all come flocking to her at every waking moment. She is still human. She is still like us. The only difference is that she made music that got popular. That doesn't make her any less valid or deserving of respect.
@@radish6740is there a reason you think buying an album gives you the right to someone else’s body, time and privacy? what the actual fuck is wrong with you
My favorite line was “this is not a group conversation” because someone’s personal boundaries are not up for debate. No one cares about your opinions on it. A human has a right to say no.
Period. End. Fin.
Yes!! I only knew of Chappell very vaguely through a friend before this video, but she has my full respect after reading those lines of "I'm not looking for anyone's response. This isn't a group conversation." Honestly, for entitled fans who feel the need to give their commentary on everything, that is one of the most powerful things she could've done, she literally said I don't care if you don't like it lol. She gave a great example of how to set boundaries.
💯💯💯💯💯
Yes!!
@SpaceBoyDigital then why are you watching a video about her? You don't have to be here
It's called consent peeps. Practice in all scenarios.
i cant believe chappell is getting so much hate just because she wants to be treated like a human
I feel like the only people who are actually mad at her are exactly the people she's calling out 😭 those are just the people the most chronically online so they make the most noise
Where??? Bc most people are defending her. There's a minority of crazy people.
@@Kittyka2345I saw 1 girl comment on all the videos. The SAME girl being mad. Saying she 'doesn't know who Chappell Roan is but Chappell Roan signed up for this'.
@@bees.857nah a lot of people on twitter are dragging her and saying she should be “grateful” bc they pay her bills. the entitlement makes me sick ppl are so disgusting
@@Kittyka2345 absolutely, i also think its because how dehumanized celebrities are, even if some of them are out of touch or extremely rich
When you get to see her at a concert, you get what you pay for. When you buy her merchandise, you wear it and you got what you paid for. When she entertains you on social media, you get what you pay for. That's it. That's how far the exchange should go.
If you expect her to accept your demanding access to her personhood and bodily autonomy, you're out of your mind. Her giving you her autograph, taking a picture with you is a bonus, not an entitlement. This is especially crazy considering how many celebrities have literally died from their fans.
Jesus is coming back. Please repent before it is far too late.
To be fair this should also be said about JK Rowling to the fans who think she owes them a certain worldview or she should retcon certain characters to be LGBTQ
@@TEFFTPATTERN Nope, not the same. Expecting a person to be a descent human being and respect people different from yourself is not the same as expecting love, admiration and a higher level of appreciation from them just because you're a fan. It's like with Nicki Minaj being called out for marrying a registered sex offender and bailing her now convicted paedophile brother out of jail. We expect common human decency from ANYONE... not just a celebrity. You're making an apple and oranges argument here.
@@nokoshadung5257 So easy to show a hypocrite in action I guess. You bought a book from her, she doesn’t owe you anything other than the book.
@@TEFFTPATTERN Again... I don't think she owes me anything as a fan of her books, but as a human being, she owes other human beings common decency. Am I speaking Spanglish? Anyone can call out another person for their wrong behaviour, she just happened to be famous and therefore, there are more voices calling out her behaviour. If I could dumb it down further, it's like saying nobody should expect Keanu Reeves, as a KKK member, to respect black people because his role in society ends with him being an actor.... that's stupid.
9:06 "I don't care that abuse and harrasment/stalking is normal for famous people."
My mom used to say it best: "Just because it's common doesn't make it normal. Bad things are socially accepted sometimes. You're bigger than that.
Your mum's an icon
Racism was socially accepted and so is misogyny in some places. Doesn’t make it right at all. She has ever right to say no and I’m sure all the celebs love her even more for saying something they never felt they could🎉
Wow, perfectly said. Love to see others understanding where these celebs are coming from
It does make it normal is just doesn't make it okay. That's literally what normalizing something is
Damn, your mom is really wise. Love this.
I'm so glad she bluntly said what fans of celebrities desperately needed to hear for decades. Sucks that some ppl felt offended+rejected. But to imply that those feelings should be more prioritized than someone's bodily autonomy+sense of safety is WILD
It’s sad we’re in a time where artists have to actively tell fans that they’re not their friends.
I kinda feel like most people these days are just inherently entitled, I think social media, same day delivery and other dopamine raisers has turned people into children in some ways honestly. It also doesn't help how we don't see celebrities like people, granted in some ways you can argue they aren't like us, but agreed everyone deserves bodily autonomy
@@devinkii1727it’s not new. Not even remotely. It’s just that we have a clearer lens to look at the fans now, and more ways for celebrities to talk directly to others through social media. It was arguably worse in the 60s and 80/90s with Elvis, the Beatles, Madonna, Michael Jackson etc etc. My mum experienced the complete bonkers situation of The Beatles in person at a concert when she was 11. It makes anything Chappell Roan is going through look normal, sadly. The only difference now is social media and people always have a camera on them and that has an amplifying effect on what has been a thing for a long time.
Obviously stalking is wrong, but caring about how others feel is a two-way street. If she's not worried about offending, then she can't say that people shouldn't be allowed to come up to her on the street.
That's not stalking. That's not wrong. It's a request, because coming up to her on the street makes her feel uncomfortable.
@@chan_martin I honestly think that's going too far the other way, and comes off as hateful. The phrase "I'm not your friend" or "we're not friends" has long been what you say to someone who don't like at all. And the people I've heard say it onlin tend to be hateful with it.
The line should be "we don't really know each other," in a kind tone. That's what it really is. People forget that they don't actually know the person on the other side of the screen.
people trying to fight for their right to stalk and harass a female celebrity is just ridiculous
a celebrity at all!! They. are all. people.
@@bethanychatman9531true, it does happen to women more though. unfortunate all around tbh
@@bethanychatman9531emphasizing that she’s a female celebrity does not mean they think it’s okay to stalk and harass male celebs. “All lives matter”-ass comment
@@KaptainVincent I wouldn't say it happens to women more often. It's that people are more aware of when abuses happen to women than they do to men. Almost every male celebrity in the pop, rock, alternative, and K-Pop genres has been subjected to some form of fandom stalking and harassment.
@@rileysjonger4192 im not trying to deny what youre saying, but women are *more likely* to receive this sort of treatment than men, and often times it *is* women that feel unsafe in their homes because of fans who exhibit the creepy behaviour roan is criticising. claiming that people are more aware of when women are harassed than men is missing the point, and to be honest, comes across as you downplaying an actual issue
not trying to fight you or anything, but i notice that this point is brought up a lot when people talk about female victims. "there are male victims too!" and "women are more at risk of being victimised" can be true at the same time
As an artist, she's already sharing A LOT with the public, way more than most of us ever will. Musicians do give a lot to listeners, and often set up events where meet and greets can happen. When they're off the clock, let them be. Would you want randoms asking for hugs at your job? Or demanding you do work while you're on your own time? Let them be people, and realize they don't know who you are, despite being able to know a lot about them.
john lennon was literally killed by a crazed "fan". he was just walking out of his apartment building with his wife when he was shot on the street. it is THAT easy, and i don't think anyone that hasn't reached that level of fame should tell her how to feel.
Same with Selena!
Same with Christina Grimmie… Chappell’s fans don’t know her, and she doesn’t know her fans. Boundaries are NORMAL.
@@emiliasteilsson7910 exactly 😭 There are legit crazy people out there who will stalk and have intentions to harm someone, literally regardless if they’re famous or not
@@emiliasteilsson7910Selena is a little different because she had been working with that “fan” who she confronted for stealing money. But it’s still truth anyone can kill you, and when so many people are obsessed with you you never know who will go through with a plan
christina grimmie too
it’s crazy how normalised the entitlement from fans is. if you actually think about it, a lot of fan culture really isn’t normal.
