It took me 15 years in AA to finally surrender to God and to work this program fully I never drank since I come in but I certainly never had emotional sobriety, with the help of my God I now know what emotional sobriety feels like, hang in there guys it does get better.
I'm back to day one, there's been way too many day ones, I'm 60 years old thinking if I could go back in time and never drink or use drugs the misery I would have spared others and myself, reminded if I had God's power to change everything I would change so many things, if I had his wisdom I wouldn't change a thing, God reminded me I never have to drink or use again spare others to misery and myself, Lord let me pick up my cross and follow you daily
Right ideals either give you life or your delusions will leave you living a lie. Uncover, discover and discard. My sponsor knows the whole truth, not half truths about me.
Perfectionism is among the worst & most self-destructive characteristic. It's part of why my father committed suicide 40 years after dropping out from a full academic scholarship to Princeton. He couldn't deal with the potential success he might have, then of dropping out & losing the opportunity. Perfectionism has been my own lifelong struggle as well.
Lost at 24 years in the fellowship..this is my second day since relationship break up (painfull)...this talk has showed me so much...l was trying to build a jumbe jet with no tools no skills no help, and l didn't know it.. Thank you Tom, thank you God..can l begin again, feeling hopefull .. Ricky
Oh my god. This is so exactly how I’ve been feeling- I’m at the end of my fourth year of recovery and hitting so many bottoms of depression even though I’m doing everything I’m “supposed” to be doing for AA.. thank you for this tape. You’ve helped me so much today. I really needed this today
I had the 5 year menopause and relapsed. It is exactly how he described it. Everything outside of myself was going the best it had ever been but I was absolutely fucking miserable. And I drank. Back in recovery but feeling those emotional hangovers, so glad this video was shared with me. So thankful for AA and those who are doing the deal and sharing their experience and hope with the rest of us.
You have just described how I have been feeling and behaving for most of my life. Thank you! I have been working on myself..Awareness and Acceptance, then I continue to work towards being a better me..
I can see now I lost my emotional sobriety at almost 13 years- & I drank. I’m grateful I was only out there 7 days. 7 horrific days. Wish there was another way for me to stay sober but I haven’t found one either so I think will just stay
Fantastic. I have to echo what so many others have already said, "This is me." I would go so far as to say it's many people, not just alcoholics. I am an alcoholic, coming up to 5 years of sobriety and so much of this talk rings true to me it's frightening. Its also liberating, a great talk.
Thank you for posting this. I needed some positive input and this really helped in this Covid-19 pandemic when I am cut off from most of society. One day at a time things will get better.
Thanks Tom B I'm 22 years sober, still working at it and ever willing and open to the message carried with this sincerity and quality. I recently doubled up my Step work but I realize that that's not all I need to do for growth in my emotional sobriety. I'm currently reading "Addiction And Grace" by Gerald May and it's helping me to identify the myriad ways I'm enslaved through attachments and addictions, not just to alcohol or other chemicals which is beyond cure and can only be treated daily by abstinence. My other many addictions include being right and attached to expectations I have of many different things and outcomes leading to depression when things don't go as planned. "Let go and let God" is a big leap into spiritual sobriety and it's right there in AA literature, steps and recommended work only every time I read I see stuff I missed and I know that the only way is practice and more practice bringing me progress while God, with my help, takes care of the rest.
Praise God for this beautiful message! You have definitely helped me today. Awareness, honesty, and compassion to all including myself. Not relying on another human being to solve my problem but I alone have within me the ability and forgive and give. You are a true gentleman ❤️
I have been in the Fellowship of AA since 1976 Alateen I have experienced several periods of what I called Longterm Sobriety, So I thought ? I have slipped 3 times with over 5 years dry every time doing the absolute best I can I threw in the towel Tom you saved my life today their is no worse feeling than not having emotional sobriety...Thanks
7 months sober. Just found a sponsor I like, on step 4. Never did 90 in 90 because i have avoidance. Six months in i started to pray every morning. Got the urge to go to daily meetings. I found that i loved being open, unloading my shame, and im starting to feel affection for AA. Don't give up even if you feel like you're doing it like a dumbass. Keep going. Ps i use EA as a supplement to AA, emotions anonymous. Only requirement is a desire to be emotionally well.
