Why have eight planets when you can have the Galaxy? Why have the Galaxy when you can have them all? Eight worlds is not enough, but it is the perfect place to start. Humanity will not and cannot settle for less, when we can have MORE.
Why have all the planets in the galaxy when you could disassemble them into swarms of O'Neill cylinders for millions of times the living area? Why stop there, when you can pull thousands of planets worth of building material out of each star by heating material until it escapes and putting back the hydrogen?
@KvAT in my second game one the xbox one when it first came out i had like 30 plaents before i meet one other species, then i subjegateted them Edit might have been my third or fourth
Humanity: the very definition of dream Big Build bigger Aliens: let's go to space Humanity: you I got this fucking crazy idea you know solar panels right. now but if we did that around an entire fucking sun Imagine the amount of power would you get out of that bitch or if we wanted to we could just turn into a giant fucking computer to simulate the universe or some fucking shit
basically the Terra federation was about 70-80% of the size of the Alliance, and honestly it would be easy to get the lower parts of the pyramid scheme to switch sides cause pretty much any deal they would get with humanity would be better. The Alliance itself is totally fessable so long as they remain the biggest fish in the pond, but if they meet a fish that can challenge them that's when things start to fall apart.
Add in the drifter fleets and they definitely outmatch the Alliance in power. Also need to remember that the Alliance operates from an assumed power dynamic of they are the bullies and the newly met species is the weak nerdy kid. It never occured to them there might be someone bigger and badder on the playground.
Humans: Hey you want to join our party we won't treat you like shit and will give you some awesome ass space shit Fucked over aliens: well when you put it like that *SIGN ME THE FUCK UP MY HOMIE*
Humanity: so you threaten us even though we're bigger than you do you wish to explode because we can sure as hell make that happen and you're going the right way about it if that's your end goal
this union: *meets humanity and assumes that there a small species and attempts to take advantage of them* humanity: your union is smol and you dare attempt to take advantage of us?
The face when your interstellar union of many species is summarily outnumbered and outclassed by the SINGLE species you THOUGHT was smaller than your smallest member.
They weren't outnumbered. The Galactic Community had 6 more planets then the Human Confederacy's 38 planets. Population wise, probably had double them though, we do like to breed :)
That does actually seem like how humanity might be when faced with that situation. Amicable until provocation. Hopeful until the disappointment. Yet still happy that solitude is over.
Humanity is ambition made flesh, lablonamenadonis a word that humans can never, and will never understand. With that note, anyone who tries to enforce it is gonna have a real bad awakening.
@@kabob0077 I think it in the 2nd part, the Terran Federation needs to seek "LEBENSRAUM" from this "alliance". When it is done... The Terran Federation will have 82 planets under its control, and a few creatures of the "alliance" in its zoos. Humans have a SAVAGE territorial imperative an will probably not tolerate any other sentient species.
*Humanity United has been formed* *The Imperium of Man has Declared War* *The UEP has Declared War* *The SGC has Declared War* *The UNSC has Declared War* *The Ancient Human Empire has Declared War* *The Systems Alliance has Declared War* *The Principality of Zeon has Declared War* *The Principality of Belka has Declared War* *Neo Zeon has Declared War* *Z.A.F.T has Declared War* *Strangereal has Declared War* *The Earth Federation has Declared War* *ORB has Declared War* *The EA has Declared War* *The Sleeves has Declared War* *The Legion of the Damned has Declared War*
@@Dasmaster1 Be mindful, the EA I mentioned means "Earth Alliance"... However they, and ZAFT for that matter, have a LONG list of War Crimes and atrocities that would make Zeon and the Titans say "chill the fuck out."
@@kabob0077 No No No, that is not the EA I am afraid of.. There is a much more terrifying EA and we can just hope it never stops making crappy games and switch to world conquest.
I think it ends there because the author couldn't satisfyingly end the story any other way, so they left it up to the audience to come up with what happens next
*Chuckles in historian* Oh Xeno, you do make me laugh, have you no lofty goals, no freedom to believe in the impossible? NO humanity begets more interest than mere survival. We are legion, we are a republic of people’s spanning generations, with unifications, civil conflict, and untold barbarism to decide merely whom leads. Let alone what we do! Ambition is our strength. And we shall never fall silent again.
