I also would like to add in the hug (instead of the handshake that they made seem like is the norm between them) and the extra giddy wave he gave his son when he said good luck.
Literally the courage to go back to the darkest times in your life and create something good out of it isnt something most people can do. This man is absolutely amazing
When I first started this series, I thought the actor was playing the role TOO well. His trauma, his mannerisms. It made so much sense that it was played by the real victim. So well done.
@@Ririfentynews dont know if this a joke, but the catholic church has a reputation for a lot of priest being caught diddling kids by abusing their position of power and the church tries to protect the priest by paying hush money to the victims families. And it make sense because religious people are easier to control and priest are trusted by a lot of church goers and kids are more likely to listen and do whatever the priest tells them to do and then you have the backing of your church and other weirdo priest, its a very easy position to get and easy to take advantage of for kiddy lovers and in general for people who are abusers or people who like to have power.
@@Ririfentynews it’s so hard to fully explain because unfortunately it’s prevalent not only in the Catholic churches but other religious “churches” as well, but it’s a well known fact that many Catholic Churches have been grounds for lots of sexual abuse of minors, notably with young males. There’s been hundreds of cases that have been reported and thousands that have not been formally reported due to religious trauma and backlash towards victims.
@@HildaJ8I’d say, in context of the story, maybe not so much, because she later insists, and even says something along the lines of “it wasn’t a woman, It was a man right?”
@@chicken0w044notably only after she already asked „it was a woman right? a heartbreak?“ and he doesn’t react to her satisfaction. she asks the same question but with a man a couple of episodes later, it‘s literally just manipulation
@@HildaJ8came here to write the same thing. I think this is something that people who has met someone like that or been through similar things can easily see but not the others. People like her, they know very well what to say and to who. Every step they take is to manipulate you and we, regular people don’t really notice it , sometimes it can take years. About her saying ”it wasn’t a woman right? It was a man” is not so hard to guess, abusers are usually men. Also, usually it is not so hard to understand who is abused who is not…
Baby Reindeer is an undeniably bingeworthy masterpiece! But what truly sets it apart is that we get to see the psychological complexity of being groomed, abused, stalked through the eyes of a man - a perspective sadly often overlooked. It shines a light in that dirty corner that no one wants to look at. I'm sure a lot of people who lived in the shadows of their own shame will finally feel seen 🖤
For real.. I assume you watched the whole thing and I'm not spoiling anything but in the final episode when his dad looks at him and says, "What about me? Would you treat me any differently?".... The confused look on Donnie's face as his dad says "I grew up in the Catholic Church"... and then his realization that he and his father had both been raped was a gut punch. So much shame washed away as they healed together. 😢 Beautiful
@@sleazeberg Totally 🖤 I loved that it wasn't just between father and son - the mother knew well what her husband had to carry all these years and now her son too...although it was heavy, the scene lifted a weight off everyone's shoulders. No one had to carry it alone anymore
Men get abused too women don't seem to understand that..where I work is always about the wrongs of women no voice for men no opinion allowed just agree..the worst abuse I ever had was from women and I'm a man...this film is very important.
This story was traumatic and it made me super uncomfortable. Thank you for sharing bits of your story. From being groomed, sexually assaulted, stalked, abused in every way. It needed to be shared. Let your success be a MASSIVE middle finger to the villians who tried to break you.
He also wanted to bring empathy, understanding toward Martha situation. Not a middle finger but a way to open a conversation on mental illnesses, the complexity of the mind and traumas.
@@Soleil-vk9ts Yes, I noticed that. I work in Healthcare, therefore I have empathy for those who are clearly unwell. No doubt he was living a nightmare, however I admire how careful they were in her portrayal.
@@Soleil-vk9ts Stop feeling sorry for this woman 🙄 she’s not only stalker but a racist too judging by her social media posts! I have no Sympathy, she has ruined lives.
He was abused but could have handels the situation better, like not taking drugs, keeping contact with martha etc .. not to be rude but u sleep in the bed u make. he did this on himself.
@@mattisketels8939 Nobody said his decision making was right. However, if you've ever been in a difficult mental state, you are vulnerable to anything. Can we congratulate him on getting to other side after his failures? There are so many souls who go into a spiral and end up early in the grave.
What blows my mind is that Richard is my age. He’s only about to be 35. You can tell he’s lived a long life already. His story is wild. And I think his retelling of it is a form of therapy for him. He’s wise beyond his years, out of necessity. I’m glad he’s come out the other side of all these experiences.
He's also a psycho who enjoyed getting stalked to some extent and got off on the "shame" he felt when dating a trans woman when there's nothing wrong with dating trans people if that's what you're in to and subjected her to that emotional roller-coaster. I'm not saying he deserved to get stalked but he low key got a thrill out of it by his own admission and even slept with his stalker.
@@itsneveramannequin8737 That's what drugs can do to people. My great uncle was an addict for most of his life and I've seen pictures of him in his early 30s where he looked about 60.
Richard Gadd just created an entire new genre: the autobiographical true crime psycho-thriller dramedy. The best piece of writing and acting of the year. He just gave a new entire meaning to the words "brutally honest"!
Except he now is reluctant to call it " true" but now "emotionally true". Aspects were exaggerated for dramatic impact ,and no one was convinced of stalking.
Well said. His story and your comment give me a sense of motivation to write and film my abuse story. One of which evolved around my sibling I no longer speak to. Seven years since I have seen in seven years. Mom was diagnosed with dementia. Thirty days (to be precise) after her diagnosis, my sibling coerced our mom to sign a bank loan for the amount of 300k. A home equity loan. My sibling snatched every penny out of our mom’s life savings and used a portion of it to hire a lawyer. She painted me as the devil’s twin. In reality, I was taking care of our mom’s needs. Twenty hours per day for 2.5 years. Bathing her, changing her depends, feeding her, etc etc. My sister would praise me in private for doing a wonderful job in caring for our mom, and then the next minute, call the police to report me for elder abuse. I wasn’t arrested but I was treated like a criminal. My sibling used to work for APS/CPS and knows judges. APS is Adult Protective Services. At home, her and her son financially and verbally abused our mom. Court battles at probate court was an uphill battle. I won those court appearances but at a huge price. Sibling’s lawyer was playing dirty and I had only God to get me through my worst nightmare.
that liner of “being an open wound they can sniff at” was one of those statements that wakes you up and lives with you. It perfectly sums up the cycle of abuse and dark parts of human psyche. Ugh, just a work of art all the way around. I hope this is healing on a new level for you.
For me as well that line had a biggest effect on me (although there were plenty of “big lines” in the story telling), woke up still thinking about it. So simply put words together and still have the deepest and truest meaning that never has been so accurately said before. He really went through the trauma otherwise couldn’t come up with gems like that.
that line made me cry because reminded me of many things that i lived in the past. I been abused and falsely accused of abuse by my ex gf. The people that supposed to help me also tried to take advantage of me and broke into my house and stole my savings.
The story, the camera, the scenery, the film set, the cast... everything is phenomenal. Plus: Not a single bad actor. No unnecessary dialogue, no pointless scene. I can't remember ever seeing anything better.
It's a surprise to me that it's the director that played the main character. He wasn't acting but exposing his raw emotions to his audience. I teared up and cry cause i know victoms of rape and i know the kind of emptions loved ones deal with. We need more unfiltered things like these
and no forced inclusion bc he really was attracted to man at some point and also woman. The trans woman was a mixture of two. And she was a necessity character on the plot. All the actors were amazing. 😍😭
@@FlowerGirl-lp4kbNo, it’s more that he discovered that Martha, despite her behaviour, still had tangible relatable emotions driving her madness, and that the patterns Donny observed to have destroyed his life were present in hers as well.
@@FlowerGirl-lp4kb He understood that her behavior, just as his own behavior, came from trauma. It just manifests itself differently for different people.
