Jurassic Park explained by an idiot
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 เม.ย. 2020
- Patreon: / highboi
Don't have time to see this movie?
That's fine i gotchu bruh here's a recap.
Already saw it but forgot some of and too lazy to watch it all again?
That's fine i gotchu bruh here's a recap.
Just saw the movie but wanna see some youtube videos about it?
That's fine i gotchu bruh here's a recap.
welcome to the world's best worst recaps.
Enjoy.
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#JurassicPark #HighBoi #MovieRecap - ตลก
So I wanted to know how what 5T's out of 7 rex's actually is. So after doing a little research I found out that “Tyrannosaurus” is Greek for “tyrant lizard,”. and REX means king. so how do w turn these two into numbers? since king is the highest possition possible in the animal kingdom i'll give REX's a 10, so 7 REX's are 70. Tyrant is a from of ruler tha is evil, but a lizard ranks lower in the animal kingdom after a mass genocide made by a floating potato shaped rock and some volcano's. So they get 7.
so that means he rates jurrasic parks rates 35/70, wich means that this movie gets a score of 50%.
calculations and research done by a dumbbass that is procrastinating on his study's for his exams
what the fuck did I just read
@@2kmichaeljordan438 a dumbasss answer
@@mytino27 you misspelt beautiful
Can you find out what one pokeball out of one gooberball is
67⁵I ⁷⁷⁷777⅞7⁷7⅞7⁷67⁷⁷⁷and ⅞the ⁵5⁶55555⁵
To who ever liked this comment I'd like to say I typed this accidentally when it was in my pocket
Fun fact: That mosquito in the sap is actually an elephant mosquito, the only kind which can't suck blood. Sooooo that mosquito is not the reason those dinosaurs exist.
Do they eat sap lol
@@wugglesx still doesn't explain the dinosaurs
@@CrimsonClowd eh a movie is a movie in their universe the mosquito sucks blood who knows
It’s a vampire!
Eh no, that's another species in the movie than from an elephant mosquito.
"Man scream, end scene. "
"Next scene lawyer on wood."
That killed me instant sub
Same, I fucking died
lmao same
@Wandering_Moon Comment funni. Me laugh
SAUL GOODMAN IS THAT YOU
5:55 love that top gear scream.
As a Jurassic Park fan, this is not an "explained by an idiot", this is actually true
Pretty much
Not the part about Nedry being Hammond's son. Swing and a miss right there.
@@beantown_billy2405 yes
@@beantown_billy2405 he actually got many things wrong lol idk what the original commenter is talking about
For some reason I couldn’t stop laughing at “Hammond you blithering idiot”
Jeremy Clarkson!
You’ve reversed into the tyrannosaur paddock!
It was the transgender dinosaurs part for me.
And you most likely repeated it didnt you
"As you can imagine, I've done this properly."
_smash cut to jeep upside down in the mud_
Red means danger which means on, and green means off meaning it's safe. Very common throughout any industrial setting.
Oohk thanks for the info
That part where you added the "Very quietly too" bit about the rex is actually... realistic.
Yes, they are bloody massive but they are predators, it would be no use if your prey could hear you from across the continent because you can't stop stomping louder than a 600 pound walmart whale
Akschually, they like the birds in westerns circling the soon to be dead guy, the fuck are they called again? Anyways they like those. Doesn’t matter if ya hear em cause ya too weak to run away. Also why they so big. You and your fellow buddy dinosaurs finally kill a big fucker and are livin the life, boom Rex stomps in, and what you gonna do? Run away cause ya don’t wanna die and he then gets to eat your food.
600 pound Walmart bewildabeast
I mean, it would have claws no? They would clack against the floor
@@Antboi4653 No actually. Unlike dogs they can prevent that happening.
