We need to talk about male suicide | Steph Slack | TEDxFolkestone
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 13 มิ.ย. 2024
- At some point in your life you’ll probably be touched by male* suicide. It’s now the biggest killer of men under 45 in the UK with 12 men taking their own lives every day.
In her challenging TEDx talk, Steph Slack shares her personal story of how losing her uncle to suicide caused her to question how we react to men who experience suicidal thoughts.
Steph asks: what if we stop seeing having suicidal thoughts as something unusual, change our stereotypical expectations of men and instead, support men who have the courage to be vulnerable with us?
What would happen if we all went home and had conversations with the men in our lives about what they’re feeling and thinking? The answer to solving today’s male suicide crisis may be simply listening to the men in our lives.
If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts or are in crisis, in the UK Samaritans operate a 24/7 helpline on 116 123 or CALM operate a helpline 5pm to midnight for men on 0800 585858.
*all those who identify as male.
Her portfolio of work focuses on three areas: the workplace (as an independent speaker and consultant advising on CR, D&I and wellbeing with a particular focus on mens' mental health and suicide awareness); schools (as Director of Who In The Zoo - a social enterprise producing a new classroom tool to help children understand and communicate their emotions); and the community (as a speaker and writer on mental health and male suicide prevention). Connect with Steph:www.hellostephslack.com This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
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"If anything happens to a guy it's just considered funny." - Bill Burr
That is simply not true.
Woman like destroyin men
@Bleed The Machines Those men don't take any responsibility for their own lives and actions. Instead they blame everything on government and women.
@@nickidaisyreddwoodd5837 ya'll are dense judging dudes off of a pretty funny Bill Burr joke.
Notsonorm Exactly!
Guaranteed, he died for the same reason it took 3 weeks to find his body
This needs to be top comment.
That's deep
*O o f*
Whoa heavy
He was alone...
The fact it took 3 weeks to found his body explains why he did it
Bro this is the realest comment I’ve seen. Really hits hard..
Oh i thought he intentionally went somewhere remote to commit suicide, so that he wouldn't bother anyone. That's what I would do.
I didn't think he did it in his bedroom and no one visited him. Since he worked as a doctor, the hospital must have notified someone that he hadn't been going to work.
Been struggling with schizoaffective disorder for 6 years. I want my ending to be either the ultimate victory over my disease or the greatest tragedy ever. I'm confused about what option should I choose, as if I'm in a video game
@@arnoldronald3044 accept yourself even if no one else does. Remember no1 really has the easy road maybe just the illusion of it. Remember that you have a gift to offer the world & become more of a human being than a human doing. It’s a huge problem in delusional societies that our worth is evaluated by what we achieve etc… this is more lies to keep society a certain way & keep people lined up like sheep. Be yourself speak up it’s going to get better for you.
RIDICULOUS. You DIDN'T know him
I’d trade half of my intelligence for an actual social life, a loving relationship, and actual security in myself.
Sometimes that won’t even help you, I’ve got all those and I still feel this way, idk the answer but it’s not those
What is your IQ?
@@EldritchPursuit -10000
I envy those north sentalise people
Men would trade almost everything for that, women are literally living a mans fantasy and women STILL find time to complain and get annoyed when we say they have things easier, they genuinly dont understand though, they assume all guys are good with women , because, think about it, the only guys who get women ARE good with women else they wouldnt get them, so women think all guys dont have any problems seducing women. They just dont understand that the majority of males are not good at pick up and get rejected by women all the time.
Dead people recieve way more flowers than the living because regret is stronger than gratitude.
- Anne Frank
@Itima Ramon You dont know what their intentions are tho, they have a right to act like you're a crazo. You could be a stalker for one
i like that quote
@Itima Ramon Just please dont try to be philosophical and 'woke', it's cringy
@Itima Ramon Keep searching bois, we gotta find out who asked
@@schematic2684 You are probably one of the reasons that people commit suicide.
*When a man runs out of reasons to live, he starts to look for reasons to die*
You know you're suicidal when you're starting looking for reasons to live
Ironicly enough, sometimes this mentality may lead to great achievements and self revelation, not always but sometimes great things come out of dropping your ego.
Which are plenty.
@@nomad8166 yea at first I was gonna kill myself but now I think I'm gonna murder someone instead
triledink my husband committed suicide on March 25th 2019. I found him dead in our bed.(he overdosed on antipsychotic meds) It was a selfish act to not even think about myself or the kids. I’m so angry because there is so much help for people today yet he chose to kill himself🤦🏿♀️😢
I have never had any good come from discussing my feelings with anyone.
cap
agreed, everyone wants us to open up but then we're ridiculed for being sensitive and weak.
That says so much about where society has failed.
@@artdirector500 I believe him, my experience is the same when it comes to discussing negative feelings.
Take your cap back and eat it.
@@_Meriwetherbecause you don’t have good friends. There are people who care. The people you’re talking to now aren’t your friends
“He’s just the the kind of guy you wanna spend time with”
I have a friend who I told I just needed a couple hours to sleep cuz I’ve been working all day and she let me nap on her lap on a pillow. 5 hours later I wake up apologizing to to her and she gives me the most meaningful “don’t worry about it”
I needed that for 6 years
Who is your lord grave first question
India don't burn dead body not allowed
And yet they didn't find him for 3 weeks.😢
@@Analoguedialog India don't burn dead body not allowed
That girl is a fuckin treasure my friend, damnn
When a man opens up about his emotions, they say he should man up. When a man doesn’t open up, they say it’s a toxic masculinity.
we literally cannot win either way we’re screwed
@@ctg5679 thanks to modern radicals.
@@asificam1 women say kill all men, at this rate that my happen, anyone who opens up about suicide is stronger than they were before, men go through so much, just as well as women, everyone should be treated equally in an emotional level, because this isn't the 50s, we can all grow and become better, its not to late to change and grow, and you need to open up because later on you will realize that you made a great decision and you realize that you are worth something and you are stronger, as i found out.
I've use to be suicidal. I never did it for attention, I kept it a secret and once I tried to open up about my suicidal feelings, I was told I was a little b*tch. After awhile I stopped giving a sh*t if people seen me having suicidal signs. Now that after all those situations I've been through, I value everyone's problems no matter how small it was.