No where in the AA book does it say 90 in 90? Meeting were are place to share the solution which is completion of the 12 steps and a freedom from self to work and with others!
Almost 3y sober, I did change me, with work on program, change my life, fought my demons sober.....and changed the life of the ones around me... AA I'm grateful.
Thank you I have been sober for a year doing all the things, and couldn't figure out what was still wrong why. I know today as I answered yes to all the questions of self hate, and I am fortunate enough the person I love the most (me), still be here and able to identify the problem and ask for help. Thank you God thank you for being the AA meeting I opened this morning, I am loved
Emotional sobriety is key. I sometimes struggle even at close to 9 years. work food lust and plain distraction/disassociation. I am always only one blank from annihilation. emotional dependencies.
6 months sober thank to a new understanding to my gos as I understand him a great sponsor and a complete surrender to this way of life I’ve found in Alcoholics Anonymous and great speakers like this I’m so grateful to hear after a hurricane and finding this when I’m struggling to love myself and instantly putting myself down when someone compliments me thank you for this I needed this to the core
Wow!! Im in my teens now,4/22/2011, got ALOT of work to do now!!! 🤦♀️ Self hate is no joke. Another barrier ill be breaking down. Thank you!!!! Did i mention im 60???!!!😂
I have been almost 5 years sober 3 different times. Each time this emotional unsoberness took me out! I am so grateful To know this. I’m a little over 4 and going through it again. I want to move through this to the other side. Thank you Tom
@@user-ej1fc7yn1j still. sober. 5 years, 9 months! This year has been one of the hardest but the one with the most growth. Have to watch out for unsoberness!!! Lol
This may be the most beautiful talk on this channel I've ever listened to. Every negative aspect he described has been me my entire adult life. God bless you all.
Thank you so much for uploading this. It has truly changed my life. I started to look around for something like this but I could never find it. It was almost like he was speaking to me. You will never understand how you changed my life forever. Thank you 🙏
My go to talk even after the books, talks, speeches from world renowned spiritual teachers. Humans, regardless of title or education or disease, will always be my channel in which my hp flows. Thank you all for working on the walls that block that power and wisdom so that you might help others.
I have heard a lot of great speaker meetings but this is one of the absolute best. We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection and this gives us a great ideal to strive toward once we have a little abstinence under our belt. If you are a newcomer to AA, this is about as good as it gets. If we are based on attraction rather than promotion I can't imagine a better emissary for AA than Tom B.
Battle Tested thank you for the question... Jeff thank you for the answer. I have just put it in my "wish list" on Amazon. While I am 24 years sober I just bottomed out in regards to my EMOTIONAL SOBRIETY! In search of doing some serious work in this area. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired of the wreckage of the present because of these issues. That is what me to here... to hear Tom B. I believe, the saddest part was not knowing I was even in this place until it was too late. The alcoholic tornado (ME) was, once again, running a muck through peoples lives - SOBER. Hurting and damaging them in the process. Once again, time to clean off my side of the street!
It took me 15 years in AA to finally surrender to God and to work this program fully I never drank since I come in but I certainly never had emotional sobriety, with the help of my God I now know what emotional sobriety feels like, hang in there guys it does get better.
Thanks for sharing this Tom. It's been difficult for me as well. God bless. 🙏
Tom Michael from Daytona beach day 73 loved your messenge
Same… took me 12.5 years and I paid dearly for it. Never drank but the suffering was the same..
