Hi Friends! Thank you all for watching. Make sure to subscribe. Upcoming shows in New Jersey, Burlington, Stamford CT. www.joshjohnsoncomedy.com/tour for tix
I had a bad day and you mde me laugh the entire time. Thank you so much. (I m very appreciative 😀) Also, when you make the gesture when reaching for the toilet paper and you just stare straight ahead...your expression is priceles :D
@@Sylph70 Did Josh jog some memories of you getting your ass beat on Black Friday or some bad toilet paper experiences?, I sense some stress in your comment😂
I mean, this is exactly my thought on how best to deal with this. Of course, I usually check to make sure there is adequate roll before I commit, so I can't say I've ever had to deal with this before...
As someone who worked 20 years of retail... I HATE BLACK FRIDAY!!!! I have so many stories, but the one that comes to mind is one year at Walmart I got pinned to a shelf with a complete stranger next to the electronics section because of the sheer number of people trying to get to the department. We just silently stared into each other's eyes thinking to one another "We will get through this." I worked produce people!
Especially the last ones of Rocky 🥊 Gervais, who was only punching down and even Chapelle was dissapointing, he really needs to get off the LGBTQ jokes, coz now it's a pattern and whatever happened to pinching up, like a Katt Williams or in the old days George Carlin, my favorite white stand up comedian!! The best ones never get a special, it's a fake business and lots of the Comedians we know (Kevin Hart, Cedric the Entertainer, Will Smith, Steve Harvey, Chris Tucker and others) and who never did the stand up gigs the real ones do, that's why Katt has outed them all in a few interviews on here, like Shay ... (?) for not writing their own material to them being a group, who tried to black ball Katt ao comedians, weird stories abt P. Diddy, who send Hakeem Jeffries from Empire to Will fit mentoring and he left the house screaming and went into a very dark path afterwards and his career is over. This year Katt's gonna expose them all and I'm taking a front seat!🍿🥤😅
@@celestialnubian I know I get a bit too exited on here sometimes, doesn't mean you have to be rude about, you don't have to read it! So be a bit nicer and don't respond at all or come with some building criticism!!
@@annainspain5176 I have a pocket full of tissue wherever I go. It's not just for the toilet, all it takes is one bad sneeze and it's a whole lotta mess. 😂
See, this is why women like me carry around our packs of tissue paper. Women's bathrooms run out of toilet paper so often you have to carry that emergency supply! 😅
Just FYI: these days the good deals don't even happen on Black Friday anymore. BF is just the leftover shit that they reprice to make it look lower. The actual deals are 2 weeks before.
There was only one deal on black friday deal as far as i was aware. Target took $150 off PS5's, shits were gone at 6 am. Technically it was the model Sony said they weren't producing anymore but the disc model's just better anyway.
@@Zevox144 Right, it's always some leftover bs. I think the only deal I missed was on my processor. I could have for sure saved like ~$60 on that setup, but that's also because I didn't need the overclocked Ryzen 5 (the overclocking is pointless on those as they already turbo up to 5ghz)
This is always what it was. A chance for the manufacturers to get rid of stock in prep for the next season. Any sale, that is what it is about, no matter what the timing. If it looks cheaper, it's because they been lying throughout the year and no one notices.! The UK folk looked at Americans doing the BF thing and always thought it was insane. Until that influential culture a few years ago somehow got on a plane a flew over and WE have it now? Why? 😆🤣🤣🤣🤣
Had a rough day, been sick, just got off my second job and was looking for something to watch with my dinner. Almost choked on my food several times but it was worth it. Made my day! The bathroom bit was too funny 🤣 Please don’t ever stop doing comedy!!!!
I feel you on 2nd job….Not easy working two jobs on a daily basis. The stress lowers our immune system and we end up getting sick. Hope u get better soon….Hang in there.
@@angelrivera9227 I really appreciate those kind words and thank you!! ❤️These moments are temporary (hopefully) and health is the most important thing. Stay safe as well!!!
