Bisexuality: The Invisible Letter "B" | Misty Gedlinske | TEDxOshkosh

แชร์
ฝัง
  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ม.ค. 2019
  • Perception is everything. It impacts our public image, as well as our personal relationships. Being open about one's orientation is a risk, but one that can pay off by living a fully authentic life. Visibility can break down stereotypes, eliminate shame and secrecy, and create accessible, realistic representation and role models.
    Misty Gedlinske is a Fond du Lac, Wisconsin resident originally from Asheville, North Carolina. She received her Associate of Applied Science degree in Leadership Development from Moraine Park Technical College in May 2018, and will transfer to UW-Green Bay in August to pursue her B.A.S. degree in Nonprofit Leadership. Her professional career includes over a decade in local government administration as a Municipal Clerk.
    She is the founder of Fond du Lac Pride Alliance, a community outreach effort connecting local LGBTQ+ individuals and their allies with services, resources, and welcoming organizations. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

ความคิดเห็น • 2.1K

  • @milififi5006
    @milififi5006 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8083

    "I picked a partner. Not a side"
    So important

    • @powergirl5693
      @powergirl5693 4 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      I nearly cried at this part, it is just so true💖💜💙

    • @berrystein9197
      @berrystein9197 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Facts

    • @milififi5006
      @milififi5006 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Georgette Petrova Good call. I have this image as a profile pic since ever, but I'm still obsessed with this manhua _-_

    • @zachhoy
      @zachhoy 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      that was the PRIMARY takeaway from this imo

    • @oliviawilliams5916
      @oliviawilliams5916 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      that was heart warming to hear.

  • @lenaschubert5533
    @lenaschubert5533 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2842

    "I PICKED A PARTNER NOT A SIDE"
    LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK

    • @PHlophe
      @PHlophe 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Tante Lena gas spoken

    • @redacted5078
      @redacted5078 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Preach

    • @sebeauhomevideo2356
      @sebeauhomevideo2356 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You mean: THE PEOPLE TAKING IT IN THE BACK
      XD

    • @farateq
      @farateq 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE WHO FELL ASLEEP

    • @eadaoinmalone503
      @eadaoinmalone503 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I don't think love is an option , I think its just there. I don't think you can just stop loving someone. You don't really have an option? I don't know...

  • @colleenmckibben4912
    @colleenmckibben4912 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6289

    Her saying “a different gender” instead of “the opposite gender” is such a small thing but it’s so wonderful to hear this kind of language be normalized

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +244

      Colleen McKibben Yes! Thank you for picking up on that. Gender is not binary, nor is bisexuality.

    • @nematoaddd
      @nematoaddd 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @Jake Dean nah

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +120

      Luise Naa I’ll thank you to take your transphobia elsewhere. It is not welcome here. To take your tired punchline to its conclusion, at least helicopters are allowed to serve in our military.

    • @QuiteLunnar
      @QuiteLunnar 5 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      @@ellanaa9464 While I do agree that Transphobia is not not believing in more than two genders, I disagree on your statement about Trans people not being allowed in the military. They aren't allowed because Trump didn't want them in the military.

    • @NickRyanBayon
      @NickRyanBayon 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      @Jake Dean I agree, genetically there are only 2 genders.

  • @stupendoushorrendous8258
    @stupendoushorrendous8258 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4894

    I laugh so hard when people call bisexuals confused. I've never been less confused. It was when I thought I was straight but was inexplicably attracted to men that I felt confused.

    • @Rage_Harder_Then_Relax
      @Rage_Harder_Then_Relax 4 ปีที่แล้ว +72

      LOL..so you actually WERE confused. You're confused about being confused.

    • @michaelregis1015
      @michaelregis1015 4 ปีที่แล้ว +81

      @@Rage_Harder_Then_Relax confusception

    • @kaimikalaniYT
      @kaimikalaniYT 4 ปีที่แล้ว +184

      I’m not confused about my bisexuality...I’m just confused as to why people question us

    • @victuz
      @victuz 4 ปีที่แล้ว +86

      @@kaimikalaniYT They generally don't believe bisexuality exists and that we are "one or the other".
      Or if they trust our statement, they still say we aren't loyal, or that we're promiscuous.

    • @flair6527
      @flair6527 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      I’m pan and I agree so much. I used to be bi and I was so confused.

  • @crystaleidson6042
    @crystaleidson6042 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3235

    "I picked a partner, not a side." WHOOO THIS

  • @Jaz______04
    @Jaz______04 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10281

    where are my closeted Bi's at? 💖💜💙

    • @-westman3619
      @-westman3619 5 ปีที่แล้ว +176

      @@MistyGedlinske I came out two days ago!

    • @justsomegirl3412
      @justsomegirl3412 5 ปีที่แล้ว +73

      I'm here!

    • @Smartie-tk8nq
      @Smartie-tk8nq 5 ปีที่แล้ว +328

      Bi daughter of christian parents✌️

    • @Jaz______04
      @Jaz______04 5 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      @@Smartie-tk8nq yup same

    • @morganlottering3072
      @morganlottering3072 5 ปีที่แล้ว +118

      Waddup my Bi's!! 👋👋🌈

  • @CandzeeKitu
    @CandzeeKitu 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5074

    If only everyone was as understanding as this women.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +79

      Candzee Kitu Thanks, Candzee. I hope you’re well.

    • @shgh2695
      @shgh2695 5 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      Misty Gedlinske I never though the actual person in the talk would respond lmao

    • @chloemorgan3632
      @chloemorgan3632 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@shgh2695 what do you mean by the clown emoticon?

    • @shgh2695
      @shgh2695 5 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      Chloe Morgan you are a clown

    • @sunflower3352
      @sunflower3352 5 ปีที่แล้ว +65

      Chloe Morgan “Hate doesn’t come from religion, it comes from fear.”

  • @rosiehillier4904
    @rosiehillier4904 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2912

    I’m bi, I’ve got a boyfriend, and yes. I picked him. Not because he’s a boy but because he’s what I was (am) looking for. I’m not more likely to cheat, I don’t need a girlfriend as a girl to be valid as an lgbt member. Thank you.