Wow, Nicola aratula Qld Australia
7 yrs. Totally identify
Listen to this over and over
Much warmth and sunshine too U. America xo AA
Thank you brother! I'm exactly at that point now. It's hard and hurts, really, to do that major surrender. God bless you and you all 🙏
This is one of the most descriptive recovery literature speakers in all circuit speakers. 🔥
I'm back to day one, there's been way too many day ones, I'm 60 years old thinking if I could go back in time and never drink or use drugs the misery I would have spared others and myself, reminded if I had God's power to change everything I would change so many things, if I had his wisdom I wouldn't change a thing, God reminded me I never have to drink or use again spare others to misery and myself, Lord let me pick up my cross and follow you daily
You haven't had a spiritual awakening yet
I'm so grateful for you guys and your support and friendship ❤
Right ideals either give you life or your delusions will leave you living a lie. Uncover, discover and discard. My sponsor knows the whole truth, not half truths about me.
I wrote this down in a notebook - WORD FOR WORD - in a notebook. I credit this breakdown for much of my serenity today. 7+ yrs sober.
Would you send me a copy please sir?
Me too
Perfectionism is among the worst & most self-destructive characteristic. It's part of why my father committed suicide 40 years after dropping out from a full academic scholarship to Princeton. He couldn't deal with the potential success he might have, then of dropping out & losing the opportunity. Perfectionism has been my own lifelong struggle as well.
I have listened to this multiple times and it hits different each time! I am so grateful for alcoholics anonymous!
Wow!! My fuckin story!
Lost at 24 years in the fellowship..this is my second day since relationship break up (painfull)...this talk has showed me so much...l was trying to build a jumbe jet with no tools no skills no help, and l didn't know it..
Thank you Tom, thank you God..can l begin again, feeling hopefull ..
Ricky
11 days here. Had 5 years up, 17 years ago. May God be with you, Ricky.
Oh my god. This is so exactly how I’ve been feeling- I’m at the end of my fourth year of recovery and hitting so many bottoms of depression even though I’m doing everything I’m “supposed” to be doing for AA.. thank you for this tape. You’ve helped me so much today. I really needed this today
Awesome I love this!!
Hi Jillie,same boat. My wife is walking out on me. I wish I heard this before i strayed from God so far
God please show me how to surrender to you permanently
Wow… Now, that’s a prayer…
I had the 5 year menopause and relapsed. It is exactly how he described it. Everything outside of myself was going the best it had ever been but I was absolutely fucking miserable. And I drank.
Back in recovery but feeling those emotional hangovers, so glad this video was shared with me. So thankful for AA and those who are doing the deal and sharing their experience and hope with the rest of us.
You have just described how I have been feeling and behaving for most of my life. Thank you! I have been working on myself..Awareness and Acceptance, then I continue to work towards being a better me..
Wonderful talk!!! Thank you !
Christopher Mency thank you for being honest!!! God will bless this honestly brother!!!!
Take the steps 🤔
I was like " this is an AA guru !" Until I heard him describe the lady who's been married 8 times ! Haaa, another alcoholic just like me
I had never heard of emotional unsoberness and it wowed me. it seemed like this guy was describing me and my behaviors down to a tee.
Same
Me to for sure
Grab a big book which is AA. Page 52, the bedevilments.
@@Mandalas12 thank you. I still have my first big book. I will definitely read it.
When one can't get out due to the weather or sickness or whatever - these e-meetings are priceless. Thank you so much for making them available!
Charles they are charles im on my 3rd year without alcohol
Thank U for shareing the insight for self hate and spiritual awakening with Sobriety. I share
I can see now I lost my emotional sobriety at almost 13 years- & I drank. I’m grateful I was only out there 7 days. 7 horrific days. Wish there was another way for me to stay sober but I haven’t found one either so I think will just stay
Fantastic. I have to echo what so many others have already said, "This is me." I would go so far as to say it's many people, not just alcoholics. I am an alcoholic, coming up to 5 years of sobriety and so much of this talk rings true to me it's frightening. Its also liberating, a great talk.
Excellent speaker. Really needed to hear this today. God bless you for the beautiful message.
Thank you for posting this. I needed some positive input and this really helped in this Covid-19 pandemic when I am cut off from most of society. One day at a time things will get better.
