TOTAL WAR MEDIEVAL 2 IS A PERFECTLY BALANCED GAME WITH NO EXPLOITS - Assassin Only Challenge

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 29 ก.ย. 2024
  • Medieval 2 Total War Is a fantastic grand strategy game from creative assembly. It was the game to follow on from Rome Total War one of my favourite strategy games. The Total War Franchise combines elements of 4x strategy with RTS battles perfectly simulated to be historically authentic. Sadly however what if you are interested in the War side of Total War. What if instead we add an extra funny challenge to the mix! We throw war out of the window and embrace a unique form of pacifism! We attempt the Assassin Only Challenge in Medieval 2. So today The Spiffing Brit will be discovering is Medieval 2 Total War Is A Perfectly Balanced Game With No Exploits! Or If the Assassin Only Challenge is broken and potentially too much of a glitch in the game.
    This video game exploit video will be jam packed with a best bits funny moments montage style of editing similar to that of Valefisk, Robbaz and RTgame. So sit back relax and grab a cup of tea to enjoy with the spiffing brit!
    Magestic Merch: freshmerch.fm/...
    Patreon: / spiffing
    Twitter: @thespiffingbrit
    Discord: / discord
    title: MEDIEVAL 2 TOTAL WAR IS A PERFECTLY BALANCED GAME WITH NO EXPLOITS - Assassin Only Challenge
    Last Total War Video: TOTAL WAR WARHAMMER 2 IS A PERFECTLY BALANCED GAME WITH NO EXPLOITS - Infinite Money Slave Challenge
    #funny #montage #Medieval2

ความคิดเห็น • 1.7K

  • @FlawedFabrications
    @FlawedFabrications 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1185

    tbh I'd probably hide myself in a castle and surround myself with priests if all my family members kept getting constantly and inevitably assassinated too

    • @MrEshah
      @MrEshah 4 ปีที่แล้ว +65

      I think the AI was holding a lovely coronation for the new king. Probably thought it to be nice to give the poor bastard a nice send off party.

    • @endo4137
      @endo4137 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      But the assassin would be disguised as a priest!

    • @SacreBleuPelican
      @SacreBleuPelican 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      Granted, one out of 20 priests protecting you is an assassin

    • @spynyi
      @spynyi 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      But what if the one being protected is the assassin?

    • @elysium7242
      @elysium7242 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      *Confused Milanese noises*

  • @JohnDoe-ds8um
    @JohnDoe-ds8um 4 ปีที่แล้ว +701

    "The opening move is just stealing things from France"
    Ah, the time old English strategy

    • @tiacat11
      @tiacat11 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Don't look now but you need just one more like.

    • @KillerofGods
      @KillerofGods 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Why just have one more like?

    • @Mygg_Jeager
      @Mygg_Jeager 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      And German. ;)

    • @JohnSmith-kg2rt
      @JohnSmith-kg2rt 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@Mygg_Jeager and anyone else

  • @th3highwayman
    @th3highwayman 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1275

    "My lord, the King has died. You are to become King."
    "No, no, oh god, no!"

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 4 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      Sorry you will have to pay tax

    • @dattilo1
      @dattilo1 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      duke*

  • @Force2reckonVods
    @Force2reckonVods 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2186

    "Sorry, we missed the target, you had a 95% chance to hit him"
    Sorry, when did we go back to playing XCom?
    Edit: *psst* guys we're only 200 ish likes away from spiffs comment, you should totally like this so we can take over :3c

    • @aidangame
      @aidangame 4 ปีที่แล้ว +102

      *PTSD INTENSIFIES*

    • @lawrencecole6527
      @lawrencecole6527 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Hahaha =D

    • @sithlord5149
      @sithlord5149 4 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      XCOM be like that you stand right next to the alien and you still miss

    • @singleplayermoments
      @singleplayermoments 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Oh dear, looks like XCOM isn’t the only game that punishes Spiff for exploiting them.

    • @Force2reckonVods
      @Force2reckonVods 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@sithlord5149 Over 500 hours in New XCom/Xcom 2 and as much in old XCom's. It do be like that.

  • @malek0093
    @malek0093 4 ปีที่แล้ว +71

    6:55 "If you are on a boat, you're immortal to assassins"
    Letho from The Witcher 2 would like a word with you

  • @ShAd0w0100
    @ShAd0w0100 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Ah, Medival II: Total War...
    My first introduction to the balanced art of savescumming.

  • @asdasdasdora
    @asdasdasdora 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    Honestly, playing the game as intended would be easier and MUCH less tedious, than continuously searching for the enemy faction members and reloading the game hundreds of times.

    • @jumbo4billion
      @jumbo4billion 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      It's more fun like this. All the total war games can be beaten using exactly the same formation and tactics for every battle.

    • @asdasdasdora
      @asdasdasdora 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@jumbo4billion It doesn't look like he's having much fun tho

    • @muglypunt968
      @muglypunt968 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Lol who plays total war for fun

  • @DauntlessAdonis
    @DauntlessAdonis 4 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    *public service announcement*
    " Remeber to be drinking your warm cup of tea everyone!"