    • @terilynn7074
      @terilynn7074 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      not enough women into women out there huh girl

    • @madalitsomwanza2218
      @madalitsomwanza2218 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      PERIODT👏🏾

    • @amosp9411
      @amosp9411 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Take your meds man.
      _LOL!!_

    • @msc0505
      @msc0505 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      👏🏻

    • @desereeboyer7555
      @desereeboyer7555 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      PREACH

  • @kaileys6237
    @kaileys6237 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6623

    I’m closeted but I swear my recommendations know what’s up
    Edit: Nearly a year later from when I commenting this I’ve come out to friends
    💖💜💙 Happy pride you guys!
    EDIT: its 2021 so its now nearly 2 YEARS since I posted the original comment (I always get more engagement during pride month lol) and I have yet come out to family. Maybe youll hear from me again when I do because Ive been thinking of coming out to family ❤️🏳️‍🌈 FUTURE ME HEY HAVE YOU DONE IT I HOPE U HAVE
    edit: (3 years since the original post) MUHAHAHAHA YES I HAVE!!! SOME FAMILY KNOWS AND IT WAS VERY FUNNY BC THEY WERE ALL LIKE "YEAH I HAD A FEELING YOU WERE"

  • @oikawadorable1653
    @oikawadorable1653 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6378

    FINALLY someone who explains it in a correct way, and she didn't say that bisexuality is binary i love her

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +267

      oikawadorable Thank you! When teaching this concept to folks who stumble over “Bi means two,” I tell them that the “two” is same and different. Gender is absolutely a spectrum, not a binary. Individual attractions vary, but there is space for all within the scope of Bisexuality.

    • @oikawadorable1653
      @oikawadorable1653 5 ปีที่แล้ว +76

      @@MistyGedlinske yes! so many people can't understand that, even some bisexuals themselves. Anyways i really enjoyed your TEDtalk, thank you for giving us a voice

    • @lucaspaiva7450
      @lucaspaiva7450 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      I guess that I like you man

    • @c.v8838
      @c.v8838 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Misty Gedlinske you are a star

    • @carrie637
      @carrie637 5 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      You can also say that the two in reference are for binary and non binary people.

  • @ellie4300
    @ellie4300 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2170

    Shy, bi and ready to cry🥺💕

    • @CrescentPaws5000
      @CrescentPaws5000 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      Ellie u need a hug fellow bi 🤗🤗🤗🤗

    • @ruthizred9090
      @ruthizred9090 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      mood

    • @reagan3810
      @reagan3810 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      This really spoke to me

    • @mingling4377
      @mingling4377 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Ellie cry in my arms 💖

    • @cloudy_dragon_
      @cloudy_dragon_ 4 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      Here, queer, and ready to wipe tears.

  • @KnightlyScarlet
    @KnightlyScarlet 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2058

    Most annoying thing friends say when you say you're bi. "Wait. You're not attracted to me are you?!" No. What have I ever done to make you think that? Nothing. Yet one statement makes you think about me hitting on you? really?

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +151

      Knightly Scarlet Yep, there’s a lot of projected insecurity and arrogance in those kinds of comments.

    • @theminnesotawitch
      @theminnesotawitch 5 ปีที่แล้ว +97

      I'm happy because when I told a few friends they were like "oh, okay, cool." What a lovely thing to say ammiright haha

    • @shannonshaw5865
      @shannonshaw5865 4 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      This!! One of the reasons I'm really worried to tell some of my religious friends.

    • @themyofmy
      @themyofmy 4 ปีที่แล้ว +85

      i literally told a kid from school im bi and he pointed to some random girl and said "sO yOuRe AtTrAcTeD tO hEr????!!1!??"
      like
      no

    • @k8tebird
      @k8tebird 4 ปีที่แล้ว +59

      Right?! I think I'm more picky about who I'm attracted to than a lot of straight people.

  • @cyranguyen7714
    @cyranguyen7714 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1548

    Question is how did youtube know I was bi before I did

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +90

      Crazy Cat Lady Bi-Fi reception?

    • @itisakubrow6361
      @itisakubrow6361 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      It really isn't that weird, you don't have access to swaths of demographic data and a whole department of statisticians at your disposal.

    • @limonade2544
      @limonade2544 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Misty Gedlinske I CACKLED HAHAHA

    • @mingling4377
      @mingling4377 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      i wish i had the gaydar of YT

    • @july4376
      @july4376 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      buzzfeed knew before i did

  • @princembat
    @princembat 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2804

    im open about my orientation but the people in my walking life pretend its not there or that im just being ridiculous. i dont care about that though. thank you for this video, as a fellow bi.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      Max Winters You’re welcome. I’m glad you enjoyed it.

    • @JustEvelynAndArt
      @JustEvelynAndArt 5 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      This is so true, I feel the same way when people who don't know who I really am laughs it off as joke or simply ignore this about me

    • @RK-ep8qy
      @RK-ep8qy 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Max Winters open? Really? I never would have guessed you were bi, maybe you could make it a bit obvious and put it in your profile

    • @princembat
      @princembat 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@RK-ep8qy im sensing a hint of sarcasm :P

    • @RK-ep8qy
      @RK-ep8qy 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Max Winters 😆

  • @halloooo1duuuuu
    @halloooo1duuuuu 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2594

    she has such an amazing and beautiful voice! She should become an audiobook narrator or something. Also, she seems like such a wonderful person, I love her! Thank you for your talk!

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +69

      hallo Thank you! I’m so glad you enjoyed this.

    • @MrHarpette
      @MrHarpette 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@MistyGedlinske Well i wonder how well your voice carried in that auditorium, since in this vid i have the volume cranked up all the way and i still can't hear you well, i'm going to have to plug in the headphones to understand what you're saying.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Jerome Potts I’m sorry. That’s an issue for the sound technicians, and unfortunately outside my control. I sometimes have trouble with sound levels, too.