Truly, I had a stalker once and I remember breaking down in tears to my best friend because I was accidentally nice to him in passing yrs later and started receiving threats again and she got so mad at me like wtf why would you have even acknowledged him!? And she was right. But that ONE smile started it all over again. And I def felt bad for him at first until he involved my family then I had to get a restraining order. It's the oddest situation really, I was once group friends with that person so it's like a million emotions in one and for some reason a lot of shame and guilt. I love this series and they captured each side almost perfectly I think. (Because every situation is a bit different obviously) It's not always a black&white situation. And it's caused me trauma for years so I applaud him hugely for creating this & sharing his story to help others.
My fiancé asked me “why did you watch it if you knew it could harm you?” I told him about my experience watching this, while also being a victim of sexual assault. He knew, since a long time ago. It was… triggering, to say the least. But I stayed. And I watched. And I cried and panicked and had to pause a couple of times. It wasnt the scenes of the actual abuse what triggered me. It was the aftermath, your description of shame, the pathetic sense of worthlessness… When you go through these things you kinda know who really went through this and who is writing it just for show… I knew you knew. And I felt seen. No one tells you how to go through this. No one tells you “omg girl same!” Its so hard to find a place to talk about this, without being seen as a victim, as the poor thing, as a broken person. Watching this was so so harmful but at last, I was seen. Thank you. I wish the best of recoveries for you, you are a brave soul. Edit: Thank you to everyone for all the kind words, I wrote this on a very VERY vulnerable state,, but I needed to express myself somehow. I wasnt expecting to reach so many beautiful souls. After writing this I seeked therapy once more, the wound was once again open but it made me realize how many things I havent talked about because of shame. Richard Gadd, you are making a difference. You may not read this but to anyone else who has: Help, compassion and understanding are always out there. Be kind to yourself and others, we've all been through so much.
Thanks for sharing your story iam going to watch it tonight iam Surivior of domestic violence and sa my son said might be too much for your mum but I said I want to watch it .because we come through and come out the other side stronger hope ur OK now darling ❤❤❤
@@insertname2035 I dont think you understood what I meant to say. Talking about this with friends, loved ones, family: you see their faces and how they see you either with distrust, disgust, sadness. Specially coming from the culture I come from. You are “dirty” afterwards. I cant really talk about this with no one I know because all these emotions it brings. At least watching baby reindeer I felt seen. Thats what I meant.
I knew it was based upon a true story but had no idea just how personal it truly was to you, the main actor...your own story. This is incredibly brave. To put yourself through this and do it in such an amazing way. Massively impressed
I just stayed up all night watching this, an incredible show that highlights the best of British television and filmmaking. Never seen anything like it before, amazing!!
Genuinely the best show I’ve seen in a while. The casting was absolutely perfect, and the realness of it all was so insanely prevalent and beautiful. 10/10
I didn't blink the entire series. The bravery to not only tell your truth but to reenact and relive it is extraordinary. I hope Richard and everyone involved knows that they are truly worthy of the peace, love and joy that they are longing for.
Such respect for Richard bringing such a traumatic and frightening time period of his lifetime to the screen, and as a play as well. Honestly horrific the things he went through, but to be able to re tell that and relive those experiences again is such a strong thing to do. Love the show, big respect to everyone who made it
It’s cathartic. And it’s obviously part of his repetition compulsion, but in a healthy way. In the show you see how he gets stuck it patterns of re-enacting the abuses. While doing it artistically it can help the world.
@@Dontatmebruvdoes that matter though? he never claimed every single piece of content shown is an exact recreation of his real life. It’s a true story, but it’s also art… which means he’s allowed to fiddle with it in ways he sees fit. It’s like the stand-up scenes, majority of the responses to his jokes are dead silence, in actual videos of his comedy shows there’s laughter here and there; that doesn’t make him a liar, that’s most likely how HE perceived it. a lot of us view embarrassing moments 10x worse than they actually happened. That’s what a lot of this show consists of, things he would’ve wished happened; things that actually happened & things he feared happening, it’s all intertwined left up to the viewer to dig into. That’s what art allows - interpretation. My final point being, his experiences are very much real and should not be invalidated by dramatized scenes & storytelling.
I just binged it, I’m still processing. It touched on so many important issues, wow. It’s so well done. I’m sad that this even happened to him, but I’m glad he’s willing to put it out there and to facilitate conversations.
Dear Richard, you have no idea how life changing this series is! I was challenged, cried, realised things from my own life, felt less alone in my own abuse, and grew more empathy for people in my life who are self-sabotaging. Seeing you look better now provides me peace. If you have the energy and emotional capacity, how would you feel about sharing about why you returned to your abusers home? I hope you're in a place in life where you feel deserving of happiness, fulfilment and love for self. Bless you
The way I perceived it Richard was deeply manipulated by the alleged success to fulfill his dreams of becoming famous and finally liked by other people that led him through that hell over and over again. The inner need to pursue his dream being worth the abuse in his manipulated mind, a necessary sacrifice to make even though it hurts. And if it hurts less with every time it happens and you've come too far to stop now, you just close your eyes and run into the same wall again and again.
That's a very thoughtful way of asking this question that I also want to know the answer of! I also want to know what drove him to catalog & continually listen to Martha's voice messages.... my husband found it very odd. Lol
The part where he has the realization of "This man is trying to control your mind, you need to leave" hit me the hardest. I've gone through a v similar situation and it's so bizarre how you can miss so many red flags just to snap into reality so hard.
As someone that was raped as a 14 year old child by a 19 year old after being drugged, this really resonated. I’m so glad this man was brave enough to show the inner shame and turmoil we all share as survivors. What an amazingly honest portrayal. I hope this wins awards and helps young people understand more about how assaults happens, so they can feel empowered to report it in a way our generation didn’t know how to. I know I was told “no means no”, so I thought it was my fault because I couldn’t say no. Passed out people can’t give consent!
Perhaps the most honest, raw, brave, hilarious, and tragic pieces of television I've ever seen. Mind blowingly good. Wishing the very best in life to Mr Gadd.
As a victim myself, it's kind of a weird and very personal situation and only those who've been through it, know the best way to heal. A lot of the times, victims are re-traumatized each and every time they share the details regarding the abuse that took place. Some victims go on to victimize others in a desperate attempt to reverse the shame they still deeply feel by playing the role of the aggressor. Then their are the very few who can openly talk about it or in even fewer cases, walk not only themsleves but the entire world through what happened and eventually that pain will start to evolve into catharsis when others suffering with the same trauma feel open enough to let you know how much they relate to your experience and can finally find the courage to confront their own pain in turn beginning a process of healing as well. I may not have worded everything right but I hope it makes enough sense to try and explain it a bit.
For such heavy material, I binged the entire series easily. Very triggering stuff but handled with such care and (dark) humour. Richard Gadd is on my radar now (in a non-stalkery way)
As a victim, watching this series provided so much clarity of my own actions and feelings, and allowed me to open up to my husband about the terrible things I think about. I don't think I've ever felt this connected to a story.
When I was 16 I was SA by my uncle, someone i looked up to as a father figure my entire childhood. 14 years later and I still can’t bring myself to tell anyone. I have forgiven my uncle but I will never forget. I can definitely relate to the shame you feel when something like that happens, wanting to ignore it and act like it never happened.
I'm so sorry to hear that. Please try and tell someone, you can't keep carrying this around and the people who love and care about you should help you as much as you need.
The trailer does NOT do this justice AT ALL. Each episode hits harder and harder. I wasn't ready for this. Anyone who's ever struggled with self hatred or is LGBT should watch this.
As a gay man, I find it pretty insulting that you think gay men and lesbians would be uniquely affected by a show about a confused bisexual with a thing for MTF transsexuals. Also, it is literally impossible to be “LGBT.” Homosexuality and bisexuality are mutually sexual orientations, and transgender identity isn’t even a sexual orientation at all.