    • @commandantkotin
      @commandantkotin 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Or prepare for the consequences

    • @Da_Shark
      @Da_Shark 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I'm afraid warm is not an option here in Canada

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      And remember to pay your tea tax

  • @PokemonButcher
    @PokemonButcher 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    I am including this in the D&D campaign I have been planning. Just think of it: A nation that had no armies, only assassins. Rather than diverting superfluous resources into training and sustaining a war machine, they needed only to invest their efforts in a few gifted specialists. They conquered anything they put their mind to through cunning, deceit, manipulation, subterfuge, stealth, and relentless, silent strikes from the dark, without ever fighting a battle. Once all leaders and their subsequent replacements were removed from a target nation, that nation's society fell into chaos. Then, the assassin-nation (ha) would put one of their own in the seat of power. It just makes sense!

  • @thesiixth7770
    @thesiixth7770 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I bought this game back in 2006 and didnt kno what was goin on and took it back and picked up the original mount and blade for the first time . Years later im now playing Rome 2 and Bannerlord bc of that one day

    • @owen4108
      @owen4108 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sounds like a huge W ngl

  • @Cryten0
    @Cryten0 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    On this episode Spiff shows us the totally unknown exploit of ... quicksave.

  • @Unelith
    @Unelith 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    The Spiffing Brit: *this video*
    The nobility in Dune universe: Hmm, interesting

  • @smcasas9367
    @smcasas9367 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Remember Legendary Geishas in Shogun TW? Now that was an overpowered unit.

  • @theregalproletariat
    @theregalproletariat 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    "poison blowdart technology"
    Hollow stick, spiky thing covered in mistletoe juice.

  • @dylanram4653
    @dylanram4653 ปีที่แล้ว

    in one game britian build an asston of priests, despite the pope hating him he had alot of cardinals, but even had a crusade on london which ended immediatly cus the pope died next turn

  • @jonathanraithel5726
    @jonathanraithel5726 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    If you say peasants are useless, you’ve obviously never used them to activate cannon towers and passively bombard a sieging army. Cheapest and 2nd most satisfying way to defeat the Timurids.

  • @Arouninj
    @Arouninj 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Spiffing: Who needs war. Give peace a chance.
    Trump: So anyway I started blasting.

  • @benrichardson7559
    @benrichardson7559 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Genuinely had a Yorkshire tea when I started this video

  • @GrandAdmThrawn
    @GrandAdmThrawn 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    The best Total War game with the biggest selection of fantastic mods.

  • @petresko1041
    @petresko1041 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I was messing up The Holy Roman Empire with assassins for so long, that the faction leader got Insane and Paranoid traits, which he then passed down onto the faction heir. It was hilarious!

  • @gitman3486
    @gitman3486 ปีที่แล้ว

    "poison blowdart technology" lol you mean stone age tribe level tech? Yeah I think they could have managed that in medieval England

  • @Whitefury010
    @Whitefury010 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    We need a "family member" counter in the corner... its said so many times .

  • @fritzberggrenii9679
    @fritzberggrenii9679 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    PLay more of this game i like it!

  • @jimcrow582
    @jimcrow582 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    This exactly how Frey family destroyed Stark' s power

  • @jackknife89actual
    @jackknife89actual 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Here is another game I have spent countless hours on, and yet I never thought to cheese out my assassins like that. My tactics ran more to just ridiculous archer and artillery, break-them-before-they-get-to-you tactics.

    • @jackknife89actual
      @jackknife89actual 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      England was a good one for that. ridiculous ranged units, but even if they enemy makes it to your lines, good luck breaking those lines. And watch out for the heavy cavalry charge from the flank....

  • @neox464
    @neox464 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Drinking game: every time he says family member take a shot.

  • @kanaishkgarg
    @kanaishkgarg ปีที่แล้ว

    These assassin's must be a myth in this world

  • @dandandowntown
    @dandandowntown 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Geisha in the first Total War Shogun. Very balanced lol.

  • @voidtrotter6217
    @voidtrotter6217 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Yeah Spiff, make Rome one too!!!

  • @shogunjim4257
    @shogunjim4257 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    bro cavalry in M2TW is the BOMB, much stronger than anything else and much more fun to play.

  • @lucde_ville4743
    @lucde_ville4743 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Total War : Blasphemy
    Ordering a Spifcco Teamug and drink coffee out of that

  • @AvidgamerZ
    @AvidgamerZ 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    What I would like to see is a "Balanced" Path of Exile gameplay. Please make it happen.

  • @regglesg3599
    @regglesg3599 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Literally waiting for this ever since I discovered your channel, thanks!

  • @OeNoesRAWR
    @OeNoesRAWR 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    The game didn't bug out - to unlock the other playable factions you have to win a campaign with one of the initial six factions!

  • @the_rover1
    @the_rover1 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    wait, what? one of my favourite games full of childhood memories is supposed to be broken? NOOO WAY!

  • @newbsthirdaccount9777
    @newbsthirdaccount9777 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Dude this is my Stick War Legacy strat

  • @Mark-nc2nx
    @Mark-nc2nx 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    You can do a other exploot.
    If you have a lot of priest en leven them up. One of your priest can become the pop..
    En you can determine the crusade.

  • @Ajax-wo3gt
    @Ajax-wo3gt 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    I would have liked to have seen what you use the OP crossbowmen and the OP Vencian economy.
    On a different note, how about breaking XCOM and XCOM 2?
    Also, I understand your disapproval of coffee, but what about herbal teas?

