My relationship was one sided. I gave everything and they left me monkey branches. I guess God stepped in. I didn't lose anything. Good for them, I wish them the best.
I think i have watched this video like 10 times! Very hard to walk away sometimes when the person keeps giving you breadcrumbs to string you along. But at some point you have to realize they will never come around. One sided relationships damage you if you let it keep going on and on!
Zhara Moreira I completely understand. It’s so hard when it goes against everything in you at the moment. I still have days where I miss him and days where I’m mad. Eventually I will date again, but I will hopefully learn my lesson and see the signs. Do not keep falling for words! Glad you saw the light also :)
This has been one of their most valuable videos for me. . It was excruciatingly hard to leave but between the bread crumbs, there was manipulation, gaslighting, double standards, and shifting blame for the problem on me. Saved my sanity and left.
Craig and Margaret here is one for you to remember....I had a VERY wise therapist named Joy she always told me this when I was struggling to let go. she said Loree " you have to do what is HEALTHY and your feelings will catch up!! Yup she was so right I have applied this in situations over and over, It the relationship is toxic walk away your feelings will catch up!!!! Try it everyone:)
@@liberalmadness7248 Yep. I find it really hard to relate with any of the comments in this type of videos. Except two or three the vast majority are playing the victim in absolute terms, pretending to be saints who encountered the devil, blaming others, abusing of psychological terms trying to diagnose their exes and the most unhealthy attitude of all: self-entitlement.
I disagree with "whenever you're ready". For me that is still giving them power, that they can take their time and I'll be sitting here waiting like a dog. I don't think telling an ex I'll be waiting is a good idea at all. My person wanted space, but instead of telling me, just ghosted. Left me in a state of anxiety. I was sending so many messages, desperate to get them back. We had only been in a relationship for a few weeks, but have known each other for over half a year. I decided to have a phone conversation, say how I felt in response to being called obsessed and unsteady. Didn't even seem to understand why I was upset going from speaking morning noon and night for weeks, spending time together on the beach, dinner, drinks, etc...to zero. No explanation. Why would I say I'll be here waiting? No thank you. I got ghosted. I said goodbye. Now I am in no contact. Trying to stay strong. Currently in day 3. Wish me luck! Love from Stockholm Sweden
I am in the same situation. 1 week no contact. He just stopped talking to me after an argument because I found out he’s been lying about so many things. He’s very avoidant and I think it’s time to move on. I love him, so I must set him free.
@@rayc9899 in my case he was emotionally unavailable after a relationship of 9years with his ex. He wasnt ready and he made me waste 18 precious months of my life so yes i guess hes sick since hes unable to consider people s feeling. I feel so guilty for having been such a fool. He lied and cheated he broke my heart. And now i have to forget about all this its sooo easy for him he never loved me.
Nadia Campbell Hi, I started doing meditation and reading a lot of books, articles about narcissism and giving love to myself. After a while I noticed a change from THE INSIDE OUT, that gave me the strength that I needed. Still separated with my emotional rollercoaster, but working on MYSELF. Already found a job and welcoming the UNKOWN. Living day by day... IT IS NOT EASY BUT I’M FINALLY FREE. 💜
Coach Craig Kenneth the video looks great and is a noticeable improvement! But I agree with the comments about audio quality; I’ve always wondered why you don’t use a lapel mic and eliminate the echo. Thank you for all of the great content on your channel.
It’s important to know that walking away isn’t a ploy to get someone back. If you walk away you are doing so for yourself. I think if you get to this stage, it’s very likely a point of no return. If they could be better, they wouldn’t risk losing you. Also, maybe they ‘see the light’, but I would question: for how long? Moral of the story: walking away is for yourself! (To avoid more of the same in the vast majority of cases). Really like your vid!!! Great message.
Great video! One-sided, non reciprocal relationships are devastating. The worst part is if it is a long term one. It gradual, then one day it is like slamming into a thick brick wall. Walking away and letting them go is a MUST DO for your mental well being and repair to your soul. Hope this was helpful.
This is great! My absence can be very LOUD! I know she misses me during this no contact now. She is posting online "What should I do if I still have feelings for my ex and I want him back?" And it is now 8 days before Christmas. She broke up with me and the rebound guy has dumped her. For the past four years we were wrapping Christmas gifts and romancing by the Christmas tree. Now she is alone and having detachment anxiety. She wanted the break up. But hey... Absence is POWERFUL!
@@jiliangarcia6273 I know (finally). How the balance of power has shifted. From the dumper to the dumpee! Now I have to decide whether I want her back. When she shows up. After I have done so much intensive self improvement. Is she worth it?
@@Genos0589 After doing so much self improvement as Coach Craig instructed, this morning my credit score spiked. Now I am able to attain the investments I always wanted. Improving my financial status. And my net worth drastically. Now I have better things to think of than her. She can take a number and stand in line. Or not.
@@jinxlee8556 good for you man, just focus on yourself, don't mind those women. they will crawling back to you once you have your financial freedom and abundance.
I saw this video at the perfect time 💗 Walking away from someone who is so little effort and continues to disrespect me by not truly listening to me and my needs . So one sided, I have to ask myself what in the hell do I even like about him enough to keep allowing this behavior? Thank you Craig & Margaret, much love to you both 💜💜💜
I walked away 3 days ago... im hurting so bad, I saw him as my divine partner, but he was not sure about the future. No arguments, just wished him well and explained that I was attaching to an outcome and giving too much of myself. We both cried. He needs to decide what he wants for himself and its best he does that alone! If its meant to be, it will be. If not, then I did the right thing. 🙏 we said goodbye for now, but not forever. We both had upbringing where we more or less fended for ourselves and not nurtured, but criticised.
@@libragirl5533 yeah ok… still just friends and check in with each other every few weeks to see both doing ok. No relationship though! That’s not going to happen. 🌸
Thank you so much. Although I'm the person my ex ran away from, this still gave me light on the mistakes I did like neglecting her needs and treating her badly. I stopped chasing her as I realized that was selfish. I let her go but made sure to say sorry for all the mistakes I've done.
That was me trying to hold on to someone that had gone a long time ago and was feeding me bread crumbs but I'm glad I made a decision to walk away and it feels so good
This hit me pretty hard. I was the person being walked away from in my situation. Nothing hurt more than realising my own mistakes too late to fix them. She tried telling me and telling me and I never listened. It’s been many, many months now and she has completely cut herself loose from my life. Not heard from her even once. It’s like she no longer exists. Or I no longer exist to her. I’ve accepted the fact that she’s not coming back, but the pain, the guilt, the hurt she’s left me with has been unbearable. I’ve reached out maybe 4/5 times just to talk, not even fight for her back. I just want to talk and discuss things, part ways amicably. Allow me to explain myself and tell her I understand. But every message is left with no reply, not even opened. Honestly, I don’t even feel like I deserve this any more. I’ve learned my lesson but it’s so cruel to cut someone off this abruptly and for this length of time. It’s like, I get it, it’s over, you’re gone.. but can we at least talk it out so I don’t wake up feeling like an absolute piece of shit any more?
Thanks Coaches, you helped me get my ex back BUT he is not mentally well and cannot handle a healthy relationship. So, you have helped me realize that it's ok to let go as well. I love you guys💙💙
Walk away it's the best decision when they don't care about your needs and sometimes we hope this person will change and take you back but they don't. I just hope one day they will realized what they done was no nice to hurt the one who really love you.
This channel has helped me so much in the past. My first couple months of my break up were me desperately trying to get back with my ex. With time I slowly learned that I was tired, feeling unappreciated and knew I deserved better. #1 rule is to value yourself! My ex can suck it!
Idk if you get much monetary compensation from this channel, but know that you are really helping people so give yourself a pat on the back and a hug from me. I'm in the middle of a breakup and my wife controls the money in the house so I don't really have the funds for therapy plus our children get any extra money I have. Your channel has really helped me and when I'm laying there at night for hours on end feeling miserable, your advice has been very helpful.
I agree with many of the comments. But we have to remember at any given time our partners can pull the plug on the relationship. So can we. But we can LIVE without them. Don't give them your power. Even if you have to stay busy 16 hours a day and sleep the other 8. Love yourself I was in a break up last year but I refused to miss work over it. I went to therapy and I am a therapist. We need help too. Again we have to mourn the break up but remember your worth. I had a beautiful relationship however he walked away devastating me. Try to love yourself. I traveled, went to therapy, exercised, prayed and journal. One year later I'm doing really great. I have not dated yet but I know other great man truly exists. Know your worth and it will take time but you will feel better.
Margaret is so right about self love...it takes work especially when you didnt hear positive affirmations from your parents when you were a child..when you have a lot of trauma attached to you...it takes a lot of work to get to the point where you love yourself.
You can love someone and still choose to say goodbye to them. You can miss a person every day, and still be glad they're no longer in your life. ～ Oprah Winfrey Thank you so much coach Margaret and coach Graig for sharing the wisdom and making these videos. This video and “10 questions to ask yourself (self love)” and “10 things man will do if he loved you” are a great boosters to shift my mind on healing journey and also make Oprah‘s advice much easier to achieve💕
I told her I wasn’t interested in being just friends and to let me know if she changes her mind and we can talk. She said that’s all she had to offer and said “bye”. I guess I’m walking away!
