Emotional Neglect and the Lure of Unavailable People (4-Video Compilation)
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ก.พ. 2024
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Growing up without adequate time and care from parents is a form of trauma. In adulthood, it can leave you prone to choosing partners who ALSO starve you for love and attention. Whether you're fallen for someone who can't love you properly, or who is completely unavailable, your attachment to people who can't love you back will keep you stuck in grief, longing and isolation. In this 4-video compilation, I share four of my most popular responses to viewers' letters, coaching them to heal the attachment wound that keeps retraumatizing them.
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I recently found your channel and I’m equally amazed and grateful for the quality content you are providing thank you for everything you do 🙏🏻
Thank you for being a part of our community here!
Nika@TeamFairy
Bookmarking 😮 why have I never heard that when this has happened to me with my ex
@@CrappyChildhoodFairy🎉😂😂😂😂😂u😂😂😂🎉🎉😂😂🎉😂🎉😂😂😂😂
Norah's guy is most likely married. The fact that she's not impressed by him claiming he's seeing a therapist now is great - good for her! She's not letting him string her along anymore. Anna Runkle's advice is spot on.
That therapist visit may also be a lie
Agreed. He treats her like a sex worker.
He ain't tired! He's married and NOT to his job! And, he's a liar! Norah, throw the trash out because you deserve your space be clean.
Once identified, dealing with limerence takes a lot of self discipline. The feelings don't go away unless you sever that tie.
100%
Norah, regardless of why he is unavailable, he just is. It sounds like you are ready to move on. Best wishes to you in getting out of a situation that does not give you the full relationship that you want and deserve. Be strong and don't settle for crumbs!
Thank you for sharing your encouragement for the letter-writer!
Nika@TeamFairy
This is me, I was a "beggar for love" any little bit of kindness fed me for weeks. Be kind to others, it might save their lives...
This guy is married come on!! He’s hiding his life from her and his wife. If a man won’t spend the night with you or go on a trip with you or share his life with you, leave him alone 😢😢😢
I wish this weren’t a probable outcome. But i agree.
That didn't occur to me until Anna said it. But, yes, it makes sense.
exactly..
If he is married to either another person and or his job... Highly unlikely that he will ever change... I think for her better no relationship than a bad one...
This is spot on ❤
Just a note to that one letter: if your romantic interest is your therapist, THEY ARE NOT A GOOD IDEA. They are directly breaking their code of ethics if they are entertaining that. ABORT ABORT
That's not the only reason why.
@@ND-or5so well yeah it’s a crazy unbalanced power dynamic. But someone willing to risk their license and disregard their ethical principals is just one of many reasons to not get involved
It’s so comforting to hear that others are unsure if they want a relationship or marriage. Not that I want anyone else to feel that way but it makes me feel like this is common for cptsd and it’s not just something wrong with me 😅
It's kind of crazy to know that my confusion about why people want marriage and long term relationships is likely a trauma thing, not just a me thing.
He became better. I became worse because of the relationship. So draining. Once I started to fight back, he blamed me for his issues.
Same story as me
My mother was the drinker tho
Hallelujah! Thank you for saying that monogamy is a good thing and validating my beliefs on that. I’m so tired of encountering poly, ENM, and “open relationships” in the dating world. They sound like excuses to me not to make an effort and not to commit.
ENM? plz define, thnx.
Agreed. Open relationships give space for people to avoid being truly vulnerable.
@@FreeQueen-md7zm
Ethical non monogamy
These people try to project their insecurities and vice onto society. That’s a no no. You either commit or you don’t and you leave people alone.
I love how just by the magic of saying the word “ethical” in front of non-monogamy, somehow instantly makes it so, right? 🙄
I get a kick out of your company name. Crappy Childhood Fairy. I think that’s what drew me to this channel. I knew awhile ago that traditional therapy was not the type of help I needed to heal. I was looking for and needed something different. I knew just talking about it wasn’t going to help when I didn’t know the root cause or where my trauma stemmed from. This is the first time where I have felt completely comfortable with my trauma and it’s comforting to know that I’m not alone. It also helps that you have experienced similar situations and understand trauma. It helps to know that someone has been through what you been through. So when I found you i said thank you god, finally someone who understands and gets it. The stories you have shared, the wealth of knowledge and resources you have provided has helped me tremendously. I really like that you read letters people send to you and break them down. This is a really great exercise and I’ve been incredibly touched by the stories you have shared. Thank you. ❤
I suffer with bipolar and cptsd. Trying to educate myself on both. Everything I hear is so hopeless. Thank God for your videos. Only ones to seem to offer hope
Hey were twins!!! ❤😂
My question is- did she talk to anyone -friend- 😅about this relationship? Anyone who hears this.... no holidays and 1 x a week visits and being strung along all are clear signs hes got someone. Her body knew, emotions and healthwise, but her mind didn't want to accept it. Trust yourself and ask the hard questions. You must not diminish yourself in any relationship!