"If you actually think about it"? Its clear as day that a lot of fan behavior isn't normal. Its down right mentally ill.
@@hitfasthithard i said that because it’s normalised so a lot of people actually don’t think about it. hope this helps
They view the artists as a product to consume. I mean yeah theres always going to be a certain level of consumerism when it comes to art and music, but i feel like stan culture has really amplified artists being treated like products for you to consume and not individuals creating art that they want to share with the world
@@hitfasthithardsome of it is mental ill behaviour, but a lot isn’t yet it’s still not acceptable. A lot of it just spills into people believing they’re owed something by someone they’ve never met because they gave them money and attention.
that’s why they’re called stans. They take fandom culture too far.
there is a video from a few years ago where chappell basically says “when i get famous and yall start being weird, i’m going to be a c*nt.” i feel like the people who are angry are also mainly the people she called out.
I agree, those that are complaining and hating on her are the one's she's specifically speaking to. They're the same that cross boundaries and do creepy ish.
Did she really?? I love that for her wow🥰
@@turkeypedal I think you might be reading too deeply into it. When she said she’s going to be a c*nt she meant from the perspective of the people she’s setting boundaries with. Obviously she’s not going to be an awful person but THEY’RE going to view her as awful or a c*nt. Also I don’t think c*nt is a misogynistic slur, b*tch maybe but c*nt just means 4sshole tbh
@@turkeypedalother people are already ignoring how SHE feels though? i dont blame her for getting mean if she has to, i would probably be the same if people were doxxing my family, following me, touching me without permission, interrupting me while on a call to my therapist??! these are all things that have happened to chappell because of her fame, and being nice to the people being weird to her isnt going to solve the problem.
people treat chappell not as if shes a human, but as if shes only there to entertain them and bend to their will. shes not saying that shes just going to be awful to everyone point blank, but that if people are going to be weird and creepy to her, shes not going to be nice back.
@@turkeypedal read the comment again. Chappell says she'll be a c*nt if the fans start "being weird". If y'all don't want Chappell to be a c*nt then don't be weird! It's that simple.
I'm tired of weird behavior being rewarded with passive silence or long-suffering patience. It's time to fight back to the weirdoes (like Trump, JD Vance and all these delulu stans, cause they're all equally weird)!!!
The title had me SO nervous because you have a history of good takes and mature opinions. I’m happy that we feel the same. I actually paused to watch one of her performances and almost cried. This woman Loves making art and Loves performing her art. She deserves respect and kindness.
John Lennon was shot by a fan, Christina Grimmie was shot by a fan, Selena was killed by the president of her fanclub… It’s not unreasonable as a celebrity to be cautious of fans ESPECIALLY if they’re harassing and stalking you or your family.
@karinalumen9722oh damn my bad I didn’t know that! thanks for correcting me 🙏🏻
Yeah, this industry plant is on the same plane as a Beatle
@@grbenway how can you be this illiterate?
@karinalumen9722 From what I have heard from interviews from family of Selena, Yolanda was very possessive of Selena and had a complete shrine of Selena covering her home from head to toe.
@@grbenway the beatles suck lmao
god forbid a woman set boundaries when feeling unsafe
Like did we forget Christina grimy? People are weird af.
god forbid a woman restrict peoples access to her. god forbid. 💀
Super impressed Chappell spoke up and set boundaries. Fantastic role modelling and wishing the best for her.
The timeline of Taylor Swift going from "Fame is great!" to "I'm scared in my own home" proves that Roan is 100% correct.
That Taylor argument infuriated me, because the casual fan forgets that she has been forced to get used to HUNDREDS of fans sitting OUTSIDE OF HER HOUSE WAITING FOR HER TO COME OUT. THAT’S SO FUCKED UP.
Even Justin Bieber had this issue and when he called the fans out on it outside of his home, people thought that HE was being the asshole.
For the love of god can we please bring personal shame and embarrassment back??
YUP. and iirc she had a stalker that’s repeated his offense more than once, literally slept on her bed and all.
Taylor was a kid back in the days before social media became what it is today. It's sad to see that little girl who really didn't know what was coming and making the best of it, and then today seeing stalker photos of her at her home plastered all over social media.
it's also like...that's an 18 yo kid with a newfound fame that is talking. Ofc she'll have a bad take. All this proved is that the person posting it is immature.
Granted I don’t follow Taylor but didn’t her stalker(s) legit break into her home multiple times? And slept on her bed? And you have people shitting on Chappell for calling out creepy, parasocial behavior???
god forbid someone famous sets normal human boundaries
I guess people are more used to celebs that take advantage of stan and celebrity culture relentlessly. Ariana, Nicki, Eminem ironically, so on and so forth. Because she's seen as an "icon", or as she said herself "your favorite artist's favorite artist", people expect her to be the same. People expect her to be as shallow or self important, but the moment she places a very real and very important boundary, she's then shallow and arrogant in a way they don't like. It's kind of an opposite situation with Dogs Cat, with her calling her fans jobless just for having a fan name, and calling them stupid for liking her old "trash pop" music...as if her current music isn't the exact same stuff.
But there's also the ingrained problem with paparazzi and obsessive reporters mainly going uncriticized for the stalking and surveillance they essentially do, and that being a thing (at least in america) for decades now. People want to know what a celeb's house looks like, what their kids are doing, their relationship status, all things that start out inherently unnecessary but quickly become creepy.
they are legit but its the question if you can uphold that boundrie and have any control over others. Its good she is at least saying it and hopefully this changes over time
She can do whatever she wants, but she’s being rude about it and people are allowed to call her out for that. Without those fans, she’d be no one. It goes both ways, respect does.
Then how will we get a bountiful harvest? The ritual must be completed.
She is not a normal person. If she wants anonymity then she cant also be famous. Entitled rich white girls will cry if they cant have literally everything
the reality is stalking victims of any type are RARELY taken seriously and that is what we need to call the fuck out as we have this conversation.
This, being stalked or harassed is unbelievably stressful. It's really upsetting to see people think that someone has to just deal with.
EXACTLY!
Yes. I had a stalker for 7 years and knew the police wouldn't help me, they don't help really until you're already hurt or even dead.
It's terrible how it often takes someone being hurt or killed before the dangers of stalking are acknowledged with any gravity.
@@maddiegrace9787 Ugh, the way LE "deals with" stalking is so infuriating.
Women shouldn't have to relinquish their autonomy to go for their dreams. So many women i know shrink themselves or let things happen that shouldn't in order to keep or further their career. No one should put up with that because it perpetuates the issue and makes it worse. So, i hope women and everyone else follow Chappell's example within their careers and lives and call out the BS and harassment
15:13 also chappell roan has been so intentional with separating her art and persona from herself….its not like she suddenly switched up. she’s been saying these things for years, even before she got this massive platform
that’s why she goes by chappell when preforming!!
Same thing with Beyoncé. She said recently she's worked really hard to keep her career and on-stage persona separate from her personal life and her family life. I love that people like Beyoncé and Chappell Roan are realizing that their mental health and their personal space is more important than pleasing their fans. As a performer myself, I know people-pleasing is part of the job, but not when it invades your privacy or puts you in danger in any way. Nobody knows me, I'm a small independent artist in a tiny town no one's heard of, I have 4 monthly listeners on Spotify, but I've had stalkers, and it's very unsettling, to say the least!
i think chappell is really cool for attempting to FINALLY set a standard for boundaries for celebs and their fans. there is no “thats the way it is” when we can actively change it
That goes for many things. It's amazing how many people have made up their minds they will never question anything their culture does or try to change anything...especially when so much should change.