Addendum: The Human ambassador says: "What kind of neighbors do you want us to be? Now, here are -- OUR -- "demands". He then looks up at the top rungs of the the hierarchy. You there, threatening the enslavement of our race and the destruction of our home world. We are coming for you. Your eight planets will be ours, together with their combined resources and we will crush your puny military forces. For the rest of you, you can decide if you want to remain in this alliance, or become a colony of the Terran Federation. You have 60 of our minutes to respond. Good day." as the Ambassador turns, and walks out of the chamber.
Humanity the only species to be the most caring benevolent and friendly species in all the galaxie while also having the capacity to commit unspeakable acts of monstrous violence on anyone who pisses them off Humanity has a dark side and we've had enough experience to know how the hell use it
@@IshijimaKairo The duality of man, a great quote from The Last Airbender “You Will Find That If You Look For The Light, You Can Often Find It... But If You Look For The Dark, That Is All You Will Ever See."
We do wanna be realistic though. As it says in the story, even terraforming a planet that is already marginal or partly habitable is a HUGE undertaking.
Timothy Cotner What about sealed colonies and orbital/space habitats? If you build a bunch of sealed arcologies with massive hydroponics facilities and the proper logistical installations, you don’t need to terraform the world.
You could have this effect by saying 'The 38 systems', instead of "38 planets". Its subtle, but it opens up the grandeur of possibilities without hitting you over the head with it. You wouldn't necessarily have more than one planet in a settled system with perhaps a few off world resource stations. At the other extreme, a single *'System'* could also be made up of many planets, many more moons, comet halo empires, Dyson swarms, orbital colonies and other exotica. Something like a really thoroughly colonized Solar System might look like after a few eons of humans mucking around. Such a phrasing would leave it more open ended to interpretation for how over the top humanity really is in this story.
I feel that some of these short stories are so awesome, that they deserve to be expanded upon, or have some sort of epilogue attached to them. This one among them.
dont a lot of Tau still not believe the size of the Empire. All so o live how the Tau when the expanded went against PDF forces and had no idea that soon space marines would be orbital dropping on top of there HQs
@@Andrewza1 i think they knownthat tge imperium is large what they certainly dont believe is its power they dont believe in magic and in the possibility that titans can exist
@@kubikkuratko188 Considering that Tau are battlesuit kings I think it stands to reason that they would at least understand the concept of the Titan, even if they dont understand the rationale behind their deployment, since well, When you start deploying warlord Titan's you may as well just begin orbital Bombardment.
For all the Centuries you were exploiting each other, We were simply Expanding. Now We are more than all of you added together. A 60 / 40 split in Our Favour I might suggest.
And then we blow their minds by showing them a few Isaac Arthur videos where we have already contemplated what it would take to move entire solar systems, lift material from stars, and up to and include survive til the end of the black holes epoch to see the last tickd of eternity's clock.
You also gotta realize how vengeful and downright hateful we can be if someone fucks with other humans. If the aliens bombed a human city/blew up a human transport ship...You best know We’re gonna be the fucking space orcs.
Why terraform planets when you can rip them apart for their resources. Why make a dyson sphere, when you can dissassemble the star for materials and fuel, and use them with vastly better efficency. Why make a habitat to live in when you can upload your civilization to live in computers.
because the first two are ungodly expensive to the point that it probably wont be worth it until far after the point where most science fiction takes place, and because the last one is subjet to the same problems as teleporters(it just kills you and makes a clone).
@@edibleturd where's the loss? the first two are great weapons and the last would be pretty cool. I think like me, therefore I am me. Fuck the existential crisis, ill go look at AI porn!
The only use humanity has for lablonamenadon is in filing it under stage one, part four, section seven of our plan for achieving intergalactic dominance. Parts 1-3 being achieve sentience, establish dominance as a species, and land on the moon, respectively. When we reach another solar system, we move on to stage two. Lablonamenadon only exists as the “oh shit, we fucked up and overestimated ourselves, time for the backup plan.”