Anna is just an Angel for sending out her healing, strong messages! Thanks a lot to her and her Team! ❤❤❤
I never wanted marriage until I went to coda. True healing. Facing my Limerent issues and my past traumas. I couldn’t define me or what I wanted. I’m working on it now.
What is coda?
Codependents Anonymous. It's a 12 step program. It's great. They have a lot of virtual mtgs and some in person depending where you are.
@@tinag9694thank you for this. I think this is worth looking into and may help me.
This is a documentary of my life!!!
I connect with much of what is expressed in these letters. I am new to this channel and in 2 days of listening to multiple videos I have felt progress in myself ( I realize this could sound crazy to a new person her reading comments)
I would judge the same. If you are someone who is skeptical, yet desperate for understanding in how trauma has manipulated and/or created reality for your life, I CAN guarantee YOU will find comfort in this channel... Listen to variety and read comments. That's what I have done the past couple days.
I appreciate this channel and everyone who is also struggling with CPTSD😌
Thank you for being a part of our community here. We appreciate you too!
Nika@TeamFairy
So much heartbreak in my life that I have given up on love...
i know the feeling. same thing as me. I married a Covert and i'm in a battle for divorce. 15 years as if it meant F ALL. I even saved her life in a accident few years ago...meant nothing. single for life even if a crave affection and love constantly. I was never loved in 46 years, family, parents narcs. ex's all had narcs behaviour. I have a magnet for them staying single is the only sure way i'll never get abuse and manipulated again. I loathe being a empath, it always got me manipulated. I love women but women hates me.
@@Ballpython77I was only manipulated once it was awful,to add insult I knew her from high school 46 yrs ago.she screwed me over on purpose,that is what hurt the most. No more relationships for me, I hate deceit and she knew it, I have never dis- liked anyone as much as her.evil...
I really like what you said about not playing small but becoming ourselves and using our talents to help others! That is a very helpful comment! Thank-you for all your advice and good council! 😊
The piece on Vivienne's letter is so spot on, I'm so glad you didn't hold back. I really feel for her, but it's time to start caring about how her actions can hurt others.
Yes, thus I often reached out to the wrong people, sadly! For morsels of love!
For me the first video hit home, especially when I first watched it a few years back. I had gone out of an abusive marriage, and after a few years have been in similar situations with dating, only that had lasted around 6 months. I guess I was not paying attention to any other red flags as long as the guy wasn't abusive. Didn't spend holidays or much time with me- no problem, I pretended I don't have any needs. This is all so very sad for me now. It's so sad also that Nora spent 4 years in a crappy relationship..I hope her life has changed for the better
How can you have a "relationship" with someone who you only see once a week? Not spending holidays, weekend or overnights is a huge red flag! If this guy really wants to be with you he would make the time.
The best thing that anyone can do is focus on their job/financial health. Once someone is financially/job secure in themselves, then outside relationships will be easier to navigate. We should take care of our own needs first. Food, clothing, shelter. It all takes a good income coming in each month.
Yes, it's fundamental. If you become financially dependent upon a romantic partner you'll be in a very precarious situation.
I felt the same way for so many years. I was able to climb the corporate ladder and became a workaholic. The office became my safe place to avoid my crappy life with a narcissistic husband. Looking back, I should have used some of the money I earned to take care of my mental state. To take care of myself. If only...Today I'm trying to rebuild my life and I am very grateful I found this channel. Thank you for this channel. I feel safe here and learning a lot.
A person who makes you happy. So far, that has only been fulfilled by a puppy long ago.
I was starved for love and food 😢
In a previous relationship I was a secret to his friends and family. Staying in that situation really does a number on one’s self esteem.
He was separated and going through a divorce and although they had been living separately for years, he was worried about what others thought of him dating. To top it off his ex and him also kept putting off their divorce.
I was upset and he could never muster the empathy to understand my negative emotions around this. I focused on being a secret and blamed myself. I became very insecure over anything and everything. When really it was about his own low self esteem (needing approval from his friends and family) and his unwillingness to completely end things with his wife.
