I was pregnant and now i'm not (I had a miscarriage)
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 ก.ย. 2024
- *THIS IS NOT A PREGNANCY ANNOUNCEMENT*
TW: miscarriage/pregnancy loss
You may have been a little life but you are definitely not a little loss 👼🏼🤍
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Sweet Ella, like another woman on here said - your baby will always be your baby. And just know, 3 of 4 is the positive side of that statistic. Please don’t let this make you afraid going forward. You and Nick will have your rainbow baby and you will never seize to love your first little love and your first little life you created together. Sending so much love to you both. Alanah x
I'm so sorry, guys. A miscarriage is a pain and loss no one can understand unless they've gone through it. We lost 3 babies. One at 5 weeks, one at 9 weeks and one at 10 weeks. It's incredibly common but never spoken about. It's still so stigmatised.
My heart goes out to you both. Grieve, heal, and love each other xxx
I am so so sorry Ella. Thank you for being bold enough to share your story and I pray for you and Nick as you two navigate through this grief.
Ella, I'm so, so sorry. Miscarriage is the most awful club that you don't know how large it is until you join. Thank you for talking about it- so many people suffer silently and don't know how to tell people what they are going through. Take the time you need to heal and grieve.
So true. I have lost 4 and until I went through it, I had no idea how many women in my own circle had been through it too since no one talked about it.
I am so sorry for your loss Ella, thank you so much for sharing this with us and breaking the stigma around miscarriages. Your feelings are real and your baby was real and I hope you find comfort in that. God bless you and your family.
I’m praying for you. It is very very tough to get through & not a lot of people speak about pregnancy loss. I’m currently 24 weeks pregnant with my double rainbow baby & the pain from my previous losses never ceases. The farther along I get the more I think of them. I never forget. You can & will get through this. God will provide you a little bean in his timing & you’re gonna be so happy at the end. Stay strong, you’ve got this ❤
you should feel very proud of yourself for making this video and baring your soul for so many women to see ❤️ i hope your rainbow baby joins you soon Ella 🌈
I’m so sorry. We had years of infertility struggles and three miscarriages in between our two beautiful babies. They are now 16 and 21 . Be kind to yourself. I’m so glad you have so much support around you. A lot of people don’t understand how devastating pregnancy loss is. I felt like people expected us to “get over it” quickly and not talk about it. You are helping many by talking publicly about it. Much love ❤️
Oh, beautiful, I'm so sorry for your loss. I sent you a message on Instagram, but I wanted to share a bit more here. When I lost my baby, I felt very alone. What helped me was a vigil memorial service organized by the hospital. You might find comfort in doing something similar with your loved ones. Light a candle, read a poem or a letter, and say goodbye in your own way. Not knowing the sex was difficult, so I named my baby "Baby V." I went on to have two healthy baby girls, and I believe you will, too. My heart breaks for you but please know that i can empathise and resonate with what you're going through. God bless. xo
Being someone that struggled with infertility for 7 years I resonated deeply with this and balled my eyes at this video. But, I have just had our 2nd rainbow bubby (we have had several losses one as late at 20 weeks) that we found out about when we were travelling through Spain.
There is no words, actions or anything that will take away this pain. But also, please know there will be brighter days ahead 🌈
Sending you all our love ❤️
This is so heartbreaking I am sending so much love to you and Nick. I can’t fathom how common this is. You are the 4th person I follow closely that has had a pregnancy loss/ miscarriage in the last week or so. 2 other women have had ectopic pregnancies and another who I actually went to primary school with also had a miscarriage. Thank you for sharing this and helping break the stigma.
I just came across this video on my feed so I haven’t seen any previous videos of yours. But I am so sorry you experienced this. I had a miscarriage at 16 weeks with my second son on 4/12/2023. It changed me drastically in the way I view pregnancy for myself & it’s only taken me now, over a year later, to be able to watch anything related to pregnancy loss. It was one of the worst, traumatic experiences I’ve lived through & I am sorry that you have to experience it too. As fresh as it seems, it does get easier. Not better. But easier. I am now almost 37 weeks with a babygirl. I wish you all the best love & healing ❤
I’m so sorry, Ella. I had an early loss about a year after our daughter was born. And while that pregnancy was not a planned one, the loss of it rocked me (so much so that I avoided pregnancy as steadfastly as I could until very recently and our daughter is 3 now).
I’m so sorry you are having to experience this but you are not alone and we are all here to support you (both of you!).