Once they said we estimate eight planets to be enough, it became very obvious that they did not understand the idea of... Well honestly ambition. Especially once he said that they reached eight and then stopped. The reason that we decided against lunar colonies etc in the seventies and eighties was that our politicians knew that once they open an area, expansion is uncontrollable. It's the reason why they still don't permit any non-authorized colonies on Antarctica. The fact that it's unlivable means zero to humans. Right now I know of two dozen projects trying to build floating or anchored artificial Islands outside of national controls. I know of millions of vessels that sail the world, almost all of them answerable only to themselves. The idea that you would simply stop expanding because it was a waste of time? Yeah we're going to kill them.
I wish it continued on for a bit with the counsel’s tearful begging to revise their original offer to something more likely to not end in a massive war and there heads mounted on their high chairs.
To be fair, humanity really doesn't like being enslaved by our own kind. Imagine how that ambassador would feel from the threat of being enslaved by an alien species. He had REALLY good control of his emotions.
Most likely be crushed by the Ancient humans, due to the fact that those dudes held their own against the forrunners. Not sure if you meant us or the UNSC in ether case they'd probably win due to technology (Humans aren't really that advanced in halo, the only real advancement they have is the slip-space drive). The Covenant are a tough one, they have a large force yes but the question is are they at the same tech level as the alliance?
Samuel Croll yeah thats just cruel. they would not even be a blib on the imperiums radar. A milion worlds all bearing down on this lousy 44 planet federation.
@@victoriazilverentant5593 The interaction would be a side-arc in a Horus Heresy novel and by the end of the campaign the expeditionary fleet(s) sent to deal with them will move on, the planets of the Alliance cleansed of sapient xenos life and classified as 177-13 to 177-57 or something, the fist number stating which fleet conquered it and the second number stating how many planets were conquered before by the same fleet.
And thats just the united terran colonies. Korea, russia, china and countless corporations have at minimum 10 private colonies each. Now build that picket fence real tall xeno's, and we'll be just peachy with each other
With that many planets, I would expect there to be more like hundreds of trillions, not billions. With Earth alone we are already in the billions now. With the extent of a galactic empire, humanity could (and would) expand out to the trillions.
Not with the number of planets and such mentioned. Scientists think Earth can handle perhaps 10 billion humans on it. If you want to push that number up to assume some exoplanets can hold a lot more without environmental collapse, ok. But you're probably going to have to cap that at an average of 20 billion per planet. So that's 720 billion for the planets. 12 lunar colonies will have less populations each (moons tend to be smaller and not have as much habitable space), so let's say 120 billion (being generous here). We're up to 840 billion. The 15 asteroid settlements can't add more than a few million to a billion a piece, just due to being spread out, so let's say a billion a piece to be generous again. 855 billion. 23 Drifter Fleets. That's a nice variable, since who knows how large a drifter fleet is. But they're still ships, so I doubt they're going to pushing outside the million to billion range total. 856 billion for 38 planets, 12 lunar colonies, 15 asteroid settlements, and 23 drifter fleets. Yes, this is mere speculation, but based on the Earth = 10 billion people max estimate, it's fair.
Great episode and interesting. I heard 1 episode that ended in Doctors without borders. I'd like to know, if you know, the name of it. Thanks I'll be listening, and checking the like comments if you do know it. to more episodes, Thank You.
You're a really good hfy reader my man. Wish you'd come back to it. Agro squirrel and met narrator have made it well. I know your thing going but this is something else you got massive talent with
The idea that you would strain yourself for the minimum possible is one that we see with some humans. We very rarely have nice terms for them. The idea that you would be content with the minimum required, makes a great employee but absolutely none of the businesses, religions or states that exist right now could have been founded by a race where that was the accepted behavior. Humanity doesn't do that. We work 8 hours in the US now because one businessman realized that working his employees 12-hours a day, 6 days a week wore them out. Other parts of the world 12 14 and 16 hour days are still common, almost exclusively because... The only workers that accept those sort of hours are people who are just the side of slave labor.
"What kinda neighbors do you want us to be." Less then a few minutes with aliens and humans drop a fucking power move. XD
“8 planets to survive a catastrophe? So 38 is overkill?”
38 is a good start
@@youngbloodbanana3376 I prefer a good 400 to start with.
@@kabob0077 a bit hard for the first year in space
@@youngbloodbanana3376 Maybe so, but it's always nice to establish a lot of colonies quickly.