  • @kkproductions9033
    @kkproductions9033 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hey, Spiff! Would love to see you play Age of Wonders 3!

  • @blitzkrieg8776
    @blitzkrieg8776 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    "Peasants are garbage"
    I literally had off 3 groups of knights with 4 peasant groups in a siege on a wooden fort so I don't know what you are talking about.

    • @joevenespineli6389
      @joevenespineli6389 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      *held off(?)

    • @joevenespineli6389
      @joevenespineli6389 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Right uhm who breached the defenses then? You cant assault a settlement with cavalry

    • @blitzkrieg8776
      @blitzkrieg8776 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@joevenespineli6389 Dismounted Feudal Knights, a French unit.

    • @joevenespineli6389
      @joevenespineli6389 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@blitzkrieg8776 ah alright, just trying to clarify

  • @CarbonKnights
    @CarbonKnights 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    One of my favourite games of all time...
    I can't wait to see how Spif can break it!

  • @HhHh-uh8lh
    @HhHh-uh8lh 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    quick save
    *reality can be whatever i want*

  • @GaiusMarius1996
    @GaiusMarius1996 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Do Rome 1 but win by only using diplomats :D cash is king!

  • @Tomson419
    @Tomson419 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    it's like saying fifa is broken because you can simulate all games in career mode until you win all of them, reload if you lose

  • @fckgoogl
    @fckgoogl 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I'm still waiting for EU4

  • @wotwott2319
    @wotwott2319 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1176

    Spiff: "I'm going to assassinate the entire royal family of the Milanese"
    Milan: *aggressively makes so many babies so that spiff can never assassinate them all*

    • @slashshooter003
      @slashshooter003 4 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      Well, I guess the Milanese (AI) is... "Productively" aggresive. =)

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 4 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      Hello there citizen of the mighty British empire I need u to assassinate a milanese head of state

    • @Elyseon
      @Elyseon 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Fuckers...

    • @hetecks1385
      @hetecks1385 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@bruhdude2725 oh
      I'm from a time that there's a thing called "peace" in the world

    • @Drebolaskan
      @Drebolaskan 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      @@hetecks1385 Don't make me send my assassin in after you

  • @AsianPersuation24x7
    @AsianPersuation24x7 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1936

    If your on a boat and that somehow makes you IMMUME to assassins they obviously haven’t played Skyrim...

    • @TheMordpheus
      @TheMordpheus 4 ปีที่แล้ว +140

      or watched the Trailer from Witcher II Assassins of Kings .... Spoiler Kings are dying!

    • @Pienimusta
      @Pienimusta 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      or Witcher 2

    • @fatrobin72
      @fatrobin72 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      well since Skyrim was barely a twinkle in Todd Howards eye when this came out... the same year as Oblivion...
      as for the "what about Witcher 2" peeps... well since the staff of CD Project Red were possibly playing this game when polishing the gem (or was it PC stress test) that was The Witcher (1) I am sure those Tim travelling masters of CA had seen that scene and disagreed heavily with it when deciding that this game would have the glorious feature (technical term) that boats were not places for assassinations

    • @teaappreciationindividual505
      @teaappreciationindividual505 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Someone clearly should have told Titus Mede that the tactics that he played were for the wrong game

    • @TheArklyte
      @TheArklyte 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Boat? Assassins? *[Laughs in P-38G]* The only place we have not assassinated anyone is space. _Yet..._

  • @sockmonkey1994
    @sockmonkey1994 4 ปีที่แล้ว +904

    Advisor: Every noble is being assassinated when they go out, what should we do?
    The King: You're right, a brisk walk through the market does sound nice

    • @ZombboniZZ
      @ZombboniZZ 4 ปีที่แล้ว +104

      Advisor: Doesn't that make you easier to assassinate
      The King: Don't be silly. It's the nobles that are being assassinated, not kings.

    • @whoareyouyouareclearlylost323
      @whoareyouyouareclearlylost323 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@ZombboniZZ lol

    • @dk-sky3820
      @dk-sky3820 4 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      The King: Don't worry about my protection, that's what 100 ballistas are for.

  • @jovandimitrijekolaric2549
    @jovandimitrijekolaric2549 4 ปีที่แล้ว +298

    France - France
    Germany - Germany
    Balkans - that region over there

  • @JARiS1005
    @JARiS1005 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1033

    This game is worthy of a remaster. We need it upgraded.

    • @bakersmileyface
      @bakersmileyface 4 ปีที่แล้ว +82

      Medieval 3 would be great too.

    • @JARiS1005
      @JARiS1005 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      @Crawling Chaos it's heavily outdated and unoptimized. I'm sure you can appreciate a more polished experience with the same mechanics.

