It hurts so much. It makes you think back to your past, finding signs of anything that could be seen as what you're afraid of being. It makes you wonder who you really are and if you're actually a good person.
Watching this balling my eyes out for my younger self who had no idea what the hell was going on, had never heard of anything like this and felt so trapped alone and utterly utterly terrified. feeling such relief watching this as OCD has reared its ugly head of late due to coming off medication. I really hope you know how many people you are helping with this. It’s absolutely incredible and so brave of you. I can’t thank you enough. Thank you thank you thank you 🙏
Thank you so much for your courage in opening up about this issue; I rarely comment on videos but felt to under this one because I want to applaud you in talking about this in order to help others but also because I’ve never told anyone explicitly that I suffer from this OCD theme, which as a mother is tremendously difficult and I cannot describe the hell it was to be going through it and having no idea what POCD was - finding out this was a theme and seeing that my ego dystonic intrusive thoughts and unwanted images and everything this involves is a genuine experience others go through; I’d felt so alone and know in all honesty I’m not that and I’m not these unwanted thoughts - which are themselves traumatic for me. I’ve only in the last few weeks discovered this and found the advice for intrusive thoughts concerning cognitive difussion and therapeutic surrender , ACT acceptance and ERP. I suffer with Harm OCD themes and sensory motor themes in relation to my otter themes and my head feels like a tangled mess; but for the first time in a few years , including a mental breakdown and time in a psychiatric ward hospital while I went through this without knowing what it was - I finally realise I can stop fighting these thoughts and trying to block which makes it worse. I need to allow and since finding out this theme exists I’m being medicated for ocd and was inspired to be able to communicate properly with the professionals working with me on the NHS. I’m new to knowing this exists and if it wasn’t for the bravery of people like you in opening up about it how much longer might I have gone before understanding this is a genuine condition and finding resources like this which follow the cognitive difusion and ERP route for OCD. I’ve been obsessively researching it but largely because I genuinely wish to be well informed for the best hopes of recovery and healing. Since knowing there are others and that this is a genuine condition I’ve been able to respond with less extreme distress to the intrusive thoughts and label them for what they are. OCD really does target everything we hold dear and the intrusive thoughts can be ever so painful. I’ve been able to hug and act more normally with my son, been taking him swimming and not be avoiding in my behaviours already which means I least can function better. I’ve not been responding to the intrusive thoughts in the same ways and though I’m still in the midst of everything my distress levels are much better than they have been. I’m so grateful to you and all those putting out decent content to help people with ocd and related disorders. To a degree I can’t quite express. I’m considering ‘ocd recovery’ for that extra mile in my recovery (I need to be able to finance it too, I have little so it’s a big decision for me but if it helps me to recover there is no putting a price on that really) To everyone going through this or other themes I know what a huge struggle it is and keep going!! Sam, bless your heart Thank you so much for your courage and know that you are surely helping others I found your video really helpful and it’s inspiring to see that recovery is possible Thank you so much !!!
Absolutely cracking video. Suffered on and off with this for over 30 years without a diagnosis. It reared it's ugly head of late. Unconditional acceptance is the new tool which I was unaware of. Thanks for taking the time as you are no doubt literally saving lives, make no mistake about that.
It's mainly completely innocent people suffer from it crossed with internal tourets that's a dangerous combination mainly for your own safety as it's usually misunderstood by people who get the wrong idea when in fact it's actually the total opposite
Thanks for this video! I was sexually abused as a child and when I told my family nearly 23 years later my brain latched onto the thought that I'd turn out like him and I was terrified. I'm now nearly 27 and I'm doing much better now, it does creep back up on me at times but I don't try to fight it I just let my brain throw up what it wants! I do need to work on my irrational beliefs though!
I'm 15 and I feel like my life is already over because of this. Not professionally diagnosed because of my family doesn't believes in things like these so I have no choice but to self diagnose (even though it's not the best thing to do) and recover by my own by watching different people talking about this specific theme in ocd. It's really hard I've had times where I just want to end all my sufferings afraid that one day I might just act on those thoughts or start to like them. It's hard I feel like I'm all alone
You are not alone ! I recovered once from pocd it’s back but I know I can do it again! Just remember the fact you are so scared and bothered by these thoughts it’s because they are the opposite of you. P people would like the thoughts but we don’t.