So sad for you guys it’s heartbreaking losing a pregnancy. You’re so brave to talk about it as it’s often not spoken about. I too lost a pregnancy so I do understand how your feeling. Take your time feel all the emotions as it will help with the healing process. xx
I’m so sorry to hear this lovely.
In my experience when I had my loss between my two kids I felt numb also. It was one of the hardest things I ever had to get through. I had my eldest who was 18 months at the time so I think that helped me get through so much as I had my little blessing by my side.
The part I struggled with was trying again as I was so scared of experiencing loss again. So please allow yourself time to heal. It does take time but you’ll get there
I eventually felt comfortable in trying again and we thankfully fell with my rainbow boy who is now 8 months old
Thank you for sharing your journey. It’s really inspiring and encouraged me to just write this now and share mine.
Nick and yourself will make wonderful parents and I can’t wait to watch your journey when that day comes 🤎
I’m so sorry:( we just lost our baby around 6 weeks ago too. It gets easier but will always be hard. Grief comes in waves.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. The world just ends around you. And the next time is immediate anxiety.
I had four miscarriages and it’s so isolating. This time last year I was having my third loss. I can only say take the time to focus on healing and there is no linear line of grief. It comes in waves.
So sorry Ella. So sad I can’t imagine. Your time will come, take your time to heal and be together🩷
I’m so sorry for your loss Ella and Nick. Grieving the loss of a baby is so fricken hard but you will both get through it. All you can do is take one day at a time. Sending hugs and strength your way 💕
Ella I'm so sorry to hear your sad news. It's heartbreaking. It's hard and you'll never forget it. Unfortunately it happens more than we realise. Thinking of you. Take care
I've just had a miscarriage at 6 weeks too ❤ the instant you find our you're pregnant your start imagining your little human & life itself changes instantly as you start to mould your new future in your mind.
It's a grief like not other, mourning the loss of someone you felt you knew without ever getting the chance to meet them.
I wish you & Nick the best in your journey moving forward. Know that you CAN get pregnant, & that this time around unfortunately something was not quite right. But you keep trying!!!
I love your channel & your vulnerability ❤❤❤
I’m sorry to hear, I had miscarriage last year before Xmas it was the worse feeling. Sending love to you ❤
Sending so much love to you, it's such a heartbreaking loss. Take as much time as you need and know you're not alone.. those of us who have gone through it understand how shattering it is. 💔💔
we all love you and nick so much!! please take your time on your healing journey 🤍🤍
Oh Ella, my heart breaks for you. It's a terrible loss. Take your time to grieve. Thinking of you both x
Truly a profound heartbreak, I'm so sorry that you are going through this experience. Hope you are both taking good care of yourselves and each other. Please remember to give yourself grace during this healing time. Lots of love always ❤
I’m so sorry Ella. I’m one of the statistics, and you’re right, it is such a hard experience. My journey to motherhood was not as straightforward as I thought it would be, but I’m so grateful it has the happy ending that it does as I’m a mum to twins. I shared my journey dealing with loss on my TH-cam channel for anyone else who reads these comments and feels alone. It is such an isolating experience but you’re so kind to step out to share with others so they feel less alone. Keep being gentle with yourself, take it one day at a time, you are such a courageous soul x
I’m so sorry. As I mumma who has had 4 miscarriages and also has 2 beautiful children, I feel your pain and you are not alone.
Oh Ella I'm so, so sorry!! This was an incredibly brave and raw video to post, you're incredible and I'm thinking of you and Nick ❤
I’m so sorry for your loss sweetheart! Myself last year I had a still born baby girl at 36 weeks. Loosing a baby is the most heartbreaking experience anyone will go through. I hope you find happiness and keep trying ❤
So sorry for your loss. I lost a baby last April, it’s such a roller coaster of emotions. One thing that gave me comfort is that the baby always leaves a part of their dna with you so they leave a trace, and will always be part of you. Sending you happy baby dust for your journey ♥️
Sending love and healing vibes to you and Nick. This is fucked and not fair. Feel your feelings, be kind to yourself. And prepare your heart for your baby because they are on their way to you!
Oh Ella, my heart is broken for you guys!
I’m so sorry you have to go through that.
That truly is so fucking shit!
you two will definitely be parents one day and honestly the best freaking parents ever!! ❤
Much love Ella!!
I almost chose not to watch this because I’m so sad for you. A great fear come to life. I’m so sorry this happened ❤
So sorry for your loss Ella, thinking of you & Nick 🤍 Thank you for being so raw and speaking on this, it’s these conversations that help all women who have gone through this or will in future, to reach out. You will be wonderful parents in time x
aww so sad. Lots of people go through it. everyone can support each other in tough times like this and you're right, its good to talk about it.