Thanks Tom B I'm 22 years sober, still working at it and ever willing and open to the message carried with this sincerity and quality. I recently doubled up my Step work but I realize that that's not all I need to do for growth in my emotional sobriety. I'm currently reading "Addiction And Grace" by Gerald May and it's helping me to identify the myriad ways I'm enslaved through attachments and addictions, not just to alcohol or other chemicals which is beyond cure and can only be treated daily by abstinence.
My other many addictions include being right and attached to expectations I have of many different things and outcomes leading to depression when things don't go as planned.
"Let go and let God" is a big leap into spiritual sobriety and it's right there in AA literature, steps and recommended work only every time I read I see stuff I missed and I know that the only way is practice and more practice bringing me progress while God, with my help, takes care of the rest.
Thank you for posting my friend 🙏
Praise God for this beautiful message! You have definitely helped me today. Awareness, honesty, and compassion to all including myself. Not relying on another human being to solve my problem but I alone have within me the ability and forgive and give. You are a true gentleman ❤️
So needed to hear this tonite. Thank you Tom B for sharing your wisdom & experience & reminding me at the end " be gentle with yourself"
Hugs ❤
I have been in the Fellowship of AA since 1976 Alateen I have experienced several periods of what I called Longterm Sobriety, So I thought ? I have slipped 3 times with over 5 years dry every time doing the absolute best I can I threw in the towel Tom you saved my life today their is no worse feeling than not having emotional sobriety...Thanks
It’s a powerful message. I drank heavily 3 nights a week for over 10 years. At home after work. Drinking problem, not alcoholic.
❤
Thank you tom b. AA legend
7 months sober. Just found a sponsor I like, on step 4. Never did 90 in 90 because i have avoidance. Six months in i started to pray every morning. Got the urge to go to daily meetings. I found that i loved being open, unloading my shame, and im starting to feel affection for AA. Don't give up even if you feel like you're doing it like a dumbass. Keep going.
Ps i use EA as a supplement to AA, emotions anonymous. Only requirement is a desire to be emotionally well.
No where in the AA book does it say 90 in 90? Meeting were are place to share the solution which is completion of the 12 steps and a freedom from self to work and with others!
@@Tweeterandthemonkeyman I am well! IF you were asking me. I live a free life. Focused on what I give today.
@@Mandalas12seriously!
share the solution ≠ unloading shame at a group level lol
@@RaymondRAYCE ABC Anonymous
One of my all time favorite talks. Thank you ❤
Almost 3y sober, I did change me, with work on program, change my life, fought my demons sober.....and changed the life of the ones around me... AA I'm grateful.
Thank you I have been sober for a year doing all the things, and couldn't figure out what was still wrong why. I know today as I answered yes to all the questions of self hate, and I am fortunate enough the person I love the most (me), still be here and able to identify the problem and ask for help. Thank you God thank you for being the AA meeting I opened this morning, I am loved
Emotional sobriety is key. I sometimes struggle even at close to 9 years. work food lust and plain distraction/disassociation. I am always only one blank from annihilation. emotional dependencies.
This hit me hard yesterday. I wept when he mentioned self-hate.
This is stunning in its insight, compassion and deep love of humanity. Real good stuff here, skillfully presented. Wow.
GildaLee27 agreed
❤️
6 months sober thank to a new understanding to my gos as I understand him a great sponsor and a complete surrender to this way of life I’ve found in Alcoholics Anonymous and great speakers like this I’m so grateful to hear after a hurricane and finding this when I’m struggling to love myself and instantly putting myself down when someone compliments me thank you for this I needed this to the core
Intention don't help those affected
Wow!! Im in my teens now,4/22/2011, got ALOT of work to do now!!! 🤦♀️
Self hate is no joke. Another barrier ill be breaking down.
Thank you!!!!
Did i mention im 60???!!!😂
I have been almost 5 years sober 3 different times. Each time this emotional unsoberness took me out! I am so grateful
To know this. I’m a little over 4 and going through it again. I want to move through this to the other side. Thank you Tom
Checking in - how’s it going over there?