ABSOLUTELY. I've been a crazed fan, that was pretty much the theme of my early teens... And I never understood why fans would WANT to act like this. I may have married someone in my head, but I understood that it wasn't reality 😅 that was before social media but I had been one of the lucky ones - I discovered a fan chat room where the lead singer/object of my obsession actually popped in occasionally. I felt like I was privileged to get updates straight from him before everyone else, so the LAST thing I would do is say something that would make him creeped out or scared off.
If I could figure that out, anyone can. It's just the FANS who are "entitled" and need to realize they already get SO MUCH from celebrities. Maybe too much. But that's clearly an issue with society and it's not going to get better if those who are the victims of fan entitlement don't scream about it.
Didnt really vibe with her music at first, but she is just such a breath of freshair for the pop community. She has such a distinct vision that shes absolutely dominating. Most rising stars like her tend to keep quiet and let the fame ride in order to get people to like them, but she does NOT care. No doubt shes gonna change the industry, and I love her for it.
To quote good convention rules:
“Cosplay is not consent!!!”
That rule is easily used here;
“Fame is not consent!”
“Wealth is not consent!”
“Yes,” “sure,” or “okay” is consent.
And yes, consent can be revoked in *any* situation.
No is a full sentence.
What?
“Sure” is not consent. If it isn’t a yes then it is a no.
@@Youokhun “do you want to ride this rollercoaster?”
“Sure. Sounds fun.”
“Would you like a soda”
“Sure. What kind do you have?”
It *is* a form of consent.
“Sure” is a conformation word.
The definitions of “sure” are;
1. Confident, as of something awaited or expected.
*I am sure we will win the game.*
2. Impossible to doubt or dispute; certain.
*We have sure proof of his innocence.*
3. Bound to come about or happen; inevitable.
*a sure victory for the team.*
No version of this word is negative.
If someone says “sure” but they don’t mean it, that’s a form of passive aggression. That’s a toxic person.
“Do you want a soda?”
“Sure”
**gives soda**
“Excuse me?!? You should have *known* I didn’t want a soda!!!!”
@@SilverRagaire anything other than a yes is a no. That is the consensus. Many English speaking countries say “sure” but it doesn’t always mean a 100% yes. It can actually show uncertainty
"This generation is so soft" is such a truly stupid thing to say. Fame isnt the same anymore, with social media and the internet, its way worse to deal with.
And there were always famous people struggling with mental health issues brought on by fame/crazy fans. This generation is finally speaking up and breaking the cycle! We should be proud of that ❤
chappell roan is entirely right in this situation imo
Exactly and I see the majority of us are agreeing with her which makes me have some faith still in humanity
ofc she is
Doesn't change the fact she sucks dooky
@@ghoulishtoadbased on what, babe?
@@bug593 Running defense for the most mid singer ever
Just now remembering when Justin beiber had to say “hey can you please not show up at my house?” And one of the girls was like “can I still have a hug?”
he was way nicer than i would've been too... Like i remember some situations where he wasn't too nice about it and ppl got upset at him. As if he's not literally being stalked.
sounds like a nice girl to me
@@toxoplasmagondiyou should find the video
@eevee2411 we all liked this comment
Second hand embarrassment lmfao
Imagine her trying to handle this at 17! Her getting dropped and delaying fame was a true gift.
it’s really crazy how quickly people forgot about christina grimmie
all the "not cut out for it" and "this generation is so soft" crowd really needs to take a tally of all the musicians and perfomers of their respective generations who either took their own lives directly or OD'd trying to numb out how insanely unbalanced their lives had become. 27 club anyone?☹
Also how many performers who were killed by fans and the like
ppl blame "this generation" because they're blind and don't want to take accountability for the fact that they actively perpetuate this type of behavior smh
Or literally celebs who were murdered from their generations. Like so many celebs have been murdered
@sl33pi6unni exactly so many killed or at risk hell even youtubers abd streamers face this danger
The same people who say 'this generation is soft' are the same people who think drag shows/concerts shouldn't have kids in the audience. I wonder why they flip-flop their moral outrage like trying on a new outfit
"It's part of the job!" is such an insane way to defend other people's inappropriate behavior. I work in an extremely male dominated industry where sexism/misogyny is very much a common experience that sort of "comes with the job" but that doesn't mean it's okay?? Or that I should just be cool with it cause I like this kind of work
They’re basically outting themselves that they think people with whatever arbitrary amount of fame they decided was the line today don’t deserve basic human rights or respect because they say so. Imagine if we held this thought for every job. “Oh you got your hand cut off at the factory? Well maybe have you thought that that *comes* with being a factory worker, hm?” The absolute cognitive dissonance of some mfers….
Did everyone just forget about the MeToo movement and how the entire point was that sexism, SA, and harassment shouldn't be "part of the job?"
Did we all forget Christina grimmy? Having random strangers come up to you while you are just trying to live your life is annoying and frightening. You don’t know peoples intentions or boundaries
Men either thought they were lying or crying about 'not all men' and 'what about men' @@yeeyeeyeeye
Thats like if a factory worker complained about getting cancer from the things they work with and their boss just replies with that its “its just apart of the job”
this behavior is why mitski disappeared from all social media, do stans want to push Chappell in the same direction or something????
I didn’t even know that’s why Mitski did that!
During one of her concerts around 2016 someone yelled i love you at her and she went "thats sweet but you dont actually know me so dont say that" (or something like that) and tbh good for her
Same reason why Ethel cain deleted her tumblr. Fans felt entitled to her attention and wouldn't stop crossing boundaries. If people want their favorite celebrities to stick around and make more content, they shouldn't be purposely doing things to cross their boundaries. It's sad that people who want to make performance art are put through this.
omori pfp
She’s also open about being Bipolar 2 FFS. She’s protecting her mental health and people get angry at her?!?
People like “hmmmm but she still wants money right???”
Yeah. If you want to listen to her music you pay to LISTEN TO HER MUSIC! Access to her body is not for sale. Her personhood is not for sale. Her autonomy is not for sale.
Her MUSIC is for sale. Her PERFORMANCES are for sale. That’s it.
Try going to wal-mart and telling the cashier that because you bought cheetos you also get the register.
THE REGISTER IS NOT FOR SALE.
Edit: people pretending this is literally only about ASKING to take pictures is are so predictable. Did y’all not watch the entire video??
YES! this is the best way i've seen it put. she's 👏not 👏for👏sale! 👏
People backing her up REALLY need to work on their arguments if they are going to join the convo. Your comparisons are absolutely atrocious.
BARS!!!
Period!
@@FullMetalBi think it works quite well
Some jobs are riskier than others. The solution isn’t to just let people keep getting burned or get a new job, it’s to reduce those risks.
Chappell is completely right. American celebrity culture is incredibly creepy and obsessive. It's a job. They're just normal people who happen to be entertainers. We need to stop putting these people on extreme pedestals.
it’s not only american celebrity culture. i think it’s a worldwide phenomenon bc look at how some stans dictate a kpop idol’s life. something needs to be done bc this is getting too crazy
Bruh it's not just American celeb culture. Those kpop fans are fucking crazy.
@@dramaticvirghoe there are many cultures around the world where things like paparazzi, obsessive stalking, of celebrities and well-known individuals is actually a faux pas, and not considered socially acceptable.
Why did i keep thinking it was pronounced shapel roan 😭
@@VSytstolemyhandleforacorpi agree with you on that. there needs to be a cultural shift bc i’d hate to see this situation turn foul. artists like chappell roan need to be protected. doxxing and stalking is never okay
Chappell doesn't owe people hugs or her personal time. She's a performer so you get to watch her content, do official meet and greets, and come to see her shows. She doesn't owe anyone more than that. She's allowed to set her own boundaries. Imagine if you worked for Amazon and after hours people would come to your house, look through your windows, and ring the doorbell telling you that you needed to process their refund right now AND hug them. WTF? It's weird to expect that of anyone.