This show feels more like an art piece rather than a show now that Richard explains it more in depth. One of my favorite shows I’ve ever watched, I hope he makes more.
He could easily make this story about being a victim, but the choice to investigate and ask himself his actions is so brave and made this an unique peace. 11/10.
I found ‘the making of’ as emotionally powerful as the series. Richard deserves accolades for this raw piece of writing! And both him and Jessica Oscar’s. Amazing. More as real and powerful as this please Netflix!
I watched it back to back, couldn't stop watching, I found it very very moving, the part where Donny breaks down during his set and describes about how being abused makes you a sticking plaster for all the weirdo's brought tears to my eyes, I found it extremely poignant and actually brought me a moment of personal discovery an aha moment that stopped me in my tracks and reflected something back too me..... Thankyou for writing and sharing this with the world, the world needs to see it 😊
Richard, I want to express my sympathy for what you endured. Shedding light on the nuanced experience of being a victim is crucial for people to grasp, especially in today's society. I admire your courage in sharing your story with us. The show was exceptional, delivering humor at precisely the right moments. Jessica Gunning's performance as Martha was truly phenomenal!
I think Richard Gadd has done what many of us wish we had the courage to do, which is stripping ourselves off our deepest traumas and insecurities publicly, hoping for the best, and finding a measure of peace, a more wholesome self, and coming to terms with who we are, for better or for worse. I'm fascinated by his complex, yet honest humanity, and for conveying such an intricate story for the world to enjoy, understand, and more importantly, relate to. The entire cast did an awesome job, but Richard and Jessica Gunning truly knocked it out of the park. Great show!
You'll never read this Richard, but this show has been relatable on so many levels for thousands of viewers. Whether its quotes, plot, characters, you have offered the relatable and raw story we need. Thank you for speaking on behalf of so many victims!
I rarely if ever comment on what I watch, but I'm now a 50 yr old massive fan of Jessica Gunning. She's utterly exceptional and should be lauded accordingly. Made me howl with laughter in The Outlaws, and her performance in Baby Reindeer is next level. Absolutely one to watch as well as congratulate. The writer's performance was pretty remarkable too.
Baby Reindeer is an incredible work of art. Having gone through sexual traumas in my life I can relate to a lot that is depicted in the series. It's not all black or white. Thank you for showing that. The cinematography is also impeccable. Very, very good work.
I just want to say I watched this series tonight with my mum, both of us having been through abuse. This series for both of us, started out as a random show we popped on to spend my last night at home watching together before I travelled back home. This series that started off as something lighthearted, ended up having us laughing, crying, angry and everything in between. By the end, this series had us left with tears and goosebumps. We both couldn't believe a series could communicate the cycle, stages and fonts abuse can take form of. The love bombing from and for someone who has suppressed emotional repercussions of abuse, the fear, the anger, the parts of your life falling apart, missing that gap when you need to cut ties and force every part of your manipulated brain and body to follow through with it, the lingering and limerence, the confusion, isolation, the fun and lovely times and the absolutely worst when you have to force your natural senses to walk away and deal with the shell that is left, knowing you won't experience that high or comfort again because it wasn't real or healthy. You'll know it's wrong next time so you can't excuse yourself to stay, as well as showing the shame and guilt from it all and the emotional rollercoaster it takes you on is INSANELY beautiful. THANK YOU, for putting yourself in a position to make this and to make viewers who might not always get it if they haven't experienced it, experience the highs, lows and mindfuckery all the same. The best series I've ever seen, absolutely terrific.
The line about how abuse draws in people who are unwell. Like they can smell the wounds on you. That part broke me. As someone who also empathizes with people who are sick and unwell. How hard it is to turn away when you understand there pain and delusion. The delusion that helped them survive there own life.
Phenomenal this is a masterpiece of brutal truthful storytelling. A very brave move by Richard Gadd to take this to the screen but this deserves so many awards. Simply amazing.
Not sure if you ever read this Richard but jesus that was one of the most incredible things to go on tv and mind boggling you acted that all out. People will be talking about your work for a long long tike bro and you will have given a lot of people the confidence to talk about things because you were not only brave as hell but a damn good actor
I just finished the series without stopping. The performances, the writing, the harrowing story were captivating. I did not know about Richard Gadd and his one man show before watching the series. Many times watching I was in awe of his performance. Now I know why, and I’m even more in awe. Thank you for your bravery because this story is so important to tell. May the awards season find you nominated and winning.
5:35 I got out of my situation after watching this. You sharing your story, how it affected you and how you acted out on it made me realise that I am doing the exact same thing and im glad you shared this because it’s the reason I had the gut to put an end to it. I finally understand what was going on and I feel relieved that im not alone and that I should not feel ashamed. Thank you ❤
Richard Gadd you are an amazing and brave man. I finished all 7 episodes in one sitting I was hooked. I laughed and I cried. Phenomenal piece of art and man! Bravo!
I just binge watched Baby Reindeer and the series is going to help me process my personal traumas better. I can feel it. I have never felt so understood or been able to make this much sense of myself by watching something. And knowing that there are so many people that will gain as much as I did, and feel like they can relate like I can, makes me feel less alone. I am very grateful.
This is the best piece of art I’ve seen in years. Richard is a truly phenomenal writer. It’s real, brave, honest. So honest it put things I’ve experienced in my own life into words I’ve never been able to express before. I’m blown away. Thank you Richard for sharing your story so that others can understand, learn, and feel empowered to share their own. Thank you.
I think the portrayal of guilt and attachement to the abuser is a huge relief for so many people out there. Thank you for this, my soul was comforted that someone showed people this nuanced aspect of it. This wasnt only good filmaking but a social service as well.
Just finished binge watching the whole series. Absolutely amazing in every aspect. We laughed, cried, gasped, and felt emotionally invested from beginning to end. Wow! Deserves so many accolades.
Being 38 years old and being into television series since I was 21, I have seen a LOT of shows. I am totally blown away by this, and I have not been so touched by a show in a long time. I am so happy to see something that has this level of sincerity, emotional depth and ambiguity. The acting of Richard Gadd and Jessica Gunning is simply amazing. Well done you all, and thank you so much!
I know someone who knows the director and apparently they had to cut a scene about another SA Richard went through as it was too violent. Brilliant show. Hope he’s ok.
I've never seen anything like this before and am so very grateful to Richard for being so incredibly vulnerable in so many ways to share these stories SO honestly.. All the absolute best to him!
OMG - didn't realise the main actor was playing out his own reality ! Its raw, brutal, funny and gripping. How brave of him to actually re play that part of his life....wow....
What incredible emotional intelligence and honesty in showing the ways you see your own flaws and the flaws of others. Nothing is black and white and it takes time to see that for most of us.
I wish all the happiness in the world for Richard. This broke my heart so profoundly. Everyone I think will feel deeply about this. So much love for this person and this work.
This was the most intense series I have ever watched. Many times, it was so hard to watch and yet I was magnetised and drawn in to the outstanding acting. Richard is incredibly brave and to react and go through all those emotions again and tell his side of trauma he endured. What a phenomenal and inspiring person. Also the actress who played Martha is award winning actress, her acting was out of this world. I wish this series the best success!!!
Incredibly brave of him to not only be so open about his experiences but also to be so vulnerable about the trauma and the truth about it. This was most definitely a vital conversation that needed to be had and shared; it has helped so many others to be able to share their own experiences, whether that was through a helpline, a family member or a friend and I hope that this conversation will continue to grow. And to those who haven’t felt like they have been heard yet, I truly hope that one day you will be able to, because you are just as important.
i am genuinely so thankful he got the chance to create this doc. i truly have never felt so seen in a netflix show and having been through similar traumas, it’s so validating to know i’m not the only one who felt the feelings of self doubt & blame for being assaulted. he’s truly changed my life with his story.