I was listening to a video literally a few days ago and it was so interesting and so good we all are hurting but I think the people that are actually commenting and watching these videos are the true gems and I will tell you why we are the type of people that we would have never left our Partners we would have sat down came up with some type of solution but these other individuals did they actually hold our hand and talk to us and let us know the problem in a calm way loving respectful or did they yell at us and blame us for everything and what did they do at the end of the day they just left us and now we're sitting here with our hearts broken the only thing you can do is get your dignity and your respect back and your power back by walking away and never looking back if these people really want you they will find you no matter what you do they will find you if you want to get someone's attention you must remove yours
Gash this videos is literally giving me the validation that i did the right thing no matter how much its hurting me every day. And i know my ex would never see their mistakes and realize why i walked away. He would alwaya think that its all my fault.
You have to love yourself first.... that one went straight to my battered and bruised heart. Thanks Margaret and Craig. Working from home and watching your videos non-stop.
The best of what i have listened to.. After 8 month of breaking up with me, she came back. We fixed things but she still had the chance to control me, i had enough of it and decided to walk away.. I hope it works.
I spend so much time watching your videos, and I love the work you both do. Unfortunately I can't afford any form of coaching from you at the moment and I've made so many mistakes with my ex that you wouldn't believe. But your videos help keep my spirits up and really help me understand myself better and understand the breakup better. I'm in a hopeless position with my ex to be completely honest, I feel that she truly resents and hates me, but your videos help me believe there's light at the end of the tunnel, even though I don't think I'll ever get my ex back. For that, I sincerely thank you. If I ever get a sudden surge of funds I will definitely be scheduling a session with you and purchase your workbooks. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. ❤️
I so needed this video! My narcissistic ex just texted me and tried hovering me for the third time in two months, and I needed some guidance so that I didn’t make another stupid decision! Lol! My relationship gurus come through again! 🙌🏻👏🏻💪🏻
Brittany Rae I'm exactly in the same situation. Except she has contacted me 3 times in a month. Last one destabilized me, i must admit. The typical "I love you and miss you". But i did not reply. We need to stay strong. Wish you, and all you guys in the comments, the best.
My ex was so insecure that control was the only thing they knew. I had no choice then to walk away because I was drained of my well-being. My needs were never met. It was all about them and their lies. It was exhausting. Every single point Craig and Barbers touched on here was present. I loved myself too much to stay any longer. It’s so important to love yourself. You’re no good for anyone if you’re not good to yourself first! I clearly attracted a bad person because I didn’t love myself enough in the beginning. It was a hard lesson, but an essential one. I’m grateful for the experience because now I know my value and will never give my power away to anyone who isn’t healthy enough in themself to value me back.
Thank you for the advice! I walked away for almost all of the exact reasons you stated. This person was emotionally damaged and I could not fix him. I decided that I loved myself more.
The only thing I lost from the most toxic 8 month relationship I've ever experienced was myself and self respect. She was constantly talking to other men and then cheated on me..the cardinal sin. Once I found this out I've walked away for good. As heart breaking as it is they did me a favour. Life is so short wasting time on dead wood
Hi! Walking away is hard but so worth it. I know my value and I am lucky to have cool friends who keep me busy with fun activities. Consequently, when I feel like I am being taken for granted by someone I dip into my pool of other friends and live my life.
Thanks for this video. Just found out on my 2nd week of No Contact that my Narc ex has already moved on, possibly before he discarded me. It hurts like hell bc of the love loyalty sacrifices I made for this man. Learning to let go and be okay with it. Every time it hits me, I cry and pray it out. I believe its gonna get better. Thanks for the great info...❤❤❤
Craig i just wanna thank you for everything. I used your knowledge and advice to get my ex back and eventually i did. NC really does work guys! I was with my ex for nearly 2 years and had a split and went into NC for 3 months and she came back! But it turns out things were just not right anymore and their an ex for a reason! I got back with her many times using NC! But now ive decided to walk away and focus on myself. Yes i still miss her but not as much anymore after 3 weeks. Im losing weight, getting a new job and hopefully a new car very soon! Thank you so much Craig Kenneth, God bless!
I loved this video but I love all your videos. I’m going through a tough time at the moment after a break up 4 months ago (2 months no contact). Your videos are helping to make sense of it all.
I deeply care for him he's expressed so many things to me about him personally I realized we both need time to grow but it's a total gentleman he's showing value for me when he sees me in person and he's not much of a phone person but he was trying a little harder than he has lately but anyway God bless you all and I'm also on my knees praying about this one
we were serious for 1.5 years. Same here the quarantine breakup is real. Went 5 weeks with NC... she contacted me and we met up. We talked for about 2 hours. Toward the I felt the vibes starting to be off. She wants to be “friends” I told her my feelings for you is more then friends and I wanted us in a romantic relationship.. she then said I didn’t grow which was total bs she’s only saying that cause she wants to friend zone be and I said I can’t because I like you more then that.. at the end of the day everyone is human and I have feelings also.. time to walk away tbh I really did care but I’m young and healthy. It sucks cause I work with her but she’s leaving for a new college end of 2021 so after that she won’t ever have to see me again.! Life moves on. God bless
god always has a plan for every one Trust believe have faith in God 🙏 you are helping loads of people Out 💯🙏☺️😊👏🙌 Thank u so much May god always give u more health amen 🙏
OMG this is my current relationship, listening to this has pointed out so many more bad points I hadn't even realized I am being put through. Thank you for opening my eyes. 😭😭
A lot of people here are saying “I walked away after so and so left me” that’s not walking away. They’re talking about being the dumper. They’re talking about when you love someone and it’s just not working so you leave. If someone is abusive or just not giving you what you want it’s all you can do. The only thing here is, that person may have ditched you for very good reasons and may wish that you’ve changed but ultimately not want to reach out. So for all of you doing no contact I hope you do reach out eventually if you feel you did something wrong and have changed / learned from it, (maybe from work books or this channel or whatever) if you’re still interested. I had to say goodbye to someone recently. I wanted them to change but I also knew I couldn’t wait for that.(I hope they will change, better themselves and come find me) but personally I will not be ever contacting them again. I am the dumper and I am doing permanent NC. Maybe this is easier because my relationship was non committal and only 4 months. But we met a lot and spent a lot of time together so I would like to think it counts for some psychological attachment + walking away is very loud. I feel most people posting here had very long and serious relationships and this advice is for such people. Maybe I don’t really have a chance but I’ve already started going to the gym and accepting other dates anyway.
I'm in the same situation the guy decided to walk away because he said I was being to hot and cold I will admit I was a bit off with him because I was confused on how he felt about me when I should of just went with the flow, I would love another chance with him. Really disappointing because we really liked each other I even met all his family!! Is he just doing this to see how much I care? I'm not even interested in dating anyone else but I don't want to blow my chances and look desperate reaching out to him. Any advice?
If you listen to the video it covers both. It also covers the dumpee walking away after the dumper hurt them. Showing self respect and knowing that this other person (dumper) won’t try to talk like adults so you must walk away.
@@ryze2499 Yep I'm on that boat, I tried talking to him after he dumped me gave him a chance just incase he regretted his decision because I did like him and he did say he would Prob regret dumping me but he wasn't making the effort back and didn't show much interest so time to have some self respect, He won't hear from me again. Disappointed at how the relationship went but life goes on.
Nobody taught us this knowledge, it is not have been charted, i dont know why. Until today we found coaches like you, we have hope to restablish our sanity. Thanks.
I walked away after he said it’s over and not to message me. I kept my dignity and never message back. It’s almost 6 weeks almost I see him in gym but I totally don’t care
With all due respect, I, too, disagree with, "Whenever you're ready..." From my perspective, those words are not self-love. They are self-hate. Where is the healthy boundary? Standard? Giving them all the control and putting ourselves on ice for an indefinite amount of time at their convenience so they can cheat in peace while we sit and worry or get busier living our fullest life when they should be working on themselves and, hopefully, therefore, the relationship was bad advice. The rest of the video was exceptional. The aforementioned blanket statement gives all our power away. Time to negotiate and/or lay the terms and conditions down in a loving way for both parties not just setting up a dangerous, one-sided precedent. Thank you. Stay safe. God bless.
This is my second day dealing with my break up, it is too sudden that I am not prepared ,I do not exactly know what to do. I cry every time I remember the good old days. You cannot imagine everything I have done for him. I took care of him from head to foot, in sickness and in health, I was there for him. I DID AND GAVE EVERYTHING to him... We planned the future together- our kids, home and the life we will have in the future... I am questioning my worth now...He said I was a very good woman, I am...His reasons to break up is that I have a gluey love, that I love too greatly (yes I did, I made him feel loved from head to foot)...That he wants a partnership without great feelings. I asked him why did he just broke up earlier of our relationship and not to pretend that he loved me for all this time??? I believed him with all my heart and soul, I felt like used, I felt like an object that after being exhausted will be thrown. I keep asking God, why it has to happen to me? I am totally down and lost, I dont know how to pick myself up from this brokenness. I begged him to give us a chance but he was determined to walk away. I am in no contact phase, it helps but I have the strong urge to message him every time and ask why again. I am so down... I did love myself before I met him, but I was blinded by my love for him that I did forget that.