Amen. She's a person and deserves that respect and privacy.
This is the line that is used on everyone asking to be respected. "You're a celebrity, get used to it", "you're a mom, get used to it", "you're a woman, get used to it", etc.
100%! People love saying those things to justify social norms and behavior that "benefit the masses" aka those with the most power.
It's not even a logical argument at all,makes zero sense
People calling her entitled because she says random people aren't entitled to her time and body......the call is coming from inside the house.
So true just let this woman do what she loves
oof, well said, cut right to the core
At this point i'm convinced 70% Of the population have to be mentally ill In order to think this is acceptable in anyway.
Have people forgotten that Christina Grimmie, Gianni Versace, John Lennon, Dimebag Darrell, and Selena, to name a few were killed by “fans”?
Maybe they need to be reminded that Björk had an acid bomb sent to her by a “fan”, Jackson Wang got involved in a car accident after being closely followed by a “fan”, a deranged “fan” broke into Seo Taiji’s home and sat in his car.
In November 2009 2PM’s Taecyeon had a letter sent to him written by a “fan” in menstrual blood, a month later Lee Joon from MBLAQ received a letter from a “fan” written to _him_ in blood, and then a month after that, a “fan” of Wonder Girls cut her wrist, and took photos of her slashed wrist and the message “come back Wonder Girls”.
Or perhaps people need to be reminded that a “fan” once waited for actor Kristin Cavallari to leave the gym, followed her, and then told her that she had a flat tire, all before the flat tire alarm in her car went off. He had slashed it himself.
A “fan” of Miranda Cosgrove shot a woman who looked like her, and then shot himself and set himself on fire _in her front garden_
One of Jodie Foster’s “fans” became so obsessed with her that he stalked her when she was studying at Yale, and then tried to assassinate Ronald Reagan.
Trixie Mattel and Katya Zamo have repeatedly said that the trauma dumping done upon them by fans is unfair and stressful.
Being a fan doesn’t entitle you to the time or the life of another person. Sure the examples listed above are extremes but to the person stalking or harassing a celebrity, they think what they’re doing is normal, and that’s why Chappell is completely 100% in the right to say that she wants to limit interactions with fans.
All of this. And to add one of the "classic" celebrities, Marilyn Monroe continues to be disrespected even after her death. She was entombed in a mausoleum and not only did a stalker/superfan manage to get himself entombed next to her because of his obsession, but the random-ass dude entombed above her PAID to be set face-down so he could be "on top" of her. Society needs an overhaul at this point.
So glad I’m not the only one who remembers all this wild “fan” (STALKER) behavior. And the sad thing is you didn’t even touch on all of them. It’s insane the entitlement some people have. And it honestly shows the lack of mental health awareness worldwide.
@@ruralmetalheadOh my God! I knew about a lot of sick fan incidents but not that one. Even in death, they’re perverted and invasive.
Technically Princess Di was killed by a crazed 'fan' too-- paparazzi but still was acting like a rabid fan like Taylor Swift was talking about those crazies in Nashville on Highway 65 driving with one hand and trying to take a video for clout with the other hand--I'm surprised Swift didn't end up like Princess Diana with the amount of drunk drivers here in Nashville
People are genuinely weird. Thank you for detailing each stalking situation.
I used to do music as a teenager. Like competitions on a local, state, national, and international level, doing paid gigs, etc. I knew a lot of other people my age who did the same and some went on to get record deals. I chose to stop my dreams of music entirely at 18 because I started being stalked by a man who was VERY upset i wasn't dating him. Full on showing up at my shows, my school, and my home. I was by no means famous, barely a known person in the circles i performed in, but because i put myself out in the world a person felt entitled to my time, energy, body, and life. I had to move, first across town and later out of state. I stopped doing music so it wouldn't be advertised where i was. I stripped every video of myself off the internet i could. And he DID NOT GIVE UP. After a year of being genuinely scared he would follow through on his threats to break into my home, violate me, kill me, and destroy my body, i dropped out of college and moved 3 states away. I cannot imagine how awful it would be on a greater level
Thank you for sharing this?!
People forget that ANYONE can be stalked, and celebrities especially can have a harder time keeping them away due to how schedules are visible to the public.
Hence why this behavior is COMMON but should NOT be normalized.
I'm sorry you went through that, however, and I hope you're okay 🫂
Did we all forget how billie was treated in her documentary? Chappell Roan is 100% in the right. Leave celebs alone. They don't know you, you don't know them.
"Not cut out to be a pop girlie" is a wild thing to say about some we all agree has some of the best vocals and performances in the game right now.
@@lilafliesrockets they'd prefer a photo prop over actual talent.
And SONGWRITING! ❤
She's seriously the best artist of our time
Exactly like if your only standard is "wants limitless attention and has no boundaries" who's music are you listening to? Jeffree Star?
It’s also a pathetic, infantilising, dismissive and ignorant comment which reveals the belligerent stupidity and misogyny of the person who said it.
Another aspect to this-Chappell is open about being a lesbian, but that doesn’t mean all her superfans are queer. Recently I saw a short video of a fan who coincidentally was on the same plane as her, and that fan mentioned how there were several men at the gate who seemed to be there bc they were following her, luckily she had security with her so she was protected. Still, as a lesbian myself the mere thought of having random men know of my sexuality, know my name *and deliberately follow me* would honestly make me fear for my life/physical wellbeing. Like, especially as a famous queer person I imagine there’s also the aspect of “is this an overexcited fan with poor boundaries or am I about to get hate-crimed??”
Edit to clarify (bc I didn’t anticipate that my quick comment would get much attention): my comment was about the added aspect of lesbiphobia that applies here. Yes, obsessive stalker fans can be of any gender/sexuality. However, I singled out cishet men here bc Chappell appears to have male cishet stalkers and she‘s openly living as a lesbian.
Lesbiphobia can vary between openly aggressive & volatile vs. more covert, a cishet man obsessively stalking an open and proud lesbian will most likely be of the openly aggressive kind. The one where a man is deeply offended that a woman he’s attracted to refuses to be sexually available to any man, *even him*. It’s a mix of a predatory challenge, a sense of entitlement, and contempt for the blanket rejection (that stings double when they believe that your sexual orientation is just a choice you “frivolously” made), often with the added feature of discriminatory fetishisation. If you’re not a queer woman you might not comprehend where in this explanation the difference to “regular” sexual harassment is, but as a lesbian who only started living openly “later in life” and was previously perceived and treated like a straight woman, I promise you there is a difference. I have never felt unsafer around men than I do now, including the times where I was still deeply closeted and found myself in unsafe situations with a straight man.
You are so right
It makes me think that they want to "fix" her sexuality by assaulting her. 🤮
Dude me being a nobody and a (masc presenting) lesbian already scares the heck out of me when I'm out there alone, I fear for my life. I can't even imagine being in her shoes, having so many people knowing who you are being THAT famous. People these days just make shit up to hurt each other for no reason, I'd be paranoid at all times. lol
Fr this is something not a lot of people seem to acknowledge
The guys could be gay also. But yes. And as a straight woman, same. And there are very dangerous women out there, too, don’t assume they are ALL men because the majority are. Stay safe sister. ♥️✌️🗳️🟦
ANY PERSON setting boundaries and demanding they be respected is so valid. It's THEIR boundaries, it's their autonomy, it's their body and their space. Good for her, she's holding people accountable and shining a light on toxic ass behavior. Celebrities are people. Period.
Chappell Roan isn't entitled. She said "fame isn't worth this" and that she'd drop the fame to stop this fear and discomfort. "I'll stop doing any of this if I need to get security." That's not entitlement.