    • @ahappybadger302
      @ahappybadger302 4 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      @@JARiS1005 If CA just optimizes it better and just add better grahphics then it will be perfect. I don't want anyting fancy new to be added tbh

    • @Axelerati0n
      @Axelerati0n 4 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      @@ahappybadger302 Yeah, the AI could use a serious revamp as well. Their diplomatic behaviour is sometimes outright nonsensical. Like Denmark sieging my english cities when my empire is the entirety of the British Isles and the whole atlantic/north sea coastline from Antwerp to Leon, with marriage alliances with France, HRE and Poland, perfect relations with the pope and my cardinal in the papal throne. You could have taken the trade rights and thrived, Danes, but no, you had to expand west and now you get excommunicated, have a crusade called on your capital and now you get gang-raped from every direction by all christian nations at once, good job AI!
      Other than that I have always loved the game, there are just so many viable strategies and unpredictable events which guarantee that no two campaigns are ever the same. I still enjoy it to this day.

    • @theanglo-lithuanian1768
      @theanglo-lithuanian1768 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      1212 ad mos is pretty good

  • @HiddenInTheTruth
    @HiddenInTheTruth 3 ปีที่แล้ว +321

    He clearly thought the nobility was cursed with all the random accidental deaths and weird timeline issues so he surrounded himself with priests to try and ward the evil spirits. Didn't work but good effort anyway.

  • @PenguinWithInternetAccess
    @PenguinWithInternetAccess 4 ปีที่แล้ว +707

    The only thing I like to do in this game is create gigantic armies led by bots and watch them fight with the Lord of the rings music playing ominously in the background

    • @ThePiranha77
      @ThePiranha77 4 ปีที่แล้ว +78

      May I introduce you to a mod called Third Age total war? Its literally that but with fully changed map and units to the whole middle earth :D and if you want even better go for the divide and conquer submod of third age which is developed still and expands game so much

    • @h0llygh0st
      @h0llygh0st 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@ThePiranha77 This is one of the best mods I've ever played, shame no big TH-camrs have picked up on it yet.

    • @AraAraMedia
      @AraAraMedia 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@h0llygh0st Big total war youtubers play the 3rd age mod a lot?

    • @colleyflower7408
      @colleyflower7408 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@h0llygh0st Pixelated Apollo and LegendOfTotalWar dont count?

    • @kchgamer1788
      @kchgamer1788 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      h0llygh0st look into the total war TH-camr community. Pixelated Apollo, JackiFish, lion heart, they all play Third age.

  • @benangell1403
    @benangell1403 4 ปีที่แล้ว +407

    "Its as easy as that" says Sir Spiff after save scumming throughout the entire episode...🤣

    • @Da_Shark
      @Da_Shark 4 ปีที่แล้ว +58

      Perfectly balanced time travel you mean

    • @benangell1403
      @benangell1403 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Roberts though the almighty power of Yorkshire Tea!

    • @aidenpons9584
      @aidenpons9584 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      The really fun part is lategame when you have 20 assassins you don't even need to savescum, your chances are just so high and you can take the occasional loss!

    • @lynarisevershadeshadowfall1684
      @lynarisevershadeshadowfall1684 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Worst part is you can just go to the files and unlock the factions, it's super easy, but longer videos more revenue I guess. :3

    • @aidenpons9584
      @aidenpons9584 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      @@lynarisevershadeshadowfall1684 Well, if you were watching Spiff for the actual technical exploits you're possibly watching the wrong channel or should watch at 2x speed. I watch Spiff for THE GLORY OF THE BRITISH EMPIRE, the shameless plugs of the blessing that is Yorkshire Tea, and generall Spifcrackery. :P

  • @BlackWolf18C
    @BlackWolf18C 4 ปีที่แล้ว +544

    Royal guards: "You there!"
    Peasant farmer: "Me, sir?"
    Royal guard: "Yes, you. You're the King now. Congratulations."
    Spiff's assassin: Poison dart!
    Royal guards: "Oh no! The King is dead! Quick, find his son!"
    Spiff's assassin: "New target acquired."

    • @a5-806
      @a5-806 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      LOL

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Soory I'm going to have to stop you now you should go and pay tax

    • @joshuablackmon939
      @joshuablackmon939 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      This made me laugh

    • @conan2096
      @conan2096 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      poor hugh is getting some serious tennis elbow from all that stabbing.

  • @oliverjones1000
    @oliverjones1000 4 ปีที่แล้ว +516

    Enemy lord: why, why do I feel like this man has tried to kill me before
    Spiffing: this... is requiem

    • @ChosenInvisiball
      @ChosenInvisiball 4 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      @@thespiffingbrit That's what she said

    • @imperialguardsmen9491
      @imperialguardsmen9491 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Oh how the turn tables

    • @madafaka2666
      @madafaka2666 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      He also said Venice instead of Venezia, I hear angry ice noises coming this way!

    • @oliverjones1000
      @oliverjones1000 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@madafaka2666 WRRRRYYYY

    • @PobortzaPl
      @PobortzaPl 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@thespiffingbrit Milanese should had been spawning with "paranoid" trait.

  • @Cybermat47
    @Cybermat47 3 ปีที่แล้ว +189

    Spiff: ‘You can unlock a faction just by killing all their family members!’
    M2TW: ‘nah’

    • @GirolamoZanchi_is_cool
      @GirolamoZanchi_is_cool ปีที่แล้ว +2

      You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. -Jeremiah 29:13

  • @gismogy
    @gismogy 4 ปีที่แล้ว +429

    Total war be like : Im going to send a big army to destroy you!!!
    Meanwhile
    Spiffing : here have a knife in your back

    • @AfferbeckBeats
      @AfferbeckBeats 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Also works the other way around. Mwahaha I have my doom stacks all ready to go. Next ten turns surrounded by three different factions agents: general wounded, army halted, general assassinated, army poisoned, can't move because it's winter and you'll lose half your men...