I completely understand also talked about marriage, moving in together and even thought of names for our future kids. We were together for 3 years. He broke up with me a month ago saying he wasn't ready for any of that and I literally cried everyday up until today. I still love him but honestly it seems like he's moved on already and no longer loves me and it's strange because he was the one who broke up with me but he's been so cruel to me and ignores me. We work together but I am planning to move to a different location soon. I am slowly starting to tell myself I need to move on. And like you I still have no idea what to do, I love him so much and I'm confused on what happened. It's definitely not easy but everyday I try to think of something happy even if it's me waking up in the morning or seeing a beautiful flower. I hope the both of us are able to become happy again soon.
@@peachblossom.phlox3403 Praying for our hearts to heal soon. We just gave our hearts to the wrong people. As someone said to me, we are capable to be loved and and stood by, no matter what the circumstances are. It would be really good for you to be in a new environment, stay strong and always remember that I keep praying for you. Everything will be ok. Sending my hugs to you.
I think that when you respond to breadcrumbs it helps them wean themselves off you. Its so cruel because it gives you hope that they're "reaching out".
Their anxiety got the better of them. Once you understand that, you can use it against them. Don’t reply ..at all. Until they write they miss you and want to see you, keep the NC.
You and Margaret are the best! I have learned so much from the videos. Learning to respect and stand up for myself. I left a year and 5 months ago and going through divorce now. One nice thing I will say about myself is I am a loyal person who gives my all in a relationship.
He walked away from. Me out of manipulation, I had no choice but went on NC He reached out to me 6 weeks later, I took him. Back but nothing has changed much. This time I walked away from. Him in silence and blocked him. I felt I was being taken for granted, took me as convenience and breadcrumbed me. I choose ME this time!
Wow I wish I saw this video 2 weeks ago. I asked my ex to meet me today cause I didn’t get to say What I feel when he dumped me. After watching 10 videos of you talking about relationships. Now I feel like I’ll just cancel it and stop contacting him. I feel like I’ll just walk away.
Im all alone , but i believe im mentally strong that’s why i can love myself , its been 3 months she dumped me for our 7years relationship , getting stronger everyday, I won’t let myself suffer for so long . There’s no time to wast , been training so hard and won my kickboxing title fight 2 weeks ago . Today i feel great because she is not the first person on my mind anymore when i wake up . Believe in yourself, love and respect yourself . U deserve better
Hi Coach Craig and Margaret. I may say I am an anxious person. I was in a relationship with my ex gf (we are both Lesbians) where I became so toxic because I was too focused on my frustrations in life to the point that I neglected her needs and emotions, without considering that she is also going through something difficult. But honestly, I gave too much effort in our relationship and I do really love her, I care for her especially when she's sick, I cooked for, I help her out on doing things at home, I surprised her on special occasions, we even love going out on dates going road trips, etc. She broke up with me because I wasn't improving myself in terms of my anxiety. And I guess that was a wake up call. Now I am so desperate to work on myself but I loose a job and broke so I couldn't get a therapy, but I go to counseling that is being offered by our government for free, however it's only for 2 sessions. I started praying everyday consistently and surrendering to God everything I am going through. I started to write down all the bad attitudes and behaviours and tried controlling my emotions because I really want to change for her. I want to get her back. But I am too scared because she's a person who doesn't dwell on past relationships. When we broke up, she told me she still loves me but 2 weeks after I contacted her and she told me she's happy without me and doesn't love me anymore. I am really doing my best now to work on myself even without getting a therapy.
This is probably the most helpful for me of all your videos. One question: when you walk away, the void and sense of loss that you're left with is excruciating. Can you give some advice on how the anxiously attached person can manage the emptiness and panic that follows?
It's only been 2 weeks for me, so who am I to say. But I've been here before and in a bad way. I promised myself never to go there again. He ended it out of the blue. It's hard because a break-up with a bf or gf is viewed differently from a divorce or a death and people are sympathetic for just so long. For us it's devastating. So these are the things that are helping me now and things I hadn't done before to help me keep moving forward: *Feel sad, cry allow it to be okay *Recognize that you will idealize them, and miss all the wonderful times *BUT...then remind yourself of all the times you cried, the times they didn't give you what you need, when you were together but still felt alone *Write a list of ALL the times they let you down and focus on those *Stop giving them so much credit for the little you got instead of all you didn't get *Read your list every time you pine for them *Write all your great qualities down, and remember we are worth so much more and deserve someone who appreciates that in us *Don't contact them, drive by where they live or visit...it only prolongs the healing *Surround yourselves with people with love you *Stay busy *Replace that Mobius strip, the one that plays over and over in your head about how you miss them how you wish it were different like I have so much to offer they're the ones missing out *Put everything that reminds you of them away. I can't throw mine out yet And be okay when you feel like shit but don't stay there for long. We need to remain hopeful, know we are amazing and resilient...we will be okay in time. There has to be someone better for us. Right? Blessing my fellow broken hearted. Oh...take advantage of the bonus weight loss (if ur like me a few lbs over weight). The next guy is gonna be lucky!
Hi coach. It's been awhile. Big fan I want to publicly thank you for helping me. I learned one thing. I will not die if there is a break up. Its true lol. Respect yourself.
Your videos have helped me by being calming and reassuring and I don’t have to involve friends or family too much. I’m just trying to come to better understanding. And dealing with my pain and anxiety from the turn out of what happened . Thank you.
When u try so hard to invest time and it's all about what he wants and its one sided it hurts.. He walks in and out. Yet u cling on so hard.. Decided today to remove his number and keep on walking. I won't lie ill look back and feel sad but deep down he isn't the one 🙁
I had a different experience. I found my ex would pull away and then get angry that I gave them space. They said they wanted me to pull them close when they pulled away. But I also found that if I did try, it never worked. Could never win 🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️
Same for me! No matter what could never win. Gave space , they complained they didn’t see me enough .. was always available they complained they needed time to themselves
To anyone who is here watching this because of a break up. I fell in love and started to date this girl for 5 months, we broke up. I did no contact for about a month and she came back. Everything was good again I was in love until I found out she was talking to someone else or at least trying to cover it up. I walked away, blacked her on everything. The pain is there but I know I’m a good man, and she will never find anyone like me ever. I’m on my own path, and focusing on myself now. In the process I will find someone who knows my worth. ❤️ so to anyone who is hurt, hang in there. Time heals all wounds
Yesterday I walked away after he reached out after three months and said he wanted to remain friends. He has a gf (which is why our close friendship/relationship ended) and I knew I couldn’t do it. So I said no. I couldn’t keep in contact with him. It was hard and I felt bad I said it. Surprisingly he said he’d reach out to me later once I’m ready and try again.
I’m in tears. I had to send a break up message to my bf, i know he’s working hard to keep his job in these times but that gives no excuse to ignore me. The reason i sent a messade is because he never answer a call from me, he reads messages but never answer. An answer could take hours or even none at all. I see him online on Facebook answering other peoples comments but i get jack shit. ”I’m always working” I always have to wait for two weeks or more to hear from him or even see him. He helps other people with things all the time, neighbours and his workcheifs kids with car rides etc, he also spends time with his ex wife cause she is under a cancer treatment. He asks for help from everybody else but me. I’m just so fed up with how he talks so sweetly with other people and being so cold and distant towards me. I love him so much but i can’t deal with all this neglect, it has been going on for months. Duck that guy!
Freaking Fantastic I really started to think that too. I met him on a walk two weeks ago, he was really sad about the situation but i acted like it didn’t matter. He also said that we are still ”friends” but his body language is saying different. I don’t want anything to do with him.
Not necessarily a narc. That requires a clinical diagnosis and is an extremely dangerous and serious mental illness. Sounds more like he's just not that into you and too coward to confront you so he hopes you'll respect yourself enough to get the message in the silence. He's close to ghosting which would be kinder than breadcrumbing. Give yourself closure as he does not seem able to. After you work on the lesson learned, you'll meet a better match. If no work is done, the pattern will simply repeat itself over and over so, please, consider taking better care of yourself and your choices will reflect that. All the best.
This is true with walking away when your needs aren’t met I felt like I wanted to go told my partner I felt like it then she ended up separating from me two months later I tolerated stuff because I lost my self esteem I Was scared to leaves and I should have
Thank you for this. I'm going to watch some other videos. My bf of 18 months just broke up with me...out of the blue. He's a nice man, kind heart, good dad and friend. The time we spent together was easy but he's always struggled opening up. He's had few examples of what a good relationship could be and/or the tools to work towards achieving a happy partnership. Instead he focused on work, saying he didn't know how to make time for us. I recognize his short comings but still I'm left feeling...why can't he see what a great catch he had in me. Maybe I'll find some comfort in other videos.