Hey stop right there, you can't have it both ways. Gosh men are so selfish
“Only women, children and dogs are loved unconditionally. A man is only loved under the condition that he provide something.” - Chris Rock
Bingo
These comment needs alot more likes so truth
That’s the truth
Tell that to all the women who have been betrayed by men. It certainly doesn't feel like unconditional love. If a man is a good father his children will love and respect him.
@@Mmmmkaaay the amount of betrayed women in comparison to the amount of men loved on that condition is inconsequential. The amount of betrayed women is a low percentage of the female population. The amount of men loved conditionally is the vast majority of the male population.
The scariest thing I've ever experienced in my life is desperately screaming for help and people hearing but no one listening. Please try to hang in there, fellas.
💔💔💔
no, not anymore
Why?
Nah... the scaries thing in my life was working for various corporations, in the middle of so called developed country, capital city. As a contractor.
What working for multiple organizations/corporations have shown me... is that nobody cares about it.
Not at the workplace, even when talking to your co-workers during day to day, or coffee chats in the kitchen, or even in any official way (via yearly compulsory tests, such as you sometimes have to do on year to year basis). None of that covers any mental issues. None. And I've worked with a lot of them.
And that is not even opening a box of how society, or official organizations are treating that. Good luck with getting a proper mental care, or approach... without money. Really good luck with it, as it simply wont happen, if you are a man. Nobody cares. At the end of the day, the system is not designed to care as such. Never has been. You want care? You have to pay. And it is as simple as that.
Hey how are you doing right now? I hope ur doing well !
I cried in front of my girlfriend of 2 years for the first time a few days ago, she knows I struggle with depression and anxiety and the other day she saw the marks on my legs from SH. She just hugged me and told me it was ok to cry. It ment a lot to me.
Keep her close
That’s not a girlfriend, that’s a woman bro, a real woman. Keep her close.
wait until she throws it in your face one day during a fight. Guaranteed to happen, dont be surprised.
Danm you should have done that now she will cheat
I hope your ok
"Men should express their feelings more"
"I am depressed"
"Oh get over yourself"
Oof
true
So true on so many levels
The man: Guess I'll die then
@gabriel p shut up
Men’s issues don’t matter until a woman talks about them.
Please let that sink in
The real joke is that you think its about men's issue, when its clearly just a virtue signal
Oof
that is the best comment I’ve read
I've had worse.
@@Vishnu_Karthik pretty sure mens suicide rate is a mens issue...
I'm a male soon turning 35, been single for almost all my life and the victim of childhood trauma. I have been more or less depressed since 12 and struggling with my self worth, suicidal thoughts and relationships.
On the subject that nobody really cares. I had a break up with a girl many tears ago and was devastated, not on as much losing her as on losing myself in the thoughts that my depression will never leave me and that I can't hold relationships. On the train home from her I desperately tried to message friends to have someone to come over to and talk to and comfort me. Everyone responded with something like they didn't have the time or what not. My heart sank and I got that knot of severe angst in my stomach o so familiar. I ended up sitting alone on the train holding my tears back for three hours.
I know that feeling, desperately Need and want someone to talk to or just sit with but everybody is so busy with whatever , and maybe even then telling you how and where to look for making new friends...
Anyways, know that I feel you and you are not alone with being left alone, maybe in that we can gain strength?
Damn
That is something!!
I would hug you strong ❤
I called my mother about me getting her car. I didnt like the way she communicated about IT with my father and stood Up for myself. I told her that I feel Like they are talking over my head. She acted like I was being ungrateful I guess she wasnt even hearing me.
Then I told her me being miserable and that No one hears what I am saying ever, Like the past 32 years of my life.
This was about a Week ago. I havnt Heard anything from her since.
Am I just being childish or is it okay to be hurt?
A judge once told me in family court before my attempt “ I frankly don’t care what happens to you”. In regards to being homeless because 90% of what I made went to alimony and child support. ONTOP of loosing my house, retirement.
I got tired of fighting to stay alive.
Men could get rid of the demon that caused them trouble in the first place. Why do demons get to live comfortably? There's more than enough suffering to share..
I'm one of those men that tell other men to toughen up but not like you'd think. I speak as a man coming from the exact same place as you. But I turn the pain into righteous indignation and fight back that way. I get peace knowing at least I defended my honor and all the good that was instilled in me from childhood. I found that letting people get away with degrading me is the part that haunts me not because of what they think but because that's what gives them the confidence to take from you. I've not once lost once I decided to correct people and draw hard lines. On the contrary many times I can pick their pockets if I felt like it even. We do need to get intouch with the warrior in us and use it more. Or become part of a collective of like-minded men that represent the regime and tap in that way. Every molecule in everything on earth responds to a man who knows his strength whether as a leader or member of an army.
If a man gave this talk, everybody would be like "Oh quit your whining..."
Publius Velocitor I hate how this is true😔
I'm really worried about what type of people you're surrounded by
Correct, they would not listen to him. The feminists in the room only care when high value men (who create wealth such that women can consume it) commit suicide. Otherwise, its crickets. They just don't care. And they would rather the low value men commit suicide because that is less money the feminists must pay (in taxes) to support these low value men the instant they no longer want-to/can provide resources.
@@MrAsyo1 society?
@@eachdaybetterthanthenext5567 People around me actually think
I have a female friend and she called me weak for having depression and opening up my suicidal thoughts. That was the moment she failed to be my friend.
Mine was older and more worldly. She told me I should head to the hospital and check myself in, then she ghosted me.
Hope your still here
@@savagesalvage9449 probably more to that story then you told
but its ok to be weak, we all need help to be strong
@@WorldKeepsSpinnin
What a goofy thing to say. You mind showing your work so the rest of the class can follow along?
There are guys out there in pain, there are guys who’ve been forgotten, left behind, and are alone through it. It’s nice to see someone addressing it
No. Sometimes you go to work, you have a chat with your coworkers, you have a good job - but at the end... you are alone. Truly alone at the end. And nobody care about your mental issues if you are a man. Nobody. And that is... painfull to see and experience. I can only repeat what I have written before, sorry to repeat myself:
"What working for multiple organizations/corporations have shown me... is that nobody cares about it.
Not at the workplace, even when talking to your co-workers during day to day, or coffee chats in the kitchen, or even in any official way (via yearly compulsory tests, such as you sometimes have to do on year to year basis). None of that covers any mental issues. None. And I've worked with a lot of them.
