I once went on a date with a girl and I was really nervous. I wanted the date to go well but ended up acting weird. She asked:"Are you nervous?" I answered:"Yes, sorry for being weird." Then she replied:" Haha me too. Let's be weird together." We ended up being together till this day. Love is strange.
This is me AF! I’ve lived my life WAY too long giving AF about what everyone thinks. Detaching has helped me so damn much. My life feels way less stressful these days because I don’t give AF as much as I used to. For me, life is short and precious. I wanna use my limited time living my life and not being boxed in by people’s fawking perceptions based on their own view of life. Hell, many folk ain’t even happy with their own lives, so why TF would I give that energy my attention!?
love this mindset! and totally agree that often the people that give others the most shit are usually the ones who are unhappiest with their own lives, so why should we even entertain their opinions in the first place? 😁☺️
But how do you not give af? I take things personally, and sometimes I just think so much despite knowing that the other person has her own life and doesn’t give a shit abt me! Like ppl say ki they are the way they are! And they really are my good friends but they tell me how I myself make plans with them which I shouldn’t do! She told me that I should act cool and not show ppl that I care.. she also told me to not communicate things and rather just avoid it.. and it’s bad on my side to go and talk to ppl let them know what made me feel bad and clear out things.. I mean why ppl are like we are the way we are but will show you where you lack!
All my life I used to think that idc but I care so much I have major fomo I care what they think I care what they talk about when I am not around bcz ik ppl talk abt u whenev u r not around.. How do I stop taking things personally and how do I stop thinking and giving so much fuck!!!!!
and I always think that wow they are so secure they don’t care they don’t think and wow etc etc.. but then me who works in office and thinks about things throughout the day! What they are thinking and do they really love me! God idk why do I feel the way I feel
I started behaving this way and people started hating me for it. They want us to be attached so they can better control manipulate us emotional or otherwise.
@@ave_smirnova and then you starst to realise every single moment when they say things that are supposed to make you feel ashamed for going your own way, instead of drinking with them haha
OMG thanks for the reminder, I was in job interview last week and I felt that I really want this job and guess what? I failed on that interview lol. Despite of being sad, I just keep applying on jobs and I just believe that I will get the job that I desire but not really feel concerned about not gonna get one. This week I got the job I just applied after the failed interview. It's true that detaching is really that powerful!
This should have more views! I am in the process of healthy detachment - not becoming jaded, but not freaking out over every little thing. “Attract don’t chase” is really useful for a lot of situations
I've come to realize that in order to maintain peace in my life, I have to intentionally decide where my energy goes. It's made a huge difference! What a relatable piece.
I'm currently having breakthroughs with detachment as well. Hearing "focus on the inputs and the outputs take care of themselves" changed my life, because we _can't_ control every single outcome, but we _can_ control our actions. Like you say, it's this paradoxical seeming thing where, by caring less we actually get better results. Wu Wei.
super glad to hear that you are! and i absolutely love that quote, thanks for sharing :) similar to focusing on action orientated goals > outcome oriented goals :)
In the last years I could observe the same in my life, everytime I stop worrying about something it comes to me easily, I wish everyone here have a nice life, full of joys with an abundant life too!
The people who care a lot and who does the right thing ALWAYS-get screwed in the end. Not only will you get screwed but you’ll probably never get what you want. Only the people who don’t care, who do the wrong things, and who don’t deserve things will get the things you have. I’m learning that now.
I was thinking the exact same thing! I've experienced and witnessed many cases where the people who passionately desire a certain outcome are always painfully rejected and the people who either don't care or do not even value/desire it are often the ones who get the blessings.
I learned long ago detachment is actually a calmer way to live and like you say it prevents us from self sabotage. Plus it allows the universe to work more in our favor.
People you know have a certain perception about you. They classify you in their own way . If you challenge that perception, they will indeed resent you
I don't understand why people care so much. I don't have set perceptions about others. I just mind my own business. I take the negative with the positive. We are all complicated anyhow.
@CareBlair222 because thinking low of you makes them feel better about themselves. They need validation and if you pay them no attention they hate you because attention is their drug of distraction
Thank you for this! I realized recently how obsessed I’ve been over the outcomes and control of things. Im ready to trust and let things go and let the Universe work its magic ✨
I went to Hawaii to say goodbye to my dying grandparent. I also got to reflect/relax while I was there from burned out life, corporate America, infertility, dealing with rude and inept family members…. Such an odd thing to lie in the water (at the beach) in paradise, going through grief while letting go of everything. I came back in my “I truly DGAF” era and it’s given me this peace I’ve never experienced.
detachment for me started when i was able to delete all my social media. for like 8 months. lost friends and clients that way. after 8 months, it was more like '' ehh, so that's not that bad ! '' I am the type of extroverted high energy self sabotage FOMO guy and this was pivoting moment for me because now, just recently , i also quit my job that i dread ( felt stuck there ) and now i'm like ,,,ehhhh it ain't so bad! LOLL
Let me tell u before u waste ur 12 min?! There was nothing special in this and basic generic advice If u r thinking you’ll get something unique? NO Don’t watch and waste your precious TIME
@@mxmeinjknm2021 Of course, every self help stuff is 'generic knowledge' but we need to watch it again and again to remind ourselves cause let's be honest, we all know what we need to do to make things better but fail to put it into action. Consistency will make us better and watching these videos gives me motivation to be consistent even in days I feel lazy, while having that 'I already know everything' mindset will only make you stuck
This was so well presented, because in other videos people just talk about detachment as a concept, and here you actually applied detachment in a couple different spheres in life and gave concrete examples, which is so helpful for us to put things into real life perspective. The chapter for detachment with youtube was most interesting for me for sure. Thank you, Tika! :)
I think it's a matter of self worth, if we place our self worth in the future, after we've achieved the success, then we stop being present and don't enjoy the process anymore, and if we're not enjoying the process well.. that's the law of attraction reflecting our attitude to us in our outcomes.