That and you know, soft forest floors don't clack with claws
@lucasgamezz140 yeah not in the wild lol. I was talking about the scene where they are on a hard floor in a building
The stick checking the electric fence is even moreso comical if you've ever actually been near an electric fence. You can hear the electric flowing through the fence wire. I'd imagine if you can hear a cow fence from a few feet away, a dino fence would likely sound waaay more intense! 😂
Yeah man, even just walking under powerlines sometimes. I live in a pretty rural part of the country and I'll often go for runs on the back roads because there's hardly any cars to worry about. Several roads have high voltage electrical lines overhead, and it's a very clear sound in the silence of the middle of nowhere.
Hearing a fence, and not hearing a fence, are two completely different things. When you hear it, you know for a fact that something is happening. If you hear nothing, your brain just doesn’t fucken know. Logic doesn’t matter in that case. No matter what, your brain is telling you “danger!”, and you will perceive danger.
*Bzzzzzzzzzz*
-some power line
It's a sound that I can't picture in my head, but when I hear it I know exactly what it is.
They had the balls to kill off Sam Jackson OFF CAMERA
They wanted to do it on camera, but a fucking hurricane destroyed the sets.
@@MadMikeRyan. Yes, it's a shame because it's a pretty cool part in the book.
@@MadMikeRyan. I didn't know that.
They couldn't get the bad assery and all the mother fuckers past the censors lol
Even though I know it's cause of the sets being destroyed by a hurricane
@@owie4070 I didn't know until i watched the kill count
Idk if you meant it as a joke, but just want to clarify that Nedry is not Hammond son. He calls him "dad" sarcastically for being patronizing.
This genuinely confused me as a child
@@Empororscorpion1 yeah me too
I wanted to say that too
Ok so I wasn’t crazy. I thought I went my whole life watching this movie AND reading the book without realizing they were related. Thank you for saving my brain from an aneurysm.
@@tommybagelboy7761 Nope you are not crazy
This dude isn’t an idiot he literally explains every plot hole
7:31 Electricity make wire hot, wood touch wire, wood get hot, wood is near air, wood catches on fire if electricity is there.
"Hammond you blithering idiot"
A touch couldn't be any more perfect 👌😂😂😂😂😂
5:55 for repeat
@@historytank5673 5:55 actually
@@Random-yh9tj lol thank you
0:50 was that clarkson XD
5:54 yup clarkson it is XD
Perhaps
Yes
0:42 its actually really smart idea
These are actually some of the highest quality reviews on the platform. You're doing well man
Yes
This is not a review tho wtf?
@@maxmustermann1533 you mad bro?
Well high definitly
Yeah
when you throw a stick at an electric fence it makes a certain sound when it hits the wire. Source: I grew up on a farm in Indiana and had 4 bulls
You can also get clotheslined off a four wheeler by an electric fence in indiana to test it.
@@Jeremiah71603 Speaking from experience i assume? Seems like the best way to test it.
@@Austin.-_- Yep, works best when you dont expect it
Hello fellow Hoosier! What part of Indiana did you grow up in?
@@thomasvlaskampiii6850 Kentukiana (Scott County)
5:18 I love the way he says "dino BOOOOOOIIIIIIIIIIIIII"
i like how this guy talks about the movie. he explains it so much better than any other explanation channel but he adds the dumbest jokes to make it easier to understand
"They accidentally created Transgender dinosaurs"
*bass boosted life finds a way speech*
i am the 69th like of this comment, and for some strange reason that makes me feel like the chosen one...
@@sayreeaton6741 pog
TOO TRUE
but not really.these dinos really changed their gender.people are just pretending and cannot give birth.
In Jurassic world they make Pansexual dinosaurs.:O
So I work with electricity for work and I can tell you there's an arguably worse reason why he shouldn't have tested the fence the way he did and that is because by putting both hands on the fence he created a path for the electricity to travel right through his heart. (Same with the boy who was climbing it but whatever) also yes when it comes to high powered circuits green means off and red means on.
Is the testing live wires by touching them with the back of your hand shit also true or nah?
@@shivangswain na I usually lick them and if they're spicy it's a no go.