And that is not even opening a box of how socifty, or official organizations are treating that. Good luck with getting a proper mental care, or approach... without money. Really good luck with it, as it simply wont happen. Nobody cares. At the end of the day, the system is not designed to care as such. Never has been. You want care? You have to pay. And it is as simple as that."
I have always wondered why this is not a topic of discussion. Most men live a life of depression but sadly not many people notice it. It must be great to have someone ask you "How was your day?", "Have you eaten anything?" or the most important one "Are you okay?" Dear reader if you have a guy in your life, be it a friend, lover, husband, father, brother, or son. Check on them more often. Spend time with them. Give them a little bit of your attention. It will do wonders. 🙏
Yes bro 🙏🏻 so true ❤️
@@dyroxau India don't burn dead body not allowed
It's sad that most of the people watching this video are men who already feel this way, which is why they clicked in the first place. People who didn't already agree with the title probably ignored it and continued on with their day.
Yo I’m vibing here, and am in fact female
That's why i clicked on it.
David Smith Same thing.
Congratulations, you are correct
nah just binging tedtalks
You've missed another important factor: Loneliness
You can't catch everything when it comes to suicide.
Loneliness is a good thing though, for some people like me. It's peaceful
@@johnnguyen553 you are equating a powerful emotion to a state of being. they aren't the same thing. you may feel peace when alone, others feel isolation and depression.
@@chrismofer Some people yearn for belonging, friendships and social interactions. While those things are nice, most people don't understand the true nature of human beings. The underlying motives, and other thoughts, it can really be a either good or bad. But most of the time, its generally a fact that most social relationships are formed with conditions. I realised that not having to care, owe and live up to anyone's approval made me a much stronger person. A person whose belief system is formed with their own and not through the opinions of others. It gave me a back bone and made me self confident. Sure I embrace loneliness because one day, say if I make a lot of fame or friends and suddenly lose it all, I can still be content with life. :)
Other ne/sd
When society deems you unworthy, or worse, worthy of open mockery, due to circumstances you cannot change about yourself, what else can you do?
Don’t think about it
God bless you bro
This woman and like three others are the only ones who legitimately or even pretend to care. 9.75 times out of 10, when someone asks a man what's wrong, it's a case of concern trolling.
?
@@chelseashamim9148 what's there to be confused about?
With all due respect, this woman doesn't care AT ALL. She's only up here to make herself look good. Another narcissist. Women DO NOT CARE. We are fooled if we believe the fallacy of unconditional matriarchal love and care. Only EVER believe a women when her lying mouth is SHUT.
What is “concern trolling”?
@@JLBxFTW Acting like you are concerned only to use the information to make fun of them or insult them later.
I think most women underestimate how much of an impact they can have on men's lives. I'm not just talking about relationships, I'm talking about basic human interaction.
I am a 22 male in a small town in Iowa. I do not have a gf and every time I interact with a female roughly my age. I get the feeling whenever I interact with anyone like that, they think I am trying to date them and get into a relationship and with that they treat me cold and don't give me basic respect. Makes one really depressed.
@@TeddyABear u gotta get jacked and good looking. Then they will thank u
Georgian Wolf Or get rich 🤷♂️ them gold diggers wild
´"Men can´t understand beauty, so women have to restrain from showing their beauty, thus men will not be abble to cope with it, and it is womens responsability", wich they do not clearly own.
Kohl ツ Women also don’t understand how little human contact single men have on a constant basis. Been single the last two years, most I’ve gotten is a handshake.
Physical contact is essential for mental and physical health.
Man: kills himself
Society: just man up
More like 'man down'
it's considered unmasculine for a man to talk about his feelings. time to change that. toxic masculinity is a major problem.
@@fernandoherrera2256 toxic masculinity is non existent
@@daniyil4843 if u really believe that then so be it. ur not really helping the poor men killing themselves though
@@fernandoherrera2256 How does believing in this concept help men from killing themselves?
One male dies from suicide in the US every 14.4 minutes.
This is a great talk, and something that should be spoken about much more open and often.
Me : all I have is suicidal thought.
My male psychologist : me too brother, me too.
me to psych- don't call me brother, i don't pay you to patronize me, you are suppose to be a professional...
@@garystarkey726 Can't believe I paid 5c for this.
For real
@@thewanderingmistnull2451 lol
best comment .
The reality is that our society is more interested in the story of a weeping girl than the stories of 10 men who committed suicide.
Probably think they should be dead when the girl blames them for her problems.
Men need to unite and fight this stereotype
Men are expendable. If we want to be valued, we must do something that causes other people to value us. That isn't a bad thing. In fact, it's a powerful driver of success and innovation. See it as a challenge, not as an indictment of your worth.
Comparing men to women in this way is like comparing apples to oranges. Men can't give birth, so they have to provide value in other ways.
@@paulkerrigan9857 dont u understand? You're the exact reason society is like this.
@@grossly820 you never know... your prayers might be answered.
9:05 it’s definitely not just us. I’ve never had a guy call me weak for having emotions, but I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve heard it from a woman
I’m sorry you had to go through that
I am a depressed girl so I can’t say i know what you’re feeling but I sure do know that everything about depression sucks- hope U get better
@@Hacks536 lovely woman
Thats why is good to have true male friends
@@Hacks536❤
@@alventuradelacruz522 don't die as a disbelievers
I'm writing this in '23. male suicide has only gotten worse.
It really has
And nobody cares about it.... Nobody.
And this is also what working for multiple organizations/corporations have shown me... is that nobody cares about it.
Not at the workplace, even when talking to your co-workers during day to day, or coffee chats in the kitchen, or even in any official way (via yearly compulsory tests, such as you sometimes have to do on year to year basis). None of that covers any mental issues. None. And I've worked with a lot of them.
And that is not even opening a box of how society, or official organizations are treating that. Good luck with getting a proper mental care, or approach... without money. Really good luck with it, as it simply wont happen. Nobody cares. Sad but true.
Damn bro. Think for ypurself then.
Man : "I'm severely depressed and I'm having suicidal thoughts"
Woman: "Think about how hard that is for me to deal with everyday"
If this ain’t the truth I don’t know what is!
I feel that
I feel that
@@KarateWrestler205 MOST? What women are you hanging around?
@@KarateWrestler205 qft.
I once told a woman everything that bothered me (things I felt very insecure about) and in one argument she threw it all back in my face.
Yep
Bitches do that!! Never let them in!!
I consider very carefully everything I say to a woman.
Happened to me, too. That woman was my then wife.
