There were at least two things you did right: 1. Leave the UK 2. Get out of that situation alive and live and learn from your experience. What a catalogue of errors, with all the signs on the wall that you couldn't see because of wanting, albeit not consciously, to live a fantasy. It all sounds like confessions of a fool with more money than sense, but by sharing this video you might prevent some other blind idiots from falling for the same scam. Divoced men with good financials are the prime target for any "love hook" scam, among other things. This can happen anywhere in the world, part particularly in large cities where many people are driven by money. In a poor country like Thailand, there will be even more people from poor backgrounds that try to find a way out of poverty. The mass tourism, which includes "sex tourism" (I know you didn't go there for that) will attract both types to "the party" - those vulnerable to (sometimes driven by) various desires and those willing to fulfill them for a PRICE and then back out of "the deal", but with all the benefits on their side! The bit about her having cancer and then you wait outside while she goes into the hospital, that is clear as day the sign that it was a lie. The Internet is plagued by websites to tempt men and women into situations that then go badly wrong. In this case, you managed to do it live and direct while trying to make a new start in life. Fortunately, you seem to have broad shoulders and are now able to reflect on it and put it all behind you. You sound like an overly trusting person, gullible even, so take your time and don't assume others will see things or do things as you would. If you've suffered depression, then you should be working on yourself first. Get to the bottom of your issues and transform yourself. Leave the temptations to massage your ego, it will always lead to pain, shame, etc. If you don't really know yourself, or at least be working towards it, then how can you really expect to find love and happiness with another, especially when you don't know anything about them and you're in another country and there are huge language and culture differences. Take your time to get to know a person in real life, not in bars and clubs. Don't fall for the emotional or other "good time" triggers without finding out what's real first. Look at yourself hard, but also give yourself a chance and be positive not needy.
Thoroughly enjoyed reading your comment and I agree with all you said. I think the moral of this story was that at the time I was vulnerable and despite I didn't come out here looking for a relationship due to the fact that I was shown some attention it cascaded into a windfall of pain. And yes you are right looking at yourself is far more important than looking at what others think. But thankfully every cloud has a silver lining and now I'm extremely happily married with a fantastic wife and someone that actually wants to be with me for me rather than for what I can give. Thank you again for your comment
@@Buzzinpattaya I edited it a few times, as I felt I was being a bit harsh at first, so hopefully it didn't come across like that in the end. I did see some stupid and negative comments, so that prompted me to write something a bit more balanced. I meant to add that being in Thaliand, you have easy access to some very good places where they either teach or practise such things as meditation, Tai Chi and Tai Yoga Massage - any of which, or all for that matter, would be tremendously beneficial to you. If you have the time and money to do such things, then in Thailand you will find very good teachers and schools - obviously there'll be a few charlatans too, so do your due diligence first. Good luck and enjoy wonderful Thaliand, which is one of my places to visit. I actually have a granddaughter whose mother is Thai, so I'm sure I'll go there one day.
So many guys who come to live in Pattaya.....who were married, now divorced, with kids now grown up.....think they are gonna be that guy they were before being married.....but that guy is long dead and they revert back to what they know: marriage and kids. And the cycle begins again. Plus, the majority of guys CANNOT live alone. They confuse boredom with loneliness. Big mistake.
It puzzles me why bar girls are even the first thought. It shows the character of the man, no?. Can easily meet professional corporate / government workers in the malls, shops, restaurants. Its called - making an effort.
I remember I went to Phuket with the wife in the early 90s on two weeks holiday, after a week it was changeover day and the lads from Manchester probably early 30s were saying goodbye to their Thai girlfriends there was hugs, kissed, crying, the girls were crying the lads were crying the girls were on their knees pulling at their hair distraught, the lads were promising to keep in touch, come back, send money, it was all very distressing, that was about 5pm, we went out for dinner about 9.30 pm and those girls were in the restaurant with the new arrivals that had come on the plain the Manc lads were going home on, not a care in the world, laughing, kissing, flirting, happy as and I just thought about the Manc lads, on the plain still, all miserable and making plans for their future with the Thai girls......
@@paulwally9007 no way! It's amusement for the locals an ex-pats... nothing funnier than watching the boys drinking the sugar water! Wakey wakey, love is a business in some towns eh
There are very few 20 minute TH-cam videos that keep my attention. A human story from someone with nothing to prove, but a great deal of valuable experience - thanks for sharing.
I went through all that crap 20 years ago! She moved her family into the house I had bought. She 'disappeared' somewhere with 'her car' ! I took the 2 very young kids with me to a small rental house in town. As I was working I hired a maid. Engaged a lawyer, he was fantastic. I took her to court for divorce and custody of kids, and division of estate. All went well, Thai court were excellent! I paid her out a bit, kept the kids and got the house back after about 1 year! House was 'gutted' all furniture taken by family, but eventually it all came back together! She never contacted the kids for 7 years! Kids are now through University, well educated and working. The days of living on 'Elm Street' are lone gone! So don't worry--over time it all comes good! *I'll never ever get involved again! ** Pay for play and 'walk away'. Good honest report Trevor! Well done!
When I first came, here a good older friend of mine who had been round the block said to me "They are born lying, don't trust or believe anything they say. Pay them to leave the next morning it's the only way." That advice has stood me in good stead for 7+ years now.
Trev my heart goes out to you mate I’ve been battling cancer since I was 30 and now 38 . I’ve had my teeth and tongue removed at such a young age and I can’t believe how someone could lie about such a thing !!! Thai people just love money and it always happens to nice guys . Stay strong mate and can’t wait to visit Thailand 🙏
So sorry to hear that Iam sixty and by the grace of God have not faced cancer yet it's the one that needs to be defeated sooner than later all the best in the future mate
Trev, you're one keep it real/ straight shooter! I appreciate you so much. I don't know if you actually realize how much you help us total newbies. It's a lot! This video has a lot of views and comments, so it was of interest and of value to many!
Unfortunately as an Austrian guy I'm not able to follow you in every talk of you because of your quick and special "dialect", but this video was very emotional for me. Its a fact, coming to Thailand it is very easy to fall in love, belonging to me this happens within just 2 or 3 days... Until now I didn't loose some money, thanks God. On the other hand I met a lot of expat married for many years with a Thai lady and they are very happy.. It can be good or bad everywhere in the world. But many thanks for giving this deep inside in one part of your life and as you mentioned very often, it was also a nice phase of live too....
No mate, you're spot on. It's not as easy as it may sound to just walk away from things like that. But on the bright side, you came out the other side happier and stronger. All the best to you, mate. People like her will get their comeuppance one day.
Good of you to be so honest, telling your story even though it shows you to be naive, but to warn other men. That takes balls. Kudos to you. Mind you, I'm not sure this story is exclusive to Thai women. The story could be in any country. 😉
Yes it happened to me Thai dr Philippines it’s a sad deal we are only a atm for there family enjoy while it last rent don’t buy they still get a lot for nothing in the end
Wow, what a great story. Very honest and not expected from the usual content. You always seem to be afraid about going out of your comfort zone, but I think you should trust your instincts because that is where your content seems to be your best. Just my opinion. This personal story is much appreciated. Thank you for sharing.
Respect for telling your story Trevor....I just got away from an Ex Gogo (38 years old) a real expert! ..She was playing the long game, eyeing up all the assets, condo (although it was 100% Foreign Freehold, best move ever)..It's taken a lot of effort to walk away as she was incredibly sexy and fun but dangerous. I had to totally block all contact and never look back, saying nothing . It still hurts ,but I know I did the right thing and consider myself V lucky. I listened to my gut and instinct at the time. I would have lost a lot more if not the lot and then just been replaced eventually, I am 100% sure of that.
Thank you too for sharing what I can imagine is a very painful experience you're going through and yes it's very hard to walk away when emotions are involved
The best lessons come from the most painful experiences! And you've learned, grown and matured from those difficult endeavors.. Most importantly, you are resilient and able to bounce back and recover fairly quickly, with minimal damage and a good attitude. We, (you, me and everyone) really lose when we cant trust again or have bitterness, anger or resentment. Good job, great attitude and good luck, sir.
Waaaw....A real life experience presented in a way that most reasonable people would understand and appreciate that at the very least "the journey and experiences of life" sometimes take us to places and situations that we never ever imagined. Thanks for sharing. It's stories like this that help make the "road" a bit easier to travel for some of us no matter where we go or find ourselves. Live long, live happy, live healthy and keep doing what you do. Cheers.