Seriously tho, don't touch wires if you think they might be live. We have a tool that will tell us if there's power. We always test with it before touching any wire
Yeah but I don't think the boy should have been electrocuted since there's no path to the ground via him, no? Same with birds that sit on an electric wire.
@@Marcus12813 it really depends on the type of metal and the voltage of the fence. If the metal was lest conductive or carried more resistance than his body then the electricity would have taken the easiest path(through him) tho that's unlikely. Also if the voltage was high enough it could arc through his body to the ground but you're right i really doubt he would have gotten shocked like that
7:57 i love how proud he is that he read that on the internet
Fun fact: The sound of the velociraptors used to communicate in Jurassic Park was actually the sound of tortoises mating. Falling somewhere between a bark, a honk, and a sneeze, the sound can be clearly heard during Jurassic Park's iconic kitchen scene, just after the first raptor comes through the door.
Now I'm picturing a 6 foot tall tortoise coming through the door, rearing up on its hind legs, and letting out its mating cry as the hunt begins. Infinitely more terrifying.
One problem: Grant was not defending his ego. He was basically telling the kid not to laugh at fucking nature. Because nature fucking wins
Yeah it was the opposite, he was trying to kick a kid's ego down to a more sensible level.
@@Rexhunterj It's okay - the beauty of sarcasm is you can say one thing while meaning something else entirely and then tell everyone you meant the first thing anyway because Sarcasm!
ur gay
leave the man alone it says in his name he's high
Damn nature! You scary!
For the "green means off and red means on" bit, thats actually how it is woth most industrial electrical controls. Im an oilfield electrician, and at least for what i work on, the green light means it is safe to work on (as long as its locked out at least) and red means unsafe
that makes sense! did it take some time to get used to tho?
@@Apostate_ofmind Just a day or two, when youre looking at a wall of control units and you see hundreds of them all lined up and labeled properly it just kinda clicks
and yellow means speed up?
@@brunor.2895 sometimes, but yellow is usually an auxiliary light that is labeled and means whatever the customer wants. Same thing with blue
but these are systems that control the dinos getting out. so green meaning its safe to work on...when the dinos can get out.....i mean yeah the thing is safe to work on but what about that t-rex standing next to it?
1 year late but, the reason at 8:22 why red means on and green means off is, that green means it’s safe to touch the electric systems.
The same applies for our fuses actually, where red means the circuit is life and green means it’s off
6:01 ah yes. The long-neck-o-saures
Land bedore time moment
I like how you include those little stupid things, like seeing the island on the wrong side of the chopper or with the switches where green means off and red means on
EDIT: Guys you can stop commenting, 20+ people have made it clear already, i do now get that green stands for safe and that red means danger.
Yeah i like nit picking shit
High Boi You never mentioned how we never know how many people got off and how many died and how Hammond knows ppl are dying without seeing any actual dead people
Honestly the red and green kind of makes sense, though, because green means "fence won't fucking kill you if you touch it".
Also teh fact the dilophosaurus is basically super speed, But not rlly Its actually TWO dilos
Green being off and red being on actually makes more sense for electric fences. Universally green means go, red means stop. So an electric fence that is on is going to stop things, one that is off will allow things to pass through it, or you can think of it this way: Is it safe to touch or work on the electric fence? The green light for off means go ahead, the red light means no and to stop before you get hurt.
"And then he showed them a powerpoint presentations, about beans"
I understood that reference
Fairbairn Films reference?
@@misterdragon3894 yeah
Yee
2:08
Funny thing is: Hammond was like „nah I don’t wanna kill the Dino’s on this island“ but at the end of the book the whole island gets effing nuked 😭😭
7:45 You also aren't supposed to do it with both hands because if it was live then the shock would go through his heart killing him instantly. If he did it using only one hand then his hand may be messed up but the rest of his body is fine
1:48 This was probably done one purpose as all dinosaurs on the island were female and ‘life,uh, finds a way’ just like her doing up the seatbelt with two female ends.