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hello Im going to have to tax you unless you serve the empire by assassinating a Iranian general

  • @krischan67
    @krischan67 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    Actually, if you just reload the same savegame again and again, the second assination attempt will lead to the same result all the time, i.e. if you fail at the second try, all susequent attempts at the particular target will fail as well (except you have multiple assassins and try a defferent order of attempts). In order to balance this unfair glitch, you have to save the game again right after reloading, but before trying again. That way, the random number generator will generate different values next time and lead to yet another new chance, in case the second attempt fails as well. In that manner, you can have infinitely many attempts.

  • @oliverwalker5692
    @oliverwalker5692 4 ปีที่แล้ว +290

    "Making gold as Milan is about as easy as trying to get Denmark to capitulate"
    *Bokoen wants to know your location*

    • @esbech
      @esbech 4 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      As a Dane I do not appreciate that joke, we do not capitulate that easi... Well okay we do, but still!

    • @xshadow2042
      @xshadow2042 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      the snakey sneaky way

    • @bubbasbigblast8563
      @bubbasbigblast8563 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@esbech What you should really be ashamed of is losing the race to form the first viable Scandinavian kingdom to bloody Norway of all places. Norway! Did you all get lost looking at the fjords or something?

    • @lucasbeck1391
      @lucasbeck1391 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@bubbasbigblast8563 no we were busy farming with our flat plains and rivers

    • @FrobergDK
      @FrobergDK 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @098765 Craper 4. And years of resistance.

  • @TheSecondPersona
    @TheSecondPersona 2 ปีที่แล้ว +98

    18:40
    Loading screen: "No one conquers who doesn't fight."
    Spiff: Hold my tea.

  • @kennethpeterson7524
    @kennethpeterson7524 4 ปีที่แล้ว +215

    "Why do they have so many family members? Where do they keep coming from?"
    Well, you see Spiffing, when a mommy and a daddy love each very much, the wrestle naked, and nine months later a bird gives them a baby. I don't know where the birds get the babies, that is just one of life's great mysteries.

    • @Greninjia
      @Greninjia 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@thespiffingbrit I think they teleported into the nether tbh

    • @atocanboi409
      @atocanboi409 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@thespiffingbrit they have such an overpowered nation they could spawn in family members through a time portal

    • @maxhutto3056
      @maxhutto3056 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Actually their reproduction rate is normal, the mothers just give birth to full grown adults.

    • @atocanboi409
      @atocanboi409 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@maxhutto3056 I'm not going to think about it too much

    • @Fopalope
      @Fopalope 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      So medieval 2 for both the player and the AI attempts to give factions as many family members as you have cities, so the game gives you adoption offers to bring new generals into the family, though the AI will go past this cap because ya know AI cheats

  • @Mechabang
    @Mechabang 2 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    Spiffing Brit: I'm going to assassinate all of the Milan nobility!
    Milan: Jokes on you, we're Catholic!

  • @martincooper8289
    @martincooper8289 4 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    What you don't see:
    The ridiculous amount of time taken to save/load total war games. Would definitely be easier to play properly xD Great vid though.

    • @ironman2818
      @ironman2818 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      There's a hot key for both that you can use mid cutscene so it's actually as fast as your PC can reload the game. I don't remember what they are off the top of my head

    • @martincooper8289
      @martincooper8289 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@ironman2818 Ah cool, didn't know that to be fair, but I think total war games in general are usually slower at loading than other games if the pc was kept the same kinda thing, even like more graphical games, I think probably because it has to like load like so much data, the positions of all armies, what units are in them, what everything belongs to, all unit healths/xp's, as well as all of the graphical stuff.
      I don't really know why actually I'm just trying to justify it on behalf of CA (for some reason?). If you have a supercomputer you can ignore my comment. But I think if you tried some side by side testing, or just played a lot of Total War (as I do) you'd know what I mean.

    • @martincooper8289
      @martincooper8289 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Ngl, even though I have Total War Medieval 2 collection on steam it's not actually installed so I can't compare with a high end computer using it (as to what I remember it being like) but Spiff does look like he was loading really fast, when I play TWWH2 these days it's still painful how long it takes with a good pc.

    • @Userius1
      @Userius1 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@martincooper8289 Rome 1 and Med 2 load almost instantly on any modern pc, low or high end.

    • @LilithNerevarine
      @LilithNerevarine 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      its pretty fast now, especially if installed on ssd

  • @llbrainjoker5742
    @llbrainjoker5742 4 ปีที่แล้ว +166

    The Spifing Brit is a perfectly balanced channel.

    • @METALFREAK03
      @METALFREAK03 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      @@thespiffingbrit this is a perfectly balanced reply

    • @wesleycowan363
      @wesleycowan363 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      This is a perfectly balanced comment chain.

    • @michaelmaclean9739
      @michaelmaclean9739 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@wesleycowan363 that was a perfectly balanced observation

    • @mitsvanmitsvanio6106
      @mitsvanmitsvanio6106 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      that was a perfectly balanced opinion

    • @blunderingfool
      @blunderingfool 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@mitsvanmitsvanio6106 That was a horrendously balanced statement.