I think it's very important to not care about other ppl, even those less fortunate. My life became better when I switched off and just did my own thing.
Me to. Can I recommend "Candide" by Voltaire, the great philosopher. Its a whimsical amusing story that concludes by saying, you should just tend to your own garden.
This video is such a good wake up call to be more detached. I recently just started my youtube journey and have been obsessing over the youtube analytics.
I’ve been detaching from things that used to rule my life such as my job stress or relationships and I am much more in control of how things impact my mood and my life. I have actually started to put a calendar invite to myself to think about something that is bothering me or distracting me from my purpose. This has helped me focus more on my tasks and when things creep into my mind I can tell myself, ‘you have an appointment for that, now get back to this.’ I respond now rather than react and I have become a better leader in my team at work because I am not swayed by a panicked customer that needs something ‘right now, ASAP’ and calm down my technician to work the issue not the customer’s emotions. Detachment is a great skill to develop.
Yeah I feel you. I went from being super authentic on my social channels to being someone I didn’t even recognize alll because I had the pressure from the pandemic to make money and live off of my content. I was put in this survival mode that didn’t breed inspiration. I burned out and hated what I was doing, all for it to come crashing down along with my old identity. Now I’m learning from this a building from a place of knowing my mistakes and keeping my endeavors light and fun
I watched ur video at WORK. Now I'm home, leaving this comment: THANK U FOR THIS LIFE CHANGING ADVICE! You just solved a problem that had been bugging me for years!!!!
I’ve been through a lot of shit. My family hated me, my boss fired me for a silly reason. I need a new work for my university. I’m scared and really stressed out and I always think about and what it’s doing with my life. I wish, I haven’t think about that and everything comes easily my way
i dont think this video could have came at a better time, while I practice the law of detachment often, its always nice to have a refresher on it once in a while. coming across your video, ive noticed a few things to admire about your style of video: your constant eye contact, the way you talk is very soothing, reassuring, and confident, but the biggest thing i admired was your REALISTIC advice. i love how you didnt try to "demonize" (for lack of a better term) being attached, but more showed, with REALISTIC examples, why the law of detachment works and why you should apply it to life (especially for someone with recently diagnosed anxiety), tika, you've earned a new sub! thank you
My English is not that good but I just wanted to say :This video come out of no where when I was thinking about something and I cared about it too much, I felt that this is a sign for me and this is can't be rendom, you did such a great job in this video I learned alot, this is my first time watching you and I am really happy that I know your channel now ❤
I decided to watch your video again because I feel even MORE strong now about leaning into not giving AF! I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder in 2018, and anxiety is a HUGE issue in my life. While I still deal with it at times, I have noticed that adopting more of an IDGAF attitude has helped me be less anxious. Like I'm just not as anxious as I usually am. I'm just detaching from a lot of shxt and only worrying about what really matters. Thanks again for this video!
This was amazing and easy to digest. Currently, as I’m navigating my recent break up and planned my whole future around this one individual🙏🏾 Learning to detach from those thoughts as it’s easier said then done, is valuable.
I listen to this video everyday because I care so much what people think and I’m so easily influenced. Your video really gives me hopes to continue my fitness journey and post things that I truly like.
I've been thinking about the whole "detachment from the outcome" thing quite a bit myself, so this video appeared to me at just the right time! I think there have been some moments in my life where I've subconsciously detached and things started to work out well for me (like, in a job interview or just trying to be just good at my job or even trying to start a conversation with a stranger hoping to get a nice interaction and that they wont think that I'm some creep lol). But I didn't know how to replicate that consistently... and either, yes I would obsess/fixate over an outcome or take the extreme opposite even be apathetic in an attempt to "detach". What I'm trying to do these days more than ever is to try and live presently and enjoy the process, because that seems to be the key to detaching. I think me practising meditation and journaling is going some way towards that. Detaching is not easy and there will be some bumps in the road for sure. When things go well, it's quite easy to then raise your hopes and expect things to always go well the next time round. Or when things don't go well, one blames the universe lol Just my own thoughts.
Example 1 is literally what I am going through right now😭 just got out of a long term relationship where i saw reality for what i wanted it to be, and not for what it was😢
I didn't even finish and halved the video but I realized a lot of things about myself and things that I'm doing wrong. Thanks so much for this. This video about detachment is the video that really helps me about detachment. It's easy to understand. Very good timing. I really need this. Thanks again. Sending love from the Philippines ❤❤❤❤❤
There is a famous verse in the Bhagavad Gita which says "Karm karo, fal ki chinta mat karo" which means Do your duty without thinking about results. What the statement means is that one should concentrate on doing his duty without being concerned about the outcome.