This touched me on multiple levels, and by the last scene in the bar I could no longer hold back the tears. This was a deeply vulnerable and courageous exploration of this young man’s horrific ordeal. Binged it in one Saturday sitting. Also Brilliantly acted by the woman, Jessica Gunning. To hit all those notes of a wounded and mad woman whom you feel sad for was simply well done! I’ll be talking about this for some time! For a British drama that takes on these deeply personal themes of abuse this brings to mind Micaela Coel in “I May destroy you”
Extremely accomplished piece of work. Insightful, accurate, funny, sad and hopeful. Superbly well acted. I suspect Gadd and Gunning may be nominated for awards. It affected me in a similar to POSE, the show created by Ryan Murphy. It treats sexuality and the fluidity of gender in a very casual yet central and essential way. It's something that is both as natural as breathing, and yet for some, also a great source of pain. When I say it affected me in a similar way to POSE, I mean this: it increased my empathy by making me less ignorant.
Brilliant! Award worthy on all counts. Stellar performances….great camera work…terrific and brave story telling. Congratulations, Richard and team Reindeer!
The part with his father made me cover my mouth with my hand and just bawl like a child. Oh the things we conceal…the dark things we don’t want to air in case it makes others judge us, blame us, hate us, freak out, turn away from us. We all do it. Everyone for different reasons, everyone to different degrees. It’s a brilliant piece of writing. It’s got everything. I love that he doesn’t try to hide his own mistakes and dark thoughts and feelings. That’s humanity. No one is totally good or bad. Everyone is some shade of grey, some darker than others. Brave piece of work. And Fiona Harvey is clearly a darkly terrible stalker of many people over many years. The platform she has given herself by ‘outing’ herself is exactly what she loves. She feels important. She feels validated when people stick uo for her or attack him. God people are dark and complicated. Imho
I related on so many topics. You spoke what my heart has felt at times. Very heartfelt and WELL DONE! His breakdown speech had me in tears, I know his feeling of shame.
Most amazing piece of work I’ve ever seen, I cried so much for him. Then I realised how I could feel so much empathy for his story that I could find empathy toward myself for the similar things that happened to me. I didn’t think any of it was his fault so why would I think it was all my fault? When his Dad said, “would you think of me as less of a man?” It broke me and then mended me back together in one line. Absolutely amazing
You have captured the experiences of the hidden masses of us who have lived through similar things to you. Despite the intensity of the content in the series, I did find a sense of peace in watching it. It was beautiful. Thank you for being brave enough to utilize your immense talent to portray your experiences so wonderfully in this show.
All the actors were so perfect for this. The story was incredible. Funny, weird, and at points, deeply touching. Couldn't help but fall in love with the guy in this. A crazy but very relatable show. Thanks to him to share and Netflix to bring to life. Highly recommended 10/10
An absolutely fantastic viewing. Very well written & produced! As a Scottish man myself, the dad in the series was 10/10 everything about this series was perfect!
Best production I’ve ever seen made out of the UK. This is honestly incredible!! Thank you for sharing such a powerful powerful emotive story and being so kind on how you deliver it too
I'm two episodes away from finishing this series, but i've had to take a bit of a break away. The way this show feels like you're living the same life, it dug down deep in my emotions and perceptions. Truly art. The most impactful series I've seen in years. 10/10 and deserves all the awards.
This is one of the best series I've ever seen. It took a tremendous amount of courage to put his story out there and it has affected so many people in so many meaningful ways. He should be beyond proud. Everyone involved did a stellar job!
The lady who played Martha was absolutely brilliant, very talented she reminded me of kathy bates in misery, she deserves an award she is so talented!
Jessica Gunning! Very underrated actress
My thought exactly!
Watch her in The Outlaws written by and starring Stephen Merchant........oh and the inimitable Christopher Walken. Her performance is flawless.
Not quite Annie more tender and torn without the brutal murder
I agree, she gave justice to the character.
His father broke me. The “good luck with the transsexual” line was the funniest and most touching line
I was sobbing so hard I literally couldn’t breathe
I also would like to add in the hug (instead of the handshake that they made seem like is the norm between them) and the extra giddy wave he gave his son when he said good luck.
As a trans person myself, I loved that lmao.
Same lmfaoo I literally laughed! Hardest I laughed during the show.
Was funny, wish I could be touched by it though. Instead it just seemed like settling for more insanity.
This is one of the bravest pieces I've ever watched. I laughed, I cried. Brilliant, just brilliant.
I feel exactly the same about the series 🙏
Bot (or just another account made just to make more reviews), literally an account made a few hours ago at the time of me posting this comment.
Literally the courage to go back to the darkest times in your life and create something good out of it isnt something most people can do. This man is absolutely amazing
Me too. Wiping up the tears now. Brilliantly heartbreaking.
Incredible 😢
"i hated myself so much more than i could ever love her, and i loved her so much"
most heartbreaking thing I’ve ever heard
Insane line
It's unadulterated self awareness
i was sobbing so hard at this part
1.6k up votes = 1.6k abandonment fears, and how disgustingly inadequate services are to deal with a serious pandemic of the 21st century
When I first started this series, I thought the actor was playing the role TOO well. His trauma, his mannerisms. It made so much sense that it was played by the real victim. So well done.
I think thats the amazing thing about the story. He didnt tell it the way that he's the victim. It's a very nuanced territory.
By the surviver non the less.
He had an amazing take on it. This was so brave, and I hope he can heal from all the trauma.
@@ilmnt.guidance true. he was honest about being toxic himself.
Fantastic Series
It deserves all the awards. From beginning to end: absolutely brilliant.
Literally. This show is unlike anything ive seen before
@@rayhelmathews3829
Thank you
@@sugarbear1965 For what ?
“Some people run by packing their bags and some people run away by staying in the same place for too long!” -- that line was deep and profound.
Me too.. it might help me 😥
Me too, literally many of the scenes/ lines called me out. Triggering.
Me too friend.
I loved that line. Kinda scary that as I read your comment it just played that bit.
exactly this
You never see something this brutally candid anymore. Its a game changer of a show. I fucking loved it.
Maybe because you were not in it?
That part.
could only of come from the isle of the UK. a long tradition of unearthing the tales that hit at the heart of the matter.
i swear
@@scoon2117it was not largely fabricated. It’s a dramatization. We’ve got to be better at media literacy, as a society.
That part when the dad says he was in the catholic church...sent chills!!!
What happens in Catholic Church?
@@Ririfentynews paedophilia
@@Ririfentynews dont know if this a joke, but the catholic church has a reputation for a lot of priest being caught diddling kids by abusing their position of power and the church tries to protect the priest by paying hush money to the victims families. And it make sense because religious people are easier to control and priest are trusted by a lot of church goers and kids are more likely to listen and do whatever the priest tells them to do and then you have the backing of your church and other weirdo priest, its a very easy position to get and easy to take advantage of for kiddy lovers and in general for people who are abusers or people who like to have power.
@@Ririfentynews it’s so hard to fully explain because unfortunately it’s prevalent not only in the Catholic churches but other religious “churches” as well, but it’s a well known fact that many Catholic Churches have been grounds for lots of sexual abuse of minors, notably with young males. There’s been hundreds of cases that have been reported and thousands that have not been formally reported due to religious trauma and backlash towards victims.
So much said in so few words
“What did they do to you?” I literally gasped at that line. The mentally ill stalker saw right through him! Amazing piece of work.
I actually think this is a phrase and tactic used to make him feel vulnerable. A narcissistic move.
@@HildaJ8I’d say, in context of the story, maybe not so much, because she later insists, and even says something along the lines of “it wasn’t a woman, It was a man right?”
@@chicken0w044notably only after she already asked „it was a woman right? a heartbreak?“ and he doesn’t react to her satisfaction. she asks the same question but with a man a couple of episodes later, it‘s literally just manipulation
@@HildaJ8came here to write the same thing. I think this is something that people who has met someone like that or been through similar things can easily see but not the others. People like her, they know very well what to say and to who. Every step they take is to manipulate you and we, regular people don’t really notice it , sometimes it can take years.