  • @KazeNilrem
    @KazeNilrem 2 ปีที่แล้ว +39

    I get the feeling that the game had been fighting back against all the assassinations. Tug of war between them and the game populating new heirs. Other than changing the file, I do feel like the game came out as the victor.

    • @rubenheymans1988
      @rubenheymans1988 ปีที่แล้ว

      that's by default , at least a faction heir and leader , you have to kill them both

  • @keizervanenerc5180
    @keizervanenerc5180 4 ปีที่แล้ว +150

    Next: Pikeman are perfectly balanced in Rome Total War

    • @bl4cksp1d3r
      @bl4cksp1d3r 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      Defending towns against basically anything with militia pikemen 👌

    • @huckthatdish
      @huckthatdish 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Still OP but they are annoying as shit when you are on the offensive thanks to the uh... creative path finding in Rome Total War. But on the open field pikes + archers + a bit of cavalry to spice things up on the flanks is a guaranteed win.

    • @Jungstertag
      @Jungstertag 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Anyone seen that bridge exploit where they charge into your phalanx without even fighting and instantly die?

    • @radoslawpiotrpaszek3257
      @radoslawpiotrpaszek3257 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Pikemen have poor stats, what you need however are greek armoured hoplites who have ridicoulously high stats and you get very fast access to them, in I believe 5 turn. After that none of the faction can conquer your cities.

    • @cerdi_99
      @cerdi_99 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      i remember playing as egypt and omg hoplites do be like that

  • @Markfr0mCanada
    @Markfr0mCanada 4 ปีที่แล้ว +167

    And this is why game developers started developing anti-save scum mechanics.

    • @Rookiebatman
      @Rookiebatman 4 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      I've only watched a few videos from this channel so far, so I don't know if the savespamming is a regular thing, but I kinda feel like it defeats the whole purpose. Wouldn't practically every game be completely broken if you just used save scum?

    • @dmyt58
      @dmyt58 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      @@Rookiebatman this game is kinda broken anyway. As milan you can get 30 cities by turns 30 without using any exploits. Turn 1 capture Venice, buy bologna, capture Florence. turn 2 was Marseille and the Island fortress.
      For Venice just send 1 general, 1 spear and 1 mailed knight and besiege. AI will attack since their force is stronger but you can simply defeat them. and get the city. Similar tactics in use for other cities. Bologna only cost like 2-3 grand so its pretty cheap + free units.

    • @dmyt58
      @dmyt58 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Alvi Syahri Dont think so but i havent played anything except legendary in ages

    • @joa65
      @joa65 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Rookiebatman Agreed.

    • @joa65
      @joa65 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@dmyt58 Could be, but that guy dosen't show such mechanic, just lame save scumming.

  • @glenngriffon8032
    @glenngriffon8032 4 ปีที่แล้ว +128

    TW: If someone is on a boat they are immune to assassins.
    Edward Kenway wishes to know your location.

    • @lucasbeck1391
      @lucasbeck1391 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Didn't you play ac3?
      Haytham survived

    • @HandsomeGamerGuy
      @HandsomeGamerGuy 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@lucasbeck1391 And yet Edward died. And Haythem died too

    • @MechWarrior894
      @MechWarrior894 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I mean, it's kind of hard to sneak up on a boat at sea.

    • @sekliley7587
      @sekliley7587 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I forget, but was Edward an assassin?

    • @joltyjivs1518
      @joltyjivs1518 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@sekliley7587 no he was not he just worked with them.

  • @jlcburr
    @jlcburr 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    Ah yes, I've done the assassin exploit many times myself. I surrounded Rome with assassins who proceeded to take out the Pope, then his replacement, then the next replacement, and so on. Must've gone through about 30 popes just for the hell of it.

    • @tigerwarrior1787
      @tigerwarrior1787 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Papal Guard: "YOU THERE! YOU'RE THE EMERGENCY NEW POPE!"
      Assassin: *Rock*
      Papal Guard: "Ah crapbaskets..." *Sees Cardinal* "YOU THERE!!!"
      Assassin: "Aren't I supposed to be getting paid to do this?"

  • @ricktickb00m
    @ricktickb00m 4 ปีที่แล้ว +151

    "38% of the time, it works every time..."

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Shhhh don't worry take tea...
      He knows to much activate 28% chance

  • @SoullessCast
    @SoullessCast 4 ปีที่แล้ว +106

    Only after watching Spiff on the Yogs streams so much have I realized just how much deeper he pushes his voice for these videos XD

    • @jacobellinger8027
      @jacobellinger8027 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It's post editing that does this

    • @bl4cksp1d3r
      @bl4cksp1d3r 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      @@jacobellinger8027 that's.... that's not how editing works. You can clearly hear when he's doing deeper voice and higher voice. People can deepen their voice you know

    • @KingofJ95
      @KingofJ95 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      @@jacobellinger8027 That's... One of the dumber things I've heard today...

    • @bl4cksp1d3r
      @bl4cksp1d3r 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @S F "looks like". Ask Spiff if you want to know. Give me a proof please ^_^

    • @andrewstepanek8933
      @andrewstepanek8933 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@bl4cksp1d3r Do you think he narrates everything live?