Im sorry, she soent 10 years trynna be famous and then said that. Dont forget, she totally knew what the industry eas like before she entered. Im not saying she has to deal with it but then she shouldnt have tried so hard
@@SpaceBoyDigitalshut up, one works hard to get the work done, not to get stalked. Stop being a weird entitled stain of a human. Fame shouldn’t be the price of being great at your job, only the people unable to achieve anything worthy for themselves are the ones that believe so.
Stop being a creep.
ok then she should do that
@@SpaceBoyDigital You didn't watch the video did you
The only difference between her and others is that she said what others have always thought but could not say out loud.
the decent response to a "no" when u ask a celebrity for a picture is to just go "ok! im a huge fan, have a wonderful day" or smth along those lines, its not that hard
edit: the fuck is going on in these replies get out of my house (/j)
Just a polite smile and go!
I dont think most people who are mad at her disagree with this sentiment. I think they agree that Chappelle has the right to decline, the thing they take issue with her lumping in the act of asking a celebrity for a picture with "creepy stalker behavior". Like the issue they are having is specifically framing simply asking for a picture as inherently creepy and immoral, regardless of how respectful the fan is if the celeb declines
@@botanicalitus4194 Like Chappell says herself, "if you have a problem with me asking you to not stalk me, stalk my family, touch me, or get pissed when I say 'no' to a hug/picture that THAT IS A YOU PROBLEM" She shouldn't have to feel bad that somebody thinks that Chappell is talking about them when she says "creepy"-- just stop being creepy #simple
@@botanicalitus4194 Because it is creepy to have people you don't know approach you and demand pictures
@@botanicalitus4194she wasn't talking about respectful sane fans. She's talking about the creepy weirdos who can't take no for an answer, or get offended that she declined.
If normal fans are getting upset over that, then it tells me they must be very young and don't understand what she said in her video explaining it, cause it's pretty clear what type of person she was describing: the stalker creepy weirdo kind.
I’ve agreed with Chappell’s comments since Brittany in the 2000s. Idol worship is creepy and weird.
Yeah what’s sad is it’s been going on well before the sick harassment Britney went through. Like Bjork’s stalkers attempt to harm her with an acid bomb that actually reached her residence! Or even John Lennon was killed by a stalker fan just leaving his apt. So scary and sad
The people who say this shit about Chapell will scream “FreeBritney” while claiming they didn’t play into her downfall in the 2000s. Hindsight is 20/20 and somehow nobody sees the fault in themselves…interesting.
Do people genuinely think that once someone is well known they are no longer human? Old stars (especially in the 60s-80s) would constantly od and off themselves from the stress that she's asking people to stop putting on her.
I think this boundary is such a normal ask and should be respected.
Absolutely. The whole “they signed up for this” mentality is so entitled and shameless. Cannot believe people are arguing the morality of policing other people’s boundaries.
I think saying “ do not ask me for a hug “ is better than saying “ it is weird to ask me for a hug “ . Like people in real life that ive spoken to for not too long have asked me for hugs before and I don’t automatically think they’re creeps for that . I think it’s irresponsible for D’Angelo to make such a bold statement like that . People are different just bc he has obviously has issues with being touched doesn’t mean everyone does
@@lalaland7961 Most of us are smart enough to know what he means. He's not responsible for anyone's understanding of how basic boundaries work. We're listening to him because he's a fun creator to listen to, not because he's our appointed moral guide.
@lalaland7961 are you really tone policing a stalking victim right now? Are you listening to yourself?
@@f1mbultyr what the heck I’m not tone policing . I didn’t say she’s not a victim bc I don’t agree with one thing she said … learn what words mean before use please !
Celebrities don't owe their fans anything. Good on her for setting a boundary and not feeling the need to sugarcoat it to try and not upset people.
Just keep forking over the money, though, right? 🙄
@@radish6740 If you stop supporting art you enjoy because you think the artist owes you their time then you have issues.
@@brett8259no, you have issues if you don’t hold the people who you give money as a hobby to some degree of moral responsibility. You’re out of your mind if you can willingly SUPPORT and FUND a person who’s doing completely reprehensible stuff behind their art. That’s literally the mindset that gets these athletes and frat boys out of criminals charges. Because they’re talented and making people money. Ridiculous.
Yes they do? You people are so stupid
@@PeripheralVisionary. " It is important that we extend the same boundary and societal expectations to Roan that applies to Bezos." People also shouldn't be stalking Jeff Bezos and then getting pissed at him for saying no to a picture/hug.
Anthony Mackie is well known for not taking random photos out and about. If he is not being paid to be there and do it, he doesnt. Someone tried to call him out once and was dragged bc it's so common knowledge.
Celebrities deserve to feel safe, and we need to evolve as fans...period.
Good for him!
@@zoeisonline its controversial bc its not seen as normal for the fan celeb parasocial relationship most celebs agree to i give you art you give support i show my appreciation for you as a fan by taking a pic with you or talking with you or hug etc .
Same thing with Cillian Murphy, and MC Ride from Death Grips.
It's not celebrities in general, because it seems like it's specifically young celebrities, especially women.
@@adelmosallamiyeah, all celebrities are treated like crap by the public, but it’s especially prominent for female celebrities
Note: man ok, woman not ok. Sigh
I respect tf out of Chappell for trying to change how normalized this behavior is towards celebrities.
Ah yes, Chappell Roan is EXTREMELY ENTITLED for... *checks notes*... wanting her basic need for privacy, security, and basic human autonomy to be respected. How DARE she set boundaries and want to be treated with basic respect as a human being! This is an OUTRAGE!
As a woman who is *not famous* at all, and maybe the only agnostic on chappell roan (based on how famous she is), I can validate what she is saying 100%. I am a victim of stalking, and that is only one person interacting with me like this. I cannot imagine if my stalker were multiplied into hundreds without me knowing about them. Terrifying.
One of the most famous people George Harrison said "They [fans] gave their money, and they gave their screams. But the Beatles kind of gave their nervous systems. They used us as an excuse to go mad, the world did, and then blamed it on us." Fame sounds exhausting and honestly I think the majority of celebrities agree with Chappell Roan. Fans are not entitled to a celebrity's time or gratitude.
And people seem to have forgotten that George was stabbed 40 times by a fan in his own home. The only reason he lived is because his wife beat the guy with a lamp. His cancer was in remission at the time, but 18 months after the attempted murder, George was dead.
as famous as the beatles are, stalkers and obsessive fans are the main reason that two of the beatles are dead
Even when I was a child, I always felt bad for famous celebrities especially in the 2000s paparazzis? Sheesh. Hard to understand how a child had more empathy towards these people than the grown adults now
People saying she “asked for this” is especially unhinged, because I’d be willing to bet money she didn’t dream of her and her family being STALKED? Also she wanted to make music… not to be watched by millions of people…
The fact that the Industry requires the latter to justify giving you the ability to do the former isn’t her fault??????????🤨
Being stalked? No. Harrassed? Obviously not Being recognized and people wanting to talk to her? That's what fame is. Yeah, maybe she doesn't want to talk, and she has a right to say that, but people are going to come up to her.
And, FYI, I don't know this woman. I'm not going to go up to her because I wouldn't even recognize her. I'm not saying this out of my entitlement. Just what I think is reasonable.
Fame means people recognize you and want to interact with you.
@@turkeypedalshe’s not saying there’s anything wrong with recognizing her or interacting with her. she’s saying ppl need to respect her physical boundaries and remember she is a human being and deserves to be treated as such.
the fact that her fans doxxed pretty much her entire family is so horrifying. i hope everybody stays safe.
also i feel like it must be so difficult for her to adapt to this sudden fame. not until long ago she struggled to pay her rent and now she is one of the most popular singers in the world? thats crazy. it must be so hard to go about her daily life, especially as nobody in her family or close friends is a celebrity. like she is not hanging out in gated communities or at beach resorts but at regular places where she is constantly exposed to her fans.