@@chelzyramirez3663 thank you so much 🥺 doing much fine these days just letting the brain do its own thing and trying to recover by letting the anxiety sit there while going on with my day. I really appreciate this comment💕
@@aqebrax I’m so much better I forget about the thoughts it comes and goes but I can easily forget them and it doesn’t bother me as much at all like from 1-10 it bothers me a 2
@@chelzyramirez3663 oh nice, i wonder what type of groinal responses u had, because thats the only thing that keeps me back from recovery, i never got erect or was satisfied. When i have these thoughts i sweat 2 liters and m hearts feel like its gonna explode, idk how to stop these can u help
Great video, thanks for being open and honest about your experiences, it definitely gives sufferers hope. I’m a 25 year old male that’s been dealing with POCD for about 6 months now. I have made some progress, as in not having anxiety attacks every day anymore, but really the hardest part for me is accepting groinal responses. It feels so wrong and immoral that it just bothers me to my core so I try to figure out why it’s happening. Probably the biggest thing that’s keeping me stuck. Alongside that is the chronic guilt and shame; how can I be a good person like I want to be, if I could be this horrible monster, and here’s the groinal responses as “proof” that I am said monster. I just want to be a good person, but this guilt and shame has me weighed down so much. If your available to message I’d really love to get your advice and pick your brain about some things in regards to your personal struggle with pocd and how you’ve managed to climb out of the roughest parts of it. Feel free to message me here on TH-cam if you can! Anyhow, thanks again for being a brave soul and showing the world we’re not all perfect.
It might be useful to remember that the groinal responses are purely a result of your subconscious hyper awareness of that part of your body. I like to think of it as have you ever had it where you’ve noticed a scratch on your hand that you’ve no idea where it came from, but all of a sudden because you’re thinking about it, it starts stinging? It’s like that, it can be put down to science. What helps me is to fully expect it and accept that it’s ok, it’s the ocd part of my brain whirring away, and while it can be uncomfortable, coming to expect it makes it less frightening and powerful
This is my first time ever writing a comment on something like this because I've always been afraid someone I know might see it one day. You really explained this in depth and I really appreciate that because it's a very taboo subject in society so thank you for sharing this. I have a massive fear of being run out my house if it was real, going to prison. I know someone who made mistakes when she was 18/19 and I don't look at her any differently because I think you were a stupid young person, hopefully you've learned the right and wrongs of that and it's taught you something in life. I can't give myself that same compassion though because I worry so much about what others would say, what they would think. I worry about God hating me and I was never into religion up until recently because of all this. Feeling like I don't deserve anything, I've lost sincere happiness and sometimes I feel scared to let myself be happy incase it is actually real and I don't deserve to be for that reason. It's a very scary thing so thank you for sharing your story!.
For 6 years I suffered from HOCD, but now I'm developing another theme that I'm not even sure if it's even OCD, I think I might have POCD, I started to be afraid that I might be attracted to little children, I look at pictures of little girls on the internet to see what I feel, I have intrusive thoughts but not as often as with HOCD and I think they are not as bothersome, I feel the urge to want to do something with them, but it doesn't seem forced , it's like I really want this, I then start to sound and feel my body get hotter, I can't tell if I'm really attracted to kids or if it's just POCD, I don't want to be a monster and I want to be attracted to girls my age, help!
The worst part is that when you have to accept every scenario when having pocd. Its hard to come in peace with. If my pocd would be true i would take suicide so how can i just let it be?
It is difficult indeed but suicide ends all hope. We have been given this one life on a random rock in the universe. We can do our best to recover and live life on our own terms! Don't give up hope, recovery is possible. Others have recovered and so can you. :)
i really appreciate you going into the steps you took to get to where you are today and genuinely this video has helped me realise i do need to put in the work if i want to get the benefits in the future. thanks so much!
I can accept myself if I was what my brain was making think I am. It’s just that my friends and family would hate me and never accept me. I also don’t know if what I did actually caused pOCD or if I’m the real thing. I just need confirmation on that and I can begin to heal.
The search for that certainty can and almost always does feed ocd, what it can do is say if you found what you thought was certainty, it’ll say ‘but what about this? Or what about this?’ What is more useful to recovery is learning that you don’t really need to know for absolute certain, I mean how certain are we about anything in life?
@@axonhealth absolutely agree. My primary OCD is health.. but I've had sexuality based, ROCD, Harm OCD.. and totally they all feel awful.. my personal experience and this was the worst in terms of the shame.. but yes I agree.