About her saying ”it wasn’t a woman right? It was a man” is not so hard to guess, abusers are usually men. Also, usually it is not so hard to understand who is abused who is not…
Baby Reindeer is an undeniably bingeworthy masterpiece! But what truly sets it apart is that we get to see the psychological complexity of being groomed, abused, stalked through the eyes of a man - a perspective sadly often overlooked. It shines a light in that dirty corner that no one wants to look at. I'm sure a lot of people who lived in the shadows of their own shame will finally feel seen 🖤
The confession of his parents when he told them. I sobbed so hard! 😭
For real.. I assume you watched the whole thing and I'm not spoiling anything but in the final episode when his dad looks at him and says, "What about me? Would you treat me any differently?".... The confused look on Donnie's face as his dad says "I grew up in the Catholic Church"... and then his realization that he and his father had both been raped was a gut punch. So much shame washed away as they healed together. 😢 Beautiful
@@sleazeberg Totally 🖤 I loved that it wasn't just between father and son - the mother knew well what her husband had to carry all these years and now her son too...although it was heavy, the scene lifted a weight off everyone's shoulders. No one had to carry it alone anymore
This 1000 percent! Very well articulated.
Men get abused too women don't seem to understand that..where I work is always about the wrongs of women no voice for men no opinion allowed just agree..the worst abuse I ever had was from women and I'm a man...this film is very important.
This story was traumatic and it made me super uncomfortable. Thank you for sharing bits of your story. From being groomed, sexually assaulted, stalked, abused in every way. It needed to be shared. Let your success be a MASSIVE middle finger to the villians who tried to break you.
He also wanted to bring empathy, understanding toward Martha situation. Not a middle finger but a way to open a conversation on mental illnesses, the complexity of the mind and traumas.
@@Soleil-vk9ts Yes, I noticed that. I work in Healthcare, therefore I have empathy for those who are clearly unwell. No doubt he was living a nightmare, however I admire how careful they were in her portrayal.
@@Soleil-vk9ts Stop feeling sorry for this woman 🙄 she’s not only stalker but a racist too judging by her social media posts! I have no
Sympathy, she has ruined lives.
He was abused but could have handels the situation better, like not taking drugs, keeping contact with martha etc .. not to be rude but u sleep in the bed u make. he did this on himself.
@@mattisketels8939 Nobody said his decision making was right. However, if you've ever been in a difficult mental state, you are vulnerable to anything. Can we congratulate him on getting to other side after his failures? There are so many souls who go into a spiral and end up early in the grave.
What blows my mind is that Richard is my age. He’s only about to be 35. You can tell he’s lived a long life already. His story is wild. And I think his retelling of it is a form of therapy for him. He’s wise beyond his years, out of necessity. I’m glad he’s come out the other side of all these experiences.
35???
Retelling always heals... even more when your not alone.
He's also a psycho who enjoyed getting stalked to some extent and got off on the "shame" he felt when dating a trans woman when there's nothing wrong with dating trans people if that's what you're in to and subjected her to that emotional roller-coaster. I'm not saying he deserved to get stalked but he low key got a thrill out of it by his own admission and even slept with his stalker.
He looks about 50
@@itsneveramannequin8737 That's what drugs can do to people. My great uncle was an addict for most of his life and I've seen pictures of him in his early 30s where he looked about 60.
Richard Gadd just created an entire new genre: the autobiographical true crime psycho-thriller dramedy. The best piece of writing and acting of the year. He just gave a new entire meaning to the words "brutally honest"!
Your genre name is perfection! EXACTLY what unique category this show falls into 😂🎉
Except he now is reluctant to call it " true" but now "emotionally true". Aspects were exaggerated for dramatic impact ,and no one was convinced of stalking.
Well said. His story and your comment give me a sense of motivation to write and film my abuse story.
One of which evolved around my sibling I no longer speak to. Seven years since I have seen in seven years.
Mom was diagnosed with dementia. Thirty days (to be precise) after her diagnosis, my sibling coerced our mom to sign a bank loan for the amount of 300k. A home equity loan.
My sibling snatched every penny out of our mom’s life savings and used a portion of it to hire a lawyer. She painted me as the devil’s twin.
In reality, I was taking care of our mom’s needs. Twenty hours per day for 2.5 years. Bathing her, changing her depends, feeding her, etc etc. My sister would praise me in private for doing a wonderful job in caring for our mom, and then the next minute, call the police to report me for elder abuse. I wasn’t arrested but I was treated like a criminal.
My sibling used to work for APS/CPS and knows judges. APS is Adult Protective Services. At home, her and her son financially and verbally abused our mom.
Court battles at probate court was an uphill battle. I won those court appearances but at a huge price. Sibling’s lawyer was playing dirty and I had only God to get me through my worst nightmare.
watch I May Destroy You, this show is good, but certainly not the first
that liner of “being an open wound they can sniff at” was one of those statements that wakes you up and lives with you. It perfectly sums up the cycle of abuse and dark parts of human psyche. Ugh, just a work of art all the way around. I hope this is healing on a new level for you.
That line was amazing.
What scene did he say this?
@@greekfreek21 it was during his scene where he confesses about the abuse and stuff that happened to him in the comedy set.
For me as well that line had a biggest effect on me (although there were plenty of “big lines” in the story telling), woke up still thinking about it. So simply put words together and still have the deepest and truest meaning that never has been so accurately said before. He really went through the trauma otherwise couldn’t come up with gems like that.
that line made me cry because reminded me of many things that i lived in the past. I been abused and falsely accused of abuse by my ex gf. The people that supposed to help me also tried to take advantage of me and broke into my house and stole my savings.
The way he can go through this all over again is just flabbergasting
That’s the part that amazes me. I just keep asking - how did you do that again?
🤦♀️ That's the part that helps people gets through their traumas. Not talking about it is the trauma.
Thats why hes amazing. Literally amazing
@@mammybelle7302This!!! You have to face your past or you’ll be stuck forever.
same, especially the abuse part, it was hard to watch
The story, the camera, the scenery, the film set, the cast... everything is phenomenal. Plus: Not a single bad actor. No unnecessary dialogue, no pointless scene.
I can't remember ever seeing anything better.
The wig the glasses the catch phrase, brilliant
Couldn't agree more
It's a surprise to me that it's the director that played the main character. He wasn't acting but exposing his raw emotions to his audience. I teared up and cry cause i know victoms of rape and i know the kind of emptions loved ones deal with. We need more unfiltered things like these
true! I didn't fast forward, I watched
and no forced inclusion bc he really was attracted to man at some point and also woman.
The trans woman was a mixture of two.
And she was a necessity character on the plot.
All the actors were amazing. 😍😭
Richard’s empathy for “Martha” was one of many aspects of this story that broke my heart.
I didn’t get the ending? Was he in love with Martha?
@@FlowerGirl-lp4kbNo, it’s more that he discovered that Martha, despite her behaviour, still had tangible relatable emotions driving her madness, and that the patterns Donny observed to have destroyed his life were present in hers as well.
@@FlowerGirl-lp4kb He understood that her behavior, just as his own behavior, came from trauma. It just manifests itself differently for different people.
Truly, I had a stalker once and I remember breaking down in tears to my best friend because I was accidentally nice to him in passing yrs later and started receiving threats again and she got so mad at me like wtf why would you have even acknowledged him!? And she was right. But that ONE smile started it all over again. And I def felt bad for him at first until he involved my family then I had to get a restraining order. It's the oddest situation really, I was once group friends with that person so it's like a million emotions in one and for some reason a lot of shame and guilt. I love this series and they captured each side almost perfectly I think. (Because every situation is a bit different obviously) It's not always a black&white situation. And it's caused me trauma for years so I applaud him hugely for creating this & sharing his story to help others.