Ella I have been watching your videos for years (before you were in Canada behindthesmile etc!) and have always appreciated how open and honest you are with your life and now you were so strong in letting us known what is going on .I am so sorry for your loss this is a quote that has personally helped me in my journey the past couple of months and hope it brings you some peace “How very softly you tiptoed into our world, almost silently, only a moment you stayed. But what an imprint your footsteps have left upon our hearts.”
sending my love to you and Nick xx
I’m so sorry for your loss. I’ve had 3 miscarriages and it’s a pain like no other. Learn into each other x
So so sorry for your loss Ella. I completely know the feeling. We fell pregnant on our honeymoon first try and I had a miscarriage at 10weeks. It was traumatic and devastating and I never thought I’d get through it. We fell pregnant with my daughter 3 months later and she’s now 1. Your time will come, you will get your rainbow baby don’t give up 🌈
We went through the same thing last year, pregnant in the first month of trying and then finding out at 6 weeks it wasn’t viable and my body holding it until 12 weeks before miscarrying. It’s such a horrible time. We were lucky enough to get pregnant a few months after our miscarriage and my daughter was born a couple of months ago. Thanks for posting this video, it’s something others going through the same thing will find comfort in and feel a little less alone in a dark time, I know I needed a video like this last year ❤
After years and years of trying I finally got that positive line after my second round of ivf…. But it didn’t stay. I lost it at 6 weeks. Devastated. Seeing that pink line tho was the happiest moment of my life and I will cherish it! Even if it never happens again I am grateful I ever got that line. I’m so sorry this happened to you. fertility is a cruel game. X
oh i'm so sorry 🥺🫶🏼
I also know exactly how you feel about the coffee… I stopped working out… then after It happened and I worked out again I cried all the way through 😢
So very sorry for your loss. Thank you for speaking about your experience and know you are not alone. Lots of ❤️ to you and Nick.
Literally crying with you watching this, I’m so sorry for your loss 🥺 what’s meant to be will be, everything happens for a reason 🩷
I'm so sorry Hun! I cannot imagine your heartbreak. ❤ Thinking of you both! Prayers for peace and comfort in this tough time!
Hi Ella, I'm sorry you're going through this. I too had a miscarriage earlier this year. I found out at our first scan and I think that day and the way it felt finding out will always stay with me. Sending you lots of love and strength at this time x
Ella. I am so sorry for your loss. My bestie had a similar experience last year and it’s really hard. You are not alone, and it will happening again when the timing is right. Take the time you need to process, moments to be sad, etc and when you’re ready you have so many people here and in your daily life to show you whatever form of support you need.
My heart breaks for you Ella + Nick. Thankyou for being brave to share and explain how it feels so that it becomes less “taboo” for others as it is sadly very common. ❤
I had a miscarriage at 5 weeks, and I found it crazy that the condolences last 1-5 days however the miscarriage sticks with us for a few weeks were our bodies continue the loss. I’m so sorry. It’s hard. It’s raw.
Such a difficult reality to come to terms with, I'm so sorry guys :( My brother and his wife had a still birth 2 months ago, it's a pain and constant wave/cycle of emotions we have all never experienced before. To make it all the way to the end, birth the most beautiful boy, to lose him just 10minutes later. It's numbing, and very very isolating. Miscarriages carry the same emotional trauma. Yet you will find the light and your family will continue to grow
Hi Ella, I had a miscarriage early last year… twins. It was devastating. Not my first either… but we then got pregnant shortly after with a little boy who is just the best gift. The pain never goes away but you somehow manage as time goes on, it’s like a piece of you. If you ever need to speak feel free to reach out! There are so many of us who have gone through this loss and you have our support! ❤
Lost my sweet bean 3 weeks ago at 9 weeks. Never felt heartache like that before. I’m so sorry for your loss 🤍
I am so sorry for your loss! Another TH-camr just had a miscarriage too. If you think it might help to talk to another woman who went through miscarriage, her name is Renee Amberg. She has vlogged her experience too.
It’s so very brave of you to share your experience. So many women don’t or can’t and so we don’t realise how many people have experienced this. It will help more than you know. Sending so much love and I just know it will happen for you and Nick and when it does we can’t wait to share in it xx
I’m so sorry! It just sucks. You are not alone and it is such a tough time.