As a 44 year old dude who "lived it up" during my youth (was in a band, dated a bunch of hipster girls, partied, etc), you will eventually have to "let go" of any cool station in life you achieve. Either through just bad luck or the aging process. So yeah...don't freak out. Good times come and go. So do people.
Thank for sharing this, I really needed everything mentioned here Everything gets worse when I start trying to get more and more control over smth and it is just simple rule of life that we are not in control over processes Really appreciate everything, thank you ❤
TH-cam has been reading my mind recently for sure. I've thought today of letting go and here we are, the Internets send me this video. I will integrate these words of wisdom into my life. Thanks 🎉
im a 36 y/o beginner at this, but its already helped me out so much. Its a way to fight against the freeze response! How ive longed for this. like.. I finally am able to pick up, flirt. I could finally stop obsessing over my ex. Gyms been goin great by itself, but i already stopped caring about the look in that department. Small wins!
I love this! I just started a channel less than a week ago and I need to channel more of this. Only having 12 subscribers - I already feel like I lost when all I want to do is make content I enjoy watching myself. I need to not care about acceptance and know as long as I'm happy that's all that matter
I totally relate to this. Well said, I love the concept of the law of detachment! It’s crazy how much these perspective changes can change your life for the better.
absolutely! some of the biggest life changes I've had are from just one simple thing i heard on a podcast/YT vid. super glad you could relate to this video! 😊
Thank you!!!❤ I’m actually crying haha, THIS is the concept I’ve been searching for! I love quotes and theories, short but something I can remember well, and this is it! 😅I try to remember Mel Robbin’s “Let them theory “, which I love, but this captures it in more depth. I actually remember from when I was younger that the time I was tired of dieting and just “gave up”, but still doing my best, that’s when I lost weight, so this reminded me of that. Currently trying to care less about my body and use the clothes I have but feel to ashamed to wear, people wear weirder things than that, I can manage! 😅 I’ve heard of this theory before but since english isn’t my first language (from Norway, so we’ll be closer I hear!) - I thought the word detachment meant something like being overly dependent on other people, like relationship stuff, which I’m the opposite of so I never looked it up. It’s just those words when you like ah I know this and it’s not for me, to realize that it’s potentially life-changing😮 Going out for a walk now in silence to hear myself think, this is my new path to figure out what could do for me! Best of luck staying in Sweden 🎉
I can’t do it, no matter how hard I try NOT to care, no matter what I tell myself, I can’t stop caring about others. People can call me a nice guy, idgaf, I will always be true to myself and if this is the path I’m going down then so be it.
Have you ever tried to do some self reflecting and look inward, and ask yourself big questions like what it is that YOU want out of life? That's where you need to start if you have personal issues with stuff like this. I also HIGHLY RECOMMEND the book: The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson. As cliche as it sounds, I'd at least try a sample if you're able to.
Quality video. Have saved it in my Revisits playlist and will keep coming back to it for encouragement and as a reminder to myself to lower my expectations. Thanks for creating it, Tika!
I so relate. I do best when I let go and go with the flow while doing what I intend to do. I like to be flexible. Many many times when I stopped giving a fuck, things worked out themselves in another way. I dont think I can continuously focus on what I want or affirming it every chance i get, I like to trust and let go and enjoy my life in peace.
This is so helpful for me, I almost watched all your videos. All of these are so relatable and really helped me to track my life lately. I'm going to follow your points here to have a better understanding of life. Thank you, please keep uploading more of such videos.❤
this si true ive been struggling with porn addiction and i recently stopped caring about relapse and ironically now im making improvments.and completing goals ive never done before. just flowing with life without eexpectations is freedom.
Really great video. I’m brand new to TH-cam and it’s nice to hear your perspective on how it was important to enjoy what you were doing. I’ve been following the numbers to the point where it stresses me out and I only have 79 subscribers right now. So dumb honestly. 😊
You can't control your thoughts or feelings. You will be attached whether you like it or not. It's how you react that matters. But that doesn't mean the feelings or the thoughts are in your control, nor that they will go away.
I think you need to be clear. The fact that you cared about the favorable outcome of your new attitude means you actually cared. In reality you just reprioritized and reorganized what is important versus what is less important . You just got older and deeper into adulthood .
Coming from someone who used to be indifferent to academic results to the point where I would not even prepare, those were the times I achieved the highest grades. But then it got to a point where I started to feel stupid and ended up caring too much and the rest is history. So yeah, this is true
Earl Nightengale once said, "Put a wooden beam on the ground and walk on it, from one end to the other. No problem, right? It's easy. Now put the beam up between the tops of two buildings that are nine stories high. Walk along the beam now. It's a completely different experience, isn't it? You'll be so frightened that you'll probably fall. What's the difference between the beam on the ground and the one that's nine stories up? The fear of failure." I think part of detachment is removing that fear.
I like to handle stressful situations with having ice in my veins, which is a very similar concept as detachment. It works well with tough interviews, presentations or other stressful situations.