@@user-ej1fc7yn1j still. sober. 5 years, 9 months! This year has been one of the hardest but the one with the most growth. Have to watch out for unsoberness!!! Lol
@@michellek2946 same here 100% on the same page - great news God bless
@@michellek2946 🎉😊
Keep coming back
I can so relate, and i've got 38 years. Never slipped, yet tis me.
That which is alive is warm and flexible. That which is dead is hard and stiff.
Thanks to an amazing person for sending me this link ND ❤✝️🙏
What’s the name of the quote ancient book” he refers to at the five minute mark?
The greatest AA speech ever spoken
38 years in and just learning this!. Thank you all for sharing this. Hugs!!!!❤
That funny when he said don't you critize me that's my job
Amazing share and experience
God bless you Tom B 🇬🇧
Happy Joyous and Free.... is a personal decision. Thank You
One of the best talks you’ll ever hear. Fantastic
really well spoken god bless :)
Excellent talk. Thank you.
47:12 mark, hit me like a ton of bricks..... great lead about emotional sobriety..Thanks for sharing TomB!
Three years sober hit this little depression but start again live the life as it's meant to be we are not alone odaat
Thank you so very much. This was an amazing talk and I am truly grateful I was somehow led to this link.
Needed to hear this ! Thank you for the message
My dad loves this
This may be the most beautiful talk on this channel I've ever listened to. Every negative aspect he described has been me my entire adult life.
God bless you all.
Thank you so much for uploading this. It has truly changed my life. I started to look around for something like this but I could never find it. It was almost like he was speaking to me. You will never understand how you changed my life forever. Thank you 🙏
I overstood what he said. I also felt like he was talking to me and he described so many behaviors I display down to a tee.
I love this. completely me
This is fantastic…do yourself a favour and have a listen 💪🙏
Thank you Tom. I didn’t think about sobriety on those terms.
Such a good speech
thanks be to God for learning 🙏
Thank you
Never heard of this. So happy i did. Thank you and subbed.
This is codependency!
ACA and dysfunctional families addressed this as well, and its also knowns as para-alcoholism.
Thanks Tom, very thought provoking presentation
Anyone catch the name of the book he mentions in the beginning? Sounded like afeelakolia
The book he references is the Philokalia - a text used by the Eastern Orthodox Church. Writings of the Desert Fathers. 👍🏻
Seth Sherwin thank you sir.
Seth Sherwin thanks
Fantastic
Amazing video!!!! It really spoke right to me.
Does anyone know who Bob is that he continues to refer to? :-)
All I can say is wow!
Awesome it reinforces what's already being said by my sponsor
My go to talk even after the books, talks, speeches from world renowned spiritual teachers. Humans, regardless of title or education or disease, will always be my channel in which my hp flows. Thank you all for working on the walls that block that power and wisdom so that you might help others.
Great talk. Thanks for uploading.
startin to love tom b jr
So good.
Thanks for the uploads 🙏🏻
Thank you for this. ❤️
I have heard a lot of great speaker meetings but this is one of the absolute best. We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection and this gives us a great ideal to strive toward once we have a little abstinence under our belt. If you are a newcomer to AA, this is about as good as it gets. If we are based on attraction rather than promotion I can't imagine a better emissary for AA than Tom B.
Did this speaker ever right a book or put together a workbook on this topic?
Mark Gagarin yes You can order A thirst for wholeness online
Jeff Aldridge Do you know the authors full name? Joanne
joanne olderich Tom Brady Jr.
Battle Tested thank you for the question... Jeff thank you for the answer. I have just put it in my "wish list" on Amazon. While I am 24 years sober I just bottomed out in regards to my EMOTIONAL SOBRIETY! In search of doing some serious work in this area. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired of the wreckage of the present because of these issues. That is what me to here... to hear Tom B. I believe, the saddest part was not knowing I was even in this place until it was too late. The alcoholic tornado (ME) was, once again, running a muck through peoples lives - SOBER. Hurting and damaging them in the process. Once again, time to clean off my side of the street!
Testeklees❤❤❤
:-)
Fantastic tape
I thank you for your talk it's been very good