Yep. I chased and my ex has blocked me completely even by his cell carrier. He is my one true love and I know that I’ve lost him forever. I’ve never felt so much pain. 😥
Stacie Lynn be happy Stacie don’t look back I was in the same situation this is when you have to love yourself. Time will heal all wounds. You need to love yourself first. Be happy with your own mind and thoughts. You will make it through this. I was like you at one point. Trust me it does get better! I’m here for you stay strong! You got this!
Stacie Lynn, did you find a new hot guy yet? I'm currently got my sights on this handsome guy at work. I don't care about my ex anymore. They are dead to me.
I did this about 3 weeks ago. He thought I was bluffing, but when he realized over a week with no words from me... He started chasing. He told me, the entire time we broke up he was expecting my call. "she will call" is what he kept saying to himself. When I didn't he got scared. This method helps in 2 ways 1. If he really loves you he will chase. Only if you are in the right. Don't be acting crazy & expect this from a man. They won't chase. 2. They will never chase, which means they already made this decision long before you broken up. That is ok. Because you have a life to live & someone else to love. So his lost is not the end of you & vice versa. Be happy that you found out early rather than later.
Tough when they have trauma and are more fearful avoidant. She felt she had to leave and at one time said we really comfort each other but trigger each other. Even when i tried to talk and understand she wouldn't so leaves me in the dark. So she left without even trying. I'm also learning the triggers are more about ourselves so it's unfair to put that on others especially without communicating with them. I love her and hope she wants to reconcile. We had some life events that caused extra stress and would be unfortunate for us to leave each other's lives when we really enjoyed one another. Working on my issues to be better for myself and hopefully one day be her mountain.
I never really used to pay attention to my attachment issues until I read “Attached” but since then I’ve watched so much stuff on attachment. The thing about self love Margaret talked about I never really thought about it to much, but my parents sure to criticize me a lot growing up it always felt like more criticism then positivity. It’s not that they didn’t love me but that’s how they were raised but we don’t realize how damaging it is to your self esteem and view of your own value
That is true. Narc takes all the time and energy that we suppose to spend on our loved ones. I won't take back the kind of rubbish that I already put aside.
Craig nice video. I walked away and have bolt up $5,000.00. Now, we are about to go to court. I’ve already put CPS on my ex-narc. About to do an emergency take away of my kids from my ex-narc for child’s school attendance. When all hope and trust has gone. U have to quit fighting. And realize that loving them, is killing u. U have to save urself, before u destroy urself mentally. I have moved on, but I’m protecting my heart now. As times goes on, maybe my new relationship with Lisa will grow. But for now, I’m guarded. Thanks for this video Craig. Because everything CAN NOT be saved and ppl have to know. When to let go.
I am a Mighty Spartan Warrior of Freaking Awesomeness!!! My Majestic Beastness knows no bounds! My humility is as deep as the farthest depths of space and as bright as the scorching sun! My compassion is the unseen aspects of the iceberg and as broad as the horizon eye that can see! I am a man. Mechanically strong and systematically beautiful! My intellect is sharper than cheddar cheese an my wittiness is as light as a feather but does sting like a bee. Being that of pure comedy! I am awesome! I am great! Thy name shall not be taken in vain! I am truth and submerged in life with my experiences as deep as the sea! Self worth is maturity and thy deserve mature people in my life who value me and appreciate me just as I will adore them every minute of the day. Be peace, find love and live stress free! Go forth and conquer with diligence and pride for the day is yours to seize!!! 💪😎👍
I don't think you should say whenever your ready because they think your just waiting for them. It's like a safety net it doesn't create loss at all. They have to think they may never see or hear from you again. That you are willing to walk away forever.
Craig this channel is a godsend!! Ive learned so much from you and the help is unending. Thank for the great and very real videos,Gid bless you and all your work! 💯
I hope she misses me, we’ve been together for 5 years. And married with a baby, she left me 4 months after our daughter was born. I miss her terribly, it’s been 4.5 months
Just under 9 years together she proposed to me after 2 years we have a little boy whos 7 been 2 month since we split have minimal contact due to our son..i made mistakes changing a day at a time.. broke nc today after i dropped her stuff off at her mums an told her mum i still love her an want her back but who knws what will happen..did all the break up wrong beg pleaded for about 6 weeks but kept breakin nc cos im a fool kept tellin her i loved her.... back to nc again..
Hey Craig, Merry christmas to you and your family. i just want to tell you that your videos and Skype had helped me alot. i'm now a new man working on my self development with all the outer stress that is happening in my country. Yes, i'm happy and looking forward to improve myself more and never never enter a relation and have the same issues that i faced before. thank you, Mazen
My wife had walked away from me, kids 26 and 22 , two dogs and stopped paying three mortgages being on jointed names. She had accumulated almost 100k in her personal debt couple of years ago without my knowledge, signed her assets in property's to debt collectors without my knowledge, raped my credit card for years so much so that my life never felt more miserable and depressing. I have also find out about all that just by accident while looking for some other paperworks. My attitude towards her had changed after learnings about what she's done Just 3 months ago she left us blaming me for false behaviour, calling names, being controlling, asking for sex in order for her to see her friends. My life fantasy of having my family together till the day I die is now gone with hers " power of moving away" leaving us in this horrible situation . I work 7 days week as a slave and for some crazy reason still love her even though she ignores me and threatened with the court if I continue to send love messages. Couch Craig, is this something you can help me with just clear my own thoughts since my life really does not make any sense any more?
This video was a Great help for me. Thanks a ton Margret (you are like a mother to me) and Craig for being my saviour in this hard time. Without you two I would have been in deep depression but your videos are saving me in this No Contact period. I have been married since 15years and have two kids. My relationship was also one sided and my partner Is v self obsessed who took me for granted always. But I walked away from that home for a while for my protection. Thanks a lot for motivating me through your videos 🌹lots of love ❤️and hugs 🤗 to you both 👏👏
![[Sub Thai] APT. - ROSÉ & Bruno Mars](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/bYjhzP8x_uc/mqdefault.jpg)
My relationship was one sided. I gave everything and they left me monkey branches. I guess God stepped in. I didn't lose anything. Good for them, I wish them the best.
You didn't lose anything wow that's powerful.
I haven't heard the expression of monkey branches
Amen. Once you step back and assess. No lossess
Good for them? Lol nah don’t make excuses for scumlords
@Michael Pde there is no ONE. Never tell yourself this or you already took the L.
@@nathantrujillo471 💌
I think i have watched this video like 10 times! Very hard to walk away sometimes when the person keeps giving you breadcrumbs to string you along. But at some point you have to realize they will never come around. One sided relationships damage you if you let it keep going on and on!
Zhara Moreira I completely understand. It’s so hard when it goes against everything in you at the moment. I still have days where I miss him and days where I’m mad. Eventually I will date again, but I will hopefully learn my lesson and see the signs. Do not keep falling for words! Glad you saw the light also :)
This has been one of their most valuable videos for me. . It was excruciatingly hard to leave but between the bread crumbs, there was manipulation, gaslighting, double standards, and shifting blame for the problem on me. Saved my sanity and left.
Bread crumbs definitely destroy any hope of a future. Walking is very difficult but needs to be done.
Zhara Moreira me too...same situation
Zhara Moreira I found he was initiating chatting with more than 6 girls...
Felt like u were speaking to me. I’ve been holding on to someone who is ok with letting me go.
Craig and Margaret here is one for you to remember....I had a VERY wise therapist named Joy she always told me this when I was struggling to let go. she said Loree " you have to do what is HEALTHY and your feelings will catch up!! Yup she was so right I have applied this in situations over and over, It the relationship is toxic walk away your feelings will catch up!!!! Try it everyone:)
This is really sage advice. Thanks for sharing
Are you sure you’re not the toxic one?
@@liberalmadness7248 Yep. I find it really hard to relate with any of the comments in this type of videos. Except two or three the vast majority are playing the victim in absolute terms, pretending to be saints who encountered the devil, blaming others, abusing of psychological terms trying to diagnose their exes and the most unhealthy attitude of all: self-entitlement.
I disagree with "whenever you're ready".
For me that is still giving them power, that they can take their time and I'll be sitting here waiting like a dog.
I don't think telling an ex I'll be waiting is a good idea at all.
My person wanted space, but instead of telling me, just ghosted.
Left me in a state of anxiety. I was sending so many messages, desperate to get them back.
We had only been in a relationship for a few weeks, but have known each other for over half a year.
I decided to have a phone conversation, say how I felt in response to being called obsessed and unsteady.
Didn't even seem to understand why I was upset going from speaking morning noon and night for weeks, spending time together on the beach, dinner, drinks, etc...to zero.
No explanation.
Why would I say I'll be here waiting?
No thank you.
I got ghosted. I said goodbye.
Now I am in no contact.
Trying to stay strong.
Currently in day 3.
Wish me luck!