Lesbian dinosaurs
Hammond put chemicals in the water that turned the Frickin Dinos Gay
@@barrettcarpenter1745 l e s b i a n d i n o s
That were standard plane belts that did not look like stuff used in car... there is no male and female part of the conector, you need to use brain and it is not very hard, but if you are panicking at that moment then it might be hard.
@@hallway_revenant7919 D O Y O U U N D E R S T A N D T H A T
I cracked up when he said “what the hell is he looking at?” When they first saw the island
Man I lost it when I saw the eggs. I just started giggling and shouted LESBIAN DINOSAURS it was so dumb.
@@hallway_revenant7919 i always wodnered why they used that frog idea, while some reptiles already can make eggs (including male eggs) without a male, because the chromosome system birds and reptiles have is different from mammals
@@ElysiaWhitemoonOmega The frogs were from the book, but there they used such a wide variety of species the geneticist actually had to look up to see if they'd used any frogs. There's also a bit more detail on how they managed to miss something as blatantly obvious as the dinosaurs breeding.
@@angrymokyuu1951 i know, i read the books, but only the frogs changed gender, why didnt crighton just used the reptile idea that can already lay eggs of the other sex without males, like komodo dragon, would be alot easier to explain and more realistic as reptiles are closer to dinosaur/birds than frogs, both use the YZ and ZZ system
3:53 that's how the plot in Adult movies work 😂😂
2:44 Hammond Is a liar because of site B bringing dinos to isla nublar
Random little science bit: Sap doesn't become amber, resin does. Sap is like tree blood, resin is like a tree scab. While scabs have blood, they're caused by some nasty pus stuff, and the blood often mixes in. Sap is really fluid, while resin is like super thick honey to begin with and quickly solidifies, and keeps doing that with time. Sap just... doesn't do that. It fades away.
This isn't to say bugs haven't been found in amber, but it isn't sap as depicted in the video within the movie.
Yep and the jurassic park novels written by Michael Chrichton actually pad out the excuse of the amber being rare by saying they also were able to locate fossils with some remaining DNA where the marrow would have been and stitched it all together to make the rough blueprints of what they ended up engineering with frog DNA to fill the gaps. The amber preserved mosquitos were just a potential source of more DNA than bones are, though rarer.
Being 'believable' was the book's forte, the movies are all fantastical rather than believable. (even then the books had to stretch your imagination for some things)
You mean tree jizz
@@Vomit326 no that is pollen
No this is pollen th-cam.com/video/fcZXfoB2f70/w-d-xo.html
@@Vomit326 my bad so true. Everyone should click the link and learn it.
" Hammond you blithering idiot!"... My god I can't believe how many people are ignoring the reference!
Speed And Power
You've reversed into the sports lorry!!!
It’s nice that Jurassic park spends at least 5 minutes of our time to explain their movie science.
Movies need to run for longer than 2.5 hours
If he looked good at the scene around 8:39 whit the hide and seek he could have seen a hand from behind the stage giving the raptor a little push.
"HAMMOND !"
-Jeremy Clarkson
CLARKSOOOOOON
CLARKSON YOU INFANTILE PILLOCK!
-James May
HAMMOND YOU IDIOT!
- Clarkson
HAMMOND YOU BLITHERING IDIOT
HAMMONDDDD YOU'VE REVERSED INTO THE SPORTS LORRY
I’m still debating if he is actually high or not
His eyes are red so it’s most likely
@StarkBytes the guy did a q&a so many people asked and he read and skipped over it so we will never have a answer
i dont think so. im like this not only from time to time too, and im never high, because i dont do drugs.
HE IS HIGH!!!
He's just built different
2:51 according to the second book that's cap.
4:02 great
me: *likes a movie in general*
High Boi: No, this isn't how your supposed to play the game
Saaaaaaaneessss
@@mcpuff8844 daaaaaaaaaance
8:48 Grant leaves the shotgun behind because it was “stovepiped;” it was jammed because a spent shell wasn’t ejected fully. Happens when a semi-automatic shotgun uses shitty ammo. He dropped it because he didn’t have time to clear the shell from the bolt.