I’ve healed enough from that to know to not stay in this kind of situation and also to not take on others problems and make it something about me.
I feel good about myself and dating good men without messy situations. It’s been a freeing and fun experience that I’m allowing myself to have!
Thank you, this was eye-opening! (I almost typoed I-opening:)
Sounds like he is married
If he works so much, where's the money then? 😆
I was with held love from my mother.She was emotionally, mentally, and physically abusive. It was not just mentally an issue but physically also> When I was 15 I started having severe anxiety attacks to the point of passing out. I am 47 now and I don't have them as much but still occasionally do when things get a little too emotionally tough. It's a very scary place to be but hopeful things will get better,
Preach!!! preacher!!
Thank you ❤
Bookmarking 1:00:00. So that's what the randomly flirting very hard one night and then brushing it off as just having fun was for. Here I had been thinking she actually liked me...
thank you for this comment 😭😭 i watched this video a couple days ago and forgot what this was called, i scrolled through the comments for like 10 mins hoping someone would comment on it
Sometimes it's not even bookmarking. Girls sometimes flirt for entertainment, boost to self esteem, validation. Bookmarking is like you have a possibility with her someday when she's drunk or sad. Aimless flirting is you have zero chances, she wouldn't even remember she flirted with you.
It does work
Does it for a week and feel less fear
For 2 weeks
I do the dayli practice Between 1 time and more and more 2 times a day, with 15min meditation.
I began with 3 days, the way you teach it, too try, after having made it with your guidnes and felt a difference after that first time 🙏🤔👍
The difference was Amazing.😄😙
I have C-PTSD 🤯 and lived in fear and stress most of the time since I'm 15 ( now 53 ) and it worked !!!
But twice a day 20 min meditation was too much.
I decided to stick to 10 min ones a day, no matters what happens and made a comitment with my self to never stop this practice, for all my life.
For me your daily practice is what makes the reste possible, without I'm scared that the c-PTSD will gane power over me, slowly down and down....
I feel it in my guts and trust your experince.
It is hard work too integrat some thing new in my life and I'm tired to loos the benefits because I stop meditation as I felt better and Wanted to meet poeaple, thinking that's what I need. Human support !
Thank you too help me see the priority and help me stay fucust.
I use multiples health approches.
But I'm new here on TH-cam.
Since I discuvered that there was the informations I need, I watch different TH-camurs.
What I like, is that I choose who I lissen to and keep those I feel trustfull. It is easy, because I say yes with all my body while lissening 🙏💕💕
I reconaze my story and my pains describe by poeaple who don't know me.
I was desesperate, I worked hard on me but, even I did improove, the chronic fatigue, fear, stress, emotional flash back, no understending support, no friends ( I'm weird, smell stress, fear and ask questions all the time... No one wanted to tell me...
Now I prefer too get those from you, said in a soft and empathic way.
I can understand them better now and learn to behave.
With my TH-camrs therapists groupe I get the help I need.
With chronic fatigue I have too take it slow and give me the time I need to build a good understending.
For that I immerge intoo good thoughts, questions, explanations, mirror effect and much Moore.
It helps me to see reality at it IS.
And I writte more often, moove a litel bit more.
Juste with the Fary ❤️ daily practice I change and use those too add an other helpful action, that flow toogether... And One thing leed too an other change.... Like that way, baby Steps 👍💯🤘💪
I heard your story and don't want to get back too illness.... I had enough of those 😥
This was enlightening for me. Am in therapy for third time dealing with stuff like this. So thank you , to the women who wrote in and for wonderful response. This channel is awesome and deeply meaningful ❤
It is so draining!! I can relate
Lack of energy is the worst for me 😢😢😢
"Name it to tame it" 👍!!
The elephant in the room is she was not emotionaly available during those years.
The time and oportunities lost...
TIRED 😂 THIS GUY IS MARRIED AND HAS HAD A 4 YEAR AFFAIR WITH YOU DEAR. RUN AND DO NOT LOOK BACK! 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
Absolute book marking…this guy is using this young girl to pump up his ego.
"Bookmarking" great new term i learned
I've come to terms with the fact that shit went side ways and I watch your videos nodding. I can see every red flag and every mistake but I can't see or find the energy to move in any direction.. it's like I'm stuck in between enlightenment and "is it worth it to keep on"..?
1:00 bookmarking several times dents confidence.
Maybe she's with my husband. He sounds like him, "always needs to rest."