Love from Stockholm Sweden
I am in the same situation. 1 week no contact. He just stopped talking to me after an argument because I found out he’s been lying about so many things. He’s very avoidant and I think it’s time to move on. I love him, so I must set him free.
Stay strong
@@Waytooblonde how are u now
You're saving people by doing this. God bless you
Always walk away from toxic people even if it's your family. If will save you so much pain in the future; there is no hope with them at all.
@@rayc9899 the problèm is that they show their toxicity once you are infatuated. It makes it harder to move on
@@audrey-vf9ef They know what they're doing from the minute they have an eye on you....pure evil, it's a game for them.
They're mentally sick big time, no hope for them. They also want you to believe that you're the one who is sick. ALLO....
@@rayc9899 in my case he was emotionally unavailable after a relationship of 9years with his ex. He wasnt ready and he made me waste 18 precious months of my life so yes i guess hes sick since hes unable to consider people s feeling. I feel so guilty for having been such a fool. He lied and cheated he broke my heart. And now i have to forget about all this its sooo easy for him he never loved me.
After having an AWAKENING I finally decided to leave my marriage of 31 years....Learning to live day by day but very proud of myself. 💜💪🏻
Hi Gloria, how are you doing? How did you do it?
Nadia Campbell Hi, I started doing meditation and reading a lot of books, articles about narcissism and giving love to myself. After a while I noticed a change from THE INSIDE OUT, that gave me the strength that I needed. Still separated with my emotional rollercoaster, but working on MYSELF. Already found a job and welcoming the UNKOWN. Living day by day... IT IS NOT EASY BUT I’M FINALLY FREE. 💜
We have the same name,? Wow!
I’m very proud of you too !!
❤️🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
I got a new computer recently so hopefully it will improve both the sound and video quality of the videos! Let us know if you notice a difference!
Dedicated Lapel microphones will cut down on the echo
you could make a video about teenage relationships
Coach Craig Kenneth the video looks great and is a noticeable improvement! But I agree with the comments about audio quality; I’ve always wondered why you don’t use a lapel mic and eliminate the echo. Thank you for all of the great content on your channel.
Your coaching has been BEYOND helpful to me.
Thank you
Maragret was great. sorry to hear she passed. thank you for these videos
It’s important to know that walking away isn’t a ploy to get someone back. If you walk away you are doing so for yourself.
I think if you get to this stage, it’s very likely a point of no return. If they could be better, they wouldn’t risk losing you.
Also, maybe they ‘see the light’, but I would question: for how long?
Moral of the story: walking away is for yourself! (To avoid more of the same in the vast majority of cases).
Really like your vid!!! Great message.
I just told her i'm walking away in order for me to heal. She does not want me to walk away but i'm the one hurting. Lord please give me strenght!
Same
Did you get back together?
Don't tell them, just do it
You know, I saved myself so much pain this week by walking away from someone who started pulling away. I think I’m finally learning! 🤣
Go, Lisa! I left this past weekend and I feel so proud of myself. Let’s celebrate us! Cheers! 🎉
Same here
Great video! One-sided, non reciprocal relationships are devastating. The worst part is if it is a long term one. It gradual, then one day it is like slamming into a thick brick wall. Walking away and letting them go is a MUST DO for your mental well being and repair to your soul. Hope this was helpful.
This is great! My absence can be very LOUD! I know she misses me during this no contact now. She is posting online "What should I do if I still have feelings for my ex and I want him back?" And it is now 8 days before Christmas. She broke up with me and the rebound guy has dumped her. For the past four years we were wrapping Christmas gifts and romancing by the Christmas tree. Now she is alone and having detachment anxiety. She wanted the break up. But hey... Absence is POWERFUL!
u have the power now bro
@@jiliangarcia6273 I know (finally). How the balance of power has shifted. From the dumper to the dumpee! Now I have to decide whether I want her back. When she shows up. After I have done so much intensive self improvement. Is she worth it?
she wants you back because she was dumped by her rebound, if she cheated on you then you may as well dump her, if not then think it through.
@@Genos0589 After doing so much self improvement as Coach Craig instructed, this morning my credit score spiked. Now I am able to attain the investments I always wanted. Improving my financial status. And my net worth drastically. Now I have better things to think of than her. She can take a number and stand in line. Or not.
@@jinxlee8556 good for you man, just focus on yourself, don't mind those women. they will crawling back to you once you have your financial freedom and abundance.
I saw this video at the perfect time 💗 Walking away from someone who is so little effort and continues to disrespect me by not truly listening to me and my needs . So one sided, I have to ask myself what in the hell do I even like about him enough to keep allowing this behavior? Thank you Craig & Margaret, much love to you both 💜💜💜
I walked away 3 days ago... im hurting so bad, I saw him as my divine partner, but he was not sure about the future. No arguments, just wished him well and explained that I was attaching to an outcome and giving too much of myself. We both cried. He needs to decide what he wants for himself and its best he does that alone! If its meant to be, it will be. If not, then I did the right thing. 🙏 we said goodbye for now, but not forever. We both had upbringing where we more or less fended for ourselves and not nurtured, but criticised.
Heyy Rose Bud...How Things are going Right Now????
@@libragirl5533 yeah ok… still just friends and check in with each other every few weeks to see both doing ok. No relationship though! That’s not going to happen. 🌸
Thank you so much. Although I'm the person my ex ran away from, this still gave me light on the mistakes I did like neglecting her needs and treating her badly. I stopped chasing her as I realized that was selfish. I let her go but made sure to say sorry for all the mistakes I've done.
That was me trying to hold on to someone that had gone a long time ago and was feeding me bread crumbs but I'm glad I made a decision to walk away and it feels so good
He who gets wisdom loves his own soul. He who keeps understanding shall find good. Proverbs 19:18
*A M E N* There is nothing new under the Sun #EternalWisdom
This hit me pretty hard. I was the person being walked away from in my situation. Nothing hurt more than realising my own mistakes too late to fix them. She tried telling me and telling me and I never listened. It’s been many, many months now and she has completely cut herself loose from my life. Not heard from her even once. It’s like she no longer exists. Or I no longer exist to her. I’ve accepted the fact that she’s not coming back, but the pain, the guilt, the hurt she’s left me with has been unbearable. I’ve reached out maybe 4/5 times just to talk, not even fight for her back. I just want to talk and discuss things, part ways amicably. Allow me to explain myself and tell her I understand. But every message is left with no reply, not even opened. Honestly, I don’t even feel like I deserve this any more. I’ve learned my lesson but it’s so cruel to cut someone off this abruptly and for this length of time. It’s like, I get it, it’s over, you’re gone.. but can we at least talk it out so I don’t wake up feeling like an absolute piece of shit any more?
For some reason I can’t edit my comment, but would like to add that she cut me off via text as well.
Same her as well
Thanks Coaches, you helped me get my ex back BUT he is not mentally well and cannot handle a healthy relationship. So, you have helped me realize that it's ok to let go as well. I love you guys💙💙
Walk away it's the best decision when they don't care about your needs and sometimes we hope this person will change and take you back but they don't. I just hope one day they will realized what they done was no nice to hurt the one who really love you.
This channel has helped me so much in the past. My first couple months of my break up were me desperately trying to get back with my ex. With time I slowly learned that I was tired, feeling unappreciated and knew I deserved better. #1 rule is to value yourself! My ex can suck it!
Idk if you get much monetary compensation from this channel, but know that you are really helping people so give yourself a pat on the back and a hug from me.
I'm in the middle of a breakup and my wife controls the money in the house so I don't really have the funds for therapy plus our children get any extra money I have. Your channel has really helped me and when I'm laying there at night for hours on end feeling miserable, your advice has been very helpful.
I agree with many of the comments. But we have to remember at any given time our partners can pull the plug on the relationship. So can we. But we can LIVE without them. Don't give them your power. Even if you have to stay busy 16 hours a day and sleep the other 8. Love yourself I was in a break up last year but I refused to miss work over it. I went to therapy and I am a therapist. We need help too. Again we have to mourn the break up but remember your worth. I had a beautiful relationship however he walked away devastating me. Try to love yourself. I traveled, went to therapy, exercised, prayed and journal. One year later I'm doing really great. I have not dated yet but I know other great man truly exists. Know your worth and it will take time but you will feel better.
Margaret is so right about self love...it takes work especially when you didnt hear positive affirmations from your parents when you were a child..when you have a lot of trauma attached to you...it takes a lot of work to get to the point where you love yourself.
But it cannot always be “ whenever THEY are ready “ or they will take advantage of that . My time and life is important too !
I hope to God I’m able to get over the woman I’ve been feeling depressed about and find myself someone who truly loves me and sees the potential in me
You will my friend, you
You can love someone and still choose to say goodbye to them. You can miss a person every day, and still be glad they're no longer in your life.
～ Oprah Winfrey
Thank you so much coach Margaret and coach Graig for sharing the wisdom and making these videos. This video and “10 questions to ask yourself (self love)” and “10 things man will do if he loved you” are a great boosters to shift my mind on healing journey and also make Oprah‘s advice much easier to achieve💕
I told her I wasn’t interested in being just friends and to let me know if she changes her mind and we can talk. She said that’s all she had to offer and said “bye”. I guess I’m walking away!
