Much of the time people get rich by being clever. They do something smart, it kicks off for them. Sometimes they're also likeable. Other people want to support them, wanting to give them things such as money or items. Some people win some people lose. That's all there is to it.
@@Anybodyelse2294 thank fuck. Duck Dynasty Dave Portnoy going through coke withdrawals is the end game. Hopefully he'll have a fort made out of card board boxes by then
Dave PLEASEEEE dont stop the package openings! Its the funniest part , not much to do these days and I look forward to watching this at bedtime, thanks for the giggles man!
I think he does it on purpose to keep up with his image of literally giving so little fucks that he doesn’t even take the time to read a companies name before just rambling it incorrectly lol.
Damn! I've been waiting for this review. This is my favorite frozen pizza by far. You gotta cook the pizza straight on the rack with no tray to get that nice crunchiness. Even says so on the instructions!
The best way to do a CPK frozen pizza review is if you do their take and bake for $5. However you have to order an entree along with the take and bake.
As someone who lives in California, People who say California doesn't know how to do Pizza, FAKE NEWS, California has some great Pizza spots, you don't have to be a rocket scientist to know how to make great Pizza, we have Brick Ovens, Stone Fire, and all the same Tools that East Coast Pizza has. A Great Oven, Freshly Rolled Dough, Homemade Sauce, Fresh Toppings, great Cheese Mix, and skilled Pizza Maker's, is all you really need, it's no big secret, I worked in the Pizza Industry in California for about 25 years, and we have some great Pizza, Dave needs to come out West.
Memes aside, this pandemic changed the best pizza reviews to the best descent into madness documentary ever made. And I'm fucking loving every second of it.
Dave is completely unhinged, nobody knows the rules
A fucking tripod would help...ever knows we can't see shit.
Michael BallsPenis S+ tier comment
coke is one hell of a drug
😂
@@alcoholicssynonymous4151 qqqu yiu I
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When dave dies of cocaine overdose, and they do a best moments montage these videos will crack top 3 moments.
"Cocaine overdose" lmao
He’s clearly not high on coke lmao
bahahaha
One purple messiah, everyone knows he just killed an 8ball before the video
This has to be one of the best videos in years. So chaotic. Love it.
Rich people get the most free shit. One bite everybody knows the rules.
To be fair, most of this ain't free, they're sending it for the exposure.
@@Tekshipie the irony is still present
@@Tekshipie It's free in that Dave didn't have to pay for it. It's not a loss for the companies because of the exposure...
Yeah except half of it's rotten pizza
Much of the time people get rich by being clever. They do something smart, it kicks off for them. Sometimes they're also likeable. Other people want to support them, wanting to give them things such as money or items. Some people win some people lose. That's all there is to it.
“I’m like a purple messiah.” Priceless
He needs to quit doing so much adderall lol
He looks like Barney.
He’s legitimately going crazy, give him a week and he’ll be ready to screen for the next joker movie.
Top comment. Only a matter of time.
He's already wearing purple clothes too...
“Some men just want to watch frozen pizza burn”
It’s called cocaine
@@LouSwole The Purple Messiah
Dave: "I don't bake"
Also Dave: Bakes a pizza every day.
He needs a pizza pizzazz
Putting a frozen pizza in the oven. Not baking.
he's losing his mind.....and I'm reaping all the benefits *jon lovitz voice*
My favorite scene in that movie.. lol
BEARDED LEGEND the coke is wearing off everybody knows the rules
Hilarious
Wedding Singer best quote of the movie lol
Someone send the “Purple Messiah” here a goddamn tripod so his phone isn’t falling over the whole time 😂
And a box cutter before he stabs himself
Just be thankful this one is in widescreen 🤣
Imagine buying a tripod for your phone
Keep this guy locked in his apartment. Best reviews in a long ass time. He should let the beard go too
manwell21 he can’t trim it himself. He pays somebody to do it
@@Anybodyelse2294 thank fuck. Duck Dynasty Dave Portnoy going through coke withdrawals is the end game. Hopefully he'll have a fort made out of card board boxes by then
Davey’s legit losing it day by day. This is gonna be made into a money how a multi-millionaire went crazy and documented it with pizza reviews
And then the IRS showed up to tax the gifts 🎁
One arched back, everyone knows we couldn’t see the “Positive Vibes Only”
Can we all take a moment to appreciate the perfect timing of Dave pretending to swing a bat and the camera falling over literally right after -8:31
One rambunctious 40 year old. Can't imagine what this guy was like as a kid when he didn't take his meds.
th-cam.com/video/Qyx641z2dxg/w-d-xo.html
You win the comments round for this video.