Well, if you have the resources for them.
@@kabob0077 your right spred and claim planets
Why have eight planets when you can have the Galaxy? Why have the Galaxy when you can have them all? Eight worlds is not enough, but it is the perfect place to start. Humanity will not and cannot settle for less, when we can have MORE.
To quote another HFY story: HUMANITY IS RAVENOUS
Humans the ultimate conquerors as, "Enough is never enough."
Why have all the planets in the galaxy when you could disassemble them into swarms of O'Neill cylinders for millions of times the living area? Why stop there, when you can pull thousands of planets worth of building material out of each star by heating material until it escapes and putting back the hydrogen?
As the Emperor said, The Stars are Humanities to rule
@@ethanburn8574 The Emperor protects.
When you meet Federation Builders in Stellaris
@KvAT in my second game one the xbox one when it first came out i had like 30 plaents before i meet one other species, then i subjegateted them
Edit might have been my third or fourth
@@johnuthus xbox ver is confusing as fuck
I imagine that a group shooting for lablonamenadon would never have developed ideas like the Kardashev scale or the Dyson sphere.
Humanity: the very definition of dream Big Build bigger
Aliens: let's go to space
Humanity: you I got this fucking crazy idea you know solar panels right. now but if we did that around an entire fucking sun
Imagine the amount of power would you get out of that bitch or if we wanted to we could just turn into a giant fucking computer to simulate the universe or some fucking shit
@Josh Armstrong or try to run crysis
basically the Terra federation was about 70-80% of the size of the Alliance, and honestly it would be easy to get the lower parts of the pyramid scheme to switch sides cause pretty much any deal they would get with humanity would be better. The Alliance itself is totally fessable so long as they remain the biggest fish in the pond, but if they meet a fish that can challenge them that's when things start to fall apart.
44 planets vs 38 planets, 12 luner colonies and 15 asteroids humans might be closer to 90% or might actually be stronger than the Alliance
Add in the drifter fleets and they definitely outmatch the Alliance in power. Also need to remember that the Alliance operates from an assumed power dynamic of they are the bullies and the newly met species is the weak nerdy kid. It never occured to them there might be someone bigger and badder on the playground.
So it may not be 44 planets fighting, but less. Since some joined the humans in fighting the alliance
Honestly this is just a good analogy for America v the rest of the other countries
Humans: Hey you want to join our party we won't treat you like shit and will give you some awesome ass space shit
Fucked over aliens: well when you put it like that *SIGN ME THE FUCK UP MY HOMIE*
Ruling the universe requires greed, humans are greed and ambition given form.
Humanity: so you threaten us even though we're bigger than you do you wish to explode because we can sure as hell make that happen and you're going the right way about it if that's your end goal
humans are space orks, we love to fight and to rage war, we only use are brains to develop new ways to kill and have war
These humans have probably invented black hole bombs or something that can wipeout a system
@@johnuthus "rage war"
You don't survive the four billion year old darwinian corpse pile by being meek.
this union: *meets humanity and assumes that there a small species and attempts to take advantage of them*
humanity: your union is smol and you dare attempt to take advantage of us?
Humanity: You're adorable.
The face when your interstellar union of many species is summarily outnumbered and outclassed by the SINGLE species you THOUGHT was smaller than your smallest member.
ShadwSonic I want to see that face
@@jackmack4181 You and me both.
That is a flex on a literal galactic level
Aliens: 8 and then we stop
Humanity: *MAXIMUM EFFORT AND MAXIMUM EVERYTHING*
@@josharmstrong8813 humans: LOOKS A PLAENT, MOM CAN I HAVE IT????
mom: sure take it
They weren't outnumbered. The Galactic Community had 6 more planets then the Human Confederacy's 38 planets. Population wise, probably had double them though, we do like to breed :)
That does actually seem like how humanity might be when faced with that situation. Amicable until provocation. Hopeful until the disappointment.
Yet still happy that solitude is over.
Humans are so lonely we've befriended almost every animal on our planet
Imagine the excitement of finding another intelligent species the fear and excitement for a companion
To me, this is one of my faveorites. I love how this story turned the tables.
While I was reading it I realized I could get angry. Honestly this was one of my favorite narrations to date.