@@Slynsmiley Damn. Even marriages.
It actually brought me in tears. I lost my great father and uncle who committed suicide a couple of years ago. I lost my dad who passed away from a heart attack in February. I gotta say that I have suicidal thoughts and it sucks. Fortunately my family and a friend of mine listen to my distress.
Research Ayahuasca and psychedelics aiding depression and anxiety.
@@nayaknaresh Thanks for your comment. The storm is behind me now. I'm out of depression. That was a freaking bad period of my life but now I feel peaceful.
I’m glad you’re feeling better now. I was getting worried.
Amazing how nothing has actually changed. In fact, it's only exacerbated over the last few years.
😑😑👍👍
Its so strange to see something that is pro-men and tries to help us instead of beating us down...
@Heartslove 3 satan is already here why should we wait.
@Heartslove 3 i just want you to know that i did not read your comment
Your efforts are pathetic and in vain
chaos is coming, hail to the fallen angel
Lmfao wtf is this reply section but I agree with op
Yeah, because women hate men.
@Heartslove 3 hail to the fallen angel
Maybe it's bc of a simple truth: If my wife became depressed and couldn't leave bed, she could keep that up forever. If I did that, she'd leave in two weeks and all would agree I was being irresponsible and abusive.
@@rb1278 By average he meant, not always
Then she isn't the right one man
@@rb1278 you weren’t married....big difference
Ya if the woman get depressed get them a Psych if the guy gets depressed he gets a Cuff up the side of the head and he is told "clue in".
@@rb1278 That’s wrong. I’m sorry he did that to you. Too many men run away from emotions thanks to being raised by a hyper-masculine society. We are raised to not be emotionally available, or ever lean on someone else, and the men who are were raised exactly how they should’ve been.
Totally opened up to my wife, and I showed her my pain. That's how I found out she thinks people that cry are weak. I don't recommend men open up to their wives. It changed the way my wife looks at me.
Your wife needs to grow up
@@natestansbie3954 she has no idea what it's like. I'm glad she will never have to go through this.
I think one of the hardest things about having suicidal thoughts, is knowing truly that no one cares. I'm at this point just living, waiting to die.
Yup 😄
I know how you feel. I'm not living, just existing
@@Covermeporkins11 Exactly
Why are you waiting?
There’s nothing to wait for
@@Yuti640 you're right 🤣🤣🤣🤣
"men are dying"
public - *crickets*
"women are being affected"
public - "we need to do something immediately!"
this is why i am a stoic solipsist
Ong there's something wrong with society smh
@@ivanrodriguez8027 not really it's just a power game. When men have power many abuse it when society flips the women abuse it. This is true for any type of system
I Nemisis l
lmao, he may sound like a troll. but it is the truth. this is what men have sowed from the past. us men would always think why we are usually ignored. but dont you think it is only logical that the minority of the past (women, gays and blacks) are having the attention they deserved? I say, blame our patriarchal society built by the men of past
I Nemisis l
lmao, he may sound like a troll. but it is the truth. this is what men have sowed from the past. us men would always think why we are usually ignored. but dont you think it is only logical that the minority of the past (women, gays and blacks) are having the attention they deserved? I say, blame our patriarchal society built by the men of past
I just stopped talking about it when i learned no one cares.
Viridian: Not sure that no one cares: however very few know how to respond so they shy away from your demons and perhaps their own. There is a reason to call groups like "The Samaritans" in that they do know something about how to respond.
I'm with you on this one bro
Suicide is ok.
I care about you brother, stay healthy. Here is a comment I wrote to someone else, I hope it will help you :D : What I mean by there are good things inside the bad : for example when « friends » gave up on me or betrayed and left me alone I was glad because these confrontations/separations actually helped me see their real faces. I prefer loyalty over fake company. I noticed that my life was better after because I got away of the negativity they bring and I discovered that loneliness was not a bad thing but a good one because it brings more peace than being with people, I can do things I want without adapting myself to someone’s needs, it also helps me to learn to know myslef, to think better, to rest better. Good things in a bad one. Everytime I feel pain because of a problem in life I become more resistant to it and mentally stronger after. The more the life goes on the more I gain experience and mental strength that allow me to resolve the next problems more easily than I would have if I had not been through the previous ones. After thinking about my life when I am alone I realize that these bad events in life actually bring me good things for the future, this made me think that bad events are actually benedictions in disguise. Also I realised that positive thinking helps to go through anything. There is a quote that marked me « When you think positively you see solutions everywhere, when you think negatively you see problems everywhere ». And it is true that when I think positively I tend to do more efforts and think faster and better and find more solutions than I would have negatively. Sorry for taking this much time to respond to you brother. I was going through harsh things these weeks, I was mentally exhausted but remained positive because my chances to overcome everything is better this way. Take care brother, live positively, I love you
Viridian yet another dent in my morale, I am used to it. I did man up, but now I’m stoic and no longer feel emotional about anything, I haven’t loved anyone since 3rd grade.
My only son took his own life a few months ago, he told me he’d felt like this and we had the chat, thought it was put to bed, but he went ahead and done it, left us all devastated, he was drunk! I was only speaking with him on the phone a few hours before, some say it’s selfish, maybe their demons are just too much to bear? Left a huge hole in all our hearts. So sad
:(
This is devastating and I’m sorry for your loss. 😔
Not selfish. Sometimes you just cannot take it anymore. At some point in our lives, a lot of us understand that.
Not that we all may agree with it, but at the human level, the way everything is going, we simply... understand. Sometimes it is just easier to exit all of that, no matter what is waiting on the other side.
Sorry that have happened, and sorry for your loss. Nobody should watch their own child be gone... Nobody.
I can see why other men commit suicide. Society in general treats us like as if we don’t have feelings or emotions. There’s no care in the world for a man and yet all the expectation is on us. It also takes a woman to talk about the subject for people to pay attention lol.
No. At the end... nobody will. At that is the end result of it.
People will simply move on with their own lives, and nobody will care about it. All they will say at the end: "my god, I wish we could have see that comming, he was such a nice guy... ", or "nobody could have predicted it", or "I wish he could have talked about it"... The issue is: he probably did. Just nobody was listening.