What was he doing that was so much better than clearing the weapon he was using to defend himself? I'd be racking that bitch like my life depended on it. Because it did!
@@1pcfred this
@@1pcfred
The fact that he fired at least four shots and clearly missed all of them (we see in the sequel that dino skin is thin enough for tranquilizer darts) tells me that the shotgun was useless either way lmao
@@hanburgundy4317 useless or not it was his only play.
He also isn’t proficient with it, and a shotgun can be an intimidating weapon for anyone without experience shooting.
the dinosaur picture at 0:18 is sooo funny
yeee
YEE
Y E E
Ah, my childhood.
My mom was always disgusted by it, and was wondering why i was even enjoying so much gore.
Whenever i said "Lets watch Jurassic Park! (meant world, but i was too used to park)" my mom would be like "No, not allowed, it's so disgusting. Why do you like these?"
*i still got to watch it anyways :)*
found your video via reddit, watched the whole thing and enjoyed it... keep it up!
Thanks man!
Bruh an og
That is the most normal reply from you I have ever heard
I knew he would put that sound effect in when he introduced hammond
what's that sound effect from? I can't find :(
oh ok I found it, it's from bottom gear
@@Penguin-1966 Actually It's from Top Gear or The Grand Tour, Bottom gear is just meme version of it
@@egg0534 No Bottom Gear is official, the creators actually said that the reason it is named Bottom Gear is because the show originally aired in Britain and out of respect for the queen they named it Bottom Gear because Bottom Gear starts with B and so does Britain
@@Penguin-1966 I seriously hope you're joking
But even if somehow you aren't, I'm a huge fan of Clarkson Hammond and May and I know that Bottom is just a meme. So no
4:38 *eheheh! you forgott the magic woord!*
The fact that high boi watches/knows fairbairn films is not too surprising but very enjoyable and unexpected.
i scrolled way to far to find this comment lmao
Welcome to jurassic BARK 0:01
YES
2:11 love the fairbairn clip reference !
when i watch ur vids it makes me rethink everything
YES!!! I love the Clarkson yell!!!!! I immediately liked and subscribed!!!!
2:02 I loved the way he said dinosaurs for some reason
You know what? In real life, the dinosaurs are died out because the meteorite hits it up
“So they can finally buy jug” been playing a lot of zombies recently, this was gold 😂
Yes tis epic gold
Now real talk call or mob
@@rapterslayer you just asked a person who’s favorite map of all time is mob so I’m going with mob lol
@@q1uma i like both
@@rapterslayer fair enough
1:48 bruh two female ends of the seat belts
That's the quality content I've been missing.
Dennis Nedry isn’t Hammond’s son, he just said that because John was talking to him like a parent. Just letting you know.
@@crypticrhea2410 neither in the book nor in the movie is such thing said.
@@spearnfang4667 wait theres a book!?
@@Totally_not_a_Zaku yeah... this movie is based on a book written by Michael Crichton, so is the second movie
@@Totally_not_a_Zaku Two actually and they are nothing like the movies. In fact they are even more like a horror story and pretty graphic. The characters are quite different too but saying more I think it would be spoilers
@@joaopires3917 wait theres a movie based on the book?
referring to Alan Grant as Dino Boy feels weird but also stupidly funny. edit: I can't stop thinking about Dino Bites.
dino boiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i saw he thumbnail and was just waiting to hear clarckson yelling. Best of the vid
You parodied my favourite movie ever and you still made it hilarious
Oh by the way the scene where the t-Rex goes through the sunroof was actually a malfunction because of the rain the robot wasn’t supposed to go through the roof just look through the kids screams were real human terror and not acting
the director decided to keep it because children terror is funny
I never knew that that’s pretty weird for the director to keep that in
What it was a realistic reaction. Directors do that all the time unless someone dies in the shot.
I’ve heard this claim so many times and I just don’t believe it. Even if the Dino really went through on accident the reaction shot of the kids wouldn’t be from that same take. Just a basic knowledge of film making tells you this is likely bogus.
cgi dipshit
this man can make every movie look like a boliwood production
well....its 1:20 in the moring...and I usually get nightmares from Jurassic Park, especially the kitchen scene, I hope I'm not the only one who gets these nightmares......
4:13 "First Things First Stuff"
“So they can finally buy jug” 😂
Also she looked like she was trying to turn on the power first. Like you would in a zombies match.
1:38 THis is BIG brain time!
0:36 Is that Donnie Darko?!
Boiiiiiii and Choppa at the end really got me😂
Is no one going to talk about the fact that he watched a Fairbairn Films video at 2:11?
Well those power points are some of the best skits
Ikr
8:25 I had the same reaction the first time I saw this kind of thing...
Green means SAFE and Red means DANGER. Yes, this is the standard use in industry on electric grids.
The top gear parts had me rollin' 😂
I lovehate you so much for the smartassery that goes into this video. Subscribed.
4:34 While the scene doesn't do a good job of conveying this fact (the novel did) There are multiple dilophosaurs in the park, so while one of them was distracting Nedry, another had already climbed into his car to ambush him. The part that should be hard to believe is that a primitive predator like dilophosaurus would be able to critically think and come to a conclusion that the big meat sack would return to the vehicle, rather than run away.
In the novels the raptors are explained as being hyper intelligent hunters who also kill for sport/pleasure like some modern predators (and humans) do today, which explains why they go around and murder all the humans.
Oh yea in the novel I’m pretty sure that a 10 foot tall dilophosaur rips his head off and disimbowls him
Jurassic Park book is closer to a horror story than a dangerous adventure like the movie is
7:17
Oh, so THAT'S where Mace Windu's hand went.
I can't 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Its 3 am where i live, ideal time for a new video
I don't know why this making me cry and laugh at the same time? 😂😂 😂
I've really been enjoying watching this series while eating, thats like a top tier rating
HAMMONDDDDDD YOU'VE REVERSED INTO THE SPORTS LORRY
Wow congrats on 1 mil I was a sub since 100k
this dude makes everything funny
All these little things he notices, but he doesn't notice that the cars are already there, yet in the next scene they are shown driving in reverse to the people! 1:53
The HAMMOND! killed me
6:11 fun fact those eggs where the big one's eggs how do we know, the footprints plus the 1994 isla nublar clean up
This narration is top notch. I love it
Nedry isn’t Hammond’s son?
Calling him “dad” was just sarcastic!
That spas wasn’t even that badly jammed like wtf
He is the Dino Boy, not the Gun Boy I suppose.
@@Tutisclutis diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnoooooo booooooooooooooiiiiiiii
i love how he includes top gear memes in this XD
1:32 chaotician CHAOTICIAN
(Is that how you spell it)
Love your vid! at 3:44 Nedry is a son-like figure to Hammond, not his actual son, Just thought i would point that out
i love how he still likes the comments on his videos even a year after posting!! We gotta give high boi the praise he deserves!!
I think I just found a new TH-camr I like. I can't stop laughing at these 🤣🤣🤣. Well done 👍
This guy is top notch comedy for no reason.
5:07 when i was little i watched this scene and got terrified to the point where i couldnt watch the rest. What a nice childhood :)
That was always my favorite part when I was little, but then again, my Grandpa and I always rooted for the dinosaurs.
Movie logic at a time when dinos were related to reptiles: Use amphibian DNA to fill in cracks.
Movie logic at a time when dinos are related to birds: Use cuttlefish DNA to fill in cracks while trying to play god.
Actual logic: They fail miserably because it took over 400 tries to successfully clone a sheep. We must be close to Thanos Time Stoning extinction.
New movie releases:
Normal pps :watch online,theater, downloads
Highbois:on high boi
that fairburn films reference is solid gold