Couldn’t agree more
The actress who played Martha is phenomenal
She really is!
@@amanda.s9948the real Martha herself thought she was Scottish so…
fr she made me mad asf
My fiancé asked me “why did you watch it if you knew it could harm you?”
I told him about my experience watching this, while also being a victim of sexual assault. He knew, since a long time ago.
It was… triggering, to say the least.
But I stayed.
And I watched.
And I cried and panicked and had to pause a couple of times.
It wasnt the scenes of the actual abuse what triggered me.
It was the aftermath, your description of shame, the pathetic sense of worthlessness…
When you go through these things you kinda know who really went through this and who is writing it just for show…
I knew you knew.
And I felt seen.
No one tells you how to go through this.
No one tells you “omg girl same!”
Its so hard to find a place to talk about this, without being seen as a victim, as the poor thing, as a broken person.
Watching this was so so harmful but at last, I was seen.
Thank you.
I wish the best of recoveries for you, you are a brave soul.
Edit: Thank you to everyone for all the kind words, I wrote this on a very VERY vulnerable state,, but I needed to express myself somehow. I wasnt expecting to reach so many beautiful souls.
After writing this I seeked therapy once more, the wound was once again open but it made me realize how many things I havent talked about because of shame.
Richard Gadd, you are making a difference. You may not read this but to anyone else who has:
Help, compassion and understanding are always out there. Be kind to yourself and others, we've all been through so much.
Yes! I agree
wow thank u for sharing- i couldn’t describe my experience watching better than this.
Thanks for sharing your story iam going to watch it tonight iam Surivior of domestic violence and sa my son said might be too much for your mum but I said I want to watch it .because we come through and come out the other side stronger hope ur OK now darling ❤❤❤
What's wrong with being seen as a victim or a broken thing if you are those things? You're just reinforcing the shame and stigma
@@insertname2035
I dont think you understood what I meant to say.
Talking about this with friends, loved ones, family: you see their faces and how they see you either with distrust, disgust, sadness.
Specially coming from the culture I come from.
You are “dirty” afterwards.
I cant really talk about this with no one I know because all these emotions it brings.
At least watching baby reindeer I felt seen.
Thats what I meant.
I knew it was based upon a true story but had no idea just how personal it truly was to you, the main actor...your own story. This is incredibly brave. To put yourself through this and do it in such an amazing way. Massively impressed
Same !!! 😮😮😮 I didn’t know it happened to him ! Still can’t believe he slept with Martha though ! Wild
"true story"
Yes, I did not realize the creator/writer was also the actor…
he didn't lol watch again @lynahiacampbell8232
@@JulianLeahyExactly. I have a feeling that 90% of it is made up.
I just stayed up all night watching this, an incredible show that highlights the best of British television and filmmaking. Never seen anything like it before, amazing!!
Same here❤
Me too! I can’t stop thinking about it.
Me too!! I was so sleepy but I needed to watch it through. Very unique limited series. Loved it.
Samezies! ❤
I thought of Micaela Cole’s “I may destroy you”
Genuinely the best show I’ve seen in a while. The casting was absolutely perfect, and the realness of it all was so insanely prevalent and beautiful. 10/10
Absolutely!
The line that stuck with me the most was “I’m addicted to hating myself”
The fact he had to act out what he experienced makes this man braver than most.
I didn't blink the entire series.
The bravery to not only tell your truth but to reenact and relive it is extraordinary.
I hope Richard and everyone involved knows that they are truly worthy of the peace, love and joy that they are longing for.
I don't think that's possible to not blink throughout the whole show
Such respect for Richard bringing such a traumatic and frightening time period of his lifetime to the screen, and as a play as well. Honestly horrific the things he went through, but to be able to re tell that and relive those experiences again is such a strong thing to do. Love the show, big respect to everyone who made it
Binged this yesterday. Cannot believe he played himself. That must’ve been incredibly painful & difficult. So freaking brave! Brilliant bit of work.
It’s cathartic. And it’s obviously part of his repetition compulsion, but in a healthy way. In the show you see how he gets stuck it patterns of re-enacting the abuses. While doing it artistically it can help the world.
The on stage mental breakdown scene has to win some kind of award
Indeed.
It was so uncomfortable to watch cause it was so raw and real,like you were right there in the audience reliving this nightmare with him
Yeah but that didn’t even happen though. Watch the real video of it. Completely different
i really feel pain and cry on that scene
@@Dontatmebruvdoes that matter though? he never claimed every single piece of content shown is an exact recreation of his real life. It’s a true story, but it’s also art… which means he’s allowed to fiddle with it in ways he sees fit. It’s like the stand-up scenes, majority of the responses to his jokes are dead silence, in actual videos of his comedy shows there’s laughter here and there; that doesn’t make him a liar, that’s most likely how HE perceived it. a lot of us view embarrassing moments 10x worse than they actually happened. That’s what a lot of this show consists of, things he would’ve wished happened; things that actually happened & things he feared happening, it’s all intertwined left up to the viewer to dig into. That’s what art allows - interpretation. My final point being, his experiences are very much real and should not be invalidated by dramatized scenes & storytelling.
The lady who played martha should win awards. She is completely marvelous!
You could say “Marthaless”
@@ES-hv9nv lol good one
Just finished watching this and I'm blown away. He really found a way to express how complicated abusive situations are. Really beautifully done.
I just binged it, I’m still processing. It touched on so many important issues, wow. It’s so well done. I’m sad that this even happened to him, but I’m glad he’s willing to put it out there and to facilitate conversations.
Dear Richard, you have no idea how life changing this series is! I was challenged, cried, realised things from my own life, felt less alone in my own abuse, and grew more empathy for people in my life who are self-sabotaging. Seeing you look better now provides me peace.
If you have the energy and emotional capacity, how would you feel about sharing about why you returned to your abusers home?
I hope you're in a place in life where you feel deserving of happiness, fulfilment and love for self. Bless you
this!!!!
I hope I feel the same way when I watch this later today.
The way I perceived it Richard was deeply manipulated by the alleged success to fulfill his dreams of becoming famous and finally liked by other people that led him through that hell over and over again. The inner need to pursue his dream being worth the abuse in his manipulated mind, a necessary sacrifice to make even though it hurts. And if it hurts less with every time it happens and you've come too far to stop now, you just close your eyes and run into the same wall again and again.
I wanted to ask the same question
That's a very thoughtful way of asking this question that I also want to know the answer of!
I also want to know what drove him to catalog & continually listen to Martha's voice messages.... my husband found it very odd. Lol
The part where he has the realization of "This man is trying to control your mind, you need to leave" hit me the hardest. I've gone through a v similar situation and it's so bizarre how you can miss so many red flags just to snap into reality so hard.
As someone that was raped as a 14 year old child by a 19 year old after being drugged, this really resonated. I’m so glad this man was brave enough to show the inner shame and turmoil we all share as survivors. What an amazingly honest portrayal. I hope this wins awards and helps young people understand more about how assaults happens, so they can feel empowered to report it in a way our generation didn’t know how to. I know I was told “no means no”, so I thought it was my fault because I couldn’t say no. Passed out people can’t give consent!
Perhaps the most honest, raw, brave, hilarious, and tragic pieces of television I've ever seen. Mind blowingly good. Wishing the very best in life to Mr Gadd.
Him reliving the assault scene is actually pretty crazy. I still wonder if he’s ok…
Good point. Pretty wild
He needs a lot of support and help I think he has this, he probably also has ups and downs but I hope he is well
As a victim myself, it's kind of a weird and very personal situation and only those who've been through it, know the best way to heal. A lot of the times, victims are re-traumatized each and every time they share the details regarding the abuse that took place. Some victims go on to victimize others in a desperate attempt to reverse the shame they still deeply feel by playing the role of the aggressor. Then their are the very few who can openly talk about it or in even fewer cases, walk not only themsleves but the entire world through what happened and eventually that pain will start to evolve into catharsis when others suffering with the same trauma feel open enough to let you know how much they relate to your experience and can finally find the courage to confront their own pain in turn beginning a process of healing as well. I may not have worded everything right but I hope it makes enough sense to try and explain it a bit.