Yeah. He believe he’s a lot bigger then he is. Needs a reality check.
Adderall
Faster hands than Delino Deshields
one hurt back, everyone knows it's because he's been hunched over with a rolled up $100 bill
one “looks like muhtzuh” everyone knows Dave pretends he’s not a Jewy Jew
He doesn’t tip so yeah he’s definitely Jewy Jew
One bite everyone knows Pizza bagels are for Jews/Italians everyone knows Davey boy loves the NY St.Anthony pizza fest for the homeless.
California cant do pizza
@@ShallowwamYour people don't tip either but that is because they always Dine&Dash.
Progressive Guy my people? We own restaurants my G
I have never laughed so hard in my life.
When everything opens I'm going to miss this.
You missing this or what? Give me your life summed up in the last 4 years since the pandemic boi
Here post pandemic, and man, we didn’t know Dave was going to be the only consistent entertainment during such a crappy time.
“It’s so chewy”
Dave I can literally hear the crunch from here
Somebody mail him a tripod, everybody knows there’s 35% chance he’ll actually use it
Pres only cuts boxes towards his own body, everyone knows the rules
That's driving me fuckin nuts.
"Deceptively chewy" -California pizza kitchens new catch phrase
This lockdown reminded me Dave is still king of content.
Dave PLEASEEEE dont stop the package openings! Its the funniest part , not much to do these days and I look forward to watching this at bedtime, thanks for the giggles man!
he can't even cook a frozen pizza, and they thought he could bake cake LOOOOL im dying
One bite everyone knows Dave is baked on something else.
They figure if he's in quarantine long enough maybe he will give it a shot
hockeypromike11 dead rn
You make me laugh and smile everyday. Thanks so much! You are so entertaining! I absolutely love your pizza reviews and watching you open gifts.
“Lotta Mutzah”, everyone knows Dave is keeping kosher for Passover
Dude, you’ll never have to worry about food through all this. I’m waiting for the Totino’s pizza review
"Smelled Wood Fried Pizza." He's an idiot but it's kind of endearing sometimes.
The dyslexia is strong.
David,overall a nice guy,but arrogance comes through.
Get some wrapping tape and collapse the boxes,and clean up the apartment.
I think he does it on purpose to keep up with his image of literally giving so little fucks that he doesn’t even take the time to read a companies name before just rambling it incorrectly lol.
its actually "SMELTED".
Here in 2024 to check if the pizza from Lou Malnati's has finished cooking yet
One framed picture of Debbie, everyone knows Dave cried after this
El Pres is about to snap, everybody knows we’re going to see him on COPS later.
They're gonna be chasing a purple ford bronco.
One coke comedown, everyone knows Dave's a chaotic mess.
*Dave's parcels are multiplying like Covid-19 everybody knows the rules.*
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I dont know why he has to record himself eating dinner before the actual unboxing video
Dunno, but I like it
We're slowly watching a man's descension into madness
Dave’s coke guy finally came through, everyone knows the rules
Wife and i knew it from the first video. And what sealed the deal for me was when i found out he day trades. Them guys blow more then a hurricane.
ur videos are so relaxing to watch for some reason. You and running on empty food review are very chill for some reason
Jesus how much coke did he do before this
ealbertson318 yeah he’s off his chops here
All of it
Nuffin Duer you stole my comment 🤣
Lol ya hes tweakin hard i love when he starts opening the packages hes on one 4sure
Damn! I've been waiting for this review. This is my favorite frozen pizza by far. You gotta cook the pizza straight on the rack with no tray to get that nice crunchiness. Even says so on the instructions!
Amen! One of the best frozen pizzas. This review shocked me.
You're on the right track! I'd say it's in my top 4!
These are literally just unboxings with a little pizza review
These are following a persons decent into madness.
is this a problem?
Yet I'm completely cool with it.
Thank you Lotzza motzza for being so nice to our prez. Will def check it out.
portnoy is losing his god damn mind
If u were cooped up with an endless supply of pure cocaine... would you be doing any better?
Hey Davey why don't you get to the west coast and try pizza like Tucson Arizona Thanks
one address shown on video everybody knows that's why the presents are coming
The weasel did that shit on purpose absolutely.
The best way to do a CPK frozen pizza review is if you do their take and bake for $5. However you have to order an entree along with the take and bake.
One clip of pres throwing it back, everybody knows that a lot of moms are going to be sitting in puddles for Portnoy.