This story got me into hfy stories about two years ago. I revisit it from time to time and always love it.
Humanity is ambition made flesh, lablonamenadonis a word that humans can never, and will never understand. With that note, anyone who tries to enforce it is gonna have a real bad awakening.
We have a word starting with an "L" and its German for "Living Space". Do we need some? Yes, yes we do because it is our right.
kabob 007 oh no...
@@kabob0077 I think it in the 2nd part, the Terran Federation needs to seek "LEBENSRAUM" from this "alliance". When it is done... The Terran Federation will have 82 planets under its control, and a few creatures of the "alliance" in its zoos. Humans have a SAVAGE territorial imperative an will probably not tolerate any other sentient species.
@@AgentPepsi1 No, those Xenos get the gas!
@@kabob0077 I just belted out so loud I think my neighbors could hear it through the walls, you win das interwebz!
*The Terran Federation has declared war*
*Humanity United has been formed*
*The Imperium of Man has Declared War*
*The UEP has Declared War*
*The SGC has Declared War*
*The UNSC has Declared War*
*The Ancient Human Empire has Declared War*
*The Systems Alliance has Declared War*
*The Principality of Zeon has Declared War*
*The Principality of Belka has Declared War*
*Neo Zeon has Declared War*
*Z.A.F.T has Declared War*
*Strangereal has Declared War*
*The Earth Federation has Declared War*
*ORB has Declared War*
*The EA has Declared War*
*The Sleeves has Declared War*
*The Legion of the Damned has Declared War*
*The Alliance had declared we are fucked*
@@kabob0077 EA scares me the most.
@@Dasmaster1 Be mindful, the EA I mentioned means "Earth Alliance"... However they, and ZAFT for that matter, have a LONG list of War Crimes and atrocities that would make Zeon and the Titans say "chill the fuck out."
@@kabob0077 No No No, that is not the EA I am afraid of.. There is a much more terrifying EA and we can just hope it never stops making crappy games and switch to world conquest.
Expected something after the “what kind of neighbors do you want us to be”
So much potential.
I think it ends there because the author couldn't satisfyingly end the story any other way, so they left it up to the audience to come up with what happens next
The best way to end it.
Actually that is the perfect place to follow up with "We respond in kind." th-cam.com/video/mpnVyhcyPfk/w-d-xo.html
Purge the xenos!
*Chuckles in historian* Oh Xeno, you do make me laugh, have you no lofty goals, no freedom to believe in the impossible? NO humanity begets more interest than mere survival. We are legion, we are a republic of people’s spanning generations, with unifications, civil conflict, and untold barbarism to decide merely whom leads. Let alone what we do! Ambition is our strength. And we shall never fall silent again.
6 years ago and still one of the best hfy stories around
The council shadow may have covered the man but his shadow dwarfed theirs
Nah. He covered in shadow at first then just pulls an Uno Reverse card and casts it on them
Addendum: The Human ambassador says: "What kind of neighbors do you want us to be? Now, here are -- OUR -- "demands". He then looks up at the top rungs of the the hierarchy. You there, threatening the enslavement of our race and the destruction of our home world. We are coming for you. Your eight planets will be ours, together with their combined resources and we will crush your puny military forces. For the rest of you, you can decide if you want to remain in this alliance, or become a colony of the Terran Federation. You have 60 of our minutes to respond. Good day." as the Ambassador turns, and walks out of the chamber.
just imagine a human space fleet shows up right after he walks out to escort him back to his home planet or astriod, or outpost.
This is totally headcanon 😂😂
“What kind of neighbors do you want us to be” this sent shivers down my spine holy fuck that’s a menacing sentence.
Checkpoints
8:07 council begins
15:41 never piss off a human
Nice but skipping reduces the impact of the tale.
Your username was my nickname in high school.
Humanity the only species to be the most caring benevolent and friendly species in all the galaxie while also having the capacity to commit unspeakable acts of monstrous violence on anyone who pisses them off
Humanity has a dark side and we've had enough experience to know how the hell use it
@@josharmstrong8813 Caring? Benevolent? FRIENDLY? You must be joking.
@@IshijimaKairo The duality of man, a great quote from The Last Airbender “You Will Find That If You Look For The Light, You Can Often Find It... But If You Look For The Dark, That Is All You Will Ever See."