I'm in stitches on the bus with tears rolling down my face. Some one asked if I was ok. All I could get out is "Josh Johnson... Comedian". Passenger replied with the only chuckle, " Oh I understand". 🤣🤣🤣🤩
I don't even menstruate now and I still make sure I've got pads and tampons, and wet wipes. The Cotonelle flushable ones. Ibs is a cruel mistress, so I never go to the bathroom without the wipes (though I don't flush them in public). Even if I'm about to mess my pants, I check for tp! 😂 Too many memories as a teen (pre-cellphones) having to wait for someone to come in to sheepishly ask for tp. There should be a slider on the front of the door, above toddler reach, that you can slide across if the stall is out of tp or clogged. Just a red or green bar. That's all it needs.
when he mentioned the "oh they're out of toilet paper" "i got you girl" thing i full chested laughed out loud bc we really will just do the claw under the wall or door 😭😭 i've given pads and tampons to the most random ass people and never saw their faces
@@Queenofhearts360Rarely, but yeah. I've found that I'd prefer my OWN bodily gross than to sit on someone ELSE'S though ... so I am wiping that thing down alllll the time 😅 HECK, sometimes I'm even giving it a spit clean 😂
For a while there, it felt like it was getting worse every year. First a fight, then a stampede, and didn't people die? The news footage from that era is terrifying...
Black Friday in the 90s was my number one fear because of that footage LOL. That and that one footage of the Michael Jackson concert where women in the audience were pulling out their hair and peeing on themselves. Absolutely scarred for life.
Dulce Sloan is already there...they could kill it as hosts for the Daily Show as Hold Up shows. Soft spot for Ronny Cheng too or Klepper if it's all sausage.
Man I LOVE Josh Johnson. I could listen to him reading the yellow pages. But anyone else out there with IBS giggling at this adorable amateur move? (ALWAYS check the roll first…)
Okay, see that's the next level thinking I wouldn't have even considered! I'd call the person I'm with, perhaps call out, or if desperate enough, and it seemed the coast was clear, I'd penguin waddle to the next stall, but I wouldn't think to call a restaurant to tell them I needed assistance. I don't think about places like that having people you can talk to, or that they wouldn't tell the whole staff and laugh at me.
What blew my mind about black Friday was people would go be violent over retail literally HOURS after the holiday that's supposed to be focused on being humble and thankful for the things we already have in our lives 😂
1. ALWAYS LOOK FIRST! 🤣 2. Toilet seat covers are the next best thing 3. Just gotta wait for someone to come in the stall next to you lol 4. Call the person you're with- they gotta tell the staff for you lbs
Thinking you're nasty for using the last of the toilet paper sounds like an anxiety thing, I wouldn't feel wired at all. But we all got our hang ups lol. 🤣 Give the bulb a chance to act right!
I once told a worker at this restaurant that they were out of toilet paper and he just said "ew." 😂 then proceeded to not restock the tp and do other things instead
I'm Australian and almost none of your content has the relevance here that it has there but I LOVE your brand of comedy and have been binging for hours. Hilarious! And considered. And also not cruel or hurtful. Thank you!!!
I think some of the folks who loved live black friday ended up storming the capitol. They missed the thrill and they didn't understand while you might be welcome to fight in a retail store, you get arrested for fighting to get into the capitol.
Oh shoot!! I started laughing so hard at “ended up storming the capitol”! Oh gawd, I couldn’t even see the rest of your comment for a min. My eyes were full on blurry😂😂😂. Thank you. The video is over but I’m not done being amused. I think I’ll go find another Josh video.
I’m glad I didn’t break the rules and record while he was performing this set in Arlington when I came to see him last weekend because this was👌🏽 AN EPIC PERFORMANCE 🎭
I think part of what I enjoy about Josh's comedy is the delivery. There's a hesitancy. Almost as if he's sorry to bother us with the information, which then rolls into some outrageous tale like the toilet paper at Denny's. I keep checking Netflix, waiting for his first full-length special. It's going to be awesome.
Saw a Santa get arrested at 4 am in a Black Friday line at Target once. That wasn’t even the craziest thing that happened in that line. Used to go shopping on BF to buy the most random things that no one was fighting over. It was the only day every year my social anxiety took a break so I could enjoy the chaos. This was at a time I refused to shop on Wednesdays because that’s when most stores offer senior discounts and it gets busy out there. Thankfully there was only one instance of actual violence I witnessed. Didn’t dampen the day because the guy who got punched had it coming.