When you talk about that, you realize actually everything you surviving by yourself, you don’t need that person to do that anymore Then you start to detach that sound like me back then I just realized that everything is done by myself. I don’t have anybody to come and help me and I’m not really sure that this relationship is gonna be that good future either.
Detachment is so difficult because many of us have been programmed to create goals and work towards the outcome of those goals. I do agree with you that detachment can be a very powerful tool if used correctly. However, there is a time for attachment - if you want to sleep in a a bed with clean sheets then it will probably help to visualise yourself later that night sleeping in a clean bed. That will motivate you to go through the motions from stripping the sheets to finishing making the bed with clean sheets.
This is a great video! Keep doing what you're doing it's good quality content! I have trained myself from a young age to live life in a detached way and honestly when i say to people i love people but i don't get attached a lot don't understand and I also found it difficult to put in words what i mean which i feel you've done cohesively. Living life in a detached manner really makes you feel free and at peace. It's wonderful and though its also something you have to keep consistent like physical activity it is so worth it in the end cause you live your life feeling everything that will happen eventually comes to you in ways even better than you have expected or possibly thought
i watched it damn right time. My all situations are going down mentally these days. And i know i'm caring too much all things in my life and bam this video comes out ❤ sometimes youtube is a god's hand😂
Thank you for this clip actually I have recently starting to do this and for me it was surrendering to the universe and trusting the process because its kind of same thing law of detachment. Its about not taking life too seriously but do what you can, trust the process and be consistent
Thank you for sharing this. I'm trying to find my niche here on TH-cam as well and it has definitely been hard to balance the goals I have set for myself and the mindset of taking things as they come. Can't wait until I find where my content fits in while just enjoying the creative process.
aw that's so great to hear! 😭 i take quite a bit of time to script out things and I'm always revising/rewriting bc I'm paranoid it won't make sense to anyone else but me 😂😅
@@TikaGhafar~ Never feel that way, feel free to express it your own way, others will get perfectly. Nevertheless, you were awesome in getting across. Lots of smiles to you...😊
Very interesting video, and i can confirm from personal experience that everything you say is actually how it works. At least for me. Greetings from.... SWEDEN 🇸🇪😂 no joke
There is no such thing as caring too much. There is such a thing as being unable to keep emotions from impacting behavior. There is such a thing as a lack of accountability that keeps people from getting out of their own way and realizing that bear fault for 99% of our problems. You didn’t care too much. You actually cared to little to prepare yourself to succeed.
While the sentiment of relinquishing concern may seem liberating, the assertion that life fundamentally improves by disregarding all care is dubious. Embracing apathy risks stagnation and deprives life of its depth and richness. True fulfillment often arises from meaningful engagement and purposeful investment, not from detachment.
“Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to loose” - Master Yoda
Wow that is remarkably deep
Lol😂
Love this quote ❤
Powerful.
people die and they still are not able to decode this . its not that easy
I once went on a date with a girl and I was really nervous. I wanted the date to go well but ended up acting weird. She asked:"Are you nervous?" I answered:"Yes, sorry for being weird." Then she replied:" Haha me too. Let's be weird together." We ended up being together till this day. Love is strange.
that's so cute ngl
she's cute❤
Focus on what lies within your control, and accept what does not
What if I feel like everything is in my control and hence wanting to control everything ?
Can you control the weather? Food prices? Who wins the Super Bowl? etc. No. Everything is not under your control. That's what you have to realize.
This is me AF! I’ve lived my life WAY too long giving AF about what everyone thinks. Detaching has helped me so damn much. My life feels way less stressful these days because I don’t give AF as much as I used to. For me, life is short and precious. I wanna use my limited time living my life and not being boxed in by people’s fawking perceptions based on their own view of life. Hell, many folk ain’t even happy with their own lives, so why TF would I give that energy my attention!?
love this mindset! and totally agree that often the people that give others the most shit are usually the ones who are unhappiest with their own lives, so why should we even entertain their opinions in the first place? 😁☺️
But how do you not give af?
I take things personally, and sometimes I just think so much despite knowing that the other person has her own life and doesn’t give a shit abt me!
Like ppl say ki they are the way they are!
And they really are my good friends but they tell me how I myself make plans with them which I shouldn’t do!
She told me that I should act cool and not show ppl that I care..
she also told me to not communicate things and rather just avoid it.. and it’s bad on my side to go and talk to ppl let them know what made me feel bad and clear out things..
I mean why ppl are like we are the way we are but will show you where you lack!
All my life I used to think that idc but I care so much I have major fomo
I care what they think I care what they talk about when I am not around bcz ik ppl talk abt u whenev u r not around..
How do I stop taking things personally and how do I stop thinking and giving so much fuck!!!!!
and I always think that wow they are so secure they don’t care they don’t think and wow etc etc.. but then me who works in office and thinks about things throughout the day! What they are thinking and do they really love me!
God idk why do I feel the way I feel
@@dancingbird1330 Maby start with question for yourself where does it come from That you care so much?
I started behaving this way and people started hating me for it. They want us to be attached so they can better control manipulate us emotional or otherwise.
fucking true
@@ave_smirnova and then you starst to realise every single moment when they say things that are supposed to make you feel ashamed for going your own way, instead of drinking with them haha
Isn't it manipulation if we behave certain way to make people like us, like not giving them the chance to have all kinds of different attitudes?