I love your videos and your hair looks so good. Those layers are layering, lol. One day I will write to you about my situation. I need some insight
Losing friends, opportunities due to NEEDINESS! GLAD I hot help and went No Contact with FAMILY BULLIES!!💜💟💜
Bad partners approach eveeyone. It is not that we attract them, we say yes to them. There is a difference.
I am a survivor of child abuse. I cry often. My entire childhood was full of physical abuse. Presently in therapy. Its not easy. But im alive. When i was a kid. I never thought i would make past 8 years old. But im here.
Good luck on your healing journey! If you're interested, try Daily Practice. It is a great way to process fears and resentment. You can try it free here: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice
Nika@TeamFairy
Thank you
Omg! This already sounds like my relationship with my passive-aggressive covert narcissistic husband. He was totally unavailable even when he was at home with me every night. He neglects, ignores, and disrespects me, every day there is some kind of abuse. He abused mentally, emotionally and psychologically, and financially. Gas lighting, head games and totally manipulated me any chance got and he is a pathological liar, he has no empathy whatsoever and no self awareness, emotionally immature, lazy, not supportive and no appreciation for all I did for him and how I carried the whole relationship including his half. All the things that I didn't and wouldn't want in a man. These are not qualities at all that build a healthy, loving, solid marriage. 9 years of abuse and a waste of time for me. I left him. I'm trying to heal now, and it's a tough road.
You made a good decision. Good luck on your healing journey!
Nika@TeamFairy
Last year I decided to ghost... yes.. ghost... 4 people who I think trying to get inappropriate. I felt bad for ghosting but somehow the only way for me to feel safe was to ghost them. So I did not give them any response. I feel like, you are giving me the confirmation that I've done what needed to get done. Thanks Fairy!!
Thank you
I learned about the wire monkey when I was a psych major, and my reaction was similar to yours. Pavlov's dogs was another one that was horrifying. It makes me sick that researchers are so cruel sometimes.
there s nothing cruel about pavlov, also, the way humans treat each other is far worse
@@AugfordpdoggiePavlov I don’t know, but if you aren’t bothered by the Harlow experiments on the monkeys, something’s happened to your heart…
To the third person, I ended up in a situation like this! Not with an older man, and he was single at the time (when we dated) - But we always talked Too Much when he wasn’t single, and looking back, I really hurt his last ex girlfriend. I’ve since had to work very hard to recognize my role in that, and what I did wrong, and how I was selfish.
That said, I understand how you feel, I seriously do. He made me feel attended to and cared for, but obviously, he wasn’t very faithful to his partners and when we did date, it turned into the first caller’s situation.
I hope you find someone better- and trust me- it’s not worth it! You can do better.
So mooved by your story 😢😢😢😢 thank you for sharing ❤❤❤
Thanks for sharing these kind words :) -Calista@TeamFairy
I have been watching you for about a month Anne. Awesome teaching. I have tried so many times to do the daily practice it’s not easily accessible
You may be interested in the Daily Practice calls. During the calls, you can ask Anna (or other CCF coaches) questions about the practice. If you're interested, please contact our customer service team at hello@crappychildhoodfairy.com and they will share with you a link to the Daily Practice call calendar:
Nika@TeamFairy
I had a similar situation with a man who was not married . He worked two jobs. He never slept because he worked so much when we would get together he would just sleep. Found out he’s homeless sleeps in his car and gets his mail sent to his moms . Smh
I would like to suggest Celebrate Recovery as a great 12 step program.
He sounds like he might be married.
❤❤ THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR SHARE 😮 learn so much about my self
Thank you for this Amazing CPTSD COMMUNITY
My Catt show his support and when I ame not HERE he doesn't like it and does keep distance, but still observe me ❤️❤️❤️
Right now Zen 😺 is on me 👍💯❤️💪🤘
1:00:00 So glad you are telling her!
Can you discuss knowing with every fiber of your being that some act you are asked to do is very very wrong but that it being wrong is irrelevant. The "higher good" of doing the wrong is ostensibly "helping someone else."
Eroticized feelings of longing, wow you put into words what I have been feeling.
I have a next door neighbor I see and talk to everyday. I have known him for 2 yrs now and we are very very good friends. Something shifted in our relationship about 3 -4 months ago and I developed very strong feelings for him. Before I had absolutely no romantic feelings for him and all of a sudden I cant stop thinking about him 24/7 and the fantasies. I told him I thought I was starting to have feelings for him and he told me he didnt think he could ever love anyone except his girlfriend of 25 yrs who passed 2 1/2 yrs ago. I will not go into all the details he has told me about her but I can tell they had a trauma bond for sure. He asked her to marry him after 1 yr and she said no and do not ever ask me again. He told me they broke up and got back together countless times until she actually married someone else. Lasted only a short time and she came back again. He took her back but for the last 10yrs they were "only" friends. They had everything but the sleeping together, and I believe him knowing him like I do. His mother was horrible to him growing up so all this is not a surprise.