Women "Men should talk about their feelings. It's okay to feel vulnerable"
Also women: "Sensitive men are needy and weak. I only date 'real' men"
there are different women you know
@aviators remix 😂😂🤣🤣 wow this is epic man
strawman much
@@sundaw ooh "Im different and cool" attitude? Stop lying
@@sundaw 1% maybe
About a year ago my girlfriend broke up with me because she was thought I was emotional and unstable. She spent 2 years saying she wanted me to be open with her more and that I shouldn't be afraid to be vulnerable about my own problems and that men shouldn't be afraid of expressing their emotion. That was after 2 years of me hiding my problems and emotions from her in fear of her thinking I was anything but a "real" man. I trusted her and opened up to her more about my stress and anxiety in my career and my family.
It's been over a year and I still feel like I never want to trust anyone ever again.
I am 68yo today Oct 16th BTW. In that time I have heard of what real men are from every woman I have ever dated at one time or another. They were all wrong. I am now MGTOW and have learned what real men are. I have also learned what real woman are like. There is no more confusion about women. They are easy to understand. Yet, I don't hate women, I understand them.
Sorry dude. You deserve better anyways.
Gregory Wilkinson Never be afraid to be yourself, your insecurities make you interesting
You didn't deserve that, and being hurt by that is okay.
The general concepts of "men" and "women" have lead us all astray.
Truly, most people are broken in our current world.
We have too many old expectations and rules, and so few genuinely good examples.
Never lose your ability to be yourself, because the more you do it, the more you let go of expectations for others on how they see you, and expectations of the outcomes of your genuine expression, then you can grow.
You owe yourself that much. To grow you inner self and find more genuine people to connect with.
There's no instant gratification to this, but it's the only way true way to fill up that hole in our souls.
One shovel of progress at a time.
I think you misunderstand what most women want when they ask you to be open, talk about your problems and show your emotions.
You can do these things but you have to remain in control. You have to have control over your emotions and you have to make it clear that you are not overwhelmed or broken by your problems and ideally are working on solving them.
If she perceives that you've lost control or have broken under the pressure she will lose interest. You can be vulnerable but you must always be strong and in control. That is practically and by the signals that you send her. She never wants to see you as weak or incompetent because she will not respect such a man.
A few years back i had a mental breakdown after a lot of things in my life fell apart all at once. I reached out to a female friend(who wanted to date me) and told her i was seriously considering taking my own life. Her exact words were “go ahead and do that it’s not my problem.” Ill never forget that as long as I live. No such thing would ever happen to a woman
Not true. I was told those things too
Wow I am sorry about that.
What in the goddamn
Im so glad your still here dude. NEVER EVER Give up ❤❤
If you can't understand why someone would take their own life, then you don't understand depression.
Recently I told my mom how depressed I was everyday. First thing she asked was if I was still able to do my job properly (to earn money) and she suddenly switched the subject on her and how she too was severely depressed but overcame it all and walked away....not once acknowledging my depression. Due to this, and years of toxic narcissism, we no longer talk.
I'm glad you are no longer talking to her! your feelings are valid and I hope you'll get the help you deserve.
There are people who listen and who care, just wanted you to know that
wow that hit close to home, thank you
Very common with women in Finland.
Same bro that’s why I’m here
That expression "Women and children first." also translates as " Men last."
It's messed up man
Nope, it translates to "men never".
its because men dying for no reason ( even when they can be saved) is considered manly and honourable. people need to let them live
It comes from the viewpoint of women being as helpless as children, so idk about that example.
Translates to “ cash in the insurance policy”
Women have so much more power than a lot of them realise. For good or for bad.
Treat the men in your life with compassion.
This is a great video. Society doesn't care about men's health, both physically or mentally. I hide my pain because those around me do not care. A man with depression is a social pariah and society would rather ignore it. I appreciate this presenter because she presented this issue with no political/ideological bias. We need more like her.
what do u expect from people and society in the first place? Better not expect or hope anything good from people/society
@@wealthsong178 don't go near Euphrates River when gold get up
Don't go near Euphrates River when gold get up
Don't go near Euphrates River when gold get up
"You're important"
I can't tell you how many women I've known that make you feel the opposite.
Probably you're choosing the wrong women?
Probably try and choose them not by how they look, but by how they make you feel?
Look up marx's theory of alienation and kimberle crenshaw's theory of intersectionality. If you truly believe its women who are making you feel this way then you need a awaking.
@@maximilianomadrigal6661 Actually, its obvious to see that many women do demean men. I've worked in customer service for a good chunk of my life. I saw, on a regular basis, how wives or girlfriends treated their men. Hen-pecking, talking down to them, etc. The age old saying 'Happy wife, happy life' is the quintessential example of how women have ingrained their desires over men's in a relationship. If THEY aren't happy, no one is. That is BS and utterly defies the concept that a relationship is an equal affair. So yes, Brad's feelings are quite accurate. Women are often the cause of men's worst feelings.
@@DarkAshenfall nope, listen to the lyrics of whatta man by salt n pepper, they talk about a man that yeah looks good but also makes them laugh, spend times with thier kids, respectful, compassionate, caring, interesting but also makes them feel safe. So thats what women want in a relationship and you're saying thats given president over what men want in a relationship, so tell me what do men want in a relationship? If you need dating advice I know great sources for that, though they won't help you with hook ups but more with long term relationships. I know what it's like to be lonely and denigrated, but trust me that's coming from a different source then what you're thinking of.
Joschi Step I think he is talking about women in general, basically man with no value according to them, are invisible.
Man: "I need help"
Society: "You are being selfish"
Man: "I want to die"
Society: "Stop being negative"
Man: "Why can't I be loved for who I am?"
Society: "Be grateful to just be alive"
Man kills himself.....
Society: "We missed the signs."
Literally the cause of male suicide.
Being loved as long as you have a price to pay for it.
Toxic love.
There are many warning signs in school shootings. Most of them are completely ignored, then they say "We missed the signs".
NSA I am an 18 year old male who is thinking about suicide. I want to do die because of my deformed arms. I do not have ten fingers like everyone else and therefore I want to die because I am not a strong man. I am considered “disabled” which means my life is meaningless.
@@keanucooper2103 Hey. I just want to tell you that having a birth defect is nothing you should be so ashamed of. I know my words dont really mean much, because you probably heard this kind of stuff 1000000 times. You just need to know that someday your life will become better. It does not have to be overnight and it can be a tough fight, but as long as you dont give up and believe in yourself, there will be a time, when life becomes easier. Please know that there are people who care abou and love you! I know how it feels to be hopeless and I'm fighting as well but start doing something like exercising or going on a jog every now and then. Try to find something you like and persue that hobby.