He will never be okay but he will have better days than some
@@moodforeverdo you know him?
For such heavy material, I binged the entire series easily. Very triggering stuff but handled with such care and (dark) humour. Richard Gadd is on my radar now (in a non-stalkery way)
As a victim, watching this series provided so much clarity of my own actions and feelings, and allowed me to open up to my husband about the terrible things I think about. I don't think I've ever felt this connected to a story.
When I was 16 I was SA by my uncle, someone i looked up to as a father figure my entire childhood. 14 years later and I still can’t bring myself to tell anyone. I have forgiven my uncle but I will never forget. I can definitely relate to the shame you feel when something like that happens, wanting to ignore it and act like it never happened.
Im so sorry for you hope you doing better😢
I'm so sorry to hear that. Please try and tell someone, you can't keep carrying this around and the people who love and care about you should help you as much as you need.
LLik mih
That’s messed up…ur uncle is an ass
The trailer does NOT do this justice AT ALL. Each episode hits harder and harder. I wasn't ready for this. Anyone who's ever struggled with self hatred or is LGBT should watch this.
I had to take a break because ot felt so real. Can't wait to finish
Honestly I think all of us should watch this, if for nothing else; understanding.
As a gay man, I find it pretty insulting that you think gay men and lesbians would be uniquely affected by a show about a confused bisexual with a thing for MTF transsexuals. Also, it is literally impossible to be “LGBT.” Homosexuality and bisexuality are mutually sexual orientations, and transgender identity isn’t even a sexual orientation at all.
yeah this show was incredible !!
@@floralendurance the first episode w/ the male abuser. i had to stop watching for a bit after
Telling his mother and father what happened was heart breaking
His parents must be heartbroken to hear those madness that happened to their son too 😢
And yet, it’s such a privilege to have parents you can tell everything with confidence.
The part when his father told him he had been abused in church and asked “Would you see me less as man?” broke me. The scene had me in tears
He's truly an artist!! The rawness and vulnerability in this series is just something I've never really seen before
This show feels more like an art piece rather than a show now that Richard explains it more in depth. One of my favorite shows I’ve ever watched, I hope he makes more.
He could easily make this story about being a victim, but the choice to investigate and ask himself his actions is so brave and made this an unique peace. 11/10.
I found ‘the making of’ as emotionally powerful as the series. Richard deserves accolades for this raw piece of writing! And both him and Jessica Oscar’s. Amazing. More as real and powerful as this please Netflix!
I watched it back to back, couldn't stop watching, I found it very very moving, the part where Donny breaks down during his set and describes about how being abused makes you a sticking plaster for all the weirdo's brought tears to my eyes, I found it extremely poignant and actually brought me a moment of personal discovery an aha moment that stopped me in my tracks and reflected something back too me..... Thankyou for writing and sharing this with the world, the world needs to see it 😊
Richard, I want to express my sympathy for what you endured. Shedding light on the nuanced experience of being a victim is crucial for people to grasp, especially in today's society. I admire your courage in sharing your story with us. The show was exceptional, delivering humor at precisely the right moments. Jessica Gunning's performance as Martha was truly phenomenal!
I think Richard Gadd has done what many of us wish we had the courage to do, which is stripping ourselves off our deepest traumas and insecurities publicly, hoping for the best, and finding a measure of peace, a more wholesome self, and coming to terms with who we are, for better or for worse. I'm fascinated by his complex, yet honest humanity, and for conveying such an intricate story for the world to enjoy, understand, and more importantly, relate to. The entire cast did an awesome job, but Richard and Jessica Gunning truly knocked it out of the park. Great show!
You'll never read this Richard, but this show has been relatable on so many levels for thousands of viewers. Whether its quotes, plot, characters, you have offered the relatable and raw story we need. Thank you for speaking on behalf of so many victims!
I rarely if ever comment on what I watch, but I'm now a 50 yr old massive fan of Jessica Gunning. She's utterly exceptional and should be lauded accordingly. Made me howl with laughter in The Outlaws, and her performance in Baby Reindeer is next level. Absolutely one to watch as well as congratulate. The writer's performance was pretty remarkable too.
I just realised who she was from that series and WOW I had no idea that she was ALL THAT. What a talent. Incredible
Calm down Martha.
YES
Baby Reindeer is an incredible work of art. Having gone through sexual traumas in my life I can relate to a lot that is depicted in the series. It's not all black or white. Thank you for showing that. The cinematography is also impeccable. Very, very good work.
I just want to say I watched this series tonight with my mum, both of us having been through abuse. This series for both of us, started out as a random show we popped on to spend my last night at home watching together before I travelled back home. This series that started off as something lighthearted, ended up having us laughing, crying, angry and everything in between. By the end, this series had us left with tears and goosebumps. We both couldn't believe a series could communicate the cycle, stages and fonts abuse can take form of. The love bombing from and for someone who has suppressed emotional repercussions of abuse, the fear, the anger, the parts of your life falling apart, missing that gap when you need to cut ties and force every part of your manipulated brain and body to follow through with it, the lingering and limerence, the confusion, isolation, the fun and lovely times and the absolutely worst when you have to force your natural senses to walk away and deal with the shell that is left, knowing you won't experience that high or comfort again because it wasn't real or healthy. You'll know it's wrong next time so you can't excuse yourself to stay, as well as showing the shame and guilt from it all and the emotional rollercoaster it takes you on is INSANELY beautiful. THANK YOU, for putting yourself in a position to make this and to make viewers who might not always get it if they haven't experienced it, experience the highs, lows and mindfuckery all the same. The best series I've ever seen, absolutely terrific.
Give Richard Gadd all the awards. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 Baby Reindeer is a masterpiece. Much love and respect to you. 🙏🏼❤️
The line about how abuse draws in people who are unwell. Like they can smell the wounds on you. That part broke me. As someone who also empathizes with people who are sick and unwell. How hard it is to turn away when you understand there pain and delusion. The delusion that helped them survive there own life.
Phenomenal this is a masterpiece of brutal truthful storytelling. A very brave move by Richard Gadd to take this to the screen but this deserves so many awards. Simply amazing.
Not sure if you ever read this Richard but jesus that was one of the most incredible things to go on tv and mind boggling you acted that all out.
People will be talking about your work for a long long tike bro and you will have given a lot of people the confidence to talk about things because you were not only brave as hell but a damn good actor
I just finished the series without stopping. The performances, the writing, the harrowing story were captivating. I did not know about Richard Gadd and his one man show before watching the series. Many times watching I was in awe of his performance. Now I know why, and I’m even more in awe. Thank you for your bravery because this story is so important to tell. May the awards season find you nominated and winning.
I lol when the dad showed support when he was leaving on the train, made me cry also
Same I finished the whole series last afternoon. 😭
5:35 I got out of my situation after watching this. You sharing your story, how it affected you and how you acted out on it made me realise that I am doing the exact same thing and im glad you shared this because it’s the reason I had the gut to put an end to it. I finally understand what was going on and I feel relieved that im not alone and that I should not feel ashamed. Thank you ❤
Richard Gadd you are an amazing and brave man. I finished all 7 episodes in one sitting I was hooked. I laughed and I cried. Phenomenal piece of art and man! Bravo!
so good!!!!
I just binge watched Baby Reindeer and the series is going to help me process my personal traumas better. I can feel it. I have never felt so understood or been able to make this much sense of myself by watching something. And knowing that there are so many people that will gain as much as I did, and feel like they can relate like I can, makes me feel less alone. I am very grateful.