I'm coming back and watching this again after a few months, and just got the wildest sense memory of where I was and what I was doing the first time I listened. That's a sign of a good show right there lol
This is unprecedented! I can honestly rely on a weekly brand-new, topical special from you and it warms my heart. I believe your specials have surpassed FDR's "fireside chats" in their iconic legendary status, and ability to soothe a nation through troubled times
Love this set, so relatable! From me, Nicole Marie Zanders. I am so happy tonight that my father's procedures went ok. He will be 84 on December 21st. I just made stir fry bbq pineapple chicken with red, green and yellow bell peppers from our garden and onions and white rice, steamed green beans and brussel sprouts with a green salad with chopped cheddar cheese and ham for my Mom and Dad. Dad just had a colonoscopy and endoscopy this morning and I had to cook non fiber food for the past 2 days and the 3rd day all liquids while Mom wanted regular food, roasted potatoes with skin, baked chicken and for breakfast; bacon, scrambled eggs ( Dad had boiled eggs) buttery grits ( Dad could eat them) and about 6 slices of white toast instead of wheat, cottage cheese, pineapple slices, fruit cottail and bacon.❤ Never married. No children. Just taking care of my parents until I die.
Excellent, as always. I've now consumed every video you have posted. It's been great watching you go from strength to strength. I don't understand why you don't have 500k followers already. Or a million. Maybe the counter's not working properly. Try kicking it. 2024's going to be your year, and you really deserve it. And solid gold shoes. And a hat made of caviar, or whatever it is that superstars wear!
I know you likely won't see this, but you've been my favorite comedian for years now and I'm so excited because my mom got me tickets to see you on Friday for my birthday. So, I'd like to thank you in advance for making my birthday awesome. I cannot wait to see your stand up live!
Such enjoyable content throughout this whole video. An delicious treat full of non-stop laughter.Being teleported from my long day here in ILLINOIS into each secene of where your stories took place was so therapeutic. Allowing me to relax. Releasing some stress while being filled with Joy 😹 Your ability in telling stories is so natural as breathing. What aprecious gift Josh you have 🎁 The ability to capture a person's attention so easily. Then bring them on an journey with you in the story. While painting imagery with your words detailed with animation & effects. Never boring your audience mind you. Transporting us into the space and time of the event your describing in the stories Josh is remarkable❤Don't ever stop nurturing that precious gift of your special storytelling abilities honey. Wow such capability of capturing people heart's deeply. Just envisioning now getting excited for you of all the possibilities how one could use that gift Josh Johnson you have in positive healthy ways. Making such an profound impact on this Earth. Dreaming about you Josh Johnson occupying an lecture hall setting imparting wisdom & inspiring millions. Using your story telling abilities to touch people's heart's and change their lives for the better. I'm speaking this into your life ❤️ Declaring and declaring Josh Johnson will be a ray of light to many in this generation. Making history transforming lives for the better. In return making this world a better place to live ❣️ Claiming it is happening. You Josh Johnson were born for such a time🎉 Paraphrasing from The book of Esther. The Ride down Black Friday memory lane from watching a short piece of your set was eye opening how people in society can quickly become unhinged turning into savages. Very edifying yet so refreshingly full of truth.
A few years ago, I went to Game Stop on Black Friday for a Nintendo Switch. It was the second year that the system had been out, and online shopping was available, so the experience was honestly so pleasant and refreshing. It was just so stress-free that I couldn't believe it, as a veteran of the crazy days.
You are an absolutely brilliant comedian I pray to the lucky stars you make it big You are an absolute rockstar So glad I found you I tell my Ppl bout you when they’ll listen lolz Trying to get ppl to click a link of someone they don’t know takes bribery 😂😂
Hi Friends! Thank you all for watching. Make sure to subscribe. Upcoming shows in New Jersey, Burlington, Stamford CT. www.joshjohnsoncomedy.com/tour for tix
I usually love your stuff, but you could have deleted the first 15 minutes of this 17 minute video.
Hi friends???!!😂😂😂😂
You are a great comedian, not many that can make me burst out w laughter the way u do.I could listen to u for hours.
Thank you!
I had a bad day and you mde me laugh the entire time. Thank you so much. (I m very appreciative 😀) Also, when you make the gesture when reaching for the toilet paper and you just stare straight ahead...your expression is priceles :D
@@Sylph70 Did Josh jog some memories of you getting your ass beat on Black Friday or some bad toilet paper experiences?, I sense some stress in your comment😂
Don't shame the person who tells you the toilet paper is out. They are saving the next person.
They are a martyr for the cause
I had someone call me while on the toilet to tell me we were out of toilet paper in our restroom 😂😂😂😂
@@Ayyeewest29 Fuken brilliant lmao
They are making me think they have an incomplete wipe
I mean, this is exactly my thought on how best to deal with this. Of course, I usually check to make sure there is adequate roll before I commit, so I can't say I've ever had to deal with this before...