Hope you will stay strong
MyNameIsB0by Thank you
I dont wanna be here anymore.
“…The look was somewhere between discomfort and disdain…”
That’s right because women inherently hate men they perceive as weak, whether they want to or not. You can’t cry or even tell your insecurities to a woman because they will see you as unreliable and untrustworthy and resent you for it. “How is this guy going to take care of me and my emotions when he can’t even keep his in check?” We simply aren’t allowed that luxury around women.
You gotta get something off your chest, tell it to your homies. They understand and care for you at the end of the day.
Exactly, the homies have got your back, cause they understand how it is
There are two births in some men's life : the day their mother brings them to the earth, and the day they realize they're all alone
Nah you never walk alone... Familie and friends will be there.. and if they aren't the state will care for you (at least in civilised countries ( not in the USA=D )).. and after all If u believe in God you will never be forgotten...
cheers..
well im all alone have no friends expect like 1 or 2 and my family brly even looks at me and im sure there are a lot of people experiencing the same thing as me
Even though that sounds kinda corny,it really is true.
@@J-IFWBR Atheists with no friends and an abusive family: Are we a joke to you?
@@korkkork7505 you show him :)
I only cry in private. Many women don't like sensitive men, and see it as a sign of weakness.
I feel that why is it only women can be sad?
I can confirm that
I like sensitive people more..or people with mental illnesses. Because i understand how it feels like going through it.
dear men...i am a female... but i NEVER judge any men if they cry...my love to u all men... :) !!!
M2
Every day, 22 military veterans take their lives in the United States. My husband became part of this statistic two weeks ago. While this TED-Talk addresses the UK statistics (for the most part), it still shows that mental health for men is seriously lacking. Something needs to be done to address and provide help for male suicide victims, via better mental health care worldwide.
Sorry to hear that. Don't give up
What bothers you about your husband's suicide?
Never "open up" fellas. Remain stoic. Get you some guy friends to talk to. Women will always look down on you for being emotionally vulnerable
RIDICULOUS
@@BBAKER22 whats so ridiculous? He is s not 100% right but he's also not wrong.
this ideology is what keeps you single and alone
nah all my friends are successful with women
ill never relate to them or take their advice
its pretty much the same as talking to a woman
@@BBAKER22 ridiculous but it's true, the fact that it's true is ridiculous..
"The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation." Thoreau. 1854
"Quiet desperation is the English way" - Floyd 1973
@marty mcfly You know about changing over to another road? Get off the big broad highway and get on the narrow path to Jesus before it's too late man. He can help you out, and I'll pray for you that you can overcome the difficulties you've been facing. God Bless you!
"A woman wrote my quotes, but women don't quite count yet in our society." Thoreau. 1854
I don't remember who said this but it was: "When a woman die, it's a victim. When a man die, it's a statistic".
Hits deep
That's incorrect,
That quote was made by stalin, "if a man die, it's a tragedy, if a hundred men die, it's a statistic"
It's the difference between dying in the war and dying on the home front.
Artyom It’s similar to Stalin’s quote that I’m going to paraphrase:
“When 1 man dies, it’s a tragedy. When 1,000,000 men die, it’s a statistic”
Edit: “A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic”
So true
Well I'm 23 now and when I was 22 I had a mental breakdown. My parents had high hopes for me and the thought of not being able to fulfill it tore me. I haven't cried for more than a decade in front of anyone. One day i was talking to my mum and I cried in front of her. And she told me,"You are a man, don't cry". It's not like my mum is a bad mother or anything. She is a lovely woman and i love her. But the mentality imbued in her head by the society is insane. Luckily I got through in just a year and I'm studying what I love
Thank you so much for this candid discussion. Such a critical importance. And conveyed so beautifully with so much compassion and non-judgment.
Woman talking about male suicide- gets 41k views.
Woman talks about life not being "fair" and talks abkut how much we need feminism on Buzzfeed- 32 million views....
nearly 54k views now.
@@user-ot1ur9so2y after how many months?
@@user-ot1ur9so2yyou completely missed the point
But if you think about it, buzz feed is a popular channel.
You tubes guiding people to the wrong direction
men are expected to be strong and show no emotion, the moments we do to a woman, we know we are immediately seen as weak and are no longer considered a potential partner, so we keep our pain and loneliness to ourself until we cannot bear it no more
it s not that you conditioned not to show emotions, the reason is your government and society in general, west is a dangerous place for men
@@learnnottogiveaf8747
How is the West a dangerous place for men, is it because women are standing up for themselves and refusing to be kept in the home popping out babies? smh
I think it's pretty natural for men to not show as much emotion.
Stoicism has nothing to do with suicide. The west is best place for men to actually show emotion. If the cause of the male suicide epidemic is not being able to share their emotions and "keep their loneliness inside", the west should have a lower suicide rate than any other place in the world as being open is way more frownd upon in for example the middle east. I'm not claiming I have the solution, but I know for a fact that men being stoic is not the cause.
I don't think he thought at all about his comment and just babbled in ineptitude and hyperbole for "likes". "The West" is the absolute safest point in time and space that humankind has EVER had the priviledged of experiencing. We today live better than the highest Kings and queens of all time. Is it still "dangerous"... Sure.. all nature is by definition. But I agree his comment was incomplete at best.
Guys be strong! If you show weakness and vulnerability women will destroy you for sure!
Very true. If you show vulnerability to a women, she'll use it against you later on.
Crying next to a girl is like bleeding next to a shark. Remember that
This is true. I went through severe depression and chronic suicidal ideation because my wife didn’t give a damn about my needs. I didn’t need much, but everything was “my problem”, and when it was clear I was depressed, she kept escalating things and wondered why it didn’t get better. The divorce was finalized a week ago.
Take care brother. You matter. Your needs, your feelings matter. You're not alone.
Loneliness is the worst mental pain
I can relate to this. Try to be completely alone, with no Internet and no distractions. Then, you'll understand how it feels to be a desperate person
If u control ur thoughts when ur alone then there is nothing that can scare u
@Bunsen Yeah, I can relate to this. You couldn't named it better
@@gopalakrishnasriram1896 You are one of the worst people I've ever come across on the internet, congratulations. Depression is a severe illness that deprives you of your ability to control your thoughts and, albeit indirectly, deprives you of utter control over yourself in time.