Good on you for making such an excellent effort to explain your honest and heartfelt experiences, in order to help others. Very happy that things turned out so well in your life. All the best.
Thanks Trev Just been through it. 4 years then the silent treatment overnight. Lost so much because it’s not worth trying to fight for it. Killed my dream, but hopefully rebuild 🙏
@@darrenjones3118 simply saying you made a mistake and to learn from it and not do it again. Rent everything never buy no matter what a Thai woman tells you or how much she”loves” you.
The problem is Im an obese bald headed 65 year old but in my minds eye I am still as handsome as I was in my youth. How on earth could that beautiful 25 year old Thai girl resist me. It is pure narcissism on my part...the most attractive part of me is my bank balance and the fact that should I marry a thai girl she wont have too long to wait to inherit my hard earned
Trev, your courage is apparent in your vulnerability. To take responsibility and ownership for your mistakes because you were unaware, uneducated in Thai ways and having a big heart and a generous soul is not a bad personality characteristic...it was a life lesson. I did much research on Thai culture and Thai women before relocating to Thailand. I came looking for love and a long-term relationship. I still made many mistakes, nothing catastrophic but certainly those that created a need for adjustments in my perspective and expectations. I came in search of the simple and natural Thai lady from the farming community in the North. We enjoy both worlds, rural and natural farming but also time in Pattaya golfing and Island hopping. After 18 months in Thailand and learning so much... sitting and enjoying a cold Leo on the beach in the early evening in Koh Samui with my Sweetheart I couldn't help but think and say..."This is the life, this is so nice, what a beautiful place, what a beautiful country....thank you Love." We all create our own destiny via our own choices...there are always mistakes. Don't worry about being right all the time, instead try to be wrong less and be grateful for all you have experienced in this wonderful life. My advice, go slow, a little at a time. It is all one big gift...give more than you take. Cheers!
@Chris Small, ...wow!! First time I read such a intelligent, and very good understanding, .. i guess your a man with loads of life experience, and a deep understanding and writing it. You must have studied psychology, or are a very talented high EQ person,.... I humbly say,... I love meeting people wise as you,... And only listen. I've nothing even close, to add after reading this. I'm not being sarcastic !!! I'm not easy sucking up like this,... But i just needed to react to someone's by coincidence, reading another reply... Your amazing!! I'm no idiot, but reading this!...i still have much to learn. 👍 ✌️
@@Buzzinpattaya I know many men here in the US that make much less than their wives. I know one guy who is a contractor who has never made more than $40k a year. His wife is a nurse practitioner that makes $150k a year plus has the health insurance through her employer. He gets drunk everyday. She never stops bitching but won’t leave. It’s not always the man who taken advantage of.
Hi Trevor, that cancer lie from your ex filled me up with rage. I lost both my sons aged 23 and 29 to cancer two decades back and I can completely relate how you must have felt. Though you’re laughing it off, losing it all isn’t a big joke. I’m so glad that you’re doing well with your present wife and life in Thailand. May it remain like that forever, best wishes.
I can't imagine how losing your son's must have been, catastrophic at best....so sorry to read this mate, genuinely sending you my best wishes to you...... Fuck that's so hard to get my head around your loss!!!!!!
Yes I lost my father and my older brother to cancer. The only positive thing that I could take away from it was that neither one of them suffered for long. It was fast and they both passed away at home with family around them. Cancer still sucks. I can’t imagine losing two children.
I am very sorry to hear about your son's 😭 my wife was diagnosed with Stage 4 lung cancer on the 19 August, it's spread to her spine and she is now suffering from a fractured spine. I am taking my darling home to The Phillipines in January
What a great story, I can’t thank you enough. I lost my wife after a 42 year relationship, 8 years ago. I am very vulnerable, & this could happen to me. I have tried to get a lady to spend sometime with me. The chat is always questions about my finances, how much is my house worth, what pensions do I receive, what’s my Company worth? I never wanted to be on my own, man shouldn’t live on his own, two heads are better than one, aren’t they? Happy New Year to you.
Very brave to share your storey Trevor. We all can get drawn into the lies over here. For my part having had 4 failed relationships where I sponsored a girl whilst still working and going backwards and forwards, I was about to give up on Thai women. Thats until I met my wife who was 19 and a gogo dancer. 11 years later we are now fully together and married for 8 years. These relationships do work but you just need to find the right one. By the way I am 35 years older than her.
I experienced worst in the states my friend. Looks snd money makes no difference. Your personality is a blast of energy people are drawn towards truth and honesty. Fun is the name of the game keep having fun in the end we are all buried alone with no money.
Not your girl, it's just your turn. Even if you really like her, just compliment her and let her go. That's all you can ask for. Just be a slag and get in and out. That's life.
Huge respect to you mate, you are the better person for accepting the situation and moving on, which is never easy, take care and stay happy and healthy.
That`s very true. Love is an form of madness and once you are fully consumed in it (epescially with an beautiful, hot thai lady) it is bloody difficult to walk away. I`ve been in the same situation as well, and i know how it feels.
Same thing happened to me dealing with a Thai woman. Bought a house and was planning to retire. Ended up having to walk away from a newly built house. Thai ppl in tourist areas learn very easy to take advantage of foreigners. I was giving this woman money every month and she still insisted on staying in the club. Maintaining her self image in front of other aided in her downfall. Sad part was learning her parents and family whom I helped quite a bit were in on the scam to hide her real intentions. the end, she lost everything b/c she was never taught money management nor how to run a businesses. Great life lesson learned. I regrouped and got back on my feet. In the end I learned foreigners are mostly looked at as check books to Thai women.
As an expat woman who worked and lived in China, Viet Nam, Thailand, Japan, South Korea, Tanzania, Iraq, and India yes! Foreign poor women look at male expats as ATMs. They think nothing of marrying one and divorcing because to those women it is a BUSINESS transaction. The expat men (I'm talking about regular guys here, not sexpats) are absolutely crushed and blindsided as they were truly in love with the carefully cultivated facade presented by the demon female. Beware expat men!!!!!!
An honest story .I can not point the finger as a similar thing happened to me.The house was not B3.7M but B1.4 M but with improvements and money spent on furniture it probably came to B 2M .We lived there 10 years up in Chiang mai .At least i got 10 years where i was rent free and when we sold she did give me B300k . Met her in Pattaya .She had a hair Salon off Soi Bukhao .The shop was flooded out at the time with 50 cm of water .She lived in the back room and her bed was swimming in water.We hit it off.I felt sorry for her and let her stay with me at my tiny Condo in Jomtien.The rest is history and it did work out and i was happy enough for 9 years at least ,until it went pear shaped mainly due to my lack of money .
Silent treatment such a classic. My two experiences with this ... 1. British wife. She could freeze me out all day then her mobile would ring and the smile would come on and the lively tone of voice! Then back to glum the minute her call ended. Such an operator. 2. A Kenyan g/f, we had a fantastic couple of visits then on the 2nd one we were driving back to the airport and she went silent on me for 3 hours. We got to the airport and as we bid farewell she asked me to leave her with $100, well I gave her a $50 note and told her we will never meet again but that it had all been great until a few hours ago - adding that a woman who does silent treatment even before a ring goes on is simply a no-no. Imagine life 5 years down the line. I went into the airport to check in, had a few Tuskers and laughed all the way home about the dodged bullet.
I had a similar experience with a Kenyan lady here in the UK. However the silent treatment always lasted 5 days as a minimum. Any way we tried to patch things up by selling my Luxury flat and buying a house together and as I had just been made redundant from the Oil Industry but had a fair bit of cash, I paid 60% cash and she took a mortgage in her name for the 40% balance. Anyway after 5 years it all went sour and she took my house keys away and made me homeless. That was nearly 2 years ago, still fighting using Lawyers, she has the house and I am in a private let, paying someone else,s mortgage
Thai's plan far ahead. I know a Thai lady that came to Australia and married a local guy. She sent his money 'home' for years to build a house in her village. She was working in my restaurant and she was telling me that she was just about ready to return to Thailand, and her Thai husband, as the house was now finished. 😁
Fair play to you sharing your story and you're so humble and honest about it too. Hopefully it can help someone else avoid being swindled. I'm impressed you're so cheerful and positive, and I wish you all the best for 2023
@@Buzzinpattaya honestly, I think you're stronger than me, if what happened to you had happened to me I'm not sure I'd have coped. So your fortitude impresses me. Been 6 years since I was last in Thailand, now that things are opening up after Covid I'll have to take a trip there again.