As someone who worked 20 years of retail... I HATE BLACK FRIDAY!!!! I have so many stories, but the one that comes to mind is one year at Walmart I got pinned to a shelf with a complete stranger next to the electronics section because of the sheer number of people trying to get to the department. We just silently stared into each other's eyes thinking to one another "We will get through this." I worked produce people!
lol, that's heinous. Hope you have a Merry Christmas this year!
Walmart? Years ago? That was me!
How you been doing
😂😂😂😂😂😂
@archmage_of_the_aether Oh, thank God you made it out alive! ☺️
electronics next to produce? i call shenanigans.
This dude is delivering content that's better than a lot of people's specials just because it's Tuesday.
Especially the last ones of Rocky 🥊 Gervais, who was only punching down and even Chapelle was dissapointing, he really needs to get off the LGBTQ jokes, coz now it's a pattern and whatever happened to pinching up, like a Katt Williams or in the old days George Carlin, my favorite white stand up comedian!! The best ones never get a special, it's a fake business and lots of the Comedians we know (Kevin Hart, Cedric the Entertainer, Will Smith, Steve Harvey, Chris Tucker and others) and who never did the stand up gigs the real ones do, that's why Katt has outed them all in a few interviews on here, like Shay ... (?) for not writing their own material to them being a group, who tried to black ball Katt ao comedians, weird stories abt P. Diddy, who send Hakeem Jeffries from Empire to Will fit mentoring and he left the house screaming and went into a very dark path afterwards and his career is over. This year Katt's gonna expose them all and I'm taking a front seat!🍿🥤😅
@@Boadicea6 Geezuss dude, I was just bigging up Josh. If you wanna write a dissertation do it on your own comment, not as a reply to mine. 🙄
@@celestialnubian I know I get a bit too exited on here sometimes, doesn't mean you have to be rude about, you don't have to read it! So be a bit nicer and don't respond at all or come with some building criticism!!
Haha!
I love when Josh says “I’ll be vulnerable for a second” and then he followed it with a Denny’s story 😂
I think it's because there's a folk saying that goes "the route to a man's heart is through his stomach".
I think that was the greatest story ever told.
@@xioffb97literally the best joke in this comment section 🏆
I worked at Walmart in 2009 on black Friday. I saw a lady hop over a counter like she was in the Olympics to get a flat screen TV. It was insane!
😂😂😂
@@fatalityrecordsmusicproduc462 smh lol it was insane
Was she an OLYMPIAN
Did yall hear the story about woman chains herself to SNEAKER STORE, 2023 she got arrested
@@deep153 yeah I hear about it
"A hundred plus three hundred minus twelve equals bricks..." Brilliant. Love your stuff Josh.
😂 I laughed again just reading this.
That math ain't mathin!
A lesson you only need to learn ONCE. always ALWAYS check for toilet paper before you sit down
Or squat 4 dear life 😂😂😂😂😂
ALWAYS.
That's why older ladies carry so many tissues in their handbag.
@@annainspain5176 I have a pocket full of tissue wherever I go. It's not just for the toilet, all it takes is one bad sneeze and it's a whole lotta mess. 😂
Or always have a pack of kleenex in your pocket
"I went to the bathroom and then I went to the bathroom" is a weirdly good line
The way his hands was fiddling in the air had me DEAD. Josh got funny ass fingers that just adds to the hilarity.
Omg I’m so glad I’m not the only one who noticed this lmfao. He could def play piano but he sure does have long fingers
See, this is why women like me carry around our packs of tissue paper. Women's bathrooms run out of toilet paper so often you have to carry that emergency supply! 😅
Yep or have soggy cookies😂😂
Yeaaa carry napkins to clean seat and sit down, tissues to wipe
Yep. Taught my 3 older daughters to always carry feminine wipes. You NEVER know when you'll need them.
I carry baby wipes. Buy the small packs so they'll fit in your purse or fold a couple up and put them in a ziplock bag.
I carry wipes, and hoard napkins😂
Just FYI: these days the good deals don't even happen on Black Friday anymore. BF is just the leftover shit that they reprice to make it look lower. The actual deals are 2 weeks before.
Thanks for the tip.
There was only one deal on black friday deal as far as i was aware. Target took $150 off PS5's, shits were gone at 6 am. Technically it was the model Sony said they weren't producing anymore but the disc model's just better anyway.