  • @DominusRexDK
    @DominusRexDK 4 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    "Making gold as Milan is about as easy as trying to get Denmark to capitulate"
    I feel mildly offended now.

    • @aliasunknown4879
      @aliasunknown4879 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      But is he wrong?

    • @christiankongsted5084
      @christiankongsted5084 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I feel fiercly offended. >:(

    • @vincentmalasawmkimajongte7489
      @vincentmalasawmkimajongte7489 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Denmark has enough armour piercing to hold off an entire panzer division.

    • @Citiy3
      @Citiy3 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well as a Dane i am mildly offended but it is not like he is wrong Denmark hasn't officialy forught back since the 1900-century not counting the 2100-century

  • @APocketMonster
    @APocketMonster 4 ปีที่แล้ว +60

    After watching this...I'd LOVE to see Spiff play Fire Emblem xD
    "How do you miss a 95%?" *resets*

    • @baseballjustin5
      @baseballjustin5 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Or Xcom...

    • @asuragaming6671
      @asuragaming6671 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@baseballjustin5 hes done xcom. One of his more recent videos actually

    • @frknspacewizardbrett6044
      @frknspacewizardbrett6044 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      _Gets blank level up_
      "How did you even manage that?" *restarts chapter*

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      After seeing you I would love to see you pay tax

    • @skeletonwar4445
      @skeletonwar4445 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@frknspacewizardbrett6044 At least in Three Houses you can just go back in time and do a different action to change the rng.

  • @frisianmouve
    @frisianmouve 4 ปีที่แล้ว +75

    Milanese king: you over there! you're my son now, I'm going to adopt you!
    Nonono, please have mercy my lord, I still have so much to live for.
    King gets stabbed, congratulations you're the king! Alright as my first decree I'm going to adopt that random peasant over there because I don't like the way he looks at me, king sips on poisoned wine, guards get that peasant that's running away he's the king now!

  • @dominicperez3777
    @dominicperez3777 4 ปีที่แล้ว +74

    > Am into 20 minutes of this video
    > Realizes: "Hey, shouldn't you formally declare war on Milan and then do the assassinations?" 🤔
    > This happens: 21:02

    • @KGPeiper
      @KGPeiper 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yeah, the same thing with Scotland

  • @Yakkahboo
    @Yakkahboo 4 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    When this started I was like, "Im just boring I'd just unlock in the game files" so after watching the glorious downfall of Milan and Scotland Im glad to see that the game didnt let me down and required the stupid unlock anyways.
    Anyways, next, play as the Papal States!

    • @Damo2690
      @Damo2690 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Papal states are legit broken for a player

  • @joeykrack42
    @joeykrack42 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    Still one of my favorite games ever, and I actually ran a Venetian campaign yesterday lol.

    • @revolutionishere
      @revolutionishere ปีที่แล้ว

      The beginning for me is always ridiculously hard, so many rivals at home and abroad.

  • @FuligJakab
    @FuligJakab 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Glad to see medieval 2 here (also, rome total war would be great), but come on Spiff, you can do better! Show us some really cheesy exploits, not just quicksave&reload

  • @TheHuskyFamily
    @TheHuskyFamily 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    still the best total war game... i hope there will be a medieval tw3, where only AI/visuals/diplomacy stuff is fixed,

  • @garretteverett2613
    @garretteverett2613 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    As a rule-follower who feels bound to play fairly and with historical accuracy in this kind of game, it's an absolute delight to hear you say things like "It's going to take a lot of attempts and a large amount of reloading but we ARE going to murder this man".
    I've also realized through watching your videos of Total War and older RTS games that there was a reason that I, an internet-less peasant, was always destroyed at LAN parties by my friends who had internet access at home. There was no way any of us would have been able to figure out some of these exploits without outside help.

  • @dexybrd3280
    @dexybrd3280 4 ปีที่แล้ว +51

    When you had few Generals, you had a chance to adopt a General, and they become a family member which is why so many kept popping up for you.

    • @nigredoooalgown6245
      @nigredoooalgown6245 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      have not had....

    • @kingssorrow32
      @kingssorrow32 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@nigredoooalgown6245 technically this video was uploaded in the past, making had, not have, correct.

    • @kingssorrow32
      @kingssorrow32 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@nigredoooalgown6245 though he could have used a descriptive word before few, for example "when you had very few generals"
      To make the sentence more appealing

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Why attack a country when you can sell them opium now pay your opium tax

    • @skeletonwar4445
      @skeletonwar4445 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@kingssorrow32 When talking about a book or movie (this video counting the same as a movie in this case) you use present.
      Also the comment was about the situation of the AI enemy, explaining why they had so many family members all the time, not Spiff's own situation.

  • @theanarchonazbolinquisition
    @theanarchonazbolinquisition 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Spiff gives a new meaning to save-scumming

  • @dagnabbit3002
    @dagnabbit3002 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Who else wants a medieval 3 or medieval 2 remastered??

    • @joevenespineli6389
      @joevenespineli6389 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I'd prefer if they didn't change the physics of the game if its a remaster

    • @battleshipnope3271
      @battleshipnope3271 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      As long as we dont get this "new idea" of armies need to have a general with it for working like in rome2 or warhammer1\2.
      It was a novel experience for a while, but.... then i understood, what i simply want to throw legions upon legions of peasants onto enemy like i did in rome: total war.