You lost the girl but got to keep your dogs, that's a good trade in my opinion. You'll get far more loyalty from a dog than you'll ever get from a woman!
Happened to an older friend of mine, he gave her and her family 100 of thousands of dollars, married her so she can get the visa ofcoarse and come to LA. Lets just say she has a house now and he lives in san bernadino. All they care about is the money and money to they family, you cant buy a girl no matter how lonely you get, and we all get lonely at times even with a wife laying next to you
wow Trevor, really enjoyed this vid. its a part of life that lots of us experience but never talk about. never thought that i would sit for 20 mins listening to someone just talking. thank you
I lived in Thailand for three years back in the early 2000s .. I was working for an international company, got transferred there and everything this guy says happens to EVERY Farang who lives there!! The only difference is 90% wont ever admit it publicly.
Had a mate that went to Vegas,he says….brought a hooker to his room..Big mistake,she drugged him with Mescalin, and kept on topping him up over a week, and took £19,200 off his credit card…he tried to sue the hotel,and they just laughed in his face.So it can always be worse!!!!
Fair enough, and well spoken mate. As an Expat American living in Vietnam for the past 10 years, your experiences are ringing true and very similar to my own. You don’t expect to fall in love but when it happens and they break your heart in half it hurts. However, from that disappointment, I have achieved a meaningful, rewarding, loving relationship for the past eight years with a sweet, honest, funny Vietnamese woman that I truly love. Life is too short to be bitter, and sometimes out of the trash heap of one relationship real happiness can be found. Love you brother for sharing your story.☮️
I have lived in Pattaya for many years.....no comment. It is a syndrome called "Cherry Boy Thailand". I have seen it scores of time. First time away from home. Divorced. You are prime bait.
Learning to be by yourself is a great benefit ,especially in Pattaya. I can go out and have my fun (outside my hotel). Come home to my hotel sanctuary with no issues.I would hear screaming matches at night,doors slamming and guys being given hell. I wouldn't start a business with a beautiful stranger. I buy no meals or drinks for strange women whose friends want to rort me. I never have an issue, I never get involved in dramas. Fly low and alone.
Middle aged men are vulnerable to pretty and calculating women especially when bereaved or divorced. I do not sneer or laugh at you I'm very glad your life is on track,but there were a number of red flags in plain sight! I'm a man of 67 years of age and I don't look bad for my age. I also know a woman twenty five or thirty years of age would be interested in me for money not looks! If men go into this situation in Thailand,Philippines or Vietnam. Be careful. The attention of beautiful women is hard to resist,but be realistic. You are a lucky man to have found happiness. I lost my wife a year ago after twenty happy years she was kind generous and caring I miss her every day,but I will probably live my final day's as a widower. Your story is a very cautionary tale.
People shouldn’t be leaving nasty comments. Women like her are predators. No excuse for that behaviour some men have committed suicide over things like this. It’s very serious & I feel for u. You was vulnerable & she prayed on that x I wish u all the best x
Happened to me in thailand to, getting scammed big time by an bar girl who was an predator also. So, i can relate for sure. Fantastic, to see you doing great now :)
Good on you for being candid with us mate. It's always the sign of a fully rounded human being when U can share things that went wrong and have a chuckle about it. I reckon 'Private Dancer' should be mandatory in-flight reading for anyone heading to the LOS...
My inxperienced middle aged Mama's Boy brother in law married a mid 30s Thai. Brought her back to Europe. She's a glorified unhappy housecat. I did my best to help him see the light. Never works.
😅🤣😂 inexperienced middle aged mummy's boy 😆😆 the type who wants to be grown up but can't really manage without mummy? And mummy won't let go so no ones good enough for him? That's why shes unhappy.....not because she's Thai
That happen everywhere in the world with any woman…that said, full respect to you. I married a Thai bar girl 30 years ago. She gave me two lovely children and we all still are so happy in our lives….but that happen everywhere in the world with any woman..That said the guy who enter the tiger cage should know he courbe be eaten…
Thank you for sharing your story. I've met many men in Thailand with the same story, it is more common than you think. I had a Thai girlfriend for over a year, and several other short term Thai relationships. I've definately learned a lot. There's a HUGE range of situations. I've had girls I pay a monthly stipend to (which goes to help support their family), to girls who never ask for money, pay for our dinners and taxis, just want my baby, etc. I've never lived with a Thai girl though... Culturally there's a big difference than the west. They deeply believe in "being lucky", and live day to day, but lack empathy. Everything is opposite from the west. In America, children get an allowance from their parents, money flows down. In Thailand, money flows from the children up, to the parents, brothers, grandparents, etc. Thai women are head of household, so Thai men ask their younger female family members for money. After my experiences, I would never, ever buy a house with a Thai women! That is considered a gift to her; you have no rights to it. Own your own condo, so if things go south, she must leave. I even dated a Thai girl who owns a house purchased by her ex foreign boyfriend! It's just wild, but extremely common. When you fall in love, it's easy to want to support them and at the time it doesn't seem like that much money, but you just have to be careful.
A lot of men here have told me their stories like this. I’m here 13 years my good friend who’s Thai she warned me b4 I retired here what not to do or who to trust.
Anybody that's been in any relationship should know that when one person loses interest in sex it's because they are cheating or have someone else in mind.
To be honest Trev, this isn’t necessarily just in Thailand! I had something very similar over here in the UK with my Italian ex. We all live and learn….
Don't be silly. You pay for short term fun if you are into that scene..long term is a recipe for disaster for your savings. Remember fellas renting is cheaper then buying.
I have been to pattaya 25+ times and had my best fun there but it’s like going to the zoo. Enjoy the monkeys but don’t take one home when you leave the zoo.
Good Honest Story Mate, You'll Never Get To The Bottom of Them, Strange Breed, The Sad Thing is You Take Them Out of Poverty, Give Them A Bloody Good Life Style, And This How You Get Repaid, They Don't Deserve Us, Sometimes it's Better to Leave Them Picking Rice, Although it's Against Our Better Nature, At Least The Dog, Bless it's Heart Stood by You, Your Best Friend 👌
In Hindi they say “you can’t keep a snake” No matter how well you treat it, it will one day bite you. It’s a shame as there may be good Thai women but it’s generally better to to rent then bin them.
1: Never buy a house in Thailand because that will always be in someone else's name, instead buy a condo in your name. 2: You can own the car in your name.
Thanks for sharing your story, absolutely astonishing….proves the old saying what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Glad you finally found happiness. Best wishes for the future mate 👍
Sounds like every relationship/marriage I ve ever had , here in California. No Different. Pattaya, Los Angeles, all the same. But Great Video, and thanks for your expertise and hard work. hehehe
I had something worse my Thai girl and her father hired two guys to kill me as soon as they drained me of 500k they got ever kind of accident and life insurance on me soon as my baby came out two weeks later I’m dead 13 min I was stupid went back after learning to walk again to being shot at and finally shot in my arm smoking would been a heart shot of not smoking I can’t believe how and what they willing to do to take our money
Don't you just love all these keyboard experts! Most probably have never even been to Thailand.....okay so I'm wrong they went to Koh Samui once on a 8 day package tour....sorry. Your relationship went great for some time but not only was she a bargirl, she was 20 years younger and in her 20s. Hindsight is a great thing, I've never hooked up with any of them. I've been coming to Thailand since 1995 with a number of years where I didn't come at all. I've noticed great changes in the country over that time but bar girls never change. My interest was more in laid back islands and getting as far away from western tourists as possible, I loved the place. Last year after several visits over the years I came to Chiang Mai for a couple of months, I have friends there with common interests. Out of that I met a nurse who is 50 years old. We get on fine, I've witnessed her working most days she works hard, I've met her family and spent a lot of time with her as I have been back for months over the last 12. Like you I never saw it coming, out of all the time I had spent in Thailand over so many years I never once considered a Thai woman for a girlfriend. It just never occurred to me as I was working, couldn't live in Thailand then and didn't consider bring one home. I didn't like the expat or tourist bar scene, I didn't like the idea of going with woman I never knew. That's just me. I never came to Thailand to meet woman nor find a wife. When I met this woman and started seeing her it came at a surprise, once I got to know her I found her to be similar to me in our needs and ways. I'm living there now with her. Where that goes who knows as its the future, but I've told her that I'm poor by western standards, I never speak of my financial position other than that. She's seen me live and spend frugally. I tell her I can't pay her way that she needs to work but maybe not so hard. She is happy with that. She could come and live in my country and easily find work, I've told her if we did that she's going to have to sign a pre nuptial and she's okay with that. I'd never buy a house in Thailand, why I have one in my country that pays enough rent to me to pay rent and food in Thailand. I think you have to be sensible and be ready to bail out if they put pressure on you to buy things like houses and pay for the family. I'll also add I've been single for years and was happy with that and am happy by myself so I don't need someone. Why I'm saying all of this is that I totally understand that a guy can come to Thailand with no interest in the girls. I've been accused of not only being a sex tourist at times but into ladyboys and even underage girls. Some people because of their own thinking believe if you're a man and you go to Thailand you're either into the sex scene or you're a liar. For those who think otherwise to me guess what, it may come to a surprise to you that there are other things in life other than sex and beer.