@@Zevox144 Right, it's always some leftover bs. I think the only deal I missed was on my processor. I could have for sure saved like ~$60 on that setup, but that's also because I didn't need the overclocked Ryzen 5 (the overclocking is pointless on those as they already turbo up to 5ghz)
This is always what it was. A chance for the manufacturers to get rid of stock in prep for the next season. Any sale, that is what it is about, no matter what the timing. If it looks cheaper, it's because they been lying throughout the year and no one notices.! The UK folk looked at Americans doing the BF thing and always thought it was insane. Until that influential culture a few years ago somehow got on a plane a flew over and WE have it now? Why? 😆🤣🤣🤣🤣
True, best deals after xmas.
“You would get your shit rock’d!”
😂😂😂😂😂
I worked at Walmart when I was in college. Got into a fight over a Barbie corvette. Fun times!
Had a rough day, been sick, just got off my second job and was looking for something to watch with my dinner. Almost choked on my food several times but it was worth it. Made my day! The bathroom bit was too funny 🤣 Please don’t ever stop doing comedy!!!!
I feel you on 2nd job….Not easy working two jobs on a daily basis. The stress lowers our immune system and we end up getting sick. Hope u get better soon….Hang in there.
@@angelrivera9227 I really appreciate those kind words and thank you!! ❤️These moments are temporary (hopefully) and health is the most important thing. Stay safe as well!!!
Please don’t choke 😮
So random but i hope you get better ❤ and rememeber to be grateful for the little things and stay hydrated!
wrong move...if you drinking water, drowning would a hazard, also... seriously glad your alright 😅😅😅👍🙏✌️
I'm in stitches on the bus with tears rolling down my face. Some one asked if I was ok. All I could get out is "Josh Johnson... Comedian". Passenger replied with the only chuckle, " Oh I understand". 🤣🤣🤣🤩
That "we've been to the moon" in reference to inconvenient toilet paper rolls😂
He said 2006, 😂😂😂 I remember Tickle Me Elmo in the late 90's.
Cabbage Patch dolls. 80s
Theras so much footage of folks getting trampled in the 80s and 90s I was like youngsta....
Scrooowlled for this comment lol. I remember it in the 90s!
My people!
It's ok, kids young. He didn't have control of when he was born. 😂
Right?!? He said 2006 and I thought, "Bless his heart."
Yeah, the ladies room is a war scene. You need a tampon? She's got your back. We're going into battle together.
I don't even menstruate now and I still make sure I've got pads and tampons, and wet wipes. The Cotonelle flushable ones. Ibs is a cruel mistress, so I never go to the bathroom without the wipes (though I don't flush them in public). Even if I'm about to mess my pants, I check for tp! 😂 Too many memories as a teen (pre-cellphones) having to wait for someone to come in to sheepishly ask for tp. There should be a slider on the front of the door, above toddler reach, that you can slide across if the stall is out of tp or clogged. Just a red or green bar. That's all it needs.
when he mentioned the "oh they're out of toilet paper" "i got you girl" thing i full chested laughed out loud bc we really will just do the claw under the wall or door 😭😭 i've given pads and tampons to the most random ass people and never saw their faces
First rule of going to the bathroom always check if there is toilet paper. 😂
Have you been so pressed you forgot to check? Been there!😢
I ALWAYS wipe the seat down before sitting. Saved me from both gross-wet-ass AND no tp many many times 😂
@@Queenofhearts360Rarely, but yeah. I've found that I'd prefer my OWN bodily gross than to sit on someone ELSE'S though ... so I am wiping that thing down alllll the time 😅 HECK, sometimes I'm even giving it a spit clean 😂
First rule of going to the bathroom if you're in a restaurant, take a few napkins with you... Just in case
For a while there, it felt like it was getting worse every year. First a fight, then a stampede, and didn't people die? The news footage from that era is terrifying...
Black Friday in the 90s was my number one fear because of that footage LOL. That and that one footage of the Michael Jackson concert where women in the audience were pulling out their hair and peeing on themselves. Absolutely scarred for life.
Calling the empty toilet paper roll 'raw'... omg 🤣I had tears from laughing so hard!
this is one of the most relatable sets ever lmao. The bits about walking up the steps, turning the light on, and toilet paper just hit
I’m still confused why Josh and Roy Wood Jr aren’t the co-hosts of the Daily Show yet. What is Comedy Central even doing?