Absolutely loved this series. Disturbing, sad, courageous. Such a wonderfully told story - and Jessica Gunning was phenomenal! ❤❤❤
This show deeply moved me. I've never seen storytelling done like this before. The creator should be extremely proud
This is the best piece of art I’ve seen in years. Richard is a truly phenomenal writer. It’s real, brave, honest. So honest it put things I’ve experienced in my own life into words I’ve never been able to express before. I’m blown away. Thank you Richard for sharing your story so that others can understand, learn, and feel empowered to share their own. Thank you.
I think the portrayal of guilt and attachement to the abuser is a huge relief for so many people out there. Thank you for this, my soul was comforted that someone showed people this nuanced aspect of it. This wasnt only good filmaking but a social service as well.
Absolutely incredible series. A MUST watch. Best show I’ve watched in a long long time.
Just finished binge watching the whole series. Absolutely amazing in every aspect. We laughed, cried, gasped, and felt emotionally invested from beginning to end.
Wow! Deserves so many accolades.
I cried so much. Every parent should watch this to be aware of a lot of things. Thank you for sharing Richard.
Being 38 years old and being into television series since I was 21, I have seen a LOT of shows. I am totally blown away by this, and I have not been so touched by a show in a long time. I am so happy to see something that has this level of sincerity, emotional depth and ambiguity. The acting of Richard Gadd and Jessica Gunning is simply amazing. Well done you all, and thank you so much!
The show was indeed very heavy, yet comforting in it's own way.
Richard Gadd did absolutly fantastic!!
I know someone who knows the director and apparently they had to cut a scene about another SA Richard went through as it was too violent. Brilliant show. Hope he’s ok.
Yeah people never want to understand or believe how many rapes we go through.
i hope hes okay too.
What happened in that scene, if you know?
@@majj2370they don’t.. just looking for attention.
@@maybeen9294don’t know if TH-cam allows it but the second word is assault, I’ll let you fill in the blank
I've never seen anything like this before and am so very grateful to Richard for being so incredibly vulnerable in so many ways to share these stories SO honestly.. All the absolute best to him!
OMG - didn't realise the main actor was playing out his own reality !
Its raw, brutal, funny and gripping.
How brave of him to actually re play that part of his life....wow....
What incredible emotional intelligence and honesty in showing the ways you see your own flaws and the flaws of others. Nothing is black and white and it takes time to see that for most of us.
The whole show was absolutely stunning, brilliantly written. He deserves all the success in life, and I hope he finds his own peace.
Thank you for sharing this very personal story with the world. It's nice to know that I'm not alone in my hurt and confusion.
I wish all the happiness in the world for Richard. This broke my heart so profoundly. Everyone I think will feel deeply about this. So much love for this person and this work.
This was the most intense series I have ever watched. Many times, it was so hard to watch and yet I was magnetised and drawn in to the outstanding acting. Richard is incredibly brave and to react and go through all those emotions again and tell his side of trauma he endured. What a phenomenal and inspiring person. Also the actress who played Martha is award winning actress, her acting was out of this world. I wish this series the best success!!!
Incredibly brave of him to not only be so open about his experiences but also to be so vulnerable about the trauma and the truth about it. This was most definitely a vital conversation that needed to be had and shared; it has helped so many others to be able to share their own experiences, whether that was through a helpline, a family member or a friend and I hope that this conversation will continue to grow. And to those who haven’t felt like they have been heard yet, I truly hope that one day you will be able to, because you are just as important.
i am genuinely so thankful he got the chance to create this doc. i truly have never felt so seen in a netflix show and having been through similar traumas, it’s so validating to know i’m not the only one who felt the feelings of self doubt & blame for being assaulted. he’s truly changed my life with his story.
This is a masterpiece: writing and acting so good are rare. It's so harrowing and honest and intense...wow. Thank you.
He relived this all over again - bonkers brave … sat through it all evening, could not look away.
This touched me on multiple levels, and by the last scene in the bar I could no longer hold back the tears. This was a deeply vulnerable and courageous exploration of this young man’s horrific ordeal. Binged it in one Saturday sitting. Also Brilliantly acted by the woman, Jessica Gunning. To hit all those notes of a wounded and mad woman whom you feel sad for was simply well done! I’ll be talking about this for some time!
For a British drama that takes on these deeply personal themes of abuse this brings to mind Micaela Coel in “I May destroy you”
This is perfect a series I have ever seen. It should be nominated and win every award... 10 out of 10. Absolute perfection!
He is so brave. Idk if he knows how special this show is. He should be really proud of himself
This series is simply a masterpiece. Well done Richard Gadd. Well done Netflix.
This show was incredible. Showing sides of life usually hushed up. The acting was amazing. Such a brave man
Extremely accomplished piece of work. Insightful, accurate, funny, sad and hopeful. Superbly well acted. I suspect Gadd and Gunning may be nominated for awards. It affected me in a similar to POSE, the show created by Ryan Murphy. It treats sexuality and the fluidity of gender in a very casual yet central and essential way. It's something that is both as natural as breathing, and yet for some, also a great source of pain.
When I say it affected me in a similar way to POSE, I mean this: it increased my empathy by making me less ignorant.
Brilliant! Award worthy on all counts. Stellar performances….great camera work…terrific and brave story telling. Congratulations, Richard and team Reindeer!
The part with his father made me cover my mouth with my hand and just bawl like a child.
Oh the things we conceal…the dark things we don’t want to air in case it makes others judge us, blame us, hate us, freak out, turn away from us. We all do it. Everyone for different reasons, everyone to different degrees.
It’s a brilliant piece of writing. It’s got everything. I love that he doesn’t try to hide his own mistakes and dark thoughts and feelings. That’s humanity. No one is totally good or bad. Everyone is some shade of grey, some darker than others.
Brave piece of work.
And Fiona Harvey is clearly a darkly terrible stalker of many people over many years. The platform she has given herself by ‘outing’ herself is exactly what she loves. She feels important. She feels validated when people stick uo for her or attack him.
God people are dark and complicated.
Imho
I related on so many topics. You spoke what my heart has felt at times. Very heartfelt and WELL DONE!
His breakdown speech had me in tears, I know his feeling of shame.
Absolutely incredible. Raw. Real. Heartbreaking complex. So many layers. Best thing I’ve seen forever.
Most amazing piece of work I’ve ever seen, I cried so much for him. Then I realised how I could feel so much empathy for his story that I could find empathy toward myself for the similar things that happened to me. I didn’t think any of it was his fault so why would I think it was all my fault? When his Dad said, “would you think of me as less of a man?” It broke me and then mended me back together in one line. Absolutely amazing
You have captured the experiences of the hidden masses of us who have lived through similar things to you. Despite the intensity of the content in the series, I did find a sense of peace in watching it. It was beautiful. Thank you for being brave enough to utilize your immense talent to portray your experiences so wonderfully in this show.
All the actors were so perfect for this. The story was incredible. Funny, weird, and at points, deeply touching. Couldn't help but fall in love with the guy in this. A crazy but very relatable show. Thanks to him to share and Netflix to bring to life. Highly recommended 10/10
An absolutely fantastic viewing. Very well written & produced! As a Scottish man myself, the dad in the series was 10/10 everything about this series was perfect!
Best production I’ve ever seen made out of the UK. This is honestly incredible!!
Thank you for sharing such a powerful powerful emotive story and being so kind on how you deliver it too
I'm two episodes away from finishing this series, but i've had to take a bit of a break away. The way this show feels like you're living the same life, it dug down deep in my emotions and perceptions. Truly art. The most impactful series I've seen in years. 10/10 and deserves all the awards.
I love this man. The depth of his words. All my respect to him and his work.
This is one of the best series I've ever seen. It took a tremendous amount of courage to put his story out there and it has affected so many people in so many meaningful ways. He should be beyond proud. Everyone involved did a stellar job!