@@turkeypedal you’re still describing entitlement
@@turkeypedalno one is even entitled to speak to her in public. I would never approach any celebrity unless it was at one of their shows and it was allowed. Why? Because I know these people just want to live too. They’re famous, but that does not make it so that I’m entitled to them as a person whenever I see them in public. They are fully allowed to have boundaries and should also be allowed to expect those boundaries to be respected because they are PEOPLE!!!
I saw a comment on her recent Instagram story thanking people saying she is now "dragging it out" as if telling people to not stalk you and your non famous family has an expiration date. Chappell Roan is 100% in the right and I am glad she has put up her boundaries stan behaviour can be terrifying.
Chappell Roan is in the right, it is not even a debate or a discussion, some fans can be weird and creepy and should be called out on their behaviour
Certain conversations require being blunt, and this is one of them.
I had a situation where I was walking down the streets last month and saw a celebrity. They were really kind and said yes to a picture, but by the time I had taken the picture, a crowd had formed behind them and my family and I agreed that they looked a little uncomfortable. So, now I'm thinking a lot about this chappell statement. I felt so sorry for that celebrity I took a picture with on the street, but those people forming a line behind them wanted to take a picture. Just like I had. My thought process before I asked for the picture was "well, I'm never going to see them again, might as well ask for a picture", as if they were a rarely-seen tourist attraction. That's just such a weird way of thinking about a person
such a good point of view! thank you for sharing
Yes, I always feel bad about it after. I feel bad for even wanting to talk to them or interact with them. As if I have the right
@@amyleesuits"always feel bad" how many times have you done this then...? and why do you continue to do it..?
@@2b00bsjohnson I worked in late night for 7 years. I never asked for a photo or went up to them unless I got explicit permission from talent (which I only asked for once for my favorite actor) and every other interaction was like just kind of in passing. for example once in a while I worked in the green room and so it would just be a constant battle in my head of whether to make conversation or just leave them alone. I'm not ashamed of my actions (I always made the right choice and suppress whatever it is I actually want to do) but I am ashamed of the desire itself, plus it makes me sad to know that my faves would lose respect for me if my love and appreciation for them ever came to light. It sends me into a depression spiral every time I think about it.
@@2b00bsjohnson actually I did get too drunk at the wrap party and talk to someone that I probably should have not talked to, had a panic attack right after and ubered home and cried for like 8 hours straight. but I woke up to discover that after I went home all of my coworkers got photos with them so I was like okay, I guess going up and saying hi was actually not that bad in comparison? but yeah that was probably the most guilty I've ever felt in my life. but I was so drunk
The clip of 18-year-old Taylor Swift is extra misplaced because of how publicly she’s been speaking about the fear and discomfort she experiences at her level of fame. There’ve been so many news articles about freaks breaking into her homes and even sleeping in her bed. She said in 2019 that she keeps military-grade clotting bandages with her in case she or loved ones get shot or stabbed. Artists like Christina Grimmie, Selena, and John Lennon were killed because deranged weirdos held unfounded delusions about the celeb’s fame and person. The reactions to chappell’s statements are so bonkers to me.
Great comment but you’re wrong about Selena. Yolanda wasn’t just a fan, she was employed by her, got caught stealing money, and killed her out of anger for confrontation or responsibility.
Also Taylor was a kid man 18 is still a kid why was this person so ok with Taylor being exploited as a teenager?? 😭
taylor swift can't even go to and from places within the stadium while she's touring!! she literally is driven around in a box disguised as cleaning supplies.
@@Petrichorus- I feel like it’s even worse that she got personally close to her and then killed her ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . if anything, that emphasises the point chappell’s point about how scary and dangerous it is for people to feel entitled to celebrities’ lives (literally and figuratively).
@@johanabi yes it proves Chappels point that fans are dangerous, but you lumping in Selena’s killer with others as having “unfounded delusions” about Selena is still _huge_ misinformation. She wasn’t a crazy Selena worshipper, she was fan who used her position to become a thief and then killed Selena due to greed, not some obsession over her.
I understand that you weren’t aware of this which is why I commented a correction, because Chappell is correct to not trust strangers but I don’t want people to twist Selena’s tragedy to make it something it’s not. The tragedy is that she trusted someone who handled her business, not that someone was bananas over her.
I took the way Chappell said "random person" as just someone you have no relationship with. She's not your family, your friend, your coworker, your acquaintance, anything. She is a random person to her fans, just as we are random people to her.
exactly !! i used to be in stan twitter years ago, they just have selective reading comprehension
Chappell is so real for saying all that, and anyone who thinks otherwise needs to have a real good think about why
I don’t think celebs owe us a single thing when they’re not working. If they’re out and about in their day to day life they should be left alone. I live in NYC and have seen dozens of celebs in the last 11 years and for everyone who lives here there’s an unspoken rule that if you see a celeb in a bodega you can give them a smile and a nod, maybe a “hey love your work” and that’s as far as it goes. Sometimes the celebs will say “do you want a picture?” And if they offer them cool! But oftentimes they’re just trying to buy a bagel and appreciate being left alone.
I’ve seen Mark Ruffalo, Tim Gunn, Kate Mulgrew, Samira Wiley, Lucy Liu, Orlando Bloom, Billy Porter and a few others over the years. You just let them be because they were literally all just trying to get errands done. Kate Mulgrew was at a butcher shop in my neighborhood. Lucy Liu was eating dinner at a restaurant I was a hostess for, and told me she liked my leggings so I gave her a big “thank you, I love your movies!” And let her eat her dinner in peace.
I’m fully on Chappell’s side.
Omg, I love Lucy Liu! Lucky!
As much hate as NY is, that's really cool that people collectively agree to respect others
She is so absolutely beautiful in person, the camera doesn’t do her justice somehow.
That's the way to treat celebs. Thanks for sharing your stories, you're a good human.
Chappel Roan is a sweetheart. But the stalking is not okay
I know what you mean but this comment sounds like Chappell is the stalker lol
@@emily3…AND the stalking is not okay. 😂
@@JackiePearl thank you😂 lmao
I'm not sure that's how you're supposed to use the word "but"
@@thesovgcshe is not obligated to take pictures with fans
“She has every right to say no, BUT-“
“Yes people encroach upon your space and that’s bad, BUT-“
“Set the boundaries you need to set, BUT-“
do these people not hear themselves?? she’s asking to be treated respectfully and people are tying themselves in knots to justify why she’s not allowed that basic human dignity. it’s very plain and simple victim blaming.
Chappell (and D’Angelo 💞) are 1000% correct in their assessments. this common behavior of stan communities is deranged and should be treated as such.
The bjork stalker incident from 1996 haunted me and really started my shift in how I see celebrities and their fans/the press. That and watching the many downspirals of young women who were celebrities in full public view. It's nothing less than cruel when you add everything up. One person asking for a photo is a novelty. The multitudes of entitled fans after a certain point becomes unfathomable
I think comparing invasive superfans to the 'where my hug at' dudes is the best take on this ive heard so far in all the discourse. Imagine the entire world coming at you like a where my hug at dude. Terrifying
I don't. They're very different. Not in the one is worse than the other, but that both can be okay, and both can be bad, for different reasons.
The "where's my hug" guy is fine if they know you. The superfan is fine if they stay within certain boundaries.