From your "mouth" to The Daily Show's "ears"! I would be addicted!!
Agreed that Josh should co-host. I prefer Jordan Klepper or Kal to join him.
because its a propaganda outfit where you are paid to say what they want you to say
Roy has officially passed on the job.
Dulce Sloan is already there...they could kill it as hosts for the Daily Show as Hold Up shows. Soft spot for Ronny Cheng too or Klepper if it's all sausage.
I was talking to my friend during Black Friday at the mall about this. I literally said "I bet no one here is going to the hospital."
😂
I remember years ago people were frying turkeys waiting in line for Black Friday 😂
😂That is wild! Lmao!
A forgone Era 😅😅😅😅 Kids today don’t even know 😂
No-o-o-o-o-o?!!! 😳🤯😂🤣😁
I am so enjoying you shows. You are an intelligent comedian. Refreshing. No constant cursing. Bet your Mom is proud.
Omg I said The Purge out loud a second before you 😂. I've watched so much of your stuff I must be starting to think like you.
Man I LOVE Josh Johnson. I could listen to him reading the yellow pages. But anyone else out there with IBS giggling at this adorable amateur move? (ALWAYS check the roll first…)
Meeeee 😂😂😂
Yup. I can clench my butthole until I see tp.
I have gone and found only 2 sheets, and who is that monster? 😂
I feel “raw” roll😂 I sware everything be raw some kinda way in a Josh story🤣🤣
I promise you the audio doesn't do this clip justice. There were the most sincere tears from laughing when he was telling that Denny's story! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Good to know! Thanks😂
My brother in law called the restaurant to tell them he needed toliet paper😂😂😂
That's what I was thinking! 😂 Good reason to have your phone with you.
Okay, see that's the next level thinking I wouldn't have even considered! I'd call the person I'm with, perhaps call out, or if desperate enough, and it seemed the coast was clear, I'd penguin waddle to the next stall, but I wouldn't think to call a restaurant to tell them I needed assistance. I don't think about places like that having people you can talk to, or that they wouldn't tell the whole staff and laugh at me.
I lovvvvvvve this!!!!!
Have to remember that...he was smart!!!!
😂😂😂!! Fantastic 😂
What blew my mind about black Friday was people would go be violent over retail literally HOURS after the holiday that's supposed to be focused on being humble and thankful for the things we already have in our lives 😂
Always watch your clips when they pop up. You're hilarious and really know how to tell a story. thanks for sharing your talents Josh!
For real 🙏🏾
Lol! Thank you Josh for helping me get thru Lupus Treatments ✌️
Are you taking cytoxan infusion? I had to do this in 2021. Stay strong lupus warrior
It’s been crazy since I can remember, in the 80s we had the cabbage patch kids “riots”
Tickle me Elmo!!!!!!
1. ALWAYS LOOK FIRST! 🤣 2. Toilet seat covers are the next best thing 3. Just gotta wait for someone to come in the stall next to you lol 4. Call the person you're with- they gotta tell the staff for you lbs
Yep CALL A FRIEND
Our Black Fridays were like the Alabama boat brawl, y'all.
Thinking you're nasty for using the last of the toilet paper sounds like an anxiety thing, I wouldn't feel wired at all. But we all got our hang ups lol.
🤣
Give the bulb a chance to act right!
I refuse to use the last of anything. It drives my husband INSANE. But yes, most definitely Anxiety related!
@@jamiepender6667my husband does that. Leaves coffee cups all over, with ONE SWALLOW at the bottom, growing fuzz.
I can hear "Hermès girl" laughing...😅
The comic this generation needs!!!! And deserves
One of the few comedians I genuinely love watching. Your material always makes me laugh.. and you laughing telling stories makes it so much better ❤
I once told a worker at this restaurant that they were out of toilet paper and he just said "ew." 😂 then proceeded to not restock the tp and do other things instead
No happy story starts with "I was at a Denny's" 😆🤣
I'm Australian and almost none of your content has the relevance here that it has there but I LOVE your brand of comedy and have been binging for hours. Hilarious! And considered. And also not cruel or hurtful. Thank you!!!
Two things I immediately check for in public bathrooms is cleanliness and toilet paper.. it’s a must 😂
So glad I got to attend the set Josh, you did not disappoint
i found you
I worked at JCPenny during college winter break back in the late 80s. Black Friday was the best day because it was super busy and the day flew by.