@@wintersun398 yes, it was the long game and in reflection its all obvious. Living in my car. Cant go home as she took out a vexatious AVO with police charge of "threat to kill". So shes in the house im out in my car... and they will side with the 'victim' just in case, every time. When it goes to court the judge will protect the girl despite absolutely zero evidence. Just her... pointing a finger. I have a theory though.... 'every day above ground is a good day' so i am having a good day. Also crypto is a divorcing mans best friend.
Yep. Happened to a friend of mine with a Japanese female. I'm a lady so I won't dignify that female by referring to her as a lady. He was in his 20's and so was she. She stayed with him just long enough to get the green card and spousal support!!!! 😠
I don’t think the guy can be called stupid. Some women are experts in being sweet to a man in order to extract from him. The mistake He made was taking her from a low Financial status to independent business owner and she no Longer needed the man! This to Me is typical behaviour all Women from all nationalities can be capable of.
Alright, let's just get one thing straight here, in Europe, you can get an "escort", and they are many thousands of dollars a month, after all, it's not common for a guy in his 40''s to have a very beautiful girlfriend in her 20's, so, you GOT that for many months. In the United States, had you married someone, bought a house, bought a car, opened a business and then she says goodbye, well, half that is hers. How many men lost their house and car? MILLIONS. So, your story is not uncommon in the male/female relationship world, women cost a LOT OF MONEY, what you paid for the house is less than what some pay for the divorce attorney. So, don't look at it like you got ripped off, you paid a young woman for sex for a while.
English ladies can be just as bad, during lockdown I met Debbie from Doncaster on elite , like this chap , I fell hook line sinker for her charms , she turned out to be a complete fraud, lazy / moody and a bad history of cheating in her previous relationship. You never know what the hell you are getting with women of today.
@@Buzzinpattaya for sure. Apparently there is the 3 day rule.. But as for your story I don't think you can call it you lost everything to a thai girl as from what you said she didn't scam you at all apart from the sick story but likely only to make you stay otherwise why would she say it . It would be different if she made it up and was getting you to give her a load of money ans buy things for her to get treatment but that's not how the story went so I don't see how she did too much wrong but more it didn't work out and the point is more be more careful about thinking its the one and forever and investing everything into cars and houses
There were at least two things you did right:
1. Leave the UK
2. Get out of that situation alive and live and learn from your experience.
What a catalogue of errors, with all the signs on the wall that you couldn't see because of wanting, albeit not consciously, to live a fantasy. It all sounds like confessions of a fool with more money than sense, but by sharing this video you might prevent some other blind idiots from falling for the same scam. Divoced men with good financials are the prime target for any "love hook" scam, among other things. This can happen anywhere in the world, part particularly in large cities where many people are driven by money. In a poor country like Thailand, there will be even more people from poor backgrounds that try to find a way out of poverty. The mass tourism, which includes "sex tourism" (I know you didn't go there for that) will attract both types to "the party" - those vulnerable to (sometimes driven by) various desires and those willing to fulfill them for a PRICE and then back out of "the deal", but with all the benefits on their side!
The bit about her having cancer and then you wait outside while she goes into the hospital, that is clear as day the sign that it was a lie.
The Internet is plagued by websites to tempt men and women into situations that then go badly wrong. In this case, you managed to do it live and direct while trying to make a new start in life. Fortunately, you seem to have broad shoulders and are now able to reflect on it and put it all behind you. You sound like an overly trusting person, gullible even, so take your time and don't assume others will see things or do things as you would.
If you've suffered depression, then you should be working on yourself first. Get to the bottom of your issues and transform yourself. Leave the temptations to massage your ego, it will always lead to pain, shame, etc. If you don't really know yourself, or at least be working towards it, then how can you really expect to find love and happiness with another, especially when you don't know anything about them and you're in another country and there are huge language and culture differences. Take your time to get to know a person in real life, not in bars and clubs. Don't fall for the emotional or other "good time" triggers without finding out what's real first. Look at yourself hard, but also give yourself a chance and be positive not needy.
Thoroughly enjoyed reading your comment and I agree with all you said. I think the moral of this story was that at the time I was vulnerable and despite I didn't come out here looking for a relationship due to the fact that I was shown some attention it cascaded into a windfall of pain. And yes you are right looking at yourself is far more important than looking at what others think.
But thankfully every cloud has a silver lining and now I'm extremely happily married with a fantastic wife and someone that actually wants to be with me for me rather than for what I can give.
Thank you again for your comment
@@Buzzinpattaya I edited it a few times, as I felt I was being a bit harsh at first, so hopefully it didn't come across like that in the end. I did see some stupid and negative comments, so that prompted me to write something a bit more balanced.
I meant to add that being in Thaliand, you have easy access to some very good places where they either teach or practise such things as meditation, Tai Chi and Tai Yoga Massage - any of which, or all for that matter, would be tremendously beneficial to you. If you have the time and money to do such things, then in Thailand you will find very good teachers and schools - obviously there'll be a few charlatans too, so do your due diligence first. Good luck and enjoy wonderful Thaliand, which is one of my places to visit. I actually have a granddaughter whose mother is Thai, so I'm sure I'll go there one day.
Great advice and insight.
Leave the UK are you from there ?
@@mall231 yep, born and bred, as they say
So many guys who come to live in Pattaya.....who were married, now divorced, with kids now grown up.....think they are gonna be that guy they were before being married.....but that guy is long dead and they revert back to what they know: marriage and kids. And the cycle begins again. Plus, the majority of guys CANNOT live alone. They confuse boredom with loneliness. Big mistake.
Indeed mate
That’s a very good observation, well done alone does not mean lonely 👍
So fuckin true dude
'They confuse boredom with loneliness'. Spot on.
It puzzles me why bar girls are even the first thought. It shows the character of the man, no?. Can easily meet professional corporate / government workers in the malls, shops, restaurants. Its called - making an effort.
I remember I went to Phuket with the wife in the early 90s on two weeks holiday, after a week it was changeover day and the lads from Manchester probably early 30s were saying goodbye to their Thai girlfriends there was hugs, kissed, crying, the girls were crying the lads were crying the girls were on their knees pulling at their hair distraught, the lads were promising to keep in touch, come back, send money, it was all very distressing, that was about 5pm, we went out for dinner about 9.30 pm and those girls were in the restaurant with the new arrivals that had come on the plain the Manc lads were going home on, not a care in the world, laughing, kissing, flirting, happy as and I just thought about the Manc lads, on the plain still, all miserable and making plans for their future with the Thai girls......
Hahaha brilliant mate
Lol, i watch a "so called" mate get caught like this, he put thousands into it too! Multiple times to different whores too lol...
This story should be written on every visa issued for Thailand.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I've witnessed that in the DR.
@@paulwally9007 no way! It's amusement for the locals an ex-pats... nothing funnier than watching the boys drinking the sugar water!
Wakey wakey, love is a business in some towns eh
“A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.” 🐕 Thanks Trevor for sharing your experience. ❤👍
And if you don't feed it then it will leave too.
@@sassasins031 100% right .. Always remember the 3 ''F'' rule to keep your girl .. F**k, Feed and Finance.
I love my two dogs
There are very few 20 minute TH-cam videos that keep my attention. A human story from someone with nothing to prove, but a great deal of valuable experience - thanks for sharing.