    • @elenadylgerova7917
      @elenadylgerova7917 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Saaaame, I love her voice

    • @adamaldonado739
      @adamaldonado739 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@MistyGedlinske I love your voice

  • @cr4shmycar118
    @cr4shmycar118 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1724

    As a bi teenager... thank you. Every word struck a chord with me. I’m in the middle of the coming out process and thankfully I haven’t had anyone react negatively, but I’m worried about what will happen if I’m publicly out.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +74

      Nightslash360 You’re welcome. I’m glad you enjoyed this Talk. 40-year-old Me was less scared than Teenage Me, but it was still a huge step. Take time if you need to, and I wish you all the best.

    • @serenityrose2594
      @serenityrose2594 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      ME TOO! Part of my family knows and some friends, but there are some people who I am just terrified to tell. I just keep hearing the "it's just a phase" repeating in my head, even if I know that its not.

    • @keithmahoney4390
      @keithmahoney4390 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I've always liked both sexes and I don't care what people think

    • @keithmahoney4390
      @keithmahoney4390 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Nightslash from reading your post I guess you're American ?󾓪

    • @flair6527
      @flair6527 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Keith Mahoney, No. Not both sexes. All sexes.

  • @WitchyCharlie
    @WitchyCharlie 5 ปีที่แล้ว +640

    “I fall in love with the soul before the body.” -Magnus Bane, Shadowhunters.

    • @sarakotevska5089
      @sarakotevska5089 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Cheree Porter awwee

    • @zynory
      @zynory 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      This might sound weird but this show has made me realise that i'm bi...

    • @laramalanquini3124
      @laramalanquini3124 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Okay maybe i wanna cry rn

    • @Inevitably_Invisible
      @Inevitably_Invisible 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      I’m so sad that the show ended!!! Part of me realizing I was bi was being attracted to Jace, Clary, Isabelle and Alec all at the same time 😩

    • @flynnbraithwaite4322
      @flynnbraithwaite4322 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I love him so much!!! Awwwww! He (his character) really really helped me to figure out who I was, and who I like!

  • @Just.Lindsey
    @Just.Lindsey 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1424

    “Isn’t it better to be invisible than to be demonized?...” 😩💔 I understand this all too well being a pastors kid!!

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +62

      Lindsey Ramirez I see you. I wish you all the best.

    • @louise4778
      @louise4778 5 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Stay strong💕

    • @elliejordan3233
      @elliejordan3233 5 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      I fully understand you with this, I too am a pastor's kid. We'll get through it though. We have each other to lean on when things get tough

    • @mello1159
      @mello1159 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      This hits home because my mom is a pastor too.

    • @tuttochiaramentechiaro
      @tuttochiaramentechiaro 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      I have to hide the fact that I am vegan because when people know they use to treat me very differently in comparison to when they didn't know yet. It feels so bad.

  • @Mariajosea27
    @Mariajosea27 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1865

    i fee invisible almost everyday and for the first time in 17 minutes i felt comprehended even it as just by a screen. Than you.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      María José You’re so welcome. I see you, and you are valid.

    • @MrAdryan1603
      @MrAdryan1603 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      That's awesome

    • @CosymoR
      @CosymoR 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      So let it help you 💪🏻

    • @claudiahuacasi6795
      @claudiahuacasi6795 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Me too

  • @JustEvelynAndArt
    @JustEvelynAndArt 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1426

    6:25 The fact that she said 'Bisexuals are indecisive' and 'going through a phase' really hits close to home because this is not only said to me by people who are straight but also those from the LGBTQ+ too. I mean yeah I get where your coming, but what I don't understand is why can't I love who I want to love if I accept who you want to love. Can't it be enough if I say I like both male and female the way you like them too? Am I not allowed to say that guys are cute while I am in a relationship with a girl? I know that LGBTQ+ is accepting but sometimes I still get negative hate from both sides of the spectrum

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +118

      TypicalBookworm: Eve You are allowed, and it is enough. Not because I said so, but because it’s true. You are whole and valid as you are.

    • @Dancestar1981
      @Dancestar1981 5 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      TypicalBookworm: Eve I think we need to adopt the ideas of the Ancient Greeks in love. There are so many different types of love.

    • @meerasingh2624
      @meerasingh2624 5 ปีที่แล้ว +64

      Whenever I say I’m bi my friends say that I’m not. That I just think someone of the opposite gender is attractive and that just because I think that, doesn’t mean I’m bi. I don’t understand why I can’t just be bi. Like I already feel like an imposter all of the time and doubt myself with everything which is why I didn’t know I had anxiety until now. I kept thinking I was making it up and it would pass. What if I just want a relationship with a guy or girl? Like why can’t I say that and people just be cool with that instead of saying I’m confused or asking me to prove it by stating how I feel when I look at a girl I think is attractive? It frustrates me that they feel the need to fight me on something I find true about myself. Sorry that was a lot to dump on the internet

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      Meera Singh Hi, Meera. I see you. You’re allowed to be bi, not that you need anybody’s permission. Sounds like they’re the ones who are confused.

    • @meerasingh2624
      @meerasingh2624 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Misty Gedlinske thank you ❤️ you made my night

  • @yellowst1494
    @yellowst1494 5 ปีที่แล้ว +504

    I love when she describes the difference between "privacy" and "secrecy". I couldnt quite put my finger on it but it's exactly the clarification i needed to hear

    • @wacey7455
      @wacey7455 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Same here. Have been thinking about this lately.

    • @Miss_NatashaO
      @Miss_NatashaO 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      I know it as well. Hearing her talk had calmed me down. Despite all that happens in my life, I'm gonna be OK.

  • @surya7930
    @surya7930 4 ปีที่แล้ว +241

    "Sometimes, it starts a little voice in your head that says: "I'm just going to stay quiet because isn't it better to stay invisible than to be demonized.I don't mind being mislabelled,if it means that I am not going to be seen defective or lesser".That voice, can get really, really loud.Please don't listen to it.That way lies self-hatred and it will eat you alive.It's not true, it's not fair and nobody deserves it."

    • @leonstrubbe9940
      @leonstrubbe9940 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      i've had this little voice in my head for a few months and let me say...that was the worst period in my life so far. so please never listen to it. I took a lot of big decisions and still have a long way to go by telling everyone that im bi.I even told my male crush i liked him which sadly was not received well,but you deserve love and will get it one day by finding a partner!