I got told Im not a team player. Well, maybe Im not, so thats that.
I agree. I act like I don't give a fuck at school and the dirty looks are galore. But I don't give a fuck 😅😅😅😅 people want you in a codependent state.
As the Buddha would say, attachment leads to suffering
Please don’t ever delete this video, it opened my eyes and I will watch it every time I forget your advice.
Same here
You can download it and save it in video 😂😂😂 lol
ahh that's such high praise 😭 glad you found the video useful and hope it helps you in your life 💕✨
@@TikaGhafar you didnt say thnx to me (:
@@PashaSolutions because she's detached
At 3:00, "Detachment is being able to accept whatever happens--good or bad--for what it is. And trusting that you'll be okay, no matter the outcome."
So that's why loading bars load faster when you don't look at them 🧐
Underrated comment lol
😂
Point.
😂
????
OMG thanks for the reminder, I was in job interview last week and I felt that I really want this job and guess what? I failed on that interview lol. Despite of being sad, I just keep applying on jobs and I just believe that I will get the job that I desire but not really feel concerned about not gonna get one. This week I got the job I just applied after the failed interview. It's true that detaching is really that powerful!
This should have more views! I am in the process of healthy detachment - not becoming jaded, but not freaking out over every little thing. “Attract don’t chase” is really useful for a lot of situations
"attract don't chase" is absolutely something I've been trying to embody this past year. thanks for the reminder!
❤
I've come to realize that in order to maintain peace in my life, I have to intentionally decide where my energy goes. It's made a huge difference! What a relatable piece.
Key to life. Stop giving your power away
Just let life happen & don't let anyone manipulate you! Stand in your power! Ladies, Know your worth!
This is correct!!!!
I'm currently having breakthroughs with detachment as well. Hearing "focus on the inputs and the outputs take care of themselves" changed my life, because we _can't_ control every single outcome, but we _can_ control our actions. Like you say, it's this paradoxical seeming thing where, by caring less we actually get better results. Wu Wei.
super glad to hear that you are! and i absolutely love that quote, thanks for sharing :) similar to focusing on action orientated goals > outcome oriented goals :)
In the last years I could observe the same in my life, everytime I stop worrying about something it comes to me easily, I wish everyone here have a nice life, full of joys with an abundant life too!
Don’t give shit about outcome. Sooo truee ✨✨
The people who care a lot and who does the right thing ALWAYS-get screwed in the end. Not only will you get screwed but you’ll probably never get what you want.
Only the people who don’t care, who do the wrong things, and who don’t deserve things will get the things you have.
I’m learning that now.
I was thinking the exact same thing! I've experienced and witnessed many cases where the people who passionately desire a certain outcome are always painfully rejected and the people who either don't care or do not even value/desire it are often the ones who get the blessings.
@@Sasha-zl1xr I’ve learned that’s how life works.
I learned long ago detachment is actually a calmer way to live and like you say it prevents us from self sabotage. Plus it allows the universe to work more in our favor.
People you know have a certain perception about you. They classify you in their own way . If you challenge that perception, they will indeed resent you
I don't understand why people care so much. I don't have set perceptions about others. I just mind my own business. I take the negative with the positive. We are all complicated anyhow.
@CareBlair222 because thinking low of you makes them feel better about themselves. They need validation and if you pay them no attention they hate you because attention is their drug of distraction
This is so true! Things start going wrong when I really want something
Same !!!!
Same
Yes!
Thank you for this! I realized recently how obsessed I’ve been over the outcomes and control of things. Im ready to trust and let things go and let the Universe work its magic ✨
I went to Hawaii to say goodbye to my dying grandparent. I also got to reflect/relax while I was there from burned out life, corporate America, infertility, dealing with rude and inept family members…. Such an odd thing to lie in the water (at the beach) in paradise, going through grief while letting go of everything. I came back in my “I truly DGAF” era and it’s given me this peace I’ve never experienced.
detachment for me started when i was able to delete all my social media. for like 8 months. lost friends and clients that way. after 8 months, it was more like '' ehh, so that's not that bad ! '' I am the type of extroverted high energy self sabotage FOMO guy and this was pivoting moment for me because now, just recently , i also quit my job that i dread ( felt stuck there ) and now i'm like ,,,ehhhh it ain't so bad! LOLL
Finding the 'money's hidden magic' ebook should be your top priority, even if it's the last thing you do in life
shut up scammer
I highly recommend 😁
Let me tell u before u waste ur 12 min?!
There was nothing special in this and basic generic advice
If u r thinking you’ll get something unique? NO
Don’t watch and waste your precious TIME
@@mxmeinjknm2021 Of course, every self help stuff is 'generic knowledge' but we need to watch it again and again to remind ourselves cause let's be honest, we all know what we need to do to make things better but fail
to put it into action. Consistency will make us better and watching these videos gives me motivation to be consistent even in days I feel lazy, while having that 'I already know everything' mindset will only make you stuck
I don't give respect by default, I offer courtesy to those i meet but respect must be earned.