@@johannes8637 I don't even want to imagine being even without internet or any sort of distraction... I might've already killed myself if that'd happened to me...
"I cannot begin to describe the look I see on some women's faces when I speak about how men I know have broken down in tears in front of me. It's somewhere between discomfort and disdain".
That statement couldn't be more true.
@Joe H wtf
@Joe H we are allowed tf
@@JustAlive21 Yes we are allowed by judged and humiliated for it so it is better not to.
Joe H the strong silent type. That’s the ideal goal.
You can go drown your sorrows with a bottle on the weekends.
That or smoke compulsively.
Or both, like I do.
Just want you to know if you read these that you saved me from a downward spiral of depression. Thank you so much. I forget sometimes that there are people that do care, and this helped me find the help I needed. You probably saved my life in the long run
I’ve noticed a trend that Men aren’t usually loved unconditionally, only when they provide do they get the love they desire .
The fact that a woman has to speak about this in order for people to listen tells you everything you need to know about the treatment of men in the western world
ikr . if men spoke about themselves apparently they are complaining or "anti woman" you aren't anti woman unless you do something offensive. you guys have your own problems and i respect that and we can solve them
I would very much have to disagree with her belief that it's an issue relating to stereotype, however. She's basically calling masculinity and a social construct. No, we're wired; biologically programmed a certain way.
*About society
@@Davito2000 so your saying all guys are the same? wait what i don't get this "biologically programmed the same"
@@Davito2000 No every brain is different. You can just make up some bs about being wired a certain way, you have control over your actions.
The thing that stopped me from killing myself was the sad realization that people I love more than myself would be the ones who found my body after I was gone.
Stay strong brother 💙
That quote fits me so well.. if it wasn't for the parents..
Feel that on a deep level
I hope you're still going, and can find a reason to love life for yourself. Or make one.
Can't stress how true that feels dude, I would love to just not be here, but then everyone else would get all sad
This is exactly how I’m feeling right now and this is also exactly what I want to hear and I think she is explaining it perfectly
I just started crying when she said close your eyes and started talking about if we had a bad day and if we felt suicidal, because I closed my eyes and raised my hand on both occasions
When I was younger, I went to a meeting with my local council, as I was homeless and suicidal. A female member of the council met with me, and after our meeting, she stated "a 21 year old male, should be able to look after themselves." (NFDC UK)
I'll never forget that.
Sam Hopper I hope you’re doing okay now man
Sounds like she shouldn't be on any council's and is out of touch with the world around her. I'd be happy to tell her that for you. Until then I will pray every night that wakes up with diarhea.
I hope you're doing okay now, brother.
@@generalvanman8270 Jesus that is so tragic. My thoghts go out to you bruv.
@@generalvanman8270 This broke my heart bro. That's pretty damn high. Please live a long life.
“When the world turns its back on you, you turn your back on the world”
- that little thing from lion king.
Timon from lion king
@@witoldskrzydlewski6827 thank you I low-key wanted to scream at them
Damn...I felt that.
That's MGTOW defined.
@@Dosbomber ???what
Women like this are so extremely rare.
Thank you for giving me hope, will listen to this again hopefully
Do women even care about this topic?
Because i only see males in the comment section
@pancake with jam ja man 😁
I care
Of course we care.
We can say the same about the men, but I'm not going to, cause I don't think there's a poin in it. I don't want to consider the aspect of suicides dividing it into male and female.
I do. I care about males even more.
I can't express how liberating it feels when a woman takes a moment to let us open up about our feelings.
True...Very comforting.
I dont know how it is at your country but at mine thats how exactly and actually it is 50% men 50% women
@TheHellogoo she's like an early adopter showcasing how updating our operating system better improves our day to day lives
Why is she speaking to me it feels like
how sad; "*let's* us open up'?
"Single status" in a man is not "searching for the one", it's searching for anyone at all.
Yes, that's true unfortunately.
That is deeply profound, my friend.
Excellent TED talk, one of the best I have listened to.
i was a very emotional man but now society is turning me to a cold brick
I like your username
Relatable
same here, buddy.
Can’t relate to anything more. I look back on me even just a few years ago. Far out I was awesome. So dam optimistic and positive about the future.
Now, only 2 years later I’m still trying to be a good person but I disconnect from people a lot. I hide more of my emotions and I am becoming more angry agitated.
I'm not afraid to cry in public about something genuinely upsetting
Anyone who calls me a baby are probably just secretly bottling their feelings
“All it takes is one bad day to drive the sanest man into lunacy”
purpleblunt Everyone has a breaking point indeed and most people after that either:
-Kill themselves
-Go insane
Comic books can be so real...damn
@Snickeres 557 thats the problem, telling people to just "man up"
In my experience that's due to impulsivity, a lack of calmness and patience, struggle with this myself
I want some of ur purple haze 😍
Currently 21 years old and have wasted my entire life feels like there's nothing left to live for anymore been feeling this way for atleast 3 years now
Thank you Steph..! The last few words are what people wanna hear..! That there is nothing wrong with them... For feeling so.. and it's okay to feel so...
We're told We're weak for showing emotions and we're told we're weak for not expressing them. Yet people still wonder why we resort to suicide and nothing else
people dont want you to commit suicide because they want you to suffer and they want to continue to flex their superiority over you, which is why they take those final shots at you after you end it.
Yes, this thing need to end.
I hope you don’t. Because their will be people shielding you from those remarks. Their will be people loving and supporting you.
“we”?
dont believe to negative people
just ignore them they dont know what have youe been through pls dont give up
i hate people who is ridiculing men who are called weak because they cry😡
just stay away from them dont entertain anymore
As a male who's been severely suicidal for over 15 years, I thank you for this. It's so hard living like this with no one to confide to.
I’m here buddy just someone scrolling down the comments but I’m here
Long time
I too have been suicidal for the past 16 years or so. Sometimes the only thing that keeps me here is my two nieces, my mother, my brother, and my sister-in-law. if they weren't in my life . . . i don't know
hang in there, find something you're passionate about and work it into your everyday life, give yourself something to be happy about, something to continue living and prospering, your life is worth too much to toss it aay.
Hey, I'm here if you need me man, I don't think I'm good support but I'll listen. I can give you my discord tag if you want to chat.