I cant help feeling that it would have been more fun with a number of planets at least over the 200s
We do wanna be realistic though. As it says in the story, even terraforming a planet that is already marginal or partly habitable is a HUGE undertaking.
Timothy Cotner What about sealed colonies and orbital/space habitats? If you build a bunch of sealed arcologies with massive hydroponics facilities and the proper logistical installations, you don’t need to terraform the world.
@@fadelsukoco3092 true but then there will always be the risk of breaches or mass system failures wich could kill all but the best designed habitats
I'm rather fond of the Dyson swarm idea myself. Why terraform a world when you can build them.
You could have this effect by saying 'The 38 systems', instead of "38 planets". Its subtle, but it opens up the grandeur of possibilities without hitting you over the head with it.
You wouldn't necessarily have more than one planet in a settled system with perhaps a few off world resource stations. At the other extreme, a single *'System'* could also be made up of many planets, many more moons, comet halo empires, Dyson swarms, orbital colonies and other exotica. Something like a really thoroughly colonized Solar System might look like after a few eons of humans mucking around. Such a phrasing would leave it more open ended to interpretation for how over the top humanity really is in this story.
That outlines humanity quite nicely
@shadowyeager I know right
For a diplomat with no discernable emotion given, this reading sure sounds constantly ecstatic
The Terran Federation is OP.
Lablonamenadon is a cool concept
Just figured out it only means too big to fail
I hear the word, "Honor Guard" and I think of the Prophets' Sangheili guards above all else.
i heard "honor guard" and i immediately think hit squad, but that's just me.
@@darrvenomfier790 i can see it both ways honestly :P
I think Palpatine's honour guard (the red bois - senate guard)
@@darrvenomfier790 probably because that’s pretty much what they were
Aliens: 8 planets
Humans: that’s cute
I feel that some of these short stories are so awesome, that they deserve to be expanded upon, or have some sort of epilogue attached to them. This one among them.
Holy shit, this whole thing gave me shivers WHILE making me cackle like a madman. Excellent story, and fantastic delivery!
Similar energy to "Do you want a happy god or a vengeful god?"
Humanity on hearing the size of the Alliance: Those are rookie numbers. We gotta pump those up!
Lablon-a-stupidon
Long Live Humanity
This is similar to what happened with the Tau in 40k
Topkek
dont a lot of Tau still not believe the size of the Empire. All so o live how the Tau when the expanded went against PDF forces and had no idea that soon space marines would be orbital dropping on top of there HQs
@@Andrewza1 i think they knownthat tge imperium is large what they certainly dont believe is its power they dont believe in magic and in the possibility that titans can exist
@@kubikkuratko188 Considering that Tau are battlesuit kings I think it stands to reason that they would at least understand the concept of the Titan, even if they dont understand the rationale behind their deployment, since well, When you start deploying warlord Titan's you may as well just begin orbital Bombardment.
For all the Centuries you were exploiting each other, We were simply Expanding.
Now We are more than all of you added together.
A 60 / 40 split in Our Favour I might suggest.
And then we blow their minds by showing them a few Isaac Arthur videos where we have already contemplated what it would take to move entire solar systems, lift material from stars, and up to and include survive til the end of the black holes epoch to see the last tickd of eternity's clock.
The imperium of man has entered the game.
Definitely an HFY ending, love it!
It took me like 5 minutes of reading that word to give up pronouncing it until i heard you say it. How does one create such a word? :D
ALIENS
To be fair if the word was made with human languge cues in the thought process we would probably do this
Lab'lon'amenadon
XENOS
If you listen closely, right at the end of the video you can hear giorno's theme playing
"We will drop the full weight, OF FORTY FOUR PLA-...what....why are you laughing? WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING????"
You also gotta realize how vengeful and downright hateful we can be if someone fucks with other humans. If the aliens bombed a human city/blew up a human transport ship...You best know We’re gonna be the fucking space orcs.
awesome. The rest of the story? You can't end it like this.
Why terraform planets when you can rip them apart for their resources.
Why make a dyson sphere, when you can dissassemble the star for materials and fuel, and use them with vastly better efficency.
Why make a habitat to live in when you can upload your civilization to live in computers.