    • @dagnabbit3002
      @dagnabbit3002 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@battleshipnope3271 Agreed. I really miss being able to send out small skirmish forces to do recon or damage all the enemy structures like you could in empire

  • @darklink604
    @darklink604 4 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    Spiffing Brit: Give peace a chance.
    Dark brotherhood: We gonna need more blades aren't we?

  • @kmpgos4158
    @kmpgos4158 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    May I suggest taking on "Fire Emblem: Three Houses."
    Not only it has so many mechanics that there must be a way to exploit them, but one of the core mechanics of this game are tea parties. You can both try to break the game and have tea with all students as much as you want. It's win win.

    • @AtomicArtumas
      @AtomicArtumas 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I mean, honestly, if you want to just faceroll the game just play on normal, recruit and train Lysithea, then laugh as she solos everything as a 20/20/20.
      Or Catherine
      Or.... really anyone, technically.
      As far as actual exploits go though, I'd honestly be kinda amazed if you could actually find one.
      Only "real" exploit I know of is FE7's "take control of the enemy team via a mine" glitch and then trading Vaida's OP spear to a unit that drops their item so you can get the OP spear.

  • @jamesglovecrazy
    @jamesglovecrazy 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Congrats on 1M subs man! I love your content! ❤️

  • @DynamicProGamer
    @DynamicProGamer 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I feel like this isn't really an exploit and really isn't unbalanced either, all you're doing is reloading when you don't get the outcome you want. You can do that in any game.

    • @thelastcasualty2696
      @thelastcasualty2696 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Exactly, this video was boring and repetitive. The title says "Assassin Only Challenge", yet every single time he failed he reloaded. I don't see any "challenge" in that.

    • @joa65
      @joa65 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Absolutely.

    • @joa65
      @joa65 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@thelastcasualty2696 100 % agreed!

  • @muppen74
    @muppen74 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Hmm… Hardly overpowered if you need to save/load over and over to make a strategy work. Rather it seems perfectly balanced.

  • @yamatoclassmusashi8830
    @yamatoclassmusashi8830 4 ปีที่แล้ว +56

    Nobleman: *Exists*
    Assassins: "Its free real-estate."

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You: "exists"
      My empire: tax???

  • @RobbieCargilly
    @RobbieCargilly 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    The Slough drop was so good :D

  • @mangobango5182
    @mangobango5182 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    idk if this is an exploite just because you had to reload the game numerous times to not break it.

  • @superhappyzeus
    @superhappyzeus 4 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    Huh taking out a general to solve your problems.
    Trump would like to know your location

  • @_yt_4081
    @_yt_4081 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    If you constantly save your game you will have 100% of success. This challange has no sense at all -.-

  • @ontaka5997
    @ontaka5997 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    The only issue I had with this game is that only family members could become generals.
    Other than that, it was great fun!
    I burnt tons of hours playing this game.

    • @antonkrieg3708
      @antonkrieg3708 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      If a captain wins a heroic or lopsided victory he could be "man of the hour" and get promoted that way.

  • @theinformationstation5328
    @theinformationstation5328 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I’ve just started watching the video and I’m so pumped to see this cause I’ve killed oh so many factions with targeted attacks and assassinations against enemy family members.
    Edit: I kinda object to this particular method. Save scumming is particularly egregious.

  • @PanzerShrek94
    @PanzerShrek94 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Prepares to throw dagger at the king
    some pesky woman sees and screams
    throws the dagger at the woman and run off

  • @timetraveller7294
    @timetraveller7294 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    this reminds me of the one campaign in which the last Scottish nobleman died in a thunder storm near Edinburgh, balanced weather events xD

    • @timetraveller7294
      @timetraveller7294 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @The Nova renaissance yeah, the game has some weather effects/events happening randomly...
      like erupting volcano, floods and storms. they can damage your army or in my case, kill the leader of a nation without a heir xD

  • @AsianPersuation24x7
    @AsianPersuation24x7 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    My favorite part is when he said: “Fantastic!”

  • @MagnusMoerkoereJohannesen
    @MagnusMoerkoereJohannesen 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Wow... Save-scumming for hours on end, so that you could unlock Milan - which didn't work - for their crossbow militia? For the rest of you out there, don't bother jumping through the same hoops; Venice has the exact same units, and are available from the start.

    • @lyntoncollins2758
      @lyntoncollins2758 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Milan is the best faction as you can bribe the pope on turn 1, buy Bologna on turn 1 for ~2020 florins, attack and defeat Venice on turn 2/3 without being excommunicated, declaring a crusade on turn 4, then packing up and emigrating to the Holy Lands, taking Jerusalem and Antioch, then defeating the Egyptians, then Byzantium, moving your capital to Antioch, consolidating until turn ~60 when the Golden Horde arrive and having a generally wonderful time about it all. It is a lot harder to do the same as Venice without getting murdered by the sneaky Milanese.

    • @MagnusMoerkoereJohannesen
      @MagnusMoerkoereJohannesen 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@lyntoncollins2758 See, that would have been a much better video!