    • @hzjchuang7286
      @hzjchuang7286 17 วันที่ผ่านมา

      可是我已经受到了这样的声音的影响。我爱上的女生是个直的,她就在歧视我😢

  • @lord.have.myrcene
    @lord.have.myrcene 4 ปีที่แล้ว +265

    It's crazy that she put this invisible feeling into words

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Wren Lorraine I tried, anyway. I hope it helped you. Thanks for watching.

  • @HomoExDiamond
    @HomoExDiamond 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1194

    from the bottom of my heart, thank you for those words

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Julia H.E.D. You’re welcome.

    • @ch1vis
      @ch1vis 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Misty Gedlinske Thank You!!!

  • @DALICAHE92
    @DALICAHE92 5 ปีที่แล้ว +625

    My girlfriend sent me this. I have always tried and searched for ways so that she feels comfortable and safe. But most importantly seen, cause since we’re both women I don’t want her to feel mislabeled by me. So this is so useful and definitely helps me understand her and support her more. It was an amazing video

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Dalicahe I’m glad you enjoyed, and hope this helps you.

    • @BearclawsBranson
      @BearclawsBranson 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      My wife sent it to me and it really helped me, too

    • @360xssp
      @360xssp 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      my girlfriend also sent me a link to this video. This talk is so on point, I understand Bi's and their situation and thinking much better now. Thank you very much!!

    • @emilydickinson5033
      @emilydickinson5033 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I'm trying to work up the courage to send this to my gf so thank you for sharing your reaction... Have a lovely day :)

  • @milescarr8524
    @milescarr8524 4 ปีที่แล้ว +207

    I feel so bad. She’s so funny but no one is laughing and making awkward silence

    • @yunmis1300
      @yunmis1300 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      are you saying that she talking about being bi is a joke? i hope i got it wrong or else i'll be seriously disgusted. when she actually makes a joke people laugh so idk why you said that, she made jokes (i think) two times just so the speech wouldn't be so serious.

    • @norahgilbert1679
      @norahgilbert1679 4 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      SockyAnimatics I don’t think so... they’re pointing out the fact that it was a quiet crowd when she DID make jokes

    • @yunmis1300
      @yunmis1300 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@norahgilbert1679 but people did laugh at her jokes. i feel like the comment indeed was mockery.

    • @Ishaankaushal1
      @Ishaankaushal1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@yunmis1300 not really when compared to most ted talks

    • @anshnanavati
      @anshnanavati 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      @@yunmis1300 no, there were quite a few times when (I feel) she was attempting humour but it wasn't well-received by the audience.

  • @InventorZahran
    @InventorZahran 4 ปีที่แล้ว +204

    Despite being bi, I "straight-pass" almost everywhere to avoid judgement or discrimination...

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      InventorZahran 327 I understand that practice. I did too, for a very long time. All my best to you.

    • @unicorntomboy9736
      @unicorntomboy9736 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Same

    • @flaviasomarriba6555
      @flaviasomarriba6555 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      same, after 4 years, I began saying it to only a few people, some of them saying that "I can find a person of the same gender pretty, doesn't mean you are into them" and it really hurts how hard it is to be judged as if you are saying nonsense..

    • @karminyates3261
      @karminyates3261 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I know this was from a long time ago but there’s no such thing as being straight passing most people in the world are either assume to be straight or cis.

  • @futurestar2999
    @futurestar2999 5 ปีที่แล้ว +537

    This video just popped up in my recommended and damn, did I need to hear it. I feel like a stranger in my house after coming out to my mom who’s made me feel ashamed of who I am. Being bi is something I struggled with for years and when I finally got the courage to say it out loud, I told my BF who’s wonderful and loves me for me, but my mom just doesn’t seem to understand. I’ve been told by her not to tell my other family members because she doesn’t think it’s important. This video has opened my eyes. I don’t know when and I don’t know how, but telling my other family IS important and they deserve to know the version of me that makes me proud to be myself. ❤️

    • @redalpha2392
      @redalpha2392 5 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      My mom and dad said to me that I'm going through a phase... I almost broke down in tears.

    • @lightawake
      @lightawake 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@redalpha2392 I'm sorry to hear that...i truly feel that no one else has the right to try to tell you who you are or aren't - it's such disrespect at the most basic level and it's not okay to say. Hugs xx

    • @neigeepierrot4694
      @neigeepierrot4694 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Ellie Rutt same here I’m sorry your mom has not accepted you yet I hope she does soon good luck though

  • @mathewhart530
    @mathewhart530 5 ปีที่แล้ว +360

    Thank you for reminding me of the difference between privacy and secrecy

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Mathew Hart You’re welcome. I’m glad you enjoyed.

  • @feelsrestricted8322
    @feelsrestricted8322 5 ปีที่แล้ว +652

    Hello bi guys and gals, to avoid staying invisible to each other, wear the bi colors/flag on a piece of jewelry(like a bracelet). Lets make this trend popular, so we don’t necessarily need to scream attention to ourselves, but we can still identify each other as sources of strength (or even potential partners, haha).
    Comment on any other ideas.

    • @strawberrymarshmallow7370
      @strawberrymarshmallow7370 5 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      Honestly! I'm about ready to make a lil ring right now 😂

    • @dariarussu686
      @dariarussu686 5 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      Love this!! Had the same idea for years! We need more people to do that :))))

    • @Phoenix909TV
      @Phoenix909TV 5 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      Exactly what I thought of after seeing this video and reading on bi erasure on reddit for a few days. We need to be visible not only for ourselves but also to others to set the simple standard that we exist.

    • @jessf7341
      @jessf7341 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      *[FeelsRestricted]* Honestly that is a great idea

    • @chambergreece3914
      @chambergreece3914 5 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      But what if biphobic people get to know about this trend and start attacking us.

  • @jeffsanon13
    @jeffsanon13 4 ปีที่แล้ว +95

    💖💜💙 “Picked a partner, not a side.”