As soon as you are pregnant you are a mum, you have these mum instincts, a due date and every second of every day that baby is on your mind. ❤
This was the best news ever in regards to you finding out you're pregnant! Such a big milestone along your journey and a huge life event. I cannot wait for you and Nick to be parents, you'll be amazing parents! I'm also very sorry for yours and Nicks loss, it's a huge loss and I'm glad you both have each other to lean on and Mabel moo. You's are doing great at life and are smashing out your goals! Your babies coming! Just know that, you's are both doing so well, they will come when the time is right! I'm very proud of you Ella for wanting to talk about your miscarriage and thankful that you wanted to share that with all of us here. Sending loves of love to you both.
Im so so sorry for you both, I am heartbroken for your loss. I’m sending you all the healing vibes in the world and I hope you get your rainbow baby soon ❤
I'm sorry for your loss
This is such a needed video for me. I too tested positive on the first of may exactly. For me the pregnancy was unplanned (I have an IUD) and i miscarried too. No one knows how far along I was. My body is still recovering and I feel like a tired hormonal mess. I wish you so much strength through the process of conceiving ♥
I cried happy tears with you and sad tears with you. I can’t imagine what you’re going through Ella. Sending positivity your way and I want to thank you for sharing. I haven’t been through this personally but a lot of close friends have.
I’m so sorry Ella! Just know that sooo many women, including myself, have gone through miscarriage and you are absolutely not alone. 🤍 my husband and I conceived on our honeymoon last year in June and unfortunately lost our baby in August, but we are now nearly 19 weeks pregnant with our rainbow baby. just know that there is so much hope after the darkness fades. 🤍🤍
I’m so sorry you and Nick are going through this😭 Angel baby is working on your rainbow no doubt🌈🤍 lots of love and cuddles to you!
Sending love to you and Nick❤ I haven’t gone through what you have but I do understand the grieving the life you were planning. It affects you so much more than we even realise. Sending massive hugs to you both and good girl pets to Mabel for being such a wonderful comfort ❤
I’m so sorry to hear your sad news, but I’m so so proud of you for speaking up about it.
Sending lots of love and strength to you both at this difficult time 💕
We love you so much Ella ❤
Oh Ella, I’m so sorry. It doesn’t matter how long or how short you carried that little baby, you carried it and loved it. There is nothing you did wrong, I know from experience you question everything you did and what if I did something differently. But you did nothing wrong my love. It’s so hard because life continues to move around you whilst you feel like it’s stopped.
You never stop questioning the what ifs, and you’re right it really does put a scarred experience on the pregnancy baby journey. You’ve got this Ella, I’m thinking of you both so much during this traumatic time. 🤍🌈
Ella my heart breaks for you and Nick 🥺😔 what an incredibly hard thing to go through. I’m sending all my love and strength your way 🩷 look after yourself gorgeous girl ❤️
You are so brave doing this at your lowest point. But also remember that you have a lot of family & friends & people who listen to your videos that are with you both. You will become a mum & dad when you don't expect it
Beautiful sweet Ella I am so sorry to hear of you loss sending you and Nick so much strength and love 💕 Thank you for opening up and talking about an awful but a unfortunately a very common thing. Seeing the love and joy between you and Nick when you found out was so beautiful and I’m sure in time you will both get to experience that again. Keep taking the time to grieve and heal but don’t lose hope. Lots of love to you and Nick
We also found out we were pregnant in New York ❤ ours didn’t last as long as yours so was classed as a chemical pregnancy. Definitely feel you, we had a few days in New York on our own and were the only people in the world who knew, it felt magical. I fell pregnant again the next month and we have a three year old now, I am Wishing you all the best for the future. I still think of what happened xx
Sending you love and so proud of you for being so vulnerable and sharing such an important topic with others. It’s truly a selfless act and I know so many women will appreciate this more than you’ll ever know ❤❤❤
Oh Ella 😔 I’m sorry for your loss. Thankyou for bravely sharing your story x
First, let me say thank you for sharing your feelings with the world. Words really aren’t going to help you right now, I know. I still have bad days and I lost my son 17 years ago now at 5 months into my pregnancy. The only advice I can give you is to feel all the feelings as they come. Keep talking to Nick, your family, friends and us. Whoever you want to and need to share with. We are here for you both. My heart aches for you both. Sending light and love from the US. ❤
Oh, I’m sorry. I hope everything will work out for you and your sadness will fade.