Intrusive thoughts happen to all humans whether you have OCD or not. What separates OCD sufferers from others is how they react to those thoughts and obsess about them. We can certainly work on how we react to them to live what we would consider a "normal" life. :)
@@softball9180 that I apparently put my niece on our old softa we no longer have and moving her skin to looked at her clit and that’s literally it before it use to be this thought then it changed to me apparently touching her in another way and then back to this again
@@danielleksimpson1926 have you thought about seeing a therapist? They could really help you to get better at recognising false memories and handling them
You can join the OCD Recovery Group on Facebook (linked in the description of the video) where you are free to ask any questions and ask for advice regarding whatever theme you have. :)
im 18 myself and i feel weird and creepy for liking 16 year old girls most people and scoiety wouldnt care about that age gap but i get guilt and pocd.
It's a complete manipulation of the thoughts and senses... It's a lie, a crossing of neural pathways which the ocd uses to push you back into compulsive obsessing. Remember ocd is an illness that wishes to keep you in the dear cycle.... And it controls your thoughts and nervous system... It's all a lie.
This is the first time I'm hearing this. I kidnda have the same thing obviously I have extreme anxiety from it 😭 the problem is itst taking any memories of when I watched p*rn and twist those to make me think wrong things. I hate that so much.
It hurts so much. It makes you think back to your past, finding signs of anything that could be seen as what you're afraid of being. It makes you wonder who you really are and if you're actually a good person.
Watching this balling my eyes out for my younger self who had no idea what the hell was going on, had never heard of anything like this and felt so trapped alone and utterly utterly terrified. feeling such relief watching this as OCD has reared its ugly head of late due to coming off medication. I really hope you know how many people you are helping with this. It’s absolutely incredible and so brave of you. I can’t thank you enough. Thank you thank you thank you 🙏
Thank you so much for your courage in opening up about this issue;
I rarely comment on videos but felt to under this one because I want to applaud you in talking about this in order to help others but also because I’ve never told anyone explicitly that I suffer from this OCD theme, which as a mother is tremendously difficult and I cannot describe the hell it was to be going through it and having no idea what POCD was - finding out this was a theme and seeing that my ego dystonic intrusive thoughts and unwanted images and everything this involves is a genuine experience others go through; I’d felt so alone and know in all honesty I’m not that and I’m not these unwanted thoughts - which are themselves traumatic for me. I’ve only in the last few weeks discovered this and found the advice for intrusive thoughts concerning cognitive difussion and therapeutic surrender , ACT acceptance and ERP.
I suffer with Harm OCD themes and sensory motor themes in relation to my otter themes and my head feels like a tangled mess; but for the first time in a few years , including a mental breakdown and time in a psychiatric ward hospital while I went through this without knowing what it was - I finally realise I can stop fighting these thoughts and trying to block which makes it worse.
I need to allow and since finding out this theme exists I’m being medicated for ocd and was inspired to be able to communicate properly with the professionals working with me on the NHS.
I’m new to knowing this exists and if it wasn’t for the bravery of people like you in opening up about it how much longer might I have gone before understanding this is a genuine condition and finding resources like this which follow the cognitive difusion and ERP route for OCD.
I’ve been obsessively researching it but largely because I genuinely wish to be well informed for the best hopes of recovery and healing.
Since knowing there are others and that this is a genuine condition I’ve been able to respond with less extreme distress to the intrusive thoughts and label them for what they are.
OCD really does target everything we hold dear and the intrusive thoughts can be ever so painful.
I’ve been able to hug and act more normally with my son, been taking him swimming and not be avoiding in my behaviours already which means I least can function better.
I’ve not been responding to the intrusive thoughts in the same ways and though I’m still in the midst of everything my distress levels are much better than they have been.
I’m so grateful to you and all those putting out decent content to help people with ocd and related disorders.
To a degree I can’t quite express.
I’m considering ‘ocd recovery’ for that extra mile in my recovery (I need to be able to finance it too, I have little so it’s a big decision for me but if it helps me to recover there is no putting a price on that really)
To everyone going through this or other themes
I know what a huge struggle it is and keep going!!
Sam, bless your heart
Thank you so much for your courage and know that you are surely helping others
I found your video really helpful and it’s inspiring to see that recovery is possible
Thank you so much !!!
Thank you so much!