  • @bicthalis7740
    @bicthalis7740 5 ปีที่แล้ว +342

    invisi*BI*lity

  • @haleysadlemyer3228
    @haleysadlemyer3228 5 ปีที่แล้ว +130

    “There is no deadline or expiration date on your truth” 💕

    • @terilynn7074
      @terilynn7074 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      but a lot of people don't like your truth so you better get a man while you can

    • @aperson7421
      @aperson7421 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      The truth is that your "truth" isn't the truth

    • @mikedewalt697
      @mikedewalt697 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      God's Truth trumps over what people 'think' to be true. God's Truth vs. your 'truth'. You will lose that battle 100% of the time.

    • @Alina_Schmidt
      @Alina_Schmidt 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@mikedewalt697
      Oh dear, why do you project your own mistakes on normal people?

  • @mecchabaron64
    @mecchabaron64 4 ปีที่แล้ว +144

    I recently, at 21 years old came out as bi and I had no clue of the problems facing our community. It makes me want to bring everyone into a giant hug and let them know they are accepted for who they are

    • @niaranoctyrna3754
      @niaranoctyrna3754 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I am 20 years old and...probably going to be in the same boat soon

    • @sehabel
      @sehabel 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I'm 21 and I came out as trans and bi 2 months ago. It feels fantastic to finally be seen as the person I truly am, I've been depressed and suicidal for way too long.

  • @StoneSaysHello
    @StoneSaysHello 5 ปีที่แล้ว +122

    I thought I was straight till I was 22 because of all this. People kept telling me 'it didn't count' made out with a girl, nope, had a massive crush on my female friend, nope, ect.

  • @LilyJbeauty
    @LilyJbeauty 5 ปีที่แล้ว +305

    Some things you don’t even realize you’re struggling with, and your words made me feel okay and empowered. We exist and i strive to not be invisible anymore

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      lily jacqueline We absolutely exist! All the best to you.

  • @Just.Lindsey
    @Just.Lindsey 5 ปีที่แล้ว +94

    “The only person you’re obligated to save... is You.”

  • @jordansullivan5764
    @jordansullivan5764 5 ปีที่แล้ว +100

    "It can be really difficult to turn your powers off -- even if you really want to." As femme bi woman, it is soooo hard to get other women to notice you're hitting on them and not just being friendly.

    • @adiarbiv4613
      @adiarbiv4613 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Jordan Sullivan oof hi it’s true

    • @misakichan6723
      @misakichan6723 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Can you please explain what femme bi is?? I'm sorry I don't know but I'm very curious about it?

    • @theincredibleknuffibar4834
      @theincredibleknuffibar4834 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@misakichan6723 feminine Presenting bi women :)

  • @sebastianboeddinghaus3505
    @sebastianboeddinghaus3505 5 ปีที่แล้ว +557

    Bi people are the sweetest people you can ever meet, but we get the most hate from straight and LGBT+ people🤕😢. Also crikey this lady is very good and Imma go send this to all the people I'm out to who don't understand bisexuality.

    • @rosmarinlavendel1477
      @rosmarinlavendel1477 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Seb 713 thankyouuu.

    • @sebastianboeddinghaus3505
      @sebastianboeddinghaus3505 5 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      Rookielove1 Sure, but a lot of people don't think that bi people are serious in romantic pursuits, believing them to be confused, indesisive (English🎉) or just going through a phase. We call that erasion or biphobia and it's mean.
      Edit : just saw the family part, idk I can't speak for those people, I have never known anyone to want to date a family member.

    • @marieb.1810
      @marieb.1810 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Oh wow. I was at a straight country western bar and i got a crush on a girl there who looks VERY butch and after we fast danced she reached out to grab my hand. So i was drinking a bit to get my courage up to go up to her which i did like 4 times. Now there's this guy i knew from around town i've been chasing too. Gave him my ph number at least 3x and he never called. So he was at the bar too. I was telling him that i had a crush on K___ and gave her my ph number, but she never called me. I then said, "um , you never called me either. " I was like crushing on two different sexes at the same time! He took it all in stride when i said i liked that girl. I was asking him imfo about her and he was telling me. Anyway,, don't get drunk if you are bi cuz ya never know what you will say to people!

    • @Heyiya-if
      @Heyiya-if 4 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      Not dating a bi person on the basis just not being attracted or interested is fine. Not dating them on the basis of *them being bi*... is biphobia.

    • @xxalicegamingxx5077
      @xxalicegamingxx5077 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Heyiya-if
      No it’s not. Lmao! People don’t have to date bi people if they don’t want to. Why can’t bisexuals date bisexuals? Date your own people ffs instead of guilting other people into why they aren’t dating you.

  • @garveyful1
    @garveyful1 5 ปีที่แล้ว +438

    Stumbled across this and felt every word in my soul. Thank you for a beautifully spoken, intelligent and compassionate speech.
    ❤💜💙 🏳️‍🌈

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Amanda Garvey You’re quite welcome. I’m glad you enjoyed it.

  • @rararaex6990
    @rararaex6990 5 ปีที่แล้ว +476

    I wanted to say thank you for this talk. You are right about how heavy the invisibility burden is. It felt like a weight off my shoulders once everyone who mattered in my life knew about my bisexuality and I didn't realise just how much hiding my true self was affecting me until I came out. It's content like this that helped me at the time so i know there are people out there that have benefited from your courage to share your story. xx

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Rararae x Thank you so much!

    • @AM-fk7rp
      @AM-fk7rp 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Like 450 is me.

  • @lizzy1084
    @lizzy1084 4 ปีที่แล้ว +158

    “I picked a partner, not a side” - my heart feels free hearing someone say it for me.
    Not confused, not a phase, who i am.
    Thank you!

    • @mikedewalt697
      @mikedewalt697 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Who you are is a sinner who does not want to repent. I'm a sinner who repents. Now you know the big difference from a pagan and a Christian

    • @lizzy1084
      @lizzy1084 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      MIKE DEWALT what is wrong with you?!

    • @mikedewalt697
      @mikedewalt697 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@lizzy1084 Absolutely nothing.