Update?
How did it go?
I walked away from a man 8 days ago who wasn't meeting my needs but I miss him so much
Same situation :(
U did the right thing. There are many good men out 4 you. Trust me
Hope you're ok Kim.
Same she didnt want children after stating at the start she did wave been together for 3 years
Before you walked away, did you explain to him what you needed?
You both are so right, there's nothing like the power you get by walking away and taking the power away from them.
I was listening to a video literally a few days ago and it was so interesting and so good we all are hurting but I think the people that are actually commenting and watching these videos are the true gems and I will tell you why we are the type of people that we would have never left our Partners we would have sat down came up with some type of solution but these other individuals did they actually hold our hand and talk to us and let us know the problem in a calm way loving respectful or did they yell at us and blame us for everything and what did they do at the end of the day they just left us and now we're sitting here with our hearts broken the only thing you can do is get your dignity and your respect back and your power back by walking away and never looking back if these people really want you they will find you no matter what you do they will find you if you want to get someone's attention you must remove yours
Richard Gonzalez I could die reading this. I literally had to catch my breath. RIP punctuations.
Thank you! - well spoken Richard !!
Gash this videos is literally giving me the validation that i did the right thing no matter how much its hurting me every day. And i know my ex would never see their mistakes and realize why i walked away. He would alwaya think that its all my fault.
You have to love yourself first.... that one went straight to my battered and bruised heart. Thanks Margaret and Craig. Working from home and watching your videos non-stop.
I've watched a few of his videos now. This dude, really, really knows what he is talking about.
The best of what i have listened to.. After 8 month of breaking up with me, she came back. We fixed things but she still had the chance to control me, i had enough of it and decided to walk away.. I hope it works.
I spend so much time watching your videos, and I love the work you both do. Unfortunately I can't afford any form of coaching from you at the moment and I've made so many mistakes with my ex that you wouldn't believe. But your videos help keep my spirits up and really help me understand myself better and understand the breakup better. I'm in a hopeless position with my ex to be completely honest, I feel that she truly resents and hates me, but your videos help me believe there's light at the end of the tunnel, even though I don't think I'll ever get my ex back. For that, I sincerely thank you. If I ever get a sudden surge of funds I will definitely be scheduling a session with you and purchase your workbooks. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. ❤️
Same as myself ....soon in new year I'm going to get some coaching
I so needed this video! My narcissistic ex just texted me and tried hovering me for the third time in two months, and I needed some guidance so that I didn’t make another stupid decision! Lol! My relationship gurus come through again! 🙌🏻👏🏻💪🏻
Stay strong. Don't ever go back to a narc.
Know your worth and value yourself
Brittany Rae same here
Brittany Rae I'm exactly in the same situation. Except she has contacted me 3 times in a month. Last one destabilized me, i must admit. The typical "I love you and miss you". But i did not reply. We need to stay strong. Wish you, and all you guys in the comments, the best.
RollingPanda I won’t ever again! ❤️
My ex was so insecure that control was the only thing they knew. I had no choice then to walk away because I was drained of my well-being. My needs were never met. It was all about them and their lies. It was exhausting. Every single point Craig and Barbers touched on here was present. I loved myself too much to stay any longer. It’s so important to love yourself. You’re no good for anyone if you’re not good to yourself first! I clearly attracted a bad person because I didn’t love myself enough in the beginning. It was a hard lesson, but an essential one. I’m grateful for the experience because now I know my value and will never give my power away to anyone who isn’t healthy enough in themself to value me back.
Thank you for the advice! I walked away for almost all of the exact reasons you stated. This person was emotionally damaged and I could not fix him. I decided that I loved myself more.
Just watched this video again and realized this is one of the most important ones.
The only thing I lost from the most toxic 8 month relationship I've ever experienced was myself and self respect.
She was constantly talking to other men and then cheated on me..the cardinal sin. Once I found this out I've walked away for good.
As heart breaking as it is they did me a favour. Life is so short wasting time on dead wood
Hi! Walking away is hard but so worth it. I know my value and I am lucky to have cool friends who keep me busy with fun activities. Consequently, when I feel like I am being taken for granted by someone I dip into my pool of other friends and live my life.
I have to listen to this over and over again... Thank you.
Thanks for this video. Just found out on my 2nd week of No Contact that my Narc ex has already moved on, possibly before he discarded me. It hurts like hell bc of the love loyalty sacrifices I made for this man. Learning to let go and be okay with it. Every time it hits me, I cry and pray it out. I believe its gonna get better. Thanks for the great info...❤❤❤
Craig ... What you do changes lives.... Only God can pay you back. All I can say is thank you. Keep up the good work.
Craig i just wanna thank you for everything. I used your knowledge and advice to get my ex back and eventually i did. NC really does work guys! I was with my ex for nearly 2 years and had a split and went into NC for 3 months and she came back! But it turns out things were just not right anymore and their an ex for a reason! I got back with her many times using NC! But now ive decided to walk away and focus on myself. Yes i still miss her but not as much anymore after 3 weeks. Im losing weight, getting a new job and hopefully a new car very soon! Thank you so much Craig Kenneth, God bless!
I loved this video but I love all your videos. I’m going through a tough time at the moment after a break up 4 months ago (2 months no contact). Your videos are helping to make sense of it all.
I deeply care for him he's expressed so many things to me about him personally I realized we both need time to grow but it's a total gentleman he's showing value for me when he sees me in person and he's not much of a phone person but he was trying a little harder than he has lately but anyway God bless you all and I'm also on my knees praying about this one
we were serious for 1.5 years. Same here the quarantine breakup is real. Went 5 weeks with NC... she contacted me and we met up. We talked for about 2 hours. Toward the I felt the vibes starting to be off. She wants to be “friends” I told her my feelings for you is more then friends and I wanted us in a romantic relationship.. she then said I didn’t grow which was total bs she’s only saying that cause she wants to friend zone be and I said I can’t because I like you more then that.. at the end of the day everyone is human and I have feelings also.. time to walk away tbh I really did care but I’m young and healthy. It sucks cause I work with her but she’s leaving for a new college end of 2021 so after that she won’t ever have to see me again.! Life moves on. God bless
god always has a plan for every one
Trust believe have faith in God 🙏
you are helping loads of people
Out
💯🙏☺️😊👏🙌
Thank u so much
May god always give u more health amen 🙏
Thank you so much for this. I am in tears but it helps and enlightened me.😭
OMG this is my current relationship, listening to this has pointed out so many more bad points I hadn't even realized I am being put through.
Thank you for opening my eyes. 😭😭
A lot of people here are saying “I walked away after so and so left me” that’s not walking away. They’re talking about being the dumper. They’re talking about when you love someone and it’s just not working so you leave.
If someone is abusive or just not giving you what you want it’s all you can do.
The only thing here is, that person may have ditched you for very good reasons and may wish that you’ve changed but ultimately not want to reach out. So for all of you doing no contact I hope you do reach out eventually if you feel you did something wrong and have changed / learned from it, (maybe from work books or this channel or whatever) if you’re still interested. I had to say goodbye to someone recently. I wanted them to change but I also knew I couldn’t wait for that.(I hope they will change, better themselves and come find me) but personally I will not be ever contacting them again. I am the dumper and I am doing permanent NC.
Maybe this is easier because my relationship was non committal and only 4 months. But we met a lot and spent a lot of time together so I would like to think it counts for some psychological attachment + walking away is very loud.
I feel most people posting here had very long and serious relationships and this advice is for such people. Maybe I don’t really have a chance but I’ve already started going to the gym and accepting other dates anyway.
I'm in the same situation the guy decided to walk away because he said I was being to hot and cold I will admit I was a bit off with him because I was confused on how he felt about me when I should of just went with the flow, I would love another chance with him. Really disappointing because we really liked each other I even met all his family!! Is he just doing this to see how much I care? I'm not even interested in dating anyone else but I don't want to blow my chances and look desperate reaching out to him. Any advice?
If you listen to the video it covers both. It also covers the dumpee walking away after the dumper hurt them. Showing self respect and knowing that this other person (dumper) won’t try to talk like adults so you must walk away.
@@ryze2499 Yep I'm on that boat, I tried talking to him after he dumped me gave him a chance just incase he regretted his decision because I did like him and he did say he would Prob regret dumping me but he wasn't making the effort back and didn't show much interest so time to have some self respect, He won't hear from me again. Disappointed at how the relationship went but life goes on.
I don’t know why he does not have many subscribers but he is the best I found. I wish I have a few accounts that I can subscribe him. Many times
Yup I'm not going to contact him even if he never contacts me again.
Nobody taught us this knowledge, it is not have been charted, i dont know why. Until today we found coaches like you, we have hope to restablish our sanity. Thanks.
I walked away after he said it’s over and not to message me. I kept my dignity and never message back. It’s almost 6 weeks almost I see him in gym but I totally don’t care
With all due respect, I, too, disagree with, "Whenever you're ready..."