Absolutely cracking video. Suffered on and off with this for over 30 years without a diagnosis. It reared it's ugly head of late. Unconditional acceptance is the new tool which I was unaware of. Thanks for taking the time as you are no doubt literally saving lives, make no mistake about that.
It's mainly completely innocent people suffer from it crossed with internal tourets that's a dangerous combination mainly for your own safety as it's usually misunderstood by people who get the wrong idea when in fact it's actually the total opposite
Thanks for this video! I was sexually abused as a child and when I told my family nearly 23 years later my brain latched onto the thought that I'd turn out like him and I was terrified. I'm now nearly 27 and I'm doing much better now, it does creep back up on me at times but I don't try to fight it I just let my brain throw up what it wants! I do need to work on my irrational beliefs though!
Watch Momin’s video on trauma on this channel I think you will find it helpful relating to this.
@@OCDRecovery I will do, thank you!
love u, the fact that u are here means you u r on the right path
Your so brave and this will help so many ♥️
@@veronicabarnecutt7462 Thank you so much! ❤️
I'm 15 and I feel like my life is already over because of this. Not professionally diagnosed because of my family doesn't believes in things like these so I have no choice but to self diagnose (even though it's not the best thing to do) and recover by my own by watching different people talking about this specific theme in ocd. It's really hard I've had times where I just want to end all my sufferings afraid that one day I might just act on those thoughts or start to like them. It's hard I feel like I'm all alone
You are not alone ! I recovered once from pocd it’s back but I know I can do it again! Just remember the fact you are so scared and bothered by these thoughts it’s because they are the opposite of you. P people would like the thoughts but we don’t.
@@chelzyramirez3663 thank you so much 🥺 doing much fine these days just letting the brain do its own thing and trying to recover by letting the anxiety sit there while going on with my day. I really appreciate this comment💕
@@chelzyramirez3663 how are u now
@@aqebrax I’m so much better I forget about the thoughts it comes and goes but I can easily forget them and it doesn’t bother me as much at all like from 1-10 it bothers me a 2
@@chelzyramirez3663 oh nice, i wonder what type of groinal responses u had, because thats the only thing that keeps me back from recovery, i never got erect or was satisfied. When i have these thoughts i sweat 2 liters and m hearts feel like its gonna explode, idk how to stop these can u help
Great video, thanks for being open and honest about your experiences, it definitely gives sufferers hope.
I’m a 25 year old male that’s been dealing with POCD for about 6 months now. I have made some progress, as in not having anxiety attacks every day anymore, but really the hardest part for me is accepting groinal responses. It feels so wrong and immoral that it just bothers me to my core so I try to figure out why it’s happening. Probably the biggest thing that’s keeping me stuck.
Alongside that is the chronic guilt and shame; how can I be a good person like I want to be, if I could be this horrible monster, and here’s the groinal responses as “proof” that I am said monster.
I just want to be a good person, but this guilt and shame has me weighed down so much.
If your available to message I’d really love to get your advice and pick your brain about some things in regards to your personal struggle with pocd and how you’ve managed to climb out of the roughest parts of it.
Feel free to message me here on TH-cam if you can!
Anyhow, thanks again for being a brave soul and showing the world we’re not all perfect.
It might be useful to remember that the groinal responses are purely a result of your subconscious hyper awareness of that part of your body. I like to think of it as have you ever had it where you’ve noticed a scratch on your hand that you’ve no idea where it came from, but all of a sudden because you’re thinking about it, it starts stinging? It’s like that, it can be put down to science. What helps me is to fully expect it and accept that it’s ok, it’s the ocd part of my brain whirring away, and while it can be uncomfortable, coming to expect it makes it less frightening and powerful
this is helping me so much, i can't thank you enough!
This is my first time ever writing a comment on something like this because I've always been afraid someone I know might see it one day. You really explained this in depth and I really appreciate that because it's a very taboo subject in society so thank you for sharing this. I have a massive fear of being run out my house if it was real, going to prison. I know someone who made mistakes when she was 18/19 and I don't look at her any differently because I think you were a stupid young person, hopefully you've learned the right and wrongs of that and it's taught you something in life. I can't give myself that same compassion though because I worry so much about what others would say, what they would think. I worry about God hating me and I was never into religion up until recently because of all this. Feeling like I don't deserve anything, I've lost sincere happiness and sometimes I feel scared to let myself be happy incase it is actually real and I don't deserve to be for that reason. It's a very scary thing so thank you for sharing your story!.