    • @abby_v.v
      @abby_v.v 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      homophobes are rampant

  • @oliviahaglund8978
    @oliviahaglund8978 5 ปีที่แล้ว +122

    "Be visible first and foremost to yourself." Chills. This was really needed and really beautiful.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Olivia Haglund thanks, Olivia. I’m glad you enjoyed.

  • @qingruxu135
    @qingruxu135 4 ปีที่แล้ว +97

    Ah ok, lesson learnt. Bisexuals are superheroes.

    • @cherade99
      @cherade99 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Well we try!

    • @puffcatco
      @puffcatco 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      aww, You too :)

    • @updated_autopsy_report1
      @updated_autopsy_report1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      we are superheroes with super powers!

    • @F4wk3s
      @F4wk3s 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Nah, I use my invisibility to commit crimes

  • @graceless000
    @graceless000 5 ปีที่แล้ว +127

    “I picked a partner, not a side.”
    Yes!! Thank you!

  • @NelyMokay
    @NelyMokay 5 ปีที่แล้ว +216

    I really needed this. I repeatedly chose not to say anything we people assume I’m straight. But then would feel bad when I say I have a crush on someone (sometimes girls) and people assume I’m talking about a men. It feels like I’m not being honest but I’ve managed to convince myself that is not too important. It actually is. I guess is part of accepting myself for who I am.
    Thank you.

    • @elainerogers6337
      @elainerogers6337 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Im asexual and romantic and I hear my parents asking me if I have any crushes or if I like anyone. I am too scared to come out to them but I hope with time I can. I hope that your loved ones will except you ❤💚💜

    • @mikedewalt697
      @mikedewalt697 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      God is more important.

    • @yunmis1300
      @yunmis1300 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@mikedewalt697your comment made me puke just now ngl

    • @mikedewalt697
      @mikedewalt697 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@yunmis1300 Of course..because you are a weak thin-skinned person

    • @mcplumpkin6191
      @mcplumpkin6191 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@mikedewalt697 doesnt God hate the sin, but not the sinner?

  • @targetaudience0x
    @targetaudience0x 4 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    wow that final line - "the only person you're obligated to save is you" - brought tears to my eyes. What an articulate, amazing person.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Matil D Thank you so much. I’m glad you enjoyed.

  • @paulaaaii7442
    @paulaaaii7442 5 ปีที่แล้ว +60

    "The only person your obligated to save...is you" honestly I needed this

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Paula H I’m glad it was there for you.

    • @paulaaaii7442
      @paulaaaii7442 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@MistyGedlinske thank you for replying omg😍. I hope you know this ted ed gave me the spur of the moment courege to come out to my family as bi. It's been such a breath of fresh air, that I was forcing myself to drown out. So soooooo many thanks to you💛💛💛.

  • @benoncarsten396
    @benoncarsten396 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    48 years underwater.
    I began the painful process of surfacing a few months ago.
    Until now my wife was the only one who knew.
    Three days ago I had a hard conversation with my 22 year old daughter. Today my weight feels lighter.
    I’m an infant learning how to speak about what I have felt for decades. Thank you so much for giving me these words and this language.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      You’re so very welcome.

  • @betelgezaa
    @betelgezaa 4 ปีที่แล้ว +51

    She has a magic voice. Whatever she says I could listen to for hours ....she would be great in “voice therapy”.

  • @SashyGryphyth
    @SashyGryphyth 5 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    "Identity is not taboo." Throughout this video Misty hit nail after nail right on the head. It was impressively accurate.
    I couldn't pick a person based on something as gender, I need the right personality, and gender doesn't guarentee the right one.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      SashyGryphyth I’m glad this Talk spoke to you!

  • @francescabellan2313
    @francescabellan2313 5 ปีที่แล้ว +241

    Great talk! Clear, informative, compassionate... THANK YOU so much for this. As someone who's spent the last 12 years of her life trying to educate people on bisexuality (I co-run a blog, FB page and IG profile in Italian on bi-pan visibility), I can't praise you enough for bringing this subject to TED. So many people are still suffering from the consequences of bi invisibility and erasure. Will do my best to share this video as much as I can.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Francesca Bellan I’m honored! Thank you so much!

    • @sophiafried_
      @sophiafried_ 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      hey :) i would like to follow you, whats your blog called?

  • @arwenjoy8962
    @arwenjoy8962 5 ปีที่แล้ว +181

    This is such a good message ro here. I am 14 and Bi, luckily in my family, friend group and school are very accepting environments. But i have worried about how i will be accepted out in the world.

    • @Jig_Artist
      @Jig_Artist 5 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Arwen Joy If your friends and family accept you, that’s an excellent start. Be proud. When you are out in the world, the right type of people won’t even care.

    • @donniezawadski2047
      @donniezawadski2047 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Stick around people who love you for who you are
      Also hang with friends who inspire you !! Best of luck and don't worry. It's gonna be fine 🗽

    • @unicorntomboy9736
      @unicorntomboy9736 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      If they accept you, that's all that truly matters

  • @animeunknown8708
    @animeunknown8708 5 ปีที่แล้ว +92

    Her voice is so soothing

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Anime Unknown Thanks. My kids have a very different opinion!

    • @animeunknown8708
      @animeunknown8708 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      I need advice.

  • @emilylizotte9793
    @emilylizotte9793 4 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    I have never felt more acceptance and understanding towards my bisexuality than in this moment. Thank you.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Emily Lizotte You’re so very welcome.

  • @rovietergeek
    @rovietergeek 5 ปีที่แล้ว +146

    Thank you so much for making me realize how important it is to not let myself think that I am just confused. That I should acknowledge the fact that this is who I am. I am not just stuck in a phase, and that choosing to be with a person either of the opposite or same gender, does not nullify my bisexuality.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Rovieter Geek Thank you so much for your comment. I’m so glad you enjoyed the Talk. You are real and valid and absolutely enough.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Rovieter Geek Bisexuality also encompasses non-binary gender-nonconforming folks. You may hear otherwise but such things are not true.