I think some of the folks who loved live black friday ended up storming the capitol. They missed the thrill and they didn't understand while you might be welcome to fight in a retail store, you get arrested for fighting to get into the capitol.
White Wednesday?
This is great!
Funny!
Oh shoot!! I started laughing so hard at “ended up storming the capitol”! Oh gawd, I couldn’t even see the rest of your comment for a min. My eyes were full on blurry😂😂😂. Thank you. The video is over but I’m not done being amused. I think I’ll go find another Josh video.
It's amazing how he's able to make hilarious comedy from the most random, insignificant everyday events.
I’ve watched hundred of comedians your most definitely one of my faves your story telling ability is amazing love it keep it up!! Homie
Hot tip: I always use a little toilet paper to wipe the seat, partly ‘cause you can’t always see water droplets, and partly so I know there’s TP!
Yesss!!!
I put paper on the seat. People be fucking nasty. And never directly touch the door handles after washing
Bird nest
If you raw dog a public toilet you got bigger issues. Why even reach for paper atp 😂 i dont see How some folks just sit. I could NEVER@@Zevox144
Yessss😂
I’m glad I didn’t break the rules and record while he was performing this set in Arlington when I came to see him last weekend because this was👌🏽 AN EPIC PERFORMANCE 🎭
Lucky.
Oooooo smart choice
The year of tickle me elmo. Never forget
I just said this same thing!!!!! How old are you?! I’m 37 and remember that shit like it was yesterday!
My sister got one for our mama in the nursing home. She enjoyed it ONE DAY. Woke up the next morning, somebody STOLE IT.
@@thisbushnell2012😮omg No!
The lady hollering with laughter at "Help" really gets me. XD
I worked at that Walmart in 2003 for the holidays. Walmart on Black Friday is its own special ring of hell. Fkin Cenla.
Always highlight of my week ❤
Anyone else try texting him when he posted that number?
I think part of what I enjoy about Josh's comedy is the delivery. There's a hesitancy. Almost as if he's sorry to bother us with the information, which then rolls into some outrageous tale like the toilet paper at Denny's.
I keep checking Netflix, waiting for his first full-length special. It's going to be awesome.
Saw a Santa get arrested at 4 am in a Black Friday line at Target once. That wasn’t even the craziest thing that happened in that line. Used to go shopping on BF to buy the most random things that no one was fighting over. It was the only day every year my social anxiety took a break so I could enjoy the chaos. This was at a time I refused to shop on Wednesdays because that’s when most stores offer senior discounts and it gets busy out there. Thankfully there was only one instance of actual violence I witnessed. Didn’t dampen the day because the guy who got punched had it coming.
Having a rough week and that toilet paper story really gave me the laugh I needed.
Black Friday used to have folks headed to the hospital with nothing to show for it 😔
Hilarious, enjoyed after a stressful day ❤❤❤Thank you sir.
bro the toilet paper story happened with me in high school. 🤣🤣 Your delivery is the best bro. Great job. I just died here without beath.
Your delivery is so dope I literally just sat there for the longest story ever and I laughed the whole time
Josh one of the goats 🐐
Immediate tears! “You use to get yo shit rocked” 😂😂😂😂😂😂
You can solve the problem by saying they're almost out of toilet paper. Puts you in the clear
Words from a sage....
This dude never disappoints😂😂😂😂
"raw roll" 😅
I'm coming back and watching this again after a few months, and just got the wildest sense memory of where I was and what I was doing the first time I listened. That's a sign of a good show right there lol
Today, I needed all of those laughs!😆😆😂🤣🤣
Idk how this dude doesn’t have 1,000,000 subscribers. He is a gem.
Impressive, you are killing it young man.
So damn funny. Josh you are pure gold!
Not only is he superbly talented but he is easy on the eyes. Youthful and did you notice how beautiful his hands are?
This is unprecedented! I can honestly rely on a weekly brand-new, topical special from you and it warms my heart. I believe your specials have surpassed FDR's "fireside chats" in their iconic legendary status, and ability to soothe a nation through troubled times
YES! Better than Atenolol.
Camera guy broke laughing at 13:04 😂
How is this dude funny every week consistently fresh material. Legit King 👑
If i walk IN the bathroom and SEE no toilet paper, im turning around. I cant possibly be caught slippin like that 😂
Don’t get caught lackin’ w no tp!!!!🧻
Wow. The fact that I just used a toilet paper emoji is wild. Toilet paper.
🙌🏾🙌🏾 Right!