👏👏👏
For 6 years I suffered from HOCD, but now I'm developing another theme that I'm not even sure if it's even OCD, I think I might have POCD, I started to be afraid that I might be attracted to little children, I look at pictures of little girls on the internet to see what I feel, I have intrusive thoughts but not as often as with HOCD and I think they are not as bothersome, I feel the urge to want to do something with them, but it doesn't seem forced , it's like I really want this, I then start to sound and feel my body get hotter, I can't tell if I'm really attracted to kids or if it's just POCD, I don't want to be a monster and I want to be attracted to girls my age, help!
Thank you so much ❤
The worst part is that when you have to accept every scenario when having pocd. Its hard to come in peace with. If my pocd would be true i would take suicide so how can i just let it be?
It is difficult indeed but suicide ends all hope. We have been given this one life on a random rock in the universe. We can do our best to recover and live life on our own terms! Don't give up hope, recovery is possible. Others have recovered and so can you. :)
And bro you are not your thoughs we all have intrusive thoughts you are not your actions
@@mominmasood suicide ends all suffering too
How are you getting on now ? Hope your ok
💯💯 This is important Keep up the good work mate
Thank you so much for this!
You’re welcome Luke! 😊
very grateful for your videos sam! i relate a lot to your journey :)
i really appreciate you going into the steps you took to get to where you are today and genuinely this video has helped me realise i do need to put in the work if i want to get the benefits in the future. thanks so much!
Awesome video buddy! Always great content!!
I can accept myself if I was what my brain was making think I am. It’s just that my friends and family would hate me and never accept me. I also don’t know if what I did actually caused pOCD or if I’m the real thing. I just need confirmation on that and I can begin to heal.
The search for that certainty can and almost always does feed ocd, what it can do is say if you found what you thought was certainty, it’ll say ‘but what about this? Or what about this?’ What is more useful to recovery is learning that you don’t really need to know for absolute certain, I mean how certain are we about anything in life?
The absolute worst of all the obsessions.. no doubt
Hey friend! All obsessions seem the worst to the Individual :) compassion for all sufferers, no need to compare suffering!
@@axonhealth absolutely agree. My primary OCD is health.. but I've had sexuality based, ROCD, Harm OCD.. and totally they all feel awful.. my personal experience and this was the worst in terms of the shame.. but yes I agree.
@@Mawo3pg I can totally understand that! I hope recovery is going well💪
Are you still struggling with this? I’m worried and if I could talk with you on Instagram that’d be awesome!
@@axonhealth totally agre
Groinal Response is the worst thing for me in pocd... Any advice? cant just let them be...
Oliver Vesey has done a video on this channel on groinal responses that might be helpful. :)
Very helpful thank you!
Does it ever fully go away
*Does it ever fully go away or does it just get easier to deal with*
Intrusive thoughts happen to all humans whether you have OCD or not. What separates OCD sufferers from others is how they react to those thoughts and obsess about them. We can certainly work on how we react to them to live what we would consider a "normal" life. :)
Mine is giving me false memories
What kind of false memories do u have?
@@softball9180 that I apparently put my niece on our old softa we no longer have and moving her skin to looked at her clit and that’s literally it before it use to be this thought then it changed to me apparently touching her in another way and then back to this again
@@danielleksimpson1926 have you thought about seeing a therapist? They could really help you to get better at recognising false memories and handling them
Is there anyway I can message you?
You can join the OCD Recovery Group on Facebook (linked in the description of the video) where you are free to ask any questions and ask for advice regarding whatever theme you have. :)
im 18 myself and i feel weird and creepy for liking 16 year old girls most people and scoiety wouldnt care about that age gap but i get guilt and pocd.
Could I talk to you
Can POCD make you feel attracted to intrusive images even when it gives you anxiety?
Yes that's how it makes it feel like. It feels very real in the moment. Unconditional self-acceptance and exposures would help bring the fear down.
It's a complete manipulation of the thoughts and senses... It's a lie, a crossing of neural pathways which the ocd uses to push you back into compulsive obsessing.
Remember ocd is an illness that wishes to keep you in the dear cycle.... And it controls your thoughts and nervous system... It's all a lie.
This is the first time I'm hearing this. I kidnda have the same thing obviously I have extreme anxiety from it 😭 the problem is itst taking any memories of when I watched p*rn and twist those to make me think wrong things. I hate that so much.
Did you go to therapy?