Just sharing what happened to me mate, cheers
I went through all that crap 20 years ago! She moved her family into the house I had bought. She 'disappeared' somewhere with 'her car' ! I took the 2 very young kids with me to a small rental house in town. As I was working I hired a maid. Engaged a lawyer, he was fantastic. I took her to court for divorce and custody of kids, and division of estate. All went well, Thai court were excellent! I paid her out a bit, kept the kids and got the house back after about 1 year! House was 'gutted' all furniture taken by family, but eventually it all came back together! She never contacted the kids for 7 years! Kids are now through University, well educated and working. The days of living on 'Elm Street' are lone gone! So don't worry--over time it all comes good! *I'll never ever get involved again! ** Pay for play and 'walk away'. Good honest report Trevor! Well done!
Pay for pleasure Na !
A sorry story that is not rare.
They a wired to fk you over.
Definitely do not marry!!
same here mate never again
Most of people would not talk about their bad experience , i admire your courage .
Just thought if nothing else it would show how it happens
When I first came, here a good older friend of mine who had been round the block said to me "They are born lying, don't trust or believe anything they say. Pay them to leave the next morning it's the only way."
That advice has stood me in good stead for 7+ years now.
Gotcha mate
Fell for the first woman I met in Thailand!!!!-19 years later we're still together, she's ace & Burmese
wow nice one mate fair play to you
Trev my heart goes out to you mate
I’ve been battling cancer since I was 30 and now 38 . I’ve had my teeth and tongue removed at such a young age and I can’t believe how someone could lie about such a thing !!! Thai people just love money and it always happens to nice guys . Stay strong mate and can’t wait to visit Thailand 🙏
I'm not quite sure how to respond to you other than saying I wish that you make a full and speedy recovery and everything's okay mate..... Stay strong
So sorry to hear that Iam sixty and by the grace of God have not faced cancer yet it's the one that needs to be defeated sooner than later all the best in the future mate
Big respect for telling us your story. This is great. Looks like in the end everything went very well for you.
Yes, thank you
Trev, you're one keep it real/ straight shooter! I appreciate you so much. I don't know if you actually realize how much you help us total newbies. It's a lot!
This video has a lot of views and comments, so it was of interest and of value to many!
Thanks mate much appreciated
Unfortunately as an Austrian guy I'm not able to follow you in every talk of you because of your quick and special "dialect", but this video was very emotional for me. Its a fact, coming to Thailand it is very easy to fall in love, belonging to me this happens within
just 2 or 3 days...
Until now I didn't loose some money, thanks God.
On the other hand I met a lot of expat married for many years with a Thai lady and they are very happy..
It can be good or bad everywhere in the world. But many thanks for giving this deep inside in one part of your life and as you mentioned very often, it was also a nice phase of live too....
Gotcha mate and yes you can find happiness here for sure, just take it day by day
No mate, you're spot on. It's not as easy as it may sound to just walk away from things like that. But on the bright side, you came out the other side happier and stronger. All the best to you, mate. People like her will get their comeuppance one day.
Thanks mate and yeah it happens
Good of you to be so honest, telling your story even though it shows you to be naive, but to warn other men. That takes balls. Kudos to you.
Mind you, I'm not sure this story is exclusive to Thai women. The story could be in any country. 😉
Yeah I was dumb but we emotions are involved it's easy to lose reality
@@Buzzinpattaya true mt
It COULD be in any country -if you're unlucky. But in Thailand it's practically an industry.
Yes it happened to me Thai dr Philippines it’s a sad deal we are only a atm for there family enjoy while it last rent don’t buy they still get a lot for nothing in the end
Wow, what a great story. Very honest and not expected from the usual content. You always seem to be afraid about going out of your comfort zone, but I think you should trust your instincts because that is where your content seems to be your best. Just my opinion. This personal story is much appreciated. Thank you for sharing.
Your welcome
A fool and his money are easily parted.
An old fool and his money are parted even faster.
lol
There's no fool like an old fool
Respect for telling your story Trevor....I just got away from an Ex Gogo (38 years old) a real expert! ..She was playing the long game, eyeing up all the assets, condo (although it was 100% Foreign Freehold, best move ever)..It's taken a lot of effort to walk away as she was incredibly sexy and fun but dangerous. I had to totally block all contact and never look back, saying nothing . It still hurts ,but I know I did the right thing and consider myself V lucky. I listened to my gut and instinct at the time. I would have lost a lot more if not the lot and then just been replaced eventually, I am 100% sure of that.
Thank you too for sharing what I can imagine is a very painful experience you're going through and yes it's very hard to walk away when emotions are involved
She must have been frustrated Baz that the fish slipped off the hook, lot of time and planning must go into the long con 🥴
My Filipina wife has taken me down too after 14 years marriage. Nice to hear you're now happy.
Sorry for that mate
The best lessons come from the most painful experiences! And you've learned, grown and matured from those difficult endeavors.. Most importantly, you are resilient and able to bounce back and recover fairly quickly, with minimal damage and a good attitude. We, (you, me and everyone) really lose when we cant trust again or have bitterness, anger or resentment. Good job, great attitude and good luck, sir.
Cheers mate, have a great day
I love it the dog saying grab a pair and leave her. You traveled down the hard road to success. Congrats!
Haha cheers mate
Waaaw....A real life experience presented in a way that most reasonable people would understand and appreciate that at the very least "the journey and experiences of life" sometimes take us to places and situations that we never ever imagined. Thanks for sharing. It's stories like this that help make the "road" a bit easier to travel for some of us no matter where we go or find ourselves. Live long, live happy, live healthy and keep doing what you do. Cheers.
Thanks mate much appreciated
Good on you for making such an excellent effort to explain your honest and heartfelt experiences, in order to help others. Very happy that things turned out so well in your life. All the best.
Cheers mate
Well done Trev for sharing a difficult story. Takes a lot of guts and she lost more in the long run
Cheers mate
Loved this. Good honest story of majorly fucking up in life. You bounced back anyway mate.
Cheers mate
Thanks Trev
Just been through it.
4 years then the silent treatment overnight.
Lost so much because it’s not worth trying to fight for it.
Killed my dream, but hopefully rebuild 🙏
Sorry for this mate, stay strong
Now you know for sure! Don't look back, turn it into a new life opportunity! Good luck, walk don't run. Cheers!
Fool me once shame on you fool me twice………….
@@CrazyClips876 anything you would like to say ?????
@@darrenjones3118 simply saying you made a mistake and to learn from it and not do it again. Rent everything never buy no matter what a Thai woman tells you or how much she”loves” you.
The problem is Im an obese bald headed 65 year old but in my minds eye I am still as handsome as I was in my youth. How on earth could that beautiful 25 year old Thai girl resist me. It is pure narcissism on my part...the most attractive part of me is my bank balance and the fact that should I marry a thai girl she wont have too long to wait to inherit my hard earned
Life is for living, go do it
Trev, your courage is apparent in your vulnerability. To take responsibility and ownership for your mistakes because you were unaware, uneducated in Thai ways and having a big heart and a generous soul is not a bad personality characteristic...it was a life lesson. I did much research on Thai culture and Thai women before relocating to Thailand. I came looking for love and a long-term relationship. I still made many mistakes, nothing catastrophic but certainly those that created a need for adjustments in my perspective and expectations. I came in search of the simple and natural Thai lady from the farming community in the North. We enjoy both worlds, rural and natural farming but also time in Pattaya golfing and Island hopping. After 18 months in Thailand and learning so much... sitting and enjoying a cold Leo on the beach in the early evening in Koh Samui with my Sweetheart I couldn't help but think and say..."This is the life, this is so nice, what a beautiful place, what a beautiful country....thank you Love." We all create our own destiny via our own choices...there are always mistakes. Don't worry about being right all the time, instead try to be wrong less and be grateful for all you have experienced in this wonderful life. My advice, go slow, a little at a time. It is all one big gift...give more than you take. Cheers!
Cheers for sharing your experience, yeah life is all about learning curves and I have had a few lol
@Chris Small, ...wow!! First time I read such a intelligent, and very good understanding, .. i guess your a man with loads of life experience, and a deep understanding and writing it. You must have studied psychology, or are a very talented high EQ person,.... I humbly say,... I love meeting people wise as you,... And only listen. I've nothing even close, to add after reading this.