@@turkeypedalthe issue with "where my hug at" guy is the entitlement. if you have an established boundary with someone where you hug them it is obviously fine. but pressuring someone to hug you by asking "where's my hug" is not okay and can make people very uncomfortable. i think you have a misunderstanding of what a "where my hug at" guy is lol
@@mppiyeah that was actually the only part of the video i disagreed with lol. i think fans that ask for hugs without considering "no" an acceptable response are like "where my hug at" dudes, but outside of that entitled approach its good practice to me. i guess i see it as checking if it would be an invasion of personal space rather than asking to invade... tho since chappell roan has established she does not like it, it would def be weird to ask at all now lmao
@@nicolejustkidding8662but why are you asking to hug and be in physical contact with someone you don’t know? like it’s still entitled, maybe not to the same degree as the “where my hug at guy”, to think just because you indulge in someone’s art that means asking for physical contact with them as a stranger is okay.
@@azari_osaka well humans are empathetic by nature, so while its not my cup of tea lol, there's a few scenarios i can think of where ppl who dont know each other connect on something and hug. like i've seen someone having a bad day and a stranger offers a hug. or a a person receiving an act of kindness from a stranger and they ask to hug them in thanks. or even something silly like two people wearing the same shirt and they ask to hug excitedly. i think it's weird for sure to think you deserve a hug in those moments. but to want one and to ask for one, to me, is saying "hugging would be a good experience for me right now, would it be one for you too?"
so i guess i see the question in itself establishing that you dont know the person, or even just their feelings on being hugged. if that makes sense 😅 however it is absolutely creepy to walk up to an artist and ask for a hug without talking to them first, like what happened to hello? how are you? my name is? lmao
Let's think about WHY it was normalized to scream at, touch, run after, photograph etc celebrities. Because they were set as PRODUCTS. Because a label or an agency or a studio behind them would profit from this kind of behavior. By taking her carreer on her own hands Chappell, as well as Taylor, Kesha and others are breaking this awful pattern AS THEY SHOULD.
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Current Taylor would definitely empathize with Chappell. Thirtyfour-year-old Taylor Swift doesn't feel the same as 18-year-old Taylor Swift about fame. She released this diary entry from 2013: (WARNING, this is long)
"This week, I spent most of my time watching TV, some of it swimming in the pool, a significant amount of time feeling incomplete, then wondering why because I have the life I’ve always wanted. Then hating myself for feeling in any way ungrateful for this mostly perfect life.
But this mostly perfect life can feel a lot like being a tiger in a wonderful enclosure. It’s pretty in there, but you can’t get out.
It’s peculiar to me that after all these years, I still get so anxious when I see a group of people staring, amassed outside my house, pointing, camera phones up … They could never imagine how much that feels like being hunted. And no matter how big my house is or how many albums I sell, I’m still going to be the rabbit. Because the hunters will always outnumber me. The spectators will stand by, shaking their heads, going “That poor girl.”
But the point is, they’re still watching. Everyone loves to watch a good hunt.
I worry for my generation and the ones after that because they will never truly experience a moment without attempting to capture it and own it. I am of the generation where you see a beautiful flower growing up through the cracks in the sidewalk, and you pick it. You take it with you to show everyone you know. Whereas I think our ancestors might come upon a beautiful flower and stop and think ‘Wow. That is really beautiful.“
Nevermind that picking a flower kills it, the same way taking a picture of a moment can ruin it altogether. They needed to possess things. They need photographic proof that they were there. They need to then post that photo online so their friends can see it. So that they can spend all day checking the comments underneath. That level of possession worries me."
She's also written about not feeling cut out for the pop girlie life in her song The Lakes: "I'm not cut out for all these cynical clones, these hunters with cell phones."
Oh man that’s so sad. Especially knowing how that was light compared to her life now.
I think people really need to stop and think about what it must be like to be hunted like these super famous celebs are. I am 100% on Chappell Roan’s side and I’m so glad she came out and said it. I bet the Taylor of today cringes that she ever did that interview.
that's so sad :(
And her song I Know Places from 1989. The lyrics are literally “they are the hunters we are the foxes…..I know places we won’t be found and they’ll be chasing their tails trying to track us down”
My goodness I’m so glad to see such level headed people cause x formerly known as twitter is just a mess of parasocials and freaks on a hate train for this poor woman. Thank you so much dangelo I hope you have a blessed day ❤
20:00 I can’t believe people would try to use this as a gotcha moment so depressing my god
I want Mitski to chime in on this discourse so bad, because I have fully avoided her shows because her fans are such weirdos around her
this kind of thing is exactly what drove mitski away from the internet
It's so sad how she looks uncomfortable around her own fans. I've never seen an artist and a fanbase have such opposite vibes. She asked them to stop calling her mother because it made her uncomfortable and if you open her comment section it's all they say. They bark at her during very emotional moments of her show like it's funny. They turn everything she says or do into a meme like a humiliation ritual. Just weird.
God you’re so right 😭
DeAngelo on mad streak. Definitely didn't fall off.
Constant bangers
he's doing a crazy run
Chappell has every right to set her boundaries with fans and she shouldn’t need to really sugarcoat it. It really shouldn’t be difficult for people to understand when she made her opinions clear.
Agree with the first part, but not the second. She should care about the feelings of her fans if she's asking them to care about her feelings. And one way that happens is that you "sugarcoat it."
@@turkeypedal...the entitlement is wild. anyone engaging in invasive behaviour absolutely does not need or deserve to have boundaries "sugarcoated". use common sense and be respectful or get rightfully told off
@@turkeypedal "You should be gentle and sensitive, or people are allowed to disregard your request for safe boundaries"
You're literally a talking red flag.
@@turkeypedalYou’re embarrassing.
@@turkeypedal if they're stalking and harassing her, they've already demonstrated that they don't care about her feelings. Therefore, it's not illogical to assume she should have no reason to give a damn about theirs. If someone's hurt by what she said then it says more about them than her.
I think what Chappell is doing is extremely necessary. As a society we place celebrities on such a pedestal. Just because someone is known for their art, doesn’t mean that they owe you shit. I think people should be allowed to be known for their job and nothing else and literally any person should be allowed to put boundaries in place, ESPECIALLY when it comes to safety. The fact that this is even an argument is so weird to me.. I wish it was normal to see a celebrity out & about doing normal shit like being at the supermarket and being like “oh that was Chappell roan, dope I love her music” and then move the fuck on with your day. The confidence people have to harass especially online is just such a gross and bizarre thing we have deemed as “normal” just because you think you know someone because of their job. If she dips off the music scene these fans only have themselves to blame
Selena was murdered by a stalker fan (her literal president of her fan club) so I can understand why chappel isn’t happy.
Yes!! Selena died only ~30 years ago and her murderer will soon be eligible for parole. This celebrity stalking shit is not a joke.
that is a very strange twisting of the narrative. Yolanda Saldívar wasn't some fan, she was literally Selena's employee - she was the manager of her boutiques and registered agent in San Antonio. And Selena was murdered because she fired Saldívar after finding out she was embezzling from both of her official Selena branded positions. Selena's murder was not some crazy stalker fan, it was it was an attempt at extortion by a business associate that escalated - She was meeting Saldívar to retrieve financial records Saldívar had been refusing to turn over, at the time of her death.
@@serebii666so corruption?
It was also her BEST FRIEND! If a “best friend” can do something so vile, what is stopping a complete stranger? I’m not saying she should be paranoid, but the wariness is definitely warranted!
@@serebii666she was also the head of her fan club from what I remember
Its crazy that people are using Taylor Swift as an example of "Oh look that's how you adjust with being a celebrity" when she has mentioned time and again in interviews and through her songs that she doesn't like this stuff! also in that clip, she is 18, and she is trying to convince herself that she chose this life so she has to live with the consequences! but what about her mentioning ""I'm not cut out for these hunters with cell phones"
people using taylor swift as an example of being well adjusted to fame seem to forget her disappearance during rep era. once that fame gets turned against you, it can be incredibly dangerous. people go from asking for hugs and selfies to death threats real quick.
edit: to clarify, i think asking for hugs is gross behavior 100% but it's weird behavior that has a more "positive connotation" to it if that makes sense. cus people see it as fans being "sweet" but it's still a breach of personal space
Doesn’t TSwift carry gauze around with her in case she gets shot by one of her stalkers( of which she has many)?