There is a post written by a trans man I think about a lot. He mentioned as a man he felt socially and emotionally malnourished and was shocked that people just didn't care especially after experiencing the exact opposite while being perceived as a woman before transitioning. People looking at it from the outside will never really get it because men generally hold a position of privilege but it's more than that, men don't have it necessarily better in all circumstances there are just as many gendered issues we face. I genuinely believe at least half of the men in the UK(from my experience)are cripplingly lonely and noone notices. As a somewhat suicidal person who was raised as a boy Ive never been checked up on about it even after asking people to.
Although women have there own gendered issues (often more inherently dangerous/damaging) I think the fact that this was presented by a woman who mainly speaks about how this issue effects her speaks volumes. That men can only really have there gendered issues spoken about and taken seriously by people who have experiences outside being a man.
To all the people out there with similar experiences please stay strong and know that every human life (including your own) has inherent value. If you want to vent/talk please feel free to leave anything you want read in the replies.
Don't go near Euphrates River when gold get up
men generally do not hold a position of privelege
Such an important conversation to be had.
i tried it, i failed, told my family, they say i'm weak, it is my choice and i should really do it, sister literally said she wished i succeeded. my gf left after that. humanity sucks.
Don't do it again. I don't know you, but you have one person rooting for you. And judging by the comments under this video....thousands that are rooting for you. Just because we are strangers doesn't mean we aren't out there. We exist. And we care.
Surround yourself with new people if those people have truly given up on you, and have that sort of despicable opinion. They are not good people it is never justified to talk to you the way they have.
Man, I really wish I could see people’s pasts. How could a family could react like that to their own sons / brothers attempted suicide.
Damn your family is worthless stay safe man
i support u fam
Saddest part is that a woman has to talk about men's rights/issues for it to be taken seriously.
I don't take it seriously when a woman tries to internalize male problems.
damn right brother, welcome to *s-s-s-s-societyy*
Oh please. Have a little self respect.
@@MarkRai-ko1sk Lmao what?
@@Canadian789119 Ok Jessie 😐
There once was a man who went in to see a therapist. Lately, this man is in despair, openly weeping over every misfortune and heartbreak he's endured. The therapist thought for a moment and said, "You need a break. Here's something: the great clown Pagliacci is traveling here into town today and is going to perform his vaudeville comedy. You should go maybe seeing his show will cheer you up." The man paused at this before bursting into tears. "But doctor," he said. "I am Pagliacci!"
Don't go near Euphrates River when gold get up
@@ibrahimghibihisab8913 why? What will happen?
Thank you for this message.
Girlfriend: "you can talk to me always, I'll understand!"
Boyfriend: *talks about his anxiety/depression
Girlfriend: "ew, you're broken goods. Goodbye"
Idk if this is meant to be satirical but if this has happened to u just know not all women are like this...
Just the women who treats u as nothing but an Accessory or just to brag about
@@stringly-chi3072 Of course not all women are like this. But it happens often enough to be a pattern that a lot of men (myself included) have experienced and talk about online. That should tell you it's a somewhat common problem.
@@SeanConneryPimpShlap Can attest, I was "damaged goods" after that conversation & left to rot
Why do most the guys I know actually are in a relationship with the girls who staied with them even when they knew their depressed. We aren't all like this. Actually women are more understanding then men idea of being men and what men say to othet men.
@@SeanConneryPimpShlap I once cried in front of my g/f who I had just caught cheating on me. The look on her face was pure disgust and she was so done with me. I swear she would have had more respect for me if I had beaten her in that moment.
I vowed to never be vulnerable in front of a woman again.
Yes, tell us your suicidal thoughts and we'll use the law to take your freedoms, your family, and everything away.
Nailed it. I'm fighting a debilitating depression and anxiety apparently brought on by childhood trauma. My therapist doesn't think it's my fault. Everyone else I know does (without knowing anything beyond that I'm not working, that is).
I allowed myself to believe it was ok to ask for help. Big mistake. Tell me again to just snap out of it, man up, or stop thinking negatively. Because that works... if you want another suicide.
coda creator I’m so sorry bud. It’s a rough time, and don’t think there’s ever been more nuance, I know I’m a stranger to you, but hearing what you had to say struck a cord. My best friend killed himself about 5 months ago and my world imploded. Hope it helps that some online stranger is really hoping you’re able to make it out of some dark times.
@@blakemirowski500 I can't even imagine what that's like. I really wish you the best. It's not something you can or got to get over, but I hope you won't get down too much. Cheers to your bud, too. I'm not religious at all, but I think there's a place within us, call it our heart or simply our memory, where a tiny part of the people we love will always be. Remember him as you know him and cherish the good memories you shared. Lots of love
@@codacreator6162 Coda I know I am a stranger, but am a man dealing with alot of the same issues you vaguely mention here, as a fellow man. Been told all the same lines too.All I can say is try to stay strong, I know it's a struggle,believe me I know. But it can get better.
@@codacreator6162 hang in there. I have had suicidal depression and severe anxiety. After 3 years getting help I am doing okay now. Still hits me sometimes, but for less time and not as bad. I found people who did understand, online and joined a men's group who really helped me out. I found telling people I have an illness helped. Lots of us have been there, or are there. When I walk down the street one in 8 I pass by have some kind of mental illness. Its everywhere, and hardly anyone knows what to do. Hang in there. Recovery is possible.
Going through betrayal, isolation, regret, surrounded by people you despise and hate and your friends making fun of you after reaching out and having no trustworthy friends to talk to really REALLY FUCKS with the mind
I was depressed in my early twenties and my girlfriend almost left me when I tried opening up about it because she said I was depressing her…
Now I’m in my late twenties, still depressed but just hiding it very well…
Maybe not for much longer tbh
chin up soldier
I hide it from people I tried to vent to my friends one laughed and joked about it the other under stood the fact I feel the no one cares about me
Make sure it is a quick death.
Yeah this life is stacked against us buddy. Women never have to be lonely lonely they choose not to, we don't have that luxury as men, my world is getting colder too buddy, keep Going is all we can do
“He saved lives for a living. Yet decided to take his own.”
That hurts a little different for some reason.
Yep...hard to grasp but needs to be.
Please do not prey for the hopeless people with your religious message in here. There's a time and place for everything but this is certainly not it.
Probably because many people ironically label suicide as a "gravely selfish" act, but often those that committed suicide were the complete opposite and very selfless.
IRONIC! he could save others from death, but not himself.
@@celticnoble5650 Just because the act itself is selfish, doesn't mean the actor is.