From my perspective, those words are not self-love. They are self-hate. Where is the healthy boundary? Standard?
Giving them all the control and putting ourselves on ice for an indefinite amount of time at their convenience so they can cheat in peace while we sit and worry or get busier living our fullest life when they should be working on themselves and, hopefully, therefore, the relationship was bad advice.
The rest of the video was exceptional. The aforementioned blanket statement gives all our power away.
Time to negotiate and/or lay the terms and conditions down in a loving way for both parties not just setting up a dangerous, one-sided precedent.
Thank you.
Stay safe.
God bless.
This is my second day dealing with my break up, it is too sudden that I am not prepared ,I do not exactly know what to do. I cry every time I remember the good old days. You cannot imagine everything I have done for him. I took care of him from head to foot, in sickness and in health, I was there for him. I DID AND GAVE EVERYTHING to him... We planned the future together- our kids, home and the life we will have in the future... I am questioning my worth now...He said I was a very good woman, I am...His reasons to break up is that I have a gluey love, that I love too greatly (yes I did, I made him feel loved from head to foot)...That he wants a partnership without great feelings. I asked him why did he just broke up earlier of our relationship and not to pretend that he loved me for all this time??? I believed him with all my heart and soul, I felt like used, I felt like an object that after being exhausted will be thrown. I keep asking God, why it has to happen to me? I am totally down and lost, I dont know how to pick myself up from this brokenness. I begged him to give us a chance but he was determined to walk away. I am in no contact phase, it helps but I have the strong urge to message him every time and ask why again. I am so down... I did love myself before I met him, but I was blinded by my love for him that I did forget that.
I completely understand also talked about marriage, moving in together and even thought of names for our future kids. We were together for 3 years. He broke up with me a month ago saying he wasn't ready for any of that and I literally cried everyday up until today. I still love him but honestly it seems like he's moved on already and no longer loves me and it's strange because he was the one who broke up with me but he's been so cruel to me and ignores me. We work together but I am planning to move to a different location soon. I am slowly starting to tell myself I need to move on. And like you I still have no idea what to do, I love him so much and I'm confused on what happened. It's definitely not easy but everyday I try to think of something happy even if it's me waking up in the morning or seeing a beautiful flower. I hope the both of us are able to become happy again soon.
@@peachblossom.phlox3403 Praying for our hearts to heal soon. We just gave our hearts to the wrong people. As someone said to me, we are capable to be loved and and stood by, no matter what the circumstances are. It would be really good for you to be in a new environment, stay strong and always remember that I keep praying for you. Everything will be ok. Sending my hugs to you.
I think that when you respond to breadcrumbs it helps them wean themselves off you. Its so cruel because it gives you hope that they're "reaching out".
Their anxiety got the better of them. Once you understand that, you can use it against them. Don’t reply ..at all. Until they write they miss you and want to see you, keep the NC.
You and Margaret are the best! I have learned so much from the videos. Learning to respect and stand up for myself. I left a year and 5 months ago and going through divorce now. One nice thing I will say about myself is I am a loyal person who gives my all in a relationship.
Im so happy watching these ive had my first very bad breakup and watching your videos seem to help me through ❤
Same here.
He walked away from. Me out of manipulation, I had no choice but went on NC
He reached out to me 6 weeks later, I took him. Back but nothing has changed much.
This time I walked away from. Him in silence and blocked him.
I felt I was being taken for granted, took me as convenience and breadcrumbed me.
I choose ME this time!
Wow I wish I saw this video 2 weeks ago. I asked my ex to meet me today cause I didn’t get to say What I feel when he dumped me. After watching 10 videos of you talking about relationships. Now I feel like I’ll just cancel it and stop contacting him. I feel like I’ll just walk away.
So what’s the update?
Im all alone , but i believe im mentally strong that’s why i can love myself , its been 3 months she dumped me for our 7years relationship , getting stronger everyday, I won’t let myself suffer for so long . There’s no time to wast , been training so hard and won my kickboxing title fight 2 weeks ago . Today i feel great because she is not the first person on my mind anymore when i wake up . Believe in yourself, love and respect yourself . U deserve better
Good for you bro. Keep on shining.
Hang in there Champ!
Gf of 8 years left me 2 weeks ago. Needed this
paulsen 1017 its not going to be easy, but i believe u can do it . We all deserve better
Thank you for all you do, Coach Craig and Coach Margaret! 😍
Hi Coach Craig and Margaret. I may say I am an anxious person. I was in a relationship with my ex gf (we are both Lesbians) where I became so toxic because I was too focused on my frustrations in life to the point that I neglected her needs and emotions, without considering that she is also going through something difficult. But honestly, I gave too much effort in our relationship and I do really love her, I care for her especially when she's sick, I cooked for, I help her out on doing things at home, I surprised her on special occasions, we even love going out on dates going road trips, etc. She broke up with me because I wasn't improving myself in terms of my anxiety. And I guess that was a wake up call. Now I am so desperate to work on myself but I loose a job and broke so I couldn't get a therapy, but I go to counseling that is being offered by our government for free, however it's only for 2 sessions. I started praying everyday consistently and surrendering to God everything I am going through. I started to write down all the bad attitudes and behaviours and tried controlling my emotions because I really want to change for her. I want to get her back. But I am too scared because she's a person who doesn't dwell on past relationships. When we broke up, she told me she still loves me but 2 weeks after I contacted her and she told me she's happy without me and doesn't love me anymore. I am really doing my best now to work on myself even without getting a therapy.
Hope you are in better place now 👍🏼
This is probably the most helpful for me of all your videos. One question: when you walk away, the void and sense of loss that you're left with is excruciating. Can you give some advice on how the anxiously attached person can manage the emptiness and panic that follows?
Terri S exactly. I’m really struggling with eating and sleeping and working.
It's only been 2 weeks for me, so who am I to say. But I've been here before and in a bad way. I promised myself never to go there again.
He ended it out of the blue. It's hard because a break-up with a bf or gf is viewed differently from a divorce or a death and people are sympathetic for just so long. For us it's devastating. So these are the things that are helping me now and things I hadn't done before to help me keep moving forward:
*Feel sad, cry allow it to be okay
*Recognize that you will idealize them, and miss all the wonderful times
*BUT...then remind yourself of all the times you cried, the times they didn't give you what you need, when you were together but still felt alone
*Write a list of ALL the times they let you down and focus on those
*Stop giving them so much credit for the little you got instead of all you didn't get
*Read your list every time you pine for them
*Write all your great qualities down, and remember we are worth so much more and deserve someone who appreciates that in us
*Don't contact them, drive by where they live or visit...it only prolongs the healing
*Surround yourselves with people with love you
*Stay busy
*Replace that Mobius strip, the one that plays over and over in your head about how you miss them how you wish it were different like I have so much to offer they're the ones missing out
*Put everything that reminds you of them away. I can't throw mine out yet
And be okay when you feel like shit but don't stay there for long.
We need to remain hopeful, know we are amazing and resilient...we will be okay in time. There has to be someone better for us. Right? Blessing my fellow broken hearted.
Oh...take advantage of the bonus weight loss (if ur like me a few lbs over weight). The next guy is gonna be lucky!
Jesus is the only one who can fill that void.. trust me. 💕
Hi coach. It's been awhile. Big fan I want to publicly thank you for helping me. I learned one thing. I will not die if there is a break up. Its true lol. Respect yourself.
Your videos have helped me by being calming and reassuring and I don’t have to involve friends or family too much. I’m just trying to come to better understanding. And dealing with my pain and anxiety from the turn out of what happened . Thank you.
When u try so hard to invest time and it's all about what he wants and its one sided it hurts.. He walks in and out. Yet u cling on so hard.. Decided today to remove his number and keep on walking. I won't lie ill look back and feel sad but deep down he isn't the one 🙁
This has helped me walk away from a toxic situation
I had a different experience. I found my ex would pull away and then get angry that I gave them space. They said they wanted me to pull them close when they pulled away. But I also found that if I did try, it never worked. Could never win 🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️
Narcissist
Same for me! No matter what could never win. Gave space , they complained they didn’t see me enough .. was always available they complained they needed time to themselves
To anyone who is here watching this because of a break up. I fell in love and started to date this girl for 5 months, we broke up. I did no contact for about a month and she came back. Everything was good again I was in love until I found out she was talking to someone else or at least trying to cover it up. I walked away, blacked her on everything. The pain is there but I know I’m a good man, and she will never find anyone like me ever. I’m on my own path, and focusing on myself now. In the process I will find someone who knows my worth. ❤️ so to anyone who is hurt, hang in there. Time heals all wounds
Nice but have any other issues including relationship problem I have a very legit person that can help you in just 24 hours ok
Yesterday I walked away after he reached out after three months and said he wanted to remain friends. He has a gf (which is why our close friendship/relationship ended) and I knew I couldn’t do it. So I said no. I couldn’t keep in contact with him. It was hard and I felt bad I said it. Surprisingly he said he’d reach out to me later once I’m ready and try again.