He is not moving and neither am I and it has been very painful having these feelings. I have tried convincing myself to not have feelings for him. We are older and I want to go back to being just companions. I stopped dating and having any kind of relationships for almost 20yrs and this is the first time in a long time. It snuck up on me and I was not expecting it. I knew my picker was off, I always picked unavailable men. The issue was I identified the problem but did nothing to fix it.
I have to tell you I have only been using the Dailey Practice for a couple of days but it has made a HUGE difference! I noticed after the first time. I do not feel as crazy and I can focus better. The eroticized feelings of longing are almost gone. I know I have enough of my own issues and I do not need a project. Thank you!
I totally understand the second woman. She tells my story. I do think of my love life as experiments.l think of all my life as an experiment. Now I'm numerically older but not in my head. I'm in an avoidant LDR with a younger man. I don't want anything else even if I give him up. Been married twice long ago and don't want to be married now. It just seems like having CPSD dooms you for picking the right men. If l can't have happy relationships l can at least have an adventurous life. BTW been sober since 1990. Thank goodness l don't crave sex like before..not ruling it out but it can wait
Identical 2 my childhood but it was the mother that had addictions
My partner and I have bn 2gether 3 years... no emotional support and he gaslights and judges my depression as to say Im unemployable/useless
Why do I stay
We dont have children 2gether so why do i keep trying 2 make him happy...
Not that he says thank you ever
I struggel with relationships. I have no close friends..... Because I feel attraction for what is familiar too me.
I don't date befor I have a better insight, knowledge and capacity to found the Right People too be with as friends..... And I have a discipline too build, in order too become my BESTY... GRATFUL FOR YOUR GUIDENS ❤️❤️
I had many questions I have an answer for NOW !
Like Light in the Dark 🙏🌞
We're all rooting for you! -Calista@TeamFairy
Hi Anna, have you heard of P. E. R. M. A. by Dr. Martin Seligman? You often say happiness is the best medication to control the symptoms of Childhood Trauma as an adult. So I'm curious of your opinion on using P.E.R.M.A as a blueprint for building happiness.
Gwen, you're 21 years old. That means you're HOT. Men are going to be attracted to you and come on to you. Ones that are much older and already in committed relationships are creeps - they're not worth your time. Of course it's tempting to engage with someone who wants to engage with you - but ultimately it's a waste of your time, so just ignore them and don't engage in texting. That will free up your time and energy for more suitable relationships. Get out there where good ones can find you. Find the places where the good ones are, and show up there.
@@elipotter369 That is so smart. I can't say I'm entirely relationship smart, myself... but I'm learning and getting wiser. I'm glad I'm not a young woman anymore - that helps remove the intensity of who/what gets drawn to me.
💕
💔 starving forced to eat food.. 54 now she wasn't my mother who beat me silly 1972 -2022 She passed away 2022.. I'm still not sure how to feel for her.
ThAnk you. My ex takes her new hub where we got married and Baptist by pastor, my gramps. So wrong. Just must more aligned
Im sorry but i bet this guy is married
He Is. Listening to this I understand know how I Never knew im with married guy. I was Never asking much and thought it's normal😮😢
@@alextarotif your guy is married to somebody else. Please leave! I was in similar situation and they will not leave the their wife. They’re still married for a reason and you deserve 100% more from someone 100% better. Don’t fall for the love bombing! It’s hard to walk away but you can do it and work on your self-esteem and self-confidence. You’re worth it!!! 💙💙💙
@@alextarot yeah, u have to learn the red flags, some men can b so manipulative and even tho its disgusting that they r CHEATING on their wives, they dont care for her or u.
@@KatErina-ii6ru I left as soon as i found out
@@alextarot ♥️
❤
Aw, yes, the lilacs and the man. But what if we don't want the human bondage of marriage? What if we are keyed to higher values: agency, connection, acceptance, peaceful co-existence and so on? Any suggestions Anna?
Ugh, what do you suggest for people dealing with being alone, when valentines day happens? Dealing with getting over limerance and the void of that day?
I think I will book a relaxing spa day for and by myself. And I want to cook something for myself, something really nice. And I'll read the best book there is 🥰
Get together with friends and family. Start making plans to not be alone. It helps alot.