I'm not being sarcastic !!! I'm not easy sucking up like this,... But i just needed to react to someone's by coincidence, reading another reply...
Your amazing!! I'm no idiot, but reading this!...i still have much to learn.
👍 ✌️
Give yourself a lot of credit Trevor!! You know what I'm mean.
Hard lessons, it's about forgiveness and faith.Your good people and that's priceless
Thank you very much and yes I don't bear any grudges I've moved on in my life and I'm happier now with my wife than I ever have been
Men, everywhere in general and especially where you are; nothing more than walking cash registers. I never take anything women tell me seriously.
indeed
@@Buzzinpattaya I know many men here in the US that make much less than their wives. I know one guy who is a contractor who has never made more than $40k a year. His wife is a nurse practitioner that makes $150k a year plus has the health insurance through her employer. He gets drunk everyday. She never stops bitching but won’t leave. It’s not always the man who taken advantage of.
💯
@@georgebrooks3873 Yep it can work both ways, men also relieve women of cash. Got to keep an even keel on it 👍
Good man Trevor
You've helped someone, somewhere, from making the same mistake you did. Thank You!
No worries!
Hi Trevor, that cancer lie from your ex filled me up with rage. I lost both my sons aged 23 and 29 to cancer two decades back and I can completely relate how you must have felt. Though you’re laughing it off, losing it all isn’t a big joke. I’m so glad that you’re doing well with your present wife and life in Thailand. May it remain like that forever, best wishes.
Both boys? That’s heavy.
I wish that on no one.
I can't imagine how losing your son's must have been, catastrophic at best....so sorry to read this mate, genuinely sending you my best wishes to you...... Fuck that's so hard to get my head around your loss!!!!!!
Yes I lost my father and my older brother to cancer. The only positive thing that I could take away from it was that neither one of them suffered for long. It was fast and they both passed away at home with family around them. Cancer still sucks. I can’t imagine losing two children.
@@reread2549
RIP.
I am very sorry to hear about your son's 😭 my wife was diagnosed with Stage 4 lung cancer on the 19 August, it's spread to her spine and she is now suffering from a fractured spine. I am taking my darling home to The Phillipines in January
What a great story, I can’t thank you enough. I lost my wife after a 42 year relationship, 8 years ago. I am very vulnerable, & this could happen to me. I have tried to get a lady to spend sometime with me. The chat is always questions about my finances, how much is my house worth, what pensions do I receive, what’s my Company worth? I never wanted to be on my own, man shouldn’t live on his own, two heads are better than one, aren’t they? Happy New Year to you.
Sorry to hear that
You've been through a lot Trev. I really wish you well in the years ahead.
You deserve it mate. Keep up please with the updates and video's.
All good mate thank you
Very brave to share your storey Trevor. We all can get drawn into the lies over here. For my part having had 4 failed relationships where I sponsored a girl whilst still working and going backwards and forwards, I was about to give up on Thai women. Thats until I met my wife who was 19 and a gogo dancer. 11 years later we are now fully together and married for 8 years. These relationships do work but you just need to find the right one. By the way I am 35 years older than her.
Yeah shit happens mate
Cradle snatcher!
Thanks for sharing your experience. It's easy for people to sit back and judge or make fun, but it could easily happen to anyone.
No worries mate
I experienced worst in the states my friend. Looks snd money makes no difference. Your personality is a blast of energy people are drawn towards truth and honesty. Fun is the name of the game keep having fun in the end we are all buried alone with no money.
Thanks mate great shout
Glad that you had the emotional and financial resilience to come through this.
Thanks mate, was a tough time to be fair but hey ho....
I suffered the same fate, I don't know if you've seen Dave and Nat on Thailand Bound channel but it's a very must see for anyone coming to Thailand.
I don't follow other tubers, nothing against them just like to sit in my own little word of YT lol
Yes a great show a must watch definitely
Not your girl, it's just your turn. Even if you really like her, just compliment her and let her go. That's all you can ask for. Just be a slag and get in and out. That's life.
Gotcha
Huge respect to you mate, you are the better person for accepting the situation and moving on, which is never easy, take care and stay happy and healthy.
All good mate
Love is a form of madness and once you are fully consumed in it with a Thai lady...it's bloody difficult to walk away. Thanks for the honest video.
Well said mate spot on
That`s very true. Love is an form of madness and once you are fully consumed in it (epescially with an beautiful, hot thai lady) it is bloody difficult to walk away. I`ve been in the same situation as well, and i know how it feels.
Same thing happened to me dealing with a Thai woman. Bought a house and was planning to retire. Ended up having to walk away from a newly built house. Thai ppl in tourist areas learn very easy to take advantage of foreigners. I was giving this woman money every month and she still insisted on staying in the club. Maintaining her self image in front of other aided in her downfall. Sad part was learning her parents and family whom I helped quite a bit were in on the scam to hide her real intentions. the end, she lost everything b/c she was never taught money management nor how to run a businesses. Great life lesson learned. I regrouped and got back on my feet. In the end I learned foreigners are mostly looked at as check books to Thai women.
Sad mate, hope you are okay
@@BuzzinpattayaThat was a few years ago. Much better now. Any woman you meet in a bar or club is damaged goods.
As an expat woman who worked and lived in China, Viet Nam, Thailand, Japan, South Korea, Tanzania, Iraq, and India yes! Foreign poor women look at male expats as ATMs. They think nothing of marrying one and divorcing because to those women it is a BUSINESS transaction. The expat men (I'm talking about regular guys here, not sexpats) are absolutely crushed and blindsided as they were truly in love with the carefully cultivated facade presented by the demon female. Beware expat men!!!!!!
An honest story .I can not point the finger as a similar thing happened to me.The house was not B3.7M but B1.4 M but with improvements and money spent on furniture it probably came to B 2M .We lived there 10 years up in Chiang mai .At least i got 10 years where i was rent free and when we sold she did give me B300k . Met her in Pattaya .She had a hair Salon off Soi Bukhao .The shop was flooded out at the time with 50 cm of water .She lived in the back room and her bed was swimming in water.We hit it off.I felt sorry for her and let her stay with me at my tiny Condo in Jomtien.The rest is history and it did work out and i was happy enough for 9 years at least ,until it went pear shaped mainly due to my lack of money .
wow thanks for sharing mate, wish you all the best
2 more days until im there. Can’t wait! See you there!
Nice one mate
Silent treatment such a classic. My two experiences with this ...
1. British wife. She could freeze me out all day then her mobile would ring and the smile would come on and the lively tone of voice! Then back to glum the minute her call ended.
Such an operator.
2. A Kenyan g/f, we had a fantastic couple of visits then on the 2nd one we were driving back to the airport and she went silent on me for 3 hours. We got to the airport and as we bid farewell she asked me to leave her with $100, well I gave her a $50 note and told her we will never meet again but that it had all been great until a few hours ago - adding that a woman who does silent treatment even before a ring goes on is simply a no-no. Imagine life 5 years down the line.
I went into the airport to check in, had a few Tuskers and laughed all the way home about the dodged bullet.
I had a similar experience with a Kenyan lady here in the UK. However the silent treatment always lasted 5 days as a minimum.
Any way we tried to patch things up by selling my Luxury flat and buying a house together and as I had just been made redundant from the Oil Industry but had a fair bit of cash, I paid 60% cash and she took a mortgage in her name for the 40% balance.
Anyway after 5 years it all went sour and she took my house keys away and made me homeless.
That was nearly 2 years ago, still fighting using Lawyers, she has the house and I am in a private let, paying someone else,s mortgage
Haha cheers for sharing mate much appreciated
Hopefully you didn't get a dose of something to remind you 😉
@@derekmay8679nothing like that, she was from the non promiscuous side of life
@@Ken_oh545 🙏
Thai's plan far ahead.
I know a Thai lady that came to Australia and married a local guy. She sent his money 'home' for years to build a house in her village.
She was working in my restaurant and she was telling me that she was just about ready to return to Thailand, and her Thai husband, as the house was now finished. 😁
They can definitely play the long game
Very common scenario .
Its cheaper by the hour.
By far
Very true. Why get married to them when you can just pay for a rump?
Fair play to you sharing your story and you're so humble and honest about it too. Hopefully it can help someone else avoid being swindled. I'm impressed you're so cheerful and positive, and I wish you all the best for 2023
One of life's learning curves
@@Buzzinpattaya honestly, I think you're stronger than me, if what happened to you had happened to me I'm not sure I'd have coped. So your fortitude impresses me. Been 6 years since I was last in Thailand, now that things are opening up after Covid I'll have to take a trip there again.