This is so true! Detachment really helps to get your desire faster
This was so well presented, because in other videos people just talk about detachment as a concept, and here you actually applied detachment in a couple different spheres in life and gave concrete examples, which is so helpful for us to put things into real life perspective. The chapter for detachment with youtube was most interesting for me for sure. Thank you, Tika! :)
The entire premise of Curb Your Enthusiasm is based on this principle and its great!!!!
Your tone & vocal reflection oozes confidence. Absolutely love the advice! GL on your journey
I think it's a matter of self worth, if we place our self worth in the future, after we've achieved the success, then we stop being present and don't enjoy the process anymore, and if we're not enjoying the process well.. that's the law of attraction reflecting our attitude to us in our outcomes.
I think it's very important to not care about other ppl, even those less fortunate. My life became better when I switched off and just did my own thing.
Me to. Can I recommend "Candide" by Voltaire, the great philosopher. Its a whimsical amusing story that concludes by saying, you should just tend to your own garden.
I care about others. I just don't allow their suffering to affect me like I used too. Being kind is important.
This video is such a good wake up call to be more detached. I recently just started my youtube journey and have been obsessing over the youtube analytics.
I’ve been detaching from things that used to rule my life such as my job stress or relationships and I am much more in control of how things impact my mood and my life. I have actually started to put a calendar invite to myself to think about something that is bothering me or distracting me from my purpose. This has helped me focus more on my tasks and when things creep into my mind I can tell myself, ‘you have an appointment for that, now get back to this.’ I respond now rather than react and I have become a better leader in my team at work because I am not swayed by a panicked customer that needs something ‘right now, ASAP’ and calm down my technician to work the issue not the customer’s emotions. Detachment is a great skill to develop.
It's like the saying of playing golf, if you take is too lightly you won't do well, but if you take it to seriously it'll break you heart.
Yeah I feel you. I went from being super authentic on my social channels to being someone I didn’t even recognize alll because I had the pressure from the pandemic to make money and live off of my content. I was put in this survival mode that didn’t breed inspiration. I burned out and hated what I was doing, all for it to come crashing down along with my old identity. Now I’m learning from this a building from a place of knowing my mistakes and keeping my endeavors light and fun
I watched ur video at WORK. Now I'm home, leaving this comment: THANK U FOR THIS LIFE CHANGING ADVICE! You just solved a problem that had been bugging me for years!!!!
I am at work listening to this lol
I’ve been through a lot of shit. My family hated me, my boss fired me for a silly reason. I need a new work for my university. I’m scared and really stressed out and I always think about and what it’s doing with my life. I wish, I haven’t think about that and everything comes easily my way
You'll find another job... I dunno what happened w your family but really, and most of the time, people aren't always having your back.
@@pantherman8719 human race r maggots keep away as much a spossible
i dont think this video could have came at a better time, while I practice the law of detachment often, its always nice to have a refresher on it once in a while. coming across your video, ive noticed a few things to admire about your style of video: your constant eye contact, the way you talk is very soothing, reassuring, and confident, but the biggest thing i admired was your REALISTIC advice. i love how you didnt try to "demonize" (for lack of a better term) being attached, but more showed, with REALISTIC examples, why the law of detachment works and why you should apply it to life (especially for someone with recently diagnosed anxiety), tika, you've earned a new sub! thank you
My English is not that good but I just wanted to say :This video come out of no where when I was thinking about something and I cared about it too much, I felt that this is a sign for me and this is can't be rendom, you did such a great job in this video I learned alot, this is my first time watching you and I am really happy that I know your channel now ❤
Your English is really good
I decided to watch your video again because I feel even MORE strong now about leaning into not giving AF! I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder in 2018, and anxiety is a HUGE issue in my life. While I still deal with it at times, I have noticed that adopting more of an IDGAF attitude has helped me be less anxious. Like I'm just not as anxious as I usually am. I'm just detaching from a lot of shxt and only worrying about what really matters. Thanks again for this video!
This was amazing and easy to digest. Currently, as I’m navigating my recent break up and planned my whole future around this one individual🙏🏾
Learning to detach from those thoughts as it’s easier said then done, is valuable.
I listen to this video everyday because I care so much what people think and I’m so easily influenced. Your video really gives me hopes to continue my fitness journey and post things that I truly like.
I've been thinking about the whole "detachment from the outcome" thing quite a bit myself, so this video appeared to me at just the right time! I think there have been some moments in my life where I've subconsciously detached and things started to work out well for me (like, in a job interview or just trying to be just good at my job or even trying to start a conversation with a stranger hoping to get a nice interaction and that they wont think that I'm some creep lol). But I didn't know how to replicate that consistently... and either, yes I would obsess/fixate over an outcome or take the extreme opposite even be apathetic in an attempt to "detach".
What I'm trying to do these days more than ever is to try and live presently and enjoy the process, because that seems to be the key to detaching. I think me practising meditation and journaling is going some way towards that.
Detaching is not easy and there will be some bumps in the road for sure. When things go well, it's quite easy to then raise your hopes and expect things to always go well the next time round. Or when things don't go well, one blames the universe lol
Just my own thoughts.
Example 1 is literally what I am going through right now😭 just got out of a long term relationship where i saw reality for what i wanted it to be, and not for what it was😢
Very helpful and inspiring message. Thank you. 😊
Makes sense, Thank you. It is the law of attraction that unfolds through practicing letting go of unhealthy desires.