Aapeli Huhtinen filthy materialist
@@jonathanhamilton6190
I think you mean Fanatic Materialist ;)
because the first two are ungodly expensive to the point that it probably wont be worth it until far after the point where most science fiction takes place, and because the last one is subjet to the same problems as teleporters(it just kills you and makes a clone).
Calm down Isaac Arthur
@@edibleturd where's the loss? the first two are great weapons and the last would be pretty cool. I think like me, therefore I am me. Fuck the existential crisis, ill go look at AI porn!
That moment when a noob enters the PVP zone for the first time, only to discover just how outclassed they are.
The only use humanity has for lablonamenadon is in filing it under stage one, part four, section seven of our plan for achieving intergalactic dominance. Parts 1-3 being achieve sentience, establish dominance as a species, and land on the moon, respectively.
When we reach another solar system, we move on to stage two. Lablonamenadon only exists as the “oh shit, we fucked up and overestimated ourselves, time for the backup plan.”
Nah we expand it to mean 8 planets.
Per star.
Only a few dozen worlds. What aspiring K2 is that supposed to be.
Once they said we estimate eight planets to be enough, it became very obvious that they did not understand the idea of... Well honestly ambition. Especially once he said that they reached eight and then stopped. The reason that we decided against lunar colonies etc in the seventies and eighties was that our politicians knew that once they open an area, expansion is uncontrollable. It's the reason why they still don't permit any non-authorized colonies on Antarctica. The fact that it's unlivable means zero to humans. Right now I know of two dozen projects trying to build floating or anchored artificial Islands outside of national controls. I know of millions of vessels that sail the world, almost all of them answerable only to themselves. The idea that you would simply stop expanding because it was a waste of time? Yeah we're going to kill them.
Humans: Do you dare oppose us mortal?
This gave me goosebumps in places I didn't know I could get goosebumps.
Absolutely beautiful story once again professionally spoken with well conveyed "crescendo" exemplary of HFY.
Man I wish we could have gotten their response to the last question and aftermath.
This man drove a short notice jalopy rental to a galactic first contact meeting and they assumed that was the best we had. Good move
I wish it continued on for a bit with the counsel’s tearful begging to revise their original offer to something more likely to not end in a massive war and there heads mounted on their high chairs.
This is easily my favorite HFY.
Dawg ive found your channel some days ago youre great.
Ahhh yes this is why it come to this channel
When the human asks "what if we don't" I knew something was up
To be fair, humanity really doesn't like being enslaved by our own kind. Imagine how that ambassador would feel from the threat of being enslaved by an alien species. He had REALLY good control of his emotions.
@@chrisdefresne3235 easy to have control of your emotions when you're an adult- and some pudgy kid with a mouth is talking smack.
I feel like an appropriate song to match the tone of this, towards the end, would be We're Not Gonna Take It, by Twisted Sister
I wonder what this "Alliance" could do against the Ancient Humans of Halo, Modern Humans, and the Covenant? Probably not much.
Most likely be crushed by the Ancient humans, due to the fact that those dudes held their own against the forrunners. Not sure if you meant us or the UNSC in ether case they'd probably win due to technology (Humans aren't really that advanced in halo, the only real advancement they have is the slip-space drive). The Covenant are a tough one, they have a large force yes but the question is are they at the same tech level as the alliance?
Heck that imagine the imperium of man from 40k
Samuel Croll yeah thats just cruel. they would not even be a blib on the imperiums radar. A milion worlds all bearing down on this lousy 44 planet federation.
Daniel Zilverentant You forget that the Imperium doesn't care about that, there's 44 Xeno infested planets inside their borders.
@@victoriazilverentant5593 The interaction would be a side-arc in a Horus Heresy novel and by the end of the campaign the expeditionary fleet(s) sent to deal with them will move on, the planets of the Alliance cleansed of sapient xenos life and classified as 177-13 to 177-57 or something, the fist number stating which fleet conquered it and the second number stating how many planets were conquered before by the same fleet.
He sounds like a serial killer and I AM HERE FOR IT! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! "What kind of neighbors do you want us to be?" That f*ing broke me, oh my stars!
So, you want to play Empire! Hold my beer. ;)
Beautiful!! And congrats!!