I have a famous relative. They have to tell themselves things to help them deal with their reality.
It sounds cool to be famous, until you personally know a famous person and realize that the lack of privacy can be absolutely miserable. My relative can’t even just go to the grocery store without weird randos taking their pic. We used to love going on late night runs to the store to get ingredients to make brownies, cookies, whatever we were feeling. I know it sounds so dramatic but I mourn the life I had before anyone knew my relative, when we could take our late night trips, be silly, do whatever we wanted as young free kids.
Some people are going to ask who they are. I live in Nashville and I see this behavior all the time.
I similarly have a famous family friend, who hasn't really been in the zeitgeist since the 80s (but there is a non-0 chance of hearing them on any given day) and looks practically unrecognizable. When I finally met them as an adult, security was *tight*, even as a massive group we had a security detail because they were with us. But even having known them my whole life as "that famous person," the security detail, and seeing them right off the stage, it was *so easy* to see them as just a normal person that you could sit across the table from and talk about anything with.
Though from the second hand experience I know it may not happen, or won't for a long time, I hope that some day things calm down and you can have another late night run with them.
Thank you for sharing your experience. I can't imagine just losing the opportunity to roll up to your favorite coffee shop after you become famous. Because people will stake it out just to see you/mob you.
There's that concept of 3rd spaces; a space after your home and work space (office/studio/etc.) A bookstore, or even grocery store can be that third space that helps give your life space, breadth and opportunity for fun like you and your relative. Losing 3rd spaces can be alienating especially when fame at such a massive scale essentially strips it away from you.
genuinely it is so confusing to me how people can sit here and have all of the resources to see the pattern of people in the industry being stalked and harassed to the point of death and still think this behavior is okay. like this is something that’s been documented time and time again. chappell has EVERY right to place boundaries that protect her from that.
she said at the beginning her art was DRAG, complete art/artist separation. y’all don’t go around calling bob the drag queen a cvnt for saying no to a picture so why is she any different 😭😭😭
Absolutely, but people still go off at drag queens for this. I remember when people were calling Trixie a bitch for not taking photos too.
Actually entitled fans do go around calling anyone and everyone with even the smallest bit of following a cvnt for not listening to them. Celebrity culture is completely fucked
Well it is been a bit of a problem for Trixie and Katya so i assume it’s a thing for Bob too.
I know what you’re angling at, but tbh the misogyny is equally dished out here. When drag queens refuse photos, hugs, etc, people get mad at them because they subconsciously still expect anyone remotely feminine to be overly accommodating, nicey-nice and compliant with requests. Even small-scale performers. Its not as different to women in the entertainment industry as ppl might hope 😭
I'll say it. Drag fans are some of the most delusional people. I watched someone have a crying meltdown outside a drag show because they didn't get enough time with the queens.
In the voice of Trixie Mattel, "Mary, you're one of 200 people in line for this meet and greet. This isn't the 'Only I meet and greet the cast' show.' " Like it's after the show and they're tired, about to move on to the next city. Say your quick piece and go. They're not your damn therapist.
i think Dolly Parton handled this best. You see, the trademark platinum blond has always been a wig. And she always appears to us dressed to the nines. But Dolly REALLY has brunette hair. And she goes out all the time and lots of people just don't see her because she is wearing "normal" clothes. She has been married for ages and is always out with her husband. I do think its awful that i am even saying this and i know it wouldnt work with someone like Taylor or Chappel now. I have seen lots of celebrities and purposefully did NOT approach them. I think people who do mob celebrities have no manners.
I didn’t know that about Dolly, so she was the OG hannah montanna 😂 that’s smart!
Chapell doesn’t have red hair though. Her name isn’t Chappell. The difference between her and Dolly is not their strategy, it’s the access their fans have to information. There are people who post her real name and her private social media as if they won a game for finding it.
@@GrungeGalactica That's funnier when you know that Dolly is Miley Cyrus' godmother
as awesome for Dolly as that is, it’s important to not fall into the habit of blaming the celebrity. fans should respect simple boundaries, celebrities shouldn’t have to go out of their way to keep themselves safe
I think the major difference is Dolly didn’t come into fame at the height of social media dependency. Everything got exponentially worse after Covid with chronically online behavior. Even Taylor didn’t have that when she was 17-18, not like it is now. Chappell exploded in 4 months, had no adjustment period, and probably didn’t even have a security team in place until recently.
Privacy isnt a privilege, so asing for it isnt entitlement
Exactly it's a basic human right
God fuckin damn
👏👏👏
God ... fuckin..damn👏👏👏
You ate with that one, completely agree
"Guys don't follow me around, harass the people in my life and try to learn every small detail about my life. Just enjoy my work and leave me alone."
God she's such a diva, who does she think she is requiring privacy? 🙄
On a much smaller scale, when I was pregnant, strangers would walk up to me and put their hands on my belly. Some would ask, others would just do it. They felt entitled to touch me. It’s just so weird.
I could not deal with fame. I feel sorry for them and will never understand people who lose their shit over celebrities or feel like they are entitled to anything involving another human being, especially a stranger.
The way regular physical boundaries with pregnant women just go out the window is weird as hell!! I don't think I could handle that. The list of people I am comfortable with touching me is short.
Ugh! How awful! Wtf is wrong with people to walk up and literally touch you and your baby? No. Just a big old barrel of nope.
Man, I am so glad that didn't happen to me when I was pregnant
Wow that's crazy that anyone would think that was okay to touch you like that without your consent just bc you're visibly pregnant, damn people need to learn boundaries that is so freaking weird, I'm sorry you had to deal with that!
the “i made you famous, you’d be nothing without me, you owe me for everything you have” attitude is abuser shit, hate to say it. i feel bad for the people in these “fans” personal lives.
i don't understand why the word consent isn't being used more in this conversation! consent matters just as much for photos and physical touch for her as it does for anybody else.
@@reda-exeit’s important to point out for sure! Most people also don’t seem to understand boundaries. They think they’re more important and deserve to take up this persons time. It’s so gross.
i’m SO grateful beyoncé set clear boundaries back in 2012. there is NO parasocial relationship, she makes it clear she is the ARTIST and y’all are the fans. she has complete control over when y’all receive products to consume, how much access and insight she gives into her life, and when she disappears again. y’all do NOT know that lady!
exactly, keep the peasants away
@@carolitoffananot even a “you’re peasants I’m a queen” mentality. It’s literally were strangers. She’s cordial and grateful but she makes sure boundaries are CLEAR
Bruh her fandom goes off the rails when anyone criticizes her. Lmfao 😂
@@fkfkfkl09505 yeah sure 😂
that part! @fkfkfkl09505 she constantly sends out gifts to fans, pays their rent/ tuition, expresses her love & gratitude EVERY time she sees them on stage, posts them on her website, etc etc. but she’s always made it clear they’re STRANGERS and to respect her privacy/space - and it worked!
I’m 53 and I’ve never been lured into parasocial relationships. I’ve always been someone who just consumes content full stop. I think I’ve always recognized that PEOPLE create that content and they are HUMAN. I have enough with my real life/social humans who are lovely and complex and engage with me. I don’t have interest in the strangers who create media I may enjoy. The only basic exceptions if you call it that- are comments that boost algorithms but I always see that more as engagement with the community at large. Everyone is entitled to their boundaries- always have been - hope we start honoring them soon.
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