You lost the girl but got to keep your dogs, that's a good trade in my opinion. You'll get far more loyalty from a dog than you'll ever get from a woman!
100% mate, love my dogs
so much drama with women in an relationship. good luck with the dogs.
A high percentage of these girls are born into the hustle, know the game, and have no qualms about destroying people for fun and profit.
Indeed mate
your absolutely right but american and latin women do it to just as bad
Happened to an older friend of mine, he gave her and her family 100 of thousands of dollars, married her so she can get the visa ofcoarse and come to LA. Lets just say she has a house now and he lives in san bernadino. All they care about is the money and money to they family, you cant buy a girl no matter how lonely you get, and we all get lonely at times even with a wife laying next to you
Sorry your friend got burnt
@@Buzzinpattaya Im not sorry, this went on for years all of us at work kept asking him WTF are u doing??
wow Trevor, really enjoyed this vid. its a part of life that lots of us experience but never talk about. never thought that i would sit for 20 mins listening to someone just talking. thank you
Thanks mate, just wanted to show how easy this can happen
I lived in Thailand for three years back in the early 2000s .. I was working for an international company, got transferred there and everything this guy says happens to EVERY Farang who lives there!! The only difference is 90% wont ever admit it publicly.
Cheers mate and yes happens far too often
my thai landlady says 'you can take the lady out of the bar, but you can't take the bar out of the lady'.
Wise words
Had a mate that went to Vegas,he says….brought a hooker to his room..Big mistake,she drugged him with Mescalin, and kept on topping him up over a week, and took £19,200 off his credit card…he tried to sue the hotel,and they just laughed in his face.So it can always be worse!!!!
Wow thanks for sharing
Actually, his credit card company should have reimbursed him. It's fraud.
Fair enough, and well spoken mate. As an Expat American living in Vietnam for the past 10 years, your experiences are ringing true and very similar to my own. You don’t expect to fall in love but when it happens and they break your heart in half it hurts. However, from that disappointment, I have achieved a meaningful, rewarding, loving relationship for the past eight years with a sweet, honest, funny Vietnamese woman that I truly love. Life is too short to be bitter, and sometimes out of the trash heap of one relationship real happiness can be found. Love you brother for sharing your story.☮️
Thanks mate
I have lived in Pattaya for many years.....no comment. It is a syndrome called "Cherry Boy Thailand". I have seen it scores of time. First time away from home. Divorced. You are prime bait.
Gotcha
If it floats, flies or fucks you are always better off renting.
Haha true
Hi Trevor, are you not going to send your story to Peter at Thailand- Bound lol, good story mate, I will have to tell you mine one day lol...
No mate lol
Thanks for sharing your story, bro. You saved a couple of broken men from falling deeper.
No doubt!
Learning to be by yourself is a great benefit ,especially in Pattaya. I can go out and have my fun (outside my hotel).
Come home to my hotel sanctuary with no issues.I would hear screaming matches at night,doors slamming and guys being given hell.
I wouldn't start a business with a beautiful stranger.
I buy no meals or drinks for strange women whose friends want to rort me.
I never have an issue, I never get involved in dramas.
Fly low and alone.
Thanks for sharing mate, much appreciated
Middle aged men are vulnerable to pretty and calculating women especially when bereaved or divorced. I do not sneer or laugh at you I'm very glad your life is on track,but there were a number of red flags in plain sight! I'm a man of 67 years of age and I don't look bad for my age. I also know a woman twenty five or thirty years of age would be interested in me for money not looks! If men go into this situation in Thailand,Philippines or Vietnam. Be careful. The attention of beautiful women is hard to resist,but be realistic. You are a lucky man to have found happiness. I lost my wife a year ago after twenty happy years she was kind generous and caring I miss her every day,but I will probably live my final day's as a widower. Your story is a very cautionary tale.
Yeah it happens and as I shared happened. Sad but true
I'm so sorry for your tremendous loss. My mom died after 52 years of marriage and my dad also refuses to remarry. 😭🙏💐
People shouldn’t be leaving nasty comments. Women like her are predators. No excuse for that behaviour some men have committed suicide over things like this. It’s very serious & I feel for u. You was vulnerable & she prayed on that x I wish u all the best x
Thank you, I was a challenging time in my life but thankfully it's behind me now.
So old men going to third world countries to prey on young girls aren’t predators?
Happened to me in thailand to, getting scammed big time by an bar girl who was an predator also. So, i can relate for sure. Fantastic, to see you doing great now :)
@@Buzzinpattaya no worries & I’m glad u r doing better now :)
@@expanserecords1290 it’s so sad that this happens. I’m sorry it happened to u too. I’m glad u r ok now :)
Good on you for being candid with us mate. It's always the sign of a fully rounded human being when U can share things that went wrong and have a chuckle about it. I reckon 'Private Dancer' should be mandatory in-flight reading for anyone heading to the LOS...
Just wanted people to see how it works and can happen
My inxperienced middle aged Mama's Boy brother in law married a mid 30s Thai. Brought her back to Europe. She's a glorified unhappy housecat. I did my best to help him see the light. Never works.
Yeah, you were "just jealous...." or "didn't want to see him happy".
Well said
😅🤣😂 inexperienced middle aged mummy's boy 😆😆 the type who wants to be grown up but can't really manage without mummy? And mummy won't let go so no ones good enough for him? That's why shes unhappy.....not because she's Thai
Retire or buy land ...pay your bills and travel around ...never ever fall in love.....watch your back
Gotcha
@@Buzzinpattaya haha take language lessons in the country...and then you might avoid problems
@@gimmyherbert8217 can't believe he still hadn't learned it.
Just means you won't need her to interrupt...walking around with her ...can then hear conversation
That happen everywhere in the world with any woman…that said, full respect to you. I married a Thai bar girl 30 years ago. She gave me two lovely children and we all still are so happy in our lives….but that happen everywhere in the world with any woman..That said the guy who enter the tiger cage should know he courbe be eaten…
I guess mate
Thank you for sharing your story. I've met many men in Thailand with the same story, it is more common than you think.
I had a Thai girlfriend for over a year, and several other short term Thai relationships. I've definately learned a lot. There's a HUGE range of situations. I've had girls I pay a monthly stipend to (which goes to help support their family), to girls who never ask for money, pay for our dinners and taxis, just want my baby, etc. I've never lived with a Thai girl though...
Culturally there's a big difference than the west. They deeply believe in "being lucky", and live day to day, but lack empathy. Everything is opposite from the west. In America, children get an allowance from their parents, money flows down. In Thailand, money flows from the children up, to the parents, brothers, grandparents, etc. Thai women are head of household, so Thai men ask their younger female family members for money.
After my experiences, I would never, ever buy a house with a Thai women! That is considered a gift to her; you have no rights to it. Own your own condo, so if things go south, she must leave. I even dated a Thai girl who owns a house purchased by her ex foreign boyfriend! It's just wild, but extremely common. When you fall in love, it's easy to want to support them and at the time it doesn't seem like that much money, but you just have to be careful.
A lot of men here have told me their stories like this. I’m here 13 years my good friend who’s Thai she warned me b4 I retired here what not to do or who to trust.
Anybody that's been in any relationship should know that when one person loses interest in sex it's because they are cheating or have someone else in mind.
ok
@@Buzzinpattaya Not a criticism of you, we've all been there. Glad you're doing well now.
To be honest Trev, this isn’t necessarily just in Thailand! I had something very similar over here in the UK with my Italian ex. We all live and learn….
I get ya mate
Brave story sounds like you a positive person . Thanks for the advice
All good mate
Grateful for your story, you’ve got a big heart, we’re all suckers for love.
Cheers mate
Don't be silly. You pay for short term fun if you are into that scene..long term is a recipe for disaster for your savings. Remember fellas renting is cheaper then buying.
Okay
I have been to pattaya 25+ times and had my best fun there but it’s like going to the zoo. Enjoy the monkeys but don’t take one home when you leave the zoo.
Wisdom 👍
Gotcha
That is racist 😂
@@user-pf2ll4ck7f blah blah blah
@@user-pf2ll4ck7f Racist? After all the damages most girls do to men?