    • @rovietergeek
      @rovietergeek 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Misty Gedlinske Actually in my current high school, we were asked to conduct researches of our own. I chose to make a research that focused on gender stereotyping and gender conformity. I wish I’d seen this sooner. It would have been a great contribution to the researcg

    • @sebastianboeddinghaus3505
      @sebastianboeddinghaus3505 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Rovieter Geek 💗💜💙

  • @CoachBess
    @CoachBess 4 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    The only person you’re obligated to save is “You”

  • @timothysmith7080
    @timothysmith7080 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    "If for right now you only feel comfortable or safe whispering the truth to yourself say it anyway."
    That is a very powerful statement.

  • @Vampirech1ck
    @Vampirech1ck 5 ปีที่แล้ว +194

    This is a good talk, meany things she is saying could easily apply to asexuality as well.
    That’s why gotta have each-others backs

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Vampirech1ck Agreed, and other commenters have made the same observation. Thanks for watching!

    • @kerchewy2571
      @kerchewy2571 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Bi ace solidarity!!!

    • @mikedewalt697
      @mikedewalt697 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      God don't have your back on this subject, so people can't help you with that.

    • @kerchewy2571
      @kerchewy2571 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      MIKE DEWALT not everyone believes in god mike.

    • @mikedewalt697
      @mikedewalt697 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@kerchewy2571 True, but its a dominate worldview, especially over atheism. I believe in God and so I will speak from my perspective based on my worldview. (raised by atheists btw).Plus I am exercising my 1st Amendment Rights, so there's that too.

  • @kialuvsyoo
    @kialuvsyoo 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    She made me cry at least 3 times in just 17 minutes. I feel shook. I feel seen. I feel understood. I feel encouraged. I feel loved.

  • @andslove88
    @andslove88 5 ปีที่แล้ว +173

    I'm so effing proud of my bisexuality 💙💜❤

    • @kingofhearts804
      @kingofhearts804 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      andslove88 hello , sorry to bug , but it’s pink , purple and blue

    • @unicorntomboy9736
      @unicorntomboy9736 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      We all should be.

  • @joey4283
    @joey4283 4 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    "And her fangirl crushes,y'all let me tell ya,on certain British celebrities can be seen from s p a c e"i feel ya girl. i feel ya

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Jellby Fish The purple shirt was an intentional choice 😉

  • @lugh8592
    @lugh8592 5 ปีที่แล้ว +72

    Finally, i started crying. Thank you so much. I feel understood for the first time EVER

  • @elixir6327
    @elixir6327 5 ปีที่แล้ว +71

    I’m glad someone chose to speak up about this. Everyone seems to get so caught up in the bigger picture of peace for LGBT+ people that they forget the erasure going on within their own community

    • @lauracabe
      @lauracabe 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Laoise 🙌🏻🔥🔥🔥

  • @IWishICouldThinkOfAGoodHandle
    @IWishICouldThinkOfAGoodHandle 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    She deserved the huge cheer she got at the end

  • @citrus8884
    @citrus8884 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    In the community people get so annoyed because apparently we have it easier. We are still LGBT, and it’s also hard for us. It’s not a competition to see who gets more backlash, it’s an opportunity to support each other.

    • @justsayin1756
      @justsayin1756 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      The statistics do not reflect that bisexuals have it easier

  • @tesseraph
    @tesseraph 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    Her style of communication was both captivating and calming and everything she had to say was spot on. One of the best TED talks I've seen in a long time!

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Topi Viljamaa Thanks! I’m glad you enjoyed it.

  • @hastaluegoluka
    @hastaluegoluka 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    this woman gives me hope. she is an example of what my future can be like. i will be able to marry the person i love and have a family with them, and i will be okay. this was so inspiring and i hope other baby bisexuals like me will feel validated and comforted by this video ❤️❤️❤️

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Elena Santin I’m glad it spoke to you. I wish you every good thing. Be well.

  • @ernie8430
    @ernie8430 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Her voice is so calming and comforting

  • @jeffwooliscroft6600
    @jeffwooliscroft6600 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I am so pleased I found this. It's such a relief to hear my own truth, the one I'm fighting to be open about, spoken aloud and with such apparent confidence. And, for the record, I have a lot more grey in my hair than Misty Gedlinske does.
    Thank you Misty, from the very bottom of my heart.

  • @tamara.mw.
    @tamara.mw. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    This has given me a lot of strength.
    Maybe I won't come out just yet, but I'm trying to slowly get rid of those voices you talked about which are so, so true.
    I feel like there's a bit of internalized biphobia in me that I so want to get rid of before telling anyone, and your words helped me immensely. Thank you ♥️

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Tamara W. You’re so very welcome. I still find unexpected bits of baggage to unpack. It’s a process, I think. I wish you the very best of everything along the way.

  • @decraziness
    @decraziness 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I haven't been able to tell my family. I'm not ashamed of who I am and yet it's still hard to say the words. Great talk. She has a really good narrating voice. She can totally voice an audiobook

  • @jenjen_oreo
    @jenjen_oreo 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    "The only person that you're obligated to save is you."
    Giving me chills when she said that. Truth in so many levels.

  • @pandispandilps7012
    @pandispandilps7012 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I had to stay hidden for years because “I was to young” I was eleven when I figured it out and I had two friends who also was bi.
    I know I was young but I had herd many times from adults that I was smarter than many other grownups that they met, and I had no problem saying something and they would take my seriously. But not with this. Why?
    ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜 💖💜💙

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Pandis & Pandi LPS I’m sorry that happened to you. It wasn’t right, and it wasn’t fair. I see you.

  • @abirdietoldme4102
    @abirdietoldme4102 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Finally, someone said it. Omission and reliance on other people's assumptions really hit home. And Erasure is very real.

  • @francescacappai2652
    @francescacappai2652 5 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    This might be a stretch, but she is wearing a PURPLE shirt. That might be something 😂

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Francesca Cappai It was an intentional choice. 😉

  • @sofitaylor725
    @sofitaylor725 5 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    It is so nice to finally be comprehended by someone, even if it’s just in my computer. I feel invisible every day and thanks to this for at least 17 minutes I didn’t feel invisible. You are an incredible person and I hope there are more people like you out there 💕💕

    • @CrescentPaws5000
      @CrescentPaws5000 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sofi Taylor it’s ok 🍞🍫🍞🍌🤗🤗🤗

  • @macarooni4023
    @macarooni4023 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I just wanted to say her voice is really calming like she could read me a bedtime story to sleep.