Props to whomever edited this. Fun time.
One time forgetting the word “tender” everyone knows the rules.
I love that he was overwhelmed with the packages, he had no idea what was coming
One purple blanket, everyone knows Dave isn’t getting any for a long time
“ this is so chewy”
Me: here’s him crunching on the pizza
I don’t think there’s a single episode where he almost drops the pizza off the board.
One bite everyone knows Dave is a pretty good athlete.
The adderall and Deathwish coffee are kickin in this pizza review.... Damn dude
one army bucket hat choking a millionaire, everyone knows the rules.
We need Dave to just open presents every show!!! This is amazing 😂😂
Can remember Diddy sending people to juniors but can't remember if Einstein did math 😂😂😂
This was by far the funniest fucking one of these videos.
Quarantined Dave is a fucking great character.
I felt like I was on some street grade NJ coke watching this pizza review
As someone who lives in California, People who say California doesn't know how to do Pizza, FAKE NEWS, California has some great Pizza spots, you don't have to be a rocket scientist to know how to make great Pizza, we have Brick Ovens, Stone Fire, and all the same Tools that East Coast Pizza has. A Great Oven, Freshly Rolled Dough, Homemade Sauce, Fresh Toppings, great Cheese Mix, and skilled Pizza Maker's, is all you really need, it's no big secret, I worked in the Pizza Industry in California for about 25 years, and we have some great Pizza, Dave needs to come out West.
11:09 Quarantine insanity phase one lol, hang in there bro
This has devolved from pizza reviews to the chronicles of one man's descent into madness.
Dave's swing knocked the camera right out the stadium
I always enjoy these reviews, but these have been fantastic.
Purple pants and purple sweater, Dave has officially gone insane.
Lol
Shhh just let him slowly come out of the closet. He's sensitive
Purple is the best color
One bite everyone knows purple is royalty.
This entire video is just a descent into madness.
And i love it.
Coffee and coke going into OT on this one. Everyone knows the rules.
Coronavirus can’t mess with BARSTOOL PIZZA REVIEWS BABY!!!!!
Yea the pizza was like, " this oven should be hot. " deceptively cold.
4:23
These 3 seconds are all you need to see.
10:43 One coke enraged Portnoy, everyone knows the rules.
Davey please bring Debbie into your quarantine shelter that be the funnest shit to watch!
Day 14 of quarantine and Dave has lost his mind completely, everyone knows the rules
these reviews are so good keep it up!
i love this covid break, it shows who really has talent are who hasnt! its so easy to see that those late night tv show host have zero talent.
"Muscles!!!!!!" Lmao 😭😭😭 07:41
One purple messiah everybody’s knows he’s coked out of his mind rn
Bru this guy took like 60mg of adderall and it starting hitting when he opened the packages.
8:25 Dave has officially lost his mind and the cameras had enough abuse
“Whoever did that is a psycho...unless that had anthrax on it” 😂😂😂
One “ooh”, everyone knows Dave hasn’t heard that in a while
“A lot of people said do this” “a lot of people said do that”..... every fuckin vid man
One purple jumpsuit, everyone knows pres is lost without Frankie dressing him
Been waiting for this one
The amount of cocaine he did before this is insane
Love this guy! Makes me laugh every time
One bite everybody knows Dave's brain is falling apart like wet cake.
Their barbecue chicken pizza is really good, especially when I throw some extra cheese on it.
"Tender" was the word you were looking for.
Ahhhh ♥️ !! I'm seriously living for these reviews & unboxings !!
One leaked address, everyone knows Andrews gonna have to move.
tiddystreamer69 what’s his address?
@@mistahj218 7:21
SixThirty that’s not his address it literally say Illinois and he’s not from Illinois
@@mistahj218 333 W 14th St APT 3 /// New York, NY 10014 // Theres a bunch of screenshots available in the vid.
@@mistahj218 333 W 14th St APT 3 /// New York, NY 10014 // Theres a bunch of screenshots available in the vid.
Dude this is your funniest one yet!
I love watching Dave grow. He used the peel, the cutter, and managed to make 4 semi-equal triangles. I see you prez!
Do you do anything but cheese pizza? Cause Dijorno does a thin crust Philly cheese steak pizza that i was super impressed with.
“I don’t bake”
No shit. Pres doesn’t even know how to preheat the oven
I died when he said "AND A HOCKEY PUCK."
One millionaire, everyone knows most of that money is spent on Coke
Memes aside, this pandemic changed the best pizza reviews to the best descent into madness documentary ever made. And I'm fucking loving every second of it.