I'm very excited
Earth is badass🌎😎
This one is my favorite, this is actually the video that introduced me to r/HFY
One of the few really well written HFY stories that are not just stupid jingoism
I love how he basically just said you guys are small fish trying to act like sharks don't make Humanity School you
this was great
This is an amazing story
Complacency.
Always show up in a scrapper, then see how they treat you.
OH SHIT. bruh i was not expecting that ending lmao king shit
Terran Federation OP pls nerf.
They sent Dr. Phil at the aliens
Dude I love your work ^^ thank you
And thats just the united terran colonies. Korea, russia, china and countless corporations have at minimum 10 private colonies each. Now build that picket fence real tall xeno's, and we'll be just peachy with each other
only thing this seems to be missing is him saying, "and if you would like to be slave keepers then we will have a few words"
that's a mouthful
First time viewer and you've got a new sub. 😊
When life finally gives you a break after heaping shit on you over and over again, feels good.
With that many planets, I would expect there to be more like hundreds of trillions, not billions. With Earth alone we are already in the billions now. With the extent of a galactic empire, humanity could (and would) expand out to the trillions.
Not with the number of planets and such mentioned. Scientists think Earth can handle perhaps 10 billion humans on it. If you want to push that number up to assume some exoplanets can hold a lot more without environmental collapse, ok. But you're probably going to have to cap that at an average of 20 billion per planet. So that's 720 billion for the planets. 12 lunar colonies will have less populations each (moons tend to be smaller and not have as much habitable space), so let's say 120 billion (being generous here). We're up to 840 billion. The 15 asteroid settlements can't add more than a few million to a billion a piece, just due to being spread out, so let's say a billion a piece to be generous again. 855 billion. 23 Drifter Fleets. That's a nice variable, since who knows how large a drifter fleet is. But they're still ships, so I doubt they're going to pushing outside the million to billion range total. 856 billion for 38 planets, 12 lunar colonies, 15 asteroid settlements, and 23 drifter fleets. Yes, this is mere speculation, but based on the Earth = 10 billion people max estimate, it's fair.
24:56 fuckin' mic drop
The Courier. Mike drop! Hell, he just showed them the size of gauntlet held, and wanted to see if they would like to see IT dripped!
I found it quite enjoyable.
Diplomacy, that's how it's done. (big smile)
Great episode and interesting. I heard 1 episode that ended in Doctors without borders. I'd like to know, if you know, the name of it. Thanks I'll be listening, and checking the like comments if you do know it. to more episodes, Thank You.
God I hate stories like that
hey bro iust so you know im still watching you
im a fan 🖐🖐🖐
If they done what they said at about 15:00 then they would get to know what Americans felt in Nam, Baby.
You're a really good hfy reader my man. Wish you'd come back to it. Agro squirrel and met narrator have made it well. I know your thing going but this is something else you got massive talent with
That was very interesting!
what is this series, is there continue?
We respond in kind is basically a sequel
You call it lablonamenadon and take a thousand years, we call it wednesday."
In the far anterior funny future there is only humarghn.
I wonder what’s going to happen next? I hope there’s more, I’m completely hook!
Make a reply and Ill remeber where this particular video is :)
Whp wrote this?
the Reddit user named "NogoodIDnames". he has quite a few stories that you can find on the HFY (HumanityFuckYeah) Subreddit. Hes an excellent author
Moar
Good story, well read I'm just glad you didn't try to sing because you couldn't carry a tune across the street in a bucket
Why did he ended?
Lol love it
Hehehehehehe stellaris
Hello dear comment reader. ... I dare you to use the word lablonamenadon in conversation today. Bouns points if you can do it with a strait face.
Interesting.
The idea that you would strain yourself for the minimum possible is one that we see with some humans. We very rarely have nice terms for them. The idea that you would be content with the minimum required, makes a great employee but absolutely none of the businesses, religions or states that exist right now could have been founded by a race where that was the accepted behavior. Humanity doesn't do that. We work 8 hours in the US now because one businessman realized that working his employees 12-hours a day, 6 days a week wore them out. Other parts of the world 12 14 and 16 hour days are still common, almost exclusively because... The only workers that accept those sort of hours are people who are just the side of slave labor.