This is comedic gold right here!😂😂😂😂
Literally every second was hilarious.
"but yeah, ive been through a lot" lmfao
Love this set, so relatable! From me, Nicole Marie Zanders.
I am so happy tonight that my father's procedures went ok. He will be 84 on December 21st.
I just made stir fry bbq pineapple chicken with red, green and yellow bell peppers from our garden and onions and white rice, steamed green beans and brussel sprouts with a green salad with chopped cheddar cheese and ham for my Mom and Dad.
Dad just had a colonoscopy and endoscopy this morning and I had to cook non fiber food for the past 2 days and the 3rd day all liquids while Mom wanted regular food, roasted potatoes with skin, baked chicken and for breakfast; bacon, scrambled eggs ( Dad had boiled eggs) buttery grits ( Dad could eat them) and about 6 slices of white toast instead of wheat, cottage cheese, pineapple slices, fruit cottail and bacon.❤ Never married. No children. Just taking care of my parents until I die.
Josh, your topics are REAL!!! Outstanding delivery. 🤣🤣🤩
Thank you for always making us laugh!! 🙏❤🙏
Excellent, as always. I've now consumed every video you have posted. It's been great watching you go from strength to strength. I don't understand why you don't have 500k followers already. Or a million. Maybe the counter's not working properly. Try kicking it. 2024's going to be your year, and you really deserve it. And solid gold shoes. And a hat made of caviar, or whatever it is that superstars wear!
Love these videos! Insanely impressive how much standup you out out there. Hope to see you live soon!
This is A- tier material and delivery my guy, cant wait to see you live!
A+tier*
💯🔥👏Thanks for the laughs🤗👏💛
8:29 its the sitting on the toilet Bare Assed for me 😂😂😢
The toilet paper situation is literally the first thing I look at when I open a bathroom stall. I never just go in unprepared 😂
I know you likely won't see this, but you've been my favorite comedian for years now and I'm so excited because my mom got me tickets to see you on Friday for my birthday. So, I'd like to thank you in advance for making my birthday awesome.
I cannot wait to see your stand up live!
😂 remeber when people had thanksgiving dinner on the blackfriday line? Scary times 😂😂😂😂
Yes i do.😮 such a weird sight on the news
Dope... ArtLiFe always i2f the artist... one love... blessings
Such enjoyable content throughout this whole video. An delicious treat full of non-stop laughter.Being teleported from my long day here in ILLINOIS into each secene of where your stories took place was so therapeutic. Allowing me to relax. Releasing some stress while being filled with Joy 😹
Your ability in telling stories is so natural as breathing. What aprecious gift Josh you have 🎁 The ability to capture a person's attention so easily. Then bring them on an journey with you in the story. While painting imagery with your words detailed with animation & effects. Never boring your audience mind you. Transporting us into the space and time of the event your describing in the stories Josh is remarkable❤Don't ever stop nurturing that precious gift of your special storytelling abilities honey.
Wow such capability of capturing people heart's deeply. Just envisioning now getting excited for you of all the possibilities how one could use that gift Josh Johnson you have in positive healthy ways. Making such an profound impact on this Earth. Dreaming about you Josh Johnson occupying an lecture hall setting imparting wisdom & inspiring millions. Using your story telling abilities to touch people's heart's and change their lives for the better. I'm speaking this into your life ❤️ Declaring and declaring Josh Johnson will be a ray of light to many in this generation. Making history transforming lives for the better. In return making this world a better place to live ❣️ Claiming it is happening. You Josh Johnson were born for such a time🎉 Paraphrasing from The book of Esther.
The Ride down Black Friday memory lane from watching a short piece of your set was eye opening how people in society can quickly become unhinged turning into savages. Very edifying yet so refreshingly full of truth.
I too needed these laughs Thx...💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
Always a laugh 😂 Josh is great
A few years ago, I went to Game Stop on Black Friday for a Nintendo Switch. It was the second year that the system had been out, and online shopping was available, so the experience was honestly so pleasant and refreshing. It was just so stress-free that I couldn't believe it, as a veteran of the crazy days.
wait you changing up the time on us? i was caught off guard. lol good thing i always have my side TH-cam window open at work
Thanks!
You are an absolutely brilliant comedian
I pray to the lucky stars you make it big
You are an absolute rockstar
So glad I found you
I tell my Ppl bout you when they’ll listen lolz
Trying to get ppl to click a link of someone they don’t know takes bribery 😂😂