I didn't even finish and halved the video but I realized a lot of things about myself and things that I'm doing wrong. Thanks so much for this. This video about detachment is the video that really helps me about detachment. It's easy to understand. Very good timing. I really need this. Thanks again. Sending love from the Philippines ❤❤❤❤❤
Very very very very very and a hundred times more relatable.
"very" what? did you forget to type a word?
There is a famous verse in the Bhagavad Gita which says "Karm karo, fal ki chinta mat karo" which means Do your duty without thinking about results. What the statement means is that one should concentrate on doing his duty without being concerned about the outcome.
As a 44 year old dude who "lived it up" during my youth (was in a band, dated a bunch of hipster girls, partied, etc), you will eventually have to "let go" of any cool station in life you achieve. Either through just bad luck or the aging process. So yeah...don't freak out. Good times come and go. So do people.
I never leave comments but this was good mature advice from such a young lady.
Thank for sharing this, I really needed everything mentioned here
Everything gets worse when I start trying to get more and more control over smth and it is just simple rule of life that we are not in control over processes
Really appreciate everything, thank you ❤
TH-cam has been reading my mind recently for sure. I've thought today of letting go and here we are, the Internets send me this video.
I will integrate these words of wisdom into my life. Thanks 🎉
The only job interviews I've cracked till now are the ones where I had zero expectations of the outcome or I was not desperate to crack them
Bahgwat geeta quote
Focus on the process not on the result. That's the key of greatness
im a 36 y/o beginner at this, but its already helped me out so much.
Its a way to fight against the freeze response! How ive longed for this.
like.. I finally am able to pick up, flirt.
I could finally stop obsessing over my ex.
Gyms been goin great by itself, but i already stopped caring about the look in that department.
Small wins!
I relate so much on the fitness and job aspect and definitely not caring too much on how we look makes it all right
I love this! I just started a channel less than a week ago and I need to channel more of this. Only having 12 subscribers - I already feel like I lost when all I want to do is make content I enjoy watching myself. I need to not care about acceptance and know as long as I'm happy that's all that matter
I totally relate to this. Well said, I love the concept of the law of detachment! It’s crazy how much these perspective changes can change your life for the better.
absolutely! some of the biggest life changes I've had are from just one simple thing i heard on a podcast/YT vid. super glad you could relate to this video! 😊
Thank you for sharing this. I really needed to hear this right now
Thank you!!!❤ I’m actually crying haha, THIS is the concept I’ve been searching for! I love quotes and theories, short but something I can remember well, and this is it! 😅I try to remember Mel Robbin’s “Let them theory “, which I love, but this captures it in more depth. I actually remember from when I was younger that the time I was tired of dieting and just “gave up”, but still doing my best, that’s when I lost weight, so this reminded me of that. Currently trying to care less about my body and use the clothes I have but feel to ashamed to wear, people wear weirder things than that, I can manage! 😅 I’ve heard of this theory before but since english isn’t my first language (from Norway, so we’ll be closer I hear!) - I thought the word detachment meant something like being overly dependent on other people, like relationship stuff, which I’m the opposite of so I never looked it up. It’s just those words when you like ah I know this and it’s not for me, to realize that it’s potentially life-changing😮
Going out for a walk now in silence to hear myself think, this is my new path to figure out what could do for me!
Best of luck staying in Sweden 🎉
Have been getting better at this recently and it is life changing. Thank you for sharing
I can’t do it, no matter how hard I try NOT to care, no matter what I tell myself, I can’t stop caring about others. People can call me a nice guy, idgaf, I will always be true to myself and if this is the path I’m going down then so be it.
Have you ever tried to do some self reflecting and look inward, and ask yourself big questions like what it is that YOU want out of life? That's where you need to start if you have personal issues with stuff like this. I also HIGHLY RECOMMEND the book: The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson. As cliche as it sounds, I'd at least try a sample if you're able to.
Detachment has nothing to do with not caring about others.
Quality video. Have saved it in my Revisits playlist and will keep coming back to it for encouragement and as a reminder to myself to lower my expectations. Thanks for creating it, Tika!
I just want to say you are so beautiful in your BEFORE pics TOO
I so relate. I do best when I let go and go with the flow while doing what I intend to do. I like to be flexible. Many many times when I stopped giving a fuck, things worked out themselves in another way. I dont think I can continuously focus on what I want or affirming it every chance i get, I like to trust and let go and enjoy my life in peace.
This is so helpful for me, I almost watched all your videos. All of these are so relatable and really helped me to track my life lately. I'm going to follow your points here to have a better understanding of life. Thank you, please keep uploading more of such videos.❤
this si true ive been struggling with porn addiction and i recently stopped caring about relapse and ironically now im making improvments.and completing goals ive never done before. just flowing with life without eexpectations is freedom.
Really great video. I’m brand new to TH-cam and it’s nice to hear your perspective on how it was important to enjoy what you were doing. I’ve been following the numbers to the point where it stresses me out and I only have 79 subscribers right now. So dumb honestly. 😊
For such a young girl, she is really wise 🥰
Speaking the truth!! Glad to have stumbled across for sure!