  • @soph7066
    @soph7066 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    “ the only person your obligated to save, is you” iconic

  • @JaShleylover17
    @JaShleylover17 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Dang. Who would've though Ted Talks will be this emotional? Great video, thank you so much ❤💙💜

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      JaShleylover17 You’re welcome. I’m glad you enjoyed

  • @maryamelb4918
    @maryamelb4918 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Her voice is so nice to hear. I could listen to her all day speaking.

  • @Marshmallow95506
    @Marshmallow95506 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    This is one of those really important messages! I’m open about myself, but I’ve seen friends hurt by hiding. This is amazingly said!

  • @donniedarkorequiem22
    @donniedarkorequiem22 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I’m crying. This is the logic I’ve been trying to articulate for years. She nailed it.

  • @aster5600
    @aster5600 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I'm crying from feeling so understood. Sending hugs from the closet.

  • @ericrush3495
    @ericrush3495 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I have felt such peace since I accepted that I was bi and came out to my family. I love this

  • @jiska8851
    @jiska8851 5 ปีที่แล้ว +52

    Omg you touched on exactly the right points loved this vid 👏😍 but what shocked me the most was the given data 😣

  • @Sander_los
    @Sander_los 5 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    What she is saying is so powerful, and no one could of said it better! Thank you so much for these words

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Sander Los You’re welcome. I’m glad you enjoyed it.

  • @noelle3780
    @noelle3780 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    You have no idea how deeply I wish this woman was my mother

  • @andreaj.phillip8007
    @andreaj.phillip8007 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I loved this, and felt this with every fiber of my being. I chose a partner, not a side, and doing so does not negate my identity in the least. She explained this so perfectly. I wish I had this video on hand whenever someone questioned me or disrespected me because of my orientation.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Andrea J. Riettie I’m glad you enjoyed this. Share it with whomever needs to see it with my compliments. You’re entirely valid and enough just as you are.

  • @LancelotGraal
    @LancelotGraal 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    6 minutes in, I already love this woman, I can related to absolutely everything she's saying and I'm so incredibly grateful she's saying it on a stage and on TH-cam. I really feel like crying. Of joy.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      LancelotGraal There is a section where I was trying really hard not to cry myself. I’m glad you enjoyed.

  • @jennifers550
    @jennifers550 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    This is a beautiful speech. It lovely and uplifting. That said, I keep my orientation quiet without any self hatred. I am not ashamed of who I am at all, it just makes sense to protect your privacy and your family from the dangers of ignorance and hatred.

  • @alicewest9696
    @alicewest9696 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    ok but she looks and sounds like that once in a lifetime likable english teacher

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I’m good with that assessment! I had some English teachers and Literature professors like that. All my best to you, Alice.

    • @jacobs1264
      @jacobs1264 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Misty Gedlinske I love how you still come to check the comments it’s amazing NV

    • @mysmirandam.6618
      @mysmirandam.6618 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yep the one who really cares

  • @jaikasch4565
    @jaikasch4565 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    This made me genuinely tear up. Exactly what I needed to hear!

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I’m glad it was there for you. Thanks for watching.

  • @angelenapulis9083
    @angelenapulis9083 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    That last line made me tear up. Thank you, Misty. This is amazingly helpful.

  • @gek421
    @gek421 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    God, I needed to hear this TED talk. This makes sense of the feelings I've had and forms the words that I've had so much difficulty in trying to find when sharing my truth to trusted friends and family. I love the distinction she makes between private and secret.

  • @soumiu.8264
    @soumiu.8264 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Her words made me literally start sobbing. She’s so powerful with her word.

  • @alyssaolson7964
    @alyssaolson7964 5 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    I'm pansexual, and I totally get this, too. When I was in seventh grade, I had my first crush on a girl. I knew what it was to some degree, but I kept fighting it because I didn't even know pansexuality or bisexuality existed, and I thought I was straight (since I'd had a few crushes on guys, including one I'd just gotten over a couple months ago). The only reason I knew bisexuality existed was a DeviantArt profile I'd seen a while ago that I thankfully remembered (after *hours* of not paying attention in math class because I was too busy worrying about this stuff). When I thought of that was such a relief, because in that moment I knew I wasn't defective.
    I looked up other sexualities when I got home, so that I could be more aware of all the different sexualities and could make sure I found a label that fit me (pansexual, if you've forgotten).

    • @lilytehrani6243
      @lilytehrani6243 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I wanted to keep reading that - you'd make a great writer (soz for the random comment)

  • @alexsmit5430
    @alexsmit5430 5 ปีที่แล้ว +74

    Thank you, this message is great, I needed to hear this.

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Alex Smit You’re welcome. I hope it helped.

  • @ginaa4448
    @ginaa4448 5 ปีที่แล้ว +116

    isexuality
    The B is invisible

    • @MistyGedlinske
      @MistyGedlinske 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Gina a Gosh, you’re clever.

    • @AnnieDHarpie
      @AnnieDHarpie 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Now brought to you by Apple

    • @Hello-rw2th
      @Hello-rw2th 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Lemme just fix that...
      ISexuality
      The new invention y Apple
      Sleek new design and eauty
      Without the second letter of the alphaet
      *Revolutionary device*

    • @avatarlhamo3063
      @avatarlhamo3063 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@Hello-rw2th I wish you had more likes my friend

    • @Hello-rw2th
      @Hello-rw2th 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Avatar Lhamo
      ‘Y removing a letter from our devices, we hope to accomplish something no one has accomplished efore- creating a eautiful, easy-to-use, compact piece of technology.’
      -CEO of eauty, Apple.
      ‘We put special attention to the compactness of this device. That’s right- we have effectively removed a letter from the alphaet. No one has ever seen something like this done efore- we hope to move humanity forward from here on out.’
      -Chairman of alphaet, Apple.

  • @jennifermcdonald4917
    @jennifermcdonald4917 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Cannot put into words how much I love this! She is so on point with so many issues. I experience a lot of those issues myself. Power through powerful Bi's!