Ella and Nick, so sorry to hear this has happened but I'm a firm believer in signs and agree that the 🌈 means something... Incredibly brave to share your story and even though I personally haven't been through this, my close friends have and I'm so glad you have amazing friends and family around you to support .. your audience (including me) will be here and ready to virtually support when needed ❤
Completely sobbed throughout the whole video. I’m so sorry Ella, it will happen again 💖
So sorry for your loss Ella 😢 praying for you and Nick. Thank you for sharing this with us and normalising that a lot of woman go through this. I hope you start feeling better soon and I’m believing that your time will come ❤🌈
You did so well to sit there and share this on here with such composure. So terribly sorry for your loss. I could really feel the pain in your voice and I hate that this has happened. Wishing things only go up from here. Sending you both my love. ❤
I am so sorry. Like many of us on here, I have had 2 stillborn babies and never got my rainbow baby as my husband could not go through it again, but the urge in me was still so strong and it ended our marriage. Luckily I have one living child, who is now 33 and still the love of my life. I grieve for my son and daughter every day, time does not heal the pain but you just live with it and you can do nothing else. My son writes their names on every card that he ever gives me, it affected him so deeply when he was 7 the first time and nearly 9 the second time. He wanted a sibling so desperately. My love to you from Australia, my heart aches for you.
So sorry you had to go through that and not just once but twice 😢 much love your way ❤
My thoughts and prayers are with you and nick it's definitely Avery difficult situation to go through.
I miscarried my sweet baby at 8 weeks May 15, 2020 it was a time of complete isolation, mourning what could have been. Even now, sitting beside my sleeping rainbow baby I still yearn for my sweet first-born, I hope and pray that you will have your rainbow baby. Please know that it was nothing that you did, your sweet baby was just needed in heaven ❤️ Healing is not linear ❤️
I’m so so sorry 💙
Please know that nothing you did or didn’t do caused this. I’ve gone through a few losses myself, and it’s hard to believe that statement, but it’s true. You did nothing to cause this. It’s not your fault, and please try your best not to blame yourself.
Make sure to take the time you need to process everything💙
My heart goes out to you both & I’m sending you so much love & so many hugs 💙
Thank you for sharing your story 💙
Ella and Nick - I avoided watching this video for the longest time. My wife and I had a miscarriage at about the same point, after trying for 4 years.
I still think about that little love that we never got to meet. It’s hard to explain to people, how you can feel so deeply for someone you never met.
Don’t be afraid to not be ok, don’t be afraid to cry; that goes for both you. Be honest with each other and be there for each other. Things will get better. ❤️🩹
Oh Ella. Big hugs. I’m so sorry that you and Nick have gone through this. I’m just so sorry.
I just want to thank you so much for sharing this - 100% no pressure for you to however I appreciate it from the bottom of my heart that you are trying to break the stigma for us mamas xx
You for sure will have your time and have the most amazing little family!
The numbness and blame is so so so normal however please don’t blame yourself too much x
When i lost our baby i found it helpful to come to terms with by realising there was a reason as to why we were not meant to have that baby earthside and made me feel a bit of comfort in that horrible time ❤
Sending so much love to you and Nick 🌈
I'm so sorry you have experienced this. I teared up multiple times throughout the video. Sending love your way.
I don‘t know you but I send you so so much love my dear 🥺❤️ you will get through this and you will get your rainbow baby soon enough, maybe it just wasn‘t the right time, as dumb as that sounds, but the universe always has a plan. You got this, women are so strong ❤️
Oh I’m so sorry to hear that hun , it will happen xx
✋️ one of the 1 in 4 .. time, talk therapy, and an amazing support system helped immensely. Your body is amazing xx
My heart ABSOLUTELY breaks for you guys!!! These things are heartbreaking!!!! You and Nick WILL get your rainbow baby one day!!!! Sending you both SO MUCH love!!! ❤️🕊️🌈
I’m so sorry for your loss Ella. Thank you for sharing your story ❤
My heart is breaking for you but your honesty and openness is truly incredible. ❤
I sat here in tears the whole time, my absolutely heart breaks for you both. Sending you both all my love. 💗🌈
Thank you for sharing your precious little one with us ❤ I’m so sorry, Nick and Ella. Much love
😭 I am so so sorry Ella. I admire your openness so much and my heart is with you both xxx
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Sending love and prayers to you and your family xx
Sending so much love to you and your family. Please take the time you need ❤️ even if it’s randomly in two months or 5 years. Losses like this are hard. It’s very brave of you to talk about it.
I'm so sorry you had to go through this. Take care and wishing you the very best.
I am so sorry for your loss Ella, your rainbow baby will come and when it does it will be incredibly special. Sending love to you and Nick ❤🌈💐
thinking of you and nick during this hard time xx so much love 🤍
My heart breaks for you guys. I’m so sorry. Sending all my love 😭❤️