You can't control your thoughts or feelings. You will be attached whether you like it or not. It's how you react that matters. But that doesn't mean the feelings or the thoughts are in your control, nor that they will go away.
I think you need to be clear. The fact that you cared about the favorable outcome of your new attitude means you actually cared. In reality you just reprioritized and reorganized what is important versus what is less important . You just got older and deeper into adulthood .
Coming from someone who used to be indifferent to academic results to the point where I would not even prepare, those were the times I achieved the highest grades. But then it got to a point where I started to feel stupid and ended up caring too much and the rest is history. So yeah, this is true
Earl Nightengale once said, "Put a wooden beam on the ground and walk on it, from one end to the other. No problem, right? It's easy. Now put the beam up between the tops of two buildings that are nine stories high. Walk along the beam now. It's a completely different experience, isn't it? You'll be so frightened that you'll probably fall. What's the difference between the beam on the ground and the one that's nine stories up? The fear of failure." I think part of detachment is removing that fear.
-detach from the outcome- goal.
(system project* detachment- journey
- passion project
- no contract work* it
- presentation theory_skillshare
project* -
I appreciate you.
I like to handle stressful situations with having ice in my veins, which is a very similar concept as detachment. It works well with tough interviews, presentations or other stressful situations.
When you talk about that, you realize actually everything you surviving by yourself, you don’t need that person to do that anymore Then you start to detach that sound like me back then I just realized that everything is done by myself. I don’t have anybody to come and help me and I’m not really sure that this relationship is gonna be that good future either.
Detachment is so difficult because many of us have been programmed to create goals and work towards the outcome of those goals. I do agree with you that detachment can be a very powerful tool if used correctly. However, there is a time for attachment - if you want to sleep in a a bed with clean sheets then it will probably help to visualise yourself later that night sleeping in a clean bed. That will motivate you to go through the motions from stripping the sheets to finishing making the bed with clean sheets.
You are so right!! I have been there! Thank you for this great video! The Law of Detachment!! WOW! This is great! I love this!
Thank you for this video. My ex cheated on me and I've wasted a month worth of time thinking about why and that hasn't gotten me anywhere.
"Go with the flow" -Taoism
Gonna watch this everyday
Best of luck Tika
This is a great video! Keep doing what you're doing it's good quality content!
I have trained myself from a young age to live life in a detached way and honestly when i say to people i love people but i don't get attached a lot don't understand and I also found it difficult to put in words what i mean which i feel you've done cohesively.
Living life in a detached manner really makes you feel free and at peace. It's wonderful and though its also something you have to keep consistent like physical activity it is so worth it in the end cause you live your life feeling everything that will happen eventually comes to you in ways even better than you have expected or possibly thought
i watched it damn right time. My all situations are going down mentally these days. And i know i'm caring too much all things in my life and bam this video comes out ❤ sometimes youtube is a god's hand😂
Thank you for this clip actually I have recently starting to do this and for me it was surrendering to the universe and trusting the process because its kind of same thing law of detachment. Its about not taking life too seriously but do what you can, trust the process and be consistent
Thank you for sharing this. I'm trying to find my niche here on TH-cam as well and it has definitely been hard to balance the goals I have set for myself and the mindset of taking things as they come. Can't wait until I find where my content fits in while just enjoying the creative process.
This video is super relatable thank you 🍀🙏
I just found your channel and I LOVE THE WAY YOU EXPLAIN, it's like you actually know how to explain it step by step
aw that's so great to hear! 😭 i take quite a bit of time to script out things and I'm always revising/rewriting bc I'm paranoid it won't make sense to anyone else but me 😂😅
@@TikaGhafar~ Never feel that way, feel free to express it your own way, others will get perfectly. Nevertheless, you were awesome in getting across. Lots of smiles to you...😊
@@sunsun2089 awww thanks so much for this, that was really encouraging to hear :) glad you thought so!
Great video Tik. Just what I needed. Nice to see you so excited and happy :) Keep it up.
Very interesting video, and i can confirm from personal experience that everything you say is actually how it works. At least for me. Greetings from.... SWEDEN 🇸🇪😂 no joke
Stop giving people or places your power. They exist and get feed out of your energy. Take care ❤
Glad I stumbled across your channel… like a breath of fresh air. Thanks, Tika ‼️😊
I am surprised you don’t have more subscribers because you are a awesome young lady and you have bought purpose by to my life
There is no such thing as caring too much. There is such a thing as being unable to keep emotions from impacting behavior. There is such a thing as a lack of accountability that keeps people from getting out of their own way and realizing that bear fault for 99% of our problems. You didn’t care too much. You actually cared to little to prepare yourself to succeed.
wonderful it all worked out once you let go. I am happy for you! thanks for sharing your story
While the sentiment of relinquishing concern may seem liberating, the assertion that life fundamentally improves by disregarding all care is dubious. Embracing apathy risks stagnation and deprives life of its depth and richness. True fulfillment often arises from meaningful engagement and purposeful investment, not from detachment.
Beautiful message, Beautifully put‼️
Subscribed 🤙🏾👌🏾
yesss! Exactly what I just self discovered lately and I wanna dive deeper into really happy to stumble upon your great video. Thank you so much~