I learn a lot more when others share the mistakes they've made. Thank you.
Welcome mate
Apart from the bedroom aerobics, what on earth is a middle aged bloke and a 20-something girl going to have in common?
I know mate I know
£20 ?
Good Honest Story Mate, You'll Never Get To The Bottom of Them, Strange Breed, The Sad Thing is You Take Them Out of Poverty, Give Them A Bloody Good Life Style, And This How You Get Repaid, They Don't Deserve Us, Sometimes it's Better to Leave Them Picking Rice, Although it's Against Our Better Nature, At Least The Dog, Bless it's Heart Stood by You, Your Best Friend 👌
Thanks mate and yeah hard to understand at times
In Hindi they say “you can’t keep a snake”
No matter how well you treat it, it will one day bite you.
It’s a shame as there may be good Thai women but it’s generally better to to rent then bin them.
1: Never buy a house in Thailand because that will always be in someone else's name, instead buy a condo in your name.
2: You can own the car in your name.
You can own the car yes but a lot of paperwork
Thanks for sharing your story, absolutely astonishing….proves the old saying what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Glad you finally found happiness. Best wishes for the future mate 👍
Cheers mate and yeah look forwards not backwards
Sounds like every relationship/marriage I ve ever had , here in California. No Different. Pattaya, Los Angeles, all the same. But Great Video, and thanks for your expertise and hard work. hehehe
Thanks mate much appreciated
I had something worse my Thai girl and her father hired two guys to kill me as soon as they drained me of 500k they got ever kind of accident and life insurance on me soon as my baby came out two weeks later I’m dead 13 min I was stupid went back after learning to walk again to being shot at and finally shot in my arm smoking would been a heart shot of not smoking I can’t believe how and what they willing to do to take our money
Bloody hell mate
Whaaat?!!! 😳😳🚩🚩
You went back after they tried to kill you??
Don't you just love all these keyboard experts! Most probably have never even been to Thailand.....okay so I'm wrong they went to Koh Samui once on a 8 day package tour....sorry.
Your relationship went great for some time but not only was she a bargirl, she was 20 years younger and in her 20s. Hindsight is a great thing, I've never hooked up with any of them. I've been coming to Thailand since 1995 with a number of years where I didn't come at all. I've noticed great changes in the country over that time but bar girls never change. My interest was more in laid back islands and getting as far away from western tourists as possible, I loved the place.
Last year after several visits over the years I came to Chiang Mai for a couple of months, I have friends there with common interests. Out of that I met a nurse who is 50 years old. We get on fine, I've witnessed her working most days she works hard, I've met her family and spent a lot of time with her as I have been back for months over the last 12. Like you I never saw it coming, out of all the time I had spent in Thailand over so many years I never once considered a Thai woman for a girlfriend. It just never occurred to me as I was working, couldn't live in Thailand then and didn't consider bring one home. I didn't like the expat or tourist bar scene, I didn't like the idea of going with woman I never knew. That's just me. I never came to Thailand to meet woman nor find a wife. When I met this woman and started seeing her it came at a surprise, once I got to know her I found her to be similar to me in our needs and ways. I'm living there now with her. Where that goes who knows as its the future, but I've told her that I'm poor by western standards, I never speak of my financial position other than that. She's seen me live and spend frugally. I tell her I can't pay her way that she needs to work but maybe not so hard. She is happy with that. She could come and live in my country and easily find work, I've told her if we did that she's going to have to sign a pre nuptial and she's okay with that. I'd never buy a house in Thailand, why I have one in my country that pays enough rent to me to pay rent and food in Thailand. I think you have to be sensible and be ready to bail out if they put pressure on you to buy things like houses and pay for the family.
I'll also add I've been single for years and was happy with that and am happy by myself so I don't need someone. Why I'm saying all of this is that I totally understand that a guy can come to Thailand with no interest in the girls. I've been accused of not only being a sex tourist at times but into ladyboys and even underage girls. Some people because of their own thinking believe if you're a man and you go to Thailand you're either into the sex scene or you're a liar. For those who think otherwise to me guess what, it may come to a surprise to you that there are other things in life other than sex and beer.
Haha yeah they are special as in special needs lol
Trev,, not boring in the slightest!
I love how honest you are, your ex, depression etc.
Respect
Cheers mate much appreciated
I married one. 15yrs later it took until she made her move. Now im in court losing a 500k house and child access. They csn be very patient.
So so sorry for this mate
Is she still alive
sorry to hear that. That’s what I call playing a long game. How are you bearing up?
@@wintersun398 yes, it was the long game and in reflection its all obvious. Living in my car. Cant go home as she took out a vexatious AVO with police charge of "threat to kill". So shes in the house im out in my car... and they will side with the 'victim' just in case, every time. When it goes to court the judge will protect the girl despite absolutely zero evidence. Just her... pointing a finger.
I have a theory though.... 'every day above ground is a good day' so i am having a good day.
Also crypto is a divorcing mans best friend.
Yep. Happened to a friend of mine with a Japanese female. I'm a lady so I won't dignify that female by referring to her as a lady. He was in his 20's and so was she. She stayed with him just long enough to get the green card and spousal support!!!! 😠
The guys who get the most out of Thailand, Philippines, are the love um and leave um type guy's, to many mines in those rice fields
Cheers
Thanks for putting yourself out there like that.
No probs at all mate
Hell of a story thanks for sharing we all taken a big loss over a woman myself included.
Glad you enjoyed the video
You have to put yourself in her place. Why would a girl be attracted to a man old enough to be her father (except his wallet)
Interesting judgement mate
I would not think that . Thai men don't treat them well .
The answer to this video. .100 percent bang on cheers
Never open a business or buy a house in the woman's name. This is the biggest mistake you can make. Not just in Thailand but everywhere.
okay
Came to Thailand because I love spicy food🤣🤣🤥Give over mate
Think what ya like I don't give a toss mate, judge me all you want
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 gotta love the spicy food fs
I went to Thailand for the wild-life
Came for the food 🤣🤣🤣 ikr .
I've never been to Thailand but I'm still really enjoying the stories.
try come over mate
What a story! You could write a book with that one
Yeah lol
I don’t think the guy can be called stupid. Some women are experts in being sweet to a man in order to extract from him. The mistake
He made was taking her from a low
Financial status to independent business owner and she no
Longer needed the man! This to
Me is typical behaviour all
Women from all nationalities can be capable of.
Fair one mate
They manipulate men by their heart strings ooo no matter what country ooo obviously U hav a big heart ooo well done for yr honesty n the warning ooo
As you said when emotions get involved is very hard
Trevor thank you so much for sharing your story your honesty and frankness say a great deal about your kind and positive character .
No worries mate, just sharing it can happen to us all
Wonderfully honest video, Trev. Your best yet. We have all been there. As someone said recently here, most bar girls are "devils in angels bodies".
thanks mate
Alright, let's just get one thing straight here, in Europe, you can get an "escort", and they are many thousands of dollars a month, after all, it's not common for a guy in his 40''s to have a very beautiful girlfriend in her 20's, so, you GOT that for many months. In the United States, had you married someone, bought a house, bought a car, opened a business and then she says goodbye, well, half that is hers. How many men lost their house and car? MILLIONS.
So, your story is not uncommon in the male/female relationship world, women cost a LOT OF MONEY, what you paid for the house is less than what some pay for the divorce attorney.
So, don't look at it like you got ripped off, you paid a young woman for sex for a while.
lol, love these comments
Yes, basically!
English ladies can be just as bad, during lockdown I met Debbie from Doncaster on elite , like this chap , I fell hook line sinker for her charms , she turned out to be a complete fraud, lazy / moody and a bad history of cheating in her previous relationship. You never know what the hell you are getting with women of today.
Yeah emotions are the damage as we lead by them
Respect. Not many man will admit to their mistakes so honestly like you.
I just want people to understand despite how they think that it really is this easy to fall into the trap especially when emotions are involved
@@Buzzinpattaya for sure. Apparently there is the 3 day rule..
But as for your story I don't think you can call it you lost everything to a thai girl as from what you said she didn't scam you at all apart from the sick story but likely only to make you stay otherwise why would she say it
. It would be different if she made it up and was getting you to give her a load of money ans buy things for her to get treatment but that's not how the story went so I don't see how she did too much wrong but more it didn't work out and the point is more be more careful about thinking its the one and forever and investing everything into cars and houses