I’m in tears. I had to send a break up message to my bf, i know he’s working hard to keep his job in these times but that gives no excuse to ignore me. The reason i sent a messade is because he never answer a call from me, he reads messages but never answer. An answer could take hours or even none at all. I see him online on Facebook answering other peoples comments but i get jack shit. ”I’m always working” I always have to wait for two weeks or more to hear from him or even see him. He helps other people with things all the time, neighbours and his workcheifs kids with car rides etc, he also spends time with his ex wife cause she is under a cancer treatment. He asks for help from everybody else but me. I’m just so fed up with how he talks so sweetly with other people and being so cold and distant towards me. I love him so much but i can’t deal with all this neglect, it has been going on for months. Duck that guy!
Freaking Fantastic I really started to think that too. I met him on a walk two weeks ago, he was really sad about the situation but i acted like it didn’t matter. He also said that we are still ”friends” but his body language is saying different. I don’t want anything to do with him.
Not necessarily a narc. That requires a clinical diagnosis and is an extremely dangerous and serious mental illness.
Sounds more like he's just not that into you and too coward to confront you so he hopes you'll respect yourself enough to get the message in the silence.
He's close to ghosting which would be kinder than breadcrumbing.
Give yourself closure as he does not seem able to.
After you work on the lesson learned, you'll meet a better match. If no work is done, the pattern will simply repeat itself over and over so, please, consider taking better care of yourself and your choices will reflect that.
All the best.
Some dont care that you've walked away. It hurts but I've kept walking for 3 months.
True
Yeah. Mine didn't it's been 5 months now.
@@CeeP211 I'm sorry for us both but there's a better one for us. Keep believing ❤
@@IsaacKnowReally no, Im in Jersey
Mark Aguilera exactly
This is true with walking away when your needs aren’t met I felt like I wanted to go told my partner I felt like it then she ended up separating from me two months later I tolerated stuff because I lost my self esteem I Was scared to leaves and I should have
Thank you for this. I'm going to watch some other videos. My bf of 18 months just broke up with me...out of the blue. He's a nice man, kind heart, good dad and friend. The time we spent together was easy but he's always struggled opening up. He's had few examples of what a good relationship could be and/or the tools to work towards achieving a happy partnership. Instead he focused on work, saying he didn't know how to make time for us. I recognize his short comings but still I'm left feeling...why can't he see what a great catch he had in me. Maybe I'll find some comfort in other videos.
Yep. I chased and my ex has blocked me completely even by his cell carrier. He is my one true love and I know that I’ve lost him forever. I’ve never felt so much pain. 😥
Stacie Lynn you need to go no contact like yesterday...also check out coach Lee videos...all is not lost
Stacie Lynn be happy Stacie don’t look back I was in the same situation this is when you have to love yourself. Time will heal all wounds. You need to love yourself first. Be happy with your own mind and thoughts. You will make it through this. I was like you at one point. Trust me it does get better! I’m here for you stay strong! You got this!
I hope you are okay now, how do you feel now?
Stacie Lynn, did you find a new hot guy yet? I'm currently got my sights on this handsome guy at work. I don't care about my ex anymore. They are dead to me.
That last line of the video was very powerful, thank you so much!
Good to cite all cases where you should walk away. We can get so fogged up in relationships...we don't always see the reality
I did this about 3 weeks ago. He thought I was bluffing, but when he realized over a week with no words from me... He started chasing.
He told me, the entire time we broke up he was expecting my call. "she will call" is what he kept saying to himself.
When I didn't he got scared.
This method helps in 2 ways
1. If he really loves you he will chase. Only if you are in the right. Don't be acting crazy & expect this from a man. They won't chase.
2. They will never chase, which means they already made this decision long before you broken up.
That is ok.
Because you have a life to live & someone else to love.
So his lost is not the end of you & vice versa.
Be happy that you found out early rather than later.
Tough when they have trauma and are more fearful avoidant. She felt she had to leave and at one time said we really comfort each other but trigger each other. Even when i tried to talk and understand she wouldn't so leaves me in the dark. So she left without even trying. I'm also learning the triggers are more about ourselves so it's unfair to put that on others especially without communicating with them.
I love her and hope she wants to reconcile. We had some life events that caused extra stress and would be unfortunate for us to leave each other's lives when we really enjoyed one another. Working on my issues to be better for myself and hopefully one day be her mountain.
I never really used to pay attention to my attachment issues until I read “Attached” but since then I’ve watched so much stuff on attachment. The thing about self love Margaret talked about I never really thought about it to much, but my parents sure to criticize me a lot growing up it always felt like more criticism then positivity. It’s not that they didn’t love me but that’s how they were raised but we don’t realize how damaging it is to your self esteem and view of your own value
That is true. Narc takes all the time and energy that we suppose to spend on our loved ones. I won't take back the kind of rubbish that I already put aside.
Craig nice video. I walked away and have bolt up $5,000.00. Now, we are about to go to court. I’ve already put CPS on my ex-narc. About to do an emergency take away of my kids from my ex-narc for child’s school attendance.
When all hope and trust has gone. U have to quit fighting. And realize that loving them, is killing u. U have to save urself, before u destroy urself mentally.
I have moved on, but I’m protecting my heart now. As times goes on, maybe my new relationship with Lisa will grow. But for now, I’m guarded.
Thanks for this video Craig. Because everything CAN NOT be saved and ppl have to know. When to let go.
I am a Mighty Spartan Warrior of Freaking Awesomeness!!!
My Majestic Beastness knows no bounds!
My humility is as deep as the farthest depths of space and as bright as the scorching sun!
My compassion is the unseen aspects of the iceberg and as broad as the horizon eye that can see!
I am a man.
Mechanically strong and systematically beautiful!
My intellect is sharper than cheddar cheese an my wittiness is as light as a feather but does sting like a bee. Being that of pure comedy!
I am awesome!
I am great!
Thy name shall not be taken in vain!
I am truth and submerged in life with my experiences as deep as the sea!
Self worth is maturity and thy deserve mature people in my life who value me and appreciate me just as I will adore them every minute of the day.
Be peace, find love and live stress free!
Go forth and conquer with diligence and pride for the day is yours to seize!!!
💪😎👍
Thank you coaches. Got a confirmation to what i am suppose to do.. walking away for him to realize how he value of being me😢
I don't think you should say whenever your ready because they think your just waiting for them. It's like a safety net it doesn't create loss at all. They have to think they may never see or hear from you again. That you are willing to walk away forever.
Craig this channel is a godsend!! Ive learned so much from you and the help is unending. Thank for the great and very real videos,Gid bless you and all your work! 💯
Margaret’s explanation of loving yourself! 🥰💎💖
Nice but have any other issues including relationship problem I have a very legit person that can help you in just 24 hours ok
Contact father right* away
Text him now through whatszpp
I hope she misses me, we’ve been together for 5 years. And married with a baby, she left me 4 months after our daughter was born. I miss her terribly, it’s been 4.5 months
Just under 9 years together she proposed to me after 2 years we have a little boy whos 7 been 2 month since we split have minimal contact due to our son..i made mistakes changing a day at a time.. broke nc today after i dropped her stuff off at her mums an told her mum i still love her an want her back but who knws what will happen..did all the break up wrong beg pleaded for about 6 weeks but kept breakin nc cos im a fool kept tellin her i loved her.... back to nc again..
Hope it comes good for u
Hey Craig,
Merry christmas to you and your family.
i just want to tell you that your videos and Skype had helped me alot. i'm now a new man working on my self development with all the outer stress that is happening in my country. Yes, i'm happy and looking forward to improve myself more and never never enter a relation and have the same issues that i faced before.
thank you,
Mazen
This is truly
What it comes down to if you love and have self respect
Listening to you is always of help guys.. Dear Kenn & Margaret....thank you 🤍🤍🤍
I’ve always chased and never felt worthy
I will skype you Craig as I have wanted to for a year
My wife had walked away from me, kids 26 and 22 , two dogs and stopped paying three mortgages being on jointed names. She had accumulated almost 100k in her personal debt couple of years ago without my knowledge, signed her assets in property's to debt collectors without my knowledge, raped my credit card for years so much so that my life never felt more miserable and depressing. I have also find out about all that just by accident while looking for some other paperworks. My attitude towards her had changed after learnings about what she's done Just 3 months ago she left us blaming me for false behaviour, calling names, being controlling, asking for sex in order for her to see her friends. My life fantasy of having my family together till the day I die is now gone with hers " power of moving away" leaving us in this horrible situation . I work 7 days week as a slave and for some crazy reason still love her even though she ignores me and threatened with the court if I continue to send love messages.
Couch Craig, is this something you can help me with just clear my own thoughts since my life really does not make any sense any more?
This video was a Great help for me. Thanks a ton Margret (you are like a mother to me) and Craig for being my saviour in this hard time. Without you two I would have been in deep depression but your videos are saving me in this No Contact period. I have been married since 15years and have two kids. My relationship was also one sided and my partner Is v self obsessed who took me for granted always. But I walked away from that home for a while for my protection. Thanks a lot for motivating me through your videos 🌹lots of love ❤️and hugs 🤗 to you both 👏👏