Please talk about your idea of spiritual self care because I feel rudderless even if things get "done". I feel afraid of people especially men at large and am worried about ending up completely alone. What do you do to feel okay and be a woman?
Anna often recommends a free course ‘The Daily Practice’ because it is the technique that led to her own healing, and she uses it to this day. It can help process fears and resentments. Here’s a link if you’re interested: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice
Nika@TeamFairy
I have lived alone for 40 years alone, not the best, nor the worst looking woman. Years ago, I lived in “a hope” I fear that I have been living in a “make believe world”. The years are gone, and now am I waking up? Rather late.
Hi Fairy, I recently due to many reasons have to stay at home and I think many old sealed secrets got out, I think I need some help but I am not sure on what kinds. I wonder is there any way to message you privately? My current situation is quite complex, therefore I couldn't elaborate here. best, Cel
Thank you Anna , you are kind, please I need your help. No I am not a lady but I am very sensitive and I am a guy I need your help please please guide me I have CPTSD and ADHD and clearly I need your help, I am listening to your letters and I need help. Tell me plain and simple what shall I do?
As. a. child , It was punishment if I had much. attention! Now. doing a. LOT. of reflection I face a. lot.....Not. something I recommend doing alone...
She needs to do a background check on "Matt", there's something waaaaaay bigger thats going on with him than ptsd.
You can do this Nora, take the reigns and find the truth
There's a tyrany of Happiness, that refuses to give place to take care about ouer suffering😢
If love was food i was raised on a combination of raspberry cheesecake and broken car windshields depending on the day
I try so hard to be patient and understanding with people but this guy triggered my abandonment and neglect wounds...we were not officially together but no drama happened it was left on a positive note and I got foolishly hopeful....its been two months and he's ignored my last message..I am so angry want to send him a message telling him he will never have another chance.... for my own pom. I go back and forth about trying to have a balance of setting boundaries and empathy for others but for whatever reason I feel pushed to the max whenever pursuing love even when I give them all the space in the world... I don't know if this is reasonable to feel this way, am I justified in my anger and not letting him have a back burner open door option? im 37 its taken so long to heal from ptsd and I've made great strides.. so mentally tired and I feel hopeless now.
You don’t owe him a back burner open door…
Start Rock climbing at a gym, you’ll find a great community, you’ll get in shape and you’ll be in nature with nice people. It’s the greatest female community ever
how am i able to talk to you to tell you my story for you to go over it like this because im in a really confusing situation
You can write to Anna here: bit.ly/CCF_Letters -Calista@TeamFairy
He’s married
But you guys here tell me if it s common for people with ptsd not to see themselves planning to be married, or ir s only me , i have been always wishing to be with someone but never ever though of me getting married and that ruled me into dating married men all my life,
For YEARS I thought deep down in my heart I wasn’t worthy of getting married yet I longed for it FOREVER.
Also dated married men more than one, thought they would marry me, or dating abusers and narcissists. I had no idea all this was connected to CPTSD. You’re not alone!!!
I never wanted to be married, when I was younger I was afraid of being trapped (part of my C-PTSD), these days I just feel more stable and relaxed not having a partner. I’ve had boyfriends but I don’t think any of my relationships have been healthy.
I don’t feel marriage is a necessity for myself and personally don’t think getting married is a reliable indicator of anyone’s self worth, as paradoxical as that may seem to some. We’ve all heard of horrible marriages, and know there are devoted couples out there who aren’t married, and worse - people who were devoted but got married only for marriage to essentially ruin what they had.
Omg yes. It doesn’t even feel like it’s a possibility
He could be married.... To his job!!
It's the fact that she's never seen him on a major holiday that makes me suspect he's married to a wife (and probably has kids). That would be where he is on Thanksgiving and Christmas. Of course we don't have enough information to know.
I think you're beautiful!
But what if i don't want to longer marry?
♡ here is a dark space for your eyes
♡
Only works in dark mode :-)
I haven't even heard all this but i quickly came to the conclusion the first ladies boyfriend was a cheater. Hes a married man. Using her and shes been sucked in and fooled. Hes not available for holidays and more visits because hes married. Sad to say i think it was Nora has been tricked and not noticed signs shes been had
Hope 1:53:53 she didn't listen, terrible, harmful BS advice for someone who have been so vulnerable
Will update with exactly why
Did the same.....
Still co living..... Not enough energy to moove out know..... But I don't want to see him
He is a narcissist
crap…..I think